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"All of the ire I've swallowed"

Summary:

prompt: Collar, Touch Aversion, “Leave me alone.”
Whumptober 17
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So, in short, he had saved warriors. No big deal, would have done it for anyone. Its just in his nature to want to save people. Curse his stupid hero's soul for that one. Warriors had been standing in the line of fire, an ice arrow aimed at his upper back, so of course, wild jumped in the way, the arrow embedding itself in his own arm, causing his arm to freeze up, and lock in place. See ice didn't have the effect most thought it would, in fact it paralyzed whatever body part it hit, if it was in the chest however, he would have been temporarily paralyzed based on where it hit, lower would be legs, higher arms. Head meant death obviously.

So of course wild took the arrow for warriors, sure he only knew him two days, but it was better having him rather than the phoenix out of commission… or worse, dead.

So his question was, why was Warriors yelling at him?
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or
wild takes an arrow for wars, wars on the other hand, is NOT a fan of this self sacrificing.
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Title from: "take me to war" by the crane wives

Notes:

TW:
blood
arrow
panic attack
past abuse

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Wild only had joined days before, and he was already seeing problems. The young dragon didn't like touch, no, that wasn't right. He loathed touch. Whether it be from a friend or foe, he was never a fan of touch. According to zelda and others from a hundred years back, he had always been like that, if zelda so much as touched his hand, he would feel a burning sensation, one that made his heart hurt and his head spin. Wild didnt like those feelings, so he decided that touch was bad.

 

Another problem was a lot of the memories he got happened by touching something, or getting touched. One specifically of him being choked by who he assumed to be the commander of the army he was a part of, when he slept a minute to late and was a minute late to training that day. Besides him being choked he had been beaten relentlessly, struggling to breath and nearly passing out just before training began. 

 

And that was just the tip of the fucking ice berg. 

 

So, in short, he had saved warriors. No big deal, would have done it for anyone. Its just in his nature to want to save people. Curse his stupid hero's soul for that one. Warriors had been standing in the line of fire, an ice arrow aimed at his upper back, so of course, wild jumped in the way, the arrow embedding itself in his own arm, causing his arm to freeze up, and lock in place. See ice didn't have the effect most thought it would, in fact it paralyzed whatever body part it hit, if it was in the chest however, he would have been temporarily paralyzed based on where it hit, lower would be legs, higher arms. Head meant death obviously. 

 

So of course wild took the arrow for warriors, sure he only knew him two days, but it was better having him rather than the phoenix out of commission… or worse, dead. 

 

So his question was, why was Warriors yelling at him?

 

—---

 

“Wild!” the man yelled at him, wild was in the midst of pulling out the arrow as warriors approached him, warriors grabbed his collar aggressively, fire burning in his eyes as he glared at the younger. Burning, his head hurt, his chest hurt. He was desperately pushing down a memory, trying to force his mind to see this as a dangerous situation, which objectively, it was. 

 

Wild tried to get the phoenix away from him with minimal contact as possible, he kicked at wars, whilst keeping his head down, his panic settling in as he realized the elder wasn't going to let up.

 

“Do you have any fucking idea how pissed I am at you? What the fuck is your problem? Eh?” warriors yelled at him, wilds ears flattened against his head, he had no clue why warriors was so mad. He continued to kick at warriors, being lifted off the ground at this point. 

 

Let go! Please!’ he tried signing, he could feel his breathing quicken, his heart sinking as he felt the all too familiar feeling of a memory sneaking up on him, before he was lost from this world once more.

 

—--

 

“Link! What the hell were you doing?” link was confused, he had saved the commander at the risk of his own health, sure it wasn't a good habit, but it's how he was trained to do it since he was a baby, protect others, then yourself. Your life matters no more than theirs, go out protecting someone instead of like a coward. 

 

He knew he wasn't to talk, he wasn't allowed to talk. The snickers around him filled the air. “You nearly let me fucking die, is that what you want? Me to die?” Link desperately pointed at the cut across his chest, trying to motion he did save him. The commander raised an eyebrow, still looking enraged. “You didn't bother to parry it? You were supposed to parry, not take the blow! You absolutely useless child! I still got an arrow to the shoulder because you were to incompetent!” wild, only six at the time, nearly two years into training. knew he still had a long way to go, but this is what he was taught? He did what he was told to so why…

 

Why was everyone screaming at him?

 

“I'm bringing you up to King Rhoam for what you let happen today. I'm sure he won't let you off with anything good. But for that matter,” he picked him up by the throat, wild choked and coughed, clawing at his throat desperately. He was slammed against the wall, hitting his head harshly, he could feel the blood trickling down his face and back, the captain got ready to punch him, link closed his eyes, dreading the eventual punch that was soon to come…

 

But it never happen ed. 

 

It never.. Happened? He blinked, realizing he was in the real world, he was standing on his own two feet, instead of in the air suspended off the ground. Warriors was still yelling at him, he swatted his tail in warriors direction, the elder dropping him in shock. Wild pushed past warriors, avoiding the elders' pissed off voice as he headed back to camp, ignoring the stares of the rest of the chain. 

 

Please him. The back of his mind whispered, their always nicer if you just give them something they like.

 

What did warriors like again? Maybe making his favorite meal would make him stop yelling. Wasn't it grilled fish? He mentioned it to him once or twice in passing. Maybe he could make that for him! Wild pulled 8 fish out of the slate, he didn't need a part of the food, he didn't deserve it. He failed, he nearly let- he put the fish on a cutting board, slowly fileting each one, taking out all the bones meticulously. It was the one thing he could do right afterall, sure he could fight, but he could have gotten someone killed today if he didn't move fast enough.

 

  Wild made sure one last time that the fish was fully boneless, before starting on getting the rest of it, deciding he would make Seafood Paella. Warriors had mentioned he liked it right? He liked another type of Paella he had made two nights before. And if he didnt like it now it would be wilds fault, his fault for nearly getting warriors hurt and for not knowing what he liked. It had been two days already, and yet he didnt know everything about these people. What a failure. 

 

Wild added in the hylian rice to the cookpot with water in it, along with some salt. He had cleaned and made the rice mostly the other day, now he just had to make it for this specific dish. Once he finished with the rice, he poured out the water, putting the rice in a bowl for later use. He put in the Hearty blueshell snail since it would take the longest to cook, placing it in oil and mixing it with butter to add an extra layer of flavor to the meal. By now he was aware of people watching him, he could feel their eyes boring into the back of his skull, almost too scared to say anything. Wild didn't mind, he liked silence. 

 

“Wild need any help-” time asked, putting a hand on wilds shoulder. His shoulder ached, it burned, his heart hurt and his head felt fuzzy,  wild shook off Times hand quickly as it came, the burning remaining on his shoulder. 

 

He slowly put in the fish, adding salt and a light spice from gerudo city. It was a very mild spice, since he remembered Warriors didn't like spice, the people who liked spice were himself, twilight, time, and wind. Four legend and hyrule could tolerate it, whilst wars and sky couldn't have nearly any spice without complaining. 

 

He used a ladle to spoon some of the oil onto the rest of the fish, attempting to fry it all the way through. Sure it would be a bit different then how he usually made it, but he had recalled that warriors liked fried food. So seafood Paella, with minimal spice and fried fish as a substitution for normal fish, he thought it was a perfect meal. He quickly plated each of the dishes, making sure each was perfect before finally turning around, noticing all eyes on him as he handed out each dish. He looked down at the ground when giving warriors his dish, warriors looked surprised when he looked at the dish, before attempting to talk to wild once again.

 

“Hey look im sorry for snapping at you-” wild moved on to the next person, four. Who gratefully took the dish. Once the dishes were all handed out, he cleared out the cooking pot for dessert. Did warriors say he liked pumpkin pie or was that time? No time was Apple pie. Warriors was pumpkin pie, wind liked honeyed candies. Twilight liked egg pudding, but also liked pumpkin pie. Sky similarly likes pumpkin pie but liked honeyed apples as well. Legend said he liked nutcake, but also liked carrot cake. Hyrule really liked honeyed crepes and any other honey related dessert, he also liked wilds honey milk, but that was mainly for when it was cold. So pumpkin pie it was. 

 

The group stayed silent besides the crackling of the fire, wild looked at them in confusion, usually they would have started telling tales of their adventures or, talking about some stupid shit that wild couldn't care less about. He had only known them a couple days but he could tell their schedule already, so to break it this early meant that something was severely wrong with the group. Maybe they were sick? Oh goddesses did they not like the food? Wild turned to look at warriors, who was eating his food with an unreadable expression. Ah so he didn't like the food. Darn, who liked them then?

 

Wild pulled out a moderately sized pumpkin before he cut it into eighths, putting it in the pot so it could loosen up the insides a bit more quickly. While that was being made, he combined goat butter, cane sugar, tabantha wheat and some milk into a bowl, mixing together to get dough like texture. Once he was sure that it was doughy enough, he put it into one of the pans he had made on his travels, taking out the circular part he put in another circular part that was significantly smaller then the other. He had already laid out the pie crust in there, he scooped out the insides of the pumpkin and started to mash it in his mortar and pestle, mixing it with a little cream to get the perfect consistency. He poured it into the pan, and tapped it a couple times to even out. Before long, he was happy with the baking process and left it to bake on its own, turning back towards the chain who still were watching him carefully. 

 

What.’

 

“Wild I-” wild tilted his head to the side.

 

Did you like the food? I remember you said you liked seafood, and you liked the paella from the other day. Plus you said you preferred fried food over the less cooked fish that is usually in this, so I hope its to your liking W A R S.” he signed quickly, the tip of his tail flicked back and forth as he watched the group carefully.

 

“You… remembered all that? Seriously how- I mentioned it in passing. ” warriors spluttered, wild shrugged at him. 

 

I remember what everyone in my hyrule likes to eat, what their name is, who they're related to. Remembering what food you liked is easy for me.’ Wild signed as if it was nothing, which it was nothing for him. Apparently the others didn't think the same.

 

“All of them?!” Wind asked incredulously, “how did you do that?! I forget some of the sailors in my boats names sometimes!”

 

S a i l o r s? Never heard of that.’ he ignored winds offended gasp ‘ my hyrule doesn't have many people in it. Only a hundred gerudo, hundred fifty hylians? Fifty sheikah, fifty gorons, sixty rito, and around seventy five zora.’ 

 

“Your hyrules that… empty?”

 

Yours aren't?’ he asked back at four, who quickly shook his head. Wild shrugged, un bothered by the group's confusion. He checked on the pie, only around ten minutes to go.

 

“Wild could i talk to you? Only for a minute?” wars stood up, offering a hand to wild, who ignored it, better not to touch the hand thats soon to hurt. He stood beside him, looking back at the pie once more before following warriors into the woods.

 

Better be quick because the pies going to burn.’ wild signed, oblivious to what warriors true intentions for bringing him out there was. Was it to hurt him? He nearly let him get hurt, so that was a definite contender.

 

“Wild, you still have the fucking arrow in your arm.” wild blinked, only now noticing its presence. He put his hand on the arrow, getting ready to pull it out before warriors made a startled noise, gently grabbing wilds hand away from the arrow. Burning, his chest hurt, his brain was getting fuzzy. “Wild you cant just try and grab it out of your arm like that- you could make it worse for yourself.” he chided, he took out a knife from his belt, wild then decided that was in fact the thing he had come out there for, wars was going to stab him. 

 

‘Hey wait before you… well. Listen, I tried my hardest to avoid you all getting hurt– I stopped that arrow from hitting your heart so that's gotta count for something right?’ his frenzied panic settled in, backing away from wars, getting further away from camp. ‘ Listen, I'll try harder next time, I promise, just please don't stab me.’ 

 

Wars looked horrified, and confused at the same time. “Sorry, stab you?” wild nodded. “Why the hell would I stab you? I'm trying to use the knife to– ok technically it is stabbing, but the arrow is embedded in your shoulder real good, and i don't want to hurt you so i use this to relieve pain alright?” wild shook his head.

 

I cant feel any pain, ice arrow freezes your nerves.’ he was now confused. ‘ Why do you seem so confused about stabbing me? I nearly failed to protect you, so I'm in trouble, that's why you brought me away from camp right?’ wars smacked his head against the palm of his hand. 

 

“No wild, I came out here since you still have the goddamn arrow in your arm, and everyone's eating, so I don't want to ruin their appetite by ripping out a bloody arrow in front of them.” he explained. Wilds brows furrowed in confusion. 

 

So were you choking me earlier your punishment for this or…’ warriors gave an exasperated sigh, going to pat wild on the shoulder before finally seeing something.

 

“At ease wild.” he finally said, wild could feel his body loosen up almost instantly, all previous tension falling from his body, now he was slumped over, back no longer straight as bored. Warriors had a saddened look across his face. “Were you a soldier wild?”

 

‘Yes sir, soldier for ten years and F L O R A S guard for three. Why ask?’ warriors cringed at the use of sir, but let it rest. 

 

“For ten years? Aren't you like, what. Seventeen?”

 

Yes, and what of it?’

 

So you have been in the fucking army since you were seven?” wars gave a horrified look. “I was enlisted at fucking sixteen what the hell wild?”

 

Seven? Did you not hear me?’ wild paused for a moment, ‘don't answer that, I said three years as royal knight for F L O R A. so since i was four.’ Wild looked at him curiously. ‘ So like can you get this over with? All the’ he made quotation marks in the air ‘ bad job today wild, do better tomorrow, and get whatever punishment you have ready out of the way? Cause I have pumpkin pie finishing up right now and I don't want to have to remake it.’ 

 

“Goddesses wild, understand me, your not in trouble, I was mad earlier cause I didn't like seeing you hurt, you only just joined us and you already are sacrificing yourself for others, its a bad habit and I wanted you to stop that habit, I was explaining this earlier but you suddenly froze like you did the other day–”

 

Memory. It was a memory. I was remembering something that happened that was similar.’ wild explained, warriors froze, wild wished he could read his mind to know what he was thinking at that moment, but unfortunately he couldn't, and was left trying to pick up clues from warriors face. 

 

“And you're telling me… I… triggered that?” 

 

Its ok, don't feel guilty, its my fault really-’ wild signed, before warriors grabbed both of his hands, burning, his chest hurt, his head felt fuzzy-

 

“Wild, its not your fault its mine,I… I forgot your just a fuckin kid. Let me take the hit next time, try and stop it another way then with your body ok?” wild winced, he was used to pulling shit like this, according to zelda, he had been doing it all his life as much as she had seen him. And she saw him alot since he was living on grounds at the castle barracks.

 

“Sorry.” he mumbled, only quiet enough so warriors could hear the gentle whisper,  warriors looked shocked momentarily before clapping him on the back.

 

“Now, let's get you back to that pie, hopefully it's not burnt. It's my favorite ya know.”

 

I know.’


Much to both of their surprises, the pie was completely fine, wild dishing out the pie quickly, and the friendly atmosphere returned.

Notes:

hope you enjoyed! this was the second one i actually wrote and i still think its one of my favorites lol.
four in one night- the next will be out hopefully tommorrow, but i am not sure ill finnish it by tommorrow. I had so many prewriten, but 18 was NOT one of them. so its like- halfway done.
but seeing as i wrote ALOT of 14 today, being around 4000 words of it, hopefully i can do alot tommorrow.

kudos and comments appreciated!

have a good day/night