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Fixing up the celebratory balloons of the post-baby baby shower, March turned to the Trailblazer and clapped her hands together, eyes sparkling with excitement. “It looks good, right?”
The Astral Express was holding a small party, given that their intended celebrations for Dan Heng’s miracle had been delayed for months on end. From Congratulations on Conceiving! (Dan Heng had shot this idea down wordlessly with a chagrined frown; sheepish, March had immediately felt terrible for suggesting it), to Welcome Back from the Waterscape! Oh, Wow, There’s an Egg! (Dan Heng had insisted this remain a secret, and the secret had gone on indefinitely until that handsome but unhinged Stellaron Hunter had infiltrated the Express – what did that guy want with Dan Heng anyway?), all of March’s attempts at commemorating Dan Heng’s egg-scapade had been rejected.
March didn’t mind.
Dan Heng no longer seemed as melancholic as before, back when he would refuse to leave his room, afraid of others seeing him in his changed state. Dan Heng had always been a quiet person, but March had overheard him speaking to both the egg and the baby that had emerged from the egg. It had been reassuring to know Dan Heng wasn’t alone, never had been alone.
And when March had seen Dan Heng smile at what had been causing him endless grief only months ago, she felt as though a weight had been lifted from her shoulders. That was the point of the celebrations, anyway – March, and all of the Astral Express, wanted Dan Heng to be safe and happy.
It was always hard to tell when Dan Heng didn’t voice his thoughts, but March could tell. Dan Heng’s child was incredibly important to him, even if he didn’t say it.
Six months was a momentous occasion to celebrate, after all. Half of being one year old. Although, now that March thought about it, those of half-Vidyadhara descent probably lived on different timelines to the short-life folk. Given the baby had characteristic Vidyadhara features, March could only assume there was a long life ahead of the cutie patootie.
Ahem.
March was getting carried away. But peering down at the little one in the cot, March couldn’t help but coo. So small! So cute! Those squishy hands, those pudgy cheeks, that boopable nose!
Now that the baby wasn’t constantly coddled in Dan Heng’s arms, March could finally admire Dan Heng’s tiny creation.
“I wonder what your name is,” March said, pitching her voice higher in the manner of baby talk. She stroked the jade scales on the baby’s tail, eyes lighting up as the baby returned her affection by wrapping their tail around March’s wrist. “Daniel Hennington Ian Lewis?”
The tail uncoiled around March and flopped away.
“Oh, I guess that sounds a bit off.” March hummed to herself, putting a hand to her chin, deep in thought. “Ooh, how about: Dane Hendrick Isaac Liu!”
Hmm, no, that didn’t sound right either.
Welt cleared his throat from where he had appeared beside March. He pressed his index finger to the bridge of his glasses. “I believe Dan Heng has already named her, even if he has not informed us yet.”
March pouted. “Do you think he’d let me name his next one? I can think up a whole list of names!”
“Next one?” Dan Heng scooped up his child and cradled her to his chest, voice flabbergasted, delicate facial features aghast. “You sound just like him.”
Like who?
Who was the father?
March stared intensely. The baby looked like a mix of Dan Heng and… someone familiar…
March racked her brain to try and piece the clues together.
Oh!
Like that guy on the wanted poster!
Wait…
Huh…?
Hmm…
Probably a weird coincidence.
March dismissed the thought. There was no way Dan Heng would have a child with a wanted outlaw.
How absurd!
*
AITA for knocking up my enemy but not wanting to look after our kid?
posted by notabaddiejustabladie 2 hours ago
(??M, old man energy I guess, technically immortal but we don’t talk about the details) unintentionally knocked up my lover-from-a-lifetime-ago-turned-enemy-now-lover (25M, but actually he undergoes hatching rebirth so technically he’s older, also he’s a dragon so I feel like that should reduce the severity of my actions because who doesn’t wanna bang a dragon, although he wasn’t in his dragon form at the time, but ANYWAY…) 15 months ago. Unbeknownst to me, he delivered the baby and I only found out recently. The baby is cute, but I’m busy jumping around galaxies and committing crimes for the sake of the universe.
After I slept with my enemy/lover again, I told him that I don’t have the time or interest to properly look after a child and he called me an asshole. That being said, I really like banging him and the only way to keep banging him is to stay on his good side and look after our child. Now I’m swaddled with a kid I never wanted, trying not to get blood on her cheeks (apparently violence is Bad for her development…?).
Surely there are other ways to go about this – for example, he has friends who can and would love to babysit her – but he wouldn’t listen to me and told me he had important things to do and needed me to be there for our kid. But why saddle me with looking after her if my whole being is the antithesis of a good father (I say this proudly btw)? He knows I’m not good for him or our kid, but he still wants me around. At least I clearly stated my intentions, even if it came across as rude.
So, am I the asshole?
Silver Wolf finished reading her creation to the subject of her post, scrolling through the comments on her phone. It was relatively boring without Kafka and Elio around – they had headed off somewhere without them, citing the fact that Blade needed to babysit and that they didn’t need Silver Wolf’s genius-hacker street cred. Eh, their loss.
Swinging her feet, Silver Wolf blew a chewing gum bubble. It exploded with a loud pop, startling the baby in Blade’s arms into a rousing cry.
“You woke her,” Blade deadpanned from where he was sitting on the couch, and if looks could kill, Silver Wolf would have been run through with his sword already.
Silver Wolf tried not to laugh, watching Blade panic as he rubbed at the baby’s back. Shushing noises and rocking motions followed. The baby gurgled and rested on Blade’s chest, eyes closing.
No harm done.
Blade breathed a quiet sigh of relief. He looked exhausted, the usual crazed energy sapped out of him, but Silver Wolf didn’t understand why. Kafka hadn’t needed to suppress Blade’s mara recently, and Blade seemed fine despite it.
It was weird. Could parenthood truly change someone that much?
“So, the universe’s consensus is mixed,” Silver Wolf declared, reading from her phone, “about your assholery.”
belobogbbg · 1 hr. ago
ASSHOLE because your main priority is banging your hot dragon enemy/lover instead of caring for him as a person. Sounds like your lover might just want you to show that you care about him and your child
justiceappellation · 1 hr. ago
Not the asshole. You didn’t ask for the kid. Also why didn’t you use protection? Actually, now that I think about it, you are the asshole for not using protection smh
↪ xianzhou_expat · 1 hr. ago
↪ all the mentions of a dragon but not mating in dragon form makes sense if the lover is a vidyadhara, no? and they can’t get preg, so OP is a liar and an asshole
luochachacha · 30 min. ago
NTA. Sounds like you got baby-trapped. My condolences.
“Did I ask?” Blade huffed. One hand holding the infant in place against his chest, the other hand twiddling at the uneven ends of his hair. “I don’t need strangers around the universe commenting on my relationship with Dan Heng, or my newly discovered daughter. It’s already complicated enough. And baby-trapped? That’s absurd! They don’t know what Dan Heng went through. How can they assume such nefarious intentions from your post? What did you write exactly? Did you mention the part where both of us assumed he was infertile? It’s not his fault. Also, did you mention how sexy Dan Heng is? His waist is so small and grabbable. Whenever I see it, I just want to squeeze it. Who wouldn’t want to impregnate him—”
Ugh, gross.
Ignoring Blade’s last few comments, Silver Wolf had never heard Blade go on a tirade like that before. Sure, she had seen him angry, ravenous for blood, and murderous, in that exact same order, but defending the honour of a man he supposedly hated?
“Your relationship with that pretty boy on the Express is confusing, no cap,” Silver Wolf replied, interrupting Blade’s spiel. “Never thought you’d have that rizz in you.”
“I literally do not understand half the words you just said.”
Silver Wolf shrugged. It wasn’t her fault Blade was a boomer. “So, your kid, where did she come from exactly? Since pretty boy is a guy and you’re a guy—”
“Her name is Ling,” Blade interjected, as though it was common knowledge. Even Kafka didn’t know, always referring to Blade’s spawn as ‘that little one’.
“What!” Silver Wolf covered her mouth in faux shame at Blade’s pointed glare. Returning to a normal and acceptable decibel range, she said, “You should’ve named her Poggers, like I recommended!”
“Would you name your children that?” Blade raised an eyebrow.
“No, what kinda lunatic do you think I am? Also, ew, kids.”
Blade rolled his eyes. He was distracted again by Ling who babbled and pawed at his chest, her tiny fists curled up and her bright ruby eyes welling up with tears. Confused and growing agitated, Blade asked, “Why is she doing this?”
“Maybe she thinks your milkers are poggers.”
Blade blinked. Then he spoke to Ling in a firm voice: “I have no milk.”
“Sounds like a skill issue,” muttered Silver Wolf.
“I’m starting to think it was a bad idea to babysit with you,” Blade said, retrieving a nursing bottle from the bag Dan Heng had given them after dropping Ling off. Cradling Ling in one arm, he put the bottle to her mouth. “I don’t want her first words to be something you would say.”
“Your loss.” Silver Wolf already had devious machinations to teach Ling how to play co-op games, since her father was clearly not going to follow through with his promise to game together.
After Ling had finished feeding, Blade leaned down to put away the now empty bottle. In this moment, Silver Wolf studied in abject fascination as Ling seemed to slip from Blade’s hold and Blade’s face contorted in slow motion to one of petrified anguish. Ling’s long, azure draconic tail was looped around Blade’s forearm, and Blade didn’t seem to realise until Ling babbled, dangling above the floor and perfectly healthy.
Huh, Silver Wolf had never seen Blade care about anything except dying before.
A look of betrayal flashed through Blade’s eyes as he lifted up his arm and peered at his child, nary a care in the world. One arm holding Ling steady, Blade unravelled her tail from his arm and then sat her down on the couch to chide her. “Don’t ever do that again. You scared daddy, okay?”
Silver Wolf fake-retched. “What the fuck, man? Gross.”
“Hey, don’t swear in front of my kid.”
Silver Wolf rolled her eyes. “You get pretty boy to call you daddy too or something?”
Blade blanched. “You know, I’m going to choose to not answer that question,” Blade said, suddenly pragmatic because he had a child?
It was different. Silver Wolf didn’t hate this side of Blade, but it was like seeing a version of Blade without the symptoms of his mara sickness.
Silver Wolf had thought that too soon, because now Blade was curling up into a ball on the floor beside the couch.
“What are you doing?” Silver Wolf tapped Blade’s foot with her own.
“I’m stressed because I thought I almost dropped Ling, and Dan Heng would’ve gutted me, and I don’t want to think about anything anymore.”
Silver Wolf stared.
Ling had jumped onto her father, unafraid of all things, clawing her journey back into his arms. “She’s just… crawling on you…” It would be a cute sight, but ugh, realising Blade had spawned this? Ew. “I’d offer to play with her, so you can suffer in peace, but… I think she likes your poggers milkers.”
“Maybe that’s where all my rizz is stored.”
Silver Wolf would be proud, but that would require admitting to herself that she was fond of Blade.
*
“Dan Heng! Any new tricks to teach me today?” Bailu stood with her arms akimbo, staring up at the man in front of her.
Dan Heng, in his Yinyue garb, unfortunately had no new teachings to offer Bailu and shook his head. Today, instead, he was hoping for her help. Ignoring the murmurs of passersby at the Aurum Alley Night Markets, Dan Heng didn’t mind the attention his Vidyadhara horns brought when he walked alongside Bailu, whose own opalescent lilac-hued horns and shackled tail reminded him he wasn’t the only one to suffer from the title of High Elder. Bailu, despite her youthful child-like visage, provided kinship that no other Vidyadhara could.
“I’m looking to buy a jade pendant,” Dan Heng said, leaving out the fact that he wanted it to match his own and Blade’s. Jade pendants were an accessory popular among the Vidyadhara for their longevity matching the entire duration of their long life, and their ability to be furtively carried across during the rebirth process to remember a lover. “A pendant for someone currently smaller than you. I hope you won’t mind assisting me.”
“I don’t mind. Happy to help!” Bailu grinned, her joyous demeanour infectious. Dan Heng found the corners of his lips lifting into a slight smile.
Bailu led the path down the alley, pausing every now and then to peer at the sticks of tanghulu or the various flavours of puffergoat milk ice cream. Her round eyes were radiant with curiosity, and Dan Heng wondered if his daughter would grow up to have the same inquisitiveness.
“Y’know, when I hadn’t seen you for a while, I was worried you were avoiding me,” Bailu said.
Dan Heng didn’t need to look to hear the sadness wavering in the edges of her voice. Bailu might not have been blood-related, but like those on the Astral Express, she was still someone important to Dan Heng. Paying for a stick of sweet rice cake covered in brown sugar syrup, Dan Heng crouched down and handed the end to Bailu. “My apology, then. I didn’t intend for it to seem that way.”
Bailu grinned, grabbing the stick. Munching on the rice cake, her woes were already forgotten.
“Something happened. I’ll explain when you’re older,” Dan Heng decided on. Even for a High Elder, there were some things that Dan Heng wouldn’t expect Bailu to understand. Perhaps she would understand how significant of a role their Vidyadhara roots played into his decision, but the details would not be something he felt comfortable in explaining just yet.
Bailu stomped her feet and scrunched up her face. “No! I wanna know now!”
“It won’t make sense right now.” Dan Heng’s voice remained gentle, calming her down. He had dangled something that would entice her curiosity without meaning to.
Bailu frowned for a second before she shook it off. “Okay, if you say so,” Bailu replied. “As long as you’re healthy and happy, I won’t pry further.”
Dan Heng smiled politely, an ambivalent expression, unsure of how to answer her.
Was he happy? Dan Heng pondered this while they surveyed the jewellery on offer at the Aurum Alley artisans’ store.
He had been thrust into fatherhood alongside a man who had wanted to kill him, a man who drummed up memories within Dan Heng of a happier life now lost. His child resembled Blade in appearance; it was impossible to deny who the other parent was. And yet, Dan Heng could not bring himself to keep her away from Blade. Even if he knew Blade was dangerous, even if he had been countlessly warned by others that Blade’s mara sickness symptoms could resurface at anytime and that Blade might be made to forget them, he refused to back from the heated flames of the fire.
Dan Heng wondered if that made him a bad father.
“Dan Heng, do you have a piece of real jade?” Bailu asked, pointing to a small jade pendant necklace she had been eyeing at the store. Her shrill voice interrupted Dan Heng from his musings. “We gotta test if this is the real thing by hitting them together.”
“Hey!” The storekeeper groaned, “Lady Bailu, I’ll have you know all the gemstones and jewellery in this store are real.”
“I’ll see for myself!” Bailu hmphed and folded her arms, daring the storekeeper to retort otherwise.
Dan Heng was impressed. Bailu had a good eye, pinpointing the beautiful design from the myriad of offerings the store provided. Not only that, but she had the knowledge to try and distinguish fakes. There was a myriad of information that Bailu knew, even at her young age.
The jade pendant Dan Heng always kept on him was such an integral part of him that he had to think for a moment before he realised that he did indeed have a piece of real jade. Even after transforming, he had stored the jade pendant within the pockets of his hanfu, not knowing why it felt so wrong to be without it.
“I do have a piece of real jade,” Dan Heng said, retrieving the item from his pockets. He held it up into the light, before handing it over to Bailu.
Bailu picked up the jade pendant, striking them together.
The sound of jade tinkling resonated within Dan Heng, reminding him of a memory that didn’t belong to him.
“Ooh, it’s real,” Bailu commented. She placed the pendant down and looked to Dan Heng, confusion flickering through her expression. She tugged at Dan Heng’s sleeve. “Dan Heng… why are you crying?”
Ling.
That was the name Yingxing wanted to name their child. The fragment of the memory was haphazardly conjured in Dan Heng’s mind, the realisation seeping into the recesses of his heart. The recollection savoured like a sip of cold liquor, Dan Heng tasted both sweet nostalgia and bitter regret in coming to terms with how different his relationship with Blade had become, when compared to his past self and Yingxing’s.
What Dan Heng had with Blade was a twisted version of love, if he could even describe it as such. Being bestowed a child with the man who resented him had not made life easier, but it hadn’t made life worse either. What he had now was what Dan Feng and Yingxing so desperately wanted but could never have.
But was this what he, Dan Heng, wanted? A family, a home with Blade and Ling?
Dan Heng smiled to reassure Bailu, wiping at his cheeks with his sleeve.
Even though he was far too many months late than what he deemed forgivable, he had finally figured out the right name for his daughter. He wondered if Blade remembered too.
“The pendant is perfect. Thank you,” Dan Heng said softly, with renewed determination in his voice. A gift for Ling – the importance of which she might understand later on in life.
“You’re welcome!” Bailu grinned, proud.
Seeing her cute smile, Dan Heng decided on revealing the truth. It wasn’t that he was embarrassed or ashamed about his situation; he had come to terms with reality now, but it still felt awkward to bring up in conversation. “It’s actually for my daughter. I hope you can meet her one day – when she’s old enough, I’ll bring her here. I’m sure you two would become good friends.”
“Does that mean you won’t have time to see me anymore?” Bailu’s voice grew small, her eyes pleading.
The question took Dan Heng by surprise. When speaking about his child, he had assumed he would always be questioned about the infertility of the Vidyadhara. Dan Heng reassured, “No, I’ll always make time for you, just like right now.”
Bailu puffed out her chest to make her stature seem bigger and placed her hands on her hips. “Good, because I’m going to be the best jiejie for her. Don’t you worry!”
Dan Heng crouched down and hugged her. That specifically had never been a worry for him to begin with, but having people around him who supported him regardless was something he was grateful for. “Thank you, Bailu.”
*
Group Chat with Jing Yuan, Blade, and Dan Heng
Blade: dan heng
Blade: i already miss u
Blade: bb misses u too [attached image – Ling resting on Blade’s chest]
Dan Heng: …
Dan Heng: I miss you and Ling too.
Blade: i miss sucking on ur tits
Blade: can u send me some pics of ur swollen nips :3
Blade: just pull open ur boob window and show me :3 if ur in ur yinyue outfit tht is :3
Blade: or just go take off ur clothes :D
Jing Yuan: … this is a group chat… i’m right here…
Blade: get out then
Jing Yuan: …
Dan Heng: Ignore him. I apologise, Jing Yuan.
Blade: i accidentally clicked on the wrong chat room
Blade: it’s not my fault
Dan Heng: I will pick up Ling soon.
Blade: can we get jing yuan to babysit he already babysits that brat yanqing anyway
Blade: jing yuan help out a brother in need
Blade: it’s hard to get off in peace these days
Jing Yuan: ??? but did i ask
Dan Heng is now offline.
Jing Yuan is now offline.
Blade is now offline.
*
Arriving at the Stellaron Hunters’ hideout, Dan Heng was allowed entrance by Silver Wolf, who didn’t seem surprised to see him. She raised an eyebrow at him, before returning her attention back to her phone, jerking her thumb towards the corridor to indicate where to go.
Following that path through the atrium, he arrived at his destination, surveying his surroundings. Their place was more homely than he expected – there were no photographs of any sort, but clutter ranging from game cartridges to old magazines littered the coffee table and floor, giving it a lived-in appearance.
Dan Heng found Blade napping on the couch. Blade’s eyes were closed, the serenity and composure on his face one that Dan Heng rarely saw before. Blade’s peaceful expression was surreal, contrasting both the bandages that looped his left hand and the myriad of memories Dan Heng held of Blade’s violent frenzies. Blade cradled a sleeping Ling in his arms.
Fondness blooming in his chest, Dan Heng realised he had never seen Blade let down his guard in this manner. Like this, Blade seemed more like Yingxing than the weapon he had forged himself into.
A stray strand of Blade’s hair caught Dan Heng’s attention. Wanting to brush it out of Blade’s face, Dan Heng leaned forward.
Blade’s red eyes flashed open, staring into Dan Heng’s. “You…”
Startled, Dan Heng flushed at the sudden attention. “You look different when you’re asleep,” Dan Heng said, hoping it would suffice. He thought about reaching forward to retrieve Ling, but seeing her sleeping so soundly with Blade had him hesitating, hovering around them. As afraid as he was of Blade’s mara symptoms flaring up around Ling, he still found himself wanting Blade to look after their child. Perhaps trusting him was a product of naivete or affection, a vestige of his past self. It was easier to blame Dan Feng for how he felt now than to think through the reality he found himself in.
“Did you miss me?” Blade teased, grabbing Dan Heng’s wrist. His sly grin made Dan Heng’s heart jump to his throat.
To admit that he did to Blade’s face felt like an unnecessary provocation. Dan Heng shook off Blade’s hold, ignoring Blade’s dismayed frown that surfaced so readily. Sitting down beside Blade, Dan Heng checked on Ling first, thumbing at her round cheek. Seeing her deep in slumber and knowing she was safe helped settle the protectiveness that shackled Dan Heng. Sometimes it was still hard to believe she was real.
“Surprised to see her still alive?” Blade was unable to keep the bitterness out of his deep voice.
“No.” Dan Heng shook his head. Now it was his turn to tease Blade. “I’m surprised you’re still alive after babysitting her.”
Blade laughed, growing quiet when Dan Heng leaned into him and pressed a soft kiss to his lips, gentle and tender. When Dan Heng pulled away, Blade chased after his mouth and stole another kiss, whispering against his lips, “Is that all for my reward?”
“If I think of something else, I’ll let you know,” replied Dan Heng, resting his head on Blade’s shoulder and cuddling up to his favourite source of warmth. This – raising a child with someone his past self loved dearly, with someone who had been chasing him to the ends of the universe to enact revenge – was not something Dan Heng planned to be a part of his new life, but being beside Blade and Ling now, his heart ached at the mere thought of losing them.
As if aware of the worries running through Dan Heng’s mind, Blade looped an arm around Dan Heng, a possessive grip on his waist. There was no one else in the room apart from them and Ling, but Blade still felt the need to hold onto him so tightly.
Dan Heng found that he didn’t mind so much. He wouldn’t have it any other way.
*