Chapter Text
It was a hot and a monotonous day as the Marshal and the generals of III Corps rested in the former’s tent. The drills for the day had ended, the letters to their wives and other loved ones had been written and they hadn’t fought an enemy because of the peace treaty.
“Who knew peace would be so boring?” A young general named Morand complained, in an attempt to start a conversation.
“Well, it has been no more than three days, monsieur. I am certain enjoyable parts will come on a later date.” Another general, Gudin, replied with a smile.
“God created Earth in 7 days. Is it too much to expect the same quick performance?” The oldest of the four, Friant, answered dryly.
“Considering how the other ‘peace’ treaties ended up, we will be having our fun in a shortwhile.” Said their Marshal, Davout, as he took off his glasses and began to clean them.
“Very pessimistic, Monsieur le Maréchal.” Gudin pouted at his superior and best friend.
“Realistic is what he is.” Friant shrugged.
Morand snorted.
“Is there something wrong, Morand?” Davout raised his eyebrow.
“No, no. Just listening you three talk.”
“Then please join us. We don’t want you to feel left out.” Gudin smiled again.
Morand narrowed his eyes, trying to see whether the slightly older general was serious. A moment later, he sighed.
“I don’t even have the will to do our usual arguing with you, Davout. That’s how much of a boring day it is.”
“Good. Because neither do I. Not that fighting with you is worth my time to begin with.”
“What did you just say?” Morand hissed. Davout looked at him curiously.
“Get ready, Gudin. Here’s the fun I’ve been waiting for.” Friant tapped Gudin’s shoulder. Gudin just shaked his head at the almost childish in-fighting between his colleagues.
Just as the Marshal and his subordinate was about to have another row, a lively voice boomed from the entrance.
“Monsieur le Maréchal, news from the Major General!”
Davout turned to see his aide-de-camp Trobriand. Young man looked excited for some reason. The bespectacled man adjusted his glasses and raised his hand to get the paper. Trobriand quickly gave it to his commander.
As Davout read the report from Berthier, his eyes ever so slightly widened. Others gathered around him.
“So? What is it?” Friant asked.
Davout tossed the paper aside.
“Our salaries are getting cut.” He replied simply.
“By how much?” Morand questioned.
“Twenty-five percent. Reparations barely covered the debt in the treasury. ‘Austerity’ was decided.”
“Let’s pray Murat handles it well. Guy’s gonna get only 2500 pure silk clothes if this becomes the norm.” Friant snickered. A faint, sadistic smile appeared on Davout’s face. Gudin clapped to get everyone’s attention
“Okay, gentlemen. We have an important question: Do we need an additional work to get by?”
Morand closed his eyes, calculating the reduction. He gulped.
“Yeah.”
“Probably.” Came an almost apathetic reply from Friant.
Davout nodded.
Gudin put his hand on his chin.
“Looks like we all face the same predicament. Do you have any ideas or leads?”
Trobriand, who was quietly but obviously waiting for this question, smiled from ear to ear. He took out a crumpled bulletin from his pocket and held it out for others to see.
Davout looked closer at the bulletin. In it, there was a black and white… lifelike drawing of a bear with a black top hat. He began reading the text beside the bear.
“Family pizzeria looking for security guard to work the nightshift.
12am-6am.
Monitor cameras, ensure safety of equipment and animatronic characters.
Not responsible for injury/dismemberment.”
“Cameras?” Friant wondered out loud. "The hell are cameras?"
"I wonder if that bear is one of the 'animatronic characters'," Gudin chimed in. "Maybe they are like Da Vinci's creations."
"Guys, are you going to ignore part where it literally says they won't care if we get torn to pieces?!" Morand exclaimed.
"It is already a part of our life,” Davout replied in a deadpan tone “Why are you afraid of it now?”
“I don’t know… maybe because it’s a damn night shift in a children’s place?!” Morand shot back in an outraged tone.
“Morand made a good point…” Gudin spoke up, much to the pleasure of man in question. “We should consider the risks before deciding.”
“I say we apply anyway. We faced odds against 3 to 1 in Auerstedt. What could possibly go wrong?” Friant, once again, shrugged.
“Trobriand, I am assuming you’re also in favor of this job?” The Marshal looked at his aide-de-camp. Trobriand nodded eagerly.
“I understand your concerns,” Davout started, turning to Gudin and Morand. “But I feel the reward outweighs the risk by quite a margin.”
Morand looked angrily at Davout and was about to say something before he changed his mind. Davout cleared his throat.
“Okay then. Are we applying for the night shift?”
11.45PM
“Well, guys, we are here!” Trobriand said happily at the entrance of a somewhat rundown but still colorful pizzeria.
“Why are you so thrilled?” Friant mumbled groggily while also rubbing his eyes.
“Because I get to spend more personal time with you four!” Trobriand replied with a smile.
“I’m touched.” Morand replied quietly.
They entered the building and were immediately plunged in darkness. A glimmer of light in the other part of the pizzeria was their only source of visibility.
“I am assuming that location is our work area.” Gudin pointed out.
“I hope so. I am already half blind, no need to make it harder for me.” Davout grumbled.
The group made their way to the light, careful as not to slip and fall. Trobriand looked at the walls and saw some metallic and rectangular boxes at certain places. Before he could mention it, a shocked cry came from Davout.
“Oudinot?!”
The man looked up, who was evidently stuffing his face with a piece of food, most likely so-called ‘pizza’. Oudinot, too, looked a bit shocked but it quickly turned into happiness. He got up from his chair and hugged the bald man.
“Davout, old sport! How are you doing?”
“Decent. But I gotta say, better with seeing you.”
“Your clique is here, it looks like. Hi to y’all as well.”
“You’re here for the same reason, buddy?” Friant grinned despite his sleepiness.
Oudinot shook his head.
“Nah. I got into a fight with a Brit while I was eating pizza. Bastard landed a lucky hit on me and I woke up here. The doors were locked and I couldn’t exit.”
All of them fell silent.
“…But we just entered. Without a key.” Trobriand murmured.
“Oudinot, I know you have the potential for it so I will be direct. Did you push the door when you had to pull it towards yourself?” Morand said, barely trying to sound nice about it.
Oudinot thought about it for a moment.
“I dunno. Want some pizza everyone?”
Morand facepalmed.
“I take that as a no for you, Morand.”
While Trobriand, Friant and Davout were trying out the Italian food, and Morand brooding in a corner, Gudin inspected the cramped and dirty room. Six of them barely fit in it. There were several boxes on the table in front of them, several blades in a box that provided cool air, a pink cake with eyes, amongst other objects. What caught his eye was, however, were the six rectangular pieces of metal with a glass in the middle of them, which were also perfectly placed next to each other.
"Six... How convenient..." Gudin thought to himself. “Oudinot, do you know what those are?” Gudin gestured towards the rectangles.
“I’m not sure what they exactly are. They all just showed me black and white images.” Oudinot replied with food in his mouth, much to the disgust of Gudin.
Morand raised his head.
“Images? What kind?”
Davout, understanding the implication, took out the bulletin from Trobriand’s pouch.
“Were they like this?”
Oudinot looked closely at the bear ‘drawing’.
“No, no. It was more like… thousands of black and white… static horizontal lines.” Oudinot said, looking proud for coming up with a fancy selection of words.
“All six of them?” Friant asked, getting somewhat curious.
“All six of them.”
Trobriand played with his moustache.
“I have an idea… How do you get those static lines to show up?”
Oudinot took one of the objects and flipped it to his head, almost hitting himself.
“Just like that.”
“I see… Everybody, grab one.”
Six of them picked the objects and huddled together in the middle of the room. As expected, black and white lines covered the glass.
“On three. One, two, THREE!”
At Trobriand’s command, all of them flipped the metal pieces to their faces. Almost instantly, a new image appeared! They could see a blue bunny, a brown bear and a yellow chicken.
“Congrats for figuring this out, Trobriand.” Davout praised as he lowered his own piece. The image of animals were replaced with the static lines.
“Wait, flip it again, Monsieur le Maréchal.” Gudin told his Marshal. Davout did so and the animals were back.
Trobriand grinned as a sense of realization hit him.
“Alright, I figured the terminology, I think. I saw some objects on the walls. I assume they’re the ‘cameras’ mentioned in the bulletin. These ones, let’s call ‘em tablets, allow us to see from the view of the cameras.”
“Hmm, makes sense.” Oudinot replied, scratching his black hair.
“If Oudinot could understand it with no problem, then our job is easy.” Friant snarked as he pressed a random square. The animals, or rather the ‘animatronics’, were replaced with an image of what appeared to be a room for cleaning products.
“Ah, another feature. When one selects another camera, it overrides the other five’s view.” Morand commented.
Davout nodded.
“And most importantly, if even one tablet is lowered, cameras go out too.”
Gudin smiled.
“You were right, Monsieur le Maréchal. It is similar to battlefield after all, with all these complex factors.”
“Now all we have to worry about is not getting killed.” Friant said, sounding even sleepier.
“Killed?” Oudinot asked, somewhat shocked.
“Oh right, we forgot to mention it. We’re here for a night shift and the employers don’t care about us getting massacred.” Morand replied with a faux positivity.
“Just a day in the office, then.” Oudinot said, calmed down by Morand’s explanation.
Friant sat down on the floor and leaned towards the wall.
“That’s it, wake up the old man when it is 6AM.”
“You’re not old. You’re not even fifty. Get up. I saw how energetic you were on our march to Austerlitz.” Davout frowned.
Friant began to make fake snoring sounds.
“Remember, all of us are needed for the cameras.”
“Look at this place. Who would try to rob this shithole? There is no danger. And I’m sure you five can handle some ruffians.” Friant replied without opening his eyes.
“But the cameras-“
“You have ears.”
Davout rolled his eyes and sat down in the only chair the room had.
“Gudin, what hour is it?”
“It’s-“
As he was about to answer, one of the boxes opened with the words “12AM” on its glass.
Just a second later, a sound filled the room.
RING RING