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"I don't know why you keep forcing me to come to these stupid events, Mother," standing in an ornately decorated, lavish ballroom, her fiance was complaining to his mother.
"How many times do I have to tell you, darling, that it is an important aspect of societal life for the Lord of the House of Malfoy," Narcissa smiled sweetly at her son, touching the bicep that she was not holding to comfort Draco.
Draco, however, was still disgruntled and as disinterested as ever, not even sparing her a glance. It wasn't that he hated her or something, they were good friends before all of this happened. Before their families decided to renew a dormant contract and force them into an arranged marriage. She liked Draco, had liked him since her fourth year at Hogwarts, but he had always seen her as a friend. She might even be falling in love with the man he was becoming after the war, trying hard to restore his family's dignity and prestige, but she just couldn't do it because she knew he would never reciprocate her love.
Now here she stood, in a party thrown solely for the purpose of celebrating their engagement, with her fiance trying his very best to ignore her and everything around him and her trying her very best to stop herself from falling for a man who had been a lost cause for years. At first, she had thought that things would change once they were out of Hogwarts and he didn't see her everyday. But that was not to be. A whole year had passed since their graduation and he still went out of his way to get a chance to be near her.
She knew he would never be hers and her belief only strengthened when she felt her fiance go rigid all of a sudden. Instantly, the man who had been mentally absent for the last two hours was here again, his face transforming from that of disinterest to one of absolute fascination, an unbridled liveliness to his cold gray eyes. And she knew, without seeing she knew just who had finally made an appearance.
Turning around, she came face to face with her, skin glistening, eyes lit with joy for her friends. She was certainly an angel in this hell and judging by her fiance's expression, he agreed wholeheartedly. Speaking of her fiance, he was not standing with her anymore. He had freed himself as soon as she entered and was rushing to greet her.
Astoria didn't know how Hermione could still miss it. How she failed to guess it for about eight whole years. Did she not see the change of spirits in Draco? Did she miss the obvious skip in his step now that he was on his way to her? Astoria just didn't know! She thought even a blind man could see what Hermione always missed, and to call her the Brightest Witch of the Age.....
Draco was now in front of her, just standing there, looking at her for a span of time that had Astoria worrying that the guests would start noticing. However, he seemed to get a hold of himself and after greeting her with a kiss to her knuckles, offered his arm guiding her towards where Astoria stood. Would someone notice how he didn't greet any other person and then this enthusiastic greeting for one witch? What if it was all over the papers? She couldn't imagine her father's disappointment when he got to know that she had still failed to charm her future husband.
Hermione greeted her with excitement. As far as she and all of their other friends knew, it was a love match. However, none else had bought the lie quite like Hermione did. She never questioned the fact that how two people who were only strictly platonic for seven years in school could suddenly be engaged not even a year later. It made it all the more difficult to share her plight with her. Did she know of Draco's love for her? His absolute adoration? If yes, then did she know how much it bothered Astoria? Did she just not care?
Draco had plucked a glass from the floating trays and offered it to Hermione and by the time Astoria re-emerged from her rumination, they were deep in discussion about something and she had no idea at what point she'd lost them. Hermione was talking quite passionately about some bill she was trying to get passed and Draco listened, rapt, his utterance open and clearly lovesick.
To say that she was in pain was a gross understatement. Maybe she should have said something when her father had decided to renew the contract. She should have been brave enough to refuse. She should have spoken up to protect herself from the pain she knew would come. She had always known, had she not?
She was always there, lurking in a corner. Always present but seen only when someone was looking for her, just like the perfume Hermione always wore. A very faint whiff of cinnamon and vanilla. She had never taken notice of it before Daphne and Pansy had told her it was a scent in Draco's Amortenia. He had always noticed. He always noticed everything about her.
For years she had been a silent spectator to Draco's love story. Always hidden in plain sight, trying to catch the attention of the boy she liked. That's how she had noticed it, the same struggle in Draco but it was for Hermione, not her. The way his eyes would always find her in a room full of people, how they would track her across the Great Hall, tuning in to every one of her movements.
At first, Astoria had really thought it was quite adorable, when she did not have a crush on him that is. She had always thought the blonde was handsome but did not have any specific feelings for him until her father had told her that she was to be wed to him. Even after that, she didn't have the courage to express her feelings for him and so, she always lingered, hidden in plain sight, bearing witness to the blonde's yearning from afar.
It was always there, she thought. She and Daphne used to gossip about it, tittering at the looks the blonde would throw the Gryffindor princess' way. How he would always put on a show for her, though Astoria never thought he would have been able to impress the righteous girl with his bully act.
The day she punched him in the face, he threw a whole fit in the common room. It was a topic of gossip in the dormitory for a full week. The summer after her second year, they formed a tentative friendship that continued well into her third and his fourth year at the school. He found she was a good listener, so he would talk to her often unlike her sister who nitpicked every word he said and would interject often in his rambling and would leave no chance to tease him about things.
His daily ramblings would range from how much he hated the stupid Care of Magical Creatures class to how Moody was an insipid serial killer not suited to teaching at all, to how Saint Potter was a clout chaser putting his name in the Goblet vying for attention, to how he was glad the Weasel had done something praise worthy by leaving the Scarhead's side.
But what took up most of his thoughts and most part of their conversation was her. How he hated her stupid bushy hair and her swotty face and those useless ribbons in her hair that were so gross that they always distracted him with the way they swished and flicked. How he hated every single time her hand was the first one up in the air to answer a question. How he loathed that she always took up his favourite table in the library and he had to take the one on the side and watch her stupid face while studying, look at her bushy hair getting in her face, at Krum throwing her lovelorn looks trying to get her attention. How her constant thrumming fingers on the table disturbed him.
He thought he was putting up a good show of how much he disliked the girl, but Astoria had always been very observant and saw it for what it was. A chance to speak of the girl he loved with someone. She knew he couldn't talk about her to his parents, nor any of his friends who were much more interested in talks of Quidditch and the Tournament. But she had all the time in the world to listen to himself talk because she was shy and didn't talk much, so the few friends she had didn't miss her if she wasn't around.
So there she sat in the common room everyday, listening to him and his woes about the curly haired witch. Always listening to even the unspoken parts, communicated through the poorly concealed yearning in his voice and the omnipresent adoration and reverence in his eyes. She always heard how he would love to be the one sitting next to her and call that table with the best lightning in the library theirs, how he would love to tell off Krum and any other guy who dared look her way, how he would love to tell her how much he loved her. She heard everything and she was content to keep hearing it, wishing with all her heart that this boy whom she considered her best friend could somehow get to be with the girl he loved so dearly.
However, the summer after her third year was the one when everything changed and she was forced to step out of her happy bubble. It was about a week after she had returned home, still traumatized from the sudden death of a student that her father had called her in his study informing her that she was to be wed to the Malfoy heir after she graduated. It was like the world had collapsed around her. Imagine hearing that your future husband would be a man you knew to be so much in love with another woman that you stood no chance.
But she was just a girl and the prospect of having him as her husband had made it very easy to fall for him. She hadn't even known when it had crept up on her. During the many trips and hangouts Daphne arranged with her group of friends or when they were sat in the common room after returning to Hogwarts, she didn't know. All she knew was that the acknowledgement she had that Draco was a good looking guy like she acknowledged Theo, Potter, and Ernie McMillan and even Oliver Wood to be was somehow changed to Draco being the best of all. Before she knew it, she was nursing a full-fledged crush on him. She couldn't help it.
Their sessions by the common room fire continued and by the way he was still prattling on about Granger this and Granger that, she had a sneaking suspicion that he did not know of the marriage contract. She didn't have the heart to tell him either. Neither did she have the heart to tell him of her feelings and to tell him to stop talking to her about Granger. And so she stood by, quietly, watching and listening to him fall more and more for the girl.
She knew he wore a SPEW badge hidden underneath his robes everyday. She knew he kept a secret collection of the poorly knit clothing articles she left around the school for the elves, stashed securely at the bottom of his trunk. She knew he kept the coins she had designed for Dumbledore's Army in a drawer in his study. She knew he always kept the periwinkle ribbon she had worn to the Yule Ball in his pocket.
She had tried, tried her very best to not let it get to her.But it had slowly taken over her whole life. Granger, the Gryffindor princess. The woman her future husband would always pine over. She wondered whether Draco would get over it.
Daphne and Pansy had assured her that he would. That he knew there was no way Granger could ever be his. Even if his father allowed it, she would never accept his love and that Astoria's love would make him forget all about Granger in no time. In fact, Pansy bet that once they were out of Hogwarts, it wouldn't take more than a few months for Draco to forget her. He was whimsical like that, Pansy said but deep down Astoria knew that harbouring such strong feelings for a girl you had not even had a proper conversation with was no whim. And this was a sweet torture she was willingly bearing in hopes that it would end one day.
There were times over the years when she was resolute to march up to her father and end it but she was also selfish and wanted Draco to herself even if she could never have his heart to herself.
When she came back for her fifth year at Hogwarts, Draco had changed. They knew that a war was looming over their heads, draping its claws around their throats. But Draco seemed broken and destroyed. He did not talk to anyone. Astoria noticed him looking at Granger in the Great Hall during meals, but now his eyes held a pain along with that deep yearning love that had always been there.
However, that cautious hope that told Astoria that Draco still hoped to get Granger to be his one day, was lost, dimmed into inexistence. That's when Astoria knew something was very, very wrong. This was not the Draco she knew. Her Draco had always expected that he would get Granger to accept his love some day. This Draco, on the other hand, seemed to have resigned himself to some terrible fate. Had he found out about their engagement?
She cornered him in the common room long after everyone else had gone to bed and tried to get the truth out of him but he was shut up like a clam. However, after much pestering that involved some pleading and some emotional blackmailing on her part, he finally broke down and the truth shattered her as well.
He had been recruited into Voldemort's army. He had to do it to save his mother's life. He was a Death Eater now. He said that his life was destroyed and whether the Dark Lord won the war or lost, it didn't matter for him because no one will ever love him now. She knew without a doubt who this 'No one' was and her heart broke for him knowing that his words held some measure of truth to them.
The war raged on and swept all of their lives and their peace with it. It had also earned her a new reputation among her friends. Though most of them were scared of the Carrow twins and did their bidding, she didn't. She stood up to them, refusing to torture her fellows. She was punished for it in turn but the pain was nothing compared to the guilt she would have felt if she listened to them. Draco was there to help her through the pain though, just like he helped other students as much as he could.
Being a Death Eater, he couldn't refuse the Carrows as he was accountable to Voldemort himself. But that did not stop him from helping the poor students to the best of his abilities. He would put his skill in potions to use providing pain relief potions, energising potions and iterations of the Pepper-Up Potion that helped the students recover after the bouts of torture they endured. He was also very lenient in his spells when he was asked to perform the Cruciatus on other students.
As for her, her bold resistance had ensued in the belief among her fellows that were she not a Greengrass, she would have certainly been sorted into Gryffindor. Her friendship with Draco had also been rekindled to some extent though limited to stilted conversations only.
As far as the engagement was concerned, her father wished to stay neutral in the war, thus he did not want any association with Death Eaters and had called off the engagement. The two of them were now a pair of pining fools. Him being content yearning for Granger whose whereabouts were not known for about a year and her satisfied with hiding her real feelings from him.
This continued on after the war as the students who wished to repeat the year because of poor education during the war were given an opportunity to do so. Astoria chose to continue to her seventh year instead of repeating her sixth.
Most of the seventh years came back as it was important to take their NEWTS. This included Daphne, Pansy, Theo, Blaise and most of her other friends. The Golden Trio came back as well. Draco, on the other hand, was necessitated to return as part of his probation. He was saved from Azkaban because many of the students had spoken in his favour, retelling how he had done all he could to help them. The Golden Trio had also cited how he had not identified them deliberately when they were captured and taken to his house, thus saving their lives. Potter also told the Wizengamot how Draco had willingly relinquished his wand to him so that he could save Hermione.
If only Potter knew the whole extent of Draco's motives. If only Granger knew.
The returning students had chosen to put their differences aside after the war. This brought a whole another onslaught of torture for Astoria. Draco had taken to the idea almost instantly, placing all of his efforts in befriending and impressing Hermione. He had apologized profusely to everyone he had wronged and the selfless Gryffindors were quick to forgive and surprisingly, even quicker to forget. Gone were the days when Slytherin and Gryffindor were at each other's throats. Now all one could see were friendships that were growing stronger every passing day.
The strongest of them all was however the one people had least expected. The Head Girl and the Head Boy of Hogwarts could often be seen roaming the halls together. The Head Boy carrying the Head Girl's tower of books for her , her bag slung across his shoulder, both immersed in some deep discussion, the ribbons in the Head Girl's hair swishing around whenever she would turn her head excitedly towards the Head Boy, eager to listen to whatever he had to tell.
They were always sharing that table, Draco's favourite table, in the library. They had even taken to sitting together at the meals, poring over Potions notes or discussing some new Muggle book that she had suggested to him
Of course Hermione was the Head Girl, it was no shocker. But what was a surprise was the Head Boy, Draco Malfoy, ex-death eater. Turns out, McGonagall had seen him and his efforts last year and all of this had softened the witch to such an extent that it was obvious to any onlookers how much of a soft spot their principal had for the blonde.
Knowing Hermione was like a punch to her gut. She was all that she had gathered from Draco's point of view and even more and she was gutted to know that the visions of the girl she had seen in Draco's eyes were not just the ramblings of a love sick boy but the truth. She was truly what Astoria would call the girl of Draco's dreams.
She was smart and beautiful and so very kind. Astoria felt like she was nothing in comparison. Whenever Hermione paid her a compliment, it felt like a bullet on her skin. Knowing she would never be able to live up to the girl who had the love of her life wrapped around her fingers like the ribbons wrapped around her hair pained her.
True to her name, she was golden. A dazzling starlet. She was a perfect mix of all the beautiful things to ever exist. The greatest torture one could ever bare. Astoria couldn't help but be envious. She was only human, after all. There would be a jealous twinge in her heart whenever she saw Draco orbiting around Hermione like she was the sun. And perhaps she was, in Draco's world. The sun and the moon and the stars and everything else that he held dear.
She couldn't help that her stomach ended up in knots, like the ones on Hermione's ribbons, whenever she thought of the fact that Granger had the one thing, the one person, that Astoria wanted. She had Draco's love. She had Draco.
Many a time, she thought to just tell Granger to stay away from Draco, but how could she. She had no claim on him. He wasn't her betrothed anymore. Except, then he was. Once again. Her betrothed. In love with Hermione Granger still.
She was still a coward when it came to telling him and his parents were still as conniving, keeping it from him until he was out of Hogwarts and back home. So she watched the dance he did around Granger. Too eager to reach out and have her, but too scared of her rejection to actually accept to his love. He had told Theo that he didn't want to be rejected by her. That he was sure she would never accept his love and that he didn't have the heart to live with her rejection. So he was content to be her friend. Maybe he could get her to fall for him one day. But he didn't know that he had a responsibility and a betrothed waiting for him.
Astoria for her part, kept repeating the conversation she had with Daphne and Pansy like a mantra to herself. She tried to reason with herself that people are just people. There are many people in this world who fall in love with someone but fail to get them. Then they move on and fall in love with someone else. She told herself that this is what would happen. They would be out of Hogwarts, busy in their own lives, moving after their own goals and Draco would forget all about Granger and his love for her. That he would see one day how much Astoria loved him and would reciprocate her love. But the more she got to know Hermione, the more she knew it all to be a useless consolation she was giving herself.
Perhaps it would have been possible if there never had been a redo of their last school year and Draco had never gotten to know Granger as much as he did now. Because that girl was something special. It was as if she was made of angel dust and she knew, in her heart of hearts that Draco Malfoy would never forget Hermione Granger, but she was selfish and couldn't bring herself to leave her hopes behind.
Just like she had thought, an end to Hogwarts was not an end to Draco and Hermione's friendship, nor was it an end to Draco's feelings. Whenever their friends group would meet up at the weekends, he could always be seen by her side. A constant. Draco and Hermione. He had even taken up a job in the ministry right in her department when everyone knew very well that he had no need to work.
She registered, quite alarmingly, that the tentative hope she had seen in fifteen year old Draco's eyes was slowly coming back. It was there in the way he would easily sling his arm around her shoulder or compliment her smoothly. It was there in the way he wasn't scared of staking his claim on her.
At Hogwarts, he would blend into the shadows whenever Potter or Weasley or any other friend of hers would want to engage in conversation with her but now, no matter how important her conversation with another person was, he would lurk right beside her, waiting for it to end and also giving anyone engaging with her a clear signal that all her free time was his to be occupied. He had even done something Astoria never thought he would.
It was during one of their weekly hangouts that a bloke had been hitting on Granger at the pub. Despite her being very obvious about not wanting any of his attentions, the fellow just wasn't ready to give up. That's when Draco, her fiance who was still oblivious to this relation, had interjected. Placing his arm around her waist, he had looked at the bloke with such intensity that the poor guy had actually visibly cowered. Granger, bless her, had played along easily. Still blissfully unaware of Draco's feelings and considering the gesture a favour one friend had done to get another out of an inconvenient situation. How she could miss the territorial glint in his eyes, Astoria had no idea. How she could consider his possessive grip around her an act, Astoria couldn't fathom. What she did know however was the jealous pang in her heart.Although she knew Hermione was unaware of the whole predicament, she still couldn't help but wonder if she had unknowingly wronged the witch and now she was out to get her.
Draco still didn't know of the betrothal. With Lucius in Azkaban, Narcissa insisted that she wanted to give her son some time for himself before getting him married. Astoria suspected that Narcissa knew of Draco's interests, she was his mother after all, but she couldn't do anything about it as her father had the power to cancel the contract.
Astoria, for her part, couldn't help the seething jealousy in her wretched heart. All her hopes of Draco getting over Hermione had been dashed to smithereens. Now she had the additional concern of Draco actually pursuing Hermione. Amidst all this, she couldn't help but wonder of she would ever be able to live happily with him?
About ten months after their graduation, she had finally called up every dredge of the mythical Gryffindor courage that she was rumoured to possess and had voiced her concerns to her father. Alfred Greengrass had always been a doting and lenient father contrary to how most pureblooded parents were. Still Astoria had waited this long for fear of disappointing her father. He had informed her years ago of the betrothal and had expected her to have won the Malfoy heir's heart and she was loathe to admit that she had failed miserably at the aforementioned task. Her father, however, had taken the news quite differently than she had expected. Rather than being dismayed in her, he had been furious at Draco on her behalf. He had assured her that Draco would never be able to leave her and get out of this betrothal and that she should rest assured. But wouldn't forcing Draco into a marriage with her cancel any slim chance she has of winning him over?
But the traitorous part of her heart, the one that had always considered Hermione the other woman and had, despite everything, never left the hope of having Draco all to herself convinced her that he would come round eventually. It lulled her into a false calm, the insipid belief that her and Draco were meant to be. She couldn't help it. She was torn inside. She knew Draco's feelings for Hermione were irrefutable. Still she let that dark part of her reign.She had always been indecisive like that. That was her fatal flaw. And it had led her into a big mess.
Draco had been furious when he was informed of the contract by Narcissa. The announcement in The Prophet was promptly followed by the engagement party she currently stood at. Draco had not spoken a word to her since. In fact, he had been on the verge of an outburst until she had arrived and Astoria had no choice but to watch, like she always had, as he kept falling more and more in love with Hermione, bewitched by the royal blue ribbons in her hair.
She could spy some of the more observant guests throwing pitiful looks her way. She saw her sister from the corner of her eye, giving her a gloomy look. Daphne had warned her during their last school year to let go of any hopes as Draco was in too deep. That she had underestimated his feelings the last time and wouldn't let Astoria do that now. But Astoria had been too occupied by the conflict within her to heed Daphne's cautions.
However, now she knew what to do. She had to ask Draco to stop it once and for all. She couldn't very well stand next to him at the aisle while he pined away in another witch's love. Or, she had to get her father to stop all of this madness. The choice was hers to make.
After the party was over and the two families were sat in the parlour of Malfoy Manor, Draco excused himself but before he could leave her mother had suggested she accompany him. The look that passed between her parents told her it was planned. They knew she had to talk to Draco after what had transpired today.
After strolling quietly for a few minutes, she couldn't help herself any longer. She grabbed hold of his bicep to stop him from moving any further.
"Why won't you talk to me, hmm?" she seethed. "You even ignored me at our engagement party, Draco! It's because of her, isn't it? Hermione?"
"Stop dragging her into this," he gritted out.
"I'm dragging her into this? Me?" she was on the verge of tears now. "You're the one who's dragging her into this Draco Malfoy! You're the one who's desperately in love with her!"
"So you know, huh?" he sneered.
"As if it is hard to miss."
"Then, may I have the pleasure of knowing what was the need for all this? If you knew I was already another woman's, what was the point of acting like a snake? Hiding the truth of this fucking betrothal from me! You knew and still you let me get my hopes up, let me fall harder and harder when you had already planned my heartbreak, scheming with your father!"
He was furious but she had to let him hear her out. So she soldiered on. "I never said anything because I had hopes of my own, Draco," she whispered.
"I remained quiet baring witness to your love and still hoping I could somehow win you over because you are not another woman's. You are not any woman's, yet and you know it. In spite of your love for Hermione, you are not hers and she is not yours."
"So that gives you the right to manipulate me? It gives you free reign to act as my friend while secretly you were in on a scheme that you knew would bring me nothing but pain? I considered you a very close friend, Astoria... Why did you do this to me?" he whispered that last part, bowed over one of the chairs in the garden, eyes bloodshot. And her heart broke witnessing it. She took a careful step towards him.
Placing a tentative hand on his shoulder, she carried on . "I know I hurt you and broke your trust, Draco, but believe me, it was never my intention. I was.... I was scared and conflicted and confused and selfish. I did not want to disappoint Father, I did not want to make you suffer and I also did not want to suffer a heartbreak myself.... I was stupid! I... I tricked myself into believing that I could win you over.... That you would grow to love me someday. Deep down I always knew it would never happen, but you know... I couldn't bring myself to give up on you, just like you couldn't give up on her..."she said, her back to him so he wouldn't see the tears falling freely now.
For a long moment, he said nothing and she wondered if her envy and selfishness had caused her to lose her very first true friend. Even though she had went astray at some point, she had made peace with the prospect of a life without Draco as her lover long ago. Long before the selfishness and jealousy had made a home in her heart. So once she let go of those sentiments, it was very easy to make peace with it once more. But she couldn't, for the life of her imagine a world where Draco Malfoy was not her friend, where he didn't rant to her and she did not share her deepest secrets with him. She will never forgive herself if her folly had just set that very world's making into existence.
"I'm sorry."
The softly spoken words break her stupor.
"Wh_ what did you say?"
"I'm sorry, Tory," he muttered. "I really am. For the way I lashed out at you, for the way I've unknowingly broken your heart and hurt you so many times over the years. But.... Trust me, I can't help it! She's the only girl there ever has been. I've never known another love and I don't think I ever could. She's always been it for me. The only witch and I know it pains you to hear it, to have witnessed it all these years, but I can't help it and I could never give you the love you deserve, the adoration you ought to have from your betrothed and... And I'm sorry. I'm just so sorry..."
"You don't have to be, Draco," she turned around to face him again, wiping the tear streaks off her cheeks. "You never knew of my feelings or our betrothal so you can't be held responsible for my pain. I brought this upon myself. It's like... It's like I knew the outcome and still hurtled on without a care in the world. In my heart, I always knew she was the only love you'd ever know. So I'm sorry to myself and I'm sorry to you that I let this continue for so long. I should have accepted this long ago. And I had, but still I somehow got caught up in it again. But I swear, today was the day I had finally decided to break through.... I brought it up because I wanted to get it clear to me once and for all that you will never be mine. I just wanted to hear it from you, just to be sure," she chuckled, shaking her head at her own stupidity.
"Don't worry about the contract and everything, Draco. I will get it straight to my father that if he wants to see me happy, he will have to cancel that contract. I promise."
He only nodded, hands pushed in his pockets.
She felt so much lighter now that she knew she wasn't dooming both of them to a loveless marriage. That she wasn't forcing Draco into anything. That she wasn't forcing herself into believing all the lies that she had told herself for so long. It felt refreshing and freeing to acknowledge that the two of them had always meant to be friends. Which reminds her....
"Draco."
"Hmmm..."
"All this won't affect our friendship, right? I mean... I would still like for us to be friends just the way we were before," she whispered, too scared of his refusal to look him in the eye.
He stepped forward and enveloped her in a warm hug, shocking her to the bone.
"Of course we'll still be friends. We always will be."
The companionable silence in which they sat afterwards, her head placed lightly on his shoulder, was pleasant. She had returned the Malfoy heirloom he had reluctantly slipped on her finger a month ago to him. It had felt like taking tons of load off her shoulders.
"I'm tired. Maybe we should go inside?" Draco asked her.
"We could if you want to," she told him. "But why don't you talk to me like you used to, at Hogwarts," she proposed.
"What do you want me to talk about?"
"Talk about Hermione."
He looked at her as if he expected her to have grown two heads. However, something about the calm smile on her face must have convinced him of the fact that she was genuinely curious and that she was beyond the stage where hearing about his love would cause her pain, because he smiled and nodded.
"Speak the truth this time, though. I don't want the modified version in which hate is a substitute for love and almost every word and feeling you talk about has the opposite meaning," she teased.
He just chuckled shyly at that. Then, a deep breath.
"When you started liking me, it was after the confirmation that we were to be wed, right? A natural attraction one would feel for the person they know they have to spend their life with," he said, looking at her and she nodded because that was the very essence of her feelings for him and he had seen right through her, as always.
"But do you know how it feels when you're falling in love with someone you can't have?" he looked up, towards the sky, an easy smile on his face.
"It feels like jumping off a cliff willingly with a rope tied to your waist. Falling too fast but you know you won't hit the land. The fall thrills your heart, numbs you to nothingness. Not wanting to climb back up and unable to make it to the valley," he sighed then, a content little sound. "I'd call that helplessly in love. That's how I love Granger."
She smiled knowing that she had made the correct decision to free him of any obligations to her.
"You know," he continued without any care in the world, and she was reminded of their Hogwarts days when he would keep talking for hours and she would keep listening. She had thought that that connection was lost, but it wasn't. In fact, it was back full swing once their forced connection was severed.
"One day you'll find someone like that. You're a very special girl, Astoria and I feel it in my heart that you will get to experience the beauty of loving and being loved. There will be someone whose whole world would revolve around you. Who'll only see you. Only you. No other love." She just nodded along dumbly, somehow the idea of falling in love without any safety nets like there were with Draco scared her. She didn't think she could ever, but she didn't tell him that. Instead she let him speak his heart out. She let him express his love for Hermione in a way he had never before.
That night, he talked for hours about Hermione and she got to actually see Hermione Granger despite having known the witch for almost eight years and being a close friend of hers for about two. She learned what Hermione's favourite colour was, her favourite book, the places she wanted to visit, the things she wanted to experience in her life.
She also learned things she had not expected. Like how Hermione wanted to be in Ravenclaw and her second preference was actually Slytherin and although she knew most evil wizards were Slytherins, she had always considered herself more of a thinker than a doer and thought that she could put her cunning to good use in the house.
How he loved the ribbons swishing in her hair, her passion and fervour, the constant drumming of her fingers when she's in thought, the way she pouts and bites her lip when she's uncertain or nervous, the way she manages to be so devoted and committed to the things and people she cares about. How he just loves her. All of her.
That night as she saw Hermione Granger from the eyes of Draco Malfoy, her belief that she had made the right choice strengthened.
Thankfully, their engagement and the contract were dissolved on a friendly note. There was no bad blood between the two families and the dynamics of their friends group also remained intact.
For a month, she stood by and saw Draco dancing around Hermione. It was back to what it was before their engagement was announced. Lunch with Hermione at the Ministry, browsing book shops with her, kissing her knuckles as a form of greeting, walking her to fireplaces during their hangouts, that territorial hold whenever any bloke so much as tried to look at her. But Hermione was still under the impression that it was just what he would do for any of his friends, still unaware of his feelings because he had not confessed them and it was driving Astoria up the wall.
She had not been on the front row seat of Draco's love story for him to ruin his chances by putting off his inevitable confession. Why did he not understand that if he did not make a move soon, someone else would. She had to do something about it and so she set up a plan in motion recruiting Theo, Ginny, Pansy and even Narcissa to help her with it.
It was a week before the Annual Gala at the Ministry. They were all gathered in their favourite pub for drinks. She knew that Draco obviously did not have a date. Ginny had told her that Hermione did not, as well. McLaggen and another bloke at the Ministry had asked her but she had rejected both.
She knew exactly what to do. She prodded Theo, sitting right next to her and nodded towards Draco and Hermione.
"Say, Draco," Theo drawled. "Did you hear about the upcoming Gala to celebrate Scarhead's legendary victory against Snakeface?"
"Hey! Don't call me that," Potter protested but Theo was a man on a mission and paid him no mind, his stare fixed on Draco.
"Of course I did, Theodore. I worked on it."
"Right. So.... Who are you taking?"
"Where?"
"To hell!" Theo huffed, banging his head on the table. "Are you taking stupidity classes from the Weasel mate?" Thank goodness that Ronald was busy and had been unable to attend today or else there would have been a whole new argument to settle. All of them were quite accustomed to Theo's blunt and sarcastic manner, well all except Ronald who still got rankled from time to time.
"I'm sure Theo here is talking about the Gala, mate," Blaise chimed in. "Who is your date to the Gala."
Draco's eyes flickered so quickly to Hermione that Astoria might have missed if she wasn't paying such close attention to him.
"No one," he muttered.
"My, Drakey! Don't tell me you're not so eligible anymore?" Theo cooed.
"Shut up, Nott!" Draco grumbled. "It's because I didn't ask anyone. I might not attend the Gala."
"What do you mean you might not?" Granger piped in, taking a break from Pansy who was trying to convince her yet again to model for her fashion line. "You do realize how bad of an impression it would give if one of the people responsible for organising the Gala did not attend, right?"
"I know, Granger," he retorted. "And might I remind you that I only took up the task to keep you company and give you a respite from all those buffoons on the team."
"Sure it was just that," Ginny muttered.
"What was that, Red?" Draco inquired, turning his scrutiny on Ginny.
"All I said is that you could come for the very reason you organised, you know, to be Hermione's knight in custom-made robes," she winked and Hermione pinked remarkably.
Interesting.
"She also doesn't have a date to the Gala so why don't you take her?"
"That's a wonderful idea, Gin," Potter interjected. "I bet she'll not get bored with you on her side, mate." He added to Draco.
"That's amazing!" It was Pansy who shared her enthusiasm about the whole situation next. "You can be Draco's date and I could dress you up. I'm offering to do your hair and make-up, as well. Please, Mione. Please, please, please..." Pansy said, doing her best take at puppy eyes.
"All right. Fine," Hermione said. "But only if Draco has no problem attending."
"Not at all," Draco replied, a bit too fast for his liking perhaps because he then proceeded to clear his throat and said, "I mean... You were right about it not looking good for the team if I didn't come. So, yeah. I'll come."
Mission accomplished.
Over the week leading to the Gala, Astoria deduced that Draco was not the only one who was lovestruck. In fact, Hermione was in quite as deep. She confided in Astoria that she had fallen for Draco during their last year at Hogwarts.
The witch was a nervous wreck about her upcoming date with him. Astoria for her part did not tell Hermione of Draco's feelings. It was his secret to tell. She did, however tell Hermione's to Narcissa who was over the moon at the prospect of her son finally getting the happiness he deserves.
Astoria and Pansy convinced Granger to dress in Draco's colours as they were sure it would have a big effect on him. The emerald green dress Pansy had designed for her was gorgeous and Narcissa had even sent a pair of emerald earrings to go with the dress. Pansy tamed Hermione's curls but let them fall loosely around her shoulders. All in all, she looked every bit an angel and Astoria was sure Draco would either drop dead at the sight of her or finally make a move and given how much of a lovestruck sap he was, there was a fifty-fifty chance.
Now for the last nail in the coffin.
Astoria brought in green ribbons and handed them to Pansy at the last minute.
At Hermione's quizzical look, she added,"Draco loves these ribbons, you know. Always told me they distract him," she winked at a wide-eyed Hermione.
Her plan was a blasting success. Draco was bewitched the moment Hermione entered the room and they spent the time in each other's arms. She was sure they would be inseparable now. It was there in the way Draco whispered something to her on the dance floor and her shy smile in return, his hand splayed on her lower back, tucking her curls behind her ear, guiding her to the fireplace, their fingers intertwined.
Perfect.
And when, a year later, Draco proposed and Hermione later showed them the ring and the periwinkle ribbon it came tied up with narrating the story of the ribbon to them, Astoria knew that she had made the right decision.
Another six months later had Astoria decorating Hermione's hair with white ribbons and delicate flowers. It only strengthened her belief and increased her satisfaction.
As for herself, Draco had been right. She did find love in the most unlikely place with the person she never imagined herself falling in love with. But he was just what Draco had said he would be. She was the center of his universe and after falling for him, Astoria did not ever resent Hermione. Because she had realised that it was not about being more pretty or more smart or more angelic, it was about being with the right person and she had spent years looking for things with the wrong one.
Her boyfriend was her number one supporter. He always was. She was the greatest thing in his world. She had him wrapped around her fingers like the ribbons in Hermione's hair.
When she ended her long and quite emotional speech at Draco and Hermione's wedding to a huge round of applause, one person's cheering could be heard over all the others. Like it always happened for her, the loudest cheers came from Theodore Nott.