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To follow the Path of the Trailblaze, one must be willing to step into the unknown. The Nameless travel far and wide across the galaxy to venture into the abyss and uncover the secrets hidden within. Yet, even while knowing what being a Nameless entailed, it did not stop Jingliu from being upset whenever Baiheng left the Xianzhou Alliance to travel. However, even if she disliked the empty days when Baiheng was not by her side, Jingliu would never tell Baiheng to stop being a Nameless.
The stars called out to those who walked the Path of the Trailblaze, singing songs of adventures and regaling tales of discovery and wonder. Baiheng was no different. She never stopped travelling, only ever pausing to return to her friends and family, to return to Jingliu’s side before the stars called out to her again.
“Baiheng, must you go?” Jingliu whined, her arms wrapped around her lover’s waist and her face tinged red from the alcohol she drank.
Her lover laughed as she set down her cup of wine to pull Jingliu up from where she rested. “I may go where the stars call, but I will always return here, where you are.”
The worst part about waiting, in Jingliu’s opinion, was how agonisingly slow time was. Days would crawl at a snail’s pace as she counted the seconds down till Baiheng’s return. She could fill the emptiness with training and sparring but her mind would soon drift off as her heart yearned for Baiheng’s presence. If only she could call for Baiheng as the stars did, then perhaps Baiheng would never leave. Yet, her voice could not reach her lover’s ears, not when the call of the unknown was far more alluring than anything she could ever be.
“You could come with me,” Baiheng said as she leaned against Jingliu, only to pull away less than a minute later, to which Jingliu quickly found herself missing her lover’s warmth. “But I know you wouldn’t because the stars will never call your name, not when you swore an oath as a Cloud Knight.”
“I don’t need the stars to follow you.”
“Then what will you do when I travel beyond the stars? What will you do when I answer their call and never return?”
“Then I will open a path to where you are. I will cut down even the stars in the sky and follow you.”
She would spend most days moping. Not even sparring with Dan Feng nor teaching Jing Yuan a new move could lift her mood. Her sword longed to clash with other blades but Jingliu longed for other things.
She wanted to feel her lover’s touch as she wrapped her hands around her waist, to hear her lover’s voice as she called her name, to see her lover’s eyes as they matched each other’s gaze. Yet, Baiheng remained far out of her reach, far out of her hearing, and far out of her sight. Jingliu could reach out to the stars that shimmered in the sky above but her fingers would never graze her lover’s skin.
“Don’t go where I can’t follow. Don’t go where I can’t reach you,” Jingliu said as she embraced Baiheng, the latter already prepared to leave for her next trailblazing adventure.
Baiheng reciprocated the hug and placed a kiss on Jingliu’s cheek. “Even if I’m not here, I’d still be soaring among the stars. So reach out to touch them, and when you do, know that I’ll do the same.”
(When the starskiff disappeared into the sea of stars far beyond her, Jingliu reached out and pretended she could touch it.)
There were times Jingliu dreamt of traversing the expanses of the skies by Baiheng’s side, to be seated in the same starskiff with her lover and pass by a limitless ocean of stars as they conquered the unknown. Jingliu would dream of worlds she never saw, of skies with stars she never touched, and when she woke up alone in her bed with only her swords for company, her heart yearned for the Foxian who left her side. She was bound to an oath, shackled to the land beneath her feet, and she could only watch as Baiheng flew further away from her.
(If she reached out to touch the stars, would she feel her lover’s touch in return?)
Though Jingliu was unable to soar the skies with her lover, Baiheng always brought back a piece of her adventure to her lover. A pressed flower from a world of fauna no one had seen before, a photo of rainbows etched into stone, a bottle of the sweet nectar from a world lightyears away. Everything that Baiheng brought back to Jingliu, anything that could be kept, Jingliu would store them carefully, locked away securely where only she would find them. When she felt lonely without Baiheng by her side, Jingliu would take out the souvenirs and caress each one as though she could feel her lover’s warmth through them.
When the High-Cloud Quintet was called upon to fight in the war against the Abundance, in a moment of selfishness, Jingliu asked Baiheng to stay behind. Yet, her lover laughed and told her, “I won’t let you march alone.”
There was a saying that luck favoured the bold. Baiheng was lucky, the luckiest in all of Xianzhou. Jingliu had seen Baiheng’s death defying feats, stunts that would kill any pilot who hesitated in the face of danger. The Foxian would always emerge unscathed, even if it would send Jingliu into a panicked fit if she ever caught sight of them. Luck, many claimed it when Baiheng defied all expectations and conquered the impossible. Luck, the other members of the High-Cloud Quintet claimed it when Baiheng won every bet she made against them.
Then, where was the luck that saved her life when she crashed her starskiff and climbed out of the wreckage without a single scratch? Where was the luck when she bested everyone in the card games she loved to play? Where was the luck if all that remained of her was the blood splattered on the ground?
Where did it all go wrong?
Jingliu had been at the front, cleaving a path with her sword. Dan Feng was by her side, cloudhymn magic at his fingertips as he unleashed heavenly destruction upon the abominations. Jing Yuan led the army, letting lightning rain down upon his foes. Yingxing stayed at the back, repairing weapons as quickly as he could. Baiheng had taken to the skies where her skills were most needed, where starskiff after starskiff crashed and burned while hers soared past them.
Jingliu had kept an eye on Baiheng’s starskiff whenever she could afford to pull her attention away from the battle. Yet, as she neared the Emanantor of Abundance leading the army, she could no longer tear her gaze away from the conflict unravelling in front of her. A loud roar echoed in the air as Dan Feng clashed with the Emanantor. The ground rumbled beneath Jingliu’s feet as two forces of power collided. Dan Feng continued to push the Emanator back, yet in doing so, the rest of the Abundance abominations slowly surrounded him. Jingliu knew she needed to get to her friend but even with the strength of a thousand armies, she was unable to cleave a path through.
Dan Feng roared again, anger and pain evident in his voice, yet he remained alone and overpowered by the enemy. Jingliu screamed in desperation, unwilling to see a close friend perish in front of her, but she struggled to reach his side.
The Emanator held a blade above the dragon’s head, insanity reflected in those mara-struck eyes, and Jingliu could not pull her gaze away from the scene. That was until a lone starskiff crashed between the two, forcing the Emanator of Abundance to back away. Baiheng emerged from the wreckage and Jingliu was forcefully pulled away from the scene when an abomination attacked her. Her blade found its mark at the monster’s neck but another one took its place. She returned to the battle even as every fibre of her body demanded to rush to Baiheng’s side.
Dan Feng would protect her, she trusted him.
The battle only ended once a bright light engulfed the entire battlefield. The abominations were annihilated, burnt into ashes which were scattered by the wind, finally revealing the devastation left scarred upon the land. Countless bodies of the Xianzhou knights lay fallen beneath those who lived and Jingliu stood surrounded by ashes. There would be time to collect what remained and time for grief, so Jingliu turned her gaze to where Dan Feng and Baiheng were, but where was Baiheng? Where was her lover?
Dan Feng was kneeling on the ground, his draconic form breaking away, and his eyes remained fixated on the pool of red in front of him. She dragged her feet to where Dan Feng was, her beloved swords clattering to the ground as her hands lost the strength to wield them. She walked — stumbled — to where red stained the ground and a single tuft of hair that lay atop it.
“Baiheng…?” Jingliu uttered, disbelief like a shroud trying to hide the truth from her eyes. Her lover’s name fell out of her lips again, over and over until an epiphany cleared her mind. Jingliu fell to her knees and the tears followed soon after. She wanted to reach out to grasp what remained of her lover, but the strength she was once so proud of failed her and the limb fell back by her side. “Baiheng… Why…? I told you not to go where I can’t follow…”
Time passed by in a blur. There was much to do in the aftermath of the battle. Bodies had to be sent off, families to be consoled, and life must move on.
For the High-Cloud Quintet, a sombre air had descended upon the group. Jing Yuan was left to deal with the clean up, the politics, and words of thanks for those who fell. Yingxing grieved for Baiheng but he moved on eventually, soon accepting the fate befallen upon his friend. Dan Feng, having blamed himself for Baiheng’s death, stayed away from Jingliu in his shame.
Jingliu was yet to move on from Baiheng’s death. She would go to places where Baiheng used to frequent, to let the memories of her lover be her eternal torment. She had attended the soul-soothing ceremony for Baiheng but there was no peace to be found, not when they had no option but to send off an empty starskiff of only her belongings, not when there was no body to say goodbye to.
Jingliu often found herself staring up at the stars in the sky, often wondering if Baiheng wandered among them as she promised. She reached out, pretending that she could touch the stars, pretending that her lover was reaching out and doing the same on the other side. Even then, her fingers remained cold and her heart continued to miss the warmth of the lover who left her behind.
“Baiheng, where did you go?” Jingliu asked as her hand fell back down to her side. “I’ve reached out to touch the stars, but I can’t feel your touch anymore.”
There was nothing that could lift up Jingliu’s mood. Not swordplay, not sparring, not the wine that Baiheng left behind. Not even Jing Yuan was able to lift his mentor’s mood. Jingliu would spend her time outside Baiheng’s home, drinking from dusk till dawn, until the stars reappeared in the sky, then she would weep as she reached out to them.
What would Baiheng say if she saw you like this? Many people said as they scolded her. She laughed as her response, laughing even after they left, laughing until she cried. “I don’t know, she’s not here anymore,” she would say once her tears finally ran dry.
Jingliu knew that she was destroying her life with each passing day, yet she could not bring herself to care. She barely ate and drank, barely kept herself alive, and barely lived her life. She still wielded her sword, practising and swinging the blade, going through the motions of her dull life day by day, even if she barely remembered what she did. Repetition created routine and through routine, she could stop herself from falling further into despair even if her mind could not process what she was doing. It was a terrible way to live and Jingliu knew that she was wasting away the life Baiheng had taught her to cherish, but she did not know any other way to live without her lover nor did she want to move on just yet.
Her routine was broken when a terrifying anguished roar shattered the peace in Xianzhou Luofu. Jingliu had moved before she could figure out why the roar sounded agonising or why it resonated so familiarly with her. When she arrived at Scalegorge Waterscape, she was caught off-guard by the sight of a monstrous dragon, an abomination of Abundance, possessing a familiar aura. The dragon roared again, its voice pained, and Jingliu could only stare at the monster in horror.
“Baiheng…?”
What had Dan Feng done? What did he do?
Jingliu found Dan Feng kneeling on the ground, staring at the monster he created. Yingxing lay on the ground a distance away, mara-struck, but Jingliu could not bring herself to care for the friends who betrayed her trust.
Was it her fault for withdrawing from her friends after Baiheng died? Was it her fault that she never realised how much her friends had hurt after Baiheng’s death? Was it her fault that Baiheng was crying out in pain?
The dragon roared again, anguished, and the memory of Baiheng laughing without a care in the world graced her mind. There was no one else who could do this, no one else who could end this torment apart from her.
Jingliu stepped in front of Dan Feng and the High Elder raised his head to meet her eyes. She should have killed him for what he had done to Baiheng, for the suffering he put her through, but she held her blade firmly by her side and asked how to end the monster’s life. She left him as soon as she got her answer, setting her sights on the monster her lover had become.
Baiheng should have been free, soaring through the sea of stars high in the sky. She should have returned to the stars she loved so much, to explore the vast universe waiting for her out there. She should not have had to sacrifice her life, to give up her future because of their selfishness.
I’m sorry. In the end, Jingliu had nothing else to offer but an apology for what she must do, not for the oath she swore but to bring peace to her lover once more.
She closed her eyes and more memories of Baiheng came unbidden. She remembered her lover’s laugh, her smile, her warmth, her touch, and most cherished of all, Baiheng reaching out to the stars that called out to her.
Jingliu opened her eyes and ripped off a piece of cloth from her clothes and wrapped it around her eyes in a feeble attempt to block out the memory of her lover’s death. She lunged with her sword in her hand, her body acting on memory, as she had done thousands of times.
With a single stab of her sword, the blade struck her lover and ended her life a second time.
Mara overcame her, poisoning Jingliu’s mind and body as the last happy memory of Baiheng eroded away. The dragon collapsed alongside Jingliu’s sanity, and she succumbed to the grief of it all. She screamed as the last ounce of her will crumbled away and she turned her blade against the people she once swore to protect. Baiheng was dead again and so were the people who took part in the twisted ritual to bring her back. Yet, all Jingliu could think about was the fact that her lover was dead again, only this time, Baiheng’s blood was on her hands.
I’m sorry. A single apology would never be enough, and a lifetime of atonement could never undo what she did.
When the dust finally settled and hundreds lay dead by her feet, only then did Jingliu walk away. She did not know how long she walked nor how far, but she stopped when she could no longer feel the presence of any living beings around her. Jingliu looked up at the stars she had come to know so well, the same stars Baiheng loved so much, and reached out for the umpteenth time, pretending she could touch the stars despite not being able to see them through her blindfold. One day, she would follow after her lover, chasing after her, even if she must cut down the stars in the sky.