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As he watched the figures of Potter, Granger, and Weasley walk away, Severus took a moment to think back.
He only had moments now, he knew. Potter and his little crew already thought him dead and he would be in a few moments.
Severus always knew he would meet a bloody end, most probably because of the Dark Lord. He had come to accept it but now, as he lay dying, he found that he wanted to live.
‘Please,’ Severus prayed, to whatever deity that would listen, ‘Just a few more hours. Let me—’
Severus knew that Lily would rightfully be furious with him. As much as he protected her son, he needed to—
‘—see this to the end.’
Death could be considered a mercy to anyone in his position, but what Severus wanted most was closure. He wanted to see the Dark Lord fall after so many years, to see that his work was not in vain.
‘Lily,’ he prayed, ‘I’m sorry. Please forgive me.’
He’d belittled her son and could never quite see past Potter being his father’s son. It was all the harder because he saw Lily in those eyes all the time.
‘James,’ he prayed, calling to the man using his first name for the first time in his life, ‘Please show mercy when I die.’
He and Potter Sr. never got along and they never would. However, the man was important to Lily, and it was because of Severus that he died. If only he hadn’t told the Dark Lord about that wretched prophecy.
Severus knew he did not deserve mercy or forgiveness from either of them nor the others he had wronged whilst spying for the Dark Lord. He only hoped that he’d managed to right the wrongs he committed and that the Dark Lord would die.
‘Please,’ he pleaded, ‘Is it over?’
It was quite pathetic of him to be begging, but Severus didn’t care anymore. Dignity did not matter when you were dying but wanting to live at the same time. He had already lowered himself to groveling when he begged Dumbledore for help all those years ago.
‘Albus,’ he thought, ‘Is everything going as you intended?’
Albus Dumbledore always seemed larger than life, but Severus knew he was only human. He too made mistakes that were worthy of becoming regrets. There were times over the years where Severus questioned the man and his plans. However, in the end, he had faith in the man.
‘Harry Potter,’ he thought of the boy now. ‘Do you know the truth?’
It seemed like hours had passed though it was probably only a few minutes. Time passed slowly as Severus waited for the end. He wondered if Potter would feel the same when he had to let himself die for the rest of them to live.
‘Forgive me,’ he prayed to the boy whom he had failed many times over the course of his life. ‘For raising you as a pig for slaughter. Lily, I’m sorry. Have mercy on me when I see you again, if you will even see me.’
However, Severus knew that Lily would never forgive him for this, for allowing her son to die. Potter — Harry — would never forgive him or Dumbledore either. He would die with this regret heavy in his conscience.
His breathing was ragged now. He could feel his heartbeat slowing. Severus took one last shaky breath and stopped.
‘Lily,’ was his last thought, ‘Forgive me.’
Severus Snape died with regrets.