Archive of Our Own ^beta

They don't cancel other plans
Have conversations with nothing but their eyes

Tongue out and one foot propped up on the locker room bench, Buck struggled to get the zipper on his duffel bag past the bulging contents. He was sure he hadn't added anything to it since arriving at work, but somehow the contents had expanded over the last twenty-four hours.

"You need a hand?" Eddie asked, watching with an amused smile on his face as he did up his watch on his wrist.

Grunting, Buck gave another firm yank and then froze, slowly lifted his eyes to Eddie with a broken zipper in one hand.

Eddie shook his head fondly.

"Hey boys!" Hen called out, appearing in the doorway in her civvies. "Do you feel like coming over for dinner? Cap and Chim are coming too."

Lighting up at the thought of spending even more time with his favourite people, Buck dropped his broken zipper on top of his duffel bag and straightened, opening his mouth to answer in the affirmative – but then caught sight of Eddie's face. To an outsider, Eddie's expression would have been unreadable, but Buck knew him well enough to recognise the hesitation in the set of his jaw.

Eddie's eyes cut across to Buck and one eyebrow twitched. Buck understood the question immediately and felt a rush of warmth spread through his chest; Eddie wanted to spend the night just the two of them, and Buck was fully on board.

"Not tonight," Buck said, turning to Hen. "I'm just gonna plant myself in front of the tv and do nothing."

Rolling her eyes, Hen turned to Eddie and raised her eyebrows.

"Nah." Eddie shook his head with a gentle smile. "Chris has dibs on me tonight. We're gonna be making a lego satellite."

"Aw, that sounds like so much fun," Hen said with a grin. "Tell him I say hi, okay?"

Eddie nodded and Hen disappeared out the door.

Meeting Buck's gaze again, Eddie opened his mouth and began, "So…"

"I'll follow you in my car," Buck said, grinning.

Eddie visibly relaxed, the smile appearing on his face again as he reached for his bag and slung it over his shoulder.

"Sometimes I swear you read my mind," he commented, coming over to Buck's side. "Now, what are we gonna do about that?"

The two of them looked down at Buck's duffel bag with its broken zipper and half the contents spilling out in defiance.

"I'll just throw it in the back," Buck said with a helpless shrug of his shoulders. "Buy a new bag tomorrow or something." He scooped it up into his arms, holding it so that nothing would fall out, and headed towards the door.

"Don't buy a new one," Eddie said, rolling his eyes as he followed Buck towards the exit. "I'll help you fix the zipper when we get to mine."

"You think it's fixable?" Buck asked, looking back at Eddie with raised eyebrows.

"Buck, you only broke the zipper off. The rest of the bag is perfectly fine."

They kept chatting all the way to their cars, then proceeded to stand between the two vehicles for another five minutes as they kept talking.

Finally, Eddie opened his car door and signalled the end of the conversation. Buck felt his cheeks warm and ducked his head, starting to make his way around to the driver's side of his own car. If not for Eddie making a move, Buck could've ended up standing there for hours talking to him.

"See you at mine," Eddie said with a smile as he climbed into his car.

Echoing the farewell, Buck found himself grinning as he got into his car and then pulled out of the parking lot behind Eddie, trailing him through the streets.

Some days he couldn't believe this was his life.

They don't hear each other's names and forget to concentrate
Hits a nerve and lights you up like dynamite

Holding his phone between his ear and shoulder, Eddie opened the oven and slid the dish onto the middle rack. Shutting the oven door again, he straightened up and took the phone in his hand with a proud grin on his face.

He had just successfully prepared a Mexican beef mince recipe completely on his own – and it smelled delicious already. Now it just had to bake in the oven for another ten minutes so that all the toppings melted together perfectly, and it would be ready to serve for dinner.

Opening his mouth to tell Adriana about his success, he was interrupted by her changing the subject first.

"Okay, but what's with the latest photo you posted on Instagram?" she asked, a teasing lilt to her voice. "It looks like Buck stayed the night or something. Or does he just regularly wear pyjamas to come visit you now?"

All other thoughts were banished from Eddie's mind as he recalled the photo she was talking about. It was of Christopher and Buck sitting at the table together, beaming over a tall stack of pancakes drizzled with maple syrup. He hadn't even paused before posting the photo to his account, thinking of nothing except how fond it made him feel every time he looked at it.

And okay, yes, Buck had slept over the night before… but only because they'd ended up having a couple beers and Eddie didn't want Buck to have to drive home. Buck had slept on the couch, like he usually did when he ended up staying over.

Eddie was just glad Adriana didn't know enough to recognise that it was one of Eddie's shirts Buck was wearing in the photo.

"So what if he slept over?" Eddie asked, his cheeks warm. He leant back against the counter and folded one arm over his chest protectively. "We're friends. We hang out."

"Mhmm," Adriana hummed meaningfully. "He's very good with Chris, isn't he?"

A grin spread across his face unconsciously as a hundred memories filled his mind in confirmation of what Adriana had said. Buck wasn't just good with Chris, though, he was excellent. He put his whole heart into everything he did and was so genuine, letting Chris see all the different emotions he experienced so that the boy knew they were all normal things to feel – something Eddie still had a thing or two to learn about.

Opening his mouth to reply, Eddie found himself regaling Adriana with tales of Buck joining them on trips to the zoo, planetarium, and various museums. He told her how enthusiastic Buck always was, helping to engage Christopher's interest and nurture his curiosity, and how heartily Chris would laugh when Buck did something silly to amuse him.

"This one time," Eddie went on. "Buck's phone was ringing but instead of answering it he grabbed a banana and put it to his ear. You should've seen Chris, he was laughing so hard I thought I might have to get him an inhaler! And Buck was only barely grinning, talking into the banana seriously about, I don't know, an alien invasion or something?"

He let out a heavy sigh and shook his head, still grinning. "God, I love him."

There was a significant silence on the other end of the phone.

"Anyway." Eddie cleared his throat and pushed away from the counter, his face burning. "I should go."

"Eddie…"

"I have to serve dinner. Buck's—" He stumbled slightly over the word, realising this would incriminate him even more, but soldiered on. "—coming over any minute."

Rushing through a goodbye, Eddie hung up the phone and then pressed his fists to his forehead, standing there silently for a few moments to pull himself back together – and put those feelings back in the box in his mind where they belonged.

"Heeyyyyy where's my favourite Diaz!?" Buck's voice called out from the front door, and Eddie quickly straightened and turned to the oven to get back to work.

"Buck!!" came Christopher's shriek in response, and Eddie allowed himself a small smile as he heard the tell tale sounds of his son being lifted up and carefully spun around in a circle.

The smile vanished the instant Eddie opened the oven.

His Mexican beef mince bake was black. He'd completely forgotten to set the timer for ten minutes; how long had he been on the phone to Adriana?? It couldn't have been that long, surely! All he'd done was tell her a few stories of Buck with Christopher…

With a silent groan, Eddie grabbed his oven mitts and pulled the ruined meal out of the oven. The delicious smell from earlier had morphed into an acrid burnt smell, and Eddie wondered how he hadn't smelled it until now.

"Hey Eds! How's… Oh."

Eddie shamefully looked over his shoulder to see Buck standing behind him, eyes on the ruined meal.

"I swear I did everything right," Eddie began quickly, trying to justify what had happened. "But then I put it in the oven and I was on the phone to Adriana, and I just—"

Gently pushing him aside, Buck stepped up to assess the damage and then began reaching for various things around the kitchen. Eddie stepped back, a slight frown on his face as he wasn't entirely sure what was happening.

He watched as Buck scraped off the burnt surface and tipped it into the bin, then grabbed a block of cheese from the fridge and started grating it. His hands moved swiftly and confidently, never faltering, and before Eddie knew it his Mexican beef mince bake had a new cheese topping and was being slid into the oven again.

"There," Buck said, tossing the oven mitts onto the counter and beaming at Eddie. "Just a few minutes to let the cheese melt and it'll be ready to eat. No harm done."

Eddie had a strong desire to pull Buck into his arms and kiss him senseless as thanks for saving the meal, but he resisted. Just.

"You're a miracle worker," he said instead, echoing the sentiment he'd felt on multiple occasions.

"No," Buck said with a snort of laughter. "I've just burnt my fair share of meals before. Learnt pretty quickly how to salvage them."

"You?" Eddie asked, eyebrows high in disbelief.

"Yeah, me," Buck replied, eyes sparkling. "But don't tell anyone, okay?"

Eddie was pretty sure he was grinning like a schoolboy with love pouring out of his eyes, but either Buck didn't notice or he simply wasn't fazed by it.

"Your secret's safe with me," Eddie promised.

Buck gave his shoulder a squeeze and then retreated out of the kitchen again, calling out to Christopher that dinner was almost ready and it was time to wash up.

Immeasurably fond, Eddie waited a few moments before following.

Friends don't call you in the middle of the night
Couldn't even tell you why
They just felt like saying hi

Buck couldn't sleep. It was 12:38 AM and he was standing in his kitchen with the fridge door open, snacking on leftover food because he was bored and hungry and had already tried sleeping for a solid two hours before he finally gave up and came downstairs.

Pulling out a jar of leftover pickled onions, Buck fished some out with his fingers and ate them plain. Then, after only a moment's hesitation, he lifted the jar to his lips and drank some of the juice.

Putting the jar back in the fridge and wiping his fingers on his shirt, Buck picked up his phone from where he'd set it down on the counter. Swiping open to his messages, he typed out a short message to Eddie and hit send before he could talk himself out of it.

hey, am I the only one wishing there was an off switch for humans right now? can't sleep 😩

Mere seconds after hitting send, his phone screen lit up with an incoming call and he instantly answered it, holding it to his ear with a wide grin on his face.

"Not the only one, huh?" he said in way of a greeting.

"Definitely not," Eddie replied, voice soft through the phone and sending a shiver down Buck's spine. "I've just been playing Street Fighter for three hours, hoping I'd eventually drop off. No such luck."

"Three hours? Oh man." Buck chuckled. "Remind me again why we chose a job with the worst hours?"

"Cause we're masochists," Eddie said. "Obviously."

"Obviously," Buck echoed.

"What about you?" Eddie asked, muffled sounds in the background telling Buck that he was repositioning himself on the couch.

Buck loved that couch. He loved the colour, the size, the way it was a perfect mix between firm and soft… But mostly he loved the man that could often be found sitting on it.

"I'm contemplating baking a cake," Buck said, throwing out the first words that came to mind in an attempt to distract himself from his feelings for Eddie. He wandered over to the cupboard and pulled open the door, starting to pull out the necessary ingredients.

"Of course you are."

Was Buck just hearing what he wanted to hear? Or was Eddie smiling?

"Don't be jealous," Buck teased. "Maybe I'll bring you some when it's done."

"You'd better. What kind are you gonna make?"

Now committed to his task of baking a cake, Buck chatted away to Eddie while getting everything set up on his benches. He told Eddie he wasn't sure what kind of cake he was gonna bake yet, but would figure it out as he went. He pulled out half a dozen cook books to look for a good recipe and then discarded them all in favour of just going with his gut.

Wandering around his kitchen measuring ingredients and preheating the oven and finally mixing things together, Buck kept up a constant stream of dialogue into the phone. Occasionally narrating what he was doing, he and Eddie eventually found themselves straying from the topic of cake and talking about other things.

Christopher was getting really into papier-mâché lately (Buck already knew this, having personally helped with at least three projects so far) and his latest creation was a Galapagos penguin:

"Yes, the species is important," Eddie assured him.

Eddie explained how he had listened to Christopher talk for an hour about the different species of penguins and which ones were endangered and why it was important to do something to protect them. In response to learning this, Buck spoke for ten minutes about a funny penguin video he'd seen which he couldn't believe Eddie hadn't yet; by the end of which Eddie had no need to watch the video anyway.

Buck then told Eddie about a documentary he'd watched on real ghost encounters in LA, which Eddie mocked mercilessly. And despite not being able to see him, Buck just knew Eddie was rolling his eyes.

"You do not have a ghost in your apartment," Eddie said firmly.

"How else do you explain the TV turning itself on when I'm not using it?" Buck countered.

Finally getting his cake into the oven – it had ended up being a chocolate and peanut butter cake – Buck set the timer and then made his way to the couch, closing his eyes and leaning back to pretend he was sitting beside Eddie instead of merely talking to him on the phone.

Time slipped away from them. They spoke of everything and nothing, the conversation flowing easily due to their familiarity with each other, and before Buck knew it he was getting up to go check on the cake again as the timer rang off.

"Eddie, it looks amazing," he gushed as he pulled it out and set it on the bench, his phone wedged between his ear and shoulder. "I swear I could eat the whole thing."

"You promised me some, remember?" Eddie reminded him.

"Yeah, don't worry," Buck said, sticking his nose close and taking a deep sniff. "I have to wait for it to cool first, anyway."

"Wow, are you sure you didn't just inhale the whole thing through your nose?"

"Shut up," Buck said with a laugh. "It wasn't that loud."

"I don't know," Eddie continued, and Buck could hear a grin in his words. "Kinda sounded like you were auditioning to become a vacuum cleaner."

Buck laughed with abandon, thankful that he lived alone and didn't have to try to be quiet for anyone else. He heard Eddie snigger on the other end of the line – Eddie did have to try to be quiet, as Christopher was asleep in another room.

"You're so mean to me," Buck complained good-naturedly.

Time continued to pass as Buck and Eddie talked. The cake cooled down enough for a taste test, resulting in Buck moaning wantonly in Eddie's ear and earning himself a stern talking to (was it just him, or did Eddie sound a little breathless when he told him off?).

Eventually the cake was put away, the kitchen cleaned up, and Buck returned to his bed with the phone still in his hand and his best friend rating Marvel movies in his ear.

Lying there listening to Eddie give his reasons for why a particular movie got a score of 0, Buck clutched the phone tightly in his hand and wished they could stay like this forever. Not just this of course, because Buck desperately wanted more… But for now, this was enough. This was perfect. This made Buck feel like he was on top of the world.

"Oh, shit," Eddie muttered suddenly, shifting in his own bed – Buck had heard him migrate there somewhere between getting the cake out of the oven and their brief conversation about whether a first date at a cemetery was a good idea or not.

"What?"

With a huff of amusement, Eddie said, "It's 4 AM."

"No way," Buck said instantly, rolling onto his side to check his alarm clock and staring in horror at the softly glowing 04:11 AM on the screen. "Oh. Shit."

"That's what I said."

Pressing his face into his pillow, Buck giggled before mumbling, "Whoops."

"Whoops?" Eddie repeated. "We've been on the phone for almost four hours and all you have to say is 'whoops'?"

"It's been a great four hours," Buck said, the words tumbling out before he had time to consider whether he should be admitting them or not.

"Yeah," Eddie confirmed softly, making Buck's heart squeeze affectionately in his chest. "It has."

They lapsed into a short silence, and Buck wondered if Eddie was also trying to come up with an excuse not to say goodnight yet, but then–

"I guess we should probably try to get some sleep."

Buck swallowed his sigh.

"Yeah," he agreed reluctantly. "I guess so."

"You did say you were gonna bring me cake tomorrow," Eddie pointed out. "Or… today, I guess. And I don't want you having a micro-sleep in the car on your way over."

"I can Uber," Buck suggested.

There was a smile in Eddie's voice again as he said, "Go to sleep, Buck. I'll see you tomorrow."

Buck closed his eyes and imagined Eddie lying next to him.

"Goodnight, Eddie."

I love you.

"Goodnight, Buck."

Friends don't stand around playing with their keys
Finding reasons not to leave
Tryna hide the chemistry

Eddie bumped his shoulder into Buck's as he leant closer to look at the other man's phone screen. They were in Buck's kitchen, leaning against the counter reading an article on the evidence of ghosts, while Chris sat on Buck's couch watching a documentary.

Eddie wasn't sure how long he'd been here, going along with the various things Buck wanted to show him, but he wasn't complaining. Buck was warm against his side and Eddie was obsessed with the stubborn glint that appeared in his eyes every time Eddie rolled his eyes or pointed out something contrary to whatever Buck was showing him.

He wanted to do this forever.

"Dad?"

Pulled out of his Evan Buckley haze, Eddie looked up to see Chris making his way over to them, the TV already turned off in the background.

"Hey, kiddo," he said, holding an arm out for his son as he got close enough to tuck against Eddie's side.

"Can we go home now?" Chris asked sleepily.

"Sure," Eddie said, smoothing a hand over the boy's hair. "Can you just give us a minute to finish reading this article first?"

"Only if—" Chris had to pause as an enormous yawn took control of his mouth, then went on. "—if you don't take too long. It's way past my bed time."

"Is it?" Eddie asked with a slight frown, and glanced across at Buck's phone to see the small digits reading 22:34.

"Oh, shiiiiver me timbers," Buck said, also noting the time, and Eddie bit his lip to keep from laughing at his swear substitution.

"Alright," Eddie said decisively, leaving Buck's warmth to straighten up and give Christopher his full attention. "Let's get you to bed, young man. Can you walk to the car or do you need me to carry you?"

"Carry me," Chris said, raising his arms and tilting his face up to display his already closed eyes. Eddie had a feeling some of this was put-on, but just rolled his eyes before lifting the boy up into his arms.

"Oof," he muttered, getting Chris into a secure position. "I think you might be too big for this soon, Chris."

"You're a big strong firefighter," Chris muttered into his shoulder.

"He's got you there," Buck commented with a grin, and Eddie grinned back automatically, feeling a little zing shoot down his spine at the eye contact.

"We'll have to finish reading that later," Eddie said, tipping his head in the direction of Buck's phone before starting to head towards the door. "Sorry."

"Don't worry about it," Buck said with a wave of his hand as he followed. "You're not even that interested, anyway."

"Yes I am," Eddie protested, turning to face him once he reached the door. "I wanna know more about these ghost detecting devices you can get."

"EMF detectors," Buck corrected, his face lighting up. "Does that mean you'll come ghost hunting with me some time?"

Eddie fought back a smile at Buck's enthusiasm and simply said, "Maybe."

"Daaaaad," Chris whined into his ear. "I wanna go to bed."

"We're going," Eddie assured him. "I just need my keys." To Buck he asked, "Did I leave them on the kitchen bench?"

"Let me check," Buck said, and quickly darted over to the kitchen to check all flat surfaces. He shook his head as he returned, then headed over to the couch to check there as well.

Shifting Christopher in his arms, Eddie checked his pockets and found his keys exactly where they should be.

"I've got 'em," he said, calling Buck back over from his search. "They were in my pocket."

"Right, good." Buck shoved his hands in his own pockets and rocked slightly on his heels. "Drive safe."

"I will."

Eddie hesitated, not wanting to go but knowing he had to get Christopher to bed. Lately he just felt like he never got enough time with Buck; they were always saying goodbye or getting up to answer the bell at work.

Buck stepped closer, one arm reaching out, and Eddie's heart fluttered anxiously in his chest. Was Buck about to lean in and kiss him? Right here? With Chris between them? Eddie wouldn't say no, obviously, and actually it would kind of be perfect for their first kiss to be something so casual yet important, including their son in the moment as-

Buck's hand went past Eddie and grabbed the door handle.

"Here," Buck said, quirking a smile. "Since your hands are full."

"Yeah! Thanks," Eddie said quickly, stepping back through the now open door and praying fervently that his face wasn't lit up like a neon sign. "I'll see you later."

Turning his back, he strode down the corridor without a backwards glance.

As he was fastening Chris into the back of the car a few minutes later, the boy looked up at him through bleary eyes and said, "Next time, just invite Buck over to our place. That way I can go to bed while you two stay up talking."

Eddie's heart swelled keenly in his chest.

He'd been thinking the exact same thing.

Drive a little too slow
Take the long way home
Get a little too close

Buck tossed his bag in the back and then climbed into the driver's seat of his car. Glancing across as Eddie got in the passenger seat beside him, he allowed a smile to spread over his face. They'd started driving to work together a few weeks ago, just every now and then, for no reason really. Buck had just suggested it off hand once and Eddie had said yes.

Buck was so glad Eddie said yes; the drives to and from work with his best friend beside him had quickly become the highlights of his week.

"Thanks again for the lift," Eddie said as they pulled out of the parking lot and began the drive home. He had the passenger seat slid back as far as it could go so that he could stretch his legs out in front of him, and the back of his seat was tilted so he could recline. He was the picture of comfort, and Buck wanted to keep him.

"Of course. No problem," Buck said. "Maybe we should make it a regular thing."

"If you keep driving me everywhere I'm gonna have to start giving you gas money," Eddie commented, fingers tapping absentmindedly on the centre console. Buck glanced over at him and almost got caught in his gaze, but managed to force his eyes back to the road again.

"Maybe we should just move in together."

Wait. Did I just say that? Buck's grip tightened on the steering wheel anxiously.

With an amused snort, Eddie said, "That is not happening. I've heard stories from Chimney. He said you used to leave your clothes all over the floor."

"Whoa, hey!" Buck retorted with a grin, anxieties slipping away as he got lost in defending himself. "I'm not like that anymore! I've matured! I'd be an excellent roommate."

"Oh yeah?" Eddie asked, raising an eyebrow. "And you'd do your half of the chores?"

"Absolutely."

They continued to rib each other for a bit, talking about bad habits they each had and whether or not they'd actually be compatible as roommates. The tone of the conversation was light and definitely not serious, but Buck didn't mind. He didn't seriously think they should move in together before they'd even gone on a date anyway.

Slowing to a stop, Buck looked ahead at the stalled traffic which stretched into the distance. Some days, having to wait in traffic like this nearly drove him insane. But with Eddie beside him? He glanced across and the two of them shared a grin.

With Eddie beside him, Buck could sit in traffic all day long.

"Did I tell you Christopher's got a new papier-mâché project lined up?" Eddie asked as they slowly inched their way forward.

"No. What's he gonna make this time?"

"A yellow-headed box turtle," Eddie answered, and before Buck could ask he added, "Yes, he's still on his 'endangered animals' kick."

"Oh man," Buck said, sighing affectionately. "I can't wait to see what that kid's gonna do when he's all grown up."

The two of them began speculating what kind of career Chris might pursue when he was older, and before long the traffic had cleared up and they were on their way again. Buck found himself dawdling slightly under the speed limit, not wanting their time together to end, but despite his best efforts it wasn't long before he was pulling up to park outside Eddie's house.

To Buck's relief, Eddie didn't seem in a rush to leave and go inside.

As they sat there, the conversation about Chris continued and then circled back to papier-mâché as Eddie detailed the mess that had become of his kitchen table.

"Is this glue?" Eddie asked, holding one of his hands out for Buck to inspect. "I swear I'm still trying to get all the glue off from last time. I'm gonna have glue for hands soon."

"Let me see," Buck said, shamelessly grabbing Eddie's hand in his to 'properly inspect' for any traces of glue. "Hmm, I don't know, maybe? Or maybe you're just getting old man wrinkles already."

"Shut up," Eddie said with a laugh, pulling his hand free and giving Buck's shoulder a shove.

Looking up cheekily, Buck met Eddie's gaze and forgot what else he'd been going to say. Eddie was looking at him with a warm, tender smile.

Was this the moment? Was this his chance to say something, or to lean across and kiss him? Buck's heart thudded in his chest impatiently, the voice in his head screaming at him to just do something. But he wanted to do it right. He wanted to take things slow and treat Eddie with the love and respect he deserved.

"Eddie—" he began softly, but suddenly the front door of the house banged open and Christopher began making his way out towards them, Carla appearing in the doorway behind him. They must have seen Buck's car through the window.

Buck sighed and sat back, and was silently pleased that Eddie also looked a bit disappointed.

"Sorry," Eddie said, fingers resting on the door handle. "I promised him we'd have hot chocolate tonight."

"Hey, no apology necessary," Buck said quickly, shaking his head. "Go have fun."

"Dad!" Christopher called, pulling the car door open. "You're home!"

Buck's heart twinged as he watched Eddie get out and wrap his son in a hug. He couldn't help but wish to be a part of it – to be a permanent resident of the Diaz household who never had to leave and go back to his own cold apartment and toss out milk that had spoiled. To be able to walk inside any time he wanted because it was his home.

With a quiet sigh, Buck turned his gaze to his steering wheel, tapping his fingers absently and swallowing the desire to ask if he could come in and have hot chocolate with them. He didn't want to take advantage of Eddie's hospitality – he couldn't remember Eddie ever saying no when he asked if he could come over.

"Alright, hang on," Eddie said, ruffling a hand through Christopher's hair before turning to grab his bag out of the back of the car. "Let me get my things."

Christopher was almost bouncing in his excitement, swaying back and forth and holding his hands out in a bit of a dance. Buck couldn't help but grin at the sight; the boy's joy was infectious.

Putting a hand on the still-open passenger side door, Chris leaned in slightly and began talking excitedly.

"Buck! We're having special hot chocolate tonight! Dad bought fancy hot cocoa and mini marshmallows! It's gonna be so good!"

"That sounds amazing!"

"Are you gonna join us?" Chris asked.

"Oh, um…" Buck hesitated.

"Of course he is," Eddie said, stepping into view again and putting a hand on Christopher's shoulder. "Get out of the car, Buck."

Trying (and probably failing spectacularly) to hide his wide smile, Buck asked, "Are you sure?"

Eddie merely arched an eyebrow in response.

"Okay!" Buck exclaimed, swinging open his door. "Let me grab my bag!"

They don't almost say I love you
When they're downtown somewhere just a little drunk

Eddie was normally very good at keeping a lid on his emotions. He was quite experienced with putting the love he felt for Buck in a box and shoving it into a back corner of his mind where he could then pretend it didn't exist. And if it didn't exist, it couldn't hurt him.

Because Buck didn't feel the same.

At least, that was what Eddie told himself. He'd only ever known Buck to date women and the two of them had never had a conversation about their sexual orientations, so Eddie assumed that Buck was straight. Which meant that he would never return the feelings Eddie had for him.

But now? Sitting next to Buck in a bar with a substantial amount of alcohol swimming in his veins? Eddie's mental box of love had tipped over to spill out because Buck kept smiling at him, touching him, whispering little comments right up against his ear and making him shiver, and Eddie was rethinking that whole 'Buck isn't interested' narrative he always told himself.

Because he couldn't help thinking Buck was acting very interested right now.

"Next weekend," Buck was saying, the entire side of his body pressed up against Eddie's – knees, thighs, hips, shoulders and arms. "I'll come over and we'll build a huge blanket fort. You and me, blankets and pillows all over the house. We can make tunnels! Oh my god, imagine that."

Staring at the side of Buck's face, Eddie felt his recently escaped feelings form themselves into words in his mouth, eager and waiting to be spoken: I love you.

Buck turned to face him, eyes sparkling and dipping to look at Eddie's mouth. His tongue darted out to wet his lips and Eddie's brain fizzed, wanting desperately to lean forward and kiss him. He opened his mouth, imagining himself saying the words, keenly aware that he had Buck's undivided attention.

I love you. It wasn't that hard. He could do it.

"Buck," he began, and Buck smiled at him reassuringly. Eddie had never felt more confident that his feelings were returned. "I—"

"EVAN!"

Eddie jumped as Maddie slammed her hands down on the table in front of them, eyes wild and hair slightly damp with sweat from being up on stage singing karaoke with Chimney. She had her eyes fixed on Buck, who stared up at her like a deer caught in headlights.

"Your turn," she said with a devious grin.

"My turn?" Buck asked slowly. "For what?"

"Karaoke!" Maddie exclaimed, reaching over and grabbing Buck's arm to begin tugging him out of his seat. "Come on! You promised you'd sing tonight."

Reluctantly allowing himself to be pulled to his feet, Buck turned helplessly to Eddie and shrugged his shoulders.

"I did promise," he admitted.

Eddie grinned up at him, trying not to let their shattered moment sour his mood. There would be plenty more opportunities to tell Buck how he felt – a lifetime of opportunities.

"Go ahead," he said, but he wasn't sure Buck heard him – he was already being whisked away by his sister and having a microphone shoved into his hands.

Eddie leaned back in his seat and folded his arms, content to just sit and be entertained. Maddie had selected the song Buck would be singing, and after a moment of head shaking Buck let out a big sigh and accepted his fate.

Eddie's phone buzzed in his pocket, stealing his attention, and he fished it out to see who was calling him.

Tia Pepa?

"Hello?" he answered, blocking one ear so he could hear better.

"Hey Eddie, I'm so sorry to call and interrupt, but Christopher's got a stomach bug or something. He's been sick."

Already standing from the table, Eddie hurriedly told his Tia that he would be back home as soon as possible. Once he'd hung up, he began booking an Uber on his phone as he dodged his way between people and tables on his way to the exit.

He was already outside when he remembered Buck and hesitated, wondering if he should go back in and say goodbye. It wouldn't be easy, though, not with Buck singing karaoke in front of everyone and Eddie's Uber due to arrive in… wow, only one minute.

Deciding to just send Buck a text, Eddie flicked open to the messages on his phone.

"Hey."

Startling, Eddie turned around to find Buck standing right behind him, eyes bright and concerned. He felt a surge of love at the knowledge that Buck had noticed his absence and followed him out here.

"You're leaving?" Buck asked.

"Christopher's sick," Eddie explained.

"Oh! Well just let me tell Maddie and I'll—"

"No," Eddie said quickly, anticipating Buck's offer to come and cutting it off. "Stay. Sing karaoke. Have fun."

Buck didn't look convinced.

"Are you sure?"

Eddie hesitated, staring into Buck's gorgeous eyes, and thought about how wonderful it would be for them to go home together. To have Buck by his side, helping out with Chris and most likely making them breakfast in the morning.

But Chris was sick and Buck hadn't had good quality time with his sister in a while – Eddie had been monopolising all his time.

"I'm sure," he said decisively. "Go spend time with Maddie. Chris might not be up to seeing anyone else at the moment, anyway."

"Alright," Buck said with a nod. "But let me know if you need me."

"I will."

Thinking that Buck would just turn and go back inside now, Eddie was surprised when Buck instead reached out and grabbed his hand.

"Let me know if I can come over tomorrow, okay?" Buck said, expression hopeful. "But no pressure. If Chris still isn't up to it, don't worry about it."

"Sure," Eddie said, although he wasn't sure of anything right now except the feel of Buck's hand in his. Why didn't they hold hands more often? They really needed to remedy that.

"Okay," Buck said with a smile. "I should let you go. I think that's your ride."

And then Buck leaned in to kiss him on the cheek, but his aim was slightly off and Eddie felt lips on the edge of his mouth.

Warm lips. Soft lips. Lips that featured in every single daydream and fantasy Eddie'd had for the last year at least.

"Whoops," Buck said as he pulled back, a sly smirk at complete odds with the word that had come out of his mouth. "Goodnight, Eddie."

Too stunned to move or say anything, Eddie stood there like a statue as Buck let go of his hand and slowly made his way back into the bar. Just before he disappeared inside, Buck looked over his shoulder and winked.

Eddie had the distinct impression that he was floating, until a voice from behind him cut into his thoughts.

"Are you Eddie Diaz?"

Shaking off his lovestruck haze, he turned and confirmed that he was in fact the one who had booked the Uber. Climbing into the backseat, he curled the hand that Buck had held into a fist and allowed himself a smile.

Buck had kissed him.

Okay, it had only been a brief brush of lips, not a real kiss, and possibly just an accident… But then Buck had winked at him.

As the car pulled away from the curb, the driver glanced back and asked, "Was that your boyfriend?"

Eddie's heart skipped a beat.

"Almost."

They don't talk about the future and put each other in it
And get chills with every accidental touch

Standing in Bobby and Athena's kitchen with his hands in the sink, scrubbing at a particularly tough bit of food which had hardened onto a plate, Buck found himself wondering if he'd made a mistake. In his defence, he'd been a bit drunk at the time, but that didn't change the facts: he had kissed the corner of Eddie's mouth. And Eddie had been horrified.

"You know they have a dishwasher, right?"

Speak of the devil.

Buck looked up at Eddie, who had been on his mind constantly for the past few days – and weeks and months if he was really being honest – and couldn't help but smile at him.

They'd been invited over for dinner along with Hen and Chimney, and now the rest of the gathering were outside enjoying the mild evening. Buck had come inside with some empty glasses and then got straight to washing them, donning the yellow gloves he found under the sink and letting his thoughts drift to their favourite subject: Eddie.

"Washing by hand is soothing," Buck replied, finally getting the hardened food to shift. He gave the plate one last rinse and then set it on the drying rack. "Are you calling it?"

"No," Eddie said, shaking his head. "I'm not going home yet. I just came to find you."

Buck's stomach did a happy somersault. Had he been wrong about the expression on Eddie's face after he kissed-but-not-properly-kissed him?

Without a word, Eddie fetched a dish towel and began drying the items Buck had already washed. Buck merely watched him for a moment, getting lost in thoughts of doing dishes together forever… And then snapped back to himself and reached for another plate.

"Were the others boring you?" he asked with a cheeky grin.

"So boring," Eddie replied, also teasing, and bumped his shoulder into Buck's.

The two of them worked in silence for a few minutes, standing side by side and making their way through the dirty dishes, and Buck felt like a teenager again standing next to his crush. His insides were swirling excitedly and his eyes kept flicking over to steal glances.

Eddie kept looking back at him, too, the hint of a smile on his lips.

It wasn't long before Buck started talking to fill the silence, rambling on about anything and everything that came into his mind. Eddie just kept on smiling at him, effortlessly erasing all of Buck's fears and doubts about whether or not they were on the same page. There was no way Buck was wrong about this. He could see it in Eddie's eyes.

Maybe if they weren't standing in Bobby and Athena's kitchen within eyesight of the backyard…

"Sometimes I worry about Chris," Eddie said softly, and Buck let go of his fantasy of dragging Eddie into a private room so that he could concentrate. "I mean, obviously I worry about him. But he's growing up so fast, you know? He's gonna be going off to high school soon and then before you know it he'll be looking at colleges."

"Hit the brakes, please," Buck said, feigning horror. "He's still only seven!"

Eddie chuckled at the obvious lie and picked up another glass.

"It's just… he's a genius, you know?" Eddie looked up to catch Buck's gaze and Buck nodded for him to go on. "I used to worry about whether he'd be able to find something to do with his life that he can actually do and enjoy. But now it's like… he's capable of anything. He's so smart! And I really wanna support him and nurture his curiosity and creativity, but what if I can't afford to send him to the best schools and colleges? What if I end up holding him back?"

Buck let go of what he'd been washing and braced his wet hands on the edge of the sink, giving Eddie his full attention.

"Hang on, you're worried about money?" he asked.

Eddie gave a small half shrug, now looking down at the glass he was drying, and murmured, "Yeah. I guess."

"Well don't," Buck said. Then, realising that had come out a bit harsh and domineering, he added, "I just mean… I'm more than happy to help out financially if Chris wants to go to a super fancy school somewhere. Seriously, what's mine is yours."

Eddie looked up at him with a frown and Buck briefly wondered if that was a Bit Much. But it was how he felt, so he stayed silent as Eddie thought it over.

"Thank you," Eddie said at last. "But you really don't have to."

"Excuse me?" Buck raised his eyebrows dramatically. "Are you trying to tell me what to do with my money?"

"Oh, so it's yours again now?" Eddie asked, a twinkle in his eye as he put the glass down on the bench. "You just said 'what's mine is yours'. Doesn't that give me some say in how you use your money?"

With a laugh, Buck nodded in assent. "Okay, true. Maybe you could actually help me stop spending so much on pomade."

"Oh yeah," Eddie said seriously. "If you're gonna pay half of Christopher's fees you are definitely cutting back on that."

Buck smiled adoringly at him.

"Besides," Eddie said, taking a step closer and lifting a hand to Buck's hair, causing Buck's breath to hitch in his chest. "I like your curls."

Buck felt Eddie's knuckles brush against his scalp as he twisted some hair between his fingers. They were standing so close, Buck could see the subtle hue variations in his brown eyes.

I love you, he thought, the words pounding on his ribcage. I love you and you love me, and you don't even have to say it. I already know.

The very softest throat clearing interrupted the silence and both men turned together to see Hen standing on the other side of the bench, watching them.

"Sorry," she whispered, then raised her voice to speak normally. "I'm heading off. Eddie, you wanted me to tell you when I was going."

"Right," Eddie said, the word catching on its way out. "Right. I did. I did say that. Thanks Hen."

Buck felt a cold shiver as Eddie stepped away from him, carefully folding the dish towel he'd been using and hanging it back on its hook.

Without a word, Hen had slipped away again.

"Going home, huh?" Buck asked, gloved hands still resting on the edge of the sink.

"Yeah," Eddie said, avoiding Buck's gaze as he lingered. "Christopher's probably waiting up for me and I don't want him to be up too late."

"Of course," Buck said with a soft smile. "Go give him a hug from me, yeah?"

Finally looking up again, Eddie smiled and nodded.

"Will do. Goodnight, Buck."

"Goodnight," Buck replied.

Watching him leave after briefly ducking his head outside to say goodbye to the others first, Buck couldn't keep the smile from his face. He understood it all, now: why Eddie simply refused to meet his eyes sometimes; why Eddie had looked so shocked after Buck had kissed the corner of his mouth that night at the bar; why they were always gravitating towards each other no matter where they found themselves.

Returning to his sink full of water, Buck picked up the fork he'd abandoned earlier and began scrubbing it.

It wasn't fear or discomfort or horror that Eddie was feeling.

It was love.

I keep telling myself this might be nothing
But one look in your eyes and God there's something
You can lie to me and say you don't
But I know you do
And I love you too

Quietly closing the door to Christopher's room, Eddie turned and looked down the hall to where he knew Buck was waiting for him on the couch. He could just picture him: one arm flung out across the back cushions, legs spread comfortably, and a warm smile on his face. At least, that was how he'd been sitting when Eddie left to tuck Chris into bed.

The whole evening had felt charged with tension. Buck had come over early to help with dinner, eyes bright with fervour and lips permanently curled up in a smile, and if not for Chris being home Eddie would've tried to kiss him already.

Heading back down the hall towards the living room, Eddie tried to ignore the anxious thrills shooting through his body at the thought of being alone with Buck. He'd been waiting impatiently for this all evening, pulling out legos for Chris to play with and playing music for Chris to dance to and encouraging Chris to talk about his favourite endangered animals, all in an attempt to tire him out so he'd go to bed sooner … Did that make Eddie a bad parent?

Buck wasn't on the couch.

Frowning slightly, Eddie followed the quiet sounds he could hear coming from the kitchen and found Buck packing the dishwasher. Of course he was, Eddie thought with a sigh. Buck just couldn't help himself.

"You don't have to do that," Eddie said, walking over to join him.

Buck looked up with a smile bright enough to rival the sun, a plate in his hand.

"I don't mind," he said easily.

"I know you don't mind," Eddie said, rolling his eyes and reaching to take the plate from Buck and put it back down on the bench. "But this can wait, seriously. I'm not even turning it on tonight."

Buck grinned at him and Eddie suddenly became aware of how close they were standing. He could see the darker rims of blue circling the outside of Buck's irises, thin though they were due to his dilated pupils.

"If you're not gonna run the dishwasher, maybe I should wash this stuff by hand," Buck suggested with a smirk.

"Don't you dare," Eddie said, grabbing Buck's hand as it moved towards the dirty plate again.

He had Buck pressed up against the bench. Their fingers slipped together, interlacing as if it was the most natural thing in the world. Buck's tongue darted out to wet his lips and Eddie was overcome with the sudden urge to lean forward and capture it with his mouth.

"Buck," he said quietly. "Tell me if I'm reading this wrong—"

"You're not," Buck interrupted.

And then they were kissing.

Eddie wasn't entirely sure which of them had initiated it. One moment they were standing there, the air thick with tension, and the next Eddie had Buck's tongue in his mouth and he was being guided back until he hit the fridge; he felt a magnet dig into his shoulder blade.

"I've wanted… to do this… for so long," Buck mumbled against his mouth, fingers digging into his hips.

"Me—" Eddie began, gasping when Buck nipped his lower lip. "—too."

Pulling back, Buck allowed a shy smile to creep across his face. Eddie had never seen anything more beautiful in his entire life.

"Is this okay?" Buck asked softly.

"Not kissing me? No, it's not okay," Eddie said, curling his hand behind Buck's neck to drag him forward again.

Buck huffed out a laugh against his mouth but happily went back to kissing him, crowding him against the fridge in a way Eddie had never experienced before. He'd never been with anyone larger than him before, never had to tilt his head back slightly because the person he was kissing was just a little bit taller.

It was really turning him on.

"Buck," he murmured, their lips sticking.

"Mm?" Buck hummed, beginning to kiss his way down down Eddie's chin and neck.

Eddie let his head fall back against the fridge, his eyes shut and his hands fisted in Buck's hair.

"We should…" Eddie bit his bottom lip to keep from moaning as Buck sucked on his skin. He really did not want Christopher to hear any of this. Finally he managed to say, "We should… Bedroom."

Buck lifted his head and Eddie opened his eyes. Buck was gazing at him tenderly, lips slightly swollen already, and Eddie wondered just how long they'd been kissing up against the fridge.

"Are you sure?" Buck asked.

Eddie nodded.

An eager, youthful grin came over Buck's face. He stepped back, holding Eddie's left hand with his right, and began leading the way out of the kitchen.

In hindsight, Eddie shouldn't have been so surprised by how easy it was to follow Buck to his room and fall into bed together. Being with Buck was easy, natural. They'd spent years working side by side learning how to read each other's body language from the barest of movements, so now that they were finally taking things further, being intimate came second nature to them.

When they were done, lying side by side on their backs with their fingers still entwined, Eddie leaned over to press a kiss to Buck's shoulder. And while he didn't speak, he had a feeling Buck didn't need him to.

If the look in his eyes was anything to go by, Buck already knew.