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"Hey, I'm Alex Claremont-Diaz," Alex starts, grinning charmingly at the camera, lifting a hand in a wave.
"And I'm Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor, and today, we'll be reading, um, thirst tweets," Henry says, already blushing a little. The tips of his ears are rapidly turning pink and it's so fucking endearing that Alex wants to kiss his husband, fuck the cameras.
Alex already knows this is going to be an unforgettable interview. He's so fucking ready.
One of the staff members hands them two boxes filled with papers and Alex rolls his shoulders as a smile creeps up on his face. Bring it on.
"Go on, love," Henry smiles, already sensing his excitement. He's been talking about this interview for days, but not for the reasons that are obvious. He just wants to see Henry blush and stammer his way through the interview, losing his composure in public for once. There's something really hot about seeing Henry's mask slip away in public. Anyway.
Alex clears his throat, reaching into his box to pull a scrap of paper out. He feels his skin buzzing as he unrolls it, his hands a little shaky from the amount of caffeine he's had.
grace @inthealps
i would fully let alex step over me ruin my life and i'd probably still thank him after
Alex lets out a laugh, crumpling the paper in his hand. He sees Henry smiling, and he nudges him with his shoulder.
"That's very kind. I promise to be respectful and to leave your life unruined. Unruined. Is that a word? Henry, you better not be disappointed in me. That's not a word," Alex says, grinning at the camera.
Then, because he's a menace, he turns to Henry and says, "Do you relate, baby? I'd be sad if you didn't."
Henry rolls his eyes, shoving Alex in the shoulder, pointedly ignoring the question. Alex has a feeling he knows the answer, anyway. Henry totally agrees. That's more than okay because he'd let Henry completely ruin him, too.
With a put-on sigh (Alex thinks it's all for the show, that endearing little fucker), Henry reaches into his box, unfolding the paper with precise movements. Alex feels as little hot under the collar as he sees Henry's long fingers delicately handle the paper and oh, he might be in trouble. He's not going to survive this.
He sees Henry's mouth drop open, his eyebrows climbing up higher on his forehead as he scans the paper and he sees the second Henry has started regretting agreeing to do this interview. His cheeks are dusted with a faint shade of pink and he looks so scandalised that it's a little precious.
Marc @marco2994
prince henry could literally snap me in half and fuck me into the next century and i'd let him
"Uh, wow," Henry says once he's done reading the tweet out. "That started out a bit intense. Well, as long as you consent. So, thank you for clearing that out," Henry winks at the camera, recovering quickly. His cheeks are still a little pink, but he's more relaxed now.
"Well," Alex interrupts loudly, crossing his arms, feeling irrationally annoyed. "I do not consent, so you can suck it, Marc," Alex says a little hotly, despite trying to come across as teasing.
They can edit that out later if needed. Ugh. Maybe Alex was regretting agreeing to this now. He knows it's all fun and games, but he can't help but feel a little jealous. Henry was his. It's not like Henry is going to go out and fuck these people, and Alex is being irrational, but he just really fucking loves his husband, alright?
Henry laughs, pressing a quick kiss against Alex's temple and fucking fine, that placates him. He can do this; it's meant to be fun. He reaches out to pull his piece of paper out, unrolling it without a care.
k loves prince henry @agcdvinyls
agcd hold my hand in the streets and my neck in the sheets challenge
He laughs loudly, dropping the paper on the ground. He'd be in so much trouble if he said he already does that, but only with Henry. So, he puts on his most charming smile, looking at the camera.
"Yeah, the other way 'round would honestly be so inappropriate. I'm down," he nods seriously, a mock solemn expression on his face.
Henry shakes his head at him, a small smile on his face. He reaches out to get his paper out, and Alex pointedly does not look at his fingers. He looks at Henry's hair falling across his forehead in gently waves, and God, no matter where he looks, he's in trouble. Sue him for being attracted to his husband.
ella @foxdiaz
religion: prince henry's thighs
"Christ," Henry starts, eyebrows rising a little. "Wh-
Before he can get another word in, Alex looks at the camera and basically declares, "No, I agree. Fucking polo, amirite? New religion, Henry's fucking thighs. Who's in? We can start a cult."
"You're a menace. I literally cannot take you anywhere," Henry says as he closes his eyes to hide a wince.
"Baby, sorry but have you looked at your thighs? You can't blame us, really. They're fuc-"
"Alright," Henry shouts, quickly cutting Alex off. He throws a panicked glance at the filming crew, but all of them look fucking delighted. Christmas came early and all that. Alex bets they're going to go viral. He can't wait.
"This is us reading thirst tweets, not you writing them as we speak," Henry says, throwing Alex a look which basically says behave or else. Alex might be getting a little turned on. Again. Fuck Henry and his little looks.
"That's a damn shame," Alex says, turning back to the camera. The crew hasn't shouted out a 'cut,' yet, so he tells Henry to go on.
"It's your turn, love."
"Blame your fucking thighs, baby. Can't think when you just exist looking like that," Alex murmurs lowly, hoping the mic doesn't pick it up, throwing a quick glance at Henry's thighs. Yeah, he's fucked.
leo @cruelsummerhfmw
alex claremont-diaz for the gays? no babe he's for all the SLUTS out there
"Now, this is something I can get behind!" Alex declares, his lips curving up. "I am for the sluts. I am with the sluts. Go, slut it up! I had that phase, I can't lie, but I'm happily fucking married now. Not mad about it at all. Slut it up, or don't, that's on you. Don't feel too pressured. Most importantly, don't forget to live your best life, y'all. Remember to be safe though!"
Henry laughs again, fondly exasperated. "Only you'd end up giving people advice and tell them to not feel pressured to do anything sexual while reading thirst tweets."
Alex shrugs, grinning at Henry. "Hey, people tend to feel like there's something wrong with them if they don't want to give into the whole hook-up culture and sleep around with random people. Just trying to let them know whatever they want to do is okay. There's nothing wrong with not wanting anything sexual either."
Henry's eyes soften as he smiles at Alex. "I know, love. That's what I love about you."
"Okay, guys," the cameraman says, breaking the moment. "We're gonna read a couple more and then stop, yeah?"
They nod and after a quick break, they're back at it. Henry reaches out to get his sheet of paper, blushing prettily once he's done.
"God, I hate it when others can make you blush like that," Alex whispers, reaching out to lay a hand on Henry's thigh.
"Sh," Henry shushes him, blushing harder. Alex can't wait till they're alone.
lux @saigonafi
i just woke up from a nap to tell everyone i would literally let prince henry suck me off whenever wherever in whatever position he wants me he can use me like a fucking glow stick on a bonfire night and i would profusely thank him after
"A lot of thankful people in here," Henry huffs out a laugh, letting the paper slip from his hands. His cheeks are maroon, and Alex wants to press his lips to it. "See, there's no way their parents follow them on there."
"Baby, it's Twitter. Normal people don't let the people they know on there. It's, like, a public diary for literally everyone except the people you know."
"That's incredibly weird. What about your Twitter account?"
"Yeah, I have a burner. I tweet thirst tweets about you on there all the time," Alex says, and he's serious. He does.
"You do not," Henry says, eyes widening, his mouth falling open.
"No, I do. I can show you when we go home. I literally have zero shame, you know that."
Henry stares at Alex for a second, as if to see if he's being serious. Then, he gives Alex another heat-filled look that makes him squirm in his seat. Oh, they're going to have words about Alex's behaviour later. They need to get out of here, like, yesterday.
"Moving on," Henry says, his voice gravely and low. "Go on, love."
autumn child @fallinginplace
here's a list of things i would let agcd do to me
- anything
- everything
"Oh, that was quite tame," Alex says, a little surprised. "Isn't the spice level supposed to go higher once you get further in? Anyway. Lists. Fucking love them. I appreciate this, Autumn Child. You truly know the way to my heart. Get in touch and we can get started on that list."
There's a beat of silence and Alex says, "I was joking, just to be clear. Do not get in touch. I'm not sure if my husband would appreciate that."
"Oh my God, shut up, Alex," Henry groans, but he says "no, I wouldn't," anyway, so Alex is pretty sure he doesn't need to shut up.
It's Henry's turn next, and as he reads the paper, his whole fucking body flushes. The flush disappears under his collar and Alex wants to fucking kill the person who's made Henry blush like this. He needs Henry to hurry up and read the tweet out loud so that they can be done and Alex can take him home and be the only one who makes him blush like this.
"This is, uh, I don't even know what to say," Henry says a little hysterically, looking at Alex. His eyes are a little wild, like he can't believe what the person has written down. Alex hates it.
"Well, hurry up, Your Highness."
"Okay," Henry says, clearing his throat. Then, he turns to the camera, setting his shoulders, his face on fire.
henry defence squad @princehenryluver
prince henry let me eat that ass like a fucking sausage mcgrittle with extra maple syrup id tear that shit up i’d say some SLORMP on that BITCH you feel me? your knees could be the apple pie on the side id munch munch that shit and wash it down with a cold glass of my tears
"What the fuck," Alex says flatly. What the fuck. He can't believe he was jealous of this person. He isn't, not anymore. What the fuck.
"Double munch," Henry whispers in horror, eyebrows furrowed as he reads the tweet over again.
"What the fuck was that?" Alex asks as he covers his face to hide his hysterical laughter.
"Well, it's very... ambitious, I'll give them that," Henry says, eyes still on the piece of paper as if he can't believe what he's reading.
"Ambitious," Alex repeats, his face still hidden.
The director yells a 'cut,' before he can say anything more and they get ready to go home. What an incredibly weird day.
Alex is going to search Henry's name so he knows what people are saying about him. Seeing 'alex can you fight' had been very entertaining a few months ago, but now he's going to go home and tweet a little tweet that might or might not have Zahra break down his doors.
Alex Claremont-Diaz @theagcd
the way that I would let prince henry [redacted] my [redacted] until [redacted] and then he can [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] me is ridiculous
Prince Henry @PrinceHenryUK
Alex, we're literally married.
Alex Claremont-Diaz @theagcd
my point still stands, baby.
(for anyone who's confused we shot the thirst tweets interview today btw color me inspired)
Prince Henry @PrinceHenryUK
You're a menace.
Alex Claremont-Diaz @theagcd
yeah, talk dirty to me, baby.
Prince Henry @PrinceHenryUK
An absolute demon.
Alex Claremont-Diaz @theagcd
just like that!!!
Zahra Bankston @ZahraBankston
Alexander Claremont-Diaz. My office. NOW.