Chapter Text
“Blackmailer has been captured. Heading back to base.”
6 months later
It’s been six months since Fade was captured by Valorant. When she first joined protocol she was not warmly welcomed which was understandable since she blackmailed everyone. Brimstone, Cypher, Sage, and Viper were the first to forgive her for her actions. Saying with the information she had it made sense to assume they did it
The next to form a friendly bond with the initiator was Omen, which began the moment Fade brought her gray Turkish Angora cat back to headquarters. Whenever Omen knitted in the lounge area reserved for Protocol agents, Fade could usually be found silently accompanying him while she read whatever book that she decided to pick up. Her cat Gece would sit by Omen playing with the ball of yarn he was using at the moment.
Over the next couple of months Fade slowly worked to earn the trust of the other agents. Whether it was helping get information for them or helping with a project. She was able to gain the trust of Raze and Killjoy by getting them some black-market tech. Both were ecstatic to get their hands on some rare tech and would often invite her to their lab or hang out with them every now and then. Well, it was mostly them hanging out while Fade just sat silently reading, only giving her opinion when they asked her a question. The engineers didn’t seem to mind her silence; they could have a whole conversation in their heads anyway.
Jett was hard to get in her good graces, she didn't trust Fade and that was understandable. But after a couple of missions and saving her life a handful of times. The Korean said she was a decent shot as she shoulders past the initiator, which was something considering how Jett normally just glared at her.
Everyone else was easier to forgive her; the only one that bothered her was Neon. Neon said she forgave her but she could tell that the runner was still skittish around her. Fade could feel the underlying fear and how on the edge she would be when it came to being around her. Her nerves seemed to tense whenever Fade walked into the room. She tried to limit her interactions but it was hard when they all lived together.
Fade did have an awkward encounter with her late into the night. She was having a hard time sleeping with Nightmare flashing visions in her head. Deciding it would be better to stay awake, she made her way to the mess hall to get some coffee and read a book.
Walking into the kitchen she spots Neon making her way out with a cup of hot coffee in her hands. She keeps her head down making her way to the coffee machine. Neon notices movement out of the corner of her eye. Turning she sees Fade entering the kitchen and freezes, like a deer in headlights.
Her heart races as watches the woman haunting her sleep make her way towards the coffee machine. Her palms grew sweaty, causing her grip on her piping-hot drink to falter. In an instant, the cup slipped from her trembling hands, crashing onto herself and the tile floor. She lets out a string of curses as the hot liquid hits her bare skin
The sound of shattering ceramic reverberated through the air, drawing the attention of the dream seer.
Fade's gaze locked onto Neon, concern etched across her features. Without a second thought, she grabs a rag from the counter and makes her way over to Neon. She was an inch away from wiping the liquid off Neon before…
"No, don't!" Neon blurted out, her voice quivering with a mix of panic and self-consciousness. "I-I can handle this myself. Just….leave me alone.”
Neon watches Fade's expression shift from concern to hurt then stoic. Fade nods as she bends down to start wiping up the spilled coffee on the floor “You should go see Sage. Those are at least second-degree burns. I’ll clean up this mess.”
Neon looked down at her arms to see the skin was red and angry, with mild blisters forming in some areas. She mumbles “Sorry…..” before rushing out of the room
Fade sighs as she watches Neon walk out of the room. Idiot….fear was pouring off of her like a waterfall. I shouldn’t have approached her, it’s like approaching a cornered animal and expecting it to act friendly
…
The next incident was a couple of days later when she was scheduled for kitchen duty. She was in the kitchen preparing some breakfast dishes with Skye. Skye was chatting with her about a variety of different topics with Fade humming or nodding in response. Skye didn’t seem to mind though as she continued to have a conversation with her.
After finishing the dishes she lays them out on the table. One of the first agents that walked into the mess hall was Neon. Fade immediately averted her gaze as she mumbled to Skye she was going back into the kitchen to load the dishes into the washer
After she loads the dishes into the washer she makes her way out of the kitchen noting Neon sitting with Jett and Skye at a table.
Best to avoid that situation….
Fade prayed that she would be able to walk out of the mess without drawing attention to herself. Unfortunately for her Jett decided to call her out “Hey, Nightmare lady. You didn’t tamper with our food right?”
Fade was about to open her mouth when Skye slapped Jett upside the head “Hey! I helped her make the food and you already scarfed down a plate. Don’t be such a sook.”
All Jett could do was lower her gaze as her face turned pink before mumbling “It’s good…yeah…..thanks…..”
Fade flashes a small smile at Skye before turning her attention to Neon who kept her head down the whole interaction. She pushes her food around on the plate lost in her head. Fade saw the dark bags under her eyes assuming that she wasn’t sleeping well probably thanks to her.
Skye elbows the runner “Oi, Neon. Aren’t you going to thank Fade?”
Neon blinks a couple of times “Huh?” She locks eyes with Fade, her eyes getting wide. Fade saw the fear immediately peeling off of Neon's form.
Deciding it would be best to remove herself she mumbles “I gotta go fill out some mission forms, enjoy the rest of breakfast.” before hurrying towards the doors
Skye calls out to her “Wait! Don’t you want some food? You didn’t eat.” but she was already out the door
…
Fade had always been someone who craved solitude. She relished in the quietness and stillness that enveloped her when she was alone, far away from the noise and chaos of the protocol. Unfortunately, she was also plagued with Nightmare who always seemed to creep into her mind whenever she had a moment of peace. And so, Fade locked herself in her room for the next couple of days. Occasionally leaving to get some coffee or a protein bar for food. As she got to the most suspenseful part of the book, a sudden knock at the door shattered the tranquility.
Annoyed by the interruption, Fade let out a frustrated sigh. "I swear to gods if it’s Killjoy asking me for black market tech again" she muttered to herself, setting her book aside reluctantly.
She got up from her comfortable spot and made her way to the door. With each step, her irritation grew, wondering who could disturb her precious reading time. As the door slid open, her annoyance quickly turned to surprise.
“Sage…do you need something?”
The healer smiles “Ah Fade. I’m here to remind you that you have training with Quinn soon. You missed it last time.” There was no snark in her tone just her pointing out a fact
Fade sighs leaning against the doorway “Thanks ....sorry I’ve been struggling with keeping track of time.”
She half expects Sage to scold her but instead “Oh that’s alright. We all lose track of time.”
Sage couldn't help but notice the dark circles under Fade's eyes and the weariness in her movements over the last couple of days. Taking a deep breath, Sage decided to address the issue. “Have you been getting enough sleep?”
Fade runs a hand through her hair debating on whether to lie or tell the truth. She knew Sage could see through her lies so she was stuck with telling the truth “I have good and bad days. I’ve been getting enough to function.”
Sage frowns “Fade, enough to function is not good enough. Sleep is crucial for our well-being. It helps us recharge to face the challenges ahead. Viper and I can figure out something to help you sleep better.”
Fade sighs, her voice heavy with exhaustion.“It’s okay, Sage. I don’t think there’s a cure for an entity whispering in your head and feasting on your fears. This is the cost for using my radiance and I’ve accepted it.”
“I will drop the subject for now….but are you at least eating the required calories like we talked about?”
Fade huffs “Some days I do, some days I don’t—“
“Fade—“
“I know I know…it’s just….sometimes I get these visions and….I just don’t want to eat…”
Sage hums as she looks over Fade “I see. Well, I would like to do a check-up on you by the end of the week. Just to make sure you're taking care of yourself.”
Fade huffs realizing there is no point in arguing, giving her a two-finger salute “Ey, ey captain. I should head to training before Quinn has my head.”
“Is it wise for you to train while you're tired?”
With a slight smile, she brushed off Sage’s concern “I’ll be okay. I’ve trained under worse conditions.”
She scoots past Sage, closing the door behind her as she heads towards the training room.
…
When she got to the training room it was cloaked in darkness, the only lights were the dim ones that lined the walls. She would have assumed no one was there until she heard the sound of metal crunching and bending echoing in the air.
She took a step forward before a bot came hurtling out of the shadows, spinning and twirling like a broken puppet. It crashed against the wall, a metallic explosion of sparks and debris as it crumbled to the ground.
“Oh shit! Sorry Fade, didn’t see you there.”
Quinn, a seasoned assassin with a reputation for being ruthless, stood at the center of the dimly lit room with a smile. Fade knew a little bit about her from the underground network as a bounty hunter. One thing she knew is that if your file hit Quinn’s desk you were as good as dead. They worked on a couple of missions together and got along quite well. She had no idea how Brimstone had the connection to recruit Quinn but she wasn’t going to question it. Better to fight with Quinn than against. And honestly, she was one of the nicest people she’s met.
Fade nudges the bot with her foot “Killjoy is going to kill you for breaking her bots.”
Quinn waves her hands “Nah these are my robots. I programmed them for sparring…..unfortunately they require more…modifications….and armor…and fixing.”
Fade rolls her eyes “Of course you know how to program robots. So... Are we going to take a nap for training?”
Quinn chuckles “Honestly you could probably use one. But no. We’re going to work on environmental simulation. There will be situations when you have to fight in the dark, I want to train your senses to use it as an advantage.”
“I know how to navigate the dark.”
“You won’t be using Nightmare. I don’t want you to rely on your radiance all the time, Fade. There will be a time when you can’t use Nightmare. Like if omega Kay/o is around or overexert yourself.”
Fade huffed, annoyed that she was right “Fine. What do you want me to do?”
Quinn gestures to the dark side of the room “I made an obstacle course with bots. You have to make it through without one of them detecting you. They detect you, you go back to the start. They will be moving around so don’t expect them to be in the same spot.”
Fade cracks her knuckles as she makes her way toward the start of the obstacle course “Fine fine. This’ll be easy.”
….
It was in fact, not easy. Fade failed the course over and over and over. Whenever she was close to finishing the course a bot would detect her, sending her right back to the start. She growled in frustration. Come on Hazal. You're a bounty hunter for gods sake you should know how to sneak!
“Focus, Fade," Quinn's voice echoed through the pitch-black room, cutting the silence. “You're not using all your senses. Stop, listen.”
Fade was currently positioned in front of a wall near the end of the course. Taking a deep breath, she ran towards the wall. Jumping as her fingers find purchase on the edge of the wall. With a surge of adrenaline, she pulled herself up, her muscles screaming in protest.
Gods I’m too tired for this shit.
She stopped at the top of the wall listening to the environment around her.
There was a faint whirl of machinery off to her left. Gotcha
She jumps off to the right taking a couple more steps before standing next to Quinn. Who claps her on the back “Good job!”
“Are we done?”
“Nope, you have one more thing. Sparring!”
Fade's brows furrowed “No offense. But sparring you is sorta unfair….to me.”
Quinn rolls her eyes “You're exaggerating, but you're not sparring me.”
She lets out a high-pitched whistle “Alright. Sparring time. Step up.”
Fade’s stomach dropped as she looked up and spotted Neon on the other side of the mat.
Just my luck….of course
Quinn paired her with the worst possible person she could be sparing with. It seemed Neon was equally unhappy as she crossed her arms looking at Quinn
“I-I can’t spar her.”
Quinn shrugs “Tough shit. Sage wanted you to be a part of this training exercise, so you're going to be a part of it. You don’t get to pick and choose the enemy you're fighting.”
Neon shifts on her feet clearly uncomfortable with being in Fade's presence. Quinn sighs, slinging an arm around Neon's shoulders “Alright listen ... if you do a good job in this match I’ll make Roti Kluay for you”
Neon's eyes sparkle with delight “Really! Any flavor I want?”
“Any flavor you want. Just remember to keep your form tight when blocking punches. Also, utilize the shadows in this match. I made it dim and dark on purpose. I want you to get used to different environments whether its light or dark”
Neon stepped forward and got into her sparring stance without a word. Fade still saw fear peeling off of her but said nothing as she got into her fighting stance.
Neon took a deep breath, trying to steady her nerves, but her mind was clouded with doubt. The first few exchanges were a blur of swift movements and calculated strikes. Neon managed to hold her own, blocking and dodging Fade's attacks, but her fear lingered, threatening to consume her.
With every punch thrown, Neon's fear seemed to grow, wrapping around her like a suffocating fog. She stuck to the mat that was lit up while Fade weaved between the shadows and light like it was second nature.
Quinn calls out “Come on, Neon. Work with the light and shadows. You always won’t have the light in fights.”
Neon does move to the shadows for a brief time before moving back to the light part of the mat. The rest of the sparring went well until Neon stepped back into the shadows giving Fade the upper hand. She steps forward angling a punch for Neon's shoulder. Neon flinches, throwing her hands up as electricity shoots out of them hitting Fade square in the chest.
“Kahretsin” (fuck) Fades' body clenched, seizing as the electricity wracked through her muscles contracting them. She collapsed to the ground in a heap, her muscles screaming, and let out a yell of agony.
The room fell silent, the only sound being Fade's labored breaths as she struggled on the mat. Quinn turned on the lights rushing over to Fade. Fade's muscles still seizing for a couple more seconds before she slumps into the mat.
Quinn presses her fingers against Fade's neck “Fucking hellz. Her pulse is off. Are you okay?”
Fade covers her mouth as she coughs. Glancing down at her hand, the crimson stains stark against her pale skin. A wave of panic washed over her as she realized the severity of the situation but she didn’t want Neon to panic more and lose control. The metallic taste of blood filled her mouth, and she fought back the urge to cough again “Yeah…yeah I’m good. Don't worry.”
Neon was standing there, stock still and frozen, with her mouth hanging open and her eyes wide. She shoved her hands in her pockets and backed away looking small. Smoke oozed from her skin as Nightmare whispered in her head.
Food
Fade grits her teeth pushing Nightmare back into her mind
No feeding on teammates.
“Tae (shit), I’m so sorry. I-I didn’t mean to…..”
Fade attempts to plaster on a smile as the adrenaline begins to wear off and the pain starts to set in “It’s okay Neon.”
“I’m so sorry,” Neon said again, her voice cracking and high-pitched.
Her eyes were shining, looking like they might brim with tears and start spilling in a second. “I’m sorry. I—“
Quinn picks up Fade from the mat “I got to get you to Sage. Neon go check with Killjoy to see if she can help you get that access energy out.”
Quinn rushes out of the room with Fade in her arms while Neon still stands in the middle of the mat. Tears run down her cheeks as she looks in the direction they left in “I’m sorry.”
….
As the soft morning light trickled through the partially closed blinds, Fade slowly opened her eyes, blinking away the remnants of sleep. She found herself surrounded by pristine white walls and the faint hum of medical equipment. Confusion washed over her as she tried to make sense of her surroundings.
A fleeting memory of a blinding flash and a sharp pain surged through her mind, bringing with it a sense of uneasiness. She tried to sit up, but her body felt heavy and weak as if it had been drained of all energy. She flopped down on the bed closing her eyes and trying to process everything
A gentle voice broke through the silence, drawing her attention. "You're awake. How are you feeling?" Sage said soothingly, her voice carrying a hint of reassurance.
Fade runs a hand down her face “I feel like my whole system got fried.”
“Well, it did. Neon did some serious damage to your nerves and muscles. If Quinn came a second later you would have bleed out internally.”
Fade hums “Lucky me…..is Neon okay?”
“She will be. I apologize. I asked Quinn to pair you two for sparring and as a result, you got hurt.”
“You couldn’t have known Sage.”
“But I should have. Neon is still skittish around you. I was hoping that this would help her in understanding that you're not as scary as she thinks.”
Fade sighs “It can’t be forced, Sage. I hurt her mentally. Neon will ease into my company eventually but we can’t rush it.”
“I know.”
The door slides open revealing Quinn with a coffee cup in hand “Hey, Fade. Looking alive.”
“Thanks.”
Sage looks over her tablet “Well you're fully healed internally but I wasn’t able to heal all the burns on your body. I found that using too much radiant healing affects the healing process overall. It seems to affect radiants more than humans. So we’ll have to do healing sessions over the week. I’m going to assume you don’t want to stay here.”
“No.”
“Then Skye, Quinn, and I will stop by your room to change your bandages and drop off food. I don’t want you moving too much as it could aggravate the burns. The shocks also caused your muscles to contract aggressively causing some to tear in small areas. So you’ll feel sore for the next couple of days. I’ll message you when I’m going to be stopping by for healing sessions.”
“Sounds good.”
“Your legs will feel shaky the first day or two. Which will be normal until we can get some more healing sessions in. Quinn will assist you back to your room.”
Fade hums as Sage slips past Quinn out of the room.
Fade's fingers gingerly explored the fabric that wrapped around her body, tracing the lines of gauze that criss-crossed over her skin. The touch sent a jolt of pain through her, a sharp reminder that she barely lived through her training. She lifted the blanket to see the bandages covering most of her torso and arms.
“Bok (shit), that hurts.”
Quinn puts the coffee on the side table before positioning herself at the side of the bed “Here let me help”
Fade swings her legs over the side of the bed, her feet touching the cold, tiled floor. She winced, realizing that even the simple act of moving was going to be a challenge. Every muscle seemed to ache, protesting against moving or putting weight on her feet.
Steadying herself with the aid of Quinn, Fade took slow, deliberate steps toward the chair. Grabbing her shirt she finds a huge burn hole where she was electrocuted.
“Fuck me. I liked this shirt.”
Quinn chuckles digging into her bag “It’s okay. When I brought you here I saw that your shirt wasn't going to make it. I brought you another shirt to wear. Here. Don’t worry, I've never worn it and it’s your favorite color.” She holds out a black T-shirt
Fade took the shirt from Quinn's hands, feeling the smooth texture slide between her fingers. Damn that’s some high-quality fabric
Slipping into the shirt it was slightly too big hanging off of her thin physique, but still comfy regardless. Quinn finishes helping her put on her shoes before clapping her hands “Alright!”
She grabs the coffee, handing one to Fade “Here.”
Fade takes a sip, letting out a hum as the bitter coffee hits her tongue. Quinn puts her arm under Fades letting Fade lean more of her weight into her. Slowly they make their way back to her room.
Fade opens her door, turning to Quinn “Thanks, for the coffee…..”
Quinn shakes her head “That wasn’t me. I was told to deliver it to you. Then was aggressively pushed towards the medical ward.”
“What?”
Quinn reaches into her inner jacket pocket pulling out an envelope. “Just give her time. Seeing your worst fear come to life is a lot to process for someone. You need help getting to your bed without face-planting?”
Fade takes the envelope weakly pushing Quinn’s shoulder “I’ll be fine. Asshole.” She shut the door before she could hear the response. Hobbling over to her desk. She sits down, opening the envelope to reveal a card of a cartoon cat with big brown eyes and rainbows.
Looks like someone drew this. Cute
Opening the card she finds delicately curved handwriting
Fade,
I’m sorry I injured you during training. I didn't mean to hurt you. Quinn told me you would probably be out for the rest of the day. I tried to make you coffee for when you wake up, black with one sugar just how you make it in the morning. Hopefully, I got it right.
-Neon
P.S. Thank you for making breakfast. Sorry, I didn’t say anything to you. Also thank you for cleaning up the mess when I spilled the coffee
Fade smiles to herself reading the card over again. It wasn’t exactly Neon talking to her directly but it was a step in the right direction. She reads the last part of the card her face heating up
She watches me make coffee every morning…
She shakes her head “Of course she watches me. Probably thinks I’m going to do something to her.”
She grabs a thumbtack pinning the card onto her corkboard above her desk. She chuckles to herself seeing the bright colorful card against the dark walls of her room
Alright, Neon. It looks like we’re making progress