Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Loki was going to die.

He knew it and he had known it for months, a plan carefully crafted and thought out, strategized to every possible outcome, no one else knew it yet though. He knew when, how and where, he was just counting down the days till the end of this school year, hoping that the long summer break would brush his deceasing over and that his family (minus Odin) could continue their lives like normal afterwards, if he was there or not would not be that much of a difference anyways.

The sun had not yet risen, as Loki's alarm went off, he groaned slightly, trying to shake off the sleepiness. He rubbed his eyes and switched the clock off. It read 5:00 a.m. Loki slowly made his way to the small bathroom connecting to his room, shivering at the loss of the warm bed. The light seemed too bright that morning, almost blinding the raven as he went to wash his face.
He observed himself in the mirror, making sure none of his bruises were showing, luckily, they were only on places like his arms, he lifted up his short sleeve to his shoulder. The light bumps that were usually a bright white covered by a now almost green bruise, he flinched as his fingers brushed over it. He wouldn't have to put makeup on, at least that spared him some time.

When he was done getting ready, he got dressed, opting for a black long sleeve and some dark green trousers.
The rest of the house was still asleep, so Loki tried to stay as quiet as he could when he was creeping down the stairwell, not even switching on the lights.
Sometimes he liked spending his mornings alone, though he did miss the feeling of doing stuff as a family.

'But I guess I never had that to begin with, Thor, maybe, but never me.'

He thought as he ate his cereal, the only sound around him being the clock on the wall and the dripping of the coffee machine. When he was done eating, he took his mug and went upstairs, silently closing the door to his room, still adamant on not waking any of the other people in the house. He glanced over to his alarm when he sat down at his desk, it only just read 5:42 a.m.

'Thor will get up in half an hour, so will Odin' 

Loki thought, that meant he still had half an hour of peace, he should use that to his advantage. Loki took the book he had just placed on his nightstand the evening before and started reading a bit, the sun starting to rise and the rays of sunshine starting to drop into his room through the window behind him.

He shut his book and placed it on his desk when he heard a door opening on the other side of the hallway, heavy footsteps thumping towards the stairs and eventually making their way to the kitchen.
Loki knew that it was Odin who was awake, over the years, he had learned how to differentiate the sound of the family members living with him and now he could always tell when someone was walking around the house. He also knew that Thor would sleep for as long as he could, which in the case of it being a week day would be roughly 6:15 to 6:20.

Loki had to leave the house by seven, even though he had already turned 16 last winter and it was bordering on summer already, Thor remained the only one of the two siblings who owned a car, and a driver's license.
Thor also always took all of his friends to school with him, so Loki had to take the Bus each day. Obviously, he was a year older than Loki, but the younger brother had still secretly wished for at least some money to pay for driving lessons when he had turned 16. Thor had gotten his own car when he turned 16!

But in this household, he was already used to being kind of forgotten. That had been very clear ever since he was a small child. Thor was always favored by Odin, their Dad would take the elder out a lot more, to football matches or other events. Loki was never allowed to come with them. He wasn’t too mad about that though, as he did prefer to stay at home with Frigga and learn stuff like baking and other creative things in his free time.
His father had scoffed at that, often telling Frigga that Loki should learn some proper ‘manly’ things, but she had always objected, telling Odin that everyone should learn household things, even Thor. Odin had shaken his head, muttering under his breath what Loki knew only years later was the word ‘pansy’. Loki didn’t really mind, he had figured out that he wasn’t only into girls pretty early on, noticing a small crush on a boy here and there.

But, living in Texas, he never really allowed himself to indulge in any of his feelings. And even if he found he had taken a liking to a girl, he could never actually dream of getting close to someone in a romantic way when that person also visited his school, he wasn’t exactly popular. 

Suddenly someone knocked on his door, Loki flinched but muttered a quiet ‘come in’ after a second. Frigga opened the door and poked her head into his room. 

‘Oh, good, you're already awake’

‘I usually am, mom.’, Loki said and smiled at her slightly.

‘I know dear, I just wanted to make sure, just in case’ She was always so thoughtful, Loki thought as he nodded and Frigga left his room to go downstairs to have some breakfast too.

When 6:20 rolled around, he could hear Thor walking around the house. Soon after his brother went downstairs, he could hear the loud laughter of him and Odin, no wonder they were in such a good mood, Thor was the captain of the football team and they had won an important game the day before, leading in him coming home extremely late, extremely drunk, but also extremely happy. Of course, they’re father was very happy with the results too, as proud as a father could be.

Thor was on his way to get a full scholarship with how he was playing, and even if they had more than enough money, it could never hurt to have something like that on your resume. Loki sighed, even if he wasn’t particularly fond of stuff like football (he was a lot better at track), he would like to be the object of Odin's pride for once, not that it would really matter anymore, but sometimes he still liked to wish for something like that. 

He continued reading for a few more minutes until he had to get going for school, he took his backpack and his mug, already regretting having to go back into the kitchen, and went downstairs. The kitchen smelled wonderful, Loki could already smell the pancakes from mid way down the stairs, a big con on having breakfast before Frigga woke up.

Sure, Loki knew how to bake and cook, but in the mornings he often found himself not motivated enough. The few times he did get to enjoy a breakfast like this was when Thor and Odin were out on the weekends for another of Thor's games, leaving Loki and Frigga at home. One: because the two of them couldn't care less about football and even if Frigga was very proud of Thor’s accomplishments, she didn’t actually want to see the games, and two: because Thor and especially Odin didn’t want to be seen with Loki at the games. Loki had known this for some time now, and even if it did hurt a bit in the beginning, he’s gotten used to it by now and simply doesn’t care. 

When he entered the kitchen, Odin and Thor were still eating their breakfast, talking joyfully about some game or something else that Loki couldn’t quite understand. When the younger brother came into Odin’s line of sight, the man’s facial expression darkened. ‘There you are, Loki. I was just talking to Thor about you, you know?’ Loki had already had enough, he knew what was bound to follow, endless comparison and criticism.

‘Obviously you are still a year below him, but you really have to start doing stuff to get onto your record for college, not everything is achieved by sitting around and reading books.’

Loki could practically hear the snare drip from Odin’s tongue, the obvious disdain he had towards him was not a secret, well, to most. Thor had seemingly never caught wind of what was going on between his brother and father.

Loki shrugged, not really caring. Not like he was going to make it until college at all. He used to think about his future a lot in the past, dreading it. When he thought about it, all he could ever see for himself was a life full of misery, not uncommonly had he thought about running away, somewhere where no one knew him and he could start anew. But then he had thought of his mother, and how hurt she would be and he couldn’t do it.
Obviously he knew that dying would be equally as hurting, but he told himself that at least knowing what happened to your child is a bit nicer than not knowing at all and them just disappearing on one random day. 

He cleared away his mug and went to the front door, lacing up his shoes and throwing on a jacket, making sure to check the temperature outside before leaving the house. When he was about to leave, Frigga hurried to the door and gave him a short hug.

‘Have a good day Loki’, she smiled and Loki grinned slightly.

‘I will mother, don’t worry’

The bus ride to school was short but very boring. Loki sat alone, listening to some music, or, on some days, reading a book. Today, he had forgotten both his headphones and his book, which was still lying on his desk from where he had abandoned it this morning. 

He sighed, resting his head against the window and immediately regretting it when it kept bumping against the glass with every uneven bit in the road. 

The school was already very lively, even if it was just 7:30 a.m., though, half of the students still looked like they were half asleep. He made his way to his first class, physics.

Whilst he was walking there, he could hear someone talk to him, or was it about him? He never could really tell.

‘Look, it’s the fag again.’ Loki tried to ignore it, Fandral, one of his brother's closest friends had for some reason made it his life quest, to make his life a living hell. Curt comments in the hallways was the tamest thing he had done to Loki, though it had had quite the impact on Loki’s social life. The raven didn’t have a lot of friends to begin with, being Thor's brother you would expect the opposite, but everyone seemed to adore Thor and absolutely detest him.

Loki never knew why, and he also never knew if Thor noticed how everyone was treating him and just didn’t care, or if he really never knew. But, after Fandral and the rest of his close circle of friends had started to make fun of Loki, even the few people he hung out with started to distance themselves from him, not wanting to be picked on the same way Loki was. 

It had started with simple comments, whispers about him in the halls when all he did was walk by, then they started to get bolder, saying stuff to him directly and at last they started to actually get physical. Loki still remembered the first time he was just in the bathroom at school, when Fandral had also entered the same one. Loki had tried to ignore him and leave as fast as he could, but the older boy had grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and smashed him against the wall. Loki had needed to put on makeup for weeks afterward, the bruises showing clearly on his cheek, but also his stomach, arms and ribs. 

That was also the first time he had cried at school, not from the pain, no, but about how any of it had happened, how he couldn’t even be strong enough to defend himself. The worst part was that he couldn’t tell anyone about it. Frigga would be so worried, and she already had a lot to do, managing both the household and her full time job.

He hadn’t wanted to burden her with his personal problems. Thor he couldn’t tell either, Fandral was his best friend and Loki and Thor had not been very close the past few years, Thor would believe Fandral over him without blinking. Odin was completely out of the question. Loki’s father would mock him for not defending himself, for not being strong enough, he would compare Loki to Thor again and tell him how Thor would have managed the situation a lot better. He might have hit Loki another time himself, just to make sure Loki really couldn’t defend himself. He had done so in the past, so Loki didn’t see it as very far fetched. 

But because of this, Loki had been suffering in silence, the only way to get rid of this horrible feeling was to let it out on himself. He had the scars to prove it, but luckily no one had ever seen them, he was glad about that too, they would probably just make fun of him for it.

Physics was almost empty, not a lot of people had chosen the subject for this year. 

Most of the people were sitting in pairs, he knew some of them, he used to be friends with some of them too. He sighed, he couldn’t let negative thoughts take him over like this. He should at least enjoy the last few months of his life with some stuff he liked.

The teacher, a nice man in his mid thirties entered the room, smiling at what seemed like every individual student. ‘Good morning everyone’ After they welcomed each other, the Teacher turned to the class again, holding a piece of chalk in his hand. ‘So, we’re getting a new student today, would you like to introduce yourself?’ Everyone, including Loki, turned around, seeing another student just poking his head through the door.

Chapter Text

The boy stood at the front of the class, eagerly writing his name on the back board. ‘Mobius’ it read, and Loki couldn’t help but grin a little, at least he wouldn’t be the only one with a weird name in his year anymore. Mobius was, how Loki guessed, a few inches shorter than he was. He had short blonde hair that was styled in the front, if Mobius was a few years older, he could have mistaken him for an office worker.

‘Would you like to introduce yourself to the class?’

Mr. Heimdall asked Mobius, who nodded quickly.

‘Uhm yeah, I’m Mobius, I just moved here from Ohio and I guess I hope to have a good year here, that’s about it.’

Mobius nodded to the teacher, who suddenly pointed in Loki’s direction. This caught the raven off guard, but when he turned around he realized that he was the only one who didn’t have a partner, so it made sense. He just felt bad for the new boy, sitting next to Loki on his first day couldn’t be a good thing. But, the blond just nodded and went over to Loki, sitting down directly next to him. He held out his hand to Loki.

‘I just introduced myself, so you hopefully know my name.’

Mobius grinned at what seemed to be a bad try at comedy.

‘I do, Mobius, my name’s Loki.’

The raven smiled, shaking the other boy’s hand. 

They sat there for about five minutes, listening to Mr.Heimdall explain something, before Mobius turned to Loki.

‘Hey, Loki, on my way here I already got lost, I was lucky I asked the right teacher for directions, but would you mind maybe showing me around the school after class? Maybe just show me the rooms where I have to be?’ Loki couldn’t really say no to the other boy’s request, he just hoped that Fandral, Sif and so on wouldn’t pick on him when Mobius was around him, that would make for quite the awkward situation. ‘Sure, can do.’
He smiled slightly at Mobius.
‘Great, thanks. You know, my old school was quite a lot smaller than this one, lived in quite the rural area, so there weren’t a lot of people to go to school anyways.’
Mobius paused for a moment, looking like he wasn’t sure whether to continue talking or if he should leave Loki alone, but continued after Loki gave him a small nod, signaling that he did in fact like listening to the other boy. ‘I mean, living in a smaller area was nice and all, but you know, not that I can change anything, my parents divorced, dad got custody, so I moved here with him, not that I mind and all, I guess a change of scenery is never a bad thing.’

‘I mean, we do have some nice areas around here, a lot of coast and stuff.’ Mobius seemed to lighten up at that. ‘I confess, I didn’t really look up the geography, but that’s amazing! Me and my dad love going jet skiing, so having the sea nearby is the best possible outcome. Only ever going out on lakes and stuff gets kinda boring and I was already thinking, what if the city doesn’t have enough space to go jet skiing, I guess I don’t need to worry about that anymore. Have you ever been o a jet ski?’ ‘Uh, no, haven’t ever really had the chance to try.’

‘Oh my god, you need to try, really, I’m sure my dad won’t mind if you tag along, I could teach you!’ Loki hesitated, he wasn’t sure if befriending the new guy was the best decision, but something about Mobius’s way of talking to him made him interested in learning more about the other boy. He didn’t know why, but he was willing to take the risk. ‘Sure, sounds good.’ Loki smiled, he hadn’t had a conversation like this in a long time, nonetheless being invited to hang out with someone either. Talking with Mobius seemed easy, the blond kept the conversation going, which made up for Loki’s awkwardness. ’Awesome, do you have any hobbies of your own?’ ‘No, not really, I mean, I like reading and some other creative stuff, baking is quite fun too, but other than that, not really.’

The look Mobius gave him almost made Loki laugh out loud in class, he looked like he had just heard the most shocking thing known to mankind.
‘Like, nothing else?’
‘No, I mean, I guess I’ve never really tried anything else, or had the time to try out something new outside of school.’
‘Oh my god, dude we have to try out some stuff, I mean, other than football and jet skiing, I don’t do a lot in my free time. I mean, I did just move here, so I don’t really have a lot of connections yet.’
‘Makes sense, you’re on the football team?’ Loki was uncertain what to think of that, on one hand, he didn’t really mind, on the other though, he thought about what kind of people were on the team. ‘Oh yeah, my dad told me to sign up for one club, you know, to meet some new people and stuff. Are you on the team too?’
The raven shortly thought about what he should say to Mobius, but eventually answered. ‘No, but my brother is. Thor, he’s the captain.’
‘Oh wow, real celebrities in the family then.’ Mobius said teasing, and even if Loki didn’t like talking about his family or Thor, he couldn’t help himself but laugh, getting them both a stern look from Mr. Heimdall, so they stopped talking and decided to actually do some work for the rest of the lesson. 

When physics was finally over, they both grabbed their stuff and headed outside. Loki had promised Mobius to show him where he needed to go for his other classes, so Mobius dug out his time table, showing the paper to Loki. ‘Oh, we actually have a few classes together, that’s nice.’ Said Loki when he looked over Mobius’s schedule, the blond boy laughed. When they had gotten up from class, Loki was able to confirm his thoughts, Mobius was in fact quite a bit shorter than he was, only reaching roughly up to his nose. 

‘That’s a relief, then I at least know someone in some classes and don’t just go in there with no one to talk to.’
‘Yeah, that is nice, you can sit next to me in the classes we share, I don’t mind Mobius.’ Loki smiled and Mobius nodded eagerly, making Loki feel light on his feet.

The rest of their break was spent walking around the school building, Loki showing Mobius all of his assigned classrooms and the grounds too.  

‘I mean, wow, these grounds are actually massive, thanks for showing me around. I'm sure I would have gotten lost otherwise.’ Mobius said, as he and Loki sat down underneath a tree next to an unoccupied football field.
‘Very understandable, I did actually get lost so many times in my first few weeks here.’ Loki chuckled, as he started unpacking his breakfast. ‘But isn’t your brother also at this school, couldn’t he show you around or is he younger than you?’
‘Oh, uhm, no. Thor is a year older than I am, but I guess he never really had time, you know, hanging out with his friends all the time and stuff.’ Mobius realized the topic made Loki uncomfortable, so he just mumbled a small ‘asshole’ and quickly changed the topic. ‘So, what are your favourite subjects, I mean, we probably should get to know each other a bit more.’ The blonde slightly cringed at these words, he made it sound like they were on a date or something, he looked up at Loki from his sandwich and saw the raven cock his head to the side and grin slightly, it looked kind of sly Mobius noted, it suited him. 

‘I guess I do quite like literature and biology, but what about you? I think you know more about me at this point than I do about you.’ ‘Oh, I guess I don’t really have a favourite subject. It kind of depends on the teachers and the people in that class, physics is pretty great.’ Mobius added light-heartedly, but Loki couldn’t help but feel something within his chest flickering, making him feel a bit woozy and just a bit lightheaded. He brushed off the feeling, laughing along with Mobius. 

When the break ended, they went their separate ways, Mobius had history and Loki had arts. Mobius was kind of nervous, he wasn’t the best at talking to new people, the fact that Loki and he had clicked so well was nothing but coincidence. The fact that he just moved here at almost the end of the school year didn’t make it better, everyone already knew everyone and were in their own groups, whilst a newcomer was not easy to put into that equation. 

The classroom was quite empty when he entered, it made it harder for him to sit down anywhere, since he didn’t know what seats were already taken, so he just stood by the door awkwardly whilst he waited for the teacher to arrive, earning him some weird looks from the students entering the room and sitting down at their seats. When the teacher, a nice looking lady with long black hair, probably in her mid to late forties arrived, she looked at him very confused. ‘What are you doing here, standing by the door like that?’
‘Oh, sorry, I’m new, so I didn’t know which seats were already taken.’
‘Oh, right, sorry Dear, I was told I was getting a new student today, I completely forgot, you should introduce yourself to the class first but then you could uh,’ She looked around the room a bit puzzled, before landing on some spot with her eyes. ‘Yes, you can sit next to Casey, right there, middle left.’ The teacher nudged in a direction and Mobius followed her gaze, landing on a boy with short, dark brown hair and big, wide eyes. He looked friendly though, Mobius thought, so it couldn’t be that bad.

After another nerve wracking introduction from himself, he went over to the boy named Casey and sat down next to him, feeling very awkward and at that point he wished he could just sink into the floor. But, he thought it couldn’t hurt to get to know other people, so he turned to the other boy. ‘Hey, nice to meet you, your name’s Casey right? Ms Mimir told me earlier.’
Casey looked at him with big eyes and Mobius wasn’t sure if it was supposed to be an expression or if that was the normal state of his face. ‘Oh yeah, that’s my name, you're Mobius if I heard correctly?’ Mobius nodded, he was glad that Casey was talking to him, maybe making friends here wasn’t too hard after all.
‘So, why did you change schools, I mean, this close to final exams? Isn’t that really stressful?’ ‘I mean, sure, but I didn’t really get a say in the whole thing, my parents got a divorce, so yeah.’ Casey looked like he had just accidentally murdered his own pet or something. ‘Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have brought it up.´ Mobius chuckled slightly, he didn’t particularly mind being away from his mother, it hasn't done either him or his dad any good. ‘It’s fine, Casey, really, you couldn’t have known.’ 

‘Yeah, still, I won’t bring it up anymore, it can't have been a long time since they broke up.’

‘Thanks, and no, only just last month, but they’ve had it coming for ages anyways, so it wasn’t that much of a surprise.’ Casey nodded, and seemed to change the subject fast, which Mobius found very relieving, he didn’t want to talk about his parents any longer. ‘But anyways, how do you like it here so far? What subject did you have in the first period?’ 
‘Oh yeah, I think it’s actually really nice, the grounds are massive compared to my old school, luckily I was already shown around, so I shouldn’t get lost here anytime soon. I had physics in the first two lessons, it was quite fun, but Mr Heimdall seems very nice too, I think that’s a big part about if I like the subject or not.’
‘Ooou, so lucky, Mr Heimdall is seriously such a cool teacher, I had him like two years ago. Those were the best math classes I have ever had in my entire life, my grades were never that good compared to when I had him as my teacher.’ Casey practically gushed over their teacher, Mobius couldn’t help but laugh a bit, although he did understand, he used to have some teachers like that too.

The class kind of flew by, and by the end, Casey and Mobius had exchanged numbers, they had talked a bit more during class, but at some point Ms Mimir had told them to be quiet, so they hadn’t said anything not class related for the rest of the period. Casey had invited Mobius to tag along with him and his friends for lunch, and Mobius had gladly accepted, he didn’t know where Loki was at this point and when Casey had asked if they should exchange numbers, Mobius had noticed how he had never gotten Loki's number, nonetheless asked for it either, they had just kind of forgotten. So now he was sitting at a small round table with a bunch of other kids.
‘So, you guys, this is Mobius, he just moved here and I hope you don’t mind him sitting with us.’ Casey said, all smiley, and all the other people voiced that they were completely fine with Mobius sitting with them, which made Mobius feel very welcome. ‘Thanks you guys, I don’t really know that many people here yet.’

‘Oh, right, we haven’t introduced ourselves yet. I’m Hunter.’ Said the girl sitting opposite Mobius, she had a short haircut and her bright yellow top and jeans jacket combo really stuck out from the other students. ‘I’m Ouroboros, but you can just call me OB, everybody does, Ouroboros is kind of a long name.’ Mobius smiled and nodded at the short kid in front of him, he would try to remember his full name anyways. Mobius turned to the last person sitting at the table, they had a kind of brownish mullet, with blonde streaks, it reminded him of the eighties hairstyles his dad used to tell him about laughing at the dinner table.

‘I’m Sylvie by the way, nice to meet you.’ Mobius gave a short ‘nice to meet you too’ back, before they all started talking and having nice little conversations, they made sure to ask him stuff too, so he didn’t feel left out. 

All in all, he thought it was a pretty great first day so far, he could live with this, he thought, though, he would really have to get Loki's number at some point. He would just ask Loki the next day, the raven had pointed out that they shared an English class on Tuesdays, so that came in quite handy. 

Chapter Text

Loki enjoyed arts, growing up, he had a lot of experience with a lot of different mediums that Frigga had taught him and he would say all the practice he had over the years had made him quite the good artist.
At the moment they were working on portraits, and Loki liked just sitting in class for two hours, listening to some music and working on the current project. Luckily, their teacher put on some music with a speaker, so even without headphones he could still listen to some. 

The bad thing about arts was that it seemed to pass way too quickly, it felt like the second he put his pencil down on the paper, the bell already went off and he had to head out.

He didn’t exactly know what to do with his breaks, he didn’t know where Mobius was, and so he returned to the tree outside, sitting down and started waiting.

He wasn’t entirely sure what he was waiting for, he guessed some part of him was hoping that Mobius would come to him and they could spend their break together. He realized mid thought that it was probably kind of weird to wish for something like that when he had literally only just met the blond this morning, but he guessed that just kind of happened because he didn’t really have anyone else to spend time with. So he just sat there and waited, even though he knew Mobius wasn’t going to show up, hell, they hadn’t even said they were going to meet here again, how pathetic was that of Loki? He took out his lunch box and started to eat some of the fruits he had packed. 

After a few minutes, he could hear voices, he didn’t mind them much, until he could vaguely make out the owners of said voices.
He looked up and saw Hogun, Volstagg and Fandral approaching. He could feel shivers running down his spine as he scrambled around, trying to pack his bag as he remembered why he didn’t usually go anywhere near the football fields during his breaks, he had completely forgotten earlier when he was here with Mobius.

Before he could actually leave, a hand clapped him on his shoulder, sending shockwaves through his entire body, as he turned around to see Volstagg, another one of Thor’s close friends. Even though Loki was already very tall, Volstagg still somehow managed to make Loki cower underneath him.

‘Look who it is, didn’t know you wanted to join the football team, you know we don’t want fags like you in our ranks.’

Loki scoffed, like he’d ever be dumb enough to join a football team, especially the one at his school. He did still want to die at his own hands, not at those of some homophobic assholes.

‘Actually, no, I wouldn't want to spend my time kicking around a ball, seems like wasted time when I could actually learn something.’

Volstagg’s expression signalled Loki that he should’ve better kept his mouth shut, but before he could say anything else, or before Volstagg or any of the others, who had just been standing around could do anything to him, he heard someone call their names.
The three turned around to see Thor on the other end of the field, accompanied by Sif and Jane, his girlfriend, who was practically always around him. He still remembered when Thor and Jane had gotten together, they were, and still are, the dream couple of the entire school, it was like watching high school musical or something. 

He also still remembered when Thor had brought home Jane and introduced her to his parents, Frigga immediately liked her, and even Odin approved of their relationship, saying that Thor should treat her right and so on. He also remembered how Odin had told Loki that he should find a girlfriend.
Loki hadn’t been brave enough to say he wouldn’t mind a boyfriend either, or anything in between. 

He knew what Odin’s views on people with a different sexuality were, his father had made all of that very clear on multiple occasions.
One time, they were watching a show together whilst having dinner and there was a gay character, not even anything big, it just was a fact and Odin had made a big scene about how these people shouldn’t exist.
This happened when Loki was still younger and he had spent the bigger part of the night crying, trying to understand what he had done wrong.

Fortunately, he was completely at peace with his sexuality at this point, he knew it was hard to be open about it, especially in Texas, so he decided to just keep it to himself, even though a lot of people seemed to ‘know’, since they were always calling him names anyways.

Jane, Sif and Thor made their way over to the group and Thor seemed to be surprised by seeing Loki with them.
‘Loki! What are you doing here?’, he asked, sounding less optimistic than normal.

‘Nothing, Thor. Actually, I was just heading off to somewhere else.’ Loki said, just glad to get away from the others. 

Loki grabbed his bag and left as fast as possible, returning to his usual sport, under the stairs. He liked it there since no one ever saw him. He didn’t bother going to the cafeteria, since sitting all alone at a table would just get him even more looks.

The rest of the day passed by quite fast, Loki just had Social studies and he spent the better part of that not actually doing anything, because their teacher seemed just as tired as the students and couldn’t seem to be bothered at all.

When the final bell rang, everyone jumped up, including Loki. He headed outside to where the school buses were already waiting for the students. When he was walking towards his bus, a hand suddenly clapped him on the shoulder. He spun around, alarmed, but there was none other than Mobius standing behind him. 

‘Hey, Loki, glad I found you, I completely forgot to ask for your number earlier.’ Mobius grinned at Loki and the taller boy couldn’t help but smile back as he noticed the dimples that formed when the other smiled. ‘Oh, right, I didn’t think of it either, wait’, Loki said, as he hastily grabbed his phone and pulled up his contact information for Mobius.

The other quickly typed in Loki's number on his phone.
‘Thanks! We can text later if you’d be up for it?’
He asked and Loki quickly nodded as a reply. Mobius quickly waved goodbye, before heading for the parking lots. Loki went and sat down in his bus, smiling at the thought of texting with someone, especially Mobius, maybe even calling at some point. He spent almost the entire way back home wondering how he should start off the conversation, but when he got home for lunch, he already had a message sitting in his inbox. 

‘Hey Loki, it’s me, Mobius! How was the rest of your day today? I didn’t really see you except for the first two lessons.’ 

 Loki grinned as he typed out a reply.

‘Hi Mobius, my day was actually quite good, arts is always fun and my Social Studies teacher didn’t really do a lot with us today, so that was pretty chill.’

He pressed send, before entering the kitchen.
No one else was home yet, both Frigga and Odin wouldn’t be home because of work and Thor was probably eating somewhere with his friends after school. Loki sighed and opened the fridge, eventually settling on just making himself some pasta with pesto. When he sat back down at the table, his phone rang and he saw another message from Mobius.
He quickly went onto their conversation and answered. 

The two of them spent the better part of an hour texting, whilst Loki was having his lunch. They talked about all kinds of stuff, including childhood pictures, Mobius had even sent him some, which Loki had found very cute, on one of them a two year old Mobius was petting a little snake on the head and Mobius had laughed about it and told Loki that said snake had actually bitten him after the photo was taken, but it was luckily not that venomous and it hadn’t damaged him.
After their talk about baby pictures, their topics had wandered back to school and Loki had told him which teachers were nice and which ones he would have to watch out for. At some point Thor and Jane had come back home,  wanting to watch some movie together and effectively kicking Loki off the living room couch, where he had sat beforehand.
So Loki had retired to his room, complaining about Thor over text, to which Mobius had laughed a bit about Loki and had then stated how he was actually very happy about being a single child. 

The two of them had texted for hours, before Mobius had to head out to help his dad clean out some of the stuff they hadn’t yet sorted from the moving boxes.

When Loki had put away his phone, he was grinning like a thirteen year old girl with a crush on someone. He felt really happy and texting with anyone for this long was completely new for him, he was just glad that he and Mobius got along so well and their conversation flowed so easily. It made things a lot less awkward than he had thought initially.  

Mobius couldn’t really be bothered to help his dad, his arms ached from carrying around all of the heavy boxes for the last few days and there seemed to be no end to the infinite pile that still stood in the corner of their new apartment.
When his parents had told him they were going to have a divorce, he wasn’t all too surprised, his parents had been fighting a lot in the past few months, almost making it impossible to enjoy an evening in peace.
Hell, Mobius couldn’t even invite friends over because his parents were always arguing and fighting. It wasn’t uncommon that his dad would walk around the house with an impressive black eye the day after a particularly loud argument. He did love his mom, but after some time, he realized that there was simply no way they could stay together. When his parents got divorced he wasn’t allowed to partake in the court case.

They seemed to argue over the property for ages. In the end his mom got to keep the house, because her family lived there, but she wasn’t allowed to keep custody over Mobius, following the assault of his dad, the judge didn’t see her fit to care for a child either.

The following week Mobius and his dad had moved down to Texas. His dad had gotten a good job offer there from a branch of the company he was already working at, so it was very fortunate for the two of them. Obviously, Mobius hadn’t been happy about moving so suddenly. He still had friends back in his hometown and he knew nothing about the new city he was moving to, or anyone.
His dad had assured him it would be fine, but he had been sceptical. Luckily, his first day had gone by great so far.

‘So, Mobius, how was your first day? Did you meet any new people?’

Mobius could tell his dad was nervous, he hoped that his son would find new friends fast, he himself didn’t know a lot of people either, so they were in a similar situation.

‘Yeah, it was actually really good. I met this guy called Loki and we sat together in physics, he was really nice. I invited him to go jet skiing together with us at some point. I hope you don’t mind, but we understand each other really well and’

‘Of course that’s fine, Mobius, I’m just glad you're meeting new people.’

Mobius' dad interrupted him, when his son started rambling.

‘Thanks dad. I also met some other people, there was Hunter, she seems really nice, OB, I think he’s a bit of a nerd, Casey, he’s really nice too and- oh, Sylvie, she seems nice as well!’

‘Oh wow, I guess I don’t have to worry about you making friends then, you seem to be getting along with the other people quite well.’

Mobius' dad smiled, and Mobius felt kind of proud of himself, he made friends, which helped him feel less alone and new and it made his dad worry less about his situation. He knew how much the divorce had payed a toll on his dad, when they had first moved to Texas, his dad had explained how his mother had had an affair and Mobius’ dad had found out, but, for the sake of their reputation, they decided to not get a divorce, which led to the, always fighting and in the end, they had realized that it made no sense.

Additionally, Mobius' mom had taken some money from his dad’s bank account without him knowing and when he confronted her, she had denied everything. Another thing that was eventually proven in their court case.
He could sometimes hear his dad crying at night, he knew that, no matter how much his parents fought, he still loved his mom, and he always wanted to go and comfort him. He never did.
Mobius didn’t know how to comfort people, he was bad at it, displays of emotions usually made him uncomfortable and he never knew how to talk to a person who wasn’t feeling great. He had cried too, when he had to move away, never infront of anyone else, never for someone to see.
He was raised with a boys don’t cry attitude and never grew out of that. 

After they’re done unpacking what feels like a dozen more boxes and had all of the stuff stored away, which to Mobius’s relief finally contained his collection of jet ski magazines, some books, his duffel bag that he wanted to take to his first football practice on Wednesday and his laptop, he and his dad make some dinner.
None of them are great cooks, but they managed just fine and ended up with a quite bland, but still nice lasagne.

Mobius was exhausted, the day was long and he’s tired and finally wanted some sleep, but before he could close his eyes, he just quickly texted Loki, asking if they should hang out in the breaks on the following day. To his delight, Loki answers within the next quarter of an hour, so Mobius could send a quick ‘ great, see you tmrw!’ before he lied down and so much as immediately passed out the second his head hit the pillow. He dreams of the coast, water and some shiny black hair glistening in the sunlight, when he wakes up, he remembers none of it.

Chapter Text

Tuesday flew by in a hurry, Mobius was looking forward to his English periods, but before that he had Maths, which he surprisingly shared with OB. It was nice already knowing people, but all in all he seemed to get along with the rest of his course too. He exchanged a few words with some guys and found out the tall one with the buzzcut was also on the football team. He couldn’t wait till training.

At his old school he had been playing football for years, the sport wasn’t his favourite, but he liked being on a team, and that was the most fun part about it. When OB had asked Mobius if he wanted to tag along for their break, Mobius had declined, saying he was meeting with someone else. When he was walking towards the door, he saw Loki on the far end of the hall. He was walking in the same direction as Mobius was, so he couldn’t see the blond.

Suddenly, he saw another guy walk past him, and in doing so, very obviously bumping into Loki, making him fall into the wall of lockers next to him. Mobius wanted to say something, but they were probably twenty or thirty meters ahead of him. He started walking faster, but before he could reach them, he saw the boy, who had long black hair, grab Loki by the collar and sneer something to him, he could hear the bystanding people laugh and just when he had almost reached the spot. Loki wrenched himself free from the other guy and quickly hurried away. 

Mobius was more than puzzled, was Loki being bullied? That certainly looked like it, why would they do something about that, and why didn’t Loki defend himself? He quickly went after Loki, who was probably by now already by their meeting spot, he needed to ask the other. When he saw Loki already sitting on the bench at the front of the school, he sighed with relief. Some part of him had thought Loki might go somewhere to be alone after what had happened. ‘Loki!’ he called out and saw the other look his way, his expression completely blank. When Loki realized it was Mobius, he immediately lit up, smiling brightly at the other, Mobius seemed to look a bit concerned though. ‘Hey Mobius! There you are, I was starting to wonder.’ He joked and laughed slightly.

‘Yeah, I was held up by something, are you okay Loki?’
Mobius asked and Loki felt his blood freeze, surely Mobius hadn’t seen his small encounter with Hogun in the hallway. He decided to play it off.
‘Yeah, of course, why?’
Mobius looked at him seriously.

‘In the hallway just now, what was that about, do you need help with anything Loki?’
The raven didn’t know how to answer, he had hoped Mobius would never find out, he had been so happy that Mobius had met him and didn’t know of how the others treated him.
He was afraid. They had only known each other for a day, but he had never had a friend like this before. No one had willingly sat with him in his breaks, no one had texted with him. He had had a phone for years and yet the only contacts on it were his family members. He was also afraid that Mobius would stop being friends with him, if they bullied Loki like this, who said they wouldn’t do the same to Mobius, he was a new student, easy bait. So Loki decided to play it off, pretend like he didn’t know why Mobius was so concerned.

‘Ohh, that? No, don’t worry. Hogun is one of Thor’s close friends, we just joke around like that sometimes. Seriously.’

Loki tried to sound convincing, and lucky for him, Mobius seemed to believe him, nodding and changing the topic afterwards, sitting down next to Loki as they started eating their breakfast. 

They talked about their day so far, Loki telling him how excited he was for literature on Friday, which Mobius and he also shared, because they would be allowed to choose a piece of literature to write an essay about. Mobius didn’t know a lot about literature, he grew up only reading fantasy books, which he still read and never dabbled in older pieces. So he listened to Loki ramble about his favourite authors and pieces, sometimes giving input about the plot when Loki explained it and what he thought of the storyline. The taller boy seemed to be especially infatuated with Shakespeare's works, and even though Mobius had read Romeo and Juliet, that was years ago, and only because he had to for school.

But, even if he usually liked talking a lot, he found himself content with listening to Loki for the entirety of their break. It made him happy in a way, listening to the other talking so fondly of something he was interested in. He guessed this was similar to what he sounded like when he talked about Jet skis to just about anyone. Lucky for him, his dad liked them just as much and they could ramble on about them together for hours. But he decided that today was Loki’s turn to talk about his interests, he could always do so some other time. 

Far too quickly, the break was over, but luckily, they had two periods of English together right after this. On the way to their classroom, they continued talking. At this point they were talking about their favourite shows and adaptations. Even when their teacher told them to be quiet, they just continued talking in hushed voices. Mobius couldn’t remember the last time he had a conversation this long and this lively with anyone that didn’t include Jet skis. 

That reminded him. He had talked to his dad again about inviting Loki over to go Jet skiing with them and he had said that the weather was supposed to be really nice on the weekend, he had suggested to Mobius that they could head for the coast on Saturday and if Loki didn’t mind, he could tag along too. 

‘Hey Loki, by the way, if you have time, you could come Jet skiing with me and my dad this Saturday, the weather is supposed to be really nice and we wanted to check out the beach anyways.’
Loki smiled brightly at him.

‘Sure, I’d love to come! Do I need to bring anything?’ ‘I mean, maybe some swimming trunks, but you don’t need a wetsuit, I’m sure you can fit in dad’s old one. You two should be around the same height!’ Loki internally sighed, sure, he had swimming trunks, but he hadn’t gone out without something covering his arms for so long. So when Mobius mentioned a wetsuit, he could be excited for Saturday without worry. 

‘Great, could you message me your address later on? Then we’ll just come around and pick you up on Saturday, I don’t know exactly what time yet, but I’ll just text you if that’s fine with you.’ 

‘Yeah, of course! I haven’t been at the beach since last year, but I know some really awesome spots that won’t be too crowded. Should I bring something to eat? Then we could have a little picnic.’ Loki suggested, Mobius seemed to like the idea and they spent the rest of the period discussing their favourite foods. Mobius seemed to like just about anything.
Except brussel sprouts. He told Loki about how his grandma used to always make them for thanksgiving and she also always insisted on Mobius eating at least one portion. The mere thought of them had made him shiver with distaste. Loki had laughed at that, but had agreed somewhat.

Loki had said he would find some things to bring with him, since he knew how to bake and cook quite well. Mobius had told him about his not so great cooking skills and then about a time, where he had almost burnt down the entire kitchen in their old house, when he had wanted to warm up some leftover food in their microwave, which was inconveniently stored in an aluminum container. Now, Mobius could laugh about his stupidity together with Loki, he had only been in third grade at that time, and no one had been home in the moment he had set the dish into the microwave. Lucky for him, his dad had come home just as he pressed start and therefore when it started to spark up, his dad could quickly shut it off and tell the at that point eight year old Mobius why he should've put it on a plate.

Loki told him about stuff he did as a kid, how he used to cook and bake a lot with his mom and that that was how he got most of his baking skills. Mobius was impressed, he told Loki how his mom used to make the most delicious meals for the entire family when he was younger, but at some point stopped and now, since his dad always works full time, Mobius has to basically learn how to cook from scratch. 

‘I mean, if you want to, I could teach you how to cook, we could try out some recipes together.’ Loki offered, he hadn’t cooked anything in quite a while, and maybe this was a way of getting back into it, maybe even trying out some new recipes that he hadn’t tried yet. 

‘Oh, sure, I mean, if you’re up for it we could even do so today! There’s a supermarket on the way back home, so we could get some ingredients on the way back.’ Loki almost immediately nodded, he hadn’t been over at someone else's house in ages, and he thought that cooking something with Mobius would probably be really fun too. ‘Of course, that sounds good, I just have to text my mom really quick, you could maybe write some stuff down that you would want to try!’ Mobius agreed and started writing down some stuff on the side of his notebook, whilst Loki sneakily took his phone out of his pocket and texted his mom underneath the table. Hey mom, I’m going to have lunch with Mobius today, he’s new in school, so I won’t be home probably before dinner! :) 

To his luck, their teacher didn’t see him using his phone and his mother also almost immediately texted him back.

Okay! That’s fine by me, no one else would be home anyways, I’m still out with your aunt till tomorrow and I don’t think Thor or Odin will be home before dinner either. Just give Odin a call if he needs to pick you up. Have fun and send kind regards to this Mobius. Love mom 

Loki quickly put his phone away and turned back to Mobius, who had a small list done by now.

‘So, I know how to boil pasta, obviously, but I’d like to try making some sauces. Maybe some bolognese, or a cream sauce or something like that, so maybe we could start off with a sauce?’

He looked at Loki, a bit unsure of his decision, but Loki nodded at him understandingly.

‘That sounds like a good plan, so what about just some bolognese sauce for today? It’s not too hard and basically everybody likes it so it’s useful for other occasions too.’

‘Sounds good, we don’t need any complicated ingredients for that do we?’ ‘No, just some tomato sauce, some meat, some vegetables and pasta, that’s it.’

‘Okay, great, we don’t have the next two periods together, do you just want to meet in front of the parking lot after school?’ Loki nodded and they continued talking about some other stuff, actually doing what they were supposed to do every now and then, but only after their teacher shushed them for what felt like the twentieth time in a row. 

After the bell rang, Loki had to head up to the library to get some books and look something up for his following politics lessons, because they were going to write a short essay on a topic and Loki wanted to make sure he knew everything.

So Mobius went towards the cafeteria, it was really crowded and he just stood around, not finding the people he was looking for. Suddenly, he saw a hand waving at him, it was Hunter, who was waving him towards their table, where OB, Casey and Sylvie were already sitting. Relieved, that they were open for him sitting with them, he walked towards them and sat down opposite from OB.

‘Hey guys, thanks for letting me sit with you by the way.’

‘Oh, no problem, we know how hard it can be at a new school, especially only coming here this close to the end of the school year.’ Sylvie smiled.

‘You can always sit with us, you weren't just walking around alone during our first break were you?’ Casey asked, but OB interrupted him.
‘I already told you earlier he was just meeting with someone else guys!’

‘Ohh,right, sorry OB I totally forgot!’ Casey quickly chimed in.

'So, who were you with last break? Only your second day here and there are already romances blossoming or what?’ Hunter joked and Mobius turned red, before quickly defending himself.

‘No, no, obviously not! I was meeting with Loki, we share quite a few classes actually, I think he’s really nice, do you know him?’

The others looked at each other puzzled, shaking their heads.

‘No? He has black hair about this long,’ Mobius said, motioning for his shoulders, but the others still seemed clueless.

‘Uhm, quite tall, like three inches taller than me for sure.’ Mobius was starting to give up, the others still didn’t seem to know who he was talking about.

‘Oh, he said his brother is captain of the football team, I think his name is Thomas or something like that.’ Finally, the others' eyes seemed to light up.

‘Wait Loki, as in Thor’s brother? That’s crazy!’ Casey exclaimed first.

‘What do you mean, is it a weird thing?’ Sylvie sent him a conserved look.

‘Well, he isn’t exactly liked by just about anyone. None of us have ever shared a class with him, so we can’t really judge, but everyone knows that Thor’s friends have been giving him a really rough time.’

Mobius didn’t know how to respond, he had had his suspicions earlier, when the other guy had pushed Loki, but he had believed the raven when he had said that it was one of Thor’s friends and they always joke around like that, it had been a reasonable explanation, but now… He wasn’t sure what to think, he felt awful for Loki, but he didn’t know if the others wanted his pity, or even worse, how he could show it.

‘What? Since when has that been going on?’ He eventually asked in disbelief.

‘I mean, probably for a few years now to be honest, no one knows what started it, but Thor’s clique are really intimidating, so no one’s ever really said anything against it, they’re all a year older than we are too.’

Mobius wasn’t sure what to say, he hadn’t thought about why Loki had said that he could sit next to him in every class they shared. Now he knew that he had a seat free next to him in every class, because no one wanted to sit next to him. He knew he had to talk to Loki about it somehow,, help him somehow too, he just didn’t know exactly how.

Mobius decided then and there that he had to do something about Loki’s situation. He could distantly hear the others change the topic, and after some time, also how the bell finally rang. But he didn’t listen, he was just thinking about how to help him, what were Loki and he, friends? He’d like to think about Loki as one, he hoped he could be a friend to Loki too. 

Chapter Text

Mobius’s last two classes didn’t seem to want to end. And even if he usually enjoyed social studies and thought it was a pretty cool subject on its own, he was ready to curse it with the way the time seemed to stretch infinitely today. He just couldn’t stop thinking about what OB and the others had told him earlier. He noticed almost immediately that Loki would probably not be the most popular kid in school, especially not in Texas.

He had longer hair, which was very unconventional, and dressed more like he was going to go to a movie premier rather than high school. If Mobius had to use a word, he would probably describe Loki as flamboyant.
He didn’t mind the very obvious different aesthetic of the other boy. He actually kind of liked it. And even if he would never willingly trade in his khakis for a pair of fancy dress pants like Loki was wearing, he could admire the other boys' style just like he would do to the outfits on an actual movie premier that were sometimes shown on the TV.

But he hadn't thought that the other boy would be bullied, the way he had observed Loki, he was a very confident person and did what he liked best, not what others told him.
But then again, he hadn’t known Loki for long, only two days at this point, which was definitely not enough time to properly get to know someone else. But, no matter how little he knew a person, he did know that no one deserved to be treated like shit.
Earlier, when Hogun had pushed Loki into the locker, there were more than enough people standing around and yet, all they did was laugh, no one even helped him.

Mobius remembered what the others had said, about how everyone was afraid to do something against them and stand up for Loki, but looking back he thought that maybe that was just the way their group saw it. From what he could tell, they were all a bunch of outcasts, just not lonely like Loki. Maybe they were just afraid of doing something against Thor’s friends because they were already more of a lonely group and didn’t want to become that even more.

The other people he had seen earlier though weren't afraid, the way Mobius saw it, they were enjoying the way Loki was treated. Wording it like that, it sounded a bit sadistic in his mind, but he thought that it was probably fair to label them as such. He wasn’t yet sure how to help. Earlier, Loki hadn't told him what had actually happened and what the situation was, so he assumed that Loki didn’t want Mobius to know. 

When the final bell of the school day rang, he let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. As quickly as possible, he packed his bag and left towards the parking lots. At the front, he could already see Loki waiting for him, fidgeting with the belt piece of the long, black coat. When Loki saw Mobius, he seemed to lighten up and waved to him slightly as Mobius started a little jog, just to get to Loki faster. 

‘There you are, I was already thinking you would have left without me.’
Mobius knew it was a joke, but something in Loki's voice told him that maybe, some part of Loki had actually feared that scenario.

‘Yeah, I just had social studies, I had to come here from all the way on the other side of the building.’
They went through the car park, crisscrossing their way until they reached Mobius’s car. By coincidence they were on the passenger side, so when Mobius unlocked the car with his keys, he jokingly held up the door for Loki, making the other boy laugh at the gesture. ‘Well thank you dear sir.’
The raven said in an overly posh voice, whilst storing away his bag on the backseat and sitting down on the passenger seat.
‘You’re very welcome, Monsieur.’ Mobius said and bowed a bit, before closing the door and seconds later, sitting down on the driver's seat, laughing. 

The whole drive to the supermarket was filled with laughter, both of them still pretending to be in their roles and making each other crack up.
‘You know, I used to be in theater in middle school, have you ever done something on stage?’ Loki asked him, curiously. To that, Mobius could only laugh and shake his head.

‘No, not really, the only thing I ever did on stage was perform a christmas song on a recorder when I was I think in like second grade? I couldn’t even properly play, but my mom insisted on me playing an instrument, she gave up a year later.’

‘I can imagine that perfectly, seven year old Mobius trying to play jingle bells.’

Loki smirked and Mobius lightly hit him whilst they were pulling into the parking lot.

‘Hey you have to give me at least some credit, I did more than most people in my grade!’ Mobius exclaimed, pretending to be offended. ‘Have you ever played any instruments?’

‘Oh, yeah, I’ve been playing the fiddle for like, ten years by now?’
Loki shrugged and they continued walking towards the supermarket like it was nothing.

‘Ten years?! How come you didn’t mention it when I asked you about your hobbies?’

‘Well, I don’t really see it as a hobby, more of an obligation, my mother was the one who introduced me to it when I started school, but I only really continued playing for her.’ He told Mobius, still seemingly uninterested.

‘Oh my god, do you think you could play for me, I’ve never really heard anyone play fiddle!’
On any other day, maybe for every other person, Loki would have declined. Maybe with a boring excuse or just straight up denied the request.

But right now, with Mobius looking like him hearing Loki play could bring about all the wonders of the world, he simply didn’t have it in him to deny him such a request, he didn’t want to either. For the first time in ages, he actually wanted to do something for someone else that wasn’t driven by simply trying to prove himself like he had done for the last ten years. Everything he did was usually because Odin would compare Loki to Thor, then Loki would try to prove and live up to Odin. It was never enough for the man and then the cycle would repeat. But now, he actually wanted to play for Mobius.

‘Sure, I can bring it over on Saturday if you want to.’
‘I mean, obviously I want to, I’m sure it’ll sound great!’
Mobius said excitedly, before looking at the list of things they had to get.

They spent around thirty minutes inside of the supermarket, fifteen minutes of those spent bickering about what kind of pasta they wanted to have. In the end they just opted for some Spaghetti and called it a wrap.
When they were in the car again, Mobius offered the AUX cable to Loki and the two of them enjoyed the music in silence, sometimes humming and singing along with the current song.
Not long after, they pulled up to a tall skyscraper. Mobius quickly parked the car and the two of them went inside.
‘We should probably take the lift, our apartment is on the eleventh floor, I don’t think either of us could be bothered to walk all that way.’

Mobius said and Loki agreed, as the two of them huddled into the elevator, which was, as Loki noted, very small for a skyscraper of this size. Even with just the two of them inside, the space was less than overwhelming, making their shoulders brush against each other every few seconds.

Loki felt the other's body heat from where they touched and looked over to Mobius anxiously, what if it made the other boy uncomfortable? But Mobius didn’t seem to care or particularly notice either, so Loki sighed, a bit relieved and a second later, the elevator binged and the two of them exited it onto the hallway.

Suddenly, something brushed Loki’s leg and he let out a little squeal.

‘Oh, that’s just my neighbor's cat, she sometimes escapes.’
Mobius laughed and Loki felt his face redden from embarrassment.
The blond put down their groceries on the floor by the side and picked up the little ginger feline. He walked over to a door that was adorned with some nice fairy lights and a tacky foot mat. Loki was eager to find out who lived there. More or less to his surprise, a short, old lady opened the door, her hair long and gray and her clothing equally as colorful as her foot mat.

‘Hello Mrs Ortiz, I’m just here to return you cat, she was walking around in the hallway again.’ Mobius said and held his arms with the cat out to the old lady.
‘Oh, thank you dear, you’ve been such a help and you only moved in recently, I don’t know what I’d do without you.’ She smiled at him, taking the cat from Mobius’ arms, then craning her neck around the shorter boy to squint her eyes at Loki.
‘Is that your girlfriend Mobius? That was fast.’ She smiled at him and both Mobius and Loki synonymously turned red. Mobius was the first to say something.

‘NO! No, Mrs Ortiz, that’s Loki, he’s from the same school I go to.’
He quickly exclaimed and Loki was glad that Mobius had said something.
‘Oh, sorry dear you see I forgot my glasses, I just saw the long hair and…’ she trailed off, but Loki smiled at her politely.
‘Don’t worry Miss, it happens all the time.’ She then turned to Mobius.
‘You know what, actually I am happy for you, he seems nice.’ Mrs Ortiz then patted Mobius on the arm and disappeared into her apartment before either of the boys could process what she had meant. Loki seemed to be the first to notice and turned red again, trying to hide his face by staring at the tiled floor.

ˋWell-’
‘Oh god, I- sorry Loki, I’ Mobius started rambling, but Loki started laughing.
‘Seriously, Mobius, don’t worry, it’s another misunderstanding, it happens.’
‘Yeah sorry I just, I’m not  like that, I just don’t want her to get any wrong ideas.’
Loki didn’t really know how to answer that, the obvious statement that Mobius wasn’t comfortable with someone thinking he was into guys didn’t go unnoticed and it stung for some reason.

Loki just had to breathe for a second and remind himself that just because someone wasn’t queer they weren’t homophobic, maybe Mobius was still supportive, he hadn’t said anything about how he found it disgusting.
The raven assumed he himself was just so used to hearing negative things said about queer people, that it had become something close to normal. Loki just hoped that Mobius wouldn’t hate him if he found out.

‘Okay, here we are, it’s not perfect yet and there are still some boxes standing around, but it really is quite a nice apartment.’
Mobius grinned back at Loki, whilst he unlocked the door. Inside, Loki was greeted with a long hallway, branching off into multiple rooms, at the very end he could see the hall opening up into the kitchen, the black surface of the countertop reflecting the light that shone through the ceiling high windows.

‘You can put your shoes right here and your backpack into my room.’ Mobius said, leading Loki to the second door on the right. Mobius’ room was pretty spacey, the same ceiling high windows on the far end of the bedroom, with a queen sized bed against the windows. A little shelf was opposite the bed with a small TV on top.
To his right, there was a desk and a bookshelf, some posters stuck to the wall above and on the other side of the room there was a closet and another door, which Loki presumed led to a bathroom.
‘Your room is really nice, Mobius.’
Loki complemented, he did like the room a lot, the small decorations adding to the whole charm of it. He thought it really matched Mobius.

‘Thanks, I think I spent like two hours just to decorate the place, I think it was worth it though.’
Mobius grinned. ‘Uhm, where should I put this?’ Loki asked and held up his backpack.
‘Oh, just anywhere, you can put it by the desk.’
Mobius gestured towards his desk and put his own backpack there too.
‘Okay, let's get started then, shall we?’

Mobius asked and Loki grinned and nodded back. The two of them went into the kitchen and started preparing the sauce. They put on some music too, discovering that they in fact liked a lot of the same bands and genres, which led to the two of them singing along with the lyrics loudly whilst cooking.
Loki felt like something inside of him had been set on fire, but in a good way. He was actually enjoying his time, even enjoying felt like an understatement. He felt ecstatic, like his entire body was buzzing from it, he felt like he couldn’t rest, like he was so in awe of what he was feeling, that he himself couldn’t even handle it.

He felt like he could literally burst out of his own chest.
‘Hey, Loki, you okay, you’ve been grinning at me for like five minutes now.’
Mobius asked, but his gentle smile showed the other that it wasn’t an ill minded question. Loki’s face almost hurt from smiling, he felt his muscles relax as he answered Mobius.
‘Yeah, I’m fine, I guess just really really happy right now.’ Mobius felt a brighter smile appear on his face.
If what the other had said was true, that Loki had been bullied for years, how long must it have been since Loki had someone to hang out with like this and spend time with?

Loki's smile made his chest swell, and for some reason he felt really proud and really content.
He was the reason why Loki was this happy, and he hadn’t ever had a friend that he bonded with this quickly, never had a friend he was willing to do so much for.
Some might say that he was being overdramatic, he had only known the other for two days, but at this point, he was sure they would actually become the best of friends. He didn’t care what others thought of Loki, he wanted to see the other be happy like this all the time. He was funny, had great humor, a good taste in music and also was a nice person in general.

Mobius couldn’t see how anyone could hate a person so much they decided to make their life so much of a living hell. But for now, Mobius was content, seeing Loki enjoying himself and being this happy.

That was enough for him at this moment.

Chapter Text

Two hours later, Loki and Mobius sat down, finally enjoying their self made sauce. It wasn’t perfect and Loki said, to make it even better it would probably have to simmer for another few hours, but they were both hungry, and it was enjoyable like this too. Mobius was exhausted to say the least. He had never known it could take that long just to create a simple dish, when he, his dad or his mom cooked, it was usually at the end of the day and it had to be done fast, so there had never been time to properly cook something that would take more than half an hour.
The two of them were just talking about a band, laughing at a joke Loki made, when they heard a key in the lock turn. Mobius checked his clock, it was about four in the afternoon, so he knew his dad would be home soon, he hadn’t noticed how fast the time had flown by whilst cooking. He hadn’t told his dad that Loki would come over, but he just assumed that he would be fine with it, since Loki was coming over on Saturday, he wouldn’t have a problem with him coming over a few days either. 

The door opened and in stepped Mobius’ dad. From what Loki could see, he was a bit taller than the blond, but probably not taller than Loki himself. He had white hair, even though he didn’t look too old and was wearing a black suit, the office standard, Loki thought.

‘It smells  good in here, did you cook something?’

The man said, whilst taking off his shoes and putting them on the rack by the front door.

‘Yeah dad, I did, Loki helped me, he came over with me after school. That's okay, right?’
Mobius’ dad finally entered the kitchen, greeting Loki with a handshake, which the raven anxiously accepted. Saying that Loki felt anxious was an understatement, the only father he had really encountered in his life was his own, he didn’t know how he was supposed to act, he was afraid to say something wrong. What if he made Mobius’ dad angry, what if Mobius would be embarrassed by him because of it? In his mind, Loki started spiralling, but he was gladly pulled out of it by the man's voice.
‘You must be Loki then, Mobius told me all about yesterday. I'm really happy that he found friends so quickly at his new school, I was worrying a bit.’

Loki could feel his chest fill with happiness, Mobius’ dad considered him a friend! Neither Loki or Mobius had called each other a friend, maybe that was because they had only known each other for two days now, and usually, it took longer to get to know someone, but in all honesty, he felt like both of them already considered each other as friends.

‘It’s nice to meet you, uhm-’

‘Oh, sorry, I totally forgot to introduce myself, I’m Robert.’

Loki just nodded, he didn’t really know what to answer, and luckily, Robert seemed to notice that.

‘So, what did the two of you cook? I’m pretty sure my son does not possess the skills to create something that smells this good.’

Mobius gave his dad, who was standing next to him a smack on the shoulder, to which Loki flinched, he didn’t know how Robert would react to that. Loki's reaction almost went unnoticed, but Mobius saw the raven shrink together a bit in his peripheral vision and immediately lowered his hand from his dad's arm. But to Loki’s surprise, the man seemed completely unfazed, giving Mobius a grin.
‘I can cook, dad. Obviously Loki helped me, but we made some Spaghetti with Bolognese sauce. There’s still plenty left, you can have some too if you want too.’
Mobius said back in a kind of joking manner, though Loki’s reaction didn’t flee from his memory, he was just joking around with his dad, nothing unusual. But the other boy had been a bit jittery from the moment that Mobius’ dad had entered the apartment, maybe he was just nervous about meeting new people. Robert went and grabbed himself a bowl of Spaghetti and Bolognese sauce, sitting down next to Mobius whilst he started eating. Loki hadn't said a word since the simple greeting to his dad earlier, he seemed a bit more relaxed though, Mobius noted.

His dad tasted the food, and immediately looked up to Loki delighted.
‘This is probably the best sauce I’ve tasted in a long time, you should come over some more, maybe you could teach Mobius some other stuff too, your cooking really is great!’
Robert exclaimed and Loki smiled gently, he nodded his head and gave a small ‘thank you’ back. ‘You know dad, we were planning on that anyways, I’m sure you won’t mind though, will you?’ Mobius said, but with the reaction his dad gave just a second ago, he was sure that the approval wouldn’t be a problem.
‘No of course not, Loki, you can come over as often as you want to, seriously, not just to cook.’ Loki smiled brightly.
‘Thank you, I hope I won’t bother you though.’
‘No, of course not. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I still have to finish up some work, Mobius, Loki can gladly stay for dinner, could you drive him home later, I didn’t see two cars earlier.’

Loki, for some reason felt embarrassed that he didn’t own a car, he knew it wasn’t because he wanted to show off wealth or anything like that, but for some reason, he thought it made him look like he had achieved less than others. Mobius nodded, and with that, his dad excused himself and went into a room on the left side of the corridor, an office, Loki assumed.

‘So, Loki, what do you want to do now? It's already half past four and I’m really exhausted, if you want to, we could just watch something together.’
Loki was exhausted too, today had started off not so great, the fact that Mobius had seen the incident with Hogun had for him been worse than the situation itself, he still shivered at the idea of Mobius finding out about the true nature of the treatment he was given by their upperclassmen. But other than that, it had been a great day and he hadn’t felt this happy in ages, he had been so nervous about meeting Mobius’ dad, but even that had gone great, he seemed really nice and had also been friendly to Loki, even inviting the raven over to their home again.
‘Sure, I’m really exhausted too, just watching something sounds good.’

‘Great, let’s just clear away these bowls and then we can lie down.’ Mobius said and they stood up, quickly clearing away the dishes and clearing away the rest of the stuff that was still lying around the kitchen counter. When they were done, Loki assumed they would sit down on the couch and watch something there.

The couch was quite big and the TV hanging on the wall opposite it was too. Instead, Mobius steered directly for his room. Loki didn’t question it and just followed the blond into his room. Mobius sat down on his bed, moving all of the pillows that were splayed across the mattress in front of his headboard and patted the space next to himself.
‘You can just sit down here, there’s enough space.’
Loki nodded and sat down next to Mobius, sinking into the comfortable mattress and leaning against the whole mountain of pillows. He could feel Mobius lying next to him, already halfway underneath his duvet. For some reason, Loki thought it looked warm and comfortable. ‘So, any suggestions?’ Mobius asked, his voice already sluggish and the tiredness seeping through the words.

‘Not really, I’ll go along with anything you want to watch, I’m sure it’ll be fun.’
Loki smiled and Mobius nodded, reaching over Loki to grab the remote control from the night stand next to him. He scrolled through Netflix for a while, before choosing a movie that Loki recognized as Sonic. Of course Mobius would like Sonic, it somehow fit his personality.
‘I like this one, I’m sure you’ll like it.’
‘I’m sure I will.’
Loki answered and relaxed against the pillows whilst the movie started. Not even ten minutes later, he could hear Mobius’ breathing slow down.

When he looked over to the other boy, he was fast asleep, his chest rising and falling slowly, his head tilted in Loki's direction, the short trends of his hair falling into his face, the styling he did this morning losing its strength. He thought the other looked peaceful like this, even though Loki thought that Mobius always had a kind of gentle aura to him, the way he talked and acted just brought a kind of peace over Loki, that he hadn’t ever really experienced with anyone before. Loki decided to just let the other boy sleep, he had probably already seen the movie, so he could use this time to rest.

Before he knew it, the movie was already over, when he checked the time, it was already past six in the evening, he would have to get home in a bit.
No matter how much he disliked it, he would have to wake Mobius up, he didn’t want to disturb the other boy, but he would have to get home somehow, and he didn’t really want to call his dad. He gently shook the other boy’s shoulders, leaning over him a bit whilst calling out his name.
‘Mobius, wake up.’
he said, trying to still be as quiet as possible.

The other boy opened his eyes slowly, stirring with sleep as he looked around his room a bit confused before focusing on Loki’s face.
‘Oh, hey Loki. God, sorry I fell asleep,you could have just woken me up, I really don’t mind.’
Mobius smiled and rubbed his eyes, trying to get some of the sleep out of his eyes.
‘No, I didn’t want to disturb you, you seemed really tired already, the movie was very good though, you have good taste.’

Loki answered and Mobius just nodded.

‘Fair enough, I was very tired, a short nap probably doesn’t hurt, what time is it?’

‘It’s quarter past six right now, I’ll probably need to get home in a bit.’
Loki said, but suddenly, he didn’t want to bother Mobius whilst the other was still so tired, so he added.

‘But you really don’t have to bring me home, you seem tired, I can just call my dad.’
He wouldn’t have normally done this, usually, he would consider his dad his last option, if even one, but he was willing to do so in favour of Mobius.

‘No, that’s fine, Loki, I already promised to bring you back home. If you want to, we could hang out at your place at some point too, so then I can already know the way to your place!’
The blond augmented and Loki didn’t miss the implementation that Mobius would like to hang out with him again.

‘Okay, fine.’
He grinned and the two of them stood up, Mobius stretching a bit to move his sleepy limps.
‘Alright then, let’s go.’
he said and Loki nodded, grabbing his backpack that was still standing next to Mobius’s desk. As the two of them were heading out, Mobius quickly told his dad he would bring Loki home now.
When they exited the building, they could see the sun still high in the sky, given the time of year, it would probably not set until ten at night. 

‘So, where do you need to go, you can just put your address in’, Mobius offered, as he handed Loki his phone, that would probably be easier than Loki having to point him the directions the whole time.
‘Here you go, the drive isn’t too long, only around twenty minutes.’
Loki said as he handed the phone back to Mobius. He started driving, the two chattering about all kinds of stuff whilst simultaneously listening to music.
Soon enough, they were pulling into a nice neighbourhood, Mobius immediately noticed how big and extravagant the houses were, he also didn’t miss the expensive sports cars that were parked in front of basically every single house. It felt like he had just entered a completely different world.

A few minutes later, they arrived. Loki’s house was massive, white marble decorating the outside and two sports cars parked on the long front porch. It made Mobius wonder why Loki didn’t own a car, if even his brother had one? But he decided not to dwell on it, instead giving a goodbye to Loki.
‘We’ll see each other tomorrow?’ He asked and Loki nodded enthusiastically.
‘Sure, thanks for dropping me off, I had a lot of fun today, till tomorrow!’
He said and jumped out of the door, heading for the entrance of the house, pulling out a key from his pocket. Before he entered, he turned around one more time and waved to Mobius, who smiled and waved back before driving off. 

The light in the living room was still on and Loki could hear the TV running, a narrator talking over what he assumed was a football match. Before he could even take off his shoes, he could hear someone walking towards him, quickly, he looked up, only to see Odin standing in front of him, looking what could only be described as not very happy.

‘And where have you been, boy?’ Loki could tell by the tone of his voice that he was mad, he knew he had to be careful.
‘I was over at a friend's house.’ He said slowly, apparently, that was not the answer Odin wanted to hear.

‘And what were you thinking not informing me? I came home to not only no lunch, but absolutely no one in the house either!’

His voice was raised, internally, Loki wanted to run away, but he knew he had to stand up for himself.
‘It’s not my job to make you lunch and you know that, Thor is allowed to not come home after school either, he has been since he turned fifteen, why shouldn’t I?!’
Loki was mad now, he had enough of Odin treating him like he could decide everything about Loki.

‘At least Thor does something for this family, he is more mature and amounts to more, he’s allowed to stay out after school because he actually has people to spend time with.’

Odin was practically yelling at him at this point, and even if Loki had gotten used to it at this point, this remark hurt. Of course he knew that he didn’t really have friends, and at some point his parents must have noticed too, but using it against him and forbidding him stuff because of it? That was too far. Loki could feel the blood boil underneath his skin, his fists clenching at his sides as he looked up at Odin.
‘What if I have friends, huh? Are you going to forbid me from meeting with them?’ He snarled up at the man. ‘I’m surprised that anyone would want to be your friend after how you ruined your own social status with how you’re being treated at school!’ Loki’s blood froze, what had Odin meant by that, did he know how Thor's clique handled him?
‘What do you mean by that?’ He spat at the man in front of him.

‘Oh, don’t pretend, I’ve gotten enough calls from your teachers to know what’s going on.’
Loki couldn’t believe it, had his parents known all this time? Why hadn’t they said anything, he felt like he had been lied to for ages.
He could feel his eyes stinging, he quickly shoved himself past Odin, grabbing his bag and heading up the stairs, almost bumping into Thor, who was standing at the top of the stairwell, eyes wide, but Loki ignored him, entering his room and shutting the door, locking it before sinking down to the floor, tears finally breaking the dam.

Chapter Text

The carpeted floor of Loki’s room seemed too warm, his skin sensitive and face heating up from the tears falling freely down his cheeks. He could already feel the headache he would undoubtedly wake up with and the bags that would be very visible underneath his eyes. He would put some cold flannels on them once he calmed down, like he always did, hoping that would soothe the reaction by the time he had to get up the following morning. 

But there was also something else, an itch, so close underneath his skin that he could almost place where it was and scratch at it. But he knew no scratching would get rid of it. Almost once a week, sometimes more often for the past couple of years he had known this feeling. It made him tense, like he was on pressure and like he could burst at any given moment.
A few years ago, when he was about thirteen, he had realized what that feeling was. He knew as a child that some people harmed themselves, he thought they were dumb and immature.

Then he found out why, and suddenly, it made sense to him. It hadn’t been a common thing at first, he had only lashed out on himself, when big arguments occurred, when he had a particularly bad day, but over time, it became less uncommon, happening every now and then and even when he just felt like it, when he didn’t have a set reason other than feeling like it. 

He slowly stood up, feeling lightheaded from the crying. Loki slowly made his way over to the door on the side of his room, leading to his bathroom. The door creaked slowly when he opened it, almost slumping against the wall when he entered, switching on the light with his shoulder. The room seemed unusually small, smaller than it usually was and the walls seemed to move a bit, leaving him now choice but to shake his head, trying to stabilize himself.
He knew what he was looking for, a small metal box, stashed away in the cupboard behind the mirror, carefully placed behind some painkillers and an extra pack of toothpaste. This meant that even if someone were to look for something in his bathroom, which also never occurred, they probably wouldn’t find it, and therefore also wouldn’t find out about his not so little secret.
He let the box fall into the sink, the metal making an uncomfortably loud noise as it hit the marble. On any other occasion, he would have maybe freaked out over the loud sound, but right now, he wasn’t concentrating on that. His hand clutching the silver shining object, as he rolled up his sleeves.

The bumps underneath his fingers were jagged, having healed over time, just not as flat as he would have liked them too. Not another sob left his mouth, only the tears streaming down his face and dropping down into the sink below, together with the red that he pulled from his skin. The first time his mouth opened again, he let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding, followed by gasps, like he was trying to get air, as he held his arm under the stream, the water slowly turning from a dark red to transparent again. He sank down onto the floor, landing back against the cabinet as he tried to breathe, his lungs feeling like they were being pulled together with a string and his windpipe was split in half. He tried to stand back up, raising his hands and letting the still running water collect inside his palms, before splashing it onto his face, making him calmer and less panicky.

When he went to bed, his head felt heavy, his eyes too sore, and his arms too big, the gauze and bandages almost bulging out the relatively thin jumper he had put on when he had gotten changed. He fell asleep almost immediately, missing the soft knock on his door just a few minutes later, and a concerned looking Thor trying to enter his room, only to find it locked, making him leave Loki to himself. 

The next day, Mobius immediately noticed how down Loki seemed to be more silent in his presence. The two of them were sitting underneath a stairwell together. It seemed someone had been there before, as two bean bags were occupying the floor, on which the two boys were sitting, eating their lunch and holding a simple conversation.
The raven didn’t talk as much, he didn't even seem close to as happy as he had been when they had made food the day before. He wasn’ sure whether to ask Loki though, but eventually decided for it.

‘Hey, Loki, how are you feeling?’ Mobius asked, seemingly ripping Loki out of his trance he was in. He hadn’t been completely listening to Mobius for the past five minutes, staring at the blond boy's face, but not in a concentrated way, more of a zoned out way. At his words, Loki looked up and nodded slowly.
‘Yeah, I just didn’t sleep well tonight.’

He shrugged and smiled slightly, but Mobius immediately noticed how the muscles in the upper half of his face didn’t move a bit.
‘You sure? You know, you can talk to me if you want to, seriously, I don’t judge.’
Loki seemed conflicted, he was sure he could trust Mobius, the blond had earned his trust, even in the few days the two had known each other.
He just didn’t know if he wanted Mobius to know about him, but eventually decided that he wanted, no, needed Mobius to know about this. Odin’s attitude towards him had worsened in the past few weeks.

Loki was used to his fathers both verbal, as well as physical abuse, he had gotten used to it, at least he thought so. When the comments, the fighting and all the other stuff became more frequent, he wasn’t sure how to deal with it anymore.
He had read how talking could help with some problems, so maybe talking about it with the one person he trusts currently would help him too.

In the past, he had thought about a therapist, he had even gone so far as look up some in his area, but the idea was kicked out of his head at lightning speed when Odin had rambled on and on about how the modern generation of men were way too weak and getting a therapist made people pathetic. Loki knew that he at least wanted one person to know why he would end his life by summer. He had already decided on no goodbye notes, except one for Frigga.

She always looked out for him,even though she never said anything against Odin’s behavior, she only ever came to him afterwards to comfort him and tell him that her husband didn’t mean it like that.

But no matter how much he loved his mother, this was the one thing he never believed her with.

‘I had a fight with my dad yesterday, after I came back.’
He confessed. Mobius, for some reason wasn’t surprised, he himself didn’t completely know why, just something about the way Loki acted in the presence of an adult gave it away, at least to Mobius.
‘He said I needed to be home by lunch, you know, cook something because mom wasn’t home. I just said I was allowed to do my own things, I mean, my brother is allowed to do his own things, and he has been ever since he was younger than me.’
Loki said, nervously looking down at his hands, picking at the scabs on his nails. Mobius gently grabbed his hand, lifting it away from his hand and looking Loki directly in the eyes. 

‘You know, that’s seriously just favoritism, it’s not your fault at all, believe me.’
He said, still holding Loki’s hand as he spoke, his words actually calming down Loki in a way the raven couldn’t explain properly.
He smiled at Mobius slightly, the smile still not completely reaching his eyes, but at least he felt a bit better now.
He had left the part about his relapse out, if you could even call it a relapse.
He didn’t want to burden Mobius with that either.

‘Thanks, Mobius, seriously it means a lot to me.’
He exclaimed, his voice still a bit strained, but less tense now.
‘Of course, Loki, don’t mind me asking, but does this happen more often?’
Mobius knew this might step over the line, but he knew this was the only way he could ask Loki about it, without bringing it up in future conversations.
‘Yeah’ came back with a simple answer.

Loki was very reserved, Mobius knew he wouldn’t be getting any more out of Loki, but he was fine with that, he didn’t want to push the other too far.
‘Is there any way I can help you, seriously, I want to help you, I’m just not sure how.’
Mobius said, looking at Loki, a bit unsure of it himself. Loki looked back at his hands, one of which was still held by Mobius, the warmth of the other boy spreading from his fingertips, warming him slightly.
‘I don’t know. I don’t think you can do that much against it. Maybe I could talk to you if I fight with him again?’
He said and looked up at the shorter boy.

Despite Loki looking a lot more confident from the outside. Just a few days of getting to know the other had proven him otherwise. The unusual style and the way he carried himself overshadowed the way he felt.
Mobius had realized that Loki was good at acting, hiding his feelings, but it also wasn’t very hard to look through, he guessed that no one had ever properly cared to look at Loki that directly, so the raven had never had to perfect that skill.
But Mobius was glad to hear Loki’s request, he had to be honest in saying that, if Loki had asked him to stop his father, he wouldn’t have known how to.
‘Sure, you can just call me, or text me, or anything, if you want to I can come over and pick you up, we can go somewhere, I don’t know, you can sleep over, anything. Just tell me, alright?’
Mobius smiled at him and Loki nodded, eyes teary, ‘Thanks, Mobius, that means the world to me.’
Loki’s voice had an audible crack, his bottom lip and chin trembling and Mobius let go of the other boy’ s hand, opening his arms up for the other.

Loki seemed to be uncertain for a split second, before looking up at Mobius one more time and letting himself fall into the others arms. Mobius wrapped his arms around the other boy, who was, at this point, gently crying into his shoulder. The blond decided to rub circles on Loki’s back with one hand, whilst the other one was slowly rubbing up and down the back of his hair and head, which was now laid on top of his shoulder.

‘Hey, it’s fine, really, I’d do all that for you, no questions asked.’ he said and could feel Loki slowly nodding into his shoulder.
‘I know, that’s why It makes me so happy.’
Mobius couldn’t help but feel a weird sense of pride in his chest, he didn’t know what exactly it was, he wasn’t sure if it even was pride or something else that he couldn’t name.
But either way, he just stayed there with Loki.

Luckily, by the end of their break, the raven had calmed down quite a bit, and its eyes were still slightly red and swollen, but it wasn’t as visible as it had been a few minutes prior.
Unfortunately, they didn’t share the last two periods and after that, Mobius had his first ever football practice at his new school, of course, he was excited, but at this point, he would rather be off school earlier, so he and Loki could immediately spend some time together.
But he also knew that he couldn’t actually and properly protect the other boy from his father.
He had never met the man, but from everything he had heard about Odin, it didn’t seem like he was all too nice, especially not towards Loki.
The two of them kept sitting like that, arms around each other, Loki leaning into Mobius’s chest, calming his breathing down until it could almost be mistaken for sleeping.
By the time the bell rang, neither of them wanted to leave, but what choice did they have?

‘Hey, Loki, how about I pick you up after football practice? Or if it’s nicer for you, we could spend some time at your place.’
Mobius smiled down at Loki, even though he could only see the top of the others head.
‘Yeah, I’d like that, how about we decide spontaneously? You can just come round to mine and we can decide then.’
Loki suggested, his voice muffled by Mobius’s t-shirt.
‘Sounds great, Loki, I guess we'll see each other later then.’
The blond said as the two of them stood up, untangling from each other and grabbing their bags, heading for their respective classes. Loki’s face was red and hot, he blamed it on the crying.
When he looked over at Mobius, the other boy was totally fine. Loki knew he had to stop this weird infatuation he had with a boy he barely knew. But then again, Mobius knew more about him than most people did. Even his own family by blood. 

The rest of the day went by in a blur, Loki went home, made lunch and sat at the table, alone and tired.
He had slept enough, no questions asked, but this tiredness wouldn’t go away through sleep. He could get rid of it for moments at a time, he had done so more than ever in the last few days, but the second he was back, he couldn’t hang onto that feeling.
It made his days miserable, like he had no reason, or will to continue.

Which, in all honesty, he didn’t have and hadn’t had for a long time, there was a reason he had a plan, it wasn’t a plan b. It was the only thing he was looking forward to, and maybe also the moment the doorbell rang and Mobius would stand outside, willing to spend time with him and maybe go for a drive, watch something together, cook together, talk.

Even listen to Loki. Maybe just exist in each other's presence, without doing anything in particular.
Suddenly, without having done anything special, he could feel a smile spread across his face. He was almost grinning, with no reason, he was still alone, still sitting in the kitchen with his miserable boring lunch, he didn’t know what he had done differently. Because Loki himself hadn’t done anything, he knew who had though. His mind wandered to blond hair glistening in the sunshine.

Chapter Text

It was almost four in the afternoon, when Loki could hear a car pull up into the driveway, the door slamming shut and the bell ringing just a few seconds later.
The raven was sitting at his desk, but the second it rang, he made his way downstairs, practically ripping the heavy front door open. There stood Mobius, hair still wet from showering, falling into his face and not like the usual styled up hairstyle he wore. His face was still a bit flush from practice and his one arm was still outstretched towards the doorbell.
‘Hey Loki, how are you?’
He asked, smiling at the other boy as Loki invited him inside.
‘I’m okay, it’s still quite quiet in the house at this time, Thor doesn’t come home till half past and mom and dad don’t either till probably around six.’

Mobius took off his shoes and followed Loki who was guiding him up a big flight of stairs and into a room that he assumed was Loki’s.
‘Yeah, so this is my room, you can sit down wherever you want. Any ideas on what to do?’
Loki asked, his voice seemingly unsure of what to say. Mobius thought about it for a moment, looking around in the other boy’s room. It matched Loki. Big, dark wooden bookshelves and a giant closet taking up the entire wall of the room. A desk with a computer standing on top. A music stand in one corner. There were some posters, but as Mobius looked around some more, he noticed there was a lack of personal décor, like someone had only recently moved in and had only the most necessary things set up, or like someone was about to move out.

‘I’m not too sure either, I mean, we could just play a game or something, maybe watch something?’ Mobius said and pointed over to the TV on Loki's wall opposite his bed.
'This time, you could choose:’ He grinned. ‘Sure, I’d like that.’
Loki said and the two of them sat down together, Loki immediately putting on a show about some alien doctor. Mobius didn’t quite understand, but still enjoyed the episodes, laughing along with the jokes. The show was actually quite good, maybe he would have to continue watching it at some point on his own.
‘Hey, how was practice?’ Loki asked Mobius, turning his head towards the blond from where he was sitting.

The two of them were sprawled out over Loki’s bed, there being more than enough space for the two of them. Mobius found he actually kind of preferred Loki’s pillows, they were very soft and Loki had also given Mobius an extra pillow, because he kept bumping his head on the edge of the headboard.
‘Yeah, I mean, it was actually quite fun, I enjoyed it. The team seems to be really nice overall too. I met your brother too, Loki. Didn’t talk to him that much, but he made an effort to introduce me, seems nice.’
Mobius smiled and Loki felt relieved when he heard that. He had been so worried that the other teammates would give Mobius a hard time because he hung out with Loki. Not a lot of people seemed to have noticed how good friends they were becoming, but the few times they had walked together in the hallways, they had gotten some judging looks. Mobius had luckily never seemed to notice, but Loki did, always.

Somehow he had thought that if he just got stared at often enough, that he would get used to it, but no matter how often it happened, he never did. They always left him feeling extremely bad, embarrassed even, it made him feel like he couldn’t walk around school at all. He wanted to stay at home simply because he was ashamed of walking around at school.
‘That’s nice, Thor isn’t home yet, he’ll probably have to discuss some stuff with the coach, or he’s over at Jane’s.’ He said, before quickly adding ‘His girlfriend’, when Mobius looked at him confused. ‘Yeah, he seems to be quite busy, he did quite a lot on just this training alone.’ Mobius said.  

The two of them continued watching the show, Mobius dozing off a bit every now and then. Loki just smiled at him, he knew Mobius was tired, the training had seemed to have taken everything out of him, so Loki just let him sleep, his chest slowly rising and falling as time went on. Suddenly, he heard a knocking at his door, when he looked at the alarm clock on his bedside table it only just read five in the afternoon. Too early for his parents to be home, so it could only be Thor.
The raven quickly looked over at the blond, who was still silently sleeping, the show they were watching still running in the background. Loki turned down the volume and got up, walking towards the door and opening it. Just as he had suspected, it was Thor standing outside of his room, a frown showing, evident with how his brows were furrowed together and the sides of his lips turned downwards.
‘Hey, Thor, what do you want?’
Loki asked, puzzled, he couldn't think of anything, but then it hit him.
Yesterday, when he was consumed by betrayal, anger and sadness, he had completely forgotten the fact that Thor had stood at the top of the stairs, having probably listened to Loki's conversation with Odin.

Loki's heart sank, he didn't want to talk about this with Thor, but he knew he had to. With one quick glance back at the boy currently sleeping on his bed, he closed the door and faced his brother.
‘I think you know what, Loki. What was that Yesterday?’
Thor said, not caring to lower his voice, not that he needed to, Thor thought only Loki and he were home.
‘It's nothing serious Thor, really, there were some kids who were being a bit mean to me, but it's all okay now.’
Loki said, a cold expression on his face. He didn't care how much he hated Thor's friends for what they did to him, but he didn't know how Thor would react to that. He couldn't tell. For all he knew, Thor could laugh at him and the next time Hogun, Fandral or Volstagg would pick on him, he would gladly join in. Thor, however, just gave him a scoff.
‘Loki, stop lying and tell me what's going on.’
The other boy seemed agitated at this point, Loki knew that Thor would get easily agitated if someone was obviously lying to him, he still didn't care.

‘Seriously, keep out of my business.’ Loki said, turning back around, wanting to just hide inside of his room.
‘Loki!’ Thor said, voice raised, as he grabbed his brother's arm and spun him back around.
‘Please, tell me, seriously.’ His voice was soft, it sounded concerned and not at all the usual loud and boastful voice. It hurt Loki when he turned away from Thor.
‘It's nothing, Thor, just leave me alone.’ He said and opened the door to his room.

Maybe in the heat of the moment a bit too enthusiastically. Loki could practically feel Thor's eyes dig into the back of his head the second after he spotted Mobius lying on his brother's bed. Passed out and snoring slightly. Loki quickly shut the door again, slowly turning around and back to face Thor, his face bright red. Thor looked at the closed door for a moment, evidently very confused, then he turned to look back at Loki.
‘Was that the new guy from the football team? Mobius was it?’ He said slowly, but to Loki's relief it didn't sound angry, it didn't sound disgusted either. Just a simple question and nothing more. ‘Yes, it is, what about it?’ Loki asked, trying to sound uninterested, but his heart was beating so fast he thought it would drop out of his chest any moment. His face felt even hotter than a few moments ago. Surprisingly, Thor just nodded, a big grin spreading across his face.
‘I mean, I didn't think he'd be gay, but good for you, Loki. He seemed really nice.’

Loki's mouth fell slightly, before he tried to quickly explain himself.
‘Oh god, Thor, he's not, seriously, he just fell asleep when we were watching something’
Loki waved around with his hands. Thankfully, Thor just nodded, but then he looked like he had more questions, questions Loki really didn't want to answer.
‘But, are you? I mean, like, gay?’ It seemed a genuine question. It still made Loki feel sweat form on his nape. He started scratching at his fingers, looking at his feet and avoiding Thor's eyes.
‘No, not exactly, I think I still do like girls, just not just girls.’ He let out a breath and slowly looked back up at his brother.

Thor nodded. ‘Bisexual, yeah. Jane told me about that once, she used to date a girl, too, but you know, obviously, she's dating me now.’
Thor started rambling, but Loki just felt relieved, he had been so afraid of telling Thor or just anyone in his family about his orientation, he was just glad that Thor seemed to be supporting. Loki had never known his girlfriend, Jane was bi too, it made him a bit relieved, that way Thor knew about it and didn't seem to mind either.
Suddenly, a thought came to mind and his blood ran cold.
‘Thor, wait, please, don’t tell dad.’
Thor immediately noticed how panicked Loki sounded, his younger brother had a tendency to panic quickly, not that Thor had noticed over the past year, Loki and he barely even talked anymore. Most of the times he did hear Loki, he was arguing with their dad. It was starting to become concerningly frequent, the loud voices traveling up to Thor’s room so he could hear them often. Never what they were talking about, only ever that they were arguing.
The argument yesterday had been one of the first ones he’d actually heard the content of, and what he had heard had shocked him. Loki was being bullied? Why had Thor never noticed that before?
Sure, he never really saw Loki at school, most of the time, he wouldn’t even see his brother in the hallways, it was like he was magically avoiding Thor.
But just a few minutes ago Loki had denied anything of the sorts, Thor knew he wouldn’t get anything out of his brother for now, he would just try to find Loki at school and maybe keep an eye on him. He knew Loki’s concern about their father, often enough had he said some stuff that was clearly hostile towards people of the community, it made sense that Loki didn’t want him to know.

‘I won’t, Loki, you can trust me on that one. It’s not my secret to tell, and until you do, I won’t tell a soul, not even Jane.’ Loki nodded, thankful for Thor’s reaction, he knew he could trust him with this, at least, he hoped so. Thor went to his room and Loki returned to his room, and also the still sleeping Mobius, who was starting to stir.

When he woke up and looked around, he seemed surprised.
‘Oh god, so sorry Loki, I keep falling asleep on you!’ Mobius hastily apologized, but Loki just grinned.
‘I get it, Mr. sporty, you can sleep if you want to, I don’t mind.’ He said as Mobius yawned, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. He stood up and switched off the TV, which was still running silently in the background.
‘No, seriously, Loki, I keep wasting the time we could have spent together actually doing something while constantly falling asleep, I did the same yesterday for god's sake!’
The other boy sounded frustrated now, which made Loki laugh and pat Mobius’s shoulder.
‘Seriously, it’s fine I don’t mind just spending time together, we don’t have to do things the whole time if you're too tired, but I’d honestly like spending time with you, even if you're asleep, then not at all.’

Loki confessed and Mobius gave him a cheesy grin. The two of them spent the rest of the afternoon playing video games on Loki’s console and for dinner the two of them drove to a McDonalds. When Loki came back, Frigga was already home, so Odin didn’t say anything about Loki not being home for dinner.

The day’s flew by, some better, some worse. Hogun, Fandral and Volstagg still picked on Loki sometimes, but it seemed to lessen, he also thought he now saw Thor a lot more times in between classes. On Saturday, Loki went Jet skiing with Mobius and his dad. It was overall very funny, the two laughed in the sun and when Mobius showed Loki the controls, Loki couldn’t ignore how his skin flared up when Mobius held his hands and showed him how to steer it.
To Loki, it felt like the weeks flew by, him and Mobius hung out almost every single day, spending time together in silence, but also doing a lot of fun and new stuff, things that Loki thought he would never get a chance to do because he simply didn’t have anyone to do them with. Before Loki knew it, three weeks had passed, and there were only two months left until summer break.

Loki knew what that meant for him, but he decided he wanted to enjoy them as much as possible. The two of them spent a lot of time together, and their bond seemed to just get impossibly stronger, even after only such a short friendship. Loki had never felt like he had a friend this close, and even Mobius, who had had a lot of friends back at his old school, had never felt this way about a friendship before. He knew that there were some things that Loki hadn’t told him yet, but he also knew that the raven would eventually, he didn’t want to stress Loki into telling him stuff.

Chapter Text

Loki slowly rubbed his eyes, trying to get the sleep out of them. After five seconds, he willed himself to move his arm over the side of his bed to switch off the alarm that had been beeping for the past five minutes. It was nine in the morning, it being Saturday, he had been able to sleep longer than he usually could. Not that he usually slept till nine on the weekends, normally he would still be up at seven at the latest.
But, he and Mobius had been to the movie theatre the night before, watching whatever horror movie was on, Mobius screaming so often that by the end of the movie, the two of them were glad they weren’t kicked out. They had gone to a restaurant after, a nice small one, but still fancy.
They had shared a portion of smoked salmon and Mobius had a big salad and Loki a ciabatta sandwich. They had started visiting that restaurant a lot in the past few weeks. One night, after Loki had had another meaningless fight with Odin and Mobius picked him up, they drove past it and Mobius suggested having something to eat in order to cheer Loki up.

The food had been amazing and the twins working there, Wanda and Pietro, were always nice to them, seeing as they were about their age too. The four of them had exchanged numbers and had started texting in their free time. Now, whenever Mobius and Loki would go and eat there, there would be an extra dessert that would somehow just appear on their table, but not their bill, they always tipped the two enough as a thanks. 

Loki slowly got up, he had planned to meet up with Mobius today, he had said that some of his other friends would tag along too. Loki hadn't officially met them yet, Mobius had told him about OB and the others and he had seen them and heard their names in school, but he didn’t share any classes with them, so he never got to talk to them.
He got dressed, wearing something casual, still keeping the long sleeves, Loki at this point knew he could trust Mobius, he would trust the blond with his life, but for some reason, he was still too insecure about his scars, showing them to Mobius would mean he had to acknowledge how bad he had been doing mentally, that maybe talking and meeting with Mobius after a bad fight, having the other boy hold him when he cried and comfort him whenever he had a bad day at school wasn’t enough and wouldn’t be enough in the long run, that maybe, one person couldn’t magically fix all of his problems.
But he had learned that the hard way, hadn’t he? Although the bullying had gotten significantly less, it had also gotten significantly worse. It was like Thor’s clique were making up for the lost opportunities in one go.

A week after Thor had confronted him about his fight with their dad, Volstagg and Hogun had beaten him up in the boy’s toilets on the third floor, no one ever looked there and by the end of it, Loki had been limping, had definitely broken a rib and had blood all over one of his favourite shirts, he had worn a white one that day too. He hadn’t been to school the following days and Mobius had skipped school after the first day, insisting that if Loki wasn’t there, it didn’t make much sense for him to be attending either.
Loki didn’t know what Mobius would do after the summer break. But, when Mobius had actually stayed with Loki and had looked after his wounds, which he had excused as falling down the stairs, even though he wasn’t sure Mobius believed him. When the other boy was bringing him cool packs and corn cushions, something had sparked under Loki’s skin, it felt like a soft humming, he wasn’t sure where it came from, but the raven had decided that he didn’t mind and didn’t think about it further either. 

Now, Loki was almost done, a pair of black jorts thrown on together with some boots, he decided to just wait in his room. Odin and he had had a lot of fights in the last few weeks, a lot of the time started by Loki simply not putting up with Odin’s stupid ideas, he had started talking back more and more, which had gotten him a lot more bruises, and in return, a lot more car rides with Mobius. 

When the doorbell finally rang, Loki hurried down the stairs, just in time to get to the door before anyone else could, opening it and slipping out without saying goodbye to anyone, his mother wasn’t home anyways.
‘Hey, Mobius.’
He said, smiling wide at the boy standing in front of him, as almost always, he was wearing a beige, short sleeved shirt with khaki shorts, only missing his bright blue vest, that he had left at home in favour of him not dying because of the heat.
‘Hey, how are you?’
Mobius gave Loki a gentle smile, cocking his head to the side. Loki knew that it was a serious question, not the kind of how are you where I’m good was expected in return. But today, he was feeling good, so he just nodded back at Mobius.
‘I’m feeling good, excited to finally meet the others.’

He grinned and the two of them headed for the car, driving towards the park they had decided to meet up for a picnic. The sun was shining bright today, making both Loki and Mobius glad that the others had chosen a spot under a big tree, away in the shadows. Loki greeted the others, a lot quieter than when he was around Mobius, the blond noted.
‘Hi guys, I’m Loki, Mobius has told me all about you!’
He smiled politely and held his arms behind his back, fiddling with his fingers nervously.
‘Oh, so great to meet you, Mobius has not shut up about you ever since we met him.’
The blond girl said enthusiastically, earning herself a stern look from the boy still standing next to Loki.

‘I’m Sylvie, by the way. That’s Hunter’, she pointed to a girl with a bright yellow jumpsuit, she smiled at Loki happily,’ and this is OB and that’s Casey.’
She finished, pointing over at the two other boys who were still setting up the foods.
‘Heya Loki, really great to finally meet you. Are you warm, do you want some water?’
One of the boys, presumably OB started rambling, holding a cup with water out to the raven. Loki thankfully took it, he was getting a bit warm at this point. Mobius motioned for Loki to sit down and he did so, still scooting over as close as he could to Mobius without making it look weird in front of the others. He still felt quite nervous, he didn’t know how to act around them, it was like meeting Mobius for the first time, he was afraid of what to say, how the others would react and what they would think of him.

These people had been at school longer, they had a hundred percent heard of Loki being bullied, usually, people would just join in, he hoped they hadn’t told Mobius anything, but then again, Mobius hadn’t said anything to him about that topic. 

The others started off with some light conversation, sharing the food everyone had bought and handing each other plates and boxes. Loki had bought some food himself, having dug out the old family recipes, he had made cinnamon rolls.
The recipe was a bit different from most of the ones you would get in America, because it was his great grandma's recipe, who had still lived back in Norway, before his grandad had come to the US when Odin was born. Loki was glad to hear that the others liked his baking, Casey was the first to point it out.

‘Oh, Loki, what did you put in these, they taste really good!’
Loki smiled, hurriedly answering the other boy.
‘I put some cardamom in the pastry, you should try it too, it’s really great!’
Casey nodded and continued eating.

Whilst they held conversations, Loki got to know the others better, they all seemed really nice and friendly, he could understand why Mobius had become friends with them so fast. After a few hours, Loki found himself talking to OB about books, as it turned out, the other was an avid reader, as well as writer, having written some short stories, as well as novels, even though he was only sixteen!

Mobius was still sitting beside him, but was currently engaged in a conversation with Hunter, the two of them excitedly talking about their future plans. Suddenly, Mobius’s phone rang, and the other got up, excusing himself, telling the others that his dad was calling.
Suddenly, with the weight of Mobius’s back against his gone, Loki realized how out of place he felt. Without Mobius, he didn’t even have a link to these people, they probably wouldn’t have ever talked to him. But to his surprise, OB just kept talking to Loki, No stopping, and Loki thought about what it would be like, if these people would be his friends, without having some requirements from him, it made him smile.

When Mobius came back, Loki asked him if everything was alright, but Mobius just smiled, saying that his dad wouldn’t be back for dinner and just wanted to let Mobius know. He was meeting up with some friends and Mobius was more than happy that his dad had found some new friends too. His dad might have been worried about what Mobius would do in a new place, a new school and with new people, but that didn’t mean that Mobius didn’t feel just as worried for his dad as well. 

Loki nodded and Mobius had sat back down, the two of them starting to talk a bit more, at some point, Mobius started leaning on Loki’s side, eventually laying his head on Loki’s shoulder. Loki looked down at Mobius, momentarily stopping mid sentence, his face heating up slightly. Seconds after he started talking again, he noticed how Sylvie had not so secretly glanced over at the two of them, Mobius didn’t seem to notice.
A second later, she continued talking to Casey, who she had been talking to a second earlier. 

Half an hour later, they had seemingly run out of water. Luckily, there was a supermarket close to the park. Sylvie had volunteered to get more, as she stood up, she looked at Loki.
‘Do you want to come, Loki? I could use some help with carrying.’
She said and the raven nodded, getting up and  Mobius groaning slightly when the support underneath his head was gone. Loki laughed at that, Mobius flipping him off whilst grinning simultaneously. 

Loki breathed out relieved when the two of them entered the supermarket, the air conditioning feeling refreshing on his skin. Sylvie and him picked out some refreshments, Loki choosing a lime soda especially for Mobius, knowing how much the other liked that flavour. Sylvie gave him a look that he couldn’t place. ‘What?’ He gave her a confused look.
‘Be honest with me, do you like Mobius?’
Loki felt like he didn’t hear properly, surely, she was just talking nonsense.
‘No, of course not, as a friend only.’

He insisted and Sylvie gave him a curt nod before the two of them headed for the register.
Loki didn’t feel like Sylvie believed him. But it was true! Loki didn’t like Mobius more than friends, of course, the two of them were very close, but that was normal, should be normal for two boys to share hugs and so on, didn’t have to mean they were gay or anything.

But when he and Sylvie were back at the picnic blanket and Mobius was grinning brightly up at Loki when the raven showed him the lime soda he had especially bought for Mobius, Loki’s skin tickled and his heart rate quickened, he felt his breath hitch when he realized how he was reacting to Mobius, it couldn’t be real.
But in that moment he realized that none of it, a measly few days of their friendship had been platonic for Loki. That the second he had realized he could trust Mobius, the second the blond had comforted him, even though they hadn’t known each other for long, nothing had been platonic for Loki anymore, and the raven had fallen head over heels for the boy he wanted so badly to be his friend.

It made him feel happy and miserable at the same time. For one, he couldn’t ignore the butterflies in his stomach when he looked over at Mobius anymore, he guessed they had always been there, he just hadn’t been able to point where it was coming from or what it meant.
But on the other side, he felt like he had tainted their friendship, like he couldn’t even keep their friendship as that. Loki’s feelings had obstructed the view of their relationship. It wasn’t fair to Mobius, it wasn’t fair of him to be hoping for something more, to be pining after a boy, who had so obviously not wanted to be looked at as a gay boy.

Right then and there, Mobius’s smile tainting Loki’s face red, he decided that he couldn’t do this to Mobius. He needed to get rid of his feelings somehow, stop pining after someone so unattainable. Mobius had shown him again and again how much he would do for Loki, and Loki couldn’t push his feelings on the other. 

The rest of the picnic, Loki stayed quieter, lost in thoughts about what to do.
When they packed up, he barely spoke a word, only saying goodbye to the others after exchanging numbers,  promising to text sometime. Mobius gave Loki a ride home, offering to stay over at Loki’s place. Loki declined, he didn’t think he could stand Mobius being anywhere near him within the next few hours, he did offer to call the blond in the evening though, not wanting to seem like he was avoiding the other.
Mobius just nodded and smiled, and told Loki that he could always call him if he needed to.

Loki went up to his room as fast as he could when he arrived, throwing himself onto his bed, his breath suddenly coming out more ragged, and before he knew it, tears were streaming down his face, ugly, loud sobs coming from his mouth, which he tried to muffle into his pillow. He didn’t know what to do, he felt useless. Not like he could ask Mobius for advice, he hated this, he wished he never liked boy’s, it wouldn’t have messed up the only real friendship he had in years, he couldn't ever possibly let Mobius know, he would just have to get over it by himself, nothing that he hadn’t done before.

Chapter Text

Mobius didn't immediately notice Loki's change in behaviour, but after a few days it became apparent. Loki was quieter, he accompanied Mobius to lunch, sitting with him and the others. He sometimes talked to them, gave short answers to questions, but rarely contributed to the conversation. Mobius had assumed Loki was just a bit tired, but he soon realised how weird it was for Loki to be that quiet. He usually talked so much, sure, he seemed to be a bit shy around people he hadn't known for long, but even at the picnic he had said more.

Mobius and Loki were walking to the cafeteria together, they had just finished another English class together and were talking about an oral exam that was coming up. Mobius noticed, how even in private, in just a conversation with the two of them Loki seemed to talk less than usual. Before the two of them could enter the cafeteria, Mobius pulled Loki aside into a bathroom, it was on the third floor anyways, no one ever came here. He turned to Loki, who looked both confused and alarmed. Mobius didn’t know why Loki looked so alarmed, he knew that the raven trusted him as much as he trusted the other boy.

The blond however didn’t know, that the bathroom he had pulled Loki into was the one where most of the bullying took place, especially in the past few weeks, where they couldn’t pick on Loki as much in the halls anymore, since Thor had decided to secretly watch over his younger brother, often times sitting awfully close to the raven, even dragging Jane with him, who more than often looked more bored than anything else.

‘Hey, Loki, are you okay? You’ve been kind of quiet ever since the weekend, I mean, I thought you got along with the others just fine, but if you’re actually uncomfortable with them or something please tell me, I’m kind of worrying I misread the situation and now I’m forcing you to hang out with people you really don’t like and if it is, I really, really didn’t mean to.’

Mobius was out of breath by the time he finished talking, having started rambling like he often did. Loki suddenly patted his shoulder, smiling at him gently, the raven’s smile tugging at something underneath Mobius’s skin.
‘It’s fine, Mobius, I really like the others and I’m glad you introduced me to them. I’ve just been dealing with something, but I’m fine, believe me.’
Loki said and Mobius’s reaction didn’t look entirely impressive, Loki even thought it looked a bit hurt.

‘You know, you can always talk to me, Loki, seriously, whatever it is, I won’t judge you for anything.’
The blond tried to sound confident, he wasn’t. He didn’t know what it was, but something about Loki not telling him what he was dealing with was bothering him.
‘I know, but this is something I need to deal with alone, trust me, it’s better that way.’

Loki answered him, not meeting the blond boy’s eyes. Mobius obviously didn’t expect Loki to always tell him about everything, but within the past few weeks the other boy had told him so much, confided in him and trusted him with his secrets. Not everything, Loki left things out, Mobius knew but never pushed, coming to the conclusion that Loki should decide when to tell him stuff. But the other telling him explicitly that he was better off not telling Mobius still stung.

‘That’s fine, just know I’m always there for you, you can call me anytime, I mean it.’
He said and reached for Loki’s hand on his shoulder, laying his own hand on top of the other boy’s. Loki pulled in a sharp breath, almost impossible to hear for the other boy, but very evident for him. He felt Mobius’s warm hand on his and all of the blood in his body immediately traveling to his heart and face.

He slowly pulls back his hand, not wanting the other boy to notice how red his face became, so he lowered his face, looking at the tiled floor and his shoes, which are almost touching the other boy’s, making him realise how close the two of them are actually standing in front of each other.
‘I know, I will.’
It’s not a long answer, but an important one. Mobius smiles at Loki and nods, letting his hand fall to his side again too.

‘So, want to finally go and have lunch now? Break is almost over.’
Mobius asked and Loki nodded. The two of them finally went to the cafeteria, sitting down with the others. Loki was still quiet and didn’t talk as much as usual, but he seemed less tense and a bit happier, which relieved Mobius. He hoped that his words could help Loki, he wouldn’t be mad at the other boy if he were to wake him up at three in the morning.

When the break, which, after their talk was only around ten more minutes, was over, Loki and Mobius parted ways, having classes they didn’t share afterwards. Loki headed towards his classroom, sighing when he remembered that it was on the third floor, which meant he would have to walk up all of those stairs. 

When he arrived at the top, he immediately headed for his classroom. He was already a bit late and the halls were practically empty, not a lot of classes were held on this floor, because it was slightly smaller than the other floors and also had quite a lot less rooms. Suddenly, Loki heard voices coming his way, he looked at the floor, trying to avoid eye contact with whoever was approaching him. When he was walking with Mobius, he always felt better. People still stared, they still whispered, but never said anything out loud. But now? Whenever he was alone, people seemed to interpret that as their go signal to start saying the worst things out loud directly to his face. 

As soon as the people were within his immediate hearing distance and he could make out their voices clearer, he froze. He looked up, only to be greeted by Fandral and Hogun, who had seemed to notice him at the exact same moment. 

Everything happened too fast, Loki didn’t even have time to process what was happening, before he was lying on the tiled floor of the bathroom he had had his conversation with Mobius earlier, the boys grinning down at him.
‘Hello, dear Loki, I feel like we haven’t had enough time together recently.’

Fandral said, the smirk on his face still evident. ‘I’ve been fine without you, thanks.’ Loki hissed through gritted teeth. He tried to sound braver, but his voice was failing him, quivering when he spoke.
‘I don’t know, we certainly haven’t.’ Hogun grinned.
‘We saw you, you know, hanging out with that Mobius guy, he’s new on the football team too, you know, such a pity you make everything worse for the people around you.’

He shook his head, ticking with his tongue whilst the other boy gave him nothing but a grin. Loki’s blood ran cold. They couldn’t do something to Mobius, he would never forgive himself if Mobius ended up like him, no friends, bullied and alone. All because Loki decided to be selfish and befriended the other boy, even though he knew what it could bring with it for Mobius.
‘Leave him out of this, he hasn't done anything to you.’

Loki’s jaw hurt from how hard he was clenching down, for one, to manage the anger that was making his blood boil, and secondly, because it made him look less scared, less emotionally attached to the other, but that didn’t seem to convince Hogun and Fandral. ‘Struck a nerve, ay?’ The black haired boy asked, making Loki feel even more afraid.

‘You know what, we don’t want you contaminating him with your gay disease, he’s not that bad of a player, it’d be a shame if he hung out more with you and that for some reason got him kicked off of the team or something.’

Loki knew they’d won, they knew it too. He held his head low, trying to stop the tears from streaming down his face. Why did they have to be like this towards him? He had never done anything to personally offend them, or at least never anything personal. He felt hopeless, to say the least. Normally, he would have thought about their threat, weighing out the pro’s and con’s, but with this, he knew he would do anything to keep Mobius safe, keep him in the situation he was in right now.

He didn’t know what he’d do if he was the reason Mobius would be treated differently than he was at the moment. If Loki lost his friends, that was nothing new. He’d lived through it once, only barely, but he did, he would manage a second time. When the two boys left the bathroom a quarter of an hour later, the satisfaction was written on their faces.
Loki however was still lying on the tiled floor, blood dripping from his nose and lip, his ribs aching horrifyingly and his knee throbbing against the inside of his trousers. His breath came in ragged breaths as he tried to pull himself up against the sink, so he could at least wash off the blood.

When he finally managed to hoist himself up, having to put his whole body weight onto one of his legs because the other was hurting so bad he didn’t want to know what would happen if he strained it any more, he flinched a little at his reflection. Sure, he had seen himself in bad situations, after a particularly bad relapse, a fight, the worst days during winter, but this was a whole nother level. His eyes were bloodshot, numb tears still rolling down his face and making a dripping sound on the sink.

His nose was still bleeding, blood running down to his mouth and the blood from his split lip also running down his chin, making him taste the metal tang inside of his mouth. He looked more than shaken up, somehow he had gained some pretty impressive eyebags within fifteen minutes and they made him look even more tired than he already was. He thought back to what the two of them had said as he tried to wash his face somewhat decently, being difficult with him still crying, bleeding and shaking.

His body hurting just about everywhere, his head felt a bit woozy from where it had hit the floor multiple times. But he knew what they said was true, if he hung around Mobius more, people would inevitably start picking on them too, that’s how it started back when he was first being bullied too.
At first, his friends stuck to his side, defending him, but at some point they decided that it wasn’t worth it for them to go through all of that trouble of defending him, when they could be better off by themselves.
Realistically, he knew that Mobius wouldn’t leave him, he trusted the blond boy, but some voice in his head told him that it was better to leave Mobius alone, so the other boy wouldn’t leave him in the end, it was better for both of them. Suddenly he heard the door trying to open, flinging all of those thoughts out of his head, replacing them with panic.

Luckily, it seemed to be a bit jammed, so Loki had enough time to pull himself into one of the stalls before the person entered the bathroom. He tried to keep quiet as he heard the other person walk over to the sinks, clasping a hand on top of his mouth to silence his breathing, that was still coming in ragged breaths.

‘Holy shit, what the fuck?’
He suddenly heard, and he knew that voice all too well, he would recognize his brother's voice anywhere.

Thor had only gone to wash his hands, after he had gotten some mild chemicals onto his hands during an experiment. What he didn’t think was that he would be greeted with a puddle of blood on the floor. There were drops of blood mixed with water leading from the sink to one of the stalls.
He walked over to the stall, just to see that it was unlocked, maybe the person had left earlier? But then he heard a tiny breath, uneven and slow. He knocked on the door once.

‘Hey man, you okay, do you need a doctor or something?’
The person didn’t answer, but he could still hear their breaths coming from inside of the stall.
‘Look, can I open the door? Seriously, this amount of blood doesn’t look healthy.’

Loki internally cursed himself for not locking the door, for being so foolish as to let Thor see him like this, but for some reason, he didn’t feel fear, he felt relief. The blond opened the door, and the sight in front of him made his heart simultaneously stop and shatter into a thousand small pieces. His brother was leaning on the toilet, his arms holding him up.

The blood was still slowly running down his face, which was very obviously in pain, he didn’t look Thor in the eyes, but when he spoke, the quiver was unmistakable.

‘Hey, Thor.’
All the raven got out before he burst into tears, sobs wracking through his body as his chest heaved for air. Thor hurried over to his brother, he was horrified at what his brother looked like, none of this was self inflicted like he already guessed his brother did, this was done by someone else. He didn’t know what to do, so he held Loki in his arms, crouching down with his brother to hold him whilst he calmed down a bit.

‘Loki, loki look at me, where are you hurt?’
The blond could tell his brother was trying to answer him, but his breathing was wobbly, his breaths sharp and his eyes were still glossing over with tears. Thor held his brother for what felt like an eternity, rubbing circles across his back like his mother had done whenever he had fallen down and hurt himself as a child.

It took several minutes, but after some time, Loki’s breathing seemed to calm down again, his breathing pattern returning to normal. Thor quickly stood up and got a wet paper towel, handing it to Loki, who dabbed it at his face, holding it over his split lip and nose, which was by the looks of it starting to bruise pretty badly.

‘Don’t tell mom about this.’
Was the first thing that left Loki’s mouth. Thor didn’t know what to say to that.

‘What do you mean, not tell her? Loki what happened, you have to at least tell me, what am I supposed to think when I find you like this, at school?!’

The raven didn’t know what he should say, he couldn’t tell Thor what happened, how would he? That his best friends had been doing this to him for years without him ever noticing?

‘Loki, I’m being serious, is that what that argument was about with you and dad a few weeks ago? That you’re being bullied at school? Please, I need you to be honest with me.’

Thor was practically pleading with his brother at this point. Too bad Loki had always been a good liar.
‘It’s nothing like that, I had a disagreement with someone, it just turned a bit physical.’

But Loki knew that Thor believed not a single word of what he had just said.

Chapter Text

After Loki had finished his sentence, he had left as fast as possible, leaving Thor alone, thinking about who could have done such a thing to his brother? But he soon came to realise that he knew so little about Loki, that he couldn’t even think of someone.
Maybe Mobius? He was the closest person to Loki from what Thor could tell, maybe even a bit more than just friends. But he didn’t think Mobius even had it in him. He was a good footballer, but even if he just accidentally ran into someone he would apologize, no matter what team they were on. Thor shook his head, no, Mobius would never do such a thing.

But maybe he could ask the other blond boy for advice. If he, as Loki's brother, knew so little about him, then maybe his best friend knew something. There was only one problem, he didn’t know where he could find Mobius, so he went back to his class.
When the bell rang, he packed his bag as quickly as possible and practically ran down the stairs towards the car park. He had seen Mobius’s car multiple times, often when he and Loki hung out at their place and Mobius had parked out front.

He waited by the other boy’s car and soon saw Mobius heading in his direction. He looked more than puzzled when he saw Thor himself standing by his car, seemingly waiting for him.
‘If you’re looking for Loki, he isn’t going with me today, said he had to study for a test.’ Mobius said.
Thor shook his head.
‘I’m not looking for my brother, but this is about him. Can we maybe sit in the car, I don’t want to be babbling this across the whole parking lot.’

Mobius nodded and unlocked his car, the two of them getting in.
‘So, what is it about Loki? If it’s something too personal I won’t answer, you should go ask him yourself.’
Mobius said, his voice laced with just a slight tinge of protectiveness.

‘It’s somewhat serious, actually. I don’t want you to freak out, but Loki was beaten up earlier, pretty badly. I accidentally found him, but he kind of ran away before I could properly talk to him about it.’
Thor said and Mobius’s heart had seemed to have fallen into his stomach.

Loki had been hurt?

Why hadn’t he told him anything, was that why he didn’t want to drive home with Mobius that day? Mobius had too many questions, and too little answers, so he just stared at Thor, who was fiddling with his fingers, obviously anxious about this.
‘Please be honest, Thor, how bad was he, shit was he very hurt, how is he now, I should probably drive right over.’
The shorter boy started rambling, Thor noticed how worried he immediately seemed for his brother, it made him a weird kind of happy, it meant that after years of Loki being just a lone wolf, he had found a friend who actually liked him and cared for him, he just hoped Mobius wouldn’t hurt Loki.

‘He was pretty bad, a lot of blood, might have broken his nose, but I’m not sure, he didn’t really give me time to see if he was hurt anywhere else.’
Mobius sharply pulled in the air through his teeth, running a hand across his face and through his hair, trying to grasp at what was going on and why this had had to happen to Loki specifically, it wasn’t fair.

‘But, Mobius I needed to talk to you about this, I think at this point you know more about my brother than I do. Do you have any idea who could be behind this? I don’t think I can sleep properly, knowing that there’s someone in this school who is doing things that are brutal to people.’

The other boy thought about it for a moment, there weren’t many instances where he had noticed people actively picking on Loki, at least not when he was walking around with his friend. But then that one time in the hallway came into his mind, the boy with the back, long hair, shoving Loki against the locker, the bystanding people laughing. Loki had shaken it off as a joke at the time, but now with the information that he didn’t have, it put everything into a whole new light.

’I think there might be one person, I don’t know their name, a guy, long black hair, asian.’
Thor’s breath hitched, Mobius had just directly described his friend, Hogun. He was usually on the football team, but hadn’t been able to play the past few weeks because he had gotten a new shift at his part time job, so Mobius hadn't met him yet. But why would one of his best friends do something like that to his brother? They all knew he was, so there didn’t seem to be a reason in Thor’s eyes.

‘Do you know who I’m talking about? I’ve only seen him once before, so Imight not have gotten all of the details correct.’ Mobius started to justify, but Thor just smiled weakly, he would have to definitely keep an eye on his friends, even though he couldn’t believe they would do such a thing either.   
‘Okay, I, I’m going to go check on him, he’s probably home, yeah, that sounds good.’ Mobius was more talking to himself than to Thor, who was nodding along with the other boy’s words.
‘That sounds good, I think he could use some comfort more coming from you than from me.’ Thor said and left Mobius’s car, heading towards his own one quickly. 

By the time Mobius pulled up to Loki’s house, he barely remembered the car drive, his mind fogging over with thoughts that didn’t seem to quiet down no matter what he did. He rang the doorbell and waited patiently, but no one answered. He guessed as much, Mobius hadn’t told Loki he was coming over and everyone else had a key to the house. Luckily, he knew where the spare key was, tucked away underneath a small planted tree amongst some other plants out front.

He entered the house and made his way to his friends room, to his surprise, Loki’s door wasn’t locked, but he still knocked on it quietly, opening it just a centimeter and speaking loud enough so he hoped that Loki could hear him.
‘Loki can I come in? Thor told me what happened, please I just want to make sure you’re better.’ The blond waited for a response, and a few seconds later he got a quiet one.

‘You can come in.’ Loki’s voice was hoarse, quivering, he wasn’t doing good.
Mobius opened the door completely and walked over to Loki, who was lying on his bed, tears falling down his face. His nose was badly bruised and without hesitating, Mobius took Loki into his arms and let him cry into his shoulder, the blond could feel himself tear up too. Mobius sat down next to the raven, who was still half way lying on his bed, but now clinging to his friend.

‘It’s going to be fine, Lokes, I promise, I’ll do everything to help you.’
The nickname is unintentional, Mobius quickly reads Loki’s expression, which has at this point calmed down a bit, and guesses that he doesn't mind. Loki however could feel his heartbeat quicken, his face felt warmer and it reminds him pathetically of how he likes the person who is probably the closest to him at this point, about how he likes Mobius in a romantic way and about how Mobius doesn’t like him back.

He could already feel the guilt settling in, but he decided to ignore it for the sake of the moment. Mobius took his head off of the other boy’s shoulder and looked at him, no hint of humor on his face.
‘Look, I know this is probably not something you want to tell me, but I don’t want to see you in pain like this anymore.I don’t know how I can help you, but I want to try, really.’
Loki nodded, he felt a lump growing in his throat and his eyes stung with unshed tears.
‘Who’s been doing this to you? I just want to know if it’s someone I know or’, the blond cut himself off, he let his head drop and rested himself on the other boy. A few weeks ago, when he had asked the others if they knew anything about Loki was being treated and by whom, they had said Thor’s clique, but he couldn’t remember if they had given him names and he was pretty sure that if they did, he hadn’t remembered them.

‘It’s, ‘ Loki pulled in a sharp breath. ‘It’s Thor’s friends, they’ve been doing it for years, I don’t know why, it just kind of started and it got worse and’ Loki’s voice wouldn’t let him talk anymore, it was hoarse, his throat hurt and he felt like the words were being choked out of him. ‘Okay, okay, thank you, I- we’ll figure out a way to help you, get you out of this situation, trust me.’

Loki nodded and Mobius and he lay down together, Mobius continuing to comfort his friend.
At some point Thor came back, he had a little scab on his chin and a small bruise on his cheek, but seemed fine otherwise. Mobius said goodbye to Loki, he knew the brothers needed some time to talk alone, but he promised to call Loki later in the evening. The brother’s had a long conversation about how Loki had been treated by Thor’s (now former) friends and there was a lot of apologizing, but when Loki started apologizing for making his brother lose his friends, he was quickly shut up by the older boy, who said he was being ridiculous and none of it was his fault and that he had enough friends so Loki shouldn’t be worried about him.

Later that night, Mobius called Loki as promised and the two of them called until Loki could hear quiet snores from the other side of the line and fell asleep to the sound of the other boy’s breath, the sound following him into his dreams. 

The following weeks were almost like a fever dream, but a good one, they passed quickly. People said that time passed quicker when you were having fun, and Loki could successfully say that he was. 

Thor had gone to their head office the next day after finding out about his brother being bullied and got all three of them suspended for a week and taken off of the football team. His status as football captain definitely helped with that.
Loki felt happier than he had in ages, he could walk around school without a worry in the world and a nice group of friends to hang out with in their breaks and free time too. One time they had set up a big screen in Hunter’s backyard and had spent the entire night watching horror movies until the sun rose the next day.

Some time during the night, Loki had fallen asleep and Mobius had somehow caught him and had held him for several hours until he woke up. Loki hadn't talked to Mobius for a day afterwards. Not because he was mad at the blond for what he did, but he needed some space to get his feelings in check.

He built up a routine of doing so, for him, this was the only way he could keep being friends with Mobius. He tried to get over his little infatuation, he was sure it was just because the other boy was so nice to him, because the two of them were such close friends. But after a short while, he realised that every time something like this did or did not happen, that everytime he met up with Mobius, was on a call together with him, he just fell harder for him.

He wouldn’t call it love, that was dangerous, he was fine with calling it a crush for now. Even after the weekly suspension of the three, they didn’t start immediately bullying him again like he had suspected, instead, they kept their distance, avoided him in the halls and didn’t even call out his name anymore.
Mobius was always with him too. He had told Loki how much he wanted to help him out of this situation, and so he started walking around with him together in the halls, always, no matter if the class he had had prior was on the other side of the building.

Mobius would practically sprint to wherever Loki was and they would go to the break together. Some may think this was belittling Loki, making him look like he couldn’t even walk the way from his classroom to the cafeteria alone, but it made Loki feel special, it made him realise just how much he was cared for and it made him happy.
They had spent a lot of time with the others too, becoming a pretty tight knitted friend group. Somewhere along the way, Hunter had introduced them to Ravonna. She was the school's head girl and they all came to like her a lot.

She had obviously heard about Loki’s situation, being on the student council along with Thor, but to Loki’s relief, had never brought it up. It gave him hope that maybe at some point people wouldn’t look at him and only remember how he was bullied for so long. She had soon hung out with them a lot more and no one was complaining.

Even though she seemed to be kind of strict and controlling at first, she was actually a very nice person and quickly warmed up to the group. One day they all met up to go to the beach again, Loki had been so anxious about going swimming with them he had felt like he was going to throw up minutes before Mobius had come to pick him up. Loki had told his best friend about his scars on a call the night beforehand and Mobius had assured him that no one would judge him for it.

Loki had still felt like shit. But when they arrived at the beach and Loki and the others went into the water, no one seemed to even look twice at his arms, no one asked about them or made remarks and he finally felt like he had control over his life. Control over what he was doing and how he was feeling, without having to harm himself.

He still argued with his dad, still had fights so bad Mobius would pick up a crying Loki and the two of them would go for long car drives before sometimes, Loki would sleep over at Mobius’s place. But nothing was completely flawless, Loki was happy with how it was at this moment and he wished it would never change.

Chapter Text

The knock on Thor’s door was quiet. The blond looked at his alarm clock which read just after eight in the evening.
‘Yeah? Come in.’
The door opened slowly and in came his younger brother, he looked uncertain, his eyebrows furrowed. Thor sat up from his bed, where he had been watching a show.

‘Hey, Loki, what is it?’ He asked and Loki came in, closing the door behind him and fiddling with his fingers, not making eye contact with the older boy.
‘Yeah, uhm, so, I wanted to ask for help, professional help.’
Loki stopped talking, he seemed to still, but Thor motioned him to continue talking. Loki had thought about this for a long time, he still had his plan for the beginning of the summer holidays, but the past few weeks had been so blissful for him, he didn’t know what he wanted anymore, he knew that if he didn’t do anything about it, he would still follow through with it, but the thought of blond hair, waves at the beach and the skyscraper view from a particular room had made him hesitate more than once.

He decided he wanted to at least give recovery a try, maybe it could do something for him.
‘I want to ask mom if she would allow me to. I wanted to ask you if you could help me, I’m truthfully not sure if I can do it on my own.’ Thor nodded.
‘Of course, Loki, I’ll always help you, what exactly do you want me to do?’
Loki stilled, in truth, he had not completely thought his plan through, he knew he wanted to ask his parents for help, preferably his mother first, as she would surely be kinder about the whole situation.

‘I think maybe you could just be there with me, I’m not completely sure what I want to say yet. I think I just need some support with this.’
Loki finally mustered up the courage to look up at his brother, who was smiling and nodding at him. At once, a heavy weight dropped off of his shoulders, he knew he could count on Thor with this, it made him feel a lot braver than he had a few minutes ago.
‘When do you want to talk to mother, or father?’
Loki knew he wanted it done as fast as possible, their father had left earlier, going off to some business meeting and probably going to a bar afterwards, he often didn’t come home until late in the night, he also often came home in a bad mood.

But Loki was the only one who ever got wind of that. He still vividly remembered the first time it had happened. He was sleeping soundly, when his door had burst open and in had stomped an angry Odin, his face seemed to be practically boiling over with how red it looked. Loki had been almost too tired to realize what was going on, when he had felt the first fist collide with the side of his face. He had been too shocked to say anything, he had cried and cried and begged his dad to stop.

He did eventually, but only after his at the time only fourteen year old son was battered and bruised. Loki hadn’t understood what he had done wrong, what he had done to deserve such a treatment from the person he called his father.
Of course, they had more arguments than Odin had with his older brother.
Loki knew he wasn’t the favorite son, but up until that point, he had always believed that no matter how much Odin favored Thor, no matter how much he disliked Loki, he wouldn’t actually physically hurt him, would he?

But that night, even his last faith in his father had died, together with a piece of himself.
The following week had been the first time he had ever deliberately hurt himself.
From that day on, Odin had often come to Loki after drinking, hurting him via hitting him. The little flicker of hope that Loki had left was only that Odin had never hurt him whilst sober, maybe it was just him being angry whilst under the influence.

Maybe Odin couldn’t recognize Loki when he was drunk, even through Loki’s sobs of. Please, stop father, no don’t hit me, I’m your son, am I not? And many other variations of him begging the man to stop hurting him, stop abusing him so he wouldn’t have to wake up in pain, wake up and wish he hadn’t ever woken up at all.

He had already been bullied at this time, but he was always sure that he was strong enough in his mind, that it wouldn’t do anything to him psychologically. Odin’s actions had proved him wrong very fast. It wasn’t the physical hurt, it was the fact that the person in the house Odin disliked the most, would hurt without thinking about it twice, was him.

It made him cry more times than he would ever admit and he beat himself up enough for that fact alone.
Loki just hoped that Frigga could persuade his father later to let Loki visit a therapist. He knew that Odin’s view was that people who went to see one were total sissys , who didn’t have the proper strength to be a man, he said they were a disgrace, they were pathetic and weak and miserable.

Luckily for Loki, he believed he was all of those, so it hadn't been that hard to decide whether he wanted to or not. He hoped Odin wouldn’t be too mad at Loki, maybe he could say something nice to his son for once, but the raven doubted that. He at least still had hope, that is his mother explained it to Odin, the man would see that it wasn't actually too bad of a thing and could basically help everyone further in life. But, he didn't want to raise his hopes too high, so he just sighed.

‘I would kind of like to do that today, if you would be okay with that and maybe have some time to come with me now. I think father is not home, but I would like to tell mother first anyways.’
Thor nodded, approvingly.
‘But of course, Loki, seriously, anything for you. I am meeting up with Jane at around nine, but there is still enough time for that now.’ He said and stood up, Loki turned around to open the door, he could already feel his stomach twist and turn with what, fear? He wasn’t afraid of his mothers reaction, but he was a bit scared of starting the conversation, laying bare his problems in front of her and being honest about how he had been feeling. Thor laid his hand on Loki’s shoulder before the younger one could exit his room.
‘Loki, I know you can do it, it might be scary, but I’m there for you and I’m sure 

 mother will be too.’ Loki noticed how his brother had left out their father,but it only made sense. For at this point, even Thor had had to notice how his younger brother was treated by their father, the amount of arguments could not be overheard. Frigga was currently standing in the kitchen, she had a bowl in hand and was whisking what seemed to be pastry for another batch of cinnamon rolls. Loki knew that she still connected heavily to their heritage and he was all for it.
He found it fascinating and they even often visited Norway in the holidays, they were planning on going there for one week in the summer holidays too, if this worked, maybe Loki would be able to visit the beautiful country another time. 

‘Oh, hello you two, do you want to help me bake?’ Loki shook his head slightly, almost invisible to the eye, but his mother noticed anyway.
‘What is it then? If you're still hungry we still have some leftovers in the fridge.’
Loki was glad Thor was there, his presence was grounding and without him there he probably would have chickened out by now. ‘I need to talk to you about something mom, something serious.’
Frigga immediately noticed Loki’s tone and turned around to the two, setting down the bowl and walking over to her younger son. ‘What is it dear? You know you can always come to me with anything.’ Loki nodded, he could already feel the knot forming in his throat, but he pushed his voice past it.

‘I- I’ve not been doing so well, I wasn’t treated very nicely in school by some people, I want to see a therapist.’ He blurted it all out at once, like ripping off a bandaid.
He looked back up at his mother, who was smiling sympathetically before she went and hugged him.
‘Oh Loki, I’m so sorry I never noticed, of course you can if that is what you think can help you, I’m sure I can convince your father somehow.’ Loki felt a tear drop down his face and he nodded into her shoulder. Thor also comforted him in some way, laying his hand on his brother's shoulder. ‘It’s going to be okay, really.’
The raven nodded, he felt relieved at his mother’s reaction, maybe his father wouldn’t react that badly either. Loki returned upstairs, shortly followed by Thor, who gave him a hug, telling him how proud he was of Loki. 

Loki lay down in his room, it wasn’t too late yet, so he went and got a book from one of his many tightly packed shelves and started reading. At some point shortly past nine, he could hear shouts coming from downstairs, he knew what it was about, but he tried not to listen, he didn’t want to listen, a fight couldn’t be good. 

Frigga had known that Odin wouldn’t agree with her, more than once had she heard her husband's views on therapy, still she had hoped that if it came to their own son’s wellbeing, he would change those.
The fight was long, Frigga tried her best to tell Odin just how important this was, to both Loki and also her. But Odin wouldn’t listen and in the end, Frigga left the house for a short breather, going over to her friends.
She didn’t know if she could tell Loki that his father wouldn’t allow him to get treatment, not with how hopeful Loki had looked when he had asked her. 

The bathroom tiles were cold when Loki switched on the light, but they did nothing to him, his numbness shielding him from the sensation. His body hurt, he was bleeding from his lip again and he was sure his stomach would bruise badly. He didn’t know exactly what had happened. He was listening to music, drowning out the sound of his parents fighting, when suddenly Odin had burst into his room, angry and in rage.
He had insulted Loki, calling him all kinds of slurs, when Loki had asked what he had done wrong, Odin had belittled him for wanting to see a therapist, he had called his son weak, pathetic and good for nothing. The words had stung Loki in a way he couldn't explain himself, but the words would be the least of his problems.

This was how he ended up as he was, bruised and beaten. He didn’t remember what happened, but when the first cut seared through him, the numbness finally broke away from him, tears finally flowing freely over his face as more blood ran from his arms. He truly felt pathetic, he had been doing so well too, he was sure he could have gone longer without doing this to himself again, but maybe he was just not good enough, maybe he did deserve this.

When he ended up back in his room with bandages around his arms, the first thing he did was call Mobius. He wasn’t sure if the other boy was still up at this hour, but when he picked up after the second ring, Loki sighed happily.

‘Hey, Lokes, what’s up?’ Mobius asked. Technically, he had been almost asleep just a few minutes ago, he was sleeping a lot of the times Loki called him, but for the sake of his friend, he always pretended he had still been up. Most of the time something was bothering Loki and he didn’t want to put the burden that he woke Mobius up on that list too. He could hear Loki’s ragged voice and could immediately tell that it was worse than usual. This didn’t seem to be a usual fight with his father, this seemed more serious. ‘Could you come over please? I’ll tell you then.’

‘Of course, give me thirty minutes.’ Mobius didn’t think he’d ever gotten dressed this fast.
His dad was already used to Mobius just heading out in the middle of the night to go and see Loki, Mobius had sort of told him about Loki’s family issues, but only because his dad wouldn’t have let him go otherwise. When Mobius finally arrived at Loki’s house, the raven was already sitting on the porch, hood pulled over his head and phone in hand. When he heard the car arriving, he looked up, light returning to his eyes.

The blond practically jumped out of the car and hurried over to Loki, who flung his arms around Mobius and held him tight. Even though Loki was taller than him by a few inches, the position wasn’t uncomfortable, the raven laying his head onto Mobius’s shoulder and he took slow long breaths.
‘Hey, Loki it’s going to be fine, whatever it is, it’ll be completely okay and we’ll work it out, I’m going to help you.’ He said soothingly. Over time he had learned what to say and what not to. He wasn’t the greatest at expressing comfort when he first met Loki, but he had gotten a lot better at it and he still meant every single word he said.
‘Yeah, I know.’ Loki croaked out, huffing slightly and when he lifted his face, he could see his obviously reopened wound on his lip, red and angry and swollen.

‘God, Loki, what happened?’ Mobius asked quickly, he had an inkling of what had happened. He knew Odin was a violent man, he had never spoken to Loki about if his father had ever hurt him physically, but at this point, he didn’t think he even had to ask.

‘Please, can we drive somewhere?’ Loki asked and Mobius obviously agreed, he and Loki entered the car and Mobius started driving. All he cared about was that his friend was going to be fine, Loki just wanted to be as far away as possible from his whole home situation, maybe go to see the stars on that cliff he and Mobius had gone to so many times by now.
He didn’t really care, as long as Mobius was going to be by his side.

Chapter Text

The night air was cool on Loki’s skin as he held his hand out of the open window. The wind hitting him in the face and cooling down his skin. He felt better already, the music playing in just the right volume, whilst he and Mobius sang along to it.
After half an hour, they pulled up to a secluded area, the night sky showing all of the stars, due to the lack of housing anywhere near. The lonely bench at the top of the cliff showed many carvings and names scribbled on with permanent markers. Best friends as well as couples had evidently come here over the years, but judging by the state of the bench, no one had visited in what could easily be ten years. Loki sighed as he and Mobius exited the car, breathing in the clean night air.

Mobius layed one hand around his shoulder, securing his waist with the other as he led his friend towards the bench. The two of them sat down and Loki immediately leaned against the blond, who lay his arm around his shoulders comfortingly. ‘You want to talk about it Lokes?’ Mobius asked and Loki hesitated, his father’s physical abuse had been something he had kept secret from everyone, even Thor, who he had opened up about almost everything towards.

But maybe talking to Mobius about it would help him and maybe Mobius could even help him, he had shown just how much he could help Loki within the past few weeks alone.
‘Well, I mean, I- I’ve not been feeling the best you know, and I wanted to ask my mother if she would allow me to go and see a therapist.’
He pulled in a sharp breath, but Mobius gave him a reassuring nod and a smile.
‘She said she’d talk to my father about it, they had a fight. I mean, I knew it wouldn’t amount to anything, his view on therapy has always been..’

Mobius' brows furrowed, he was certain that he knew what Loki meant by his father’s view on therapy. Even in the few weeks he had been on the football team, the one time therapy had been mentioned, it had been because a girlfriend of one of the players had started going to therapy.
The response had immediately been overwhelmingly negative. A lot of them had said stuff like how pathetic or wow, that’s embarrassing. It seemed that especially here in Texas, a lot of people had a similar kind of view on things like gay people or in this case therapy.

He felt bad for Loki, to say the least. He had seen his friend suffer, and he had never needed therapy, but he knew that what the raven had gone through would make anyone need therapy.

‘He came to my room after the fight, he was mad. I’ve seen him mad before, but never this mad.’
Mobius could practically hear Loki tear up, the arm that had been lying at his side was slung around his friend's shoulder and with the other hand he wiped away the tears that were brimming at the raven’s eyes.

Mobius’s eyes landed back on Loki’s lips. He was still sure that it wasn’t something he would have done to himself, no matter how many scars his friend had on his arms, he deemed Loki too caring about his looks to do something to his face. He reflected on the things the raven had said within the past five minutes and it hit him, his stomach feeling uneasy from the revelation.

‘Loki, did your dad do this to you?’
Loki froze, he wanted to tell Mobius anyways, but for the other to say it out like that, so matter of factly, it made him all too aware of the situation. A sob racked through his body, making him shudder and lean into the other boy's touch.

‘Oh Loki.’
Was all Mobius could say before he could feel himself tear up at the confirmation of his suspicion.
‘Does anyone else know?’ He asked and Loki shook his head.
Mobius moved his hand up to Loki’s head and rubbed small circles whilst the other boy leaned closer to Mobius’s chest. They sat there for what seemed hours, it might have been hours.

The stars were bright, and even if it had been a horrific night, Loki couldn’t help but look at the beauty in the sky and for a glimpse of a second, he thought he saw Mobius’s reflection in them.
Whilst he calmed down, he once again became painfully aware of how close the two of them were, if Loki was a girl, he would have immediately been mistaken for the other boy’s girlfriend.
The thought made him blush and he felt guilty for it almost instantaneously, his body tensed with the feeling. Mobius could feel Loki’s body tensing and he immediately looked down at the friend who was still in his arms.

‘Hey, Lokes, are you okay?’
Loki’s breath stilled, had Mobius noticed? Of course he would, he basically noticed everything about the raven, he somehow figured out even the deepest secrets that he had tried to keep under wraps for so long.
How long would it be until Mobius found out that Loki’s feelings for him were everything but platonic. He decided then and there that this time, he wouldn’t fail at hiding it from his friend.

‘I’m just getting a little cold is all, I didn’t really think about taking a jacket or anything.’
Mobius nodded and Loki stared off into the distance, when he could feel the other boy shift beneath him. A second later a jacket was draped around his shoulders and Loki immediately went to protest, shoving the jacket back to its owner, who was left in only a thin jumper, which Loki duly noted looked incredibly good on him.

‘Mobius, I’m fine, you’re even colder than I am.’
But the blond haired boy protested and layed it back over Loki’s shoulders.
‘Seriously, Loki, take it, we can drive back to my place. If you want to, you can sleep over, we can stay home tomorrow.’ And it’s the words alone that make Loki tear up again, nod and the two of them walk over to the car, Loki keeping Mobius’s jacket on the whole ride back to Mobius’s place.

When the elevator binged and the two of them exited onto the hallway, Loki was already feeling a lot better. His arms had warmed up and he felt a lot more comfortable.
‘My dad’s probably not asleep yet, but he won’t mind us barging in.’
Mobius comforted Loki, who he had learned in the past few weeks, was quite squirmish whenever it came to adults, which had helped raise Mobius’s suspicion when it came to the treatment Loki had to undergo with his parents, or more precisely, his dad.
The raven nodded and followed the other boy into the apartment.
When they had stripped off their shoes, Mobius went and said hello to his father.

When Mobius came back, Loki was already lying on the blond boy’s bed, using his jacket as a blanket, his eyes shut but at closer inspection Mobius could see his eyelids lightly shudder when he heard him enter the room.
‘Hey Loki, you want to get into some new clothes? You probably shouldn’t sleep in some different clothes than the ones you’ve been wearing.’
Loki’s eyes opened and he looked around a little sleepily, then nodded.

‘Yeah, I don’t have any with me, it’s fine.’
Mobius shook his head laughing.
‘What? No, you can borrow some of mine, they’ll probably be a little short on you, but it’s better than nothing.’

Even almost half asleep, Loki’s face went red at the thought, but he couldn’t just say no to that.
‘Sure, just give me something I can change into.’
Mobius chuckled at his friend and threw some pajamas at him, which made Loki groan slightly before pulling the clothes from his face and sat up straight, eyes still half way shut.

Mobius turned around to put away his own jumper, feeling a little too warm with multiple layers on but when he turned back around his body froze.
With the tiredness Loki probably hadn’t been thinking completely straight and had forgotten about his earlier relapse, so now he was sitting on Mobius’s bed, shirtless and the bandages on his arm was something Mobius couldn’t just ignore.
Loki still didn’t seem to realize what Mobius had just seen, until the blond boy spoke up.
‘You want to talk about it?’

As Loki’s head whipped up, he could just see Mobius nudging his head towards the raven’s arm and Loki’s blood immediately ran cold, noticing his slip up instantaneously. He tried to hide his arm behind his back, but he knew the damage was done, there was no way Mobius would ignore this. The blond boy walked over to Loki, already in his pajamas too and sat down, not sparing his arm another glance.

‘You don’t have to, of course, I’m just glad you took care of it and you know, the next time you can always call me.’
Loki felt relieved, he didn’t trust his voice to be stable enough, so he just nodded and lay back down, scooting up towards the many pillows that were basically stacked up against the headboard. Mobius followed.

‘You okay if I lean on you?’
The blond boy asked and instead of answering, Loki pulled him in for a hug, Mobius’s head lying on his chest, which for some reason made Mobius’s skin heat up and his stomach pulled together in weird ways which he couldn’t explain. He wasn’t sure if two best friends should hug like this, should lay together like this, but for now, he wanted to ignore it, wanted to so badly, but he couldn’t. What would other people think of him when they saw him like this?

He wasn’t gay, he didn’t like guys and never had, he knew he never would either. He decided that their friendship just worked like this, a lot of physical comfort, he could still have this kind of a close relationship with Loki whilst being straight, no? He could never imagine himself in that kind of relationship with a man, the thought made his mouth run dry and something close to disgust which made him in return feel even more guilty. He saw nothing wrong with people who were gay, trans or anything else, so why did he feel this way?

But before Mobius could travel too much into his thoughts, Loki pulled the blanket over the two of them and Mobius could feel his eyes slip closed quick enough. The feeling of smooth skin underneath his face and feeling of gauze scraping his face as a hand ran through his hair. 

When Mobius awoke the next morning, he could feel the slight rise and fall of the other boy’s chest beneath his head. As he opened his eyes, he saw Loki still asleep, his long hair falling around his face in incoherent ways.
Mobius looked over at his alarm clock, which only just read six in the morning. He moved himself to lie across Loki’s torso, grabbing his phone and quickly texting Hunter and the others, as well as his dad (he felt too lazy to get up and it was just too comfortable), that he wouldn’t be at school. Then he layed back down, his face back on Loki’s chest and his arm slung around his waist, as his eyes fell closed again almost immediately and he fell asleep to the rhythm of the other boy’s breaths. 

The voices were so loud, god were they loud. Loki couldn’t concentrate, the shouting not stopping, but he felt something a little breath on his chest and as he drifted from his dream back into reality.
He woke up with a start, gasping for breath as he tried to concentrate on where he was and how he had gotten there. When he looked around he could feel a weight on his torso and when he wielded his looks downward he saw a mop of blond hair on his chest and a hand draped over his waist, falling back onto the mattress by his side.

His face flushed and his heartbeat quickened. He tried to calm down, by looking anywhere else other than the boy lying on him at this very moment, but god,was he cute.

The small snores that made up such a calming rhythm, his slightly flushed face, that made his cheeks a nice red shade and his Adam's apple bobbing up and down as he breathed slowly, calmly, in his sleep. Loki had known his feelings had gotten deeper. He didn’t know how to stop them, he didn’t know how to stop himself from flushing every time something like this happened, they were obviously only platonic friends, who often hugged as a form of comfort. Maybe this was how Mobius showed his friendship, with physical touch. He internally cursed himself for once again not being able to differentiate the situations, for taking something like this away from Mobius, seeing the situation so different once again.

It made him have hope, it made him believe that there could at some point be hope for the two of them, that maybe, just maybe Loki had a chance the other boy liked him back. He hated himself for it, it gave him this weird feeling of disgust, running so deep it could eat up his soul and his heart alike.

It was the same feeling he had had when he first had liked a boy, when he had first realized that it wasn’t only girls he felt attracted to, his mind tainted by the words of his father, the words of a man who held so little love Loki was surprised he even had enough for Frigga and Thor in his heart. But even through the bad memories, Loki felt at peace in this very moment, and when the sun started shining on Mobius’s face and he blinked and woke up, his little grin spreading so much light into the raven's heart he almost felt like it might be too much, Loki felt like he might just be the luckiest person on earth.

Chapter Text

When Mobius finally woke up and looked up at the other boy he was currently still resting on, the first thing he noticed was Loki’s smile. He had never seen something that- he didn’t know how to describe it, maybe he did have words for it but didn’t want to name them, so he just made up his mind that Loki looked happy, and Mobius was glad that his friend was.
‘Morning Loki.’
He grinned and moved himself off of the other boy, rolling over to the other side of the mattress, which had very evidently been unused the entire night. 

His mouth and throat started to feel kind of dry and he assumed because he had been lying in the direct sunlight for so long that he had started to feel a bit warm too.
‘Morning, did you sleep well, I hope I didn’t keep you from it.’ Loki said, looking a bit worried about his friend despite the fact that he had seen Mobius sleep peacefully just a few minutes ago.

‘No worries Lokes, I slept just fine. I already told my dad I’m not going to school, so uhm yeah.’ Loki nodded, it felt nice, knowing the blond cared so much about him he would skip a whole day of school to make sure he was feeling alright.
Following his thoughts, he immediately remembered his relapse the day before and suddenly became all too aware of the bandage and gauze that was completely uncovered.

Secretly, he tried to hide his arm as fast as possible, not really wanting Mobius to remember that his injuries were even there, but the other boy, who was currently lying beside him and was also very much watching him, did notice.
‘Hey, Lokes, what I said last night still counts. You don’t need to talk about it if you don’t want to, but I am always there for you and you can always talk to me about it if you want to.’

Loki smiled and nodded, he didn’t feel completely ready to talk about it, but he also felt like he never would be a hundred percent ready for this, so he decided to take a deep breath and start talking.
‘I know you will be, Mobius, but I kind of want to tell you.’
Mobius nodded, for some reason he felt honored, maybe because Loki trusted him enough to tell him something like this, talk about something this deep with him. He nodded and motioned for the raven to continue talking.

‘I, I mean, you know I’ve had a problem with this before, I told you, but I’ve been doing better recently. Just every once in a while I have setbacks, after a really bad fight or something like that, I just don’t seem to be able to stop myself, like it’s subconscious and I can’t switch it off. It’s like I need to do this to myself in order to go on from whatever happened.’

The taller boy took a deep breath and looked at his palms, unable to meet the other boy’s eyes. He didn’t give Mobius much time to respond with anything, before he started talking again.
‘I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about how it’s still happening. I want to get help, seriously. I want to get better, I’ve been better recently, it’s just, I don’t think I can get better on my own. And I don’t think I can get better with just the power of friendship .’

He said and chuckled a bit at his last remark, even though it didn’t completely meet his eyes. Mobius waited for him to continue.
‘But, when I asked for help and my father, when he reacted so aggressively to ma request, it made me feel like I was back at square one, like I wouldn’t ever get better and in honesty, I still don’t feel like I can, it’s just easier to process right now than it as last night.’ Loki finally looked up during his last words, meeting grey eyes that were looking straight at him.

They didn’t show pity for him, not like he had imagined. No, the only thing they showed was compassion and concern for the raven and it made him feel like maybe he could get out of this pit he had fallen into. Mobius waited another second, maybe to process everything Loki had told him, or just to make sure Loki was finished talking.

‘Gosh, I mean, thanks for telling me, Lokes, seriously. And you really don’t have to be sorry for not telling me beforehand, I was never in the situation you are in right now, but I can only imagine how terrifying it must be to admit something like that, no matter how close you are to them. Just in the future, if you ever feel like you need to do that, you can always call me, I will always be there to help you, it doesn’t matter what time it is.’
Loki nodded and smiled, a small, but genuine smile.

‘Oh, come here.’ Mobius said and held open his arms, which Loki let himself fall into without protest. The two of them lay there until they became sleepy again and slept for another hour, when Loki woke up again, the two of them were practically curled around each other, Mobius’s hair tickling the bottom of the raven’s chin. Loki slowly untangled himself from the knots they had created with their limbs and rolled over, grabbing his phone from the nightstand to check the time.

When he switched it on he was me with over a hundred messages and missed calls, all from Thor and his mother. Loki’s heart dropped, his phone had been on silent the entire night and when he had left with Mobius neither his mother, nor Thor had been home. In the heat of the moment he had forgotten to tell the two where he had gone.
He quickly unlocked his phone and started calling Thor. His brother would probably be in school at this point, but Loki didn’t exactly care in this situation.

Thor picked up almost immediately and Loki could hear his worried voice on the other end of the line.
‘Thank fuck, god Loki, where were you, are you okay?’

Loki felt a bit overwhelmed, but took a deep breath and started answering his brother.
‘Hey, Thor, so sorry for giving you a fright, I’m at Mobius’s, I’m fine, I just, I’m sorry I forgot to tell you yesterday.’ Loki could hear Thor’s relieved sigh through the speaker.

‘Good, you can’t believe how frightened mother was yesterday when she came home and couldn’t find you in your room, she thought you had run away, father didn’t know where you were either. Loki, please tell me next time, okay?’ Loki nodded before he realized the other boy wouldn't be able to see him at this moment.
He felt a stinging in his chest when Thor mentioned their father.
Had the man really been so drunk to have a complete blackout? Or did he just not care where his disappointment of a son went? Loki unfortunately suspected the latter. Odin hadn’t been completely sober, but Loki knew what his father looked like, completely drunk, and last night was not one of those days.

‘Yeah, again, sorry, but I’m fine, I’ll call mother in a second.’
‘You do that, stay safe little bro.’ And before Loki could answer, Thor had hung up the call, which might have to do with the voice of a teacher Loki had heard in the background a second before.
Quietly, after checking that Mobius was still asleep, he dialed his mothers number and pressed on the green call button, waiting even more anxiously for her to pick up than he had when had called Thor.

‘Oh gods Loki, please tell me it’s you.’ Sounded by his mothers voice, she sounded panicked and relieved at the same time, though Loki could also hear some fear in her voice.
‘Yeah, I'm a fine mother, I’m at Mobius’s place, I’m sorry I forgot to tell you yesterday evening.’ 

‘No, no Loki it’s fine, everyone forgets something at some point, it was just, I couldn’t reach you yesterday and then Thor told me you weren’t in school either.’ She rushed the words in such a short time, Loki almost couldn’t understand most of them.
‘I understand, I’ll make sure to let you know if I’m spending the night somewhere else next time.’

Loki leaned back against the pillows and drank in the view through Mobius’s window. It truly was a nice view. In the distance you could see the sea which stretched on for ages, but there were a lot of skyscrapers, as well as all of the roads and cars that were diving down on the pavement.
‘I’ll definitely text you when I come home, okay?’

Loki asked and the two of them exchanged goodbyes, as he hung up. He had told neither his brother, nor his mother about the fight he had had with his father, he sighed loudly. He didn’t know how or if he should even bring it up.

His mother must have gotten wind of the many fights Loki and Odin had, and even Thor must have at least heard, the walls in their house weren’t sound proof after all. But how would they ever react to him directly telling them about it, telling them how he had been treated by the man who called himself his father, even though Loki was pretty sure Odin would love to not be regarded as the father of such disappointment. Because, even if he was sometimes sure his mother was too scared to step into their fights, he was a hundred percent sure she would have definitely done something if she had found out her son was being abused by none other than her own husband. 

‘What are you thinking about?’ Loki was brought out of his thoughts, startled by the sudden voice next to him. Mobius was still clutching the pillow he was resting his head on with both of his hands, and Loki wished it was him Mobius would hold like that. He could imagine quite perfectly what the blond’s hands would feel like draped around him, because Mobius had done so just before Loki had woken up and detangled himself from the mess they had caused.

‘Oh, nothing much, I might have forgotten to tell my mother and Thor I was staying at your place, so they kind of thought I ran away.’ Loki finished speaking and Mobius looked at him with a mix of disbelief and humor. A grin spread across his face, before he said jokingly.

‘Oh wow, I’ll try to remind you to tell them the next time.’ Next time was all Loki’s head could comprehend in that moment. Mobius wanted him to stay over some other time, this wasn’t just a one off thing that Mobius considered as a situation that just played out. He had wanted Loki to sleep over, and even if this wasn’t really planned, he had asked Loki, so that counted for Loki.

‘Yeah, don’t worry, I think I’ll remember myself next time.’ Mobius got up after another few minutes and asked Loki if he wanted anything to drink, to which Loki answered and asked for a cup of tea. A few minutes later Mobius returned, two big cups of tea on a tablet, together with some small nibbles, such as waffles, as he handed one to Loki. The situation itself.

Loki lying in Mobius’s bed, the other one bringing him breakfast, smiling at him like a derp, it gave him have hope, too bad hope never came alone, not for him, for him, it was always accompanied by guilt, a feeling he really didn’t want to have and a feeling he resented simply for the situation he felt it in.

At first, he had tried ignoring Mobius for a few days whenever he became all too aware of his feelings, but that theory didn’t seem too work very well, since Mobius kept reaching out to him, even if the raven didn’t text first, and Loki would never ignore Mobius if the blond boy reached out to him. He decided then and there, the taste of waffle and peppermint on his tongue, that he needed to get rid of his feelings, no matter what.
Maybe he and Mobius could be better friends afterward again, but at this point in time, it simply didn’t feel fair of Loki pretending to be the other boys friend, even though each time they talked Loki’s heart was beating double the speed and the blood in his face also seemed to double in amount. 

Loki got dressed as fast as he could when he was done eating, texting Thor the address and that he would like to get picked up, leaving a very confused Mobius. But when Loki said he needed to go and see his mother as fast as he could, Mobius nodded and smiled at Loki, telling him how important it was for him to definitely talk to her about anything.

Loki sighed internally when Mobius had accepted the bait, part of him had been afraid that he would not have believed the raven and would have asked too many questions, he might have just told Mobius the truth if he had asked enough.
Mobius wasn’t exactly sure what had prompted Loki’s change in mood, suddenly, he had become somewhat distant, just eating his breakfast in silence whilst looking over at the blond every now and then.

Mobius wasn’t sure he believed Loki when the raven said he needed to go and see his mother, but he accepted that Loki wouldn’t tell him everything, just because Mobius said Loki could. He himself wasn’t the best at talking and expressing his emotions, so he didn’t blame Loki if it wasn’t the easiest for him either.

It still didn’t make Mobius not feel at least a little bit hurt when Loki had left in a hurry, barely a goodbye spared for the other boy and had headed for the elevator in  quick pace, not looking back or waving once whilst Mobius stood at the door the whole time, watching his friend and waiting until the elevator had reached the ground floor.

He also wasn’t sure why his emotions were so all over the place today, but when he closed the door to his apartment, he could feel slight tears in his eyes and all of a sudden, he also felt quite tired, or more off exhausted, he wasn’t sure where it came from, the last few hours had been probably the most relaxing hours he had spent sleeping in a long long time, he couldn’t remember sleeping that calmly eversice his parents divorce, so, even if he didn't say it, he was just hoping Loki would trust him enough to talk to him about his problems before they became too bad, maybe that could help him at least a little bit, if his father still denied him the help he wanted to get.

Chapter Text

Loki was ignoring him, Mobius had figured out that much, his messages had been left on read for the better part of the week. The day Loki had slept over at his place and had left in such a hurry, the raven had texted Mobius in the evening, telling him that he wasn’t feeling too well and he probably wouldn’t be in school for the rest of the week.

Mobius had been worried, what if something else had happened? He had texted back immediately, the app telling him that Loki had seen the message, but hadn’t replied.
The next morning, Mobius had texted Loki a ‘get well’ message, which had again been ignored.
He had driven to Loki’s house that day, but after Loki refused to open the door for him and excused it with a simple ‘I don’t want you to get sick too’ message, Mobius didn’t feel like taking the spare key and just going in to see his friend. It had been worse when he found out Loki was still very much texting with the others.

The day after Mobius had tried to visit Loki, he was sitting at lunch, the burden of another string of unanswered, but read messages on his shoulders, when suddenly Sylvie had laughed out loud and had shown the group a funny video of a cat.

‘Oh my god, look what Loki just sent me!’
She said, ginning as Hunter tried to suppress her laugh, not wanting to laugh out loud in the middle of the cafeteria. Mobius couldn’t ignore the sting in his chest, did Loki just not want to answer him.
He quickly checked his phone, just to check if he had missed Loki texting back, he almost felt hopeful. But when he opened their chat, the arrows were still blue without a response.

The last message he had sent read  ‘How are you doing? Missing you at school already :/’. Mobius sighed, not noticing how Sylvies gaze flicked from her phone to his face momentarily.
He had spent most of the break in silence after that, maybe he had done something wrong? Had he made Loki uncomfortable when he had rolled over to the other boy at their sleepover? God, he hoped not, if so, he felt bad for it already. He might have found it comforting and comfortable, but what if Loki had found it weird? What if he hated Mobius for it?

The blond noticed himself falling into a spiral, similar to how he had done so often in the past, at his old school, with his old friends, when the person he had trusted the most had talked shit about him behind his back.
He shook his head, he couldn’t be doing this again, it would drive him mad. When the bell finally rang, Mobius and Sylvie made their way to Music together, when Sylvie nudged him in the side.

Glumly, Mobius looked over at her, confused. She looked a bit concerned.
‘Hey, what’s on your mind?’ She asked as the two of them rounded the corner towards their classroom.
‘What do you mean?’
Mobius asked, he wasn’t sure if Sylvie knew what was going on, but within the past couple of weeks he had come to notice how good Sylvie was at just noticing things.
‘I just, you looked kind of sad earlier, did anything happen?’

As the two of them sat down at their designated seats next to each other, Mobius thought about telling her, she would probably find out one way or another anyways.
‘Loki’s been ignoring me, and I quite frankly don’t know what I did.’
Sylvie gave him a worried look, eyebrows furrowed.

‘I mean, at first I thought he was just sick and was too tired to text me, I know that happens, but he’s obviously not sick enough to ignore you, so it can only be something I did and-’ Sylvie cut him off with a hand over his mouth, she realized immediately, that Mobius wouldn’t take ‘maybe it’s something on Loki’s side’ for an answer, he seemed adamant on blaming himself for whatever had happened between them.

‘How long has he been ignoring you?’ Mobius frowned, as he answered.
‘For about two days now, he only texted me once, letting me know he wouldn’t be at school for the rest of the week, but other than that, he’s just been leaving me on read.’

The blond started to play around a bit with his fingernails, seemingly nervous.
‘Hm, did anything happen before that?’ Sylvie asked and could immediately see the boy next to her tense up.
‘Well, he kind of uhm, slept over at my place and I might have, I mean, I think I might have sort of cuddled him.’ Sylvie gave him an unamused look, to which Mobius quickly started defending himself.

‘No! It’s not like that, I swear, really, I’m not into guys I just, what if Loki thinks I am now and is uncomfortable with that? I didn’t mean to do that, it just kind of happened, it wasn’t on purpose.’
All of a sudden, it made a lot of sense to Sylvie, she remembered when she had confronted Loki about his feelings at the picnic, she had noticed how he looked at Mobius, and even if the raven had denied harboring any feelings towards the other, she hadn’t believed him for one second.

She could puzzle together why Loki was acting this way, hell, she’d been in the exact same situation with her first ever crush, a girl from her arts class two years ago. They’d been great friends, but Sylvie had caught feelings for her and suddenly, hugs made her feel nice and guilty and she wanted so badly to get rid of those feelings she eventually stopped being friends with her.

But god did she hope Loki wouldn’t just completely cut Mobius out, it was clear how much Mobius cared about him, whether that be platonic or not, it wasn’t her place to tell, but neither was it her place to tell Mobius about Loki’s feelings towards him, she wouldn’t do that to Loki.

‘I’m sure Loki wouldn’t hate you for something like that, I’m certain he wouldn’t even hate you if you were to be into men, I think you should maybe try talking to him, if whatever is bothering him right now isn’t something he wants to share with you, you should give him some time, but I would definitely try to go and see him, maybe ask his brother for help?’

Mobius seemed relieved at the advice, he had been so caught up in his thoughts and worries, that he hadn’t properly thought about how to talk to Loki, but asking Thor for help seemed so reasonable Mobius almost felt stupid for not thinking about that earlier. He nodded and  looked up from his hands, which he had still been fiddling with nervously.

‘Yeah, I’ll try that, thanks, I think I just needed some advice about this.’ Sylvie smiled, she wanted to help the two of them, and she knew that Loki needed Mobius to stay by his side, even if that meant as just a friend, she just hoped Loki could see that too. 

After school, they all decided to go to Hunter's house, most of them came to school with cars anyways, so they wanted to head to the supermarket on their way back to get some food and drinks before making something to eat together and make a movie night. Before Mobius left though, he waited by Thor’s car, much like the other boy had done with him a few days ago.

When the older boy came towards him, Jane’s hand in his, he looked more than confused. ‘Hey, Mobius, what are you doing here? Something up?’ Mobius nodded slightly before answering.
‘Yeah, uhm, I don’t have a lot of time right now, but if you could maybe give me your number, I kind of need to talk to you about something, but as said, I unfortunately don’t have the time right now.’
If that was even possible, Thor looked even more confused and Jane also gave him a weird look, but the boy still nodded and when Mobius handed him his phone, he typed in his contact information.

‘I uh, thanks, I’ll text you later.’ Mobius said, before waving and heading off towards his car.

When the group of six, Hunter, Sylvie, Ravonna, Casey, OB and Mobius had finally decided on just making finger food, together with fruit like watermelon due to the hot weather, it was already past four in the afternoon once they arrived at Hunter’s house.
Their house was big, not as big as Loki’s, but you could tell they were well off, with both of her parents being doctors.

All of them went into the spacious kitchen and started preparing the food, making wraps, cutting up fruit into a bowl, all whilst talking about funny things that had happened at school.
‘Oh my god, do you guys remember that one time Tony got suspended for a few days for accidentally building a weapon in physics class?’ Ravonna asked, a big grin on her face.
‘Oh god yes, it was such a big deal, even the military showed up at school!’
Mobius looked around at the others in disbelief.

‘Excuse me what?’ Casey looked at him and then he seemed to realize.

‘Ohh, right, you hadn't moved here yet. So, Tony, he’s a year above us.
He’s really smart, almost always top of the year but anyways, one day, there's an announcement that he has to come to the principal's office and I kid you not, not even ten minutes later, three big vans pull up outside and fully armed guys just barge into the school.
We only found out later, but whilst they were supposed to build a circuit in physics, Tony somehow managed to build a completely new and life threatening weapon, the only reason he isn’t in jail or some shit is because his dad has crazy influence in politics and the military and shit.’

Mobius was visibly shocked, how a story like this never made it into the news, but then he remembered what Casey had said about Tony’s father’s influence and it made sense.
‘Any other story?’
Mobius realized a second too late that he was in for a long night. By the time all of them were done with preparing the food and were sitting in Hunter’s backyard, Mobius had heard a bunch of new stories.
Ranging all the way from relationship drama to full no crime rings. Maybe his school was quite fascinating after all.
Currently, OB was telling him about a Senior that had finished school a year before, Steve was his name apparently, who had broken up with his girlfriend of three years because, what the rumors had said, he had come out to her as gay.

Mobius didn’t think that was so big of a deal, and all of his friends agreed on that, OB saying he only told Mobius because it was one of the bigger rumors everyone at school knew. Mobius nodded, he hadn’t really ever known anyone who was gay, he had his suspicions with a few people every now and then, but he thought that it was their business and it didn’t really awaken his interest in who they had feelings for. He knew his mother didn’t support the community, stating her distaste for anyone who wouldn’t follow the ‘traditional family picture’, but then again, she wasn’t even a part of his life anymore.

His dad had never really talked about the topic, it never seemed to be important to their conversations, as it didn’t really affect either of them, but he believed that his dad would probably be quite okay with it, he was a very kind person in general and had never said anything against it. 

When the sky started to become darker and they decided to start a little fire, Hunter said she had to get something from inside the house.
A few minutes later, she returned with a crate of beer, which everyone gladly accepted. Mobius had had alcohol before, but never really in the company of friends, only with his dad every once in a while, and the one time he forced himself to drink the rest of the Vodka so his mom couldn’t do it.
His relationship with alcohol wasn’t great, it reminded him of his mom a lot, but he guessed he just had to make new experiences and new memories to help him get rid of the old ones, or at least move them to the back of his brain and away from thought.

He took a bottle from the crate and Sylvie opened it with the help of another bottle.
A bit too smooth for someone who was sixteen and was technically only supposed to drink at twenty one, but he deemed it not too important.

So whilst they sat around the fire, the air slowly turning a bit more chilly, they told each other more stories, laughing along with funny childhood memories, Sylvie and Ravonna were sitting on a chair together, sharing a blanket, whilst Hunter was preparing some stick bread to bake over the flames. Casey and OB mainly provided the stories, OB seemingly having too much time on his hands and too big of a talent for hacking into the schools online system.

After his third beer, Mobius started to feel a bit more woozy, his face very very warm and everything around him started to feel a little more distant and distorted, the only thing he could still clearly comprehend were his friends voices, which seemed to be in a less drunken state than he was and he suspected they had done this a lot more times than he had. Ravonna seemed to be in a similar situation, her face visibly flushed, and her hands holding up her chin as she seemed to fight her tiredness.

Mobius felt himself laugh quicker at his friends' jokes and soon enough, he found himself doing karaoke in Hunter’s living room together with Casey, as the two of them were singing along loudly to ABBA. Somewhere along the night Sylvie and Ravonna had landed asleep on the couch, Hunter in an armchair and Casey and OB were still sitting in front of the TV, currently laughing at a British kids show about numbers.

Mobus checked his phone and suddenly remembered that he had promised Thor he would text him, clumsily and still very hazy, he pressed on the contact and typed in a message, pressing send before he could read it through again, but he didn’t really mind anyways. He threw his phone to the side and joined the other two boys still watching the show.

Some time around three in the morning, Hunter woke up and found the three of them watching cars on almost full volume, at that moment she was very glad her parents weren’t home. But she thought it was funny too, sitting down with them as they watched it, a bit very excited for juniors in highschool. Mobius eventually took Hunter's place in the armchair, his eyes feeling unusually heavy as he leaned back against the soft pillows. 

Once again, like he had so many times, he dreamt of black hair and green eyes and maybe also the curve of pink lips. The only difference this time was, that he did not forget everything when he woke up.

Chapter Text

When Mobius woke up the next morning, all that was left of last night was a slight headache and the smell of beer and smoke on all of them. Hunter was just glad they hadn’t burnt down the house whilst being drunk.

After they had helped her clean up the kitchen and the rest of the bottles and trash, they all said their goodbyes, each one being sober enough again to drive home, except Ravonna, who had apparently never drunk before last night, being the ever so conformist she was. 

She had woken up with a massive headache and was not happy about it, luckily, her house was on Sylvies way and so she offered to bring her back home. 

The car drive home was uneasily silent for Mobius, he wasn’t used to having the car this silent. Usually Loki would be right by his side, talking and joking with him or singing along to the songs. Like on que, images came into his mind, the flow of his friends black hair, his eyes and even his lips. But whatever Mobius had thought about his friend before, this was in a completely different light, the amorous setting making his head go woozy.

It surely must be a result of being under the influence, he had never looked at Loki that way, he wouldn’t start now, it was just a mistake. Maybe his drunken brain had remembered a nice girl with dark hair and green eyes and just as nice and pink lips like Loki had and had mistaken it for his friend in his dreams.
Yes, that must be it, because he simply couldn’t like Loki that way, why would he? He quickly brushed those obscene thoughts away, scoffing at how scared he had felt for a second, as if he had believed in them for one. It was just a little misunderstanding within his thoughts, nothing to worry about, it happened to everyone once in a while. 

Suddenly, he remembered the message he had sent Thor last night, and when he got home and checked his messages, his messages to Loki still unanswered, he went onto his and Thor’s chat to read the reply the other boy had sent him. 

hey Mobius, my brother hasn’t been feeling well, so I’m sure he didn’t mean it personal, but I could definitely get him to talk to you if you really want that, if it’s okay for you you could come over at maybe two ish, just text me if that’s alright. 

Mobius let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding, he was glad Thor would help him, part of him had been worried the captain would take his brothers side and forbid Mobius from talking to the raven. He quickly typed out a response, hitting send not even a minute later. 

thanks a ton Thor, two sounds good to me

Thor replied with a thumbs up a few minutes later. 

Now all Mobius had to do was wait, it was only just midday and two was still multiple hours away. He decided to take a nice and long warm shower, throwing his clothes in the wash immediately, as they still smelled horribly like smoke and his breath still smelled like alcohol and watermelon. Whilst he was standing underneath the stream of warm water, his mind wandered back to his dreams, but the thought made him feel sick, like he had done the first five seconds after waking up this morning. 

The thought alone made his stomach twist in ugly ways and he wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or not. Because obviously, he didn’t like the thought, it didn’t make him feel good or anything, it made him feel disgusted. And whilst he was completely fine with other people liking the same sex, for himself it sounded so ridiculous it was almost funny again. 

He brushed the thought off once more, not understanding why it kept coming back to him and started washing his hair. 

When he was done, the stench of fire had finally left his skin, making him feel a lot cleaner again, not as stuffy and burnt like he had before the shower. 

He threw on a fresh t-shirt and some shorts, before throwing himself onto his bed, plucking his phone off of the nightstand as he decided to just watch a show for the remaining hour. 

When he had just finished another episode of that weird alien show Loki had introduced him to, he saw that it was around twenty to two, which meant he should probably be going now, to make it to Loki on time. 

He gave a curt goodbye to his dad, saying he was meeting up with Loki as he rushed out of the front door and down to his car, putting on some of his favourite music whilst driving towards the other boy’s house. 

When he arrived, the house looked like it always did, with an impressive front yard, high white pillars and the usual cars parked out front. Mobius wiped his sweaty hands on his shorts as he went towards the front door, he blamed the heat. 

He didn’t have to knock even once, before the door was opened and Thor stood in front of him, a slight smile on his features as he gestured for Mobius to come into the house. 

‘He’s in his room right now, just knock.’ Mobius nodded and thanked the taller boy, before heading up the stairs he had taken so often the past few weeks. When he stood in front of the raven’s door he took a deep breath. He didn’t know what he was so nervous about, the two of them were best friends, Loki could talk to Mobius as much as he could to Loki, there was no reason the two of them would have to keep secrets from each other. 

He knocked once, not getting a response, he waited half a minute, before slowly pressing down the handle, opening the door and slipping inside of Loki’s room. 

Loki was sitting on his bed, book in hand. He didn’t look up when Mobius entered his room, but he murmured something. ‘Hey Thor, what is it?’ He said,without even looking up from the pages. ‘I’m not Thor, Loki.’ 

The raven’s head snapped up, his eyes going wide. The book he had just been reading was shut with a loud clap and his lip parted slightly, somewhere in the back of Mobius’s brain, it registered that movement a little bit too detailed.

‘Mobius, what are you doing here? I thought I told you I was still sick.’ Loki’s tone sounded defensive, but there was something else hidden beneath that, he sounded on guard, as if he was trying to protect something, Mobius noticed this, but his own hurt overshadowed it. 

‘I mean, if you would actually talk to me Loki, I would know, you’ve been ignoring me all week!’ Loki realized that maybe, him ignoring Mobius wasn’t doing either of them any good, he was hurting and obviously Mobius didn’t like the distance either. He sighed. ‘Yeah, I’m sorry, I just.’ He was cut off by the other boy.

‘Look, if it has to do with the hugging and sharing a bed, I swear I don’t mean it like that , if it made you uncomfortable I am truly sorry and I promise I really won’t do it again.’
Loki’s eyes went wide, did Mobius think he was uncomfortable with the physical contact they had? He had never felt as relaxed as the day he woke up with Mobius on his chest, he had never felt as happy, but he couldn’t handle the guilt that was caused by the hope the situation gave him, he didn’t want to like Mobius, didn’t want to hope for something more when the blond obviously only meant it in a platonic way. When Mobius wouldn’t fall for a boy, even less for someone like Loki. 

He chuckled slightly, avoiding Mobius’s eyes as to conceal his hurt at the other boy’s statement.
‘No, really Mobius, I wasn’t uncomfortable with that, I just, I was having a really bad few day’s and I didn’t know how to tell you i didn’t want to spend any time with you without making it look like I was ignoring you, I’m sorry, I really am.’ 

Loki lied easily, he knew it wasn’t going to do him a favor, but if it meant keeping Mobius around for a little longer than he thought, he wouldn’t complain. 

He didn’t think he could tell Mobius why he was actually ignoring him, even if he was threatened by a knife or something like that. 

Mobius felt relieved, he had been so scared, scared that Loki wouldn’t want to be friends anymore, the blond didn’t know what he would have done if that had happened. Of course, he still had the others, but Loki was still the one he trusted the most, the one he confided in the most and next to his dad, probably the most important person in his life at this point.

‘Hey, Loki, next time just tell me, I’m sure I can manage a few days without you.’
Mobius grinned, but all Loki could think about was if Mobius would manage without Loki until the raven got rid of his feelings. Nonetheless, he just smiled and nodded, then, even though he knew this would hurt in the end, even though he knew nothing good would come out of this, he looked back up at the blond and opened his arms.
‘Come here?’
He asked, his voice questioning and quivering slightly. Mobius nodded, his eyes glossed over from the situation, as he stripped off his shoes as fast as possible and flung himself into Loki’s arms.

Loki hugged him tight around the middle, as did Mobius, whilst the shorter boy pressed his face into the other's chest, letting a few tears escape his eyes.  

The two of them lay there for another five minutes, hugging closely like they had done so many times before, but both of them could agree that they didn’t find this uncomfortable, infact, both of them felt more at peace than with any other person, it made Loki calm down in a way he usually couldn’t in his own house, with his father being around all of the time and it made Mobius forget all of his worries, about moving, about his dad, even about Loki. 

‘Hey Loki, you want to go for a walk or something? We could go to the beach, but it's still relatively early.’ Mobius asked and Loki gave his at the moment covered up arm a worried look, which Mobius didn’t miss. ‘We can go to a not so crowded spot, if that’s more comfortable for you, if you don’t want to go we don’t have to.’ 

The statement alone made Loki’s heart flutter, the fact that Mobius thought about his comfort with something like this, it made him feel happy and it made him feel cared for in a way he never had been. 

‘No, that’s fine, I want to go to the beach with you, but a more secluded area would be nice.’ 

Loki gave Mobius a big smile, who grinned back up at him and nodded, getting to his feet immediately and pulling Loki with him.
‘You want to go swimming or nah?’
The blond boy asked and Loki thought about it for a second before nodding. Luckily, Loki had an older pair of swimming trunks to lend to Mobius, even though the thought of the other boy in his trunks was a bit dangerous.

Soon enough, the two of them were hollered in Mobius’s car, on their way to the beach, singing along to songs together again and Mobius realized just how lonely driving was without Loki by his side, without Loki in his day to day life. 

The two of them arrived at the beach not long after, due to his jet ski trips, Mobius had found one or the other quite nice bay, not a lot of people going there, as the sand wasn't smooth or because it was simply too much of an effort to get to them. When Mobius and Loki made their way to one of those bays, Mobius held Loki’s hand, helping the raven down the big and edgy rocks lining the path towards the beach. 

Once they had set up their picnic blanket on the warm and soft sand, Mobius pulled out the drinks they had gotten from the supermarket on the way here,handing one of them to Loki as he himself opened his can. 

‘Thanks’ Loki grinned, cheering his can to Mobius’s, the blond felt blood rush to his face once more, once again he blamed it on the heat. 

‘Anytime’ Mobius smiled back, dimples appearing on his cheeks which made Loki feel stupid for never noticing them before. 

They sat in the sun for what felt like ages, when Mobius realized he probably should have put on some sunscreen before going out into the heat like this, his skin didn’t take nicely to the warm rays of sunshine.
‘Hey Lokes, could you help me put some on my back?’ He said to Loki, after trying to do so himself for several minutes, failing miserably and in return, having the other boy snicker at him. Loki’s face flushed and he was glad that Mobius had his back turned to him. 

‘Sure, give me the bottle.’
Loki started massaging the other boy's back, ignoring how his fingers tingled and his face got impossibly warmer. ‘There you go, all ready, now I won't have to watch you burn.’ The raven joked and Mobius hit him gently on his shoulder. ‘Want to go for a swim Lokes?’ He asked and Loki nodded, the two of them stood up and walked towards the water.

It was cold and Loki shivered when his bare feet met with the sea, but after a few seconds it became pleasant and the two of them went further in. 

They spent another hour or so in the water, playing around and swimming, at one point, Loki was dragging around the other boy on his back, laughing as they splashed water at each other. He ignored the flustered feeling inside of his stomach, the butterflies making it hard to think straight at times. 

Even when they were back on the beach, lying in the sun and eating some watermelon, the sun drying out their skin until they went back into the water, Loki ignored it, that didn't mean that the guilt wouldn't come, it did, right after Mobius dropped Loki off, hugging him and telling him he could always come to the blond.
The raven went to his room as fast as possible, knowing what was going to happen, he could already feel the tears at his eyes.

Chapter Text

Before Loki could however enter his room, a voice from the other side of the hallway caught his attention. He looked around, only to see his brother standing there, brows furrowed and a worried expression on his face. ‘Loki, what’s up? Are you okay?’ Loki’s throat tightened at the question, how was he going to explain to his brother why he was in this state. 

But Thor seemed to have very different worries at this moment. ‘Is this Mobius’s fault?’ He asked hectically and Loki’s eyes widened, realizing what the situation must look like to the older boy. He quickly went to defend Mobius. ‘No Thor, nothing to do with Mobius, I just, It’s not his fault, really.’ Thor looked confused, as if he wasn’t sure what to do with his younger brother's statement. 

‘I’m sorry Loki, if it is, you can tell me, you can tell me anything, I won’t judge.’ Loki nodded, but this still felt a bit too private, he wasn’t sure if he had completely accepted his feelings for the other boy himself yet and sharing it with anybody else seemed a bit too head first. 

Whilst thinking about the other boy, tears started to glisten in his eyes again, an involuntary sniffle leaving his mouth. The memories of just this afternoon flooded his mind and he wasn’t sure if he should laugh or cry at them. He had been so happy, the feeling of total freedom and bliss hadn’t completely left him yet either, but it was overshadowed by the fact that he was just falling harder and harder for the blond every time they met and it couldn’t go on like this, so he wouldn’t be able to experience those feelings for the next while. 

At the sight of his brother’s tears, Thor quickly strode over to his brother, laying a hand onto his shoulder as a way of comforting him. Loki vaguely noticed the weight on his shoulder and it made him smile a bit, it meant a lot to him that Thor was willing to comfort him at times where he didn’t feel all too well, it distracted him a little bit from the actual cause of his gloomy mood. Thor seemed to have noticed that his brother wouldn’t talk about what was going on and instead seemed to opt for distracting the raven instead. 

‘Wanna watch something together? I’m sure we have some popcorn downstairs and you could choose what you want to watch.’ He grinned and Loki nodded with a grin, which held a lot of meaning, even though it didn’t entirely reach his eyes. 

A few minutes later, Loki and Thor were sitting on Loki’s bed together, with a massive bucket of popcorn and some soda, whilst they were watching a show about gods and their children, not the nors ones though, this one was greek. 

Loki laughed along, and each time Thor heard or saw this, it made him feel better, he knew it probably wasn’t the best thing to do, but whilst they were in between episodes and Loki was in the bathroom, he pulled out his phone and texted Mobius. 

hey Mobius, It’s probably not my place to ask, but I know Loki won’t talk about it, but did anything happen earlier? He was kind of upset when he came back

Whilst they were watching episode two, Thor’s phone dinged and he excused himself with the excuse that it was probably Jane texting him. Loki unsuspectingly just nodded and focused back on the TV in front of him, grabbing some popcorn every once in a while. 

In the hallway, Thor took out his phone and checked his messages, not to his surprise, there was one new one from Mobius. 

Uhm, I’m not sure, I mean, it seemed like he was having fun? I don’t know if I did anything or so, but I can’t remember him being upset at anything whilst we were at the beach, sorry, but could you tell me if he tells you anything?

Thor replied to the message with a thumbs up and an of course. He thought it was strange, from the few times his brother had talked about Mobius and also the few times he had talked to the other boy, it had always seemed like he could read people very well, especially his younger brother. But this time? With him saying he didn’t notice anything? 

Thor wasn’t sure what his brother was hiding from him but also his best friend. He wanted to think about it some more, but when he entered the raven’s room again and saw Loki just happily watching his show, he decided that he wouldn’t pry now and potentially ruin his evening once more. 

When Mobius had gotten Thor’s message, he had immediately panicked and thought about every minor detail and conversation they had had that evening to try and find out what he had done to upset the other boy, only answering Thor when he was a hundred percent certain he didn’t do anything he could remember. To say he was feeling anxious was an understatement, he was sitting at his desk for ages, playing around with his fingernails and wobbling with his leg the entire time. It didn’t help, when on Sunday, Thor texted him early in the morning, that Loki hadn’t told him. And when Loki hadn’t answered him upon his questioning and had once again left him on read, it didn’t do any good for his anxiety levels either. 

On Monday morning, Mobius went to class and to his luck, he shared the first two periods of physics together with Loki, who was already sitting patiently at his seat when Mobius walked into the classroom. They talked a bit, but Mobius immediately realized just how closed off the other was being, he reminded himself of what Loki had told him about not wanting to spend time with anyone sometimes and decided he should just ask if he didn’t want to get hurt. 

‘Hey Lokes, I, do you want some space at the moment? You know, like I said it was fine, I just, I think I need to know for myself if that’s fine.’ Loki didn’t meet the blond's eyes when he responded. ‘Just a bit if that’s okay, I just need some alone time at the moment.’ 

The statement stung in Mobius’s chest, he hadn’t realized how much he wanted Loki to deny Mobius’s question, how much he wanted Loki to say he actually did want to spend some more time with him. 

‘Yeah, okay.’ Mobius said, but he didn’t feel like standing behind his response, it wasn’t okay, at least not for him. But he could never see himself going directly against the raven’s wishes, so he knew he wouldn’t just go against them. 

The rest of the class passed in silence, the two only ever exchanging words when necessary, Mobius wanted to reach out to the other boy, comfort him and let him know to come to him with all his problems. He wanted to make all of Loki’s worries disappear, but he knew he couldn’t do that, he didn’t have the power to do so, so he kept still; resisting the urge to hug him in the middle of class.

It came to no surprise when Loki didn’t follow him to the cafeteria when the bell rang, but instead went off to somewhere else. Mobius tried to hide the hurt in his expression, when he got to the others, trying to stay positive about the situation. Mobius himself needed some alone time at points, he knew what it probably must feel like, but he couldn’t help but shake the thought that what if Loki didn’t want to spend anymore time with him after all? That it all was just an excuse to stop seeing the blond. He thought back to how the raven had still texted the other’s, whilst he had ignored him. An ugly feeling set in his stomach, not anger, never anger towards Loki, but plain disappointment, at himself. If Loki was going out of his way to ignore Mobius, it must have been something Mobius had done, not the other way around. 

He thought back to how Loki had denied Mobius accidentally hugging the other boy was a reason for him being uncomfortable, but if Loki had made up excuses to not see specifically Mobius, why wouldn’t he go out of his way to keep the reason he didn’t want to be around the blond anymore a secret either. 

He got pulled out of his thoughts once more, when Casey lightly bumped into his shoulder, looking at him with a bit of concern and confusion at once. ‘Hey, you okay Mobius? You haven’t said anything all break.’ Suddenly, he could feel Sylvie's eyes on him and he was sure she could burn a hole into his head with that stare. 

‘No, I just, I’ve been a bit stressed with final exams and stuff.’ He laughed nervously, luckily, Casey seemed to buy it, Sylvie however gave him a knowing stare, before shifting her attention over to Ravonna, who she had been talking to beforehand. 

When break ended, Mobius got up from his chair, having barely talked at all for the past twenty minutes, the only thing he had said being the date of his history test, which he shared with Casey. 

He was walking towards his next class, when once again, Sylvie caught up to him and patted  him on the back. He looked at the girl unamused. ‘Didn’t go well, talking to Loki I mean.’ She asked and Mobius sighed, not sure what to answer. 

‘No, it went great, we had a really nice afternoon, went out to the beach and all of that, but it’s just, he said he needed some alone time but he keeps hiding things from me, what if he’s hiding why he really doesn’t want to do anything with me I mean, I wouldn’t blame him.’

Sylvie wasn’t entirely surprised at the blond boy’s interpretation of Loki’s behaviour, hell, had she been in his shoes she would’ve probably thought the same, but knowing what she did, she wouldn’t. It made her conflicted, of course, she could understand why Mobius was feeling bad about it, why he might think that Loki just didn’t like him anymore, but she also knew that Loki actually just liked Mobius, that he didn’t ruin their friendship. 

She knew it wasn’t her place to tell, so she wouldn’t, but she didn’t want the two of them destroying their friendship over something like this. Sylvie hadn’t been friends with Loki for long, had never spoken to him before or shared a class, but any time she had seen him in the halls, he had looked miserable. 

The past few weeks, months, with Mobius and the other’s by his side, he had looked genuinely happy, careless and free. She didn’t want this clear misunderstanding to ruin all of that. ‘Look, Mobius, I’m still very sure he would never hate you for something like that, but I’m also sure that if he has to talk to you, maybe I can get him to talk to you properly, but you have to try too okay?’ Mobius nodded, he felt bad for reaching out to another person, just to talk to Loki, but he wouldn’t leave this uncommented, if he did something wrong, he sure as hell wanted the other boy to tell him to his face, so he could better himself. 

The school day passed quickly, and when Loki finally managed to get back home in one piece he laid down on his bed and let out a big sigh. Obviously, he should be grateful, Hogun, Volstagg and Fandral had pretty much laid off on him, leaving him alone most of the time, as Thor was still following him around in the hallways, like a guard dog. But they were still there, and were still at the same school. When not active, they were passively mocking him; giving him dirty looks he could only see in his peripheral vision. They still haunted him, they followed him into his dreams that would make him wake up at night, sweating and panicking, looking around his room only to find himself safe and sound. 

His dreams weren’t kind to him, never. When it was usually him recalling the most violent moments, or something with his friends, the only times he woke up with actual motivation was, when his dreams consisted of the sea, blond hair and a smile that would create dimples in the boy’s cheeks; those were the mornings his mother would find him in the kitchen, making pancakes and listening to music happily. She would smile at him and ask him what got him so giddy in the early hours. Loki never told her. 

When his phone rang, he jumped up startled. He wasn’t expecting a call from anyone, but when he saw Sylvie’s contact calling him, he reluctantly picked it up, holding the phone close to his ear. ‘Hey, Sylvie, what’s up.’ He asked. He hadn’t seen the girl since last week and he was sure that him being absent from the breaks today hadn’t gone unnoticed by her. 

‘Loki, look, I know what you’re going through, but seriously, you should talk to him.’ She said matter of factly, he didn’t know what she meant, maybe he did, but he didn’t want to actually believe himself that she knew, he wasn’t sure if he could handle that. 

‘Wait, Sylvie, what are you talking about?’ He tried, but all he got back was a scoff from the other end. 

‘Okay, just stop ignoring Mobius, I know it’s not easy for you and all, but I don’t want to see you as miserable as you were beforehand, I just, seriously, he cares about you a lot, don’t throw that away, please.’
Sure, the raven had had an inkling that Sylvie knew about his feelings towards Mobius, but now he was a hundred percent sure she knew. He could feel his stomach twisting, he felt cold dread creep up his windpipe.

‘Sylvie, don’t tell him, I’m being serious.’ He spoke, his voice panicked and high pitched. ‘I wouldn’t do that and you know it, but still, talk to him, you can’t just go and ignore him.’ Even if he knew she was right, he didn’t want to accept that, he knew how important Mobius had been, was, to him, but he couldn’t go on pretending that their moments didn’t mean more to him, that he wasn’t dreaming and thinking about the blond all the time. ‘I can’t and I won’t Sylvie, stop bothering me.’ His voice was cold and before she could even put in a word against him, he had hung up on her.

But, before he could lay down his phone again, the doorbell rang.

Chapter Text

Loki went downstairs, he didn’t know who was going to be there, had Thor forgotten his keys? He wouldn’t put it past his brother, usually, the blond was organized, but he did sometimes forget things quite easily. 

When Loki opened the door, he was greeted by a blond standing in front of him, just not the one he was expecting. Mobius was standing outside, eyes cast downwards, hands placed nervously behind his back. When he heard the door open, he glanced upwards, meeting the raven’s eyes. He smiled slightly, still very obviously nervous. ‘Uhm, hey, Lokes, could I maybe come in?’ Loki felt slightly run over by the other boy’s sudden appearance and couldn’t do anything but nod at the blond’s request. 

Mobius entered the house silently, taking off his shoes and following Loki up to his room, the awkward silence spreading between them like fog. Mobius had only very rarely felt this out of place, he wasn’t even sure what he was going to say to the other boy. Just straight up confront him? But maybe that would make Loki even more closed off, even more reluctant to answer him truthfully, how could he possibly go about this without causing a problem?

When they entered Loki’s room, Loki turned around to Mobius, the blond still standing in front of the open door. For some reason, he felt really vulnerable in this situation. ‘So, what is it, Mobius?’ Loki asked and Mobius couldn't miss the way the other boy didn’t spare him a glance, putting his focus on some book that was lying on his desk, barely paying attention to him. It made him feel small for some reason, like he wasn’t actually on eye level with the other boy, like Loki looked down at him and was making fun of him for something he didn’t know. 

‘Hey uh, I know you said you needed time, and I’m really sorry for just going against that, but I just, I need to know if I did anything that upset you, or if something makes you uncomfortable.’ Loki froze, he hadn’t been paying attention to the other boy, or that’s what he wanted it to look like, he didn’t think he could handle a conversation whilst looking straight at the blond. He looked up and for the first time he registered the anxiousness and hurt in the others eyes, the guilt immediately crept up his windpipe, almost making it impossible for him to respond. ‘No, Mobius, you didn’t I swear, it’s just a lot is going on and I need some alone time.’ Mobius didn’t seem convinced by Loki’s answer, his eyebrows furrowed even more. 

‘Are you sure about that, because the cuddling and shit, I can stop that, I don’t need that, it’s fine, I just need to know what it is.’ The blond hadn’t meant to say it with such a cutting tone, it wasn’t too aggressive, but sharp enough to make Loki and himself flinch lightly, he wanted to take it back almost immediately.

‘Sorry, shit, I didn’t mean it like that, I just, I don’t know; I think I’ve been really confused, you’ve been ignoring me for a week now and I just need to know why.’ Loki could see the hurt in Mobius’s eyes when he dared to look up again, and knew that the blond hadn’t meant to snap at him like that. Mobius was a kind person, but with how Loki had been treating him, every one would reach their limit at some point, he knew why Mobius was feeling the way he was, but he just couldn’t tell him, that would be worse than anything else. ‘I didn’t mean to Mobius, I just needed some time alone, no contact or anything, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.’ 

Mobius stomach twisted, why had he still texted the others, why was the raven lying to him again? He felt slight anger starting to boil underneath his skin. He always thought Loki trusted him, but that obviously wasn’t the case. ‘You know what, just tell me if you don’t want anything to do with me, seriously, you texted the others whilst ignoring me, I don’t understand why you won’t just tell me!’ 

The blond's voice was slightly raised at some point and Loki knew that Mobius was more hurt than angry with him, it still hurt, hearing the other’s tone towards him. ‘I can’t talk to you about it, I didn’t mean to make you feel left out or anything, I swear.’ Mobius’s brows furrowed and he gave Loki a look that the raven could only describe as disdain. ‘Lokes, you can tell me anything, you know I won’t judge you, no matter what it is, I won’t even bat an eye, I don’t care if you’re a mass murderer or some sorcerer or an alien, I don’t care, I just need you to know that you can trust me.’ 

The blond’s voice sounded desperate, and both Loki and Mobius knew that that was true, the blond was starting to fall down a spiral and both of the boys in the room could sense it. 

Loki felt a clump in his throat when he went to answer, his chin quivering a little bit. 

‘I know I can Mobius, I know I can trust you and I would with my life.’ Mobius took a step closer, looking at Loki, who in turn finally noticed the tears welling up in the shorter boy’s eyes, glossing over his eyes completely.

‘It doesn’t seem like you do though, does it.’ Now it was the other boy’s voice that quivered whilst talking, but Mobius still had a coldness to his tone, still sounded like he meant every single word he said and Loki wasn’t sure he could handle that. Loki took a deep breath before answering, not knowing if he would be able to bring out a single word otherwise. ‘I know what it must look like and I’m sure I can talk to you at some point, just, I need some time, please.’ After his words had left his mouth, the first tear fell from Mobius’s eye’s. ‘When will that be though? I’m sorry Loki, but I feel like you don’t trust me at all, like you put me in line behind all the others but somehow forget I’m still there once it comes to me, how am I supposed to know you will ever trust me?’ 

‘Mobius I do trust you, that’s why I can’t tell you, I just, I’m afraid, okay?’ Mobius felt the anger rising once more, this time worse and more aggressive. ‘Afraid? Oh, because guess what, you hate me and you just want to let me down slowly, because you can tell the others you don’t like me and that’s why you can’t fucking tell me huh?’ Loki felt his temper rising equally to the others, he wasn’t sure why he was so angry all of a sudden, but he was getting so frustrated at Mobius’s interpretations he just didn’t know how to act anymore. 

'Mobius, no! I don’t hate you, you’re the closest friend I have, it’s just complicated okay? I don’t think you would understand!’ The moment the words left Loki’s mouth, he knew he had made a mistake, he had never seen Mobius this mad before, this… betrayed, he wasn’t sure anymore if what he was feeling was guilt or anger or something completely different. 

‘I wouldn’t understand it?! Loki I’ve been there for you this whole time, I was there for you when the others were still picking on you, I was there when you had fights and I wanted to cheer you up, I drove out here god knows how often to pick you up in the middle of the night, and not just because you asked me to and I wanted to be a good friend, no, because I actually goddamn care about you and I want you to be okay, I still do and I hate seeing you like this because I don’t want to be another reason for you to feel this bad okay?!’ Mobius could feel the tears dripping down his face, he knew he probably looked pathetic at this point, but he didn’t care, he just wanted this to turn out okay, he wasn’t sure that it could be anymore. At the blond’s words, Loki had felt his heart skip a beat, but it wasn’t taken into consideration how those words could have meant something more than friendship, he couldn’t hope right now, he couldn’t go out and confess to Mobius just because of some stupid hope that probably wasn’t actually valid anyways. 

‘I can’t talk about it with you right now, I know how much you care about me Mobius and I owe my life to you, you saved me, but I just, I can’t.’ Loki's voice broke on those last words and the dam finally broke on his eyes too, letting the tears stream freely down his face. When he looked up at Mobius again, there was something weird in the other boy’s eyes, something he couldn’t place, he didn’t know if it was anger, pain, disinterest, he didn’t know.

‘If you can’t talk about it with me, maybe we shouldn’t talk at all.’ 

Loki’s heart froze, his eyes widened when he heard Mobius talk, he couldn’t mean that? Surely he wasn’t serious about that, it couldn’t be. The feeling spread from his heart to his entire body, and only once it reached his every corner did he know what it was, pain and dread, fear and love, all bundled up within his body, crushing the voice out of him and suffocating him underneath it. His mouth was open slightly, as silent tears streamed down his face whilst he was trying to find a way to respond to Mobius.

‘You don’t actually mean that, right?’ But when the blond’s eyes met his, he knew he was in the wrong. Mobius nodded slowly. ‘I am Loki, look, I care about you, more than I have about anyone beside my dad in ages, but I think it’s best for us. I don’t think I can keep up with this, with you.’ Without a second glance at the raven, Mobius turned around and left Loki’s room, leaving the other boy alone with his thoughts. 

Somewhere far away, Loki could hear the front door closing and a car drive away, but inside of his head, he was somewhere completely different. Suddenly everything felt weirdly wonky and at the same time everything seemed out of place, he stumbled into the bathroom, only realizing where he was when he caught his reflection in the mirror, ugly and deformed. No wonder Mobius had left, no matter if it was a platonic or romantic breakup, Loki wouldn’t want to be seen with someone, something, like himself either. The revelation only made the tears stream down his face faster, no end in sight, as he gripped the sink for support when his knees started to go wobbly.

Loud and gut wrenching sobs left his mouth, making his body shake and he eventually fell to the floor, landing on the hard tiles when his arms gave up on supporting his body. He sat there for god knows how long, in his mind it felt like hours, but he wasn’t sure. He wasn’t even sure if he had processed and realized the entire situation yet, but he hoped he had, he wasn’t sure if he could handle it all again. His face burned, his lungs did too, his eyes stung and his nose was running, he didn’t know what to do anymore, so he reached for the little metal tin at the back of the shelf. He fumbled with the lid like it was his only lifeline, like he had once clung to Mobius. He let himself run free, not caring when the red blotches stained the carpet underneath his feet, not caring when his vision started to blur and fade in and out of existence. 

He woke up a few minutes later, his head hurting from the impact it had made, but a quick check revealed that nothing was bleeding, not that Loki cared. 

Ten minutes later he was lying on his bed, bandages and gauze wrapped around his arms like they were some kind of Christmas presents to unwrap. He thought about what had happened, maybe he should have chased after the other boy, maybe he should have begged Mobius to give him another chance, to believe him, maybe he should have told Mobius, but that was quickly tossed away; even now he couldn’t think of the possibility that he just confessed to the other boy. The thought made him feel sick on a different level and he wasn't sure how to handle that. He laid in bed for the rest of the day, his eyes swollen and hurting, until his mother came in to check, she sat down next to him and stoked through his hair gently, whilst telling him about fun stuff he had done before, she knew he wouldn’t tell her about what had happened, but she still let him know he could tell her anything.

Loki had nodded to that and twenty minutes later, she had brought some frozen peas for his headache and sore eyes, as well as some tea for his throat, which was strained from crying. The gesture had made the raven’s eyes tear up a bit more again and he had gladly accepted the hug she had offered him when she saw. When she left, the raven let out a small sigh, she hadn’t noticed the bandages hidden beneath his jumper and that was the most relieved he had been the entire evening. It wasn’t late yet, but by the time ten at night rolled around, he was fast asleep, not peacefully, no, he was stirring the whole entire night and his dreams were a constant replay of what had happened earlier that same day.

He woke up every few hours, tears streaming down his face and his breathing panicked, he didn’t know what to do, he felt helpless, he knew that during their entire argument, he was in the wrong. Mobius was completely right about everything he had said, and Loki started believing, that maybe he deserved for their friendship to end like this, maybe he deserved this for wanting more from Mobius, dreaming of more, when he always knew that that just wasn’t a possibility.

Chapter Text

When Mobius got home, he immediately called Sylvie, the whole car ride from Loki’s to his place had been a mess and he had to pull over several times because he couldn’t see the street through his tears. He didn’t want their friendship to end like this, he wanted to stay Loki’s friend, but he wasn’t sure he could do that when the raven so obviously placed none of his trust in Mobius. But even if that was his view it didn’t make him feel any better about the situation, all in all he felt miserable, the sting in his chest that he couldn’t ignore or the still spilling tears were probably enough of a hint at that, he felt like he just wanted to curl up and never leave his room anymore.

He slumped down onto his bed, waiting for Sylvie to pick up, and after a few rings he could hear the familiar voice on the other end. 

‘Hey Mobius, what is it?’ The momentary silence was interrupted by Mobius’s sniffing, trying to get his tears from falling. ‘Mobius, you okay?’ Sylvie sounded concerned now and the blond could practically hear the way her eyebrows furrowed and the sides of her mouth turned downwards. He tried to force a slight smile when he answered, even though he knew she couldn’t see him.

‘I, Loki and I had a fight, I just, I felt so frustrated and it kind of got out of control and I don’t think we're friends anymore and I just don’t know what to do.’
His voice broke at the last couple of words, he quickly held a hand in front of his mouth, not wanting the other girl to hear for some reason. Sylvie however quickly replied, comfort and a bit of pity lacing her tone.
‘Oh Mobius, I’m sorry, Ravonna is over at my place right now but do you want to come over too? We can watch some stuff, maybe it’ll make you feel better.’ 

The blond boy felt glad at the offer, he didn’t know if he wanted to be alone with his feelings at the moment. ‘Yeah, uhm, could you just quickly send me your address, I’ll come over in a bit then, thanks.’ His words came out smaller than he expected, making him feel inferior in a weird way, even though he knew there was no reason to feel that way.

This car ride was a lot calmer and Mobius somehow managed to get to Sylvie’s place without having a meltdown or causing a traffic accident on the way. When he finally pulled up to the girls place, a very nice old style brick building with a record store on the lower floor, he went over and rang the doorbell, waiting for her to open the door.

As he was standing there, nothing but the chilly breeze to distract him, the weight of the situation suddenly came crashing back down to him and when the door finally opened, Sylvie was met with a crying Mobius. Without thinking about it, she pulled the other boy into the tight hallway, closed the door behind him and hugged him for a while.
Mobius just rested his chin on her shoulder, his arms hanging limply at his sides. After a few minutes Sylvie pulled back and looked at Mobius, who wasn’t crying anymore, but was still very obviously not doing ok. 

‘Come on upstairs and let’s distract you a little, okay?’ She smiled at him slightly and Mobius nodded, letting himself be dragged out of the hallway and up a flight of stairs into a nicely decorated living room. The walls were a light beige and the wooden flooring made squeaky sounds every other step; the first thing the bond boy however noticed was the bright orange sofa standing in the middle of the room, in front of a TV and a low table with a record player on top. Ravonna was sitting on said sofa, a mug in her hand as she smiled up at Mobius kindly, scooting over to the other side so there was more space next to her. 

Mobius took that as an invitation and sat down on the couch next to her, whilst Sylvie sat down in the matching orange armchair that was beside the couch.

‘Do you want to talk about it?’ Sylvie asked, looking over at Mobius, who had sunken into the pillows that were stacked on the couch. He shook his head slightly, then answered. ‘Maybe later, but I don’t really think I can right now.’ Sylvie just nodded and then, as if the whole thing with Loki had never happened, she started talking like it was a normal day. 

The afternoon passed quickly, the three of them spending most of the time playing Mario kart or other games that Sylvie had dug out of an old box of games for her Wii. The blond boy barely contributed to the conversation, but he was content with just listening to the other two girls talk about random things and when it got too late and Ravonna also had to leave, Mobius was glad he went to Sylvie first, a distracting afternoon had been the right thing, keeping most of the negative thoughts out of his head. When he was getting ready to leave, Sylvie had patted him on the shoulder and had let him know to just call her if he did eventually want to talk about it and Mobius had nodded, thanking her for her support during this. 

He slumped down onto his bed almost immediately, the weight of the day crashing back onto him as he thought about all the things that had happened today. He had a not very exciting school day, probably the worst fight he had ever had with anyone and also a kind of fun and distracting afternoon with some friends. 

He knew this was going to hurt for some time, he had been through a similar thing before, back at his old school, when he had found out his best friend had been shit talking him to everybody he knew behind his back. That time he had just been lucky that most of his other friends didn’t believe the rumors and actually had his back; didn’t make it hurt less. 

Mobius sighed, at least he knew how to deal with it somehow at this point, he would be sad, yes, but he would just have to try and move on as best as he could with his normal routine, he would still go and hang out with his friends, he would try his hardest in school and he would still do his best on the football team. The finale was going to be soon, their school having beaten all of the surrounding highschool teams, he really had to focus on that at the moment. 

The blond boy briefly worried if Thor being Loki’s brother and also captain of the football team would propose a problem for him, but he decided that was one too many problems to be thinking about at the moment for him to care too much.

That night wasn’t easy for Mobius, and he only managed to fall asleep in the early hours of the morning, tears still staining his face as well as his pillow before sleep took over. His dreams weren’t any nicer, shouting from himself and Loki echoing in his ears and when he woke up he thought he could still hear their words in his head. 

He dragged himself to school, the only thing cheering him up being OB, who briefly asked the blond if he was okay, to which Mobius shortly explained the situation to him. OB had hugged him for a short while, before saying he would have Mobius’s back and that he could always talk to OB. Mobius had thanked him, feeling glad at the support he got from his friends so far, making him feel like maybe he could get through this a bit easier and a bit painlessly than he thought he would. 

After their first break of the school day, Mobius headed for his English class together with Hunter, whom he shared it with; he unfortunately also remembered how he shared the class with Loki, who he had sat next to for the past couple of months. When he entered the room, Loki didn’t seem to be there yet, which made it a lot easier and guilt free for Mobius to change his seats and sit next to Hunter. When Loki arrived, his eyes immediately shot for the place he usually sat at, noticing quickly that Mobius was in fact not sitting at his usual seat. He didn’t have to search for the blond boy for long, as he was sitting just on the other side of the room, chatting with Hunter; neither of them seemed to notice him.

Something pierced Loki’s chest from the inside out, making his breathing still for a moment as he sat down at his usual table. A part of him had hoped that Mobius hadn’t meant the words he said yesterday, he had hoped that maybe Mobius would still talk to him, still acknowledge his existence instead of completely crossing Loki out from his usual routine. 

He knew that Mobius was just on the other side of the room, it would take the raven less than ten seconds to get there, and yet, he had never felt further away from the other boy, and had never felt lonelier either. Even though Loki had been on this school for way longer than Mobius had, Mobius had made friends almost immediately and had introduced Loki to them, it was like Loki was the new guy in town, so of course it would make sense for the others, Hunter, Sylvie, OB, Casey and even Ravonna to be on Mobius’s side during this. 

They couldn’t not be on the blonds side, Mobius hadn't done anything wrong and the raven somewhat thought he deserved this treatment, maybe it all was too good to be true, why did he ever think that he would finally start having a normal life? He knew that no matter how great his time with the others had been, it would all come to an end eventually, nothing that good would ever last, not for Loki. 

In fact, it made him happy, seeing Mobius talk to the others, have a good time, because no matter what the situation between the two was, he would never wish for Mobius to be treated like he had been. He liked, maybe even loved, he wasn’t entirely sure, the other too much to actually hold a grudge against him. 

English class was a pain, he kept subconsciously glancing over to the other boy, feeling a weird kind of disappointment and hope when he caught Mobius looking in his direction every now and then. The bond would always look away as fast as possible, talking to Hunter immediately, who sometimes glanced in his direction uninterested. It made Loki feel small, it felt like false hope, he was hoping the other boy would stand up and talk to him again, he wished for it, but even after the day ended, nothing had happened, and the hope he still clung onto was chipped away slowly. 

When he got home, the only car he recognized in the driveway was his fathers, there were a few other cars around that he didn’t know, presumably Odin’s friends. He dreaded being at home alone with him, their fights had only escalated in the past few weeks, Loki throwing himself into one after the other and he wasn’t sure that he would be able to keep his temper in check at the moment. He briefly thought about turning around and going somewhere else until everyone else arrived, but alas he didn’t even have a driver's license and there was nothing in the area that he could get to on foot. 

The house smelled lightly of beer when he came in, his father and a few other men he vaguely recognized from the times they had come over for a work celebration. He tried to be as silent as possible, but just as he was about to go upstairs, one of the men came down the hall and spotted him. He turned around and called out. ‘Hey, Odin, ya son is ‘ere!’ Loki internally cursed himself for not hurrying up to his room faster, as Odin came poltering into the hallway, skin slightly red from the alcohol. 

‘Oh, I thought it was going to be Thor, hurry up and disappear before anyone else sees ya.’ The man snarled and Loki made sure to follow the man’s words, hearing a ‘I didn’t know you had a sissy for a son.’ as he walked up the stairs. Of course, the second he came home he had to listen to stuff like that, Thor would have gotten a very different greeting, maybe a clap on the back and a beer in his hand. 

He didn’t know what to do with himself, the school day had been a weird mix of emotions for him, the biggest one being the everlasting sadness that had seemed to overshadow his life once more. That however was closely followed by embarrassment, it had felt oddly lonely, walking the halls alone, he felt vulnerable and had heard a few more whispers than he had the past few weeks, it made him want to avoid halls and the other people in general; which was why he had almost come in late for his english class. 

He for some reason hoped that Thor would be home soon, but that would probably not be the case, the finale for this year's football season was soon and Thor had shoved in a lot more practices for the team after school, in addition to the usual one on wednesday afternoons. Plus, Thor and Jane would often go out for something to eat after practice, so his brother probably wouldn’t be home before dinner anyways. 

The afternoon was boring, Loki tried to read, but the laughter of the men downstairs was so loud he couldn’t concentrate on any words, the memories of the fight that he and Mobius had had yesterday which kept coming back into his mind didn’t help either. 

When the sounds downstairs finally calmed down and he heard the cars leaving, he relaxed, the remark of one of the men from earlier hadn’t left his mind either and he kept thinking about it. Why did people have to think about him that way? He didn’t even know the people and the first thing they said about him was something mocking him or something else. When Thor finally came home, the boy knocked on Loki’s door and checked in with his brother. 

The thought of telling his brother about what had happened between him and Mobius flashed across his mind momentarily, but he brushed that off quickly, that would only complicate Mobius’s position on the football team. 

Thor just nodded and left the raven alone again, who fell asleep quickly from exhaustion.

Chapter Text

Mobius tried to get through the next few days as usual, he tried not to pay too much attention to Loki, who he unfortunately shared quite a lot of classes with. But he always managed to sit somewhere else and then tried to pretend like he didn’t see Loki looking over at him almost all of the time, but he had to admit that on the first day after the fight, he caught himself looking over at the other boy just as often. 

But with the additional and long practices, he came to school exhausted almost every day, making it almost impossible to even think about the other boy while at school, that didn’t mean Loki wouldn’t appear in his thoughts once he came home from school and would lay down on his bed or sit down at his desk doing homework into the late hours of the night. 

Today he had just finished the first two periods as he slumped down at their usual table for break, Casey and Ravonna already sitting in their usual seats. Casey looked at him concerned. 

‘You okay man? Those practices are really taking a number out of you aren’t they?’ Mobius just nodded, his head still on the table. ‘You tell me, I feel like I just ran a marathon whilst sleeping, everything is sore and I still have more practice today!’ As he said that, OB dropped down next to Mobius, looking equally as exhausted as the blond boy was. 

‘Hey OB, how’d your test go?’ It was Ravonna who asked the question this time, OB’s mood seemed to lighten as she said that and Mobius could only speculate that it did in fact turn out good before the boy could answer himself. ‘Oh it was actually really good, I got through everything just fine!’ OB grinned at them.

All of them knew just how much of a genius the boy was at physics and math, and even if he was a big fantasy and sci fi fan in his free time, they all were certain that he could easily study math without even struggling.
‘Glad to hear.’ Ravonna smiled.
A few minutes later Sylvie and Hunter arrived, Sylvie taking her spot next to Ravonna and Hunter sitting down on the other side of Mobius. There was an awkward empty chair between Mobius and the other girl, a weird reminder of what had happened to him and Loki, but Hunter just pushed the chair out of the way and scooted over to the blond. 

The rest of the break went by peacefully, at last for Mobius, he didn’t see how Loki had gone into the cafeteria and had frozen as he saw the other boy, turning on his heel and running away into their previous place underneath the stairs. 

Loki didn’t know how to handle the situation, how was he supposed to act when every time he saw the other boy he would just feel guilty, before he knew what was happening, tears glistened in his eyes as he hugged his knees close to his chest. He sat there for what felt like ages, not doing anything, just sitting there. He was glad no one in his family knew what had happened between him and Mobius but he was sure they would notice sooner or later if he just stopped going out. He already dreaded the questions, from his mother, from Thor, never from his father, he wasn’t sure Odin had even realized that Loki had made friends. 

When the bell rang and Loki finally got himself to stand up, the halls were already packed with students hurrying to their classes, Loki barely avoided getting pushed around by a very hectic student. As he was swaying to the side a little but continued walking, he suddenly tripped and almost fell face first onto the floor. When he regained his balance he looked back, only to see a laughing Fandral and Hogun leaning against the lockers, Fandral's foot still sticking out. The raven tried to ignore it, but he was pretty sure the two boy’s weren’t the only ones who were laughing at him. 

Head lowered in shame he continued walking, trying to ignore the pointed fingers and laughs he got. But Loki had never been good at ignoring things like this, they got to his head within seconds and he found himself hurled into a bathroom, leaning against the door with tears rolling down his face. He wasn’t sure himself if they were from embarrassment or something else, but all his mind would give him as an answer were the whispers and laughs and grins he had seen and heard within the past few minutes. He heard the halls clear out outside of the bathroom and got himself ready to head to class, washing his face to get rid of some of the redness caused by his tears.

When he was drying his hands, the bathroom door suddenly opened, Loki paid them no mind and dried off his hands further. His action was however interrupted when the other boy started talking. ‘Oh, look, hello Loki.’ The raven’s blood froze, he knew that voice, had known it, he hadn’t heard it in a while, but it always plagued his dreams, always came back to him, reminding him of how he wasn’t worth anything and deserved everything that happened to him. 

The blond was standing in the door, the same evil grin on his face as earlier, when he had tripped Loki in the hall. Fandral put the phone that he was recently holding into his back pocket and took a few steps towards Loki, which made the younger boy step back a few steps immediately, fear already on his face. ‘What do you want?’ He asked, trying not to sound afraid but he failed when his voice quivered slightly and he knew he probably looked like a deer in headlights as of now. 

‘Oh Loki, I think it’s been way too long since we last saw each other, don’t you think, I mean, I gotta make up for all the lost time, no?’ Before Loki could answer anything, the first punch landed on his side, taking any and all the air out of him. Unfortunately for Loki, Fandral knew very well how to fight and within seconds the blond had swept away his feet, making the raven’s knees buckle as he slid down the wall, already gasping for air. 

Loki thought about asking the other for a second, asking him why he was doing this to him when the raven couldn’t even remember one instance in which he had upset or been mean to the other boy; but he quickly decided against that. He didn’t care what Fandral’s motives were, he was sure he deserved all of this, for how he had been to Mobius with how upsetting he had been to his father and maybe even Thor; he knew this was what he deserved and what was only fair for him. 

When the other boy once again exited the bathroom, Loki was left with a lot more than his initial tears. His nose was bleeding, his whole body was aching and he was sure his chest, stomach and back would be all battered and bruised in a few hours. He had to think of a way to hide them during PE. No one actually cared about him that much, but even his classmates couldn’t ignore bruising to this extent and he didn’t want to worry his family, more precisely Thor and his mother any further than he had already done with his previous behavior. 

He wiped off the blood on his shirt, the stinging bringing back Fandral’s face into his thoughts; Loki hadn’t fought back, not that he couldn’t but he didn’t see the point in that, didn’t see the point in trying to defend himself when he wasn’t worth defending. A deep part of his brain had hoped for someone to come in, someone to stop this, but alas, no one did and also no one saw Loki as he exited the school building limping and made his way to the bleachers.

The sun was shining brightly as Loki sat down underneath them, the only sounds surrounding him being the birds chirping away happily within the high trees surrounding the school's premise and the voices of the football team, who had taken to another practice, this time during school hours. He peeked through the bleachers, trying to catch a glimpse of the blond boy he had been thinking about so much lately. 

His vision wasn’t the best, and so most of the people he could see that ran by became nothing more than a blur in his vision; until he saw Mobius. For some reason, he could make out the other boy’s features even from so far away, the way his football jersey stuck to his back in this heat and the way his hair stood up slightly with sweat. He immediately sat back down, feeling guilty and a weird form of embarrassment from peeking at the other boy. He was just glad that nobody had seen him.

Mobius had probably never felt warmer than he was right now, his skin was itching all over and all of his clothes were disgustingly sticking to him, but at least the game was fun. Thor had pulled another practice into the normal hours of school this time and no one was really complaining, at least Mobius wasn’t, he got to skip two periods.

The game was in three days and Thor was just trying to perfect all of their techniques and strategies, so far everything was going great and the captain really had nothing to complain to them about. 

After practice they all went for a shower, which everyone was glad for, as the changing room smelled horrible like just one spray too much of axe deodorant. Mobius however was also glad for the singular shower stalls, not like he had a problem with seeing other people, he didn’t care about what his teammates looked like, it was more about other people seeing him. 

He was quite good at the sport and was even on the lineup for Saturday, even though he had only been playing on their team for a few months at this point, but that didn’t mean he was by far the fittest.
He didn’t care what anyone else looked like, but when Thor showed off his biceps after a goal or his abs showed when he rubbed the sweat from his forehead, it made Mobius painfully aware of what he looked like in comparison. He had never been entirely lean, more of a healthy in between and it hadn’t really bothered him, until someone had pointed it out to him.

George, or Ge for short; his old childhood friend. They had met when Mobius was around five years old in preschool and had basically been inseparable, well, until they were fifteen. 

Mobius had friends back at his old school, no one ever really had a grudge against him and he got along with pretty much everybody. There was his group of friends, but he had grown away from them pretty quickly after he had moved to Texas. He remembered when one of his friends had told him the first time that Ge was shit talking to him behind his back, it was around the time that his mom started drinking more and within the next few months his life was tipped over completely.

It started with jokes that sometimes were just a little too personal, revealing things about Mobius that he had told Ge in confidentiality, like that one time he had kissed Amanda at their christmas party at school only for him to end up with a glass of coke on him.

He had tried not to take it seriously back then, not even when he started to make comments about his physical appearance when they were getting changed for PE. But for some reason those had always gotten to him and had made him stand in front of a mirror, beating himself up again for eating one too many portions when he was stressed, more times than he would like to admit. After Ge had officially stopped being his friend, he had gotten better, he still had his other friends, but between losing probably his oldest and most important friend and his parents fighting more often than not, he found it hard to properly appreciate them. 

His self acceptance had gotten a bit better, he could wear what he wanted without feeling bad, could eat what he wanted, but others seeing him naked? That was still a big no, even the times where he went swimming with his friends was a challenge for him and he had once again found himself in front of the mirror in his swimming trunks the night before, debating whether he should just say he was sick or not. 

In the end though, he always went and in some way it got easier, the thought about his appearance visiting his mind less frequently, around his friends at least. When he was with the football team, he couldn’t stand to look at himself, not when some people on his team looked like they could be put up in a museum as statues of warriors. 

When he was walking to his car, the warm summer air seemed to be practically boiling his freshly cooles skin and he made sure to get into his car as fast as possible. The drive to OB’s house was by far the longest from their school on out. The small boy lived in a big concrete block almost in the middle of nowhere, and when he rang the doorbell, a woman that had a look so cold he could feel shivers even through the warm sun rays hitting his back, he wondered how a bubble of sunshine like OB could ever be a child of someone like this. 

The evening was relaxing and filled with laughter, contrary to the rest of the house, OB’s room was nothing but a mess, books and paper everywhere, including the walls and on the chairs and sofas and chalk dusting over a lot of things. But he also had a big amount of old playstations and game consoles, which they all found the best part of as they crowded around OB’s TV to play some mario kart, frogga and other games. 

At some point, Mobius handed his controller to Ravonna, who hadn’t played any round yet. As she leaped up from Sylvies side to go and sit with the others, Sylvie looked over at him. ‘And, anything new?’ She asked, but Mobius just shook his head. ‘I don’t think there will be anything new.’ In response, the girl gave him a questioning look. ‘Maybe you should try again, maybe then he'll talk to you properly.’

The blond boy thought about it for a second before shaking his head determinedly. 

‘No, if he wants to make it right he should talk to me first.’

Chapter Text

When Thor got home, his mother’s car was still gone, either she was out with some friends, or like he suspected, still working. He hoped his brother was fine, Loki had seemed somewhat more resigned for the past week and he knew how him and their father fought more frequently when one of them was stressed or something else. 

The blond had had a nice evening, after their very pleasing practice, which had given him even more hope that they could actually win the finale, he and Jane had gone out for some nice dinner and he had been surprised that when he was talking about his brother, one of the waiters, a girl with ginger hair had seemed to know him. 

‘Sorry for the intrusion, but are you perhaps talking about Loki?’ Thor had looked at the girl confused, how would she know his brother? A secret girlfriend maybe? He wasn’t sure, so he answered her confused, Jane not understanding the situation any better. 

‘Yeah, he’s my brother, how’d you know him?’ The girl's eyes lit up. ‘Oh you must be Thor then! Loki and his friend came here all the time, haven’t seen them for like one and a half weeks though.’ She smiled, but Thor was even more confused, was this friend Mobius? Why would the two of them go here? Wasn’t this like date material and not a place where you go with your best friend? ‘Oh, sorry, I forgot to ask your name, unfortunately Loki doesn’t talk about his life that much so he never mentioned you.’ The blond said, trying to sound the least amount of insulting whilst Jane was silently laughing at him from across the table, watching him try to phrase his words correctly. ‘No worries, I’m Wanda and my brother, the one with the white hair over there is Pietro.’ She pointed in the direction of a boy who was probably around Wanda’s age too, maybe they were twins? Feeling three pairs of eyes on him, Pietro turned around and sent his sister a grin, coming over to them once he finished serving his table. ‘Hello everyone, do you need some help or advice?’ He asked in a professional waiter manner, but Wanda just laughed and shook her head. ‘No Pietro, this is Thor, Loki’s brother and this is Jane, his girlfriend.’ 

Pietro’s eyes widened when he realized who was sitting in front of him. ‘Oh, glad to meet you, I always pictured you to look more like Loki you know, not complete opposites, but cool to get to know you both.’ He grinned and flashed the couple a toothy grin. ‘I haven’t seen Loki and Mobius in a while now though, starting to miss’em.’ He said, frowning slightly, before something on his apron blinked and he hurried off to the kitchen again. 

‘Always busy at this time of day, have you decided on what you want to order yet?’ She asked and the two of them ordered their respective dinners. The rest of their dinner went by peacefully and both Thor and Jane had a nice evening, Pietro bringing them a free dessert because they were, as he said, friends family, also helped to lift their spirits even more. 

So when Thor brought Jane home and kissed her goodbye, she thanked him for the wonderful evening, to which he told her she should thank the twins. 

When he walked up the stairs to his room, he stayed still in front of his brother’s room. There was no light shining from the bottom of the door, so he assumed Loki was probably already asleep and he decided he wouldn’t wake the other boy up now. The twins' statements had made him think though, could there be something more between his brother and Mobius? Sure, Loki had told him that Mobius wasn’t into guys when he had assumed the first time that there was something more than friendship between the two boy’s, but not everyone knew right from the start and maybe Mobius had just told his brother later? 

Many instances came to his mind now that he looked at it from a different angle, only the two of them going to a diner all of the time, Mobius sleeping in Loki’s bed a lot and Loki also sleeping over at the other boy’s house, Loki randomly driving off with Mobius in the middle of the night after a fight with Odin so loud he could even hear it in his room? Surely none of that was just platonic. Of course, he had to take into account that what he considered platonic, which was in terms of physical contact nothing more than a hug or a slap on the shoulder, might be not even close to what other people considered as platonic, but in all seriousness, he didn’t think that whatever was going on between Mobius and Loki could even be seen as just friendship anymore. 

He also didn’t even have to think about why no one new of their maybe relationship, Mobius was part of the football team, he still remembered what rumors had spread about Steve a year before, with the whole, him breaking up with Peggy, unarguably one of the prettiest girls in that year (even Jane agreed with him on that one), because he had come out to her as gay. Obviously those were only rumors and by the time they had spread far enough to everyone who was at their school, Steve was long gone. That hadn’t stopped the people on their team from talking about it, and the things they had said had been anything but supportive and nice. Not often had he heard the conversations, because he usually said something against their behavior and the teammates listened to him enough to shut it when he said so; but the insults and downright violent things they had said still hung in the air afterwards, so much so that he wished for no gay person to be on their team, because it was probably safer to stay away from these bigots at all costs. 

When it came to Loki, he wasn’t surprised that if the two were in fact together, he hadn’t said anything. Of course, their mother was supportive and everything, but even she didn’t dare say that in front of their father. Odin was not on page with anything that had something to do with liberal views and more than once some slurs had fallen during a heated discussion over dinner. So, no matter if Loki was in a relationship or not, he knew that outing himself in front of Odin would be the equivalent of a death sentence. He didn’t even want to know what his fathers reaction would be, he would, no questions asked, defend Loki, he knew how sometimes Loki would go all quiet when someone, especially their father screamed at him and he didn’t just want to sit there and do nothing in case that ever happened. 

That night Thor went to bed with a lot of thoughts on his mind, most of them were gone by the morning, replaced with the determination to win the finale on saturday, pushing things like his brothers perhaps relationships to the very back of his mind.

When Loki woke up, his whole body ached, he looked at himself in the mirror of his bathroom and was met with an ugly sight, blue bruises everywhere, especially on places where his bones stuck out a little further than usual, making them more vulnerable to the violence the raven had suffered under. He hated looking like this, it made him look like a discarded canvas. He spotted the blue bruise on the bottom of his chin and when his fingers brushed against it, he remembered the painful punch he had gotten to it just the day before. 

His arms were still heavy, his wounds too severe for him to take off the bandages yet, but his skin itches with longing for more and he knew at this point his willpower wasn’t strong enough to refuse. So when he got ready for school, makeup on top of his visible bruises, there were some brand new bandages underneath his sleeves as well. 

The day was hot and by the end of the first two periods, Loki was already sweating underneath his hoodie. He goes to the bathroom again to splash some water into his face, this time the bathroom on the first floor, because that one is always packed and so Fandral and the others can’t do anything to him whilst he’s there. But, just as he’s leaning down to bring the water to his face, someone shoves him and he stumbles headfirst into the sink, his head landing underneath the water. He stands up hastily to look around who did it, but the person already left and he hears some snickers from the people around him as he tries to dry off his hair as efficiently as possible with the paper thin towels. He leaves the bathroom and heads to his usual spot underneath the stairs, sagging in on himself from the exhaustion he already feels this early on in the day, he doesn’t know how he’s supposed to survive the next four classes. 

By the time the school day ends for Loki, the raven isn’t entirely sure he actually survived and isn’t just a dead body walking around. In his third and fourth period, he had to once again watch Mobius sitting there, talking happily with Ravonna, who was sitting next to him; other than in the previous classes, Mobius does not glance at Loki, not one time and it makes him feel like he is just chasing some weird one sided hope that has already been abandoned by the other boy. It makes him feel like Mobius doesn’t think about his presence anymore, and even if Loki’s completely sure that the situation they are in at the moment is entirely his fault, and the fault of his heart deciding that Mobius should be the one the raven falls in love with, he had still foolishly hoped for the other boy to reciprocate at least some of that hope that their friendship could be rebuild; it didn’t feel like that anymore. He briefly thought about just calling the other boy, maybe telling him the whole truth and why he had acted the way he did, but he wasn’t sure that would fix anything at this point.

The next few days passed quickly, and if Loki came home with a few more bruises than he had had that morning because no one was there to stop them anymore, he just made sure no one saw them. 

On saturday, Thor was up early, excitement for the game buzzing through him and infecting everyone else around him, he even tried to get Loki to come and the younger boy reluctantly agreed, if only to watch a certain blond haired boy play. The evening air was surprisingly cool, so when Wanda and Pietro picked up Loki because he had convinced the two to come with him, it wasn’t entirely strange for him to wear a long sleeve jacket on top of a T-shirt. 

The drive to the school stadium wasn’t too long and the three of them held a nice conversation the whole ride there, laughing at jokes and betting on who would win the finale, all of them bet on Loki’s school. The stadium was already packet to the brim with people, a lot of them he recognized as students, but there were some other people too, students from neighbouring schools, obviously most of them from the opposing team and some parents too, Loki even thought he saw a few teachers sitting together somewhere in the crowd. 

The three of them found a nice spot to sit at from where they could all the the field pretty clear and when they had sat down, Pietro got some drinks and snacks from his backpack, handing Loki and his sister a soda before opening some crisps himself, to which he got an eye roll from his sister. 

The game starts off slow, not a lot happening, still, everyone is excited, the entire crowd cheering when the first goal is scored by none other than Thor and even Loki finds himself cheering along with the others. A few minutes later  the other team scores a goal and after a quarter, Loki finally sees Mobius switched in. He becomes painfully aware how good the blond looks, even with the ridiculous football get up. He’s grinning from ear to ear when he runs onto the field and the raven can see when his facial expression changes and he becomes more concentrated on the game. Loki watches Mobius for most of the game and when the break is on after twenty four minutes, their school is leading with two to one goals. In the second half, no one scores a goal for an entire quarter and when the opposing team catches up to them and makes a tie, their side of the crowd collectively groans. 

They don’t feel any better when five minutes before the end, Thor gets fouled and has to be carried off of the field on a stretcher with ice on his ankle. Loki is worried for his brother, immediately texting him and asking if he’s okay, his fingers hover over his and Mobius’s chat, maybe he should just text the other boy? Maybe Mobius would listen to him, but he once again tears his eyes away from his screen, looking back at the game. Following Thor’s foul, their team was given a direct kick and Loki watches in awe as Mobius scores the final goal, just before the timer runs out, getting them the win for the finale. Mobius has probably never felt more proud of himself, as his teammates come and cheer for him, lifting him up in the air. He feels like he’s on cloud seven and when he thinks he’s spotted a whiff of black hair in the crowd, he doesn’t go looking for it again; instead he focuses back on their victory. They all run over to the bench, here Thor is still sitting, a medic inspecting his ankle and bandaging it up. Thor is also cheering for them and gives Mobius a clap on the shoulder. 

‘Well done Mobius! I knew I wouldn’t regret putting you up on the lineup!!’ 

The blond boy grins and nodded smiling. 

A few minutes later they went back onto the field to receive the trophy, somehow they found a wheelchair for Thor, who accepted the trophy with a big grin and a massive cheer from the whole team and the crowd, accompanied by a big amount of confetti. 

When they were all done showering and were headed off to one of the teammates houses to celebrate their victory, Mobius’s phone binged.

Chapter Text

Mobius didn’t look at his phone until he arrived at Brock’s house. It was big and there were already a bunch of people from their team standing around the living room with red solo cups in hand. The blond boy ducked out of the way of some of them, making his way to the impressive bar just beside the door to the garden, which was also holding an entire built in swimming pool and he could also see a jacuzzi on the end. He had been over to Loki’s house often enough to know what rich people’s houses looked like, but in comparison to this, the Odinson's house was tame . 

This looked like one of those houses you saw in Mafia movies, he thought that the amount of money they had probably spent on unnecessary things in just the living room alone must be crazy. He laughed and shook his head once he got himself a beer, leaning on the bar as he fished his phone from his pocket, seeing a few messages. The first one’s he saw were from his dad, congratulating him on the win and also on scoring the winning goal. He also got a string of ‘don’t do drunk driving’ and ‘be careful’ messages. He smiled at these, a lot of people he knew from the team would have probably laughed at something like this and tossed them aside with nothing but an eyeroll; but Mobius just quickly answered his dad, telling him to have a good night and that he would probably be home late. 

The next message was from the group chat, also congratulating him on the victory, which he replied to with a string of thanks and emojis. 

His fingers hovered over the last message, it was from Loki, the text wasn’t long, so he could read the entire thing without opening it at all. ‘ Hey Mobius, I’m sorry, really.’ 

Mobius could feel his chest tightening and at the same time he felt a weird sense of bliss rush through him when he saw that the raven had texted him. Before he could say anything else, a banner appeared at the top of his screen, signalling another message from the other boy, it read. ‘ I saw you play today, congrats’. Mobius' mouth ran dry when he read that, Loki had seen him play? Loki had seen him score that goal? For some reason, his cheeks felt like they were on fire, and he could feel something stirring inside of him, something that he couldn’t place. Suddenly, it didn’t matter that his team was proud of him, it didn’t matter that his friends or his dad had congratulated him and that a lot of people had praised him for winning their school the championship, Loki saying he saw his goal and congratulating him was suddenly the most important fact in his head, his mind stirring and his knees felt weak all of a sudden. 

Nonetheless, the reminders of what had happened between him and Loki got pushed to the front of his brain and he switched his phone off without opening the messages, archiving the raven’s chat before putting his phone into his pocket and tipping the rest of the beer down his throat. Surely he was just confused, he needed a little distraction. He went over to the big couch, sitting down beside Thor, who had his foot up on the table, bandaged and with some ice on it. Their team captain had been driven to the hospital by his father almost immediately after the game, a worried Jane following him. Mobius knew what a scare that must have been, after all, Thor was applying to go to college for football and had even gotten a full scholarship a few months prior. ‘Hey Thor, how’s the ankle going?’ Mobius asked, feeling a little worried for the other boy himself. But in response Thor just grinned at him. 

‘Got lucky, it’s only slightly sprained and the doctor said I just have to rest it for like one and a half weeks and I’ll be good as new. I even still get to go to the ball, it would be a shame if Jane had to go on her own.’ Mobius nodded, he suddenly remembered Prom, which was also in less than two weeks. Their grade had decided to host the Prom on Friday, the last day before the summer holidays would start. He didn’t have a date yet and even though some of his friends like OB had already decided they would just be going alone and with friends, he wasn’t sure what to do yet. He thought about maybe asking Hunter to go with him, just as friends; if she didn’t have anyone yet either. He was pretty sure Ravonna and Sylvie would go together. Mobius had never been to a proper Prom, if he didn’t count the one he went to after middle school, but that could barely count. He was kind of excited and was looking forward to it. He didn’t know what exactly to expect, but he had always heard that Prom was a one time experience that he shouldn’t miss out on. A deep part of his brain hoped that Loki would be there with him, but he was already feeling a bit fuzzy and didn’t register that bit correctly. 

Suddenly, the couch dipped next to him slightly, and when he looked up, Jane had sat down next to Thor, Mobius greeted her. ‘Hey Jane.’ He smiled and she greeted him back. ‘Hey Mobius, great game today, you really are an amazing player.’ She grinned and Mobius nodded his head in thanks. He suddenly realized how many more people had arrived, most of them he had never seen before, but some he recognized from their school. ‘Hey Thor, who are all these people?’ Mobius asked Thor, who was currently saying something to his girlfriend. He looked up a bit surprised and looked around before answering Mobius. ‘Oh, these are just some people the other’s invited, they said they would like just the team here at first but would invite some more people over later, you can invite someone over too if you want to, Brock wouldn’t mind, I’m sure.’ He smiled and Mobius nodded. 

He quickly became aware of the fact that big parties were not his favourite space. Hell, even Thor, who was currently nursing a sprained ankle and couldn’t even walk or move without a wheelchair, doctors orders, was having a better time. Mobius just sat on the couch, cup still in his hand, he didn’t know how many beers he had had, he just hoped it wasn’t too many. 

When the couch dipped beside him once more, he expected it to be Thor, Jane or someone else he knew. Instead, there was a girl sitting next to him, he didn’t know her and assumed one of the other guy’s had invited her. ‘Hey, saw you sitting here all dopey, thought you could use some company.’ She smiled at him and Mobius had to make sure she was talking to him for a second. ‘Oh, uh- thanks, I mean, yeah, parties, not really my thing.’ He answered, not really in the mood for a conversation with a stranger at the moment, but he didn’t want to be rude to her either. ‘Really? I think you fit right in.’ She grinned and Mobius rolled his eyes, laughing at her statement.

Before he could say anything to that, she spoke up again. ‘Want to head outside for a bit, it’s a little less stuffy and crowded by the pool.’ The blond boy nodded and followed her through the massive glass doors outside into the garden behind the house. ‘I’m sorry, I completely forgot to introduce myself to you earlier, I’m Aesir, what about you?’ Mobius halted at the name for a second, for someone who lived in Texas it didn’t seem like a common name, but then again, neither was his.

‘I’m Mobius.’ He gave her a slight smile, not being able to ignore how her shoulder length black hair reminded him of someone who had been on his mind for already way too long this evening. 

The two of them held a nice conversation, eventually sitting down on a bench next to the jacuzzi together. Mobius tried to ignore the flirtatious innuendos Aesir brought up in their conversation every now and then, he wasn’t sure what she was playing at, it wasn’t like there weren’t any other, noticeably more attractive guys around. 

‘Mobius, you seem like a nice guy, you know?’ She asked, suddenly closer to him than she had been a moment before, it made the blond boy’s stomach turn but not in a good way, more of an anxiety kind of way. ‘That’s nice of you to say, you seem nice too.’ 

Mobius was caught off guard by the sudden hand on his cheek and even more confused, as Aesir pressed her lips to him, kissing him slightly. He didn’t want to embarrass her, so he played along for a second, unsure of what to do, he closed his eyes. 

They shot back open a second later, he hastily sprung up, leaving Aesir confused.

‘I’m sorry, Mobius, really, I didn't mean to overstep. Is everything all right?’ She asked, guilt and concern lacing her voice. ‘Yeah, I just, uhm, it’s getting late, I need to go.’ 

Without saying goodbye to anyone, he practically sprinted to his car, he knew he probably shouldn’t be driving, but he sat behind the steering wheel anyways and drove home as fast as the speed limits would allow him. 

Only when he was safe at home, lying on his bed, did it hit him. 

Oh

oh no

This couldn’t be. It should be impossible for him, Mobius couldn’t. He thought back to the kiss he had shared with Aesir. He hadn’t felt anything, not a single thing except for the sensation of her lips on his and to him it felt like nothing special. But when he had closed his eyes, images had flashed before his closed eyelids. Images of a certain someone kissing him, leaning in and touching his cheek like the girl in front of him was doing right at this second, and he had felt something. Even he wasn’t drunk enough to ignore what that feeling meant, but he wasn’t sure if he could live with what it would mean for him. 

He had always been good at shaking thoughts from his head, but this time the images seemed to be frozen in place, drilled to the front of his mind as if he wanted them to stay there. Loki’s black curls and green eyes and god, Mobius couldn’t stop thinking about kissing the other boy. 

He felt a strangled sob come out of him, and not even a minute later he was full on sobbing into his pillow. His eyes were already hurting, but he didn’t care. What was he thinking? He couldn’t think about Loki like that, he couldn’t think about a boy like that. 

He felt nauseous, not at the thoughts, but at the way they made him feel, the way his entire body seemed to prickle with electricity and he felt all fuzzy when thinking about it. 

Another broken sob left his mouth when he realized that this was in fact not a weird drunken thought and all of the previous moments between the two came back to him. 

The cuddling, sharing a bed, comforting each other, he realized now, that what he had felt in those moments were not platonic and friendly feelings, that those were feelings of affection.

The revelation didn’t make it any better, he had for some reason hoped, that his newfound attraction to the other boy might be just because of his looks, Loki had a feminine stature and face, maybe it was just a mistake, his brain somehow mistaking the raven for a girl, like Aesir, she was pretty. 

But deep down he knew that that was not the case, he knew that whatever this was, it wasn’t just a physical thing, and that made it even worse, because that would mean that Mobius was attracted to Loki, a man. That would mean he fell for a boy. 

After the game had ended, Loki, Wanda and Pietro had headed for a small ships stand and had stood by the side of the stadium together, talking and eating in peace. When they had dropped Loki off at home, the raven had texted Mobius, he was afraid of what the others response would be, but as the night went on, he never got a response. When he heard Thor and Jane come home from the party, very drunk to a point where Loki and Jane had to somehow carry Thor up the stairs and into his bed, he checked his phone another time, but the messages were still unread. Maybe Mobius just hadn’t checked his phone.

Maybe he didn’t want to talk to Loki. The thought rushed through his head; he had tried to ignore it, but he was starting to believe that maybe the blond boy just didn’t want any contact at all anymore, all the raven could do was agree with the other boy’s decision silently. 

His father came home late at night, no questions asked. He had probably spent the last few hours at the pub, boasting to all of his friends how great of a son Thor was. If anyone ever asked about his other son, he would brush him off and pretend he didn’t hear anything. Even amongst his friends it was an open secret how much Odin despised Loki, how he didn’t step in when anyone would poke jabs at the boy, even at family gatherings and how he himself would call his own son words and insults to anyone who cared to listen enough. 

Loki listened carefully to his fathers steps, he had hidden in his bathroom, not wanting more bruises added to the ones already caused by him and the guy’s from school. He breathed out with relief when the footsteps came to the end of the hallway and Odin disappeared into one of the rooms. Loki came out of the bathroom and hurried over to his bed. It was already past two in the morning, and he wasn’t sure he could even stay awake any longer. 

He fell asleep within minutes and when he woke up, the weight of still unanswered messages weighed down on him. 

Chapter Text

When Loki’s alarm sounded in the morning, he had been up for some time already. The voices of his parents waking him up in the early hours of the morning. They were once again arguing about something, what exactly it was he couldn’t make out but he was sure it wasn’t good. Normally, Frigga wouldn’t argue back this much, she would say something and they would have fights, but not like this. 

Thor wasn’t home either, Jane had driven him to the hospital this morning so they could pick up a special cast for his ankle and they had gone out afterwards. 

Slowly, Loki got up from his bed and laid his headphones to the side. He had been trying to drown out the arguing for the past half an hour, but the raven could still hear all of their shorts over the loud music in his ears. He checked his phone one last time, his messages to Mobius still unread; he sighed and laid it to the side, trying to drown out the stinging in his chest. He knew it was his fault, but that didn’t make it any better. 

He walked over to his door and went into the hallway, from where he could only just hear the front door slam shut. He assumed his father had gone out drinking after their fight, so he almost shrieked when Odin came walking up the stairs, evidently angry and practically fuming when he caught a glimpse of his younger son. 

Loki felt the air leave his lungs with the fear he was feeling, nonetheless he tried to ignore the man walking towards him and he turned around and walked into his room, shutting the door. A few seconds later however it was opened, the hinges shaking with the way Odin had slammed it open. Loki flinched hard and turned around, scared and with his fingered shaking slightly. ‘What were you thinking, Loki?’ His father asked, obviously still angry at him, but his question just made the raven more confused, what was his father talking about? 

‘I don’t know what you mean, I swear I don’t!’ He tried to argue back, hoping that it would maybe calm down Odin. But it only made the man look angrier with him. ‘Don’t know what I’m talking about? Boy, what were you thinking asking your mother to send you to a therapist?!’ And suddenly, Loki remembered. With everything going on in the past few day’s he had almost forgotten that he had asked his mother to maybe get Odin to agree to get him one. He had been more determined at that point too, wanting to get better for himself, for Mobius, for his friends.
Now though, he wasn’t so sure anymore, he didn’t know why, but he didn’t feel the same kind of determination like he did back then; he didn’t feel like getting better anymore. He slowly looked back up to his father. ‘I’m sorry I asked, I don’t want one anymore.’ Odin just snarled at him, still angry, but looking somewhat satisfied; Loki was sure that was just because he wouldn’t have to tell his friends that his disappointment of a son was now also mentally ill and seeing a therapist. 

‘You better not want one anymore boy, you’re enough of a sissy already.’ The statement made Loki’s blood boil as he looked back up to his father, resolve crumbling away as he snapped back at the man. ‘Less of a sissy than you are, at least I admit I have problems.’

Before he knew it he was gripped by the front of his pyjama shirt and yanked towards his father. ‘What the fuck do you mean by that.’ He spat and Loki could see the way his neck was turning red. ‘What do I mean by that? You treat your kid like shit the whole time, you beat me up if you feel like it, you don’t do that if you’re a father!’ Loki could feel the pain in his cheek before he even registered the punch properly, his face went numb and he fell to the ground when another fist hit him in the stomach, knocking all of the air out of him. 

The tears came soon after, his eyes burning as they flooded down his face. 

When Odin seemed to have calmed down enough, he left Loki’s room, the raven still bleeding all over the carpeted floor,trying to hold his nose so no more blood would drip onto it. The tears on his face had dried and he was nothing more than a sniffing mess. A few days ago he would have called Mobius, would have driven around with him, maybe go stargazing again, but that was in the past now; maybe Loki should move on. Judging by the messages that the blond boy still hadn’t opened, Mobius had moved on and didn’t seem to even think about Loki anymore. 

It hurt him but he knew it was Mobius’s right to do so, Loki had lied to him and been a horrible friend, even if they hadn’t had the fight, Mobius would have left as soon as he would have found out that Loki harboured feelings for him, he was sure of it. When the bleeding stopped, he went and laid back down in his bed, unsure of what to do. Maybe he should text Mobius one last time, he wasn’t worth the blond boy’s time, but he wanted to at least have a clean cut.

He opened his phone and went onto his and Mobius’s chat, his fingers shaking slightly as he did so and he almost dropped his phone onto his face, which was still covered in blood. Their last few messages were still unread, the grey arrows haunting him in a way he didn’t think was possible. He typed out a message, it was short and he didn’t know if it made sense or if Mobius would even read it, probably not, but he sent it off anyways. He stared at it for too long and thought about deleting it anyways, but he decided against it and just shut off his phone without thinking about it a second time; he knew he would regret it.

Then he turned over on his bed, not caring about the dry blood that was slowly crumbling off of his face, the small flakes landing all over his pillow sheets. Loki hugged one of his many pillows as he felt the tears recurface. He might want to make himself believe that he could do this without the other boy, but his life had been so much better, not perfect in a long shot, but he had something to live for and something to look forward to; Mobius, Sylvie, Hunter, Casey, OB, Ravonna. It had been fun, it had made him happy, but nothing good seemed to last for him anyways, he should have known that from the start it wasn’t meant to last, at least not for him. 

He hoped that Mobius would get everything he wished for. Maybe a nice girlfriend, a cool friend group and a perfect life. He could picture Mobius, living in a family house, maybe with children, definitely with jet skis, somewhere not too crowded, he would have a perfect life, at least that’s what Loki wished for him, no matter what happened between them, he didn’t think he could ever bring himself to hate the other boy, he would never wish anything but a perfect and happy and easy life for the other. 

Even though he had just woken up a bit ago, he fell back asleep, exhausted and tired. And when his mother came home again, having gotten the ingredients for Loki’s favourite pastry to bear to him why she and Odin had fought, she only found him sound asleep. With the lights out in Loki’s room and the blinds down however, she completely missed the big bruise forming on her son's cheek. So when she checked on him, she just smiled at his seemingly peaceful complexion and let him sleep for a bit longer. She knew how bad he had been sleeping for the past few days and he probably needed this. Frigga closed the door quietly and went back down into the kitchen to continue baking. 

Mobius hadn’t expected to get another message from Loki; in truth, he hadn’t thought he would ever hear from him again. Following his revelation from the night before, he hadn’t woken up in a peaceful state. Now that his mind seemed to have gotten behind the fact that Mobius did like the raven in a very much not platonic way, he couldn’t seem to get the image of Loki kissing him and vice versa out of his head. It still seemed stuck in his brain when he woke up, following him from his dreams and he had almost started crying when he woke up. 

He still didn’t know how to handle it. Part of him hoped it would just go away, but it wouldn’t and he knew. He had gotten on his phone first thing in the morning and had looked up if there was a way to get rid of feelings but the only things he found were people telling him to go and date or keep a distance from the friendship, which he was already doing. 

And he was very surely not about to date someone to get over someone else. It still made him feel sick, he felt wounded and his swollen eyes still reminded him of the things he had felt before. His dad had never outright been homophobic, but he was very surely not a liberal, at least, not to Mobius’s knowledge and he didn’t exactly think that other people who were gay, trans or anything different in the community were sick or disgusting. He supported them even, but picturing himself with them, picturing himself with Loki made him feel good and at the same time so so disgusting and vile and downright morbid. 

It made his throat clog up and his breath hitch and he wanted to throw up even if he didn’t actually feel sick. It didn’t feel fair of him, didn’t feel fair of him to anyone who was actually gay or something else, he didn’t want to feel like this about these feelings, didn’t want to be disgusted by them, but he also didn’t want to have a thing for Loki or any other guy; Mobius didn’t want that option, he didn’t want that possibility. 

Ever sice he was a kid he had dreamed of his perfect life, a wife, maybe some kids. Nothing special, just a nice and calm life, but that was all crumbling down around him and he didn’t know how to stop it. What if he could never live that life, worse even, what if it wouldn’t actually make him happy? What if he had spent years dreaming of this perfect life, only for him to find out he wouldn’t be able to be happy whilst living it, that it would be a lie. He tried to tell himself that that wouldn’t be the case. He had liked girls before, maybe he could like both? Was that even possible? 

To him it had always been one or the other, nothing in between. He grabbed his phone again, shakily typing in his passcode and going to the search bar. With still shaky fingers, he typed in a ‘ can I like both boys and girls?’ He was met by a surprising amount of results, he was confused at first, but as he read through them, he felt as if something had been lifted off of his shoulders. Bisexuality, it had been called. He felt seen and at the same time relieved, for one, it was normal and possible to like both, and on the other hand that meant that he could move on from this, fall in love with a girl one day and live the life he always dreamed of. It meant that this weird, hopefully short term, attraction wouldn’t last forever and he could grow up to be just as he had always hoped. 

He would be able to make his father proud, have children and a loving wife. He felt a bit more relieved. But then something caught his eye. He had almost forgotten the message he had gotten from Loki; before he could even think his actions through, he tapped on the banner, opening their chat and Mobius mentally hit himself for making that mistake. But he decided that it was too late now anyways and he should just read it. 

‘I’m sorry for reaching out even though you probably don’t want me to, I won’t do it again.’

Something inside of Mobius screamed at him, was telling him to just god damn answer Loki and tell him to come over, but the guilt that came with that was too much for him and he reasoned, that he had to forgive Loki first before he gave the raven a second chance, and he wasn’t ready to do that yet. He clicked off of their chat and closed his phone, putting it to the side. Even though his whole discovery hadn’t been an exact joy for him, it was a bit easier now that he knew it was possible for him to still lead a normal life. 

He continued with his day as normal, got up and had breakfast, and in the evening when he met up with the others he was a bit quieter and didn’t say much, no one noticed it; even though Sylvie gave him a look that he couldn’t escape. He wanted to say something, tell her, or rather he knew that she wanted him to tell her, but he wasn’t ready for that yet himself, he needed to figure some stuff out himself first and he wasn’t exactly sure how long that would take.

Chapter Text

The last week of school started and it wasn’t a great time for Loki. On Monday morning, when he went to check his phone, he saw that Mobius had in fact finally read his messages, but hadn’t replied; that only confirmed the raven’s thoughts, that the blond boy no longer wanted any contact with him. He had cried for a few minutes before getting ready and trying to go on with his day as usual. 

The bus ride wasn’t any better either, loud kids excited for the last five days of school before the summer holidays started mixed together with the school's generally buzzing mood from winning the finale on Saturday made for very loud halls and it became quite overwhelming.

When Loki dragged himself into Physics class, Mobius didn’t seem to be there yet, so he sat down at his usual seat and dug out his phone, switching on the camera to look at his face. 

Odin had made quite a mess of it, a massive black and blue bruise covering his right cheek and jaw. Luckily, he had gotten good enough with makeup to conceal it enough, he just hoped it would last the entire day. Soon after, more students arrived and when he looked up, he saw Mobius enter the room. The blond boy’s eyes flickered to him momentarily and Loki couldn’t help but feel a stinging inside of his chest. 

The first two periods felt like they went on for hours, and more than once did Loki think he felt a pair of eyes on him, but every time he looked over at Mobius, the boy would not be looking his way, or be talking with the person next to him. 

When the bell finally rang and everyone filtered out of the classroom, Loki only got one last glance at Mobius before the other boy left the room and headed to god knows where. 

The raven walked through the halls, heading for his sport underneath the stars, but when he got there, the only thing on his mind was when he and Mobius had shared a heart to heart right here and so he didn’t feel like staying, instead he walked up to the library, choosing a nice small table and digging out a book which he had bought from home out of his bag. For the most part of the break he was left undisturbed, but that changed, when someone knocked the book out of his hands. He looked up, only to see Hogun staring down at him, a snarl on his face as Loki felt anger slowly boil up underneath his skin. 

‘What do you want?’ He asked, suddenly becoming all too aware of the fact that the table he had been sitting at was placed in the far corner of the library, barely anyone being around him. ‘Oh, nothing.’ Hogun said, Loki scoffed, he knew he probably should act more to keep himself safer, but he just rolled his eyes at the other boy and went to pick up his book which was still lying a few feet away.

Before he could actually pick it up, he felt a hit on his back, his entire body tingling with pain as it spread from where Hogun had hit him. He stood up and turned around, trying to keep the tears from his eyes. ‘What, this is my last week at this school, I should make the most of it.’ The older boy stated, disgust and disdain building up in Loki’s gut. He couldn’t stand Hogun, he couldn’t stand Fandral or Volstagg either or anyone who had made fun of him; but for some reason whenever he had the chance to stand up for himself, he couldn’t take it. 

He always felt disappointed in himself afterwards, but when he was actually in the situation, his fear got the better of him and he wouldn’t be able to speak against them like he wanted to. So when Hogun finally left Loki hurting all over and tears streaming down his face, he couldn’t find it in himself to resent the other boy, he only blamed himself for not doing anything against him. He understood why they acted towards him in the way they did, he was an easy target to trample all over and maybe he deserved the way they were treating him. 

He sighed and went to go to his next class, just being glad that most of the places Hogan had hit him were not visible over his clothing. When he got to the Art’s room he relaxed, ready to finally have a few hours of peace and quiet without anybody annoying or picking on him. 

For Mobius, the day seemed to go by fast, except those two first periods of Physics. He couldn’t stop looking at Loki all the time, averting his gaze as soon as Loki seemed to pick up on his staring. It wasn’t like he was feeling all too much better about the situation, but the raven didn’t seem to be feeling any better. Mobius was sure Loki had meant when he texted the ‘I’m sorry’ Mobius just wasn’t entirely sure he would mean it too.

But now that he knew about his feelings, he couldn’t seem to look away, his eyes being pulled towards the other boy like a magnet and he couldn’t do anything to stop it either. He still felt guilty, still felt like it wasn’t correct of him to feel this way, but he couldn’t exactly change that for the time being and he had accepted that he would just have to live with it. 

By the time the school day was over, Mobius was almost a hundred percent sure that Sylvie knew that something was going on with him. He knew that not even talking to her one word was weird, and by the end of fourth period, even OB and Casey had caught on that something was going on with him. Sure every now and then he would have a more quiet day, but he was also looking over to the doors of the cafeteria, a big part, actually most of him wished for Loki to just walk through those doors and force Mobius to talk to him, Mobius knew that right now he wouldn’t be ready to start a conversation with Loki, but he also didn’t think he would refuse the other boy if he just asked. Obviously, the more sensible part of him was telling him that speaking to Loki would in fact not be a good idea, but he decided to mostly ignore that. 

When they were headed out of their last class, Sylvie caught up to Mobius in the hallway, grabbing him by the shoulder and turning him around. Mobius gasped in shock when she did so, but relaxed once he saw who it was. ‘Hey Sylvie, don’t scare me like that, Jesus.’ He breathed out as the two of them went to the side of the hall, as to not be completely trampled by the dozens of other students. ‘Sorry, I didn't know if I’d catch you at any other moment today, I just wanted to ask if everything's okay, you seemed kinda off earlier and I wasn’t sure you wanted me to bring it up in front of the other’s.’ 

She gave him a reassuring smile, and Mobius gave her a weary one back. He knew he could trust her, but he himself wasn’t entirely sure yet and he didn’t know if he wanted to tell her ahead of time. He still didn’t feel at home with possibly liking people of the same gender, didn’t feel comfortable even thinking about it, but he hoped it would get better, maybe he could tell her soon though. 

He gave her a small nod. ‘Yeah, thanks for thinking about that, but I’m pretty sure they also noticed. I don’t know, things have been all over the place the past few days and I need to sort some stuff out, I’ll tell you when I’m ready though, okay?’ He asked and Sylvie gave him a nod. ‘Sure, don’t worry about it, whatever it is, I’m sure you’ll get through it, but always feel free to talk to me okay?’ As Mobius watched Sylvie walk away, he briefly wondered if he should have reacted the same way to Loki as Sylvie had done to him just now. Maybe he had been too harsh, maybe the raven wasn’t completely at fault at all. 

Mobius wasn’t ready just now to tell Sylvie and she had respected that, maybe Loki hadn’t been ready to tell him whatever he was hiding and Mobius had practically forced him to either tell him or break off their friendship.

It made him sick just thinking about how Loki must feel if that had been the case, but after all, Loki had lied to him and apparently even some of the other’s; Mobius suspected it was Sylvie, knew about what he was hiding. What was so secretive that Loki could tell Sylvie, but not Mobius, who had been his closest friend? Loki and Sylvie hadn’t even known each other for nearly half as long and they had only met a few times if you left out the breaks in school. Mobius felt a weird sense of betrayal following that line of thought. Loki had trusted a girl he barely even knew over the guy who had undoubtedly helped him through some tough times the most out of all of them. 

Mobius felt like he had a right to still be mad at Loki, even if he had just realized that maybe he hadn’t treated the other boy completely fairly. 

When Tuesday rolled around, Sylvie was almost certain that whatever had happened with Mobius had to do with Loki. She decided to somewhat keep an eye open for the raven, spotting him sometimes between classes. She barely however saw him in the breaks, he never seemed to go to the cafeteria anymore, and she completely understood why.

Of course, she probably knew more about both sides than even Loki and Mobius did, but she still didn’t feel like it was her place. But Sylvie had already made up her mind that if Mobius would ever bring it up again, or would be up to talk about the situation again, she would tell him to talk to Loki. It had been weird at first, not having Loki around for the breaks, he had never talked that much, but they all kind of seemed to miss him, Mobius the most. Sylvie had explained the situation to the other’s once they asked. Always saying that Loki hadn’t been truthful to Mobius and that had made the blond boy upset, so they weren’t exactly on speaking terms anymore. 

On their second break on Tuesday, she had been a little late, her teacher having made her for some reason wipe the chalk off of the black board, which then again took an unnecessary amount of time. By the time she was out of the classroom, it was already well past ten minutes into the break and she was just considering going to her next class already instead of even taking the walk to the cafeteria. She went to the bathrooms, not waiting to be caught still within the normal building during break, but when she passed the boy’s bathroom, the door suddenly swung open, almost hitting her in the head. She scoffed as a blond and black haired boy came out of the room. ‘Be a little more careful next time.’ One of the boys rolled his eyes at her, but they didn’t seem really interested in talking any more to her, as they walked off pretty quickly. 

The door to the boy’s bathroom was still open when she continued walking and she thought she heard a sniffing coming from inside. She snapped her head around and was met with a crying Loki, standing in front of a mirror and working a concealer on his face. Without a second thought, Sylvie entered the bathroom and turned Loki by his shoulder, much like she had done earlier with Mobius. Loki seemed shocked at first, almost frightened and that look didn’t seem to leave him when he saw who it was, there was only panic added to it and Sylvie quickly saw why. 

On the raven’s right cheek there was a big bruise, it was a deep blue, but was already turning yellow on the edges; more alarming was his nose, which sported a big bruise on the bridge and had seemed to be bleeding until a few moments ago, dried blood still visible on his cupid’s bow. Loki tried to turn away from Sylvie's grasp, but she didn’t seem to let him budge even a tiny bit. 

‘Loki, be honest, who did this, was it the two guys just now?’ She asked, even though she was already quite sure she knew the answer. Sylvie had only seen them for a few seconds, but she was pretty sure it was the same guy’s who had bullied Loki just a few months ago. She had thought they had stopped, but that obviously didn’t seem to be the case.

Loki knew he couldn’t lie to Sylvie, he was pretty sure she already knew and just wanted to hear him say it, so he nodded, more tears escaping his eyes as she gave him a short hug. 

‘Loki I’m sorry, I thought they stopped, I really did. How long has this been going on for again?’ Loki thought about it for a second before answering her. ‘Not long, since uhm, since Mobius and I-’ He got cut off by his own tears, but both him and Sylvie knew what he had meant. Sylvie wasn’t entirely sure how to answer that, but she handed him a paper towel for his tears, which he gladly accepted and started dabbing at his eyes. 

‘Look, Loki, I know what happened, and I gotta say, I understand Mobius, but he isn’t a bad person and he will give you a second chance Loki, I know.’ Loki didn’t feel empowered by the words, he wasn’t sure if he wanted a second chance with Mobius, what if his feelings would get in the way yet again. 

‘I know,’ he said, his voice weaker than he wanted it to sound. ‘I’m not sure he should give me one though.’ His head was lowered, he didn’t dare look Sylvie in the eye. 

‘Why not Loki, he won’t hate you, you know, he’s upset right now, but he won’t be forever, he misses you too.’ The words stung in Loki’s chest and an unwanted feeling of hope spread behind his ribs. He took a deep breath before speaking again. 

‘He shouldn’t, Sylvie, not when I feel like this about him, not when I can’t see him as a friend.’

Chapter Text

The news wasn’t new to Sylvie, she had been sure about Loki’s feelings ever since the first time she had met him during their picnic; even though the raven had denied them at that point. She sighed, she had hoped for Loki that he could get over Mobius, that this whole fight wasn’t simply caused by Loki being afraid of admitting his feelings, but it didn’t look that way.

‘Look, Loki, you can still be his friend, but if you don’t tell him if he ever gives you another chance, which I’m very sure he will, then I don’t think he’ll want to be yours again. If you chose to not be his friend because it’s not good for you, that’s also completely fine, but I think you should tell him why at least, tell him why you don’t want to be his friend anymore. Otherwise I think it’ll be worse for the both of you, you’ll just drown in self pity and Mobius won’t even understand why you broke off your friendship.’ 

She finished the sentence, and Loki seemed to realize something. He nodded and slowly looked back up at Sylvie. ‘Yeah, I know, could you tell him he can talk to me if he wants too? Only when he’s ready to do so, but I don’t think he'll listen to what I have to say at the moment.’ Loki lowered his gaze once more, and Sylvie understood him completely. She knew that it was probably really hard for Loki in this situation and that he wouldn’t be too motivated to reach out to the other boy if he wasn’t even sure Mobius would answer him. 

Her mind wandered shortly and got snapped back when Loki started applying his concealer again. The action suddenly brought her thoughts back to why she had originally found Loki and why she was currently standing in the boy’s bathroom at school. 

‘Hey, Loki, you should really get that reported you know? I don’t think anyone wants people like them at our school, I’m sure the school council would agree, and the teachers too.’ Loki just shook his head, something Sylvie didn’t understand at all. Why wouldn’t he report them to the school, he had proof right there on his face, why would he choose to do something against them? ‘I think more people at this school would rather not have people like me here, Sylvie. How they treated me wasn’t exactly a secret, anyone who wanted to drag me across the floor could and still no one ever did anything against it.’ Loki just put the concealer in his backpack and went to leave the bathroom, Sylvie stopped him. 

‘Loki you can’t just let them trample over you like this, don’t you understand that?’ Sylvie couldn’t pin point Loki’s facial expression, his face seemed blank, yet, when he spoke there was an unspoken emptiness and sadness that lingered and dripped off of his voice.

‘They’ll be gone next year anyway, Sylvie, I don’t need to make such a scene for only one remaining week.’ And with that, he left, leaving Sylvie completely baffled, how would someone be okay with being treated like this? She didn’t understand how someone would pass up an opportunity to get rid of such hateful people from an environment like this, no matter how little time they would still spend here.

The school bell made her jump slightly, as she remembered what room she was currently still in. She quickly went onto the hall, glad that no one saw her exit the boys bathroom; but Loki was already gone and she had no clue as to where he went. But she was going to make sure Mobius knew to reach out to Loki if he ever felt like it, maybe Mobius would actually talk to the raven again, they had so much to figure out and talk out. 

After school, they all went and met up at Hunter’s place, as they were sitting in the garden, eating some watermelon and drinking some soda, Ravonna asked into the group. ‘Have you all gotten your Prom tickets yet?’ All of them agreed collectively, nodding their heads. Mobius and Hunter had decided to go together, just as friends of course, but Mobius hadn’t wanted to go alone and since Casey and OB were also going together as friends it was fine. 

‘Oh my god, I have this really cool suit, it actually used to be my mom’s,’ Ravonna started, and soon after they all took turns in describing their Prom outfits. Ravonna was going to go in a nice orange suit, Sylvie had gotten a deep green dress with golden accents, she even had some photos to show the others. Mobius had to admit, it suited her really well, it made him think about what Loki would wear to Prom, even though he didn’t think the other boy would show up.

That didn’t stop him from imagining Loki in fancy clothes, maybe a green tailcoat with a waistcoat underneath? He could picture Loki well in one of those Vintage dress shirts with ruffles on the chest. The thought of them dancing together made him blush and he almost missed when Hunter showed them her gorgeous yellow dress paired with some golden jewelry and a head cover that was equally as golden. When it came to Casey, OB and Mobius, there wasn’t much to say, they had all opted for a plain black suit, even though Mobius had chosen a golden ornament, just to match with Hunter. 

After they were done discussing their outfits, they went back inside and sat down on the couch, turning the ac down to about fifteen degrees. Even though the garden was mostly overshadowed by the house, it had become unbearably hot outside over the last few days and none of them felt like sitting in that heat for any longer. 

Once everyone got comfortable on the big couch and chairs, they watched a few shows, but Mobius wasn’t paying much attention, his mind kept wandering back to Loki in his imaginary Prom outfit and he couldn’t stop himself from picturing the two of them dancing together amidst all of the other couples; loud music overflowing their senses and maybe a little more than just fruit juice in their systems. He wasn’t entirely sure himself yet, but when he had realized that maybe he should have reacted differently to Loki during their fight, the thought of forgiving him had also gotten a lot easier, he had even pictured himself apologizing to the raven. There was still the issue of how he was supposed to deal with his feelings, he wasn’t yet sure how he would handle those. But he thought it was probably more important to tell his friends first, he knew none of them had a problem with people liking someone of the same gender, multiple of them were in the community. 

When he had first found out what bisexuality was, he had secretly been very glad that the people he hung around where who they were and that he hadn’t chosen to be close to the people he knew from football; it made everything a lot easier. 

He had thought about maybe telling them on Prom night, until then he would have a few more nights to think about it and maybe plan what to say; the thought of actually telling them seemed much more scary than he had seen in all of the videos and movies he had secretly watched at night. They were just on episode three of whatever show they had been watching, the blond hadn’t paid much attention to it, when Sylvie tapped him on the shoulder. 

She had scooted over from her place at Ravonnas side and was looking at  Mobius in a serious manner. ‘Yeah, what is it?’ He asked, looking at her and away from the screen. 

‘I talked to Loki earlier, he said you could talk to him if you ever felt ready to give him another chance, he’d try talking to you properly this time.’ 

Mobius' chest felt light as he heard her words and nodded at her, a smile dancing across his features. ‘Yeah, I’m gonna try, give me a few day’s alright?’ Sylvie just shrugged. ‘I’m not telling you when to talk to him, or even if you want to talk to him, everything at your own time.’ 

Mobius felt comforted by those words, and even as Sylvie moved back to her usual spot, the smile was still visible on his face, not leaving it and for the first time in days reaching his eyes completely; Sylvie felt a wave of happiness brush over herself when she saw. Maybe they could work it out, she wasn’t exactly sure what to do about Loki’s bullies, but she was thinking of going to the principal, contrary to Loki’s wishes, she couldn’t stand them getting away with ruining a person's entire school time and mentally probably way beyond. Sylvie wasn’t sure how much they could do against them at this point, she just didn’t want it to happen again at this extent, even if Loki had said that a lot of people joined in, there were plenty of people who hadn’t even known that he got bullied and she was sure there were also plenty of students who wouldn’t agree with the bullies.

Unfortunately, it being two days before the summer holidays started, their headmaster didn’t seem to have any time for anyone, so her knocks went unanswered, which frustrated her to no end and when he vented her frustration to Ravonna later on the same day, the other girl suggested that she could perhaps start a club of sorts, to help people speak up against bullying and other things. Sylvie had smiled up at her and had immediately written down the idea. With Ravonna being in the student council already, it would make it a lot easier to get the idea approved by the others and maybe that could help other people in the future. 

Thursday wasn’t fun for Loki, he woke up and his entire body ached, when he went to the bathroom and saw himself in the mirror, he wanted to just cry and lie back down, maybe never get up again, his life had turned into nothing in the matter of a week and it was all his fault. He put on his makeup, making sure that none of his previous bruising was visible underneath. His hair looked unkempt and he felt disappointment when he didn’t find it in himself to take proper care of it; his past self would be ashamed of him, but he just felt so goddamn tired all the time now. 

He walked through his room and momentarily wished he could just lie down in his bed and not go to school, but then his mother would ask why he was sick and would possibly even drag him to the doctors and that was the last thing he wanted, so he dragged himself to the bus. It was as loud as usual, and with only two days left of school, he understood why, the ending of the school year was the only thing he was looking forward to at the moment too, it was the only thing he had to look forward to for months; Mobius and the others were just a nice experience, probably the nicest thing he had had in years so he was just glad it was over before the end. 

He knew he was lying to himself, he could still feel the want in himself reaching out for Mobius, even if the other boy had already turned his back to Loki and wasn’t looking back, no matter how much Sylvie told him he was going to.

The morning wind was uncomfortably warm, and he already regretted wearing a long sleeve, the arms uncomfortably rubbing against the bandages and the gauze, but he couldn’t exactly walk around without long sleeves, he had only been able to do that around the others, around Mobius. 

He felt his nose starting to hurt as tears slowly made their way into his eyes. As secretly as he could, he wiped them away before making his way to class. 

The day went by surprisingly peacefully, but the amount of times Loki had to watch people ask someone out to Prom was starting to get to him, shouldn’t people ask their date to senior Prom a little earlier than the day beforehand? 

It also made him think about the fact that their grade also had Prom on Friday; he wouldn’t be going, he hadn’t gotten anyone to go with and it was probably way too late to get any tickets now anyways, he would enjoy his last night, maybe bake something with his mother, take cheesy photos of Thor and Jane as they went off to have a fun night, maybe rewatch his favourite show or movie again, he hadn’t made an exact list yet, he just wanted to have some fun. 

Maybe he’d go stargazing one last time, he knew how to drive, he could just steal his mother’s car for one night, she wouldn’t mind, he was sure of it. 

But stargazing would remind him too much of Mobius, should he write him a note? 

Maybe he should prepare them today, so he would have more time tomorrow. He wondered what the blond would wear to Prom, Loki thought Mobius would probably look amazing in just about anything. He wondered who the blond was taking to dance, maybe one of the cheerleaders? 

As he fell into bed that night, he had a proper ‘To do’ list stashed away in his night drawer, together with a small pile of letters, one to Mobius, it was the longest too, one to his mother, one to Thor and one collectively written to Hunter, Sylvie, Casey, OB and Ravonna. 

He hadn’t been sure if he wanted to write one to Odin too, but decided against it in the end, realizing that he probably shouldn’t spend that much time thinking about him. 

His mind felt at ease for the first time in ages, he felt free and the thought of only having to get through one more full day made his head feel ecstatic. 

For the first time in what felt like ages, he fell asleep with a smile on his face, dreams lulling him asleep, dreams of blond hair and suits, disco balls and music.

Chapter Text

The entire school was in high spirits for the final day before the summer holidays; everyone seemed in a good mood, especially the seniors; who’d have their graduation ceremony later that day, followed up by senior prom, which everyone was already looking forward to.

Mobius wasn’t going to attend senior Prom, but he thought normal Prom was just as exciting, especially when he was going with his closest friends.
They had decided to go and meet up at Hunter's house again and would all get ready there together after school, maybe have some lunch together before that, but nothing else was planned as of now.
Mobius entered the Chemistry classroom, where he was already being greeted by Hunter and OB, who were huddled around their usual table, discussing something that the blond boy didn’t doubt was about buying alcohol. ‘Good morning.’ He grinned as he made his way over to his friends, somehow he felt lighter today, more at ease, maybe it was just the excitement from almost being free from school for six weeks. He sat down next to his two friends and they greeted him back. ‘Hey Mobius, are you excited yet?’ OB grinned and the blond boy nodded back at him.

‘Of course, I mean, who wouldn’t be excited about Prom and then six weeks off of school?’ Hunter laughed at that, and nodded in agreement. The rest of the class went by smoothly, them chatting about different things and making a list of food for the others to vote on later; they hadn’t been able to choose what they wanted to eat.

When the bell rang, Hunter and OB excused themselves from Mobius, saying they still had to return some books to the library before the holidays started. The blond boy had just laughed and nodded at the ridiculous sight of his friends trying and ultimately failing to carry a massive stack of books; how they had even gotten them to school was a miracle to him.

The halls seemed all the more crowded today, students eager to see some of their friends for the last time before the holidays, but it was also mostly seniors just taking a last stroll around the school, revelling in nostalgia. Mobius thought he’d caught a glimpse of shiny black hair somewhere ahead of him and he felt himself trying to get to the other person as quickly as he could, but before he could do so, he was knocked to the side by a senior student and he lost sight of Loki.
He’d been thinking about the other boy so much in the last few days; the thoughts of the previous night; Loki in a fancy suit and tailored vest had led him into a rabbit hole and he couldn’t seem to dig his way out of this one. He wasn’t sure when he should tell his friends, sure, they would very likely be supportive of him, but he wasn’t sure if he was ready to admit those feelings to himself.

It wasn’t at all about what the others knew about him, it was about what he accepted on himself. He knew he wanted to tell them, he knew now, that maybe his feelings for Loki weren’t all that bad, that maybe they were not a thing he had to look at as a one off thing; even though it wouldn’t amount to anything.

Mobius knew it would hurt, admitting his feelings, because that would also mean he would have to admit that Loki did in fact not like him in the same way Mobius did; but he was sure that a little bit of heartbreak wouldn’t mess up everything. He’d be over the other boy within weeks and then they could be friends again! Mobius felt himself smiling as he was able to think of the other boy as his friend again, it made him realize, that maybe they both had some apologizing to do and that in the long run, a little crush wasn’t everything and it wasn’t that big of a deal either.

Mobius shuffled from class to class that day, trying to catch another glimpse of Loki, but when he did, the other boy never looked too happy, even when Mobius wasn’t in his line of sight. He felt a sting in his chest when seeing Loki all sad like this; he wanted to make Loki realize just how special he really was and wanted to reach out for him, but something always made him hesitate.

After the last class ended, they all met up at the parking lot, the whole school was gradually filling out, and Mobius suddenly realized, that school had been the only way to really see Loki every other day, he wasn’t sure if the raven would appreciate if he just showed up at his house in the middle of summer. He felt happy, school was over, he managed to pass his exams and everything was looking good grade wise, but that was undermined, he wasn’t sure by what but there was a dull ache in his chest that just didn’t seem to go away.

Eventually drove to Hunter's house. The weather probably couldn’t have been better and once they arrived, Mobius got his suit out of his car and walked over to the front door together with the others.
‘Oh right, OB, Mobius and I made a list earlier of what we could have for lunch, I completely forgot to show you!’ Hunter said as they all filtered into the kitchen, putting their suits and dresses on the couch. ‘Oh great, I’m starving already, show me.’ Sylvie grinned and they all huddled around the list to discuss what would be the best option. Eventually they all settled on some wraps with salad, since no one was really up for something warm. Everyone started doing some work and a few minutes later they sat down around the table.

‘I can’t believe school’s already over!’ Casey said and everyone agreed, Mobius hadn’t been at this school for more than a few months, but even those had seemed to pass within what felt like minutes. His whole life had been turned upside down and he had found out stuff about himself he never knew. He was grateful for his friends and that he had found a connection so fast, he was also glad he had found Loki, even if their situation wasn’t ideal at this point, he had some of the most fun memories with the other boy.

Loki’s day hadn’t been all too exciting, school had passed quickly, but even that hadn’t been too motivational, he was just happy to get home. His body had been tingling with adrenalin ever since he stepped into his house, he wasn’t sure if it was fear or excitement, but he decided not to think about it any longer.
He had asked his mother the same morning if she wanted to bake something with him, and she had seemed to be overjoyed about her son asking her. When he had taken off his shoes and went into the kitchen, she was already waiting there, all of the ingredients stacked on the counter.

‘Hello darling, how was school?’ Frigga asked, giving him a welcome hug. Loki just shrugged. ‘It was alright, nothing special, but at least now school’s over for the summer.’ She smiled and nodded. They spent the next few hours baking cinnamon rolls together, Loki didn’t know when it was the last time he had this much fun inside of his own home. Frigga was also happy to see Loki have this much fun, she knew her son had been struggling, and when he had asked her if he could get a therapist, she had tried to convince Odin, but much to her concerns, her husband had reacted just how she thought he might.

When they were done baking, Loki convinced his mother to watch some show with him, and even though it really wasn’t her type of show, she still sat down with him and watched it.
When it was time for dinner, Loki had fallen asleep, his head resting on her shoulder. She didn’t want to wake him up, so she laid him down on a pillow and went to prepare food. A few minutes later, the doorbell rang, which also woke Loki up again. When Frigga went to open the door, Loki practically sprinted past her, camera in hand, and opened the door. Outside stood Thor and Jane, both dressed for Prom. Jane was wearing a beautiful red dress and whilst Thor was just wearing a black suit, he was wearing a tie in the same shade and also wore some equally as red rings.

Before either of them could process what was happening, Loki held the camera up and took a photo. ‘Oh god Loki, throw that away I look stupid.’ Jane grinned and Loki just shook his head, waiting for the polaroid to develop. ‘Nope, won’t do, but I can take some proper ones from you too.’ He said and a few minutes later, he had taken uncountable amounts of photos of the two; they both even had a polaroid now which they could put in their phone cases.
‘Thanks Loki.’ Thor said and went to hug their mother, who was overjoyed for her son. She had hoped that Loki would attend his year's Prom too, but he seemed to be more than happy at home like this and as long as he was happy, she wouldn’t mind at all.

‘Where’s father? Shouldn’t he be home by now?’ Frigga frowned. ‘No, I’m sorry, he had a business trip to go on, it was all really sudden and he had to leave this morning, I’m sorry he can’t be here right now.’ She didn’t miss the slight hurt in Thor’s eyes, but he seemed to get over it quite quickly and just nodded. ‘Shame, you two have a great night!’ He said and Jane and him left waving, heading for her car, which was currently parked on the front lawn.
Once they were out of sight, Frigga smiled to herself, she was so happy her son had a wonderful girlfriend like Jane, she was such a sweet girl and they both loved each other deeply. She didn’t know when the last time was that she felt like that about someone, not even her husband.

When Frigga went back into the kitchen, Loki was already sitting at the counter, chopping up some of the vegetables that they wanted to put into the salad for dinner. ‘Thanks sweetie.’ She said and walked over to the pin board, putting one of the many polaroid's of Thor and Jane onto it. Loki looked over at the polaroid, the ones he used were his last stack, but he wouldn’t need them anymore anyways. A few weeks ago he had bought them to use when he himself went to Prom, now they were at least used up for someone's Prom photos.
He sighed and went back to cutting the vegetables, he had dreamed of going to Prom with Mobius many times, had dreamed of dancing and twirling each other around, about how the other would look absolutely gorgeous in a suit and how no one would bother them.

He chuckled at the irony of it all, about how he thought Prom would be the night of his life a few weeks ago, and now it was his last one.
He knew he wouldn’t go without regrets, he would have some, he wished he could have told Mobius in person what he felt for him, but their situation at the moment didn’t allow for a confession like that and maybe writing it all in a letter was easier anyways. He would have wished to say goodbye to his brother one last time and maybe to just experience some more things. It was easy to realize he would have regrets, but he knew that at the end of the day everyone had some and those weren’t a reason to push his plan back further, today was the only option for him.

After dinner, Loki and his mother sat back down on the couch and played some games, Loki knew he was only really doing this for himself, but part of him realized that his mother probably also missed things like this and might have been feeling a little lonely lately anyways, Loki hadn’t been out of his room much whenever he was home, and due to Thor’s finals he barely had time to do anything other than study and practice for football.
He felt bad when he thought about how little time he had spent with his mother over the past couple of months, she wasn’t home often either, working full time meant she wasn’t always at home and the time window in which they could spend time was very small.

It made him happy thinking about how he might make a happy memory for his mother before she left, at least they had a fun evening and had enough time to still spend. Loki knew that Thor wouldn’t be home till tomorrow and his mother always went to bed earlier, so it wouldn’t be a thing he should worry about. The fact that his father wasn’t even home, made it even easier, but he didn’t exactly think Odin would do anything about Loki’s plan, even if he knew of it, he was sure of that. Outside, the sun was still over the horizon, the summer time of year preventing it from setting any sooner. He liked the view they had from their living room, he just hadn’t gotten to enjoy it all too much in the past few years. His mother and him spent hours playing cards, until the sun finally set and he said he was too tired and would go to bed. ‘Yeah, I think I’ll go to bed now too, it’s getting late.’ Frigga agreed and they both went upstairs. Loki opened the door to his room, but turned his head around and called out to the other side of the hall.

‘Good night!’ He felt a smile creep up his face when his mother replied. He closed the door to his room silently, going over and sitting down at his desk. Loki hadn’t thought that playing some card games with his mother would take so long, but they were both enjoying the company and just kept playing more and more rounds. He still wanted to finish the book he had been reading for the past week though, so he sat down at his desk and started reading, pages turning as he read more and more chapters. When he reached the last page, his clock had just turned to quarter past three, he sighed and closed the book and lied it shut on his desk, then walked over to his nights stand and dug out the letters, laying them down on his desk together with the list on it, everything crossed out, at least they would know he’d have done everything he knew was possible.

His feet felt lighter when he walked over to the bathroom that was attached to his bedroom and the metal clinking of the box didn’t seem to be as loud as usual either.

Chapter Text

The night wind was already a bit cooler by the time Mobius drove round to Hunter’s house to pick her up, he was glad though; his suit would have been way too warm otherwise. He rang the doorbell and waited a few seconds before she opened it, lifting up the long skirt of her dress so it wouldn’t drag across the floor. ‘Oh wow, you’re actually on time.’ She joked and Mobius sent a grin back at her. ‘But of course I am, I wouldn't be late for Prom now would I.’ 

The girl however gave him a raised eyebrow, to which he lightly hit her arm. ‘That was one time, OB is late way more often than I am!’ He exclaimed, but Hunter just shrugged. ‘Yeah, but OB is OB, he’s allowed to be late.’ 

That was when Hunter’s parents came in, Mobius had only ever met them once, but they seemed like nice people, though they didn’t seem to be home that often considering they were both doctors. They greeted Mobius friendly and then took some pictures of the two, which took what felt like hours. When they finally left for Prom and were in the car, Mobius breathed out.

‘Seriously, wasn’t one photo enough? My legs were starting to cramp.’ The blond boy complained, but Hunter just gave him a look. ‘Ask me, I have to go through that hell at every family gathering, and there are a lot more people than just you to take photos with.’ Mobius didn’t even want to imagine, they arrived at school a little early, and saw Sylvie and Ravonna already waiting by Sylvie’s car, sporting the outfits they had just showed each other a few days ago. ‘Hello everyone.’ Mobius greeted them and they turned around to face them, a smile spreading over both of their faces.

‘Hello, oh my god you both look amazing!’ Ravonna grinned and they exchanged compliments. A few minutes later OB and Casey arrived too and they all headed for the main hall. At the entrance there was someone collecting the tickets and taking the jackets, even though barely anyone had brought one due to the weather. 

The music was already quite loud, even if the hall itself wasn’t too full yet, but more people were arriving with the minute. Mobius and the others went to the side to sit at a table for now, more interested in the drinks and food than the dancing at this moment, but so seemed everyone else. 

‘You want to get some food or do that later?’ Casey asked and they all agreed to eat something first, this was going to go until one in the morning, so they would need to fuel themselves. Once everyone had gotten something to eat, they all sat in comfortable silence, just throwing in a thing here or there. Gradually, more and more people came, and by the time it reached nine in the evening, the whole hall was crowded and stuffed with people, Mobius was just glad they had gotten a place to sit so early on, otherwise they would have to be standing somewhere on the side now and he couldn’t be bothered to do that. 

Suddenly, Hunter grabbed his hand and made him stand up, he looked at her confused for a second, before he realized that she probably wanted him to come along dancing, the others followed suit. It was more of a club dancing than ball dancing though, and they all found out pretty quickly. The music that was playing wasn’t exactly meant for a walz or a tango, so they all just ended up in their own circle, dancing around and singing out loud with the songs whilst having fun. Mobius had to admit that this was one of the most fun nights he had had in ages, the music was quite good and even with his friends it was more fun. 

When eventually a walz came on, Hunter decided to dance with Casey; which was all in favour of Mobius, because his legs were starting to hurt. Even though he was on the football team, legs had never been his strong suit, and especially not in these shoes, they weren’t exactly running shoes either. 

A few minutes later, Sylvie and Ravonna sat back down with him and OB, having just finished one song, but also deciding to sit out the next one. 

They all looked over at their other two friends, who were still spinning around on the dance floor. ‘Seriously, I don’t know where they learn to dance like that, all I ever learned was the walz and I only know that because I didn’t know if I would need it here or not.’ Sylvie exclaimed and the other’s nodded. Mobius himself wasn’t a great dancer, he had taken dancing lessons once, but only for formal events like weddings or something like that, Loki would probably be a good dancer though, his figure fit that of a professional one and he would look majestic whilst twirling around a dance floor like that; Mobius was sure. 

He had tried to not think about Loki for most of the afternoon, but every time someone with shoulder length black hair walked past, he would hurriedly steal a second glance, just in case he missed the raven. It never was him though. 

He tried to shake his thoughts by engaging in the conversation with the others more, talking to Sylvie, Ravonna and OB until Casey and Hunter finally returned from the dance floor. Sylvie got a round of fruit punch for everyone and tipped some vodka she had brought in a nice metal flask into OB, Hunter and Ravonna’s glass; the others still had to drive later. 

The music seemed to become louder by the minute, and Mobius was sure the majority of the students currently attending Prom were not sober anymore. He did go out to dance again, most of the time whenever one of his favourite songs would come on, otherwise he sat by their table, scanning the crowd for god knows what.

Apparently, God did know, Mobius himself knew, he just didn’t want to say it. He had planned to tell his friends about him being bi today, he just wasn’t sure how to yet, he had never practiced and never actually said it out loud before, he hadn’t been brave enough yet. He knew they were planning on going back to Hunter’s later that night, he would probably talk to them then, since he would rather tell them in a private setting than at Prom where everyone and anyone could overhear and spread rumors all over school within minutes. 

Before he knew it, one in the morning rolled around, everyone was buzzed and full of adrenalin, including Mobius. He was certain he hadn’t had any alcohol, but he still had the feeling of being far away from himself. He also thought he saw some people sleeping in chairs around the hall, he didn’t blame them though. 

The second he hit the night air, he woke up again, it was a lot fresher now, and even though it was summer, maybe he should have bought a coat. If not for him, then maybe for Hunter, who was currently walking around in a shoulderless dress. But when he looked over at her,s he didn’t seem to be bothered by the temperature at all, she did have a little bit more of the contents of Sylvie’s flask than he had had though. 

They got to his car and were soon on the way back to her house, the others following them. Once they arrived, Hunter unlocked the door and the all huddled inside, sitting down on the couch, the floor and at the kitchen counter. As soon as they were all seated, Hunter and Sylvie went to the pantry and got out some freshly cooled beers and a weird mix of orange juice and vodka, which Mobius wasn’t sure he was going to like but he let Sylvie pour some into his glass anyways. 

All of them were already a few bottles and glasses in, when they decided to get out Hunter’s switch and play some mario kart. Mobius wasn’t sure if Hunter’s parents were home at the moment, they had been earlier, but with the loud sounds of laughter coming from the living room, he was sure they would have said something by now if they were. 

They were on their third round of mario kart, Mobius currently taking a break; having given his controller over to Casey, when he thought about it. Now would technically be a good time to come out, they were all in high spirits. He hoped he would be brave enough. He felt his entire body being pumped full of adrenaline, his heart beating what felt like a hundred miles per hour and his fingers slightly trembled as they turned clammy. Mobius tried to say something, but he felt his throat clog up, fear taking over what he was going to say. He knew that they probably wouldn't react badly; all of them were at least accepting and ally’s, if not in the community himself. But telling them would also mean he would speak it out loudly, and that would make it true.

Because no matter how much he had gotten on terms with him liking boy’s, with him liking Loki, there was still a part of him that wanted so badly to just deny him feeling anything towards the same gender; wanted to deny him being able to feel something like this for Loki, that it was maybe all just a confusion, but he knew that wasn’t true, he had searched it up, he had read about it, he knew that that mindset most likely just came from his way of growing up and that hit could take ages to get rid of it. 

He looked over to his friends and saw that they had just finished one round, it would be now or never, his heart was practically in his throat. 

He cleared his throat before speaking up, making a few heads turn his way. ‘Uhm, guys I have something to tell you.’ He said, unable to contain the quiver in his voice, Sylvie turned off the volume of the TV, he was sure she already knew what he was about to say, she always did. ‘So uhm, I just wanted to say that I’m bi, I haven’t known for that long but I just wanted to let you know.’ There it was, spoken out loud and clear, for everyone in the room to hear. He simultaneously felt a weight drop from his heart and fear building up in his gut, afraid of what they would say. Maybe he had read them completely wrong and they were all total assholes who hated gay people and-

He was brought out of his spiral by a hug, it was Sylvie who hugged him first, but soon everyone joined in. Mobius felt relief wash over him like waves, and he felt safe, he felt like they could finally see who he was, he felt like he could finally see who he was and most importantly, it didn’t change anything. 

‘It’s really nice of you to tell us, I’m glad you felt like you could.’ Ravonna smiled and the others agreed with her, nodding along. ‘You wanna play the next round?’ OB asked and handed Mobius his controller, which he gladly accepted.

And just like that, everything was back to normal, nothing changed and no one saw him differently. They talked like they usually would and they laughed and joked like usual. He felt like the happiest person on earth, though, he would probably be even more happy if Loki would be here with him right now, Loki wasn’t all too much of a fan of social settings, Mobius had learned, but he always seemed to feel comfortable around Hunter, Sylvie, Ravonna, Casey and OB and Mobius just wished for Loki to be here again. 

He sighed at the thought, obviously, that wasn’t something he should be thinking about right now, especially when he knew that his feelings towards Loki were not the same ones the raven harboured for him. The clock on the top corner of the switch read almost three in the morning, when he went to sit down next to Sylvie, who was currently massaging Ravonnas back, who was sitting on the floor in front of the couch with a glass of water. 

They started talking about random stuff, and soon enough their conversation got to Mobius’s coming out. ‘Hey, Sylvie, you’ve known for like a while longer than I that you’re not straight, how’d you figure it out?’

He asked and Sylvie shrugged.
‘I guess I’ve always known I’m not into dudes, just never knew I was into girls until a few years back, had this massive crush on a friend of mine, didn’t exactly know what it was that I was feeling so when I did realize I was in fact having a crush on her, I stopped talking to her, realized too late that maybe I could’ve gotten over it but, you know, I was thirteen, wouldn’t have gotten anything but heartbreak had I stayed friends with her.’
Mobius nodded, he had realized he had feelings for Loki too, but that was after they had stopped talking, so he was in kind of a different situation than hers.

‘But now I’m curious, how’d you find out? I mean, I was already pretty sure I knew what you were going to say the second you opened your mouth back there, but it wasn’t exactly the thing I was betting on actually happening.’

She said. Mobius just chuckled and nodded, he knew what she meant, a lot of the guys he knew from football would rather swallow a flaming sword then say they were gay; even if they weren’t, so he could tell where she was coming from. He thought about telling her about his crush on Loki, but decided it couldn’t hurt, she had been in a similar situation before too and none of them were really still talking to Loki anyways. 

‘I uhm, at that party, after the football finals, I kind of kissed a girl, no, she kissed me, I didn’t enjoy it, but I closed my eyes and I just,’ He looked at his hands, not feeling brave enough to look her in the eye. ‘I closed my eyes for like a second and I imagined Loki and I just- god, I didn’t really know what to do with myself. Was pretty lost with my feelings and what was happening and all, I just have to get over this somehow and you know get it all sorted again.’

He finished and looked up at Sylvie, to his surprise, her mouth was wide open and she was staring right at him. ‘Are you being serious right now? Did I just hear you say that you imagined you kissing Loki and then liking it, did you just say that you have a crush on him?´

Mobius couldn’t place her tone and he wasn’t sure if she was furious with him about something or not, he looked back at her confused. ‘I’m sorry, did I do anything, is there a problem, I don’t understand?’ He asked and Sylvie stood up, dragging him by the wrist out into the garden; no one seemed to really care. 

‘Sylvie seriously, I thought you would know what I feel like, you’ve been in the same situation before, why are you mad at me now?’ Mobius asked furious, he was more confused though, but Sylie just shook her head. 

‘Mobius you didn’t do anything wrong, gods, this isn’t my place to tell you and I’m a bad friend for doing this but.’ She hesitated and raised an eyebrow wanting her to continue. She sucked in a big breath before continuing. 

‘Look, I’m a git for telling you this, but Loki stopped talking to you because he fell for you, in the not platonic way and I know I shouldn’t out people, it’s terrible, but I can’t see you two destroy what you had when it’s very fucking obviously mutual.’ 

Now it was Mobius’s turn to stare, and stare he did, his stomach was going god damn somersaults at the moment but all he could hear were Sylvie’s words echoing in his head. 

‘Loki stopped talking to you because he fell for you.’

He might actually be the happiest man on earth.

Chapter Text

Mobius felt like the luckiest man alive, on earth, even, he had thought about his feelings towards Loki about a million times, but in not one of those scenarios had his feelings been requited. It had always been an abbreviation of Loki being weird about it or just continuing to be friends with him. 

He stared at Sylvie for what felt like ages, before she shook him back into existence by his shoulders. ‘What are you looking like that for?’ She asked, clearly confused as to why the news she had just dropped on him had made such a big difference in Mobius. 

He almost jumped at her question; the first thing that came to his mind was that he needed to apologize to Loki, and quickly. He had definitely wronged the other boy, without even knowing his reasoning. He knew from some standpoint his side of the argument was also excusable, but he wasn’t sure he’d have told Loki about his feelings either, had he recognized of what nature they were before they stopped talking, so he didn’t blame the raven. 

‘I- shit, Sylvie, I need to go see him now.’ He slurred out, there was very little alcohol left in his system, he had just been drinking big amounts of water for the last hour, so he had pretty much sobered up again. Sylvie however just raised her eyebrow at him. ‘Are you sure he wants to see you at three in the morning?’

Mobius registered her words, but didn’t think about them too long, heading back inside and walking through the living room, practically sprinting, but Hunter’s questioning gaze held him up. ‘Where are you going?’ She asked, but he didn’t have the time for this right now, didn’t have time to explain it all to her again, his blood was pumped full of adrenalin and his mind was telling him to just go and talk to Loki as quickly as possible. 

Desperately, he looked over at Sylvie, who was just now coming inside through the door again. ‘Sylvie, I need to go, you can tell them everything, and Hunter, can I take one of these?’ He asked, pointing at a bouquet of red roses. Hunter nodded, still confused, but when Mobius walked towards his car, he didn’t really care to explain it to them in full detail right now; he was sure Sylvie could do it a lot better than he could as well, she seemed to have more overview on the situation anyways.

He started his car, fingers shaking from the excitement in his body, he felt so ecstatic he could actually scream right now, but he really didn’t want to be pulled over, so he didn’t. 

The mere twenty minutes that it took for him to get to Loki’s house already felt too long, it felt like he had been driving for hours and days on end without being able to reach his destiny. Mobius breathed out when he finally saw Loki’s house come up in the distance, and a minute later he was pulling up to the drive, not caring about parking, he did notice that two cars were missing, Thor didn’t seem to be home. 

The blond boy went to grab the rose from the passenger seat and his eyes glanced over to the clock on his dashboard, it read twenty past three in the morning. Maybe Sylvie had been right and he shouldn’t have come here this early, Loki hadn’t been at Prom, so he would have very likely gone to bed earlier than Mobius did. It was still worth a try.

He had drunk a lot of water, but a little alcohol still seemed to be in his system, because he couldn’t find it in himself to care if he woke anybody up by ringing the doorbell. He waited for what felt like ages again, but no one answered it, he thoughts about what to do briefly, maybe he should just turn around and come back later, everyone seemed to be asleep and he wasn’t sure Loki would be in the best mood if Mobius woke him up at shortly past three in the morning, he himself surely wouldn’t be. But then his gaze went upwards and landed on a set of windows, a very specific one, Loki’s windows. 

He had been at the raven’s house often enough to know where the other boy’s windows were placed, and it just so happened that those were the only ones which were illuminated, so Loki was awake. Maybe he had seen Mobius and had chosen to not open the door, he probably didn’t want to see the blond boy anyways, but Mobius wasn’t sure if he could wait that long to talk to Loki. He would probably burst if he had to wait until the morning. 

Suddenly he remembered something and went to dig through the bush outside of the door. Soon enough, he felt cold metal against his hand and pulled out the spare key. 

This was probably the most unethical thing he had ever done, but right now he didn’t care. 

The door unlocked smoothly and he went inside, Rose still clutched tightly in his chest and suddenly his waist coat seemed a lot tighter than it had been a few minutes ago. 

Mobius closed the door behind himself and made his way up the stairs, making sure not to make too much sound. He knew that at least one of Loki’s parents wasn’t home, he just wasn’t sure who was and he didn’t want to take a chance with Odin thinking he was an intruder or something. He wasn’t sure he would make it out alive if that were to happen.

He walked to Loki’s room and gently knocked, then pressed his ear against the door. 

When he didn’t get any response, he started talking. ‘Hey, Loki, it’s me, uhm, Mobius. I really need to talk to you about something. I’m really sorry I just went into your house like this, but I wasn’t sure you would ever let me talk to you otherwise and this is really important.’

He got no response, maybe Loki was really really mad at him. He leaned against the door a little more and suddenly fell into the room. His heart skipped a beat, but there was no one standing in front of him, so Loki’s door had obviously been unlocked, strange. 

When he had calmed down from that slight scare, he looked around the room, it wasn’t too lit up, the only lamp currently being the one on the raven’s night stand. But even from the door out, he could see that the bed was empty and no one had lain in it at all. Mobius’s gaze travelled further across the room, until it landed on Loki’s desk. 

The light from his night lamp was just bright enough to reach it. On the surface there was a book, some school stuff and in the center a piece of paper and some envelopes. He walked over to them and realized that the paper was a list with most things crossed out, things like baking and playing games; he didn’t know what it meant. Then he glanced over at the envelopes and to his surprise, the top one was labeled with his name, he grabbed it hastily and opened it, skimming through the words written unmistakably by Loki. 

He didn’t register what was even written on the note, before the horrid meaning seeped into his bones. His blood ran cold and he disguared the letter and the rose, letting them drop to the floor before he sprinted over to the bathroom, the only other room which had been illuminated. His mind was racing, surely, he wasn’t right about this, surely, this wasn’t what was happening; it couldn’t, shouldn’t. Even more adrenalin was in his veins, but this time to cover up the absolute fear he was feeling, rather than joy or happiness. 

He felt himself freeze in place when he saw the bathroom in front of him, but a second later, his body kicked him back into action and made him walk towards the other boy. 

Loki was lying in the bathtub, head tipped back and eyes closed, and god, there was blood everywhere, Mobius felt like he needed to throw up. ‘No, no Loki, god no, please I just.’ He couldn’t hear his own voice, it was muffled by the sound of the blood rushing through his head and by his ears. Deafening and distracting. 

He wasn’t sure what to do, and his breathing was also starting to become quicker due to his panic, but he tried to not let it show, he needed to help Loki. He put his phone on the floor and immediately dialed 911 before digging out the towels and wrapping them around the raven’s wrists. Distantly, he could hear the emergency dispatcher pick up the line.

‘911 what is your emergency?’ Mobius didn’t trust himself to speak, but he needed to for Loki. ‘My, my friend, he tried to kill himself, he, I don’t know what to do, were at-’ Internally, his mind shut out after that , he could only remember telling the woman his name, where he was and if Loki had a pulse, he had had to feel with his face pressed to the raven’s neck, he was too scared to let go of his arms. The towels were soaking through at an alarming rate, and when five minutes later the paramedics came in and put Loki on a stretcher, followed by a more than confused looking Frigga, Mobius finally broke.

Gut wrenching sobs left him as he sat there, on the bathroom floor, his white shirt and skin covered in Loki’s blood. Frigga followed the paramedics for a few seconds asking them what had happened and tears also left her face when she saw the state her son was in. The paramedics offered her to come with her to the hospital, but she said she would be following soon, looking at Mobius’s pathetic figure still lying on the bathroom floor. 

She walked over to him and hugged him, which resulted in both of them crying into their embrace. Mobius didn’t care that he didn’t even know Frigga that well, he didn’t care that they had only ever met once or twice, he needed this and he was sure she did so too. 

His mind was starting to catch up with the situation at hand and he wasn’t sure if he was happy about that or not. He started crying even more when he finally realized that if he hadn’t told Sylvie about his feelings, if he hadn’t decided to enter this house even though no one answered him, Loki might not have been there by tomorrow, that made him even more panicked. What if Loki wouldn’t make it? He had still had a pulse, but even that had already been weak.

Mobius didn’t know how long the raven had already been lying in the bathtub, or how much blood he had lost. What if Mobius had been too late and there was no more saving him? The blond wasn’t sure he would ever be able to forgive himself if that were to be the case. 

Frigga pulled Mobius up and gave him one last hug, before she looked at his state. Loki’s mother didn’t look much better than Mobius himself, with the difference that she didn’t have the raven’s blood all over her. Both of their eyes were swollen and red and they were both still shaking. She tried to force a smile, but it only ended as a sob, before she pulled Mobius in again.

‘Let’s get you cleaned up alright?’ And all Mobius could do was nod, because he wasn’t sure his voice would let him talk. Frigga helped Mobius wipe off the blood from his hands, arms, neck and face and got him some of Loki’s clothes to wear, as both his suit and shirt were completely drenched as well. Loki’s clothes were too big on him, but he didn’t care, they were the closest thing he had to the raven at this moment. When he was walking out of the bathroom, his foot hit the letter he had dropped in his hurry earlier. He picked it up and sat down on the raven’s bed to start reading it.

Frigga had walked over to Loki’s desk and had picked up her letter, she was currently silently sobbing whilst reading it, trying to keep her composure, but obviously failing. 

Mobius put the letter in the jacket of Loki’s hoodie and stood up, looking around for anything to take with him to the hospital. His eyes landed on the raven’s very familiar crocodile plushie and he immediately picked it up, hugging it tightly. He also went and picked up the rose from earlier. Frigga had changed into a pair of sweats too and she looked back up at him from the letter, a sad smile on her face. 

‘Do you want to come with me, Mobius, I’m sure it’ll be easier for us both if we're not alone there.’ Mobius nodded and they headed for the car, Mobius offered to drive Frigga there, and since she didn’t trust herself to drive at the moment with the shock she was still under, she agreed and soon enough they were on the way to the hospital.

The drive there was empty and quiet, except for the slight sobs that left both of them every once in a while. They comforted each other as much as they could, but they also both knew that they couldn’t actually make the other feel any better since they were both feeling like this over the same exact situation. 

The hospital halls seemed too big and too long, and when Loki’s mother registered them both at the front desk, the man sitting behind them referred them to a room. 

When they got there, the bed was empty, and no one seemed to be there. The two of them sat down on the chairs that were in a corner and Mobius clung to the crocodile a bit tighter. Not even five minutes later, a tall man in a white doctor's cilt came into the room, his face was serious and Mobius wasn’t sure if he should just start crying again. 

‘Hello, I’m doctor Bardot. First off, let me start by saying I know you must be in a very tough place right now, so if you need any psychological help or if you feel like you need it any time in the future, please let me know.’ Frigga barely let him end his sentence, before she started talking, her voice sounding as panicked as Mobius felt and her face reflecting his fear. 

‘Is my son, is Loki going to be alright?’ Mobius’s breath stilled, he needed to hear the answer to this, but he wasn’t sure he could take it if it didn’t happen to be what he was hoping for. 

‘Yes, your son will be alright, it was a very close call and had you found him two minutes later it would have been too late, but they’re stitching him back up, gave him some more blood and he should be here in about twenty minutes.’ Mobius didn’t think he’d ever been this relieved in his life, the revelation that if he came just a few minutes later it would have been too late made his stomach twist in an uncomfortable way. 

Frigga also seemed to realize what Mobius’s actions had done, because a second after she had thanken the doctor and he had excused himself, she went to hug him again, which led to both of them crying again, until the door opened.

Chapter Text

Mobius hadn’t found himself this afraid in years. Loki’s complexions were sunken in, his skin was a silky pale and the veins were visible underneath the skin on his neck. His usually so cared for black waves clung to his forehead and the hospital scrubs he was wearing made him look even sicker. The nurses that had brought in Loki’s bed went to hook him up to an IV, making sure he could get rid of his fever quickly. Frigga gasped when she saw the state her son was in, it truly wasn’t happy.

When the nurses had plugged in the IV, they had laid one of the raven’s arms down on top of the duvets, the short sleeves not hiding the amount of old scars, as well as the thick bandages on his lower arm. Frigga pulled her chair over to the bed and clutched onto Loki’s limp hand, silent tears running down her face. 

Mobius felt like throwing up. The other boy’s sight made him sick, not with disgust at what he looked like, but with guilt. Had he reacted differently when Loki started ignoring him, maybe this wouldn’t have happened. He went over to lay the crocodile by the raven’s feet, not sure if putting it on his chest might interfere with his breathing; the rose was carefully placed on his night stand. Mobius sat back down on his chair, leaving Frigga at Loki’s side as he dug out the letter once more, unfolding it and reading over the lines again and again. 

Dear Mobius,

I’m sorry it came to this, to a note you will have to read once I’m gone; but I think that’ll be for the better. At the end of the day, you were nothing but a nice experience for me, it couldn’t have lasted, I didn’t deserve you. You must know that this isn’t your fault; it never would have been. I don’t think anyone noticed, no one but Sylvie of course, but I didn’t want anyone to notice. The bullying got really bad last week again, and I think that you know, sometimes things are just too good to be true. You were too good to be true, Mobius. And you are the best thing that has ever happened to me. I admire you as a person, I admire your open and kind heart. You were the first person to reach out to me in years and I made my best memories with you. I remember the first time I went jet skiing with you and your father, I had never felt so happy, I never felt any different whenever we met up, I was the happiest when I was around you. 

And of course, my happiness wasn’t entirely dependent on you, but you are the reason I could feel happy in other situations again, you are the reason I could smile and be honest with myself and reconnect with my brother and stand up for myself a little more than usual. I think you probably saved me more times than I can remember, all those nights, I was so close, but you really did save me, even now when I am about to end things, you are a comforting thought in my mind. 

I’m sorry I lied to you, I really am. I didn’t know what else to do, I was so desperate not to lose this, us, our friendship. I didn’t want it all to disappear just because I couldn’t stop myself from catching feelings for someone so out of reach for me. I’m sorry if this makes you feel awkward about the moments we shared, even after my death. I don’t want you to think badly of me, but I have to be honest with you at least one last time. 

I like you, Mobius, and I think I always will, if there is something beyond, I think I even will there. I’m sorry I stayed friends with you for so long, even though I knew my thoughts weren’t the same as yours, knowing my intentions were different than yours and that when you hugged me it meant something different to me than it did to you. 

I don’t know when you will read this, but I just want to say I’m sorry. I know this probably won't be easy for anyone, but I didn’t mean to make anyone feel bad about this. I’m sure the other’s will help you through it, if you do end up needing help, I’m really sorry, just know that maybe it was too late for me to get help, but it won’t be for you.

love Loki

Mobius sighed as the letter went back into his pocket, he didn’t know how many times he had read it by now, he hadn’t counted. Tears had started pricking in his eyes as soon as he had started reading, and by the end of the letter, he could barely focus on the paper anymore. He wiped the tears from his eyes and looked back up at Frigga, who was still sitting at Loki’s side.
Suddenly, the door opened and the same doctor came back in, he looked exhausted, but Mobius guessed as much, it was half past four in the morning and the poor guy had probably been working all night. 

‘Hello you two, I’m glad to say that Loki made it through the procedure and his life is not at risk.’ Frigga nodded, still holding onto the raven’s hand, Mobius couldn’t do much other than watch, a lump forming in his throat as he listened on. Even with the good news, he couldn’t get himself to feel any better. Shouldn’t he be more happy that Loki was going to be okay?

Except Mobius didn’t think Loki would. Someone who was okay wouldn’t do something like this to themselves, he knew how much Loki had suffered and in the end, he had contributed to that directly, even if it was not a conscious decision. He couldn’t help the guilt from creeping up on him when the doctor continued talking. 

‘But, as this is an attempted suicide, we do place your son as a threat to himself, which would mean he would have to be admitted to a psych ward for treatment. This is unfortunately not within your decision and he will be admitted later in the afternoon once he has fully woken up and is conscious again.’ Frigga nodded and he felt with her, he knew that getting Loki admitted at this point was the best decision, even if only for a short time. Maybe it would help. 

‘Can I still visit him?’ The words came out of his mouth faster than he could think about them and he sucked in the air sharply directly after asking, feeling as though his question might not have been appropriate for this situation. But the doctor just answered him calmly. ‘Yes, Loki will be admitted to an overnight facility, but it is just around the corner, so you can get there easily and he can have visitors every day, we even encourage it, since it can keep the patients in touch with the outside world and not lose all of the connections they had before hand, so they still have a proper social life once they can be discharged again.’

Mobius nodded and sighed with relief, no matter how Loki would be gone, at least he could still visit him. The doctor beconned Frigga out of the room, to sign some legal papers regarding Loki’s admission and Mobius was left alone with the other boy. He sat down next to Loki, laying his head down by his side and looking up to that peaceful, yet sad and pained face.

He felt tears roll down his face as he clutched the raven’s hand in his, rubbing his thumb across the back side, just as he had done when comforting Loki. Now that he thought back to all of their interactions, maybe none of them had ever been platonic for either of them. He didn’t feel the urge to hug and be close to Casey or any of the other’s, but he hadn’t realized that it could be something more towards Loki, not until it was too late. 

A sob left him again, what if he had been a little later? What if he had spent too much time reading the letter before going to find Loki, what if he hadn’t held onto the raven’s arms hard enough? Tears wrecked through him and he felt his chest and eyes starting to hurt. Thor would be very visible in a few hours, but he didn’t care. Eventually, his exhaustion got the better of him, and he fell asleep, still clutching to Loki’s hand like a lifeline, his head resting at Loki’s side. 

When Frigga came back into the room, she saw Mobius sleeping at Loki’s side. She gave it a tired smile, the discussion with doctor Bardot had taken longer than she thought it would, the actual reality of what had happened hadn’t even sunken in yet, but she sat down again, exhausted herself, her mind too strewn to even think about anything, not even her husband. Odin.

She had read Loki’s letter, had read how he told her why he felt so bad all the time, what Odin had done to him all of those years and what had happened to him. It almost broke her completely, almost losing her son and losing the man she had loved in one night, it was almost too much. She felt awful for not noticing what had been happening right underneath her nose, she felt guilty for not realizing what had happened between the man she dared to call her husband and her wonderful son, she felt sick for even allowing them to live in one house.

She felt guilty about the fact that she hadn’t noticed what Loki was planning. She had thought he was feeling better, that was an obviously wrong observation, she didn’t know she would trust those anymore. 

Frigga wasn’t certain as to why Mobius was in the house at the time, she wasn’t even sure how he got in at first, but the abandoned spare key on Loki’s desk had explained it to her. She would ask Mobius once he was feeling better, but she knew she owed him everything she had, if it hadn’t been for him, she would have slept through Loki killing himself and wouldn’t have noticed, she would have never forgiven herself.

It was already shortly past five in the morning when she decided she needed to call Thor. She had been so preoccupied with stuff for the past couple of hours that she had completely forgotten, for all she knew, her older son was still out somewhere partying. Frigga hated to think that she would ruin Thor’s last school night, but as his mother, she knew he would be a lot more mad if he only found out what had happened way later. 

The phone rang for a few agonizing seconds, before someone picked up.
‘Hey, this is Jane, sorry Thor’s just taking a shower.’ Frigga smiled at Jane’s voice, she was such a sweet girl, and when Thor had found out Jane got into the same University as he had, he had been so happy all afternoon, Frigga didn’t think she’d ever seen her elder son that happy before and she was glad they were happy together.
‘Oh, could you tell him I called when he’s out, it’s important.’ Jane realized that Thor’s mom sounded worried, just as she was about to answer, her bathroom door opened and Thor came out in a bathrobe. 

‘Oh, he’s actually just out, I’ll give him the phone.’ She told the other woman, handing Thor the phone as he lay down next to her. ‘Hello mother, what are you calling me about, it’s like quarter past five!’ He complained, not like he had been doing any sleeping thus far, but his eyes were getting a bit more tired.
‘Thor it’s about your brother.’ Frigga said, breath shaky and Thor sat up right, worry sinking into his tone as he pushed for her to continue talking. 

‘What happened, is everything alright?’ He asked, but all he could hear was a slight sniff from the other end of the line. ‘Thor, Loki, he’s in the hospital, he’s fine now, Mobius found him I just, you needed to know.’

The blond’s blood ran cold, the implication of what had happened not missing him. He felt like he was going to throw up and cry at the same time. Thor tried to reply to his mother, but all that left his mouth were choked sounds. Jane quickly realized that something was horribly wrong, she hadn’t been able to hear their conversation, but it didn’t seem to be going well.

‘He’s fine, just, we're at the local hospital if you want to come, you don’t need to right now, but I need you to know what happened.’ All Thor managed to gag out was an almost silent ‘yeah.’ After he hung up, his phone dropped to the floor, his face going pale as it scrunched up in pain. How could Loki have done something like this, moreover, why? Why hadn’t he come and talked to Thor? But then the blond realized how little he had been there for his brother in the past few weeks and it made him feel even more guilty. Jane hugged him tightly as he started to cry into her shoulder. 

‘You want to tell me what happened?’ She asked soothingly as her hand massaged Thor’s head in an attempt to calm him down. Thor nodded weakly, before trying to talk again.

‘Loki, he, god, he attempted.’ Another sob left Thor and when Jane realized what her boyfriend had just said, her blood ran equally cold. Even though she wasn’t related to Loki, he had grown on her and at times she saw him like her little brother, this revelation made her eyes sting as she comforted Thor. After roughly ten minutes, he wiped off his tears, not making a difference as they were still freely flowing down his face. There was so much to say, so much to talk about.

Jane knew it wouldn’t do either of them any good if they were to go and never talk about this, but right now wasn’t the moment to do so, there were more important things to do. ‘Jane, would you mind if we drive over? I think I really need to be there right now.’ His voice still quivered, but Jane nodded sharply, she would go along with Thor and if that meant crossing a thin rope over a pool of lava. 

The hospital was pretty much empty at this time of the day, except for the few people who were still waiting in the emergency area, Thor went up to the front desk, the lady sitting behind it looking way too tired to be working at this hour. 

She told them what room to go to, and Thor didn’t think he had ever been so scared to go into a room. Jane held his hand and squeezed it, giving Thor the strength to push down the handle and open the door, stepping into the brightly illuminated room. There in the middle were two beds, one was currently occupied by his mother, who wasn’t asleep, but looked close to it.

The other one was occupied by his little brother. Thor rushed over to Loki, coming to a halt when he saw Mobius laying his head on the mattress and holding on to his brother’s hand in his sleep. He remembered his mother saying that Mobius had found Loki, and if Thor wasn’t mistaking, Mobius was also wearing Loki’s clothes, but now wasn’t the time to question what had happened, because just as he was about to say something to Jane, Loki stirred. 

Chapter Text

Loki slowly woke up, his head hurting and his arms feeling like they were being weighed down by bricks. He looked around and saw Mobius clinging to one of his hands, his head resting by his hip on the mattress; it almost made him smile. 

Sitting up proved to be not as easy as he remembered, his vision was blurry and he couldn’t properly see everything, the corners blacked out and he was also pretty sure his feet had fallen asleep. 

His head was feeling all kinds of woozy and he wasn’t even sure what had happened, why was he here, why was he even in the hospital? The raven looked around once more and saw Thor standing in the corner, seemingly just noticing him; Jane by his side. His brother took a few big steps towards him and before Loki could even ask anything, heavy arms were wrapped around his torso, embracing him in a hug. He tried to process what was happening, but when he gave Jane a confused look over his brother's shoulder, she just gave him a kind of sad and pitiful smile; he didn’t know what to do.

‘I’m so glad you are awake Loki, gods I was so scared.’ Thor said as he moved back away from Loki, who in shock realized that his brother was crying. ‘Thor what’s going on?’ He asked, but before someone could answer his questions, his mother had gotten up from the bed beside him, her smile as tired as his brain felt. He tried to remember, he strained his brain, but something was missing, it was like a word in a different language, where you swear you know what it means, but only really remember its meaning once someone has told you. 

‘Let’s call the doctor Loki, he’ll explain it to you, he said you might have a hard time remembering right after waking up.’ The raven nodded, confused as ever, but at least a bit more calm now. This whole time, he hadn’t let go of the other boy’s hand, it’s weight a calming pressure on his side. He couldn’t exactly look downwards, his neck hurt for whatever reason and his back wasn’t doing any better. Thor had sat back down again, Jane offering a comforting hug, which he gratefully leaned into. A few minutes later, a man walked in, he was tall and had dark hair, his glasses sitting somewhat crooked on his face. He smiled at the raven and nodded at the other people in the room. Then he took a chair and sat down next to Loki with a clipboard in hand. 

‘Hello Loki, I am doctor Bardot, I have been assigned to you ever since you got admitted a few hours ago.’ Loki nodded, the doctor looked like a nice man, maybe he could trust him? 

‘I am sure you have a few questions, including why you are here. The memories will return, but it is completely normal for patients to have short term amnesia because of the soporific we had to give to you earlier, just to make sure you would just wake up.’ The raven tried to focus his vision on the other man, which proved to be more difficult than he had imagined, the face was still blurry in front of his eyes; the only thing he could make out was that doctor Bardot was writing down something on his clipboard. 

‘So, to the main part, you were admitted because of a suicide attempt this morning, I’m sure that it’s not going to be easy hearing this, but you are going to have to talk about why you attempted with a psychiatrist later today, by then your memory should be back, the amnesia only ever stays for up to three hours.’

Loki’s blood ran cold, suddenly, his body was over flooded with emotions he couldn’t seem to get rid off anymore, he didn’t know why either. Grief, Sadness, but most prominently, Shame. How could he have failed at this? Loki thought about what his family might think of him now, how they would treat him after they knew how he had been feeling all this time. Would they shun him? The raven had wanted a clean cut from all of this, to get away and never have to worry about this ever again. Now here he was, right where he started. He remembered a bathtub and blades, the sounds of metal falling to the floor as his vision faded into darkness. He remembered everything, from writing the letters; the contents of those, and also what he had planned. Loki felt sick to his stomach, but suddenly, he felt his hand move.

He looked down with a lot of effort, and saw Mobius starting to wake up. His heart skipped a beat, and then immediately plunged into his stomach, he remembered how he had confessed his feelings to the blond boy in his letter, how he had wanted to tell Mobius at least so he knew why Loki had abandoned him. But now he was here, and that meant Loki would have to talk to him about it, maybe Mobius cared about him a bit and that was why he had come here, but what if he would leave Loki again, once he was clear the other boy felt something romantic in their connection. Loki didn’t want to think about it, so he tore his gaze away and his eyes landed on his other arm, which was heavily wrapped in gauze, but even that had a few light spots of blood on it. 

To say he felt desperate was an understatement, he didn’t know why, but he would rather have succeeded than be here right now. He wasn’t sure he could handle that. Mobius sat up and rubbed his eyes, looking around sleepily before his eyes landed back on the raven. Loki could faintly hear the doctor continue to say some stuff, but his gaze was singularly focused on Mobius, whose eyes were red and swollen and whose mouth corners were ripped slightly. Mobius’s eyes landed on his, their looks meeting and for the first time in what Loki knew were ages did he feel like he wasn’t completely lost and alone.

He knew he had his mother, he had Thor, he was standing just a few feet away from him, but Loki felt more at home with Mobius than he had with any other person, it probably had more to do with the fact that he only eversaw the others inside of their house, which really didn’t have any fond memories. He didn’t even have to look around to realize that Odin wasn’t here, he hadn’t expected him to even come here, even if he knew and he was glad, his fathers scrutiny wouldn’t help him any further. Mobius took the raven’s hand in his. There was so much to be said between them, Loki saw the corner of a letter peeking out from inside of what was definitely his own jumper. So, Mobius had read the letter, why was he here? Maybe just out of pity. 

Mobius was straight, Loki kept reminding himself, he hadn’t even talked to the other boy in a week, what was he even doing here? But he realized that those were questions to be asked in private. He didn’t look away from Mobius, they were still in their own little bubble, but he had started listening to the doctor again too. 

‘If I could have a quick talk with just the patient and his mother please?’ Doctor Bardot said and Thor, Jane and Mobius reluctantly made their way out of the room. The hall seemed all the much colder and Mobius’s hand already ached to hold the other boy’s again. It had felt more than good, the warmth reminding him more and more just how lucky he had been to find Loki when he did, his hand would have been cold otherwise. Mobius shook at the thought, it was gruesome and he dreaded even the possibility. 

His mind raced with possibilities, how everything could have turned out, his mind kept wandering down dark and deep paths that he couldn’t seem to find his way out anymore, his brain was stuck in them like drying cement, and only when the door of Loki’s room opened again, did he somewhat snap out of it. But this time, only Thor was beckoned back inside, making Jane and Mobius wait outside in the cold hall, waiting for answers and hopefully some good news. 

Thor hadn't been able to stand, no less sit still since earlier, he was way too skittish to be calm at this moment, even though he knew it probably wasn’t such a good idea and that it would most likely only make his brother more agitated; he clamped his hands into fists and took a deep breath before entering the room. At this point, Frigga was sitting at Loki’s side, holding one of his bandaged arms. Loki’s eyes were red and he thought he still saw the rest of a tear stuck in his lashes; he didn’t comment on it. ‘So, we are just here to give you a little run down of things, they aren’t going to be easy, and your brother has requested to talk to you and your mother in private. I’ll wait outside, so just call me when you are done.’ Thor nodded and watched as the tall man left the room, through the small opening he could see a worried Mobius trying to catch a glimpse of Loki before the door was shut again. 

He could hear Loki take a deep breath before the raven started talking. ‘I uh, I didn’t expect this, so I don’t really know what to say, I just, I’m so sorry I don’t know what I was thinking-’ Thor cut his brother off with another hug, Loki leaning into his touch as more tears hit the blond boy’s shoulder. ‘No, Loki, you have nothing to be sorry for, I should be sorry, I haven’t been there to care for you, even though I promised, god, I got so caught up in everything I completely forgot, I’m seriously so sorry.’ Loki didn’t answer, he just kept his head buried in his brother’s shoulder, his mother’s soothing hand on his back. 

‘It’s okay, Loki, but I wanted to talk about something with you. It might be a little early to pick at the scabs like this but I need to know. You wrote about how your father, how Odin has been treating you, I don’t know how I couldn’t notice but I just, I feel like I can’t sleep if I don’t know for certain.’ 

As soon as Loki had woken up again, he knew this would be a topic he would have to talk about, he had told his mother about his abuse in the letter he had written for her, hoping that maybe after he was gone, she wouldn’t have to worry about doing anything against her husbands behaviour. 

Since then she wouldn’t have to financially come up for Loki anymore. She wouldn’t have to pay for his school and education, therefore she wouldn’t be dependent on Odin’s money and Thor would be off to Uni anyways and he had a full scholarship, so she would get by alone on her monthly wage if worse would come to worse. Slowly, the raven nodded, not looking his mother in the eyes, he didn’t want to break her heart like this. ‘It’s true, he’s been hitting me every now and then, I just didn’t want to say anything, you all seemed so happy.’ Loki mumbled and tears stung in his eyes.

He really did believe what he said; he thought everyone in his family had been happy, everyone except him. He had always believed that maybe he just didn’t fit in, he didn’t. He was the odd one out, for as long as he could remember, Thor had been the model son; the kind of son everyone would show off to their colleagues to boast about how great of a parent you were. Loki had always been the shame of any parent, and even if Frigga loved him unconditionally all the time, she had never actually told anyone else that she was proud of him. Maybe she just didn’t have as many friends as Odin, but Loki had always heard her talk about Thor’s grades or how he was doing in football. 

He knew his mother wasn’t at fault, somewhere deep inside he knew that she only acted that way because of how Odin had been treating him; it had rubbed off on her in a way. Frigga nodded and put her face in her hands, Loki knew she was crying before he heard her sobs, he didn’t know how to react, so he just hugged her and whispered, ‘I’m sorry.’ In her ear, rubbing his hands across her back in order to calm her down a bit. She shook her head as she looked back up. ‘No need to be sorry Dear, you did absolutely nothing wrong.’ Loki smiled, he knew his mother meant what she said. She still looked sad, but there was also a hint of rage starting to burn up behind her eyes. Loki hadn’t thought about this situation ever occurring, but he hadn’t thought his mother would be so mad, not even at Odin. 

‘Loki, it’s up to you, but I really want to charge him for everything he has done to you; I know a really good lawyer, if you agree, I would call him as soon as I can.’ 

The raven felt his stomach flip with happiness, his mother was trying to do something against his father’s behaviour, maybe it would all get better. The doctor had told him he had to be admitted, and he agreed with that already. He was still anxious about what Mobius was going to say, but he felt like trying to get better might be worth it in the end, so he nodded. ‘Yeah, I’d be fine with that.’ Frigga gave him a big and proud smile and Thor clapped his shoulder, smiling too. ‘I’m proud of you, Loki.’ The blond smiled and Loki could only feel himself becoming even more relieved. 

‘Uhm, I, could I maybe talk to Mobius in private in a second?’ He asked and both Thor and Frigga nodded. His mother already held her phone in her hand, ready to make a very important call. Loki could feel his palms becoming slightly damp as he anxiously waited in the bed. When the door opened again, a very tired, but very relieved Mobius came into the room, gently closing the door behind himself. He walked over to Loki and when the raven moved over slightly, Mobius sat down next to him. 

‘Hey Lokes, glad you’re feeling better.’ Mobius didn’t meet his eye’s and his voice was raspy, Loki felt a dreadful pool in his stomach, what if this was it, Mobius officially talking to Loki for the last time and never even meeting him again. 

‘Yeah, I guess so, I just, god, Mobius, I’m so so sorry, the letter, I wasn’t thinking.’ Loki tried, he didn’t know what he wanted to say, so he just started babbling. But he was interrupted when a firm hand was placed on his, his gaze moved over to where the blond boy’s hand was placed over his own. His voice stilled and Mobius spoke up. 

‘Don’t you dare take back what you told me in that letter.’ It was a simple statement, but Loki’s world felt like it was just thrown upside down, he looked at the other boy confused, only to find that Mobius wasn’t meeting his gaze either, his eyes nervously diverted to the side as he started fiddling with Loki’s hand. 

‘I, Loki, I think I feel the same way about you.’ Mobius said and looked up at the raven, moving his hands to Loki’s face. Loki could see the slight tears in Mobius’s eyes as he smiled up at him, his gaze dropping downwards for a fraction of a second, but Mobius didn’t seem to have missed that. He looked straight into Loki’s eyes, hands still pressed on either side of the raven’s jaw as he asked. ‘Is this okay?’ 

Loki only gave one short nod before he felt the other boy’s lips on his.

Chapter Text

Loki felt the other boy’s hands on his face, Mobius’s lips on his, but he didn’t realize what was happening until a second later. Mobius was kissing him! The raven leaned into the touch and placed one of his hands on the back of the blond’s neck, pulling Mobius closer to himself. It felt magical to Loki, like something finally, finally made sense; even with everything that had been going on, this was right and this was supposed to be like it was. He hadn’t ever felt anything else feel so in place, like the puzzles were just now placed in the right order and for the first time he could see the full picture. 

He didn’t know how he hadn’t realized that Mobius’s feelings might have not been all that platonic this whole time either, their shared moments, the way they comforted each other, none of it had ever been platonic. Maybe Loki had just tried to deny himself this ounce of happiness, this bit of his life actually working out and him getting what he desired. Maybe he hadn’t thought, or rather, hadn’t believed he deserved this.

They both leaned backwards, until Loki was almost lying back down, his hands feeling across Mobius’s short strands of hair and across the warm skin on his neck. They broke apart and both had to gasp for air, lips swollen and red and skin glowing on their faces. Mobius blushed and looked away when Loki sat up again and leaned towards the other, Mobius took him in his arms. Loki felt safe and sound with the other boy holding him, it felt like home, like a home he had never known before. He felt like this might be what he had been waiting for this whole time, but perhaps he should wait for a bit, maybe he would mess it up?

And he was going to be admitted anyways, they wouldn’t be able to see each other as much anymore for quite some time now, what if Mobius didn’t want that? Loki felt worry once again snake up his throat, he had to ask, so he looked up at the blond boy, who was smiling at him sweetly. Loki might just melt at the sight. ‘Mobius, I’m not sure we should do this right now, I’m going to be admitted for some time, what if that’s too hard on the both of us?’ He asked, but Mobius just shook his head, leaning on Loki’s hair.
‘If you really don’t want to, then I’ll wait, I’ll always wait for you; no matter how long. But I really want to try, and I want to be there for you like this when you’re in recovery, I don’t just want to be your friend. So, if you’re okay with it and want to try, I’d love to give us a chance.’ 

Mobius’s words were sickly sweet, and Loki felt all of his fear ebb away with the other’s words, Mobius wanted to try, wanted to give him, them, a chance. Mobius believed in him. 

Slowly, but surely, Loki nodded, agreeing with the other boy. He knew it still wouldn’t be easy, being in recovery wasn’t, and a relationship whilst being an inpatient, that wasn’t easy either; but for the first time in ages, Loki trusted himself to try enough and to work hard enough for this, so that maybe they would survive this and be able to have a normal relationship once Loki was feeling better and was able to be discharged. ‘Does that make us boyfriends?’ Loki asked and the other boy just nodded as an answer. 

‘I’m so happy right now, I don’t even think I can say how much you mean to me Lokes.’ Mobius mumbled into the black waves, Loki felt blood rush to his neck and he leaned back a bit more towards the other boy, Mobius didn't seem to mind and only held on tighter to Loki. 

‘You know, when I found you, I was so so scared-’ but before Mobius could finish his sentence, Loki had whirled around, looking at him alarmed. 

‘You found me?! I thought my mother or Thor simply called you over here!’ But when Mobius slowly shook his head, Loki felt his blood freeze once more. It was Mobius who had found him. Mobius had seen him like how he was and had had to call an ambulance, stay there with him until they arrived, Loki felt even worse about himself. ‘Hey, Loki, it’s fine, I’ll be fine, don’t you worry about me, just worry about yourself okay?’ The raven nodded, but there were still so so many questions he had open, it couldn’t hurt to just ask them, could it? ‘Why were you even there though? I thought you were still at prom?’ Mobius’s face went red and he started playing with his fingers again. ‘Uhm, well you see, I kind of came out to the others last night, and then later on I told Sylvie about my feelings for you, I didn’t know she knew about your feelings too; but anyways, she got really pissed off, something about us not talking to each other and how she was sick of seeing us pining all the time. Long story short, she told me you liked me, I know, she already apologized for doing so, but I wouldn’t have changed anything if I could go back, otherwise I wouldn’t have gone to your home, I wouldn’t have-’ He cuts himself off, a hand over his mouth. 

Loki feels bad for making Mobius feel like this, he hates seeing the blond in such pain and so sad about something that clearly wasn’t his fault either. He wrapped his hands around the blond’s shoulders and pulled Mobius towards himself. They both dropped backwards, lying down being more comfortable for Loki anyways, Mobius lying on his stomach. 

‘You know, Loki, maybe you should call the other’s. I saw that you wrote to them too, I know they still really care about you, even if you don’t really think so, you have to believe me on this one, okay?’ And Loki did believe him, he was scared to call anyone though, so Mobius offered to call them in Loki’s place, which the raven gladly agreed with. 

The phone rang in Mobius’s hand and Loki could feel anxiety settle in his stomach, he could still hear what the others were going to say, the hospital room wasn’t that big and there was no one else around so it was dead silent except for the ringing of the phone. 

After a few rings, someone picked up. ‘Hey, Loki, what's the matter?’ It was Sylvie, of course it was. Out of all the people Loki had connected with in the past few months, Sylvie had been second place after Mobius and they had understood each other quite well; especially when she had found out about Loki’s feelings, as she had been in the same exact situation before. 

‘Hi Sylvie, it’s me, Mobius.’ The blond boy spoke into the phone, looking up to Loki, asking for permission to continue talking. The raven went through Mobius’s hair softly and nodded.

‘Wait, Mobius, oh my god, did you tell him?’ Sylvie sounded happy, and Loki felt relieved, she had been behind this, maybe he could really try being together with the blond. 

‘I, yeah I did but that isn’t why I’m calling, you should uhm, probably come to the hospital, Loki attempted.’ The raven’s hand tensed in Mobius’s hair and the blond just looked up at him reassuringly, his eyes telling him enough. He was going to stand behind Loki and make sure he would be fine, that no one could ever hurt him like he had been in the past ever again. Loki could hear the sharp intake of Sylvie’s breath before she responded. ‘Yeah, sure, is he okay? I, we’ll be there as fast as we can.’ Loki felt his anxiety ebb out of him when he heard her response. He knew they wouldn’t judge him and he just hoped they would maybe consider being his friends again. 

Mobius and the girl exchanged a few more words, but his mind wasn’t listening, instead, he was focusing on Mobius again. The boy who had ultimately saved him, who was making the difficult calls and who was here with him, making sure he was okay and making sure he was comfortable. The sight of the other boy in his clothes made blood fill out his cheeks, but he didn’t think he would mind seeing Mobius in the suit he was wearing for prom, he wondered where that had gone. 

Once Mobius had hung up, he relaxed back onto Loki, wrapping his arms around him comfortably. This kind of physical contact had never been weird between the two of them, but for some reason, now it felt more serious, more intimate, even if not in a sexual way. 

‘Hey, Mobius, do you maybe have a photo of yourself in your Prom outfit, I really wanted to see what you were wearing, but obviously uhm, that wasn’t.’

The raven didn’t finish his sentence, but Mobius ultimately understood, even if it hurt him to hear and remember what had happened, he pulled out his own phone and went to pull up the photo Hunter’s mom had taken of them. He showed Loki, who felt like he had just seen an actual angel. Mobius looked amazing in the suit. It suited him perfectly, and he didn’t want to admit it, but he and Hunter looked really great next to each other too. 

‘You look really really pretty in this.’ He said, taking no filter in front of his words and Mobius felt himself flush at the words, taking in the compliment with a gentle smile on his lips. It made Loki glad he was able to make Mobius smile like that.

He wanted to see it again, and possibly forever. 

They lay there for a few more minutes, Loki starting to feel a bit tired too and his eyes falling closed every once in a while. It was only just six in the morning, but he had no doubt the other’s had stayed awake until now, so they had probably been quite exhausted too. 

Suddenly, there was a knock on their room door, and when Mobius got up and beckoned them inside, Loki was happy to see everyone. 

They were all still in their prom outfits, apparently not having had the time to change into anything else before making their way over to the hospital. It was Sylvie, who went and gave him a hug first, she strode over to him and pulled him against her. Loki felt happy in the embrace, a smile forming on his face. 

For some reason, he didn’t know why he had ever thought death was a better outcome than this. Everything seemed so perfect at the moment, his friends were here, his boyfriend was here. He started to believe that maybe, at the end of all of this mess he could get out and actually be happy. There was a long way still ahead, but for now he was happy.  

‘I’m so glad you’re okay, Loki.’ Was what he first heard when Sylvie started talking and Loki felt tears come near his eyes again. He exchanged hugs with the other’s too and felt more than grateful by the end of it. They had all come here, Casey, OB, Ravonna, Hunter and Sylvie, interrupting their Prom celebrations, just to see him in the hospital bed with the aftermath of an attempt. They sat down across the other bed and chairs, in a circle. Loki knew that talking about everything was probably a bit much for himself just now; it was still so fresh, and he felt too vulnerable to lay bare everything that had happened before them.

Mobius was curled up against his side as they sat up and were talking to the other’s.

Not about his attempt, but about Prom, how it had been and Loki made sure more than once that Mobius had had a fun evening. Neither Mobius, nor Loki had yet to tell them they were actually together, but he was pretty sure they could guess by now. They were practically stuck at the hip, Mobius clinging to Loki whenever he could, and the very much not accidental touches lingered for a lot longer than it would between normal friends.

‘Uhm, Loki, so, if you’ll be admitted, can we still like, talk to you, or at least send you letters and stuff?’ Casey asked concerned and it made Loki’s heart clench, they actually cared about him enough to want to visit him. 

‘Yeah, yeah you can, I mean, I’ll have visiting hours, but all in all, I can have basically anyone as my guest there.’ The other’s nodded enthusiastically, but he also realized that they were slowly becoming more tired and he didn’t blame them. All of them had a long night of partying behind them and he was pretty sure he would be just as tired. 

‘You know, you don’t have to stay here forever, right? I can see you’re all tired, I am too, so you can go if you want to. I can text you everything when I get the info?’ He asked and Hunter nodded, a big yawn escaping her as she stood up and gave the raven another hug, pressing her head onto his shoulders. ‘I’ll be okay, I promise.’ He said to her and with the weight of Mobius’s hand still on his, he was motivated to get better, maybe even recover completely.

When the other’s left, Mobius looked back up at him, but he saw the blond’s eye’s already falling shut slowly. ‘Look, Mobius, if you’re tired, you can go home too, I won't force you to stay here if that’s what you’re worried about. My mother and Thor are still here, I’ll be fine on my own.’ But deep down, Loki knew he really didn’t want Mobius to leave, so he felt relieved when the other boy shook his head and leaned up to kiss him once again. 

‘I don’t want to though, I’m more comfortable here anyways.’ 

Loki returned the kiss and when Mobius’s hands wandered from his torso to his head once more, no one mentioned it. 

They fell asleep soon after, and when Thor and Frigga came back from a very interesting phone call and saw the two of them on the hospital bed, cuddling and lips obviously swollen, they didn’t do anything other than share knowing looks.

Chapter Text

It was already later in the afternoon when Loki and Mobius woke back up. Mobius rubbed at his eyes and yawned, stretching slightly as he leaned over the raven. Loki looked back at him, smiling when he realized that none of this had been a dream; that it had all been real and he had actually started being together with the other boy. 

‘Hey Lokes, how are you doing?’ Mobius asked, kindness and concern lacing his voice as he spoke. ‘I’m feeling better, not that great yet but you know.’ Mobius just nodded, obviously, if Loki would be doing fine he wouldn’t be in the hospital right now, but the blond boy trusted Loki to tell him the truth and if the truth was that Loki was feeling at least a bit better, then he would be more than happy to hear that. ‘That’s nice to hear, do you know when the psychologist is coming in?’

Mobius asked, glancing over at the clock that just read shortly after three in the afternoon. Loki just shook his head.

‘No, they didn’t tell me; just said that they would come around this afternoon but the doctor wasn’t sure when the psychologist would have time either.’ The blond boy nodded.

Suddenly, as if summoned by their words, the door opened and Frigga walked in, followed shortly by doctor Bardot and another nice looking lady with long black hair and a smudged eyeliner.

She didn’t look like how therapists and psychologists were usually portrayed in shows or on TV; there, they always looked kind of stiff and stuck up, but this woman looked relaxed and very chill overall. Loki immediately liked her and felt that maybe he would even be inclined to talk to her honestly about how he was feeling. Mobius had quickly jumped up when the other people had come in.

He and Loki hadn’t talked about who they wanted to know about their relationship, and even if they hadn’t hidden their affection that blatantly among the others, they had already known anyway; so that hadn’t been an issue. 

This however was, at least in Mobius’s thought process. What if Loki’s mother wasn’t okay with her son being in a relationship with another man? He knew Frigga was an all around wonderful person, but he knew that some people just couldn’t be trusted with stuff like this, that some people would switch up immediately when they found out something as simple and as simple as a person's sexuality.
He hadn’t really thought about how his relationship with the raven would impact him in his day to day life, but now he thought about it, it would probably change a lot.

They lived in Texas, after all.

And next to the strong dialect, the state was especially known for its very conservative views and politics, that didn’t make it easy for any person who just happened to not fit those ideals to live in peace. 

Would the people at school be fine with it if they ever found out? His friends had all been so accepting, but what about all the strangers? Would Mobius suddenly be known as just the gay kid?
He found himself worrying about Loki even more than himself. The raven had had to endure so much more bullying in the past, and it had been a big reason for him attempting in the first place.

He was glad that the people who had previously done these awful things to Loki were now on their way to uni and that the raven would probably never have to see them ever again, but it didn’t sit with him in the right way, that there had been countless people who had stood by and even joined in gladly. What if someone decided that now they wanted to start bullying the raven because of his relationship?

The blond did hope for Loki to get discharged from the facility before the new school year started, because he knew that he wouldn’t have that much free time left to visit Loki, and if the raven was back in school, they would still be able to see each other during school hours. 

Mobius felt a bit bad about thinking like that, shouldn’t he just hope for Loki to get discharged when he was feeling better? It was a bit selfish, he admitted to himself, and promised to think more about Loki’s wellbeing. What would his dad even say? God, Mobius hadn’t even thought about that possibility.

During all the chaos it had completely slipped his mind and he wasn’t sure he even wanted to think about that situation at the moment. But obviously, at some point he would have to tell his dad.
He didn’t want to keep such an important part of his life a secret from him.

Mobius knew that his dad was a more conservative type, so it made him a bit scared to think about how he would react to his own son being into guys as well. But then again, he had never agreed with his mother when she had said some pretty awful things about gay people and back in his old home town, everyone was at least a bit conservative, it was just how small little towns like that worked. 

Nonetheless, Mobius still hoped that his dad wouldn’t react too strongly, maybe he wouldn’t care?
When Loki’s mother, the doctor and the psychologist had entered the room, Mobius had quickly sat down on the bed opposite from Loki’s and had pretended that he hadn’t just been lying in the other boy’s arms a few seconds ago.

After the doctor had initially introduced the psychologist, he asked everyone else to leave the room to let Loki speak to the woman by himself. 

Once they were outside in the hallway, doctor Bardot turned to Frigga once more. ‘I have already told you about your son being admitted to a mental hospital for a minimum stay of two weeks, you will have to get him some clothes as he will be driven there directly after his conversation with Hela.

I already gave you the address, so it would be nice if you could bring some of his essential things like clothes, toiletries or other things you think he might need. A few rules though, nothing sharp and we unfortunately don’t allow drawstrings on hoodies or shoelaces for safety reasons.’ Loki’s mother nodded and looked over at Mobius. 

‘Would you maybe like to come with me and help me pack? I think you probably know what he needs more than me.’ Mobius nodded and they both went to the car park together, where Mobius’s car was still parked. It was a lot warmer outside now than it had been in the middle of the night when Loki had been brought to the hospital, so Mobius was starting to feel a bit warm in Loki’s sweater. 

Whilst they were driving back to Loki’s house, Frigga turned to him. ‘You know, I think he really loves you.’ Mobius felt caught off guard by the statement, did that mean she knew? Was she okay with it or was this a way of telling Mobius to stop being involved with Loki? He simply wasn’t sure. ‘I- I mean.’ He was cut off gently by the raven’s mother again. 

‘Don’t be worried, I’ve known for a long time that Loki was very much not just into girls; I just never said anything about it because of his father. Not even Thor has anything against it, we saw you two lying in bed together earlier, I’m just glad it worked out for the two of you.’

The blond only had a second to feel embarrassed about what the raven’s mother had said before feeling just so, so grateful. He had been anxious, but now that he knew they at least had Frigga and Thor’s support it made a lot of things easier. 

‘Thanks’ Mobius just managed to say, his cheeks burning up quickly. Frigga just smiled and nodded. They soon pulled up to the Odinson’s house, and to Frigga's relief, her husband's car was not in the driveway, that would still give her some time to prepare to tell him. 

When she had called her lawyer, an old friend of hers, he had immediately agreed to take their case. He had said that with the probability of at least some witnesses to Loki’s wounds, there was a very high chance of actually winning the case against Odin and Frigga had been more than relieved to hear that. 

Loki’s room still looked exactly the way they had left it and Mobius wasn’t sure he liked that. The envelope of his letter was still lying by the desk and he had a slight sting of iron in his nose. The memory made him feel sick and he almost threw up right there again. Mobius was just glad they had washed away all of the blood earlier, when adrenalin was still fresh in his veins. Neither him, nor Frigga felt like they would be able to do the cleaning right now. 

The packing went by quite fast, Mobius and Frigga getting some of Loki’s favourite but also comfortable clothes; he would probably need those more often. The bag they were packing was already bulging full, when Mobius remembered to pack some books for the raven. He would suely bore himself to death if he didn’t have anything to read with him. 

‘There we go.’ He smiled as they put Loki’s fully packed bags by the bottom of the stairwell. Frigga smiled at him gratefully. ‘Thanks so much Mobius, it really means a lot to me. I’m glad for your help, really.’ The blond boy nodded as they went into the kitchen, where Frigga packed a few cinnamon rolls she and Loki had baked the day before; she was sure Loki would like to eat something that wasn’t horrible hospital food. 

‘Here, could you hold these for me for a second?’ She asked and handed him the bag. Mobius took the pastries and waited in the hall whilst Friga scribbled down something on a piece of paper, which she then laid down on the kitchen table. 

‘There we go, okay, let’s go.’ She nodded when she had finished writing the note to Odin. She just wanted to make sure that he knew where to find her. She hadn’t written down that Loki was at the mental hospital at this point; she didn’t think Odin would appreciate that all too much. When the two of them were back in Mobius’s car on the way to the ward, she called Thor, who immediately picked up. 

‘Hey Thor, I’m just on the way to the ward, you can come too if you want to.’ She said and heard Jane mumbling something to Thor. ‘Yeah, I’ll be there in a bit, do I need to bring anything?’ Frigga thought about it for a second, but then shook her head. She was pretty sure Loki had probably taken the crocodile plush Mobius had brought to the hospital for him with him to the ward. He wouldn’t have forgotten that. ‘No, we have all of his stuff.’ 

‘Okay, I’ll see you in a bit, love you.’ Thor said and hung up. Frigga knew that the words of affection probably meant a lot more to Thor now that Loki had attempted, they did to her at least. She had just thought about what her last interaction with Loki had been when she saw him on that stretcher being carried out. How afraid she had been that she wouldn’t have been able to say ‘I love you’ to her son one last time. She would make sure to say it more often from now on, to Thor too, just because she realized how important it was. 

The way to the ward was a quiet one, in some way it made both of them realize just how serious the situation actually was; that Loki would be gone for a few weeks. Frigga hoped that those weeks would be enough for her to settle everything with Odin, but she doubted it.

Because, although she had an amazing lawyer and enough proof of everything, Odin would fight against it. It would damage his image too much and he would try desperately to save said image. 

The ward seemed way too big and overwhelming, a large grey entrance greeting them when they arrived and brought Loki’s stuff with them. The lady at the front desk seemed nice, and in contrast to the outside of the building, the inside was surprisingly colorful and seemed almost cheerful for what it was actually meant for. 

‘Hello, we are here to see Loki Odinson, he was admitted just earlier today.’ Frigga said, a lump evident in her voice. It hadn’t been easy for her either, and saying it out loud just meant solidifying everything that had happened. 

‘Oh, sure, he was just brought to his room earlier, down the hall and the fifth door to the left.’ She smiled and Mobius and Frigga followed her directions; their footsteps echoing in the marble hall. The door they reached was heavily decorated, a bunch of spider and superman sketches stuck to the plain white wood, there were also some scribbles drawn on; Mobius wasn’t an art genius, but he thought they all looked really good.

They knocked three times and waited for a few seconds, before someone opened the door. It was a tall skinny boy with short brown hair. He just stood there for a second, his eyes dropping to the bags the two of them were holding before his eyes seemed to brighten and he turned around. 

‘I think this is for you!’ The brunette opened the door and beckoned them inside. The room was very much decorated on one side. The whole wall was covered with posters and a bunch of stuffed toys lying on the bed on the right side. 

Loki was sitting on the bed opposite, and it showed that he hadn’t been here for long; his side of the room was completely cale, and except for his crocodile, there wasn’t anything personal of him in the room. 

The raven’s eyes brightened and he jumped up when he saw Mobius and his mother. He walked over to them and hugged his mother tightly before turning to the blond boy standing beside her.

‘I’m so happy you’re here!’ He smiled and Mobius felt his heart melt. He nodded and pulled the taller boy into a bone crushing hug. Unfortunately, the bag Mobius was still holding got somewhat in the way, so they broke apart somewhat awkwardly. 

‘We uhm, we got some stuff for you, if you need anything else just text me and I’ll bring it over.’ Loki smiled and nodded, taking the bag and the small suitcase from his mother and Mobius before laying them down beside his bed. 

‘I completely forgot to introduce you, this is Peter, he’s going to be my roommate for the time being.’ Peter waved happily when mentioned and went back to sketching something into his book like he had been doing for the past few minutes. 

‘I hope you’re going to feel better, I really do.’ Frigga said as she turned to her son, who nodded and took her hands in his.
‘I’ll try my hardest, I really will.’  

Chapter Text

A few minutes later, Thor and Jane also arrived and Peter left the room after introducing himself to give the family a bit of personal space. 

‘Hey, Loki, how are you?’ Thor asked as he gave his younger brother a tight hug, the embrace lasting longer than it usually did between the brothers. Thor had also realized just how important the raven was to him and knowing that he almost lost the other boy was a little too much on his head at the moment so he held on tight for as long as he felt was acceptable and took a step back. 

‘I’ll wait outside, okay?’ Mobius said and got up from where he had been sitting next to Loki for the past half an hour. Loki nodded as the blond boy got up and went towards the door, his hand brushing the raven’s cheek as he passed him. 

Outside was a bit colder than the room itself, but Mobius felt happy that the guy Loki had been put with seemed nice, a little hyper, but still nice. To his surprise, Peter was sitting on one of the chairs just opposite of his room, a sketchbook and pen in hand. 

Mobius went to sit down next to him and smiled at Peter. ‘Hey, what are you drawing?’ He asked and the brunette seemed startled by his presence at first, but when he realized who was sitting next to him, his shoulders relaxed and he turned the page towards Mobius so he could see what he had been drawing. On the page there was a saturated superhero visible, a spider on his chest with a red and blue suit. Mobius was more than impressed by the boy’s skills; he was sure Peter and Loki would get along. 

‘I’ve never had a roomie before you know, it’s kind of exciting.’ Peter confessed and Mobius nodded, he didn’t want to ask why Peter was here in the first place, seeing as he had heard before that doing so was considered kind of rude, but Peter seemed to be able to read his mind, answering his question without him ever asking it. 

‘I’m sure you’re probably curious why I’m here, outsiders always are.’ He grinned and Mobius felt caught for ever questioning it. ‘I mean, you really don’t have to tell me, I’m sure it’s a personal thing.’ Peter nodded, but went on anyway. ‘Yeah, but I don’t make that big of a deal about it, it is what it is.’ Mobius nodded, but the younger boy started talking before he could answer. ‘My aunt died a few months ago, didn’t cope well, and landed here.’ 

‘I’m sorry for your loss.’ Mobius said, he didn’t exactly know what it must have felt like for Peter, he had lost his mom, but those were vastly different circumstances. 

‘Thanks, I’m getting better, might even get out in a couple a’ weeks; I’m excited to see my uncle happy, he visits me every now and then.’

Mobius and Peter spoke for another quarter of an hour before Frigga popped her head through the door and said they could come back in. Loki was still lying in bed, probably tired because of everything that had happened within the past couple of hours, but when Mobius came in, he sat up and beckoned for the other boy to lie back down next to him, Mobius agreed and let himself relax into the fresh hospital sheets.
Frigga thanked Mobius for bringing her to the ward with him, and that Thor would be taking her home, as she still have a few things to discuss with both Thor and their lawyer. 

When they had left, Mobius was left alone with Loki, Peter having left for visiting time, where his uncle was coming to see him. Mobius was just lying down and replacing back onto Loki’s torso, when his phone rang in this pocket, it showed his dad’s name. He quickly realized that he had completely forgotten to tell his dad where he had gone, in a hurry he picked up and held his phone to his ear.

‘Hey dad, god sorry, i completely forgot to tell you I-’ His dad caught him off with a slight chuckle. ‘Don’t worry Mobius, your friends dropped by and told me about Loki’s situation, I completely understand why you forgot.’ Mobius felt relief wash over him and he was eternally grateful for his friends. ‘Yeah, sorry about that, why were you calling?’ He asked and his dad answered him quickly. 

‘Uhm, this may come a bit unexpected, but earlier when your friends came to visit we saw some paramedics over next door, Mrs Ortiz seems to have passed away, she was already so old.’ Mobius didn’t know what to answer, Mrs Ortiz had always been such a sweet and loving woman, even if he hadn’t known her for a long time. Everytime she had backed something she had brought over a share for Mobius and his dad, and they had done the same for her.

She had even invited them over for dinner sometimes and they had shared a few fun evenings, exchanging recipes and talking about fun things. Her mistaking Loki for his girlfriend the first time she saw him always made him chuckle, what would she have said if she knew they were now actually together?

A wave of sadness washed over him, he didn’t know why he felt so strongly, but she had really grown on him and he had almost considered her a part of the family. 

‘Thanks for the info, I uhm, I’ll be home later, love you dad.’ He could almost hear his dad smile into the phone. ‘Love you too, dear, it’ll all turn out better in the end, I promise.’ 

‘I’m sure it will; see you later.’ Mobius answered and hung up shortly after. Loki, who had been sleeping soundly underneath him, hadn’t heard anything off the conversation Mobius had just had with his dad, so he didn’t understand why the other boy seemed so upset when the raven woke up. ‘Hey, Mobius, is everything alright?’

He asked as the other boy went to put his shoes back on; it was already almost seven in the evening by now and Mobius had told his dad he would be home later. Mobius just avoided the other boy’s eyes as he answered. ‘You remember Mrs Ortiz right? She passed away earlier, my dad told me on the phone.’

Loki went to hug his boyfriend, realizing that Mobius had gone through two tragedies in one day, first finding Loki bleeding out in his bathtub, then having his neighbour die. 

‘I’m sorry, I’ll see you tomorrow?’ He asked hopeful and Mobius gave him a peck on the lips and a reassuring smile. ‘Yeah, I’ll come by during visiting hours.’ 

Loki felt strengthened by the other boy’s words; maybe he would be able to get through this with the other boy’s help. He also felt like he would get along quite well with his roommate; Peter seemed like a nice enough boy. 

The night air was already chilly when Mobius left the ward, even though it was the middle of summer, maybe Mobius was just feeling cold. He went to his car and drove home, a numb sensation spreading through him, starting in his chest and moving all the way to his fingertips and toes. He wasn’t sure what he was feeling; in fact, he wasn’t sure if he was feeling anything at all.

The feeling stayed in his nerves up until he arrived at home, in front of his neighbours door; the fairy lights and the tacky doormat still in place. Nothing visually hinted at the fact that the inhabitant was no longer alive; but Mobius knew that she wasn’t.

He tried to get himself to look away from the door; Mrs Ortiz's death shouldn’t have phased him that much, it shouldn’t have surprised him as much as it did. He didn’t know exactly how old she was, but she must have been way over eighty already.

He unlocked the door to the apartment he and his dad shared and went to the living room, where his dad was sitting on the couch, watching some movie and eating some crisps. ‘Hey, Mobius, how are you doing?’ He asked, but suddenly, Mobius didn’t know how to react; for some reason, he couldn’t even get a word out of his throat. It was like they were stuck there, unable to be spoken out loud. 

His dad seemed to understand what was going on, he paused the movie and stretched out his open arms towards his son. Mobius dropped his formerly tense shoulders and let himself fall into his dad’s embrace.

The dams broke and a second later he was full on sobbing into the man’s shoulder. Mobius didn’t know why he was feeling the way he was, he felt numb until a few seconds ago, and now he was suddenly feeling everything he had ever felt; it was all a bit much for him.

Everything that had happened not even within the last twenty four hours was starting to weigh down on him, and it was a lot. Starting with the amazing Prom he had had, the memories of that almost washed away entirely by everything else. He remembered the happiness he had felt when Sylvie had made him realize just what Loki had been feeling for him. 

Then the absolute horror when he had found Loki in the state he was in, the fear and disbelief, him feeling entirely disconnected from reality and what was happening around him. Just now did he realize that he hadn’t had a single moment to himself where he could sort out everything in his brain and deal with them; it had gone from one thing to the next. 

Getting Loki’s stuff with Frigga and meeting him again in the ward, getting together with Loki. It felt like a dream come true; but amidst all of the other things that had happened, it didn’t make Mobius feel any better and he hated himself for it. He had seen the way Loki had smiled at him after the kisses, had seen how he made the other boy feel; and yet, it hadn’t made him feel any better, it had only gotten rid of the numbness for a while. 

There was no doubt that he still had feelings for the raven, that he didn’t regret getting together with Loki at this point in time whatsoever, he just hoped he himself could feel a bit more about the whole situation and not be overwhelmed like this. 

And then Mrs Ortiz had died, the person he considered as his own family next to his dad. He hadn’t been prepared, and with everything that had happened so far, maybe her death was just one shovel too much. 

He stayed curled up in his dad’s arms for ages, both of them missing the time they used to hug more often, when Mobius’s parents were still together, that hadn’t happened, Mobius’s dad was influenced by his mom, and they had been so at each other's throats all the time that in phases there would barely even be enough time for anyone to spend time with Mobius. He remembered when his parents had had a particularly big fight just a few days before he had his drivers licence test, his dad had been spending most of his time at work and his mom would stay home and drink.

When Mobius had gotten home with his driver's licence after he had passed the exam with flying colous, all he was met with had been a snarl and a fight with his mom afterwards. In the evening, he had been too tired to talk to his dad and tell him about it.

They didn’t speak about the blond boy’s mom often, barely at any point in time. But both knew that they were better off without her, that their relationship was doing a lot better now that Mobius’s mother no longer had the chance to sabotage their emotions. 

Mobius didn’t know when he had fallen asleep; but he guessed that his exhaustion had gotten the better of him at some point. But when he woke up in the morning, he was tucked into bed comfortably, still in Loki’s clothes. They sat comfortable on his skin and the raven’s cologne stuck to them in a way that made him think of Loki every time he breathed in. 

He got up and found his dad in the kitchen, preparing some breakfast for the two of them. 

After they had had breakfast and a short chat, they had decided on going jet skiing today. It had been far too long and the weather was perfect for going out today; the sun shining and not too much wind either. 

At the beach, Mobius felt freer than he had in the past couple of days, minus the time he had spent with Loki, and he felt like there was nothing he had to do. No school keeping him from his interests and hobbies and no expectations for him to uphold his reputation by the people on the football team who threw comments at him about his friends.

He was just glad he wouldn’t have to see some of them ever again after the summer was over; especially not Hogun, Fandral and any other people who had been picking at Loki simply for being a little different.

The sun shone onto his skin as he drove out onto the sea, the wind brushing back his hair which had slightly grown in the past couple of weeks, making him finally lose the office worker hairstyle and was working its way more towards a slight mullet.
Maybe one day it would be long enough for him to tie it back in a bun?  

For now, he decided to not pay anything any mind, letting his thoughts drift away like the waved he was riding across, the wind and the sun travelling with him like old friends that he knew had his back.

Chapter Text

When morning came around, Frigga had already been up for a couple of hours, making sure that Thor was awake with her at the early hour of five in the morning. She knew that Odin would come back home today, ending his business trip a day early. The raven’s father did not yet know what had happened to his son; and Frigga thought it was probably better that way, for now.

After Thor and her had left the ward yesterday, she had had a very long conversation with her older son about how they should go from here. They had both decided that living in the same house as Odin would no longer be an option, and since the property legally belonged to the man, he would be able to decide over it.

The two of them had stayed up until late at night, packing a few things and already loading them into Thor’s car. Now, they were just waiting out the time until Odin would come back so they could explain the whole situation to him.

But, no matter the outcome, they wouldn’t stay in the house. No matter how strong Thor was, Frigga didn’t want her other son in the same house as the man who had abused her other son for ages, her trust in him had deteriorated the second she had read the letter Loki had written for her, making it very clear how he had been treated at home and also at school. 

She had booked a hotel for a week for her and Thor to stay in, after that, they’d see what would happen with the lawsuit and would go looking for a new apartment too.

It was shortly past nine when the front door opened and Odin came walking into the house, carrying a small suitcase behind him, still wearing his formal suit. 

He went to hug his wife, to which she only responded very weakly, not wanting to immediately make her husband suspicious of her. 

‘Hello dear, how was your weekend?’ He asked and Frigga gave Thor a knowing look. ‘It wasn’t the best, there’s a few things I would like to discuss with you, and Thor.’

Odin spun around confused and walked over to the table, where the other two had previously been sitting, he didn’t sit down though. 

‘What is it? I really don’t have that much time right now, I still need to finish up some things from work.’ Frigga ignored his complaint and started talking.

‘Well, as you may notice, your other son isn’t with us right now, he’s in the hospital at the moment, the mental hospital.’

Odin just scoffed, it wasn’t like Frigga had thought he would show any normal emotions of empathy, but Odin’s reaction just made her trust in him crumble more and more. 

‘I knew he’d land there at some point, he looks like he belongs there.’ Frigga felt like her blood was about to boil over, Thor felt equally as mad, a vein slightly showing on his throat. 

‘What do you mean, he looks like he belongs there? That’s your son, you are supposed to love him unconditionally!’

She managed to say through gritted teeth. Odin seemed to understand that something was going on here and finally sat down. He didn’t seem any more caring about the situation.

‘I said what I said, I don’t care what happened as long as he’s gone for a while that’ll benefit all of us, maybe we could actually host a garden party or something without being embarrassed because someone has to see him.’ 

Frigga had enough, she stood up and slammed the palms of her hands down on the table, making everyone, including Thor, who had been very quiet the whole conversation flinch as the impact hit them. 

‘You know what, I was going to do this in a nice way, I thought maybe there would be a civil solution to all of this, but I guess there isn’t. Loki told me everything, he wrote what you’ve been doing to him all these years and I never knew but I’ve had enough now, I already contacted a lawyer, Thor and I are leaving and we'll see you again in court.’ 

Thor had been somewhat shocked by his mother’s outburst, her emotions usually never got the better of her, but apparently this was a more important matter. Odin looked more than shocked, angry even, his face was red and his eyes were overcooked with fury.

He went to say something, but Frigga had already stood up, gabbing Thor by his hand as she pulled him out of the kitchen and towards the car.

This had been the exact reason why they had already packed everything the night before.

As they got into the car, they could hear Odin yelling after them, telling them to come back and talk to him but they ignored him, shutting the car door as they drove off. 

Thor could tell how his mother relaxed once they were a few minutes away from their former home, it was all very stressful, even for her and now he could directly see just how much this had been weighing down on her too.

He reached out and rubbed his hand on her shoulder as a way of comforting her, she looked at him for a short while before focusing on the road ahead again, a smile on her lips.

‘I’m sure it’ll all be fine, trust me.’ Frigga nodded and they soon got to their hotel, checking in for the night as they dropped off their bags.

It was just about quarter to ten, which meant until Loki’s visiting hours, which were between three and five in the afternoon, there were still some hours to use up until they could see him again. 

In the end, they decided to go and have something to eat together. It had been so long since the last time they had spent some time together, just the two of them. 

Lunch was nice, and while they were having some nice pasta, Frigga’s lawyer had called once more, finalizing the draft he had made for their lawsuit and all of the evidence, needless to say, both of them were very pleased with the results that were presented to them and also with the news that they would be able to get their first court hearing next week. 

When they went and entered the ward it smelled strongly like disinfectant, but Thor guessed that it probably always smelled that way.

Loki’s room already seemed a bit more homely than the day before, so that it didn’t give off the vibe of an actual hospital room.

The raven had unpacked some of his luggage which Mobius and Frigga had brought over the day before, so now there was a stack of books on his night stand and a few posters on the wall.

Some of Loki’s clothes were lying on the floor and he was obviously just clearing in his cupboard. Mobius was also there, the blond boy sitting on the bed, holding Loki’s crocodile plush in his lap and helping his boyfriend fold some of his clothes so Loki could clear them away.

Both of them looked up at them when Thor and Frigga entered the room, smiling and welcoming them. ‘Hello, good to see you.’ Frigga said as she hugged her son and Mobius nodded a welcome back too.

Thor gave Loki an affectionate pat on the shoulder as the two of them beckoned Loki to come and talk to them in private. Mobius offered to leave the room, but Loki shook his head and just said that he’d be back in a bit. 

When they had found a couch in one of the lounges, Frigga sat down on an armchair in front of her younger son and took his hand in hers. 

‘So, Loki, I know this might just be a little much to drop on you after two days, but I contacted my lawyer, you know how much I want you to be safe once you get out of here. He said we would be able to sue your father, very timely too, but for that we would need you to speak as a witness in court and I just want you to be fine with that.’

Loki didn't answer for a while, his blood had stopped pumping into his heart for a second and he wasn’t sure how or what to answer.

After his numbness had slipped out of his fingers and had dripped out of his blood, the first thing he realized he felt was joy. Unfiltered and raw joy.

He knew that maybe it was a weird feeling to be happy that someone might get sued, but in this case, it was the best possible outcome, one he hadn’t even thought would ever be possible.

In the few months before he had planned out his death, he always thought he wouldn’t be free of his father ever.

In his mind, his life, if ever lived out, had always contained his father’s abuse and unending torment; at least until he could move out.

But like this? Did this mean he would at least get one year of his high school life back and maybe be able to live with at least only the challenges of school and not also his home life?

His hope had never been this high either as he hugged his mother and told her he would be ready to talk in court any day if it meant getting some of his freedom back.

But a few questions snuck into his mind, he turned to his mother once more, concern lacing his voice.

‘But, are you still staying with him, maybe that isn’t the best option if he knows you’re suing him.’ He exclaimed but Thor just sent their mother a knowing look. 

‘Don’t you worry about that, Loki. We’ve already checked in for a hotel; we’re going to stay there for like a week, the first hearing in court is next week and after that we’ll look for a new place.’

The raven felt relieved when he heard the answer because he knew he wouldn’t have liked knowing that his brother and mother would still be staying in one house with Odin after they knew what he had been doing.

All of his belongings would have to be moved out at some point and whilst he did have a big part of his closet already with him, very gratefully including most of his favourite pieces of clothing.

But he decided that those things were not his priority at the moment, he would throw away all of his belongings if that meant getting away from Odin.

He had his most important stuff and anything else that he might have liked a lot would have to be replaced if worse came to worst and Odin wouldn’t let them access their stuff anymore.

After that, Frigga and Thor excused themselves, giving Loki a big hug and a hearty goodbye each and promising to come back the next day but they still had another meeting with Frigga’s lawyer later in the evening to set up a proper case file. 

When the door opened again an hour later and Loki came back, Mobius had almost finished clearing in his entire cupboard already, everything neatly sorted and folded, so Loki could find everything again.

He noticed immediately how the raven seemed to be buzzing with energy, just like he had been when Mobius first arrived; which had been after his first therapist appointment.

Loki had told him that the therapist he had seemed really nice and he felt like getting a big weight off of his shoulders after talking to her for only one and a half hours.

Now, Loki walked over to the other and sat down next to him, taking the other boy’s hand in his and rubbing circles over the back of it, smiling contently to himself. 

‘You want to tell me what’s up Lokes?’ Mobius asked and Loki nodded shyly, leaning on the other boy’s torso as to stabilize himself, his fingers still felt eclectic and as if they were buzzing, he took a deep breath before talking, making sure his voice wouldn’t quiver when he started talking. 

‘My mother is going to sue my father, I just agreed to speak out in court against him.’ 

Without thinking about it, Mobius turned Loki towards him and gave him a big hug, which was immediately returned by the other boy, who sank into the embrace; grateful for the blond boy’s support and love that he had been over showered with during the few days. 

But he realized that it hadn’t just been one or two days, he realized that Mobius had been there for him for way longer than he had actually recognized; that from the first day the two had met, his life had ineffably changed for the better, the pasta they had made together, the jet skiing, Mobius introducing Loki to the friends he had made after one week whilst Loki had never made even one friend during all of his years at his highschool. 

Meeting up with said friends and spending time with them. Comforting him when there wasn’t anyone else to do so and driving over in the middle of the night just to go and take Loki somewhere else because the raven asked him to do so. 

He felt tears threatening to spill over as he hugged the other boy tighter.

Mobius noticed Loki’s tears and moved his hand to the other boy’s head, caressing the raven waves and he pressed his lips to his hair, then his forehead and his nose; he peppered Loki with kisses until the other boy was giggling from the contact. 

‘Thank you, Mobius, for everything.’ Loki smiled as he returned the kisses to the other boy. Mobius felt his face heat up and his heart beat faster.

He didn’t know how he had taken so long to realize what his feelings toward the other boy had been when he couldn’t remember feeling anything but this much adoration for him.

His stomach was doing somersaults and his mind felt like he had had one too many drinks, even though he was completely sober.

As Mobius wrapped his hands back around Loki’s neck to give him an actual kiss, the raven lost his balance, and with how he had been previously sitting, he was now lying back on the blond boy’s torso and he felt like his blissed out state would never fade away, at least not in the presence of the other boy. 

‘I really, really like you Loki, god, I don’t know how I could be so blind.’ He confessed and Loki chuckled, moving a strand of hair away from Mobius’s eyes as he sat back up. ‘

Don’t worry, I didn’t notice either, so I must have been just as blind as you.’ Loki answered and Mobius nodded, grinning.

He was happy for how things were turning out, maybe Loki’s father would finally face the judgement he deserved, maybe him and Loki could live a life free of such burdens, free of Odin’s abuse and free of the troubles the raven’s old bullies would face.

Mobius knew that their relationship would turn some heads, that it would make people judge and whisper; but they had friends that were completely open about it and that they would have at least their support so they wouldn’t have to feel completely alone in that situation. 

Mobius worried a lot about Loki, but like this maybe everything would turn out alright. 

Chapter Text

The court date arrives faster than anyone had thought it would, and soon enough, they were sitting in the courtroom, Loki having gotten an extra leave from the ward just to speak out against his father. There had been an excessive investigation on their side to secure all of the proof that Odin had actually done what he was being accused of.

Luckily, there were more than enough people who could speak out on how Loki had been treated, that included Mobius. Loki hadn’t wanted Mobius to be in court for this, didn’t want to risk him potentially being in danger if Odin got away and for some reason decided that Mobius was an enemy of him in some way.

The raven had thought about it for ages, but the blond boy had insisted to tell his truth in court, he had hugged Loki and had had peppered him in kisses, reassuring him that he would be safe and that he really wanted to do this for Loki. In the end, the raven had agreed, he knew that his attempts were futile; Loki couldn’t decide whether or not Mobius could speak out in court and he was pretty sure the other boy would have done so either way.

As Loki was picked up from the ward, he had gotten out some of his more fancy clothes, wanting to appear at least a bit put together and not the wreck he had actually been for the past few weeks. Therapy had helped, he noticed that,but in the end, he still fell asleep crying and still felt the urge to hurt himself.

That; luckily wasn’t as much of an option in the ward as it had been at home; his razor had been taken away, just like any other sharp objects.
He had still been allowed his phone, his therapist stating that the continued contact with outside people like his boyfriend and family was important.
The others, Sylvie, Hunter, OB, Ravonna and Casey had also visited him twice in the following week. He had given Sylvie the letter he had written for them all the first time she had come around by herself; a day after that all five of them had huddled into Loki and Peter's room and had talked with him for hours, it had made the raven feel less lonely, more like he still had some sort of contact to other people outside of his family. 

Pietro and Wanda had come by on Tuesday and he had talked to them about what had happened, Wanda had given him a big hug and Pietro had brought some food for him, which he shared with Peter, who enthusiastically talked with Peter about some Physics things they both seemed interested in.

‘So, how are you holding up?’ Wanda had asked, his eyebrows furrowed as she sat down next to the raven on his mattress. ‘Well, therapy is going well, I quite like the therapist I’ve been put with, I think that definitely helps.’ Wanda nodded, when they had arrived, Wanda had told him a little about her previous stay at the same ward; it hadn’t been under the same circumstances and she had been on a different station, but it had given Loki some more hope, hope, that when he was out of here, he could live a completely normal life, much how Wanda was able to lead hers now.

‘That’s always good, I’m glad you get along with her well.’ Loki nodded, he knew he wouldn’t be better from one day to another, but he had secretly hoped to be a bit faster with healing. He knew just how much his stay at the ward was affecting everyone else in his social circle, and he hadn’t thought about failing his attempt when he had made the plan. But to be fair, he hadn’t really had a social circle at all when he had planned his death.

‘I want to get out of here as fast as I can, I’m not sure I want to waste my time now that I know how much I have to live for.’
He meant it when he said that, he still wanted to hurt himself at times of the day, still felt like crying every time Mobius kissed him because it felt so unreal he didn’t even know why, or how he deserved something like this.

He asked Mobius almost every single time the blond boy admitted his feelings for Loki, even though the raven had already heard them almost a million times by now. He asked if Mobius really meant it; and every single time without fail would the other boy nod, answer with an ‘Of course I mean it’ and Loki would feel himself fall further for the other boy because it felt so surreal to actually have this. 

But in the end, even though Loki was so, so far away from being better and feeling better, he didn’t want to die anymore. He felt like he had enough to live for now. A life without his father, friends who cared about him and a loving boyfriend who looked at him like he hung the moon even when Loki himself was at his lowest and felt like he could cry because of how bad everything seemed to him and how much he thought everything was falling apart around him. 

Wanda gave him a hug and nodded. ‘I get what you mean, I’m just glad you know what to live for and I’m glad you want to get better too.’

Wanda’s smile had kept Loki going for the rest of the day and when Mobius had come around on Wednesday, he had told Mobius just how badly he wanted to get better and how much he wished for them to be there for each other. Mobius had responded by giving the raven a loving kiss and had told him how he would always be there for him and how the raven could call Mobius whenever he felt like it.

And now, as Mobius took Loki’s hand and helped him get out of the car, Loki knew that the blond boy had meant it. The raven’s face was blank, his mind almost blank with what was about to happen.

The courthouse in front of them seemed to be towering above them in a way that would physically be impossible. Loki felt the need to run away from it before it all came crashing down on him.

When Mobius squeezed his hand, Loki felt grounded again, suddenly, the building seemed less threatening and he didn’t feel like running anymore. The blond boy looked up into the raven’s eyes and smiled at him. His eyes conveying more words than he felt were possible.

‘It’s going to be okay, Loki, trust me.’
And Loki nodded as they walked towards the building.

The whole court process was a flash in Loki’s memory, his mind barely registered when he was called up by the judge. 

‘Loki Odinson.’ Was called, and Mobius nudged the raven’s side and Loki shot up, walking over to the booth; he was just glad his father had been removed from this hearing. 

‘Yes, attending.’ He said into the mic in front of him as he sat down.
‘Okay, so, as stated, Loki Odinson is the most affected person by the crimes his father, Odin Borson has commited.’

The lawyer continued to speak, asking Loki to answer questions every now and then, which he tried to answer as neutrally as he could; it hurt, to bear his emotions and his treatments so open in front of so many people he cared about deeply. 

He hated feeling vulnerable in front of them, hated them knowing how it had affected him all these years and what had happened to him in such detail. But every time he felt unsure, he looked back at Mobius, who would smile and give him a strengthening look and Loki would continue talking about what had happened. It took hours until everything was listed off. 

Loki had cried multiple times after he had spoken, including the time where his father’s lawyer had suggested that Loki might just be attention seeking. Frigga had looked so mad when she heard that, and Mobius had hugged the raven tight to his chest, making sure Loki knew how much support he would have, no matter what decision the judge came to at the end.

It had been a few exhausting hours, everyone felt tired as the judge came back into the court, laying down her papers on the desk she was sitting behind. Loki felt his breath hitch as he saw Odin being brought in too, sitting down in a booth at the front of the audience. Loki couldn’t see his face whilst being sat behind his father, but he was sure the man was smiling. Even whilst delivering his point of view, which had been a bunch of lies mixed together to paint Loki as the worst kind of person there ever was, he had been smiling. 

A deafening silence fell over the courtroom as the judge took the papers from the desk and stood up.
‘It has been a long day, and I am sure everyone just wants to go home, so I have thought about my verdict.’ Loki pressed himself harder to Mobius’s side and the blond boy soothed him by weaving his hands though the other boy’s hair. 

‘I hereby declare Odin Borson as guilty of child abuse and domestic violence.’
Loki audibly breathed in sharply, his heart beating faster than he had ever felt it and he could feel the tears spilling from his eyes not even a second later. Odin was guilty, he was found guilty of what he had done to Loki. Mobius felt a stone drop from his heart that had been forming during the entire trial.

Odin would pay for what he had done to such a beautiful and amazing person who had so much love to give, but had received so little growing up.
Odin visibly tensed from the back, even Loki could see that this wasn’t what he had thought would come out at the end of this trial. 

Odin and his lawyer had made up a story, painting Loki as a mentally ill person who was just desperate for attention, they had taken Loki’s current stay at the psych ward as proof and they had augmented this with the fact that Odin was a majorly successful business person and had never had that much time for his son. 

But now, Odin realized that he had actually been held accountable for what he had done to his son and he turned to his lawyer, rage coursing through his veins as the judge went on to declare her sentencing.

‘As being charged guilty, in the state of Texas, I hereby sentence Odin Borson to forty years in prison without parole and damages to be paid to the victim in the amount of 50,000$.’

At the judge's words, even Loki gasped, he knew that Odin would go to prison for at least a few years,but fourty? The man was already in his late fifties, who would know if he ever got out before he died. But even if for his father it was a terrible fate, Loki couldn’t help but feel happy and relieved. He didn’t care about the money Odin had to pay him, he only cared that he finally got his life back.

Mobius gave him a big hug from the side, Loki wanted nothing more than to kiss him right now; but Odin had made it his business to stare at his son with the angriest look the raven had ever seen on his father, so he just settled on a hug; for now.

The next person to hug him was his mother, who embraced her son and soon after Thor joined in. ‘It’s all going to be okay Loki.’ Frigga said and the raven nodded, tears streaking down his face as everyone calmed down again, the judge still having some stuff to say about it.

‘The court has decided that the entire property will go over to Mr Borson’s wife, the company leadership will be given to the next in line for leadership within the company, but the rest of the close family will still get their shares paid.’

Frigga let out some more tears as she heard the news; Odin had always made a lot of money and getting the property plus shares in the company each month meant that her job would be more than enough to support herself, Loki and even put some aside just in case Thor ever needed any money whilst being at university.

She felt like suddenly, all of her worries were no longer worries; she had thought about their financial situation a lot; what if she wouldn’t be able to support herself and Loki during the next few years?

Loki wasn’t in the best state at the moment and even the bills for his psych ward stay would have to be paid and those weren’t cheap.

But now, now she had the reassurance that money would not be a problem and she could not thank the judge enough, even as Odin stood up from his chair dramatically  and started yelling across the courtroom how unfair it all was, how he built up all of that money and ‘a few hits’ were not worth losing all of that.

The judge however didn’t care much and soon signaled for two of the guards that had been standing by the door to take the raging man away and ready him for transport. 

Loki, who had been sitting numbly in his seat finally got some feeling back into his fingers, the weight of the situation falling down on him like heavy waves in the ocean.

He looked up at Mobius with teary eyes as the blond boy looked at him a little concerned, but all Loki could do was smile at the blond boy, not even just smile, he beamed at Mobius, beamed because he was the happiest he had been in a long time and also smile because how could he not? 

The man he had been dreading for years and years was finally behind bars and wouldn’t see Loki for the next four decades. Loki smiled and grinned and beamed, even when he pulled Mobius down into a kiss and didn’t care about what anyone’s reaction might be, he smiled through their kiss because he was free. 

Chapter Text

Th e days after the court date seemed like a dream to Loki, they passed so fast and even whilst he was in the psych ward, his therapist told him multiple times how he seemed a lot more willing to get better and more motivated; when asked why Loki thought his mood had suddenly changed so much, he immediately knew that it had to do with Odin being finally put in prison.

Loki knew that even whilst he had wanted to get better before, he had still dreaded the outside world because Odin was still in it; he had dreaded going back after working so hard for himself to get better only to have Odin erase all of that once more. But now he knew that once he was out of here, he would be able to continue to live on without his father coming in the way of that, without a person so against his recovery.

Four days after the court date had ended, Frigga came to see Loki once more and whilst she usually just talked to him even if Peter was in the room, this time she beckoned him outside. Loki just followed her, an uneasy feeling spreading in his abdomen. Nothing good had ever really come of a talk like this, had it? What was she going to say? But Frigga just sat him down on a bench in the hallway and took his hands in her own. 

‘Okay, Loki, so me and Thor have been thinking about what to do next, and we aren’t sure completely yet so we wanted to ask you too.’ The raven just nodded along, he didn’t know what this could possibly be about, but he was sure he would find out soon.

‘But I’ve talked to Thor about this and we thought maybe it would make more sense to sell the house, there are so many bad memories back there and honestly I don’t need that much space to live, especially if we’re only going to live together once he’s actually off to uni.’

Frigga said and Loki couldn’t believe what he heard in the first second, of course, he would sell the house in an instant, he would much rather live somewhere more cozy and away from his childhood home which had done nothing but harm him; but his mother and Thor also agreeing that it would be better to sell?

He couldn’t nood fast enough.
‘Yeah, mom, I think that might be a good idea, once I’m out I can help look for an apartment and we can move in together if you want to.’ The raven hastily added but Frigga shook her head, smiling at her son.

‘No need to stress like that, Thor and I already looked at some apartments and I just wanted to confirm with you that moving would be okay. We’ve already looked at some apartments and we’ve already settled on a favorite of ours, I think you’ll like it too.’

She beamed up at him and Loki swallowed, moving away from his old home would be a big change, even if it was one he was dying to make, it would still cost him a lot of strength and it probably wouldn’t be as easy to adjust to wherever they were to move soon.
‘Is it still somewhere around where we used to live or are we moving somewhere completely different?’

Loki asked, the dread sneaking up on him like an early morning fog, encapsulating his limbs before creeping into his chest and around his heart. ‘Oh, no, it’s around twenty minutes from where we used to live, but you won’t have to change schools or anything, in fact, I’m sure you’ll get used to it really quickly.’

She gave him a knowing smile and he wanted to ask her what she meant by that, but held back his questions when Frigga pulled out her phone, going to show him some photos; it looked like a really nice apartment, with three bedrooms and a big kitchen, some storage space and a big Window front in a few of the rooms. Frigga swiped through the photos and told him what would most likely be his room and what would be Thor’s and hers. Loki thought all of the rooms looked gorgeous and he told her how much he was going to love it there.

The following week passed slow, too slow for the ravens liking, but with his newfound motivation he was becoming a lot more successful with his tasks and things he was assigned to do by his therapist, like writing in a journal and keeping a close eye on how he was feeling towards himself; he found that while some days he couldn’t really stand the sight of himself and felt like lying in bed all day even when Mobius came by to visit him, most days now were happier and he felt like actually doing things; the blond had started bringing him some books every now and then and he really started picking up reading again, alongside drawing, which he had abandoned at some point when he had felt worse for wear.

Today was one of those days, it was now three weeks after the court date and Frigga had just informed him that all of their stuff had been moved into the new apartment just yesterday; his boxes still neatly stacked inside of his room so he would be able to decorate it himself when he came back home, which, if he trusted Dr.Hela wouldn’t be that far away at all, hell, she had said if he continued like he was at the moment, he might be allowed back by next week.

The weather was nice outside today, and Loki and Peter had decided to just spend their free time in their room painting; the other boy had recently picked up creating cartoons and had become quite attached to an OC he had created of a spider like superhero. Loki had found the idea of creating a story around a character very appealing, so he had helped Peter out when he asked for opinions about the superhero character.

‘Oh, Loki, what do you think of this, he doesn’t get his powers in a medical experiment, how about he gets bit by a spider instead?! Maybe like a radioactive one!!’ Peter exclaimed, arms flailing around him as he pitched his idea to the raven. Loki actually quite liked that Idea and nodded in response to Peter. ‘I think that actually sounds really cool, it’s a lot more unique than some other stuff I’ve read, definitely an eye catcher!’ Peter grinned and quickly wrote down the idea, not wanting to lose it. 

‘You know, I’m really going to miss you once I’m outta here, I mean, I’ve only got one week left, but I’m definitely going to visit you man.’ Peter said and sighed. Loki knew how he must feel, on one side, Peter was happy he was finally feeling well enough to get out of here again, the younger boy had definitely had his fair share of bad days while the two had been sharing a room too; sometimes it was the horrible nightmares, sometimes it was relapses and other times just complete and utter apathy.

But, much like Loki had been improving, so had the other boy and a week ago he had been cleared for discharge; at first it had been uncertain where the boy should go, but it was quickly decided that he would stay with his uncle Happy, who had been the husband to his late aunt.

‘You know we can always keep in touch after this, I think it might actually help a bit to maybe keep up with each other, we’ve lived together for over a month now and I have your number already so that won’t be a problem!’ The raven smiled just as the sun shone through the window and onto their shared desk. Peter nodded hastily.

‘I would love to, I’m really glad I got to have a roomie like you here, I mean, it did help me to have you here too some days.’
It made Loki smile when he heard that, it was one thing to be a good friend to someone, it was another to know you actually helped that friend through some times. 

The two of them continued to work on their respective works before Loki checked his watch. ‘I’m off now, Mobius is going to be waiting for me if I leave any later.’

The raven quickly threw on some more presentable clothes and headed for the door, waving a goodbye to Peter who threw back a grin and wriggled with his eyebrows. Loki responded with a middle finger.

Mobius was already waiting for him when Loki arrived in the foyer; ever since two weeks ago the raven had been allowed to walk around the grounds unsupervised and Mobius and him had taken that to get some alone time; it had been like going on actual dates.
‘Hey Lokes.' Mobius smiled coyly and took Loki's hands in his, lifting them up and kissing them like they always did in old romantic movies.

Loki felt himself blush slightly as the blond lifted his face again and looked him in the eyes. ‘Hey Mobius, how have you been?’ He asked and pulled him in for a short hug before letting him go as they started to go outside, walking into the lovely park the psych ward had connected directly behind it.

‘I’ve been good.’ Mobius smiled and Loki didn’t miss the kind of giddiness he could sense on the other boy. 'Real good.’ The blond added and Loki felt a playful smirk brush across his face. ‘Yeah, what is it that’s made you jump around like a toddler?’ He grinned and now it was the other boy’s turn to blush at the words that came from Loki’s mouth. 

‘It’s a secret, I’m not allowed to tell you yet Lokes, it’ll ruin the surprise.’ Even though Loki didn’t know what he looked like he felt the frown spreading across his forehead. ‘What do you mean, surprise?’ He asked skeptically, but all the other boy gave him was a big grin and a shrug. Loki knew that at this point, pushing any further wouldn’t really get him anywhere, so he just decided on ignoring it for now, he was bound to find out sooner or later anyways. 

As they continued their walk, they eventually sat down on a bench near a pond where they had spent a lot of their time together as of late. Mobius had, as always, brought some food, usually from the nice little bakery just down his street and this time he also had.
‘I thought you might like these, I thought they looked kind of silly but they reminded me of you.’

Mobius grinned as he held the pastry towards his boyfriend, in his hand was a small pastry made from bun dough, but in the shape of a small snake, completed with little eyes and even a small tongue. 

‘Aww, this is adorable, Mobius, I love it.’ He said and leaned over to give the blond a kiss, which was promptly returned by his boyfriend who only pulled away after a few moments to actually give the pastry to the raven.

They shared a few other pastries the blond had brought and in the end their time was up faster than they thought it would be, but by now they had realized that it would most likely always be like this, so it didn’t really come as a shock to them when Mobius checked his phone and it was already almost time for him to leave again.

They walked back to the entrance hand in hand and talked about random things, like how they would like to take a trip together once Loki was out again, maybe in Mobius’s truck and camp out in the desert, watching the stars and falling asleep together late into the night.
They talked about how Loki really wanted to get some more plants to end after he moved back in with his mom simply because as he had realized in therapy, it gave him a sense of responsibility and he would have a better feeling for caring about himself if he did so with some plants at the same time. 

Even when the arrived back inside of the building and Mobius brought Loki back to his room, saying goodbye to Peter too and giving Loki a kiss that lasted a little long for a goodbye kiss, all Loki could think about was his life once he got out of here, he would miss it a bit, but in the end, everything he was currently looking forward to were things outside of the ward.

More time with his family, dinner dates with Mobius, going to the cinema or actually just going back to school, he wanted all of that back, and deep inside he was more than glad that he had found a joy in living again, a joy in living things and in things he could only do whilst living.

At this point, he couldn’t believe he ever felt like he had to die to get better, he couldn’t believe he would have left everything behind just to avoid some of his problems and feel ‘better’ when it very clearly would have just taken away from him.
Mornings came and went and before he knew it, his therapist had decided with him that he would officially be discharged by Monday of the next week, only three days after Peter would be discharged too.

Loki was so happy he felt like he could burst any second now and Mobius seemed equally as excited when Loki told him he would be going home on Monday.

Saying goodbye to Peter on Friday was hard, but Loki knew the two were going to stay in touch and the brunette even came to visit him one last time on Sunday and together with Mobius helped him pack his stuff ready to go.

His entire room was bare by the time they were done and whilst Loki kind of missed the nicely decorated space, he knew he wouldn’t miss this place at all and would be happy to never set foot inside of this facility ever again.

On Monday morning, the first person to greet him was Thor; his big brother had been so busy with all of his pre work for Uni that there hadn’t been more than one visit from him a week; which had upset Loki a little at first, but he couldn’t find it in himself to be mad at Thor when his brother held no blame for being busy.

After that came his mom and also Mobius, who had come with a pretty bouquet of flowers, which he revealed were all hand picked by himself as he handed it over to Loki and gave him a big hug followed by a kiss that was very eagerly reciprocated.
‘Okay, let’s get going then.’

Thor said as he hauled Loki’s suitcase in the air and towards the car. Soon everyone was seated and they started driving. It was only then that Loki realized he didn’t actually know where he would be living from now on, he only knew it was a skyscraper and also that it was around twenty minutes from their previous home. 

While they were driving he looked around and at some point started recognizing some of the buildings, but he just couldn’t quite place them.

 After a few more minutes they pulled up to a tall building and only when they were starting to walk up to it did Loki realize where they were headed.

‘Wait, is this a joke??’