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For as long as Tim could remember, the darkness was there. Even when it was bright and sunny outside, a rarity in Gotham, there was still darkness. But not actual darkness that make it hard to see and makes one fumble around for the flashlight setting on their phone. This darkness was invisible to everyone but Tim. And even to Tim, the darkness was only in one place. His head. The darkness in his head was all-consuming and constant. Which made slipping out of the house into the darkness of Gotham at night anything but scary. When you face an invisible darkness all day long, the real darkness of the night is almost comforting because everyone knows that come morning, the darkness will be gone. Tim wished that his head was like that. For a few hours it was dark and a few hours it was light, but Tim was not that lucky. The darkness never turned into light inside the mind of Tim Drake.
When Bruce begrudgingly made him Robin, he asked if Tim had any mental health disorders he should know about along with any physical disabilities, Tim shook his head. The darkness was normal to him and eventually, he just assumed that everyone had some darkness that followed them around and they were just better at ignoring it. It wasn’t until after Tim overheard a conversation between Bruce and Dick that he realized that the darkness was not normal. When he heard Bruce sob into his eldest’s arms about the loss of his youngest and wail about the now ever-present darkness that wouldn’t go away. But there was nothing Tim could do to make the darkness go away. If he brought it up with his parents, they would call him crazy and ship him back off to boarding school. Bruce wouldn't care, too busy dealing with his own darkness. Dick or Alfred might help, but he doesn't want to force the darkness onto them.
When Jason came and beat him to a pulp in Titan Tower, the darkness got darker. When Damian showed up and made his opinions on Tim’s presence known, the darkness got bigger. And when Kon, Bart, Steph, his parents and Bruce all died, the darkness became all-consuming. Instead of focusing on the darkness, Tim threw himself away from the dark cloud and focused instead on proving to both himself and his so-called family that at least one of the people he recently lost was not actually lost. The darkness took pleasure in reminding him of just how alone he actually was. And when Tim got hurt and bled all over the desert sand, the darkness hummed with pleasure at the pain and backed off for the first time in years. Tim soon learned that the darkness loved it when Tim was in pain. So in order to keep the darkness away, Tim smuggled a blade away from the League of Assassins while he was busy rescuing Tam Fox and blowing up Ra's bases. And once the rubble had settled, Tim had reassured Dick that he didn’t mean to let himself get kicked out of a window, it was just an accident. And Tim presented his findings to the Justice League so they could take over looking for Bruce, Tim sat down and let the darkness overwhelm him. The knife that he had taken earlier sat heavy in his hand as he sobbed in his lonely unfurnished apartment in the middle of Crime Alley. When the darkness became too much, Tim made thick slices along his arms and eventually his legs and torso when he ran out of room on his arms. Eventually, Tim lost track of time and stood up to clean up the puddles of blood forming around him when he started to feel weird. The darkness that was normally just in the back of his head was clouding his vision, making it hard to see and causing him to trip over whatever loose articles of clothing or boxes were on the ground.
‘Oh,’ Tim realized. ‘I’m going to pass out now.’ and pass out he did. Tim felt the ground move closer and suddenly he was face to face with the hardwood floor. As Tim blearily blinked and looked around at the damage, he began to realize that he was going to die. ‘At least I can die without a crowd. And Bruce no longer needs me. The Justice League will rescue him and he has Jason and Damian now. At least I could enjoy it while it lasted.’ And the darkness overtook Tim for the last time.
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Somewhere in Smallville, Kon was recovering from being ‘dead’ and then suddenly alive again. Ma was stuffing him full of food insisting that he lost too much weight while he was gone. Bart was over every day with Cassie to eat their fill as Ma finally enjoyed making enough food to feed an army. As the teen relaxed and listened to Cassie tell them about everything that had gone on, Kon sat up in alarm. The other two teens looked at him and questioned what was the problem.
“It’s Tim. His heart is slowing down and his breathing is super shallow and wheezy.” Cassie and Bart looked at each other with worry and ran to their rooms to get suited up. While they did that, Kon focussed on locating where Tim was exactly. He knew that it would take him a while to get wherever it is that Tim was since he was only half Kryptonian, but Superman was up at the watchtower helping Bruce get back to normal life. He found Tim and started to fly off, knowing that Cassie and Bart would follow.
The three ran and flew as fast as they could but it still took several precious minutes they could not spare. When they got to where Kon had pinpointed Tim’s fading heartbeat, the group barged into the apartment and followed the blood trail to the kitchen where they found the small teen laying on the ground covered in cuts and blood.
“TIM!” The three screamed and pushed down the boy wonder’s side to see what they could do.
Kon took point and rolled over Tim onto his back after checking to make sure that there was no spinal injury. “Cassie, call your aunt and get her to turn on the boom tubes to the watchtower. Bart, you look for any medical supplies or towels that we can use to stop the bleeding and then see if you can find whatever weapon did this.”
“What do you mean what weapon did this? We need to find whoever did this.” Bart protested as Cassie stepped off the side to call Wonder Woman.
Kon shook his head. “These were self-inflicted. They are too straight and even to be anything else. Now go!” Bart ran off and dropped off a pile of bedsheets a moment later. Kon did his best to use the sheets but TIm was bleeding too quickly.
Cassie ran in and ordered Kon to pick up Tim and go to the roof so they could accurately send the boom tube to them. Kon did as he was told and Bart followed along with a bloody knife. Once they were on the roof, Cassie gave Wonder Woman the signal, and a bright light surrounded the group and within seconds, the four teens were in the watchtower. Wonder Woman was waiting nearby, not fully aware of the situation, but once she saw the blood and Tim in Kon’s arms she called for medics and rushed forward to help the panicking teens save their friend.
Medics rushed forward and pulled Tim away from the group and began to put pressure on the wounds. Once they had a Pulse monitor on the pale teen, and confirmed that he was still alive, the medics rushed Tim on a gurney to medical. They also passed where Bruce was recuperating with his family.
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Bruce was back. He was with his family and safe. Damian was curled into his side and Dick was sitting on the bed with him, Jason standing next to him while Alfred watched over the group. Bruce wished that his second youngest was with the group but according to his other sons, they hadn’t seen Tim for several days and before that months. They reassured Bruce that he would show up eventually, he was probably just busy. While the family talked and caught up on what Bruce missed, medical staff began to run past the room with a bleeding figure on the gurney. As they passed Bruce caught a glimpse of messy black hair and porcelain skin.
“Tim.” Bruce gasped as he tried to sit up and go after the medics. His three boys looked out the window at the passing gurney and saw the same thing. Dick got up and promised to find out what was happening, as long as Bruce remained in bed. After getting Bruce’s promise, Dick slipped out of the room and followed the medics until they turned into the trauma room. Big Brother instincts took over and Dick tried to get into the room but was stopped by Clark.
“Dickie, you can’t go in there right now ok?”
“Uncle Clark, I promised B I would check. He thinks that the person in there is Tim.” Clark sighed and let go of his nephew. He pressed a button that turned off the blackout screen in the window, allowing people to look in. And there on the gurney, writhing in pain, screaming and crying as loud as his battered throat would go, was Tim. Dick felt his legs go weak and Clark caught him and lowered the both of them to the ground. “What happened?” Dick demanded to know.
“Tim…Tim hurt himself. Those cuts are all his doing. They are too precise and calculated to be torture. Kon, Bart, and Cassie brought him here. And we aren’t going to completely rule out torture, but since all signs lead to self-harm, we have to keep him here for a minimum of 144 hours. Six days, no negotiations. And don't look so shocked over the time, you know Bruce set up the suicide watch time to be longer for bats after his breakdown. Right now, we just have to focus on getting Tim better.”
Clark went with Dick to tell Bruce. They were all shocked and heartbroken. Over Tim’s time away, Damian had learned just how cruel he was and had intended to apologize sincerely. Dick had worked to make amends with Jason and the three brothers often did things together and waited impatiently for Tim to resurface so their family could become complete.
Over the next few hours, the medics worked tirelessly to save Tim and almost lost him when his heart gave out and his breathing became too weak. They were forced to intubate and bring Tim back to life and pray that they managed to keep him alive. Luckily, Tim survived twenty-four hours and was on track to recover. After the medics deemed it clear, Bruce insisted on having sitting with Tim constantly. And for seven days, there was always someone with Tim. After Bruce was discharged, he too insisted on staying with Tim. After day three, they removed his breathing tube, letting Tim breathe on his own.
Tim’s friends stuck around until their mentors forced them to go home to rest. But they still visited when they could.
It was Jason’s turn to sit with Tim when the boy woke up. Jason had been sitting with the boy, reading through Jane Austen out loud when he took a break and looked at the kid he was in charge of watching over. He thought back to when he first met Tim when they were little. They were at a gala when the power went out. Tim had been hanging out with Jason that evening and when the lights went out, the kid just looked around and stood still. He looked up at the skylight and smiled at the stars. When Jason asked if he was scared of the dark later, he insisted that he was not afraid fo the dark. That the dark wasn’t even scary unless you let it become scary. Then Jason thought of all the times that Tim seemed to get lost in his own head and let himself be pushed around by rouges and villains. All the times that Tim would come to breakfast with red puffy eyes and no one would say anything. Or when Tim would let the harsh words and emotionally abuse just attack him, not bothering to stand up for himself.
“Oh Babybird, no wonder you’re not afraid of the dark. Nothing outside your head could be as scary as whats inside it.” Jason leaned forward and rubbed one of the new forming scars on Tim’s wrists. “I promise that we will be better.”
Jason sat up when he felt the muscles twitch in Tim’s wrist and the small teen started to stir. Jason pushed the button for a nurse and helped Tim wake up gently. “Easy kiddo. You lost a lot of blood, but you’re ok.” As Tim looked around, he looked past Jason and sighed disappointedly.
“Oh. You’re still here.” Jason turned around and saw nothing, but whatever Tim saw made him pale and pass back out.
The medics rushed in and Jason relayed what had happened. They confirmed that that was a good thing and left to call the rest of the Waynes so they could come join Jason in waiting by Tim’s bedside. Within the next few hours, Jason waited for Tim to wake back up and enjoyed the company of his family. After nearly four more hours of waiting, and several card games that were played on Tim’s lap, the group’s game was interrupted when Tim started to stir. The boys all looked up to see Tim’s pale face turned towards them, his blue eyes still glassy with pain looked at the brothers gathered around and brightened. Without hesitating, Jason shot up from his chair and helped Tim sit up so he could see better. Jason raised the bed and brushed Tim’s sweaty, greasy bangs out from his face as he whispered reassurances to the teen. Alfred had rushed out to get the medics and were back just in time to pull the oxygen mask off of Tim before the teenager expelled the very little that was in his stomach.
That was the moment they realized that one of Tim’s cuts had become infected. It was roughly fifteen minutes later that they learned that Tim didn’t have a spleen. It was less than a minute after that, that the medics started to pump heavy duty antibiotics into Tim’s body in order to fight the infection. The medics tried to give Tim a sedative but bat resistance training and the amount of sedatives he had had the last few days made Tim simply groggy, not sleepy.
So since Tim was awake and looking more and more like a lost puppy every time he so much as glanced at Bruce, the family decided to stay and keep Tim company. But Bruce noticed that there was something off about Tim. Every few minutes he would stare off into space and start to tremble and shake with fear before one of the Wayne’s managed to snap him out of his daze. After the fifth time of having to bring Tim out from his head, Bruce wanted to know what it was he was seeing.
“Darkness.” Was all the shaking teen said before going mute and spacing out. Bruce thought back to when Tim first became Robin. He was not a good mentor, let alone father, but he did notice that Tim craved validation and seemed to sometimes get lost to his thoughts.
After a few days of strong antibiotics and Alfred’s meals, Tim was doing better physically. Mentally was another story. Bruce allowed Dinah Lance to talk to Tim and see if she could understand what the darkness was. The part time psychologist, part time hero, came to the conclusion that the darkness was Tim’s depression, anxiety and every bad thing that he thought about himself, manifested into a form that Tim’s mind could comprehend. She estimated that the darkness started around age five and from there it just got bigger and stronger.
She agreed with the medics that Tim was not yet ready to go home. He needed to stay at the tower under suicide watch for six days since now that he was healed physically, he might try again to hurt himself. It was the most painful thing Bruce had to do was sign the papers saying that he agreed to let Dina and the medics watch over Tim and help him to the best of their abilities. He also agreed to let her start Tim on a semi low dose of anti depressants and anti psychotics since he honestly believed that the darkness was a real thing. Bruce watched as the medics got Tim ready for transport to the psych ward in Gotham General Hospital which is where he asked to have Tim stay. Not because it was close to home, but because he knew that with all the crazy shit that Gotham went through, Tim would have a hell of a time trying to escape from a Gotham psych ward compared to the Justice League one.
Bruce watched from a one way window as the medics and Dina got Tim dressed in to plain grey sweats and a t shirt with no strings, shoes and slip on shoes. Because Tim was a bat and able to escape anything, it was decided that Tim would be put unconscious for his transportation. Tim, who was not excited about being committed in the first place, put up a fight and the medics had to evacuate until Jason managed to rush in and pin Tim down long enough for Dinah to inject Tim with a heavy duty sedative. After Tim fell asleep against Jason, the medics brought in the gurney and Jason lifted Jason onto the bed. The group strapped Tim to the bed with foam cuffs and buckles so he had no way to escape if he happened to wake up. After everything was ready, the medics, Dinah and the Waynes went with Tim to GCGH.
The first two days, Tim refused to talk to anyone. He didn’t talk to Dinah, to Jason, Bruce, Damian, Dick, or even Alfred.
On Day three Tim opened up to Dinah, realizing that the longer he held out the longer he stayed in the psych ward. Tim also chatted a bit with Alfred over the phone.
Day four, Tim closed himself off again. Dinah found him trying to cut at his wrists with the prongs on a fork. They had to sedate him and isolate him so he didn’t harm himself or others. They also started the six day counter over giving Tim twelve days in the psych ward.
Days five and six, Tim dissociated hard. He wouldn’t respond to anyone. It wasn’t until Damian was given permission to bring Ace to the hospital to comfort Tim that the teen snapped out of his state and begged to see his family.
Days seven, Tim sat with Bruce in his little room as he told him everything that he had gone through the last few years. Bruce listened and sat on the dirty floor of the padded room with Tim and hugged his son.
Day eight had Tim starting to take his new medications.
Day nine he felt the side effects and was so emotional that Ace was brought back in to comfort Tim.
Day ten, Dinah suggested getting Tim a therapy dog of his own due to how well he responded to Ace. Bruce instantly started to look into it. Tim was also informed that he would be moving back into the Manor until they knew he was safe again. Tim just nodded and told Bruce how to get into his apartment.
Day eleven, Tim had a panic attack over going back to the manor, unsure of what to expect after being gone for so long. Since Bruce was stuck in a meeting, Dick, Jason, and Damian all came and visited Tim and brought along a mountain of games. While the group played game after game, they encouraged Tim to have fun and in the end, when Tim started crying, begging to know why they were being so nice to him, they comforted their brother. Tim, still in denial, shook his head and cried, arguing that they were just being nice so they didn’t kill himself. Dick, ever the emotional genius in the family, hugged Tim and pinned him to his chest when the teen started to trash and tear at his hair in anger. The boys just sat there, hugging Tim and comforting him for the next few hours until Leslie came back to check on Tim and had to kick the boys out, promising that they could see Tim in the morning for his release. After one last hug, the boys left, leaving Tim under Leslie’s watchful eyes.
Day twelve brought a rare sunny day to Gotham. Bruce drove his most inconspicuous car to Gotham General Hospital, his three boys with him, waiting to pick up their fourth. Alfred decided to remain at home in order to make Tim’s room ready and prepare lunch. As the four filed out of the car and into the hospital, there was a sense of joy and excitement in the air. As they reached the psych ward, they saw a familiar mop of black hair sitting on one of the hard plastic chairs outside of the checkpoint with Leslie. The teens wrists were bandaged and even though it was obvious that Tim had regained some of his lost weight, he was still way to skinny. His cheeks were still protruding sharply, and his collarbone was sharp and obvious. There was also a yellow hospital bracelet on Tim’s wrist. The band marked him as a flight risk and at risk of suicide and infection with his immunocompromised behavior. They were working on getting Tim a permanent medical band that warned people of his missing spleen in case anything ever happened.
When Tim heard the group approaching, he looked up and hesitantly smiled. Dick lead the may in running towards his little brother. Jason and Damian followed behind within just a few seconds of seeing Dick take off. After catching up to Tim, the four boys dissolved into a pile of hugs. Tim, overwhelmed from the emotion and embracing started to shake and hug the group back with shaking hands.
After a few minutes, Tim pulled back and looked at the three boys and reached up to touch his face. He laughed timidly and looked down. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why i'm crying.”
“Shut up Babybird and just accept the love.” Jason said firmly. He then proceeded to scoop up the skinny teen and lead the way down to the car. Damian carried Tim’s small backpack with his meager belongings that he was brought in with. Dick just followed along, talking to Tim about anything and everything he deemed important to help Tim stay out of his head. Eventually Tim leaned into Jason’s arms and was mesmerized by the feeling of his big brothers callused fingers running through his long, greasy hair.
When Tim woke up the next time, he was in Wayne manor. Specifically the theater room with the rest of the family. Toy Story was almost finished on the giant screen and Tim watched Woody and Buzz chase after the moving van with ease. Eventually the movie finished and Tim sat up and looked around. Everyone was there.
“Good morning sweetheart. Would you like something to eat? Leslie gave me your medications and said you need to take your antibiotics with food.” Tim nodded in a daze and within moments, a plate of food was settled onto his lap. He ate about half the plate before pushing it away, his stomach full. Bruce smiled understandably and handed him a white pill and a yellow pile. An antibiotic and an antidepressant. Tim swallowed them dry, wincing at the chalking feeling in his mouth.
Tim drifted back off to sleep and woke up in his bed. Glancing at his clock he realized that it was roughly one in the morning. He pushed back the blankets and got up to walk through the halls like he used to do when he was younger and all alone and lonely in Drake Manor. Without realizing it, Tim ended up in the kitchen where he was greeted with Jason and Dick having a cup of coffee.
The two boys noticed Tim and smiled at him. “`Mornin’ sleeping beauty. Take a seat.” Jason kicked out a chair and motioned for Tim to join them. As Tim walked over he realized that Dick’s eyes were red and swollen. He had been crying and if Tim had to guess, it was all his fault. After being passed a cup, Tim took a sip and made a face at the realization that the brown drink in front of him was not coffee with milk, but hot coco. A drink that was reserved for special family nights. Something that Tim never experienced as Robin.
Jason, noticing Tim’s face, laughed at his surprise. “You honestly thought we were drinking coffee this early in the morning? No babybird. I made coco once I found big bird here moping and sobbing his eyes out in my room not to long ago. My intent is to get dear big brother of mine back to sleep not keep him up. And I know the coco isn’t as good as Alfred’s, but I hope it is still ok.”
“I have never had Alfred’s coco.” Tim told his older brothers as simply as if he was telling them the grass was green.
Jason snorted. “Bullshit. Nice try, but no one is Robin for almost three years and never has his coco.” He started to laugh again and then noticed the uneasy look on Dick and Tim’s faces. “Wait. You’re not shitting me? Timbo has never had Alfie’s coco? Why?!”
Dick shifted uneasily and looked up sheepishly as Jason. “Well when Tim was Robin, no one was in a good place. Alfred was sad and depressed, trying to keep Bruce from falling apart. I was primarily in `Haven. And Bruce was not the man you once knew. The few times I was here, I had to stop Bruce from turning training into abuse. He was falling apart at the seems, constantly drunk and passively to actively suicidal constantly. Tim was determined and never told Alfie or I of the extent of training that Bruce was putting on him. And Bruce made it clear that Tim was not his son. Tim came in through the cave and left through the cave. He never even stayed over until after nearly a year and a half into being Robin when he got doped with fear gas and I made Bruce let me bring him up to the Manor. That was the first time that Tim had ever stayed the night. And he had slipped out before breakfast.” Dick finished his story and looked absolutely heartbroken at the past. Jason looked murderous.
“Well we will just have to fix that then. I’ll help Alfie make coco in the morning to go with breakfast. Now it is bed time for Babybirds and Bigbirds. And don’t argue with me Dick. I slipped a sedative into your drink so you should be passing out any moment now.” And as if Jason said the magic words, Dick sunk forward onto the table, passed out. Jason snickered and picked up his big brother. “Come on Timbit. We’ll do a sleepover in my room tonight.”
When Tim woke up the next morning, Jason and Dick were both gone. As he made his way downstairs, Tim subconsciously started to scratch at the bandages on his arms. Leslie had told him that it was a nervous habit. When Tim entered the dining room he didn’t notice that he was still scratching at were the cuts on his arms were and took a seat.
“Timmy, you doing all right?” Bruce asked when he noticed Tim scratching at the bandages.
The boy in question just looked up at his adopted father with wide eyes, not feeling like talking.
“You’re scratching pretty hard at your wrists there bud.” Bruce got up as he said that and slowly made his way over to his son. Tim continued to scratch harder, a determined look on his face. Gently Bruce reached over and pulled his hands into his own. Startled, the teen looked up and whined at the loss of pain.
“Do you not feel like talking today?” Tim nodded. “Ok. Well instead of hurting yourself, how about we go watch a movie and Alfie and the boys can bring us breakfast. OK?”
Tim frowned. Food didn’t sound good at the moment. Bruce seemed to notice and reassured him that it would be a light meal and he only had to eat a few bites in order for him to take his medication. As the father and son settled on the couch, Damian joined them with Ace. with one command, Ace was up on the couch and laying across Tim’s lap, grounding him.
Dick and Jason brought out food a few moments later just as Encanto was starting up. Dick squealed like a little girl in his glee at being able to sing along to the Disney songs. It was a good morning and after the first two movies, Bruce insisted on checking Tim’s wrists.
The two went to the bathroom and Tim sat on the toilet seat while Bruce gently removed the bandages. The stitched cuts, soon to be scars, were red and irriated at being scratched at, but Bruce didn’t reprimand or sigh disappointedly. He hugged Tim and applied an anointment to the cuts before bandaging them back up.
After the fourth movie, Tim found his voice again, though it was shaky and quiet.
After several more weeks of Tim waiting to get pinned down and questioned for his behavior or thrown back into the psych ward every time he screwed up, his anxiety got the best of him and he had a meltdown over something so small and stupid. Bruce was letting the Titans visit. Tim was not ready to see them after they had to save his sorry butt once again. He was embarrassed and worried that they would be afraid to talk to him or be near him so they didn’t set him off.
But Tim was to afraid to voice his concerns to Bruce and the Titans came to visit. And within the first thirty seconds of them being there, Kon was crying and hugging his best friend. Bart and Cassie soon joined in and the hug turned into a Titans snuggle party. They made Tim promise to never hurt himself again, that they were always willing to listen or help if he thinks he might want to kill himself again. This time, Tim started to cry, asking them what he did to deserve such amazing friends. The rest of the time the Titans were there, they spent the time playing video games and watching movies with the occasional board game thrown in as well. And Tim was glad that Bruce made them come over. He promised the Titans that he would always talk to them first if he was starting to feel depressed and suicidal, and after a few hours the Titans had to leave for a mission.
Over the next few weeks, things steadily got better, and there were also setbacks. There was a time where Tim had a panic attack when Jason’s anger got the better of him during a game and Tim flashed back to Titans tower. Jason felt bad and Tim was quick to forgive, but neither boy forgot the incident. Then there was the step forward, when Tim agreed to therapy and started to attend to weekly sessions.
The worst set back was when Tim locked himself in his room and started to cut once again. This time it was Jason who found him. He forcibly removed the blade from Tim’s hand, wrapped a towel around his arm and carried his small brother down to the medbay in order to stitch the worst of the cuts closed. The two brothers talked, Tim opening up that he was feeling stressed and anxious at the prospect of potentially being alone after the family realized just how useless Tim was. He explained that the darkness was becoming overwhelming, and it hurt deep down into his chest to think about the future. The darkness was making life unbearable.
“Timbo, that darkness will probably always be there, but you have to learn to be stronger than it, to show the darkness who is boss. But for how smart you are, that was some one of the stupidest things that you have ever said. We will love you no matter what. Even if you decide to drop being a vigilante all together and move across the country, we will still love you. I promise.” Jason swore. Bruce found the two snuggled up together in the theater room room, both asleep, fresh bandages on Tim’s arms.
Later Bruce and Tim had a talk over what Tim was feeling and Bruce voiced that he would always be welcome, reiterating what Jason told him.
After several more weeks, Tim decided to stop being an active vigilante, no longer wanting to deal with the stress and hardships of the field. He was so happy to hear that Bruce still wanted him in his family.
On one rare sunny day in Gotham, Tim sat in the window seat of his bedroom and looked outside, soaking in the sunshine. He held in his hand a small wooden token that Jason had carved for him on his six month anniversary of being cut free. In was a simple token with just the date of his recovery, but to Tim it was a wonderful reminder of everything he had gone through and everything he had survived. And it marked the day he was no longer scared of the darkness.