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Although wings are dysfunctional parts that humans are obliged to carry on their backs for their entire life, in Sumeru they are the greatest source of vanity in a person's life.
As a result of centuries of evolution in the human body, the wings have lost their function and now are two pieces of unnecessary burden on the human back. An unnecessary pair of bones, itchy due to the feathers that fall off during seasonal transitions, and useless parts that require extra care. They are also very inconvenient to put clothes on. People have to make sure that the wings pass smoothly through the gap in the back of their clothes.
And Kaveh is a child born without these wings as a result of a mutation.
There is nothing wrong with his health. Physically, not having wings doesn't create balance problems, it doesn't harm him in any way. Except for the lack of two things on his back, he is an ordinary human being like everyone else in Sumeru.
Anyone who saw the feathers on his mother's and father's wings would think that they were born to be mates and that their children would be born with wings just as wonderful as theirs. The way the golden feathers descend downwards to feathers with a red undertone reminded people of the rich harmony of gold and sapphire. If Kaveh had been born as a normal child, he would have carried wings as magnificent as his parents'.
His parents tried their best to make him forget he lacked wings, explaining that his condition was quite normal. When they were with Kaveh, both of them often hid their wings under their clothes, hid them from Kaveh's eyes, and treated him like a perfect child.
Because in his parents' eyes, whether he had wings or not, Kaveh was their only son and nothing in this world was more important than him and his happiness.
If he had wings, maybe his wings would have been even more beautiful than his parents', this is true, but he didn't have wings and that was never a problem in their home. Kaveh never felt out of place in his home, he always felt the love of his family reaching deep into his heart.
But it was not like home when he was outside, people were cruel. It was only a matter of time before a child like Kaveh, who grew up in a warm and soft family, would grow up to meet such cruel people and realize that not everyone is like his family.
When he started going to the Akademiya, he saw that everyone was trying to display their wings in the most splendid way. Between classes, everyone complimented each other's wings. Instead of using the bathroom as it should be, some sat on one of the benches and brushed their feathers as if to spite everyone, especially Kaveh. It was as if everyone was competing to show that their wings were better, and Kaveh didn't even have a chance to compete.
Not having wings to show off also took a huge toll on his self-esteem. It made him hesitant to socialize with people, but it wasn't because he was sad. He just felt he didn't fit in with other people.
The others often reminded Kaveh of this lack, the absence of wings, with their gaze. As he walked down the big corridor, people's eyes always followed him, especially his back. His back, which seemed empty compared to the others.
No one said anything to his face. They didn't insult him, or laugh at him. But Kaveh did not need to hear these things to know he was not wanted. Judging from their looks, he knew he was an incomplete human. Unlike his family's warm gaze, their gaze was always cold enough to make Kaveh shiver. He had no choice but to get used to it in order to move on and live.
---
That's why he was worried before approaching Alhaitham, who was sitting alone at the table in the House of Daena, looking at his book. He was afraid that his gaze would be as cold as other people's.
But Kaveh felt he was just like him.
His wings had emerald green feathers, unique compared to other humans, that darkened as they went up, becoming the darkest shade of green on the top. His single piece of feather could be traded for millions of Mora. Despite having these wings, no one paid any attention to him. The looks directed at him were almost the same as those directed at Kaveh. How could they look at him, at his unique wings, the way they looked at Kaveh, who didn't even have wings?
Unfortunately, no one but Kaveh seemed to notice the potential in these wings, not even Alhaitham himself, who carried them on his back. The feathers were in disarray, obviously not combed for a long time. Unlike everyone else's feathers, they had no shine and were dry. It was clear that the owner of the wing had been sloppy, he had not given these wings the attention they deserved.
It was a shame because after his family's wings, these were the most beautiful wings Kaveh had ever seen.
Kaveh gathered courage, finally approached him and talked. He even gave him a gift; a scented oil that he could use to brush his feathers, if he bothered to do so. It was the same oil his mother, and his father when he was still alive, used for their wings. He thought it could fix his wings in no time.
Alhaitham did not ask why he carried this oil even though he had no wings. His gaze wandered over the space on his back, yet there was nothing but curiosity in his eyes. Not a single comment about his missing wings came out of his mouth. He just thanked Kaveh for the gift and continued reading the book.
This might have been a rude interaction for other people, but for Kaveh, it was a turning point in his life. After his parents, Alhaitham was the first person to treat him like a human being and not care about his lack of wings.
Even though there was a scientific reason why he didn't have wings, he felt that he was being punished by the gods for a sin he had committed in his life before he was even born, while he suffered under the evil looks of other people. But when he was with Alhaitham, he was able to get away from this thought, and found solace between Alhaitham's wings.
"Your wings are beautiful."
After eating dinner, Kaveh and Alhaitham sit on the divan of the house they share to do their evening routine.
Alhaitham has taken off his shirt, his back is towards Kaveh, sitting cross-legged just in front of him, and his wings are open in a way reminiscent of a bird trying to impress its mate. Of course that's not why his wings are open. At least not as far as Kaveh knows, and Alhaitham doesn't even have to put on this kind of show for him to be impressed by his wings anyway.
Kaveh is holding the comb he bought at the Bazaar specifically for combing feathers since he doesn't have long nails enough to comb his feathers. It was a very expensive one, but since it was for Alhaitham... he didn't think twice before buying.
He slowly brings the comb closer to the feathers and carefully drags it down. Each time, he combs his feathers from top to bottom.
Despite such precision and care, he sees that two pieces of feathers have fallen out. He takes one of the feathers in his hand and sighs. "You should value your wings more. I know your feathers grow quickly but at least be careful. You don't realize how important they are."
"Why should they matter?" Alhaitham asks, turning his head to look over his shoulder at Kaveh. He takes the other fallen feather in his hand, turns to the front again, and twirls it between his two fingers. "They do nothing but weigh me down."
It is easy for Alhaitham, who has not experienced first-hand the problems Kaveh has suffered throughout his life because of this deficiency, to say such sentences. After all, Alhaitham is not the one who is ostracized by people for things he can't control, who is constantly looked down on with looks of pity, and who sometimes even has his projects from clients canceled for this very reason.
Kaveh wouldn't want him to go through such things. All he wants is to convince him that his wings are important, even though he has been trying for a long time without success. "Don't say that! It's an important determinant of human relationships, I can't imagine someone like you working at the Akademiya and not having wings."
"You give lectures, without wings."
It's true. Although the students at the Akademiya often look at his back, their gaze is much softer than it used to be. But he can't convince himself, or rather he doesn't want to convince himself, that the mistreatment he has been used to all his life can change.
"I'm an exception. Besides, I already know I'm an incomplete person."
"To me, you're not incomplete, other people have too much. I don't understand the value you place on these parts that do nothing for my body." Alhaitham closes his wings. "In the Akademiya, the sages look at how smart you are, not how you oil your wings. I have never seen someone succeed or graduate just because they have beautiful wings. And you already graduated, why would you have to be stressed about it?"
Kaveh puts the comb aside and smiles sadly. He opens the cap of the small bottle of Sunsettia essential oil and squeezes a small amount into his hand. He rubs his hands together and spreads the oil. "You're just saying that so I don't feel bad, aren't you?"
He knows Alhaitham's answer very well, it is something he has heard and memorized. He will tell him that wings don't add anything to a human's life, it is effort and talent that shape the life. Kaveh, who has suffered all his life for this reason, has no stomach for these words because he cannot believe them as long as his back is empty.
"I wouldn't lie to make you feel good. Wings don't determine a person's worthー"
Kaveh brushes him off. "Yeah, I know. Just open your wings, I'll apply oil to them."
Alhaitham no longer tries to force his own thoughts on him and opens his wings, the enormous wings fascinate Kaveh once again. He is constantly amazed at how the wings, which look normal when closed, look so big when open.
From top to bottom, the transition of the feathers from the darkest shade of green to a lighter shade always leaves Kaveh's mouth open. It is flawless and inimitable as if painted by the most talented painter, with paints like no other in the world. Wings that are unique only to Alhaitham, and that only Kaveh is allowed to touch.
His palm runs softly over his wings, feathers tickling the inside of his palms. Afraid of hurting him, he does his work slowly, the movement of his hands is like the care he takes as an architect making blueprints.
Meanwhile, his gaze shifts to his hands, the calloused fingers, his nearly knotted knuckles from holding a pencil. Is it appropriate for ordinary hands like his to hover over these perfect wings? What if he makes an irreparable mistake, what if his rough hands damage his elegant wings?
Yet... Alhaitham's wings are far from elegant. Beautiful? Yes. But it has a very menacing air. That's the main reason why most people feel uneasy before they even approach him. No one can understand his beauty, except Kaveh.
"Do you like it when I touch your wings, Alhaitham?"
His wings, which react as if they want to escape from his touch every time Kaveh touches them, twitch at this question. "It is not bad. Just a feeling I can't get used to."
"Just know they are beautiful. Cherish them."
"Which one is more beautiful?"
"Hmm?" Kaveh removes his hands from the wings, once again looking thoughtfully and in detail, at the wings he has already seared into every corner of his mind. He can recognize it just by touch with his eyes closed. No matter how he looks at them, they are both perfect. But even if one were different from the other, even if they weren't symmetrical, even if their colors weren't harmoniousーin short, even if they somehow didn't suit Kaveh's aesthetic taste, Kaveh would still find his wings beautiful. He might even stretch his aesthetic tastes a bit just for that reason.
Perhaps the reason he cares so much about these wings is not because they are beautiful, but because they belong to Alhaitham. Even if something were to happen to his wings now, his feelings for Alhaitham would never change.
"They look same for me. Maybe the right one?"
He chooses the right wing because when he combs his wings, the feathers on the right side always fall out more than on the left. The unequal number of feathers on the two wings and the fact that the feathers on the right wing are much weaker is interesting to him. It proves that the wings he thought were perfect are actually imperfect. He sees once again how beautiful Alhaitham's wings are despite their imperfections.
"Okay. Is it done?"
"Yeah..." Kaveh places a small kiss on the wings, the delicate feathers twitch again at the touch of his lips, and the wings close abruptly. Kaveh pouts, pulling his hands away like a child forbidden to play with his toys. "Will you give me my reward now, for taking care of your wings?"
Although just being able to touch his wings is reward enough, Kaveh is greedy when it comes to Alhaitham.
"What reward?"
Kaveh murmurs. "You know what it is."
Alhaitham places the feather he is twirling in his hand between the open book on his lap, closes the book, and turns his body toward Kaveh. He spreads his wings once more, wraps his arms around Kaveh's waist, and rests his chin on his shoulder. Then his wings, like his arms, wrap around Kaveh. "Are you happy now?"
"Mm... very much. Thank you."
---
The next morning when Kaveh wakes up, he cannot find Alhaitham in bed. Or rather, he can't feel Alhaitham. Because whenever they sleep together, Kaveh wakes up to find his head buried in Alhaitham's soft feathers and his arms wrapped around his waist. The pillow he rests his head on is soft too, but it can't compete with Alhaitham's feathers.
Without opening his eyes, he reaches out his arm, feels Alhaitham's pillow with his hand, realizes that he is indeed alone in the bed. He opens his eyes sleepily, yawns, his eye catches the clock on the wall: it is only 11 a.m. Why is Alhaitham up early even though today is his day off?
Kaveh leaves the bed and gets dressed before searching for Alhaitham. Since neither of them has anything to do today, they can have breakfastー or rather lunch outside.
After putting on his cape, he stands in front of his full-length mirror, looking at his messy blond hair. Today he started his routine from the end. Normally he would first wash his face, brush his teeth, style his hair, and then get dressed. Now, his messy hair doesn't go well with the clothes he's so carefully dressed in.
He turns around and looks at his back in the mirror. The red cape on his back resembles a bird with broken wings. This cape is nothing but a pathetic attempt to copy other people's wings. And even when he tries to copy it, he fails, because no human wings can be so lifeless and deflated. Even with his arms in the air, Kaveh is an incomplete human being without wings, no matter how he looks at it.
"Why would I think this now?" he asks himself, lowering his raised arms. "With or without wings, I should get used to living like this. I'm not a child anymore."
It's a pattern he repeats to himself every morning. But feeling excluded from all people is not a childish act, nor is it something that is forgotten when you grow up. Even though he is an adult now, the children who once gave him strange looks as a child have grown up with him. So nothing has changed. In people's eyes, just as in his own, Kaveh is an incomplete person.
"No... things changed." Although Kaveh has not been able to change his self-image, people are no longer so cruel to him. There are even people who admire him, even though he doesn't have wings.
Kaveh doesn't stand in front of the mirror anymore, leaves the room. Enough bad thoughts this morning, he thinks. No need to fill his head so much when the day has just begun. Besides... he will spend the day with Alhaitham. He doesn't need to think of such things when he's with him.
And where is Alhaitham? He thought he was at home, but he hadn't heard his voice since he woke up. Could it be that he's gone for a walk?
"Mmphー!"
Kaveh stops his steps, holding his breath, trying to understand what the sound he has just heard is. It sounds very similar to Alhaitham's voice, but he doesn't understand why such a sound he would make. So Kaveh makes it his main goal to find Alhaitham.
"Alhaitham? Are you okay?"
He doesn't get an answer, so decides to find him by searching on his own. He goes through the whole house, the rooms, the kitchen. He even looks in the fridge to see if he is stuck.
Then he steps towards the bathroom, grabs the doorknob and turns it. But the doorknob doesn't turn all the way, the door doesn't open. Alhaitham must be there if it is locked from the inside.
"Alhaitham?" Kaveh presses his ear against the door, trying to figure out if the door has broken down and locked itself or if it was locked by Alhaitham. He hears rapid breathing from inside, and covers his mouth before reacting aloud, embarrassed to be listening to him. "Do you have a stomach flu? IーI can get medicine if you need. I can also prepare the tea I borrowed from Tighnari, it speeds up digestion."
He was thinking of going out to eat with Alhaitham, but if he is sick it might be better to stay at home. That... doesn't sound like a bad plan to Kaveh. They could spend time together at home, after all.
"No need. Can youー leave the house?"
Alhaitham's voice is muffled on the other side of the door, but Kaveh hears him clearly.
"Excuse me? Why would I do that?" When there is no answer, he continues speaking. "No need to be embarrassed, we are both human after all. I'm making you some tea if you're okay with it?"
Alhaitham doesn't seem like a person to be embarrassed about an illness, but then again, every human has situations to be embarrassed about. So Kaveh doesn't think too much about it.
Shortly after, Alhaitham answers. "Okay."
It takes Kaveh only five minutes to prepare the tea he mentioned. Since he is worried about Alhaitham, he tries to move as fast as he can. In his haste, he even accidentally spilled a glass of water, dropped the sugar bowl, and had to clean it all up. Five minutes is a very short time to do all this and Kaveh is proud of himself for being so quick.
He pours the medicine he found in the cupboard into the tea, stirring the powder until it is completely dissolved. He picks up the cup and walks to the bathroom door to check on him once more, raises his hand, knocks. "Alhaitham? I made the tea. Do you feel better? It'll get cold if you don't drink it now."
"The door is open."
"Huh? No, it'sー" Kaveh was about to say 'locked', but this time the doorknob turned with a click and the door opens. Kaveh slowly pushes the door forward, the door opens completely.
Kaveh's gaze is first on the floor, on his own feet. If Alhaitham is... well... unavailable, he plans to just give him the tea and leave. It's unhygienic to drink something in a place like bathroom, but in such case, an exception can be made.
Then his gaze shifts a little further ahead, to Alhaitham's feet, and finally to the bright red blood stains... on the white tile.
Kaveh quickly lifts his head in concern. "Alhaithamー" his fingers go limp at the sight, the glass in his hand falls to the floor and shatters noisily, accompanied by a scream that escapes Kaveh's lips. The shards of glass scatter around with the hot tea, landing mostly on Kaveh's feet, burning his feet. But this is nothing compared to Alhaitham's condition.
Kaveh puts his hands to his mouth, blinks his eyes repeatedly to make sure this is not a dream. But every time he blinks, Alhaitham continues to stand in front of him, his back towards Kaveh. "What... what happened here!"
"Tone it down," says Alhaitham, as if nothing happened.
"Alhaitham, that'sー" Kaveh steps towards him, crushing the shards of glass scattered on the floor, but he puts his pain aside for the moment. He raises his hands, and tries to reach out to him but pulls them back to himself again, doesn't know what to do because of the panic he feels. "We shouldー oh my god, what have you done? Let's go to the Bimarstan, quickly!"
From the deep wound that starts at Alhaitham's shoulder blade and runs in a long line down to his waist, the blood is dripping fast onto the tiles, so fast that someone who has not seen the scene might think the voice is coming from a faucet.
His right wing has been ruthlessly torn off by someone, and so much blood is pouring out of the wound that Kaveh can't even tell how deep it is. But can guess, since his wing is attached to his bones on his back. He knows that if he doesn't get help soon, it will be too late.
"Where... where is your wing? Who did this to you?"
Alhaitham finally turns to him, revealing the wing between his hands that he had hidden from Kaveh. The emerald green feathers that Kaveh had so carefully combed, shaped, oiled, moisturized, and kissed only yesterday are now covered in blood. The feathers under the wing are lighter in color, showing the blood more clearly, and once again Kaveh realizes how much Alhaitham has lost blood.
"I didー" Alhaitham holds on to the sink with one hand, using support to stand. Gritting his teeth, he finishes his sentence. "I did this to myself."
"Areー are you insane?!" Kaveh quickly lunges forward, this time many small shards of glass cut the soles of his feet. He doesn't care, grabs him around the waist before Alhaitham loses his balance. Blood stains his palm, and Kaveh trembles with disgust and fear. Alhaitham's body is cold. "Why would you tear off your own wing?!"
"I didn't tear it off, I removed it."
"You..!" Kaveh looks around, searching for anything to stop the bleeding. Finally, he catches the sight of a brown towel and quickly pulls it off the hook. He folds it in half and presses it to his back, slowly and nervously at first, then firmly. Alhaitham bites his lips, but can't stop a groan escaping his mouth. The blood quickly soaks through the towel, drenching it. "Maybe there is still a chance to save your wing, let's go! I-I will help you walk."
Kaveh takes him by the arm and helps him to walk. He makes sure that Alhaitham's steps are away from the broken glass on the floor, even though the soles of his feet are aching. But Kaveh's pain must be nothing compared to what Alhaitham is feeling right now.
When they reach the living room, Kaveh feels all the strength draining from his body. He looks him up and down, realizing that there is no way he can carry his large body all the way to Bimarstan when he is so weak. He might make a wrong move trying to carry him and hurt him more than he already is. He should not take a risk in such a critical situation.
Kaveh carefully helps Alhaitham to sit on the divan. As Alhaitham sits, he looks at his right wing, the wing that looks like withered a flower between his hands, and at his own hands, covered in blood. Then to the floor, to the bloody footprints. The sharp smell of blood almost makes him dizzy.
"I'll get you a doctor, it will be faster. Wait me here, okay? Please don't try to walk, and please don't try to do anything."
When Kaveh turns to leave, Alhaitham grabs his cape and pulls. There is no strength in his grip, the loss of blood must have caused him to lose all his strength. So Kaveh stops quickly, not wanting him to force himself. "I promise I'll be back. I know it's hard, but just hold on a little longer. Don't worry, I won't let anything happen to you or your wing."
"I never cared about my wings," Alhaitham says as he lets go Kaveh's cape. His voice is very low, and his face looks tired. It worries Kaveh even more to see his face so pale. "You always thought we were not equal, just because of my wings, while I never once cared about them. But maybe, if you have one of these wings, it will be worth to care about them."
"You... you did this for me?" Kaveh averts his gaze, feeling overwhelmed by the guilt and shame. He can't bear to look at Alhaitham when he is bleeding like this already, and knowing that he is the cause of this wound makes it even harder.
How could Kaveh have pushed Alhaitham, always a reasonable man, to do this? If he hadn't told him about his problems, if he hadn't sulked all the time, would Alhaitham still be sitting there bleeding like this? He didn't even realize that he was putting the weight of his own problems on Alhaitham. "I... I am sorry. I never wantedー I never wanted this. I would never want to see you hurt."
"Why do you look so sad now?"
"Why? Because you're literally going to die if I don't get a doctor now. You probably can't see your wound but I did and it looks horrible. And to think it's all because of me... I..." Kaveh blinks, trying to keep the tears from flowing. "I don't see why would you go this far for me."
"Why wouldn't I?" Alhaitham reaches for Kaveh's blood-covered hand, interlacing their hands, their fingers fitting snugly between each other. "Doesn't mates share the feathers on their wings?"
"They share feathers, not wings!" Kaveh lets the tears roll down his cheeks in desperation, his vision blurring. "You never cared about these things, why would you care now! And I... I have nothing to give you."
"You do."
"What do I have...?"
"Your love." Alhaitham laughs. "That was what you said when you confessed."
"No need to remember such things right now." Kaveh feels his face begin to flush as he recalls this memory.
"You said you want to share the rest of your life with me. Then why not let me share my wings?" He sees Alhaitham's eyes slowly closing, the hand holding Kaveh's hand falling away. One last question barely escapes his lips before his eyes close completely. "Will you carry my wing, Kaveh?"
"Your wing is beautiful."
After eating dinner, Kaveh and Alhaitham sit on the divan of the house they share, trying to turn a new habit into a routine.
Kaveh has taken off his shirt and is sitting cross-legged in front of Alhaitham, his back towards him, his wing fixed in a way reminiscent of an injured bird waiting for help. Despite all this, he proudly carries the wing on his back that was given to him as a gift, even though deep down he doesn't consider himself worthy of carrying Alhaitham's wing.
His cheeks turn pink at Alhaitham's compliment, but it is not easy to see in the dimly lit room. With his back to Alhaitham, he probably can't see it either. He feels the muscles at the corners of his lips want to form a smile, and he forces himself to stop it. With both joy and a little guilt, he murmurs. "It's your wing though..."
"No." Alhaitham's voice is firm, clearly not wanting to give Kaveh a chance to protest. "It's yours now."
Kaveh doesn't protest, because is there any point in protesting now? When Alhaitham spends his time and effort combing his feathers, and when he says such kind words to him, why should he protest instead of accepting them? But he can't just be quiet without any comment. "It's still hard to believe. Waking up and seeing a wing on my back when I look at the mirror every morning, I mean."
Kaveh first rejected Alhaitham's offer. He had witnessed the pain Alhaitham had gone through to give him this wing, and he felt that he should not take this beautiful wing away from Alhaitham. Kaveh did not deserve to carry this wing, he was always an incomplete person. He should not make Alhaitham suffer the same way he suffered.
Alhaitham respected his decision, but before he did, he explained himself. He explained once again that his wings meant nothing, that he didn't care about the space on the right side of his back, and that his wings would only be meaningful if Kaveh accepted his offer. For him, they were just an extra part of his body and if Kaveh needed them to see himself as a complete human being like everyone else, Alhaitham was more than ready to share them with him. Even though he didn't think Kaveh needed wings.
And Kaveh... After years of wanting wings, Kaveh couldn't refuse the offer at the end.
It wasn't because he wanted wings, it wasn't to fill his back. It was just... carrying a piece of Alhaitham on his own back... it feels so intimate. Can he be closer to him than this?
The stitches on Kaveh's back often ache even after two months. Since his body is not suitable for carrying a wing, he cannot move the wings attached to his back, they just hang on like an ornament. It is also very difficult for him to maintain his balance with only one wing; whenever he stands, he can feel a weight on the right side of his body, and he often has to slow down his steps to avoid losing his balance.
He is sure that Alhaitham also has this problem, but he hides it much more easily than Kaveh. Kaveh doesn't know if Alhaitham hides it because he doesn't want to make him feel more guilty.
But he notices. He notices that the wound on the right side of Alhaitham's back hurts all the time, and he has a long way to go before it heals completely. That's why he feels guilty.
"You'll get used to it," Alhaitham says.
Kaveh laughs. "Worry about yourself first. Your wound hasn't healed yet."
When Kaveh was just a little child, even though he had no wings, he always wished someone would sit behind him, and take the time to brush his wings. Now everything is just as little Kaveh imagined it while crying in his room. Alhaitham finally fulfilled that wish.
As he thinks about all this, he feels a strange ache in his chest. He sighs, trying to get used to the physical effects of the happiness he feels on his body.
But he feels another ache in his back. Alhaitham is rough as he runs the comb through Kaveh's feathers, and as his wing is pulled from his skin, the stitches on his back ache. Kaveh cannot bear it, a low groan escapes his lips.
Alhaitham's hands stop quickly. "Does it hurt?"
At first, Kaveh feels like an ungrateful brat for showing pain, after all, Alhaitham is doing him a favor by sparing him time like this. But then he remembers this is the man with whom he will share the rest of his life and he should no longer hide everything he feels.
"You do it too roughly," Kaveh openly admits. "Be more gentle."
"That's how I always did."
This confuses Kaveh. "Did to who? I've never seen you groom your own wings, let alone someone else's."
"My grandmother's. I used to groom her wings and she groomed mine."
Kaveh thinks of the first time he met Alhaitham and his tangled green feathers on his wings. Now everything makes sense. After his grandmother's death, there must have been no one left to take care of his wings. And since his grandmother was too soft-hearted to tell him that his techniques were bad, Alhaitham never learned to take care of his wings properly.
Since Kaveh is always drowning in his own sorrow, he often forgets that behind Alhaitham's dull expression and his confident posture, there is a great loss. Just like Kaveh, he too has experienced losses in life.
Thinking about it makes Kaveh feel a bitter sadness inside. But he is not too sad, knowing that he will always be with him to brush his feathers. Although... if he dies before Alhaitham, there will be no one to take care of his wing, just like before. So he must be honest and teach him.
"You should be more gentle. Feathers are already fragile, and this wing is extra sensitive for me because it is attached to my back by external forces, against my nature."
Kaveh reaches his arm back and holds Alhaitham's hand. He takes it towards his own wing, gently rests the comb on top, and pulls it downwards. In this way, he shows Alhaitham how he should do it. "From up to down, slowly."
"How does it feel?"
"Honestly, I don't feel anything on my wing at all. And it hurts when you pull or press too harshly." Once Alhaitham grasps the nature of the work, Kaveh lets go his hand, leaving Alhaitham to do all the work. He chuckles at the thought, covers his mouth with his hand, and speaks. "But there is no roses without thorns. I... like the fact that we share the same wing."
The wing Alhaitham gave him not only filled the hole on his back, but also filled the hole in his heart he didn't even know existed. Standing side by side with Alhaitham, thinking that the single wing on both their backs makes them whole, feels like a promise. A promise to stay together for their entire life.