Chapter Text
“Ladybug!” Adrien ran around the rubble, frantically turning his head and trying to spot his partner amidst the aftermath of the chaos.
The entire plaza had been turned on its head. Stones had been unearthed, glass made the ground glint with the red of the sun, and the whole area had been evacuated. It was like searching for phantoms in a ghost town.
He didn’t care what person had been infected with the Akuma this time. All that was business said and done.
“Ladybug!”
The entire thing was a blur. Ladybug had been pinned against the wall. His arm throbbed white-hot pain. They were close to blinkering out, and she had…
Adrien shook his head. “Can’t think about that now. Can’t… Ladybug!” Trying to keep his mind focused, his feet pounded against the ground, and he ignored the shooting pains coming from his left arm.
Everything was grey. Dusty. Nothing was there aside from ruined rubble and torn flags.
Adrien’s lungs screamed at him to stop running, and his body forced him to take a few moments to try and catch his breath. He bent over, hands on his knees, trying to steady the labouring wheezes from his throat.
It was when he went to take another step, that the colour caught his eye.
Red.
Underneath a broken piece of debris, he saw it. A tiny bloodied hand, curled up and unmoving.
His stomach lurched as he took a closer look.
The dust cleared, and that was when he saw her. All of her. Her limbs were thrown into odd positions, a tooth had ended up knocked to the side, and her nose had been broken in several angles. Her pigtails were barely in, the ribbons tattered and torn.
Her ear lobes trickled with blood where the earrings had once been.
Adrien had to cover his mouth to stop himself from throwing up.
Marinette. It was Marinette on the ground.
Of all the ways to find out Ladybug’s identity, but this? It wasn't the way he wanted it to happen. He imagined a moment in time, full of trust and friendship. Not finding her bloodied, broken body after an attack he failed to protect her from.
“Mari--?” He couldn’t bring himself to say her full name as he crouched down beside her, touching her shoulder like it were made of cracked glass. Adrien flinched when the skin had grown cold.
There was no way she should be alive after the fall, after the injuries she’d sustained.
Yet, in spite of it all, he heard her breathe.
The small voice in her head was scared. Screaming. Panicking. Its words didn’t belong to her mind, but she still heard it.
Pinned against the wall, hands clawing at the stone to find a way out. Words failing her. There was nothing she could do. Akuma was too strong. Found a way to break through their defensive suits. Moves. Nothing worked.
…Ladybug couldn’t do anything. Arms were unusable. Chat busy with other monsters. People. Couldn’t reach her in time. Won’t reach her in time.
I won’t let him take you, Tikki.
Delivering a broken child to their worried parents was something Adrien never wanted to relive again.
Seeing Sabine and Tom fall to their knees as their precious daughter was placed on an emergency stretcher and into the refuge of an ambulance, would be a sight that would haunt him forever. Sabine had stared at him with a broken expression, not sure whether to slap him or thank him and for a moment, he was a little boy again. No Chat Noir around to be himself.
He was just the kid that couldn’t make his father smile anymore.
Adrien sighed and sat up, ignoring the awkward knots in his back. Sitting in the same position long was not comfortable.
“Adrien,” Plagg popped his head out from his bag. “You know it ain’t your fault, right?”
“You’ve said that already.” He was surprised at how hoarse his voice had gotten, but didn’t move to get any water. He just stayed put.
“You know it’s the truth. Lady--Marinette made the choice. She wouldn’t want you to blame yourself.”
Adrien felt himself chuckle, despite the situation at hand. “Are you trying to make me feel better, Plagg?” He teased. “It goes against your “devil may care” nature, does it not?”
“Maybe, but it goes against yours to stare at the same hospital bed for over an hour.”
A heavy sighed followed as Adrien stared back at the small bed tucked away in the corner. Plagg was right. Ever since Marinette had been admitted to the hospital, he had been there almost every day to visit. The sterility and clinical feel of the room hadn’t done anything to ease his nerves, and perhaps it was rude to carry on visiting when he wasn’t a family member, but he was constantly being drawn back there.
To check, to worry, to give up. She still breathed, her chest slowly rising and falling, but that was the only sign of life from her.
Marinette, though she had always been rather pretty, was not in a good state. Her nose had been broken in two different places. Her skin was the parlour of curdled milk. Her left arm had been bound to a cast, and the rest of her body had been recovering from the stitching and putting the joints back into place. Red seeped through, the first few hours, but was now pale pink against the red of her skin.
And her eyes. Hollowed out with black smears of bags under them, and closed off from the light.
“It’s my fault.” He leaned over to brush a small strand out of her face, and his hand opened to gently cup her cheek. “If I hadn’t…”
The soft tone of his voice cracked, and he withdrew his hand with a sharp jolt.
“Adrien.”
“Don’t, Plagg. We were supposed to be partners in all of this, and I couldn’t protect her.”
Air escaping. A hand clamped over her throat. Other one trying to take off her earring. This was her chance. One chance. She just had to hold out long enough until Tikki blinkered out, and…
“Marinette, I’m sorry!”
When the small red creature left her earring and manifested beside her, their attention was drawn. The grip on her throat had lessened, and she swung her legs up–snatching Tikki in her hand and using her knee to deliver a blow to the Akuma-parasite’s jaw.
They staggered back from the blow, stumbled. She yanked her head back as the enemy pulled back with a jolt, and began to plummet.
Awkward.
That was the only way he could describe the moment. Marinette’s mother–Sabine–glared at him out of the corner of her eye from across the room, as she stroked her daughter’s hand. Proudly, she let her tears silently fall.
Hold your head high as you cry, Adrien. Nobody can take away your right to cry.
Adrien had seen the strength of his mother’s words reflected tenfold in the mother of his partner. She had insisted he didn’t have to leave, but there was restraint in her voice, pursing her lips after each interaction.
“Why was she there?”
The question clicked in his head, and he was silent.
That only seemed to frustrate her more, and her voice began to crack under the pressure of not knowing whether or not her child would ever wake up again. “Why is my daughter the one here in this hospital, bruised and bloodied, and fighting for her life? Why…”
Why didn't this happen to you? He knows she wants to ask.
Instead, she says something else. “Why were you with her?”
Adrien froze as he looked away. Marinette would hate for her parents to find out. I don’t think she’s going to be happy if she finds out I know who she is. But I… I have to find a way to…
“I’m… her… boyfriend. We were on a date up there.”
WHY. WHY MUST YOU GO WITH THE MOST AWKWARD OPTIONS.
She seemed taken aback. “You’re Adrien?”
“Uh. Yes. I am.” He blinked several, surprised at the core. “Has she… spoken about me?”
“Well,” she cleared her throat and settled her daughter’s hand back onto the bed. “Never directly. But there were several small notes with your name surrounded with a heart. I just assumed she had a crush on someone with the name.”
“Oh.” He managed, his mouth feeling dry. “Well, uh. I wish we were… introduced under better circumstances.”
“Likewise.” Her glare softened, making him feel slightly more at ease. Still, she didn’t desist with her questions. “Do you know what happened there? All the news is saying is that Ladybug and Chat Noir were there–you know, those kids who are fighting against…” She rubbed the back of her neck. “I don’t know what they’re fighting. But they’re protecting the city nonetheless. How did… how did Marinette…”
Those eyes glossed over, and in spite of the colour difference, they reminded him too much of Marinette’s. Or Ladybug's.
One in the same, really.
“We were separated in the middle of it.” He lied, tasting like acid on his tongue. “The Ak…bad guy must have mistaken Marinette for Ladybug, and when I got there, Ladybug was trying to hold them off from hurting her anymore. I think she fell, but…”
The urge to cry was overcoming him. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I’m sorry…”
He flinched when he felt a warm hand on his back seconds later and lifted his head to see Sabine smiling gently at him.
“My daughter’s heart is not captured so easily. Whoever you are to her, you must have a good soul. I will not hate someone my daughter deems as worthy of her heart. You have no reason to be sorry, child.”
Adrien forced down the urge to cry down his throat, lodging any words as he began to tremble.
“Are you trying not to cry?” Her voice was filled with sympathy. One he had thought he’d forgotten.
“S-Sorry.” He wheezed. “I…sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I'm so sorry…“
The apologies faded into muffled sobs as he was given permission to cry into the lap of the mother of the friend he had failed to protect. If the small gesture of patting his head reminded him of his own mother, then that was just an additional comfort he didn’t deserve.
But heavens above did he crave it.
Warmth.
Everything blurry. Pain in her arm. Shooting. Ears stung. No more earrings. The air was cold against the drying blood.
Her legs weren’t moving. Not on their own. Lifted. Carried. Strong arms holding her. She felt safe.
Safety… Tikki was… safe…
“Marinette, I need you to hold on for me, please.”
That voice was lulling her… but it wanted her awake…
“Nng…trying…”
Over the course of the two weeks since her emergency admission, Marinette’s small hospital room had transformed.
The looming sterile walls remained, but they were brightened up by the various cards littering the sides of the tables, the sill of the window, and folded up neatly on the floor of her bed. Balloons were tied to the end of her bed (surprisingly, one of them was from Chloe), giving more colour to the whitewashed walls.
Alya had been furious that she wasn’t allowed to bring fresh camellias into the hospital room, so had apparently not slept for two days as she prepared stuffed flowers to put next to her instead. She was more a photographer than a designer, but if anyone could appreciate the effort, it was Marinette.
She was looking brighter as of late. At one point, he could have sworn she’d smiled.
“Alya’s still working hard on her patchwork flowers for you.” Talking to an unconscious Marinette hadn’t been as awkward as he’d thought, especially after the nurses told him she could probably hear him. It made all the embarrassment worth it. “You won’t believe how long she’s tried to get the rose to look right. You’re worth the effort, obviously, but it’s… kind of amusing to watch her go completely out of the field for someone. She always seemed so reserved before you came here.”
Adrien walked over and began to sort through her cards again. “Chloe wrote you a small note, actually. It just says, “hurry up and get better. It’s weird you not being here and being weird”.” He chuckled to himself. “I think that’s her roundabout way of saying that she actually does miss you being at school with her. Hopefully, she won’t be so mean to you when you come back, but I won’t let her any longer.”
Taking a small moment for himself, his gaze was drawn to the skylines of Paris, small hints of night sprinkled on the evening sky. Stars began to poke through the blazing red flames of the atmosphere, and the glinting city lights were a beauty in their own right.
He sighed, stopped, and breathed.
It hadn’t been easy defending it all on his own for the last two weeks. But if it was to keep her safe?
He’d defend the galaxy if he had to.
Trapped in your own mind, it’s like time doesn’t exist.
Everything moves, but it’s you controlling the pieces. Your mind can’t create physical objects beyond your own flesh and bone, but it creates colours. Remnants of sound. Illusions of a touch.
Yet she knows she didn’t imagine warm arms pick her up off the battlefield. The moment replays, over and over. Monochrome grey against scarlett. Nothing else is in colour, except for those.
The city - or the plaza - was in ruins. Rubble everywhere. Murmurs of a scream, calling out for a part of her she threw away to protect Tikki. Somewhere in her, Ladybug still screams for her to awaken, but there’s something else coaxing out of her mental refuge.
A voice.
A small, deep voice. It talks to her, though how often she doesn’t know. Time is stitched together when nobody talks, and she’s left to her own dreams.
But it’s talking to her again.
“…times wonder if you two would be good friends…”
Wait…
“…want….wake up soon…”
Is that… two voices speaking as one?
“…all miss you…”
Chat Noir…
“…know you won’t be gone forever…”
And Adrien…?
Are they speaking with the same voice?
“Please wake up, Marinette. I’ll… I’ll do anything to see you awake.”
Hold on, I’m… I’m on my way…
All the shadows of doubt nearly killed the light of hope in her mind, had it not been for the voice that coaxed her away from her own fear. The fear of never seeing colours again, of hearing music stream around her ears.
Waking up had been confusing. Too confusing. Terrifying, even. Her eyelids barely managed to crack themselves open, and all they showed her was a room of a headache-inducing white. Too many voices meshed together into a mess of words she still couldn’t decode.
Her parents had been the first in. Her mother held her close, her father wept as he clutched her hand. They were praying to anything that would listen to hear their thanks for bringing their daughter back to her. Marinette was sure that if she hadn’t been so tired, she would have been crying right alongside them.
Then her friends had piled in the masses. (And classmates. She wasn’t even aware that over two hundred people knew her name, much less cared she almost died as “collateral” damage.) Hailing her a “badass” or “hero” for managing to survive a battlefield. The questions about Chat Noir and Ladybug poured in, as expected, but Alya had soon ushered them out so they could have a private “catch-up”, according to the rest of the school.
In reality, it was much more raw. Hearing her best friend break down over her almost dying had not been easy.
“Now,” her mother had taken the last of the cards down and put them in a box and sat at the end of her bed. “I know you’re still going to be here for the next day or so before you come home, but if you need me for anything, call us. Even if it’s just pizza.”
Pizza? Wow, Mom. You really are being generous.
“I know, Mom.” Marinette’s laugh brought a smile to her mother’s face, and for that, she was glad. Perceptive or not, she hadn’t missed the bags underneath her mother’s eyes. “But please, I want you to go home and sleep. I’m going to be okay, really. Little messed up in the face, but I’m good with makeup.”
Sabine sighed, and put a hand over hers. “Alright, honey. I’ll try not to worry you. But for the record, your face is not messed up. You are my daughter. No matter what injuries you get, you are beautiful.”
Marinette smiled, a few tears brimming at the corner of her eyes. “Thanks, Mom.”
“Uh… did I come at a bad time?”
In the doorway, a rather awkwardly hovering Adrien stood there, one hand behind his back. Sabine looked over at her with a knowing smile.
“Not at all, Adrien.” Wait, when did they get so acquainted? How does she even know his name? “I can imagine that you’d want to spend some time alone with Marinette after everything. Just remember–her mouth is still cut, so no funny business.”
If that hadn’t confused her, the sudden tint of red Adrien had turned gave her no clues. Her mother bid her one last goodbye, winked over at Adrien, and left the room.
If awkward tension could be cut with a knife, the one that hung overhead in her hospital room needed to be cut with a chainsaw.
“Look, I know you’re probably wondering why I’m here.” Marinette jolted as he marched on into her room, and stood stiffly at her bedside. “But I need to talk to you about a few things first. I promised I’d do this the day you woke up, but all your friends and family wanted to see you first, and I thought it would be best to just tell you after everything settled down. So you’d have time to process. Things.”
He’s really shy. And awkward. And socially stunted. Everything’s a bit of a mess when he doesn’t know what to say. Still, she stayed silent, merely nodding to his request.
Adrien stared at her for a few moments, before ruffling his hair. “I thought it wouldn’t be this frustrating… agh.”
A small part of her nagged that, somewhere, she had seen this sort of behaviour before. Perhaps she should have been more nervous about the fact that someone she liked very much was in her hospital room, alone, nervous, and not judging her for her messed-up face, but it felt natural. Her mother had said plenty of people had visited her over the past few weeks, had that included Adrien as well?
“Marinette, I know.”
She paused. “Know?”
“About…” His resolve faltered, but he rubbed his arm, before taking a step toward her. She felt her heart lodge in her chest as he took her hand, knelt down, and give a very familiar grin.
“My Lady.” He said, and everything fell into place.
Watching her process the information had been agonizing.
First, her eyes had widened as she realized when he was referencing. Which hadn’t worried him all that much– it was what he had been expecting. It would have been a normal reaction no matter the context.
Then, she had looked away from him, and he saw her ears turn red. That… hadn’t been on the list of expectations.
“Marinette?”
“Y-you’re…”
He allowed himself to crack a smile. “Yeah.”
“All this time? Did you know… how did you find out?”
Bloodied hand. Broken body. Barely breathing.
His breath was shaky as he stood back up, and perched on the edge of her bed. “When Tikki blinked out of you… you began to fall. I think you meant for her to do that, so you could grab her and keep her safe. Catch the Akuma off-guard.”
“Tikki mentioned that, but she was out cold along with me.”
“I couldn’t find you.” Adrien hung his head. “I tried, I tried to figure out where you’d landed. I didn’t know where you were, if I’d–I’d been there, I could have helped. I began running to try and find you, Plagg went another way, then I saw–”
He’d forgotten how to breath.
“S-Saw…”
“Adrien?”
Hot prongs of tears stabbed at his eyes, and his quick breaths resulted in hysterics.
“Damn, not now! I-I didn’t–” Another hiccup came instead.
Stop stop stop! She doesn’t need to see this right now! She’s recovering from your mistake, dammit! You don’t deserve to cry in front of her–
“A-Adrien, it’s okay–”
“It’s not okay!” He argued, sounding like that five-year-old boy again. “I nearly… I nearly got you killed. I nearly… I almost…”
He sunk to the floor with his head in his hands, and began to whimper.
“I can’t, Marinette, I can’t… please tell me I didn’t give you bad luck, too.” He begged. “Please tell me I didn’t cause all this. I’m--I’m so sorry.”
She wasn’t saying anything. Of course she wasn’t. Her mind was clocking all cogs of information together already. He’d already been the one to blame for his mother going missing. His father rejected his entire physical presence. Everyone at the estate watched him with cold eyes. Now Ladybug–Marinette, would reject him as well. Disown him. She had every right too, and he had no arguments to convince her how sorry he was–
“Adrien.”
Her hand had touched his shoulder, and he looked up with puffy eyes.
“Come up here so I can talk to you, please.”
His legs listened to her more than they did his own hesitance, and they rose to stand next to her. She tugged at his hand gently, and he sat down upon her silent request.
She took a deep breath, and smiled at him. “It wasn’t you fault. You didn’t cause all this. You haven’t given me bad luck.”
“B-But–”
“It wasn’t your fault. You didn’t cause all this. You haven’t given me bad luck.”
The words played from her lips like a mantra, putting more emphasis that it wasn’t all his fault, that hedidn’t cause all this pain, and that he hadn’t given all the bad luck to her in the past few weeks. She repeated it until the trembles in his fingers stopped, until the corners of his eyes grew dry, and even past that.
Marinette didn’t stop. Ladybug didn’t relent. They continued to tell him everything he had denied about himself.
Eventually, she replaced her words with new ones.
Her tentative shyness returned. “You don’t have to be sorry. I’m just sorry I made you worry. But, please, I don’t want anyone else to be sorry.” She put a hand on his shoulder. “I want you to know that even after all this, I’ll… I’ll never stop being glad you’re my partner. I’m happy your Adrien andChat Noir, and I still trust you. I still want to fight by your side. I just want you to be okay with that.”
His eyes brightened almost immediately. He couldn’t believe what she had just said all of that. After everything that had happened, she still wanted to be beside him, still wanted to trust him. A part of him was sure he didn't deserve it, but Marinette/Ladybug, whoever she was, radiated certainty in the midst of all the turmoil she had been through.
Yet, he still had to ask. “Are you sure?”
“Well," she held up her cast-covered arm. "It’ll have to be when I can fight again. My arm is still going to be bound up for a few weeks.” She frowned. “How have you been patrolling the city whilst I've been out, anyway?”
“Oh, right. I forgot to mention.” He pointed to where Tikki was sleeping. “Turns out Plagg and Tikki can combine with one of us at once, but it exhausts them more. I guess you can say I’ve become Chatbug for the last few weeks.”
“That…” She snickered. “I have to see. But I am sure.” She put a hand over his, cheeks going pink and gazing at him with shy eyes. “I was sure with Chat, I was sure with Adrien, and I’ll always be sure when it comes to you.”
Usually the roles were reversed in the films, the books, the comics. It would be the girl waiting patiently at the heroes side as they lay in a hospital bed. It would be the woman tearing up over hearing such wonderful, heartfelt words.
Well, those cliches were long and drawn out, he thought. If the world thought him stupid for saying this because she was a girl, he didn’t care: Marinette and Ladybug would always be his heroes.
“S…same.” He choked out, covering his mouth to stop another sob.
Her look pitied him, but it didn’t make him feel small. She opened out one arm, and gestured for him to come closer.
Curled up on her hospital bed, he lay against her chest, closing his eyes as another fit of sobs began. Marinette’s free arm cradled Adrien closer to her, not willing to let her own tears be pushed back for his comfort. She nestled her face into his hair, and the two of them drew as close as they could to each other’s comfort.
Damn the world they were supposed to protect. For now, they would be what they were underneath the masks: two scared kids with the weight of the world on their shoulders, scared and clinging to the one person who could understand their situations wholeheartedly, and attempt make them feel that little bit safer.
Extra:
Winter had finally gotten out of her nine-month slumber, stretched out her arms, and covered the entire city of Paris in a frozen white blanket. Leaves had been blown away by the skyline breezes, sending chills to the far reaches of the city.
The barest traces of sunlight remained in the mid-afternoon, in the small gardens surrounding the hospital. Out the way of the paths, in the middle of the grass, Adrien wheeled Marinette in her chair to enjoy the skies darkening by the second.
“Dad says I should be able to come home tomorrow. I won’t be at school until my injuries heal properly–my legs still need to be eased back into walking, but it’s still a relief to come home!”
She stretched her free arm and gave him a lazy, if somewhat shy smile, and he couldn’t help but return it in kind. Seeing her in such a cheerful state was… unusual, but a blessing. At least she could respond.
Still… “Call me selfish, but I think I’ll miss these visits.”
“Hm? Why?”
“I won’t get to see you as often.”
Immediately she hid her face, her ears turning red. The sight was too cute not to laugh at, even a little.
“A-Actually, there’s something I wanted to ask you about.”
He leaned over to look at her. “What is it?”
“It’s about my Mom. Thanks for not telling her I was Ladybug, by the way. But… did you say something to her as a cover story?" Adrien stiffened as she continued. "She’s acting weird whenever I so much as mention you visiting me. Always winking or congratulating me. When I ask her why, she just says I,” she held up one finger for quotations. “apparently “already know the answer within my strong-willed heart” or something. All I wanted was answers, not quotes from a Disney movie!” She groaned. “Do you know what she’s on about?”
"Uh."
“Adrien? Are you alright?”
His face had gotten so hot, he was sure he could cook eggs on them.
You can’t tell her. But you can’t lie. His mind was a battlefield of internal hormonal struggle, and he could bet Plagg (and Tikki) were loving every minute of it.
I can’t lie.
“Y-yeah, ehm…” He scratched under his chin. “Wh-when you were, uh, knocked out, your mother asked what you were doing at the Plaza at the time of the Akuma attack, but mainly about why I was with you when I… found you.”
“Yeah…?”
Adrien bit his lip. “I… I told… I didn’t know what else to say. So I just said we were… dating. That I was your boyfriend.”
“O-Oh.”
He couldn’t bear to look at her. Adrien was sure his face rivalled a tomato rather than the esteemed heir of the Agreste family, or even the cocky hero “Chat Noir”. No, he closely resembled a teenager with an awkward crush on two people now blending into one, and he was sure nothing online would help prepare him for that.
Still, he resisted his fear, and took a quick peek at her. Surprisingly, she was staring up at him, albeit nervously, biting her lip.
“I-It’s not the worst thing you could have said to use as a cover story.” She babbled. “A-and, uh, my Mom is pretty perceptive, so it’s best to just… go along with it for now, if she asks.”
“Yeah, alright.”
“…Good.”
The night sky had begun to take centre-stage, and the chill in the air picked up.
“Want to go back inside?”
“Yeah. Please.”
Neither would mention the small smiles on their faces as they went in.