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Levi lay like a broken toy, unable to move, scorched and half dead. He expected to find a bullet lodged into his skull soon, from any one of his countless enemies -and damn them, they kept multiplying. But instead, it's Hange who held him in her arms with a gentleness he never received from anyone. It only existed in his mind as a faded memory, a half remembered dream.
"Tch," he thought with disdain. "This is what it's like to be a fallen soldier. Feels pathetic."
His consciousness faded constantly. He was in a river, the water crashing onto him. Hange's arms were curled around him always, keeping him afloat, his only lifeline. He then lay on grass. Levi braced himself for the sting of the stitches, somewhere between asleep and awake, dead and alive.
Her voice chased him into his sleep, found its way to his limbs and breathed strength into his lungs. Hange wouldn't let him sleep, and for once, he was grateful. She didn't let him slip away, her voice kept him bound to reality. Levi was trapped in the haze of his coma and listened to her unfolding their options now that they were enemies of Paradis.
Her words were warm, they made the cold of the river and the night fade before the phantom smile of her voice, always there even when she was solemn.
"We'll be on the run in this island," she said. We. Her and him, a team, always and forever.
"Even though we think we're doing the right thing, when the time changes we'll find ourselves behind bars." She faltered for a second before she added "Perhaps we should live here together." She thought he didn't listen. It came out naturally, without force, because that's exactly what it would feel like. The two of them against the world, in a constant game of chase. Levi was her team and always would be; Hange didn't want to have it any other way.
When he awoke, he said they should never give up. Hange gave only an acknowledgement that he listened to what she monologued, with a tinge of pink staining her cheeks, but the latter could have been a trick of the fire.
She gazed into his eye -a small insignificant blessing to share two eyes between them, tethered even in their suffering. Her look was soft and relieved, and Levi's matched hers, in a rare moment of vulnerability. The "I'm glad you're here" remained unspoken. They soon went back to weaving plans, together, as they always had.
Just before the reclaiming of the Azumabito ship, Levi struggled to hold his equipment. It would take precision to fight decently again, but he'd never stand to wait in the wings and have them forget all about him.
"You're only human," Hange said. "You have to stoop to our level eventually. See how us common mortals are hurting, Captain." She'd spoken with the usual smile in her voice, and despite living there, in that moment, Levi found himself missing that smile desperately. He wanted to cling onto the remains of older, simpler days, when titans were the enemies, and they weren't complex, they were just titans.
"Does he ever smile?" Eren had wondered out loud one day, back when everything was normal.
"Once," Petra had said. "And Squad Leader Hange was horrified. She screamed so loudly she almost shattered his eardrums. And mine. I think it's more the trauma right now that prevents him from smiling again."
Levi had listened in and cracked a smile, his face obscured by his hood.
"I wasn't that dramatic," Hange had muttered, mounting her horse next to him.
"You're always dramatic."
Only four years ago, they had prepared for their expedition outside the walls. Hange was excited and giddy with the possibility of studying a Titan from up close. "If only I saw an Abnormal out there!"
"We already have one," he'd said dully.
Her eyes had widened and she looked around like an excited toddler. "Huh? Where?"
Levi had grabbed the back of her head, fingers tangling in her ponytail, and brought her face right in front of his. "Right here."
It feels like a lifetime ago, yet Hange remained the same. Brave yet afraid, sure yet self doubting, steady and all over the place. She was everything, dusk and dawn, hope and despair, all of them mixed together into a wonderful mess. Erwin's capable successor.
They've lost whatever kindness they had left. Levi would be selfish to wish for them to get out of it unscratched, after everything he's done. The wish still finds its way in his heart, but it's not himself he wants unharmed.
"This could be the end of the Scouts," Hange says. "Scratch that, it absolutely will be the end of the Scouts. Nothing will be the same after all this is over."
"Then we will go out with a bang."
She smiles and grabs the hilt of her sword. "You'll be okay?"
"I'm always okay," he replied dryly. She smiles one last time and turns around. There's nothing more to say.
"Hange!" Only a moment of hesitation, which he shoves aside. He's Levi Ackerman. He doesn't hesitate. Levi takes two steps until he's in front of her and he braces the back of her head, his grip is strong and slightly off balance because of the missing fingers. The one eye he's got left stares right at hers with determination. "Don't you dare die out there."
After a moment of surprise, she cracks one of her bright smiles. "Don't worry, Levi. There's no way I'm going out like-"
And then he kisses her. He isn't sure why, after all, loss lurks around every corner, waiting to snatch everything away from him. Nevertheless, his lips press against hers, rough from the stitches, and each sting counts as a thank you for saving his life. It catches her by suprise; Hange freezes and her little startled sound is muffled against his mouth. Through closed eyelids, Levi feels the fluttering of hers as they drift shut and she leans into the touch. His hand finds its way to the nape of her neck. The weak spot, as the Scouts will know it always and forever.
They part almost immediately, after all, neither has any real experience and it's not the time to feel awkward.
"I'm repaying you when this is over," Hange whispers, her breath warm against his lips. It's her own pleading to him, to not die until the end. I will be waiting for you, just come back alive.
"Good."
The rumbling approaches the port. Someone has to buy them time until the flying ship is ready for takeoff. Although Levi is prepared, his heart still clenches when Hange offers to stay.
Levi knows that loss lurks around the corner better than anyone, so he's always shoved down anything he felt. At some point, perhaps two years or only five minutes ago, he was stupid enough to imagine what could have been, if things were different.
And it bloody hurt.
Levi is jealous of that other version of himself, of the man who sometimes cracks a smile or two, who can let his guard down and not regret it bitterly. The man who can touch Hange's shoulder without needing a reason to, or reach out and hold her hand, let their fingers intertwine and just have all the time in the world with her.
But Levi is not that version. A rushed kiss doesn't make for years of memories, scattered sweet scenes in unreachable what-ifs. So, he presses his fist against her chest without looking into her eye. Something inside him screams that he will regret not stealing one final glance, however he resists it. "Give your heart," he says simply, and hopes that it encapsulates everything he cannot speak aloud.
"That's the first time I hear you say that."
She understood what he hid into his soul, what he meant to say. She always did. And whatever is left from his heart shatters into ash along with Hange.
Icarus, history will call her, who flew too close to the sun.
But Hange was not a reckless Icarus, she was bright as a star. So, as a star she went out, combusting into a supernova and engulfing everything in the flames with her final goodbye.
Wonderful, charismatic, brave Hange, his Commander, his friend. If only they had had more time.
Levi remains to hold onto his hand, which pressed against her beating heart moments ago. That heart which beat for anything intriguing, and that bright mind of hers, which found beauty in everything. In the end, he's left to dwell on the bitter realisation of how beautifully bright people burn.
Levi doesn't care when he will die, in five months or in fifty years. He's got people on both sides, and he promised Mikasa, albeit half heartedly, to stand on his feet and let his gaze reach only the earth, not beyond. Until it's time to leave.
He remembers the squad he lead, the soldiers he failed. Young kids who never lived to see liberation. He remembers Erwin, strong-willed and stoic, ever the gambler. He remembers Isabel, pretty like a flower, chirpy like a bird, and how lucky he would be to see them again, even from afar.
Levi dies one morning as the sun rays kiss his face, an early greeting from his bright star just before he sees her again. He smiles faintly. In the end, it's just Hange he thinks of. He closes his eyes for one last time. "I'm coming, Commander."
Her hands keep him upright as he stands without a crutch or a wheelchair. Her face fills his vision, and Levi doesn't doubt for a moment what Heaven looks like. Her owlish eye behind glasses -his four-eyes again-, brown hair in a messy ponytail, as if she's just dismounted a horse. They stand on the endless fields outside the walls, forever free.
She grins. "Welcome welcome Captain! You had a long way ahead of you, but you're finally here!"
Levi smiles at her. "Hange."
"Levi."
And the years he spent away from her don't matter anymore, because she's here and they've got all the time in the world. All the time he wants to kick Eren's ass, to hug him and kick him again.
Hange's hands are still on his shoulders. "Erwin's been looking forward to seeing you."
"We've got time for Erwin later. Can't have his nagging just yet."
Hange kisses the tip of his nose. "Yeah. We've got some time." All the time they want. Levi kisses her again, and it feels just right. Hange doesn't miss a beat, she throws her arms around him and reciprocates until they're both breathless -if the dead have a breath. He doesn't care, he can see how long Hange awaited, holding on to the kiss she owed him.
They walk across the endless fields, with the soldiers saluting their Captain and Commander as they pass.
They're young again and together, always and forever.