Chapter Text
“Reg?” The bitter chill settles into James bones, the wind always harsher on the astronomy tower. His body is racked with freezing wind biting at his skin from the harsh winter. The heating charms are in desperate need to be fixed though the teachers have yet to do so.
“James.” Regulus whispers out his voice low and shaken as his body bares the cold head on. He sits on the ledge dangerously so only wearing silk pajamas to combat the cold.
“Why did you want to meet here, you know the cold is harsh?” James got a letter that morning just two days after coming back to school signed R.A.B. When he got the letter his heart fluttered but as he watched Regulus the rest of the day he got more confused. Regulus was sullen, his skin paler than usual and his hair was barely kept. Regulus was unlike himself.
“We can’t talk anymore.” Regulus croaks out as he folds into himself. James stayed rooted in his spot by the stairs, almost statue-like. His heart is stopped and his eyes wide he looks at the wilting creature before shattering him.
“What.” James refused the words leaving his lover's mouth, the cruel words. James shakes his head in tune with his rapid heart beat, the tears raising with his denial. “No.”
“James.”
“Why?” The tears fall as does the joy of seeing his lion heart. The boy he loves tells him no more, telling him they can’t talk without an explanation. James refuses to live with his mind swirling for why he refuses to wander in the forest of unknown heartbreak.
“We just can’t.” Regulus scratches his arm. His left arm. James stops and stares at the movement letting Regulus see he was caught.
“James-”
“Death eater over me?”
“I’m sorry.”
“Your mother over me, over the right thing.” Regulus shivers his body racked with years of guilty weight.
“I’m sorry.”
James nods and turns his tears frozen to his face, the wind blowing away all that he feels. The dark eyes of his greatest desire and his greatest betrayal watch his back. James walks to the stairs and grips the railing like it’s a lifeline.
“I’m sorry James.”
“Okay.”
James walks down the stairs holding in the breakdown and the need for poison. James leaves the broken man he could never fix on the ledge. They never talk again but the souls weep for each other James knows. James walks down the stairs with despair in his heart.