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“You are such an asshole.” Somebody laughs, and everyone in the room tenses. Wally. Bruce relaxes a fraction and he sees Hal and Barry relax as well.
“I learned from the best.” A second laugh, a different voice. Dick. Everyone else relaxes.
“You know Jay still flips out when you start shit-talking him too much.”
“Seriously? I thought he should know better by now.” What are they doing here? And why over the announcing system?
“Well, what else would be expected from the Golden Child?” Wally teases, and Dick audibly groans. They’re bantering… so it's nothing extreme…. I don’t think they know they turned the announcing system on…
“Not you too..” Dick mutters,
“I mean come on. Jay has a point. Who would expect the creator slash leader of the Titans, member of the Justice League…”
“You’re spending too much time with Roy and Jason.” Dick cuts in grumbling.
“... the guy who got Deathstroke to stop trying to kill him.” Wally continues as if Dick never interrupted him.
“Please stop.”
“The protector of Bludhaven…”
“You're the worst.” You could hear Dick's blush. Bruce fought to hide a grin. He was split between pride for his oldest and laughing at Wally's antics. Wally pauses his tirade.
“Oh, my god. I can’t believe this. Batman’s Pride and Joy can’t take compliments.” Wally finally cackles. That’s what breaks the spell of jokes and grins that everyone was listening to. In a split second every single head in the room snaps to Bruce. Fucking West.
“Batman's Pride and Joy?!? Dude what the hell. We’re in the Watchtower. There are cameras here.” Dick hisses, Thank you, Dick.
“Oh fuck.”
“Yeah fuck. B is gonna kill me.” Dick groans,
“Kill you?! Seriously?!?” Wally all but screams, “He’s gonna freeze me to death!?! What about that!?!”
“He wouldn’t… would he…” You’re too innocent for this world Dick…. I would. I definitely would.
“Forget Bats. If Robin finds out about this I’ll have a katana in my back by tomorrow morning.” Wally snaps, and suddenly they heard a whizzing sound.
“FUCK FLASH WAIT! YOU’RE GONNA BURN YOUR CLOTHES! THOSE AREN’T FLASH PROOF!?” Dick screams, Which startles a laugh out of the JLA members. Even Bruce smiles.
"TOO LATE?!" Wally screams back.
"OH MY FUCKING GOD ARE YOU KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW?!" Dick yells back.
"GET ME SOME CLOTHES!" Wally yells,
"WHAT THE FUCK YOUR LITERALLY THE FASTEST MAN ALIVE! THE CAMERAS WILL ONLY SEE A STREAK DO IT YOURSELF!?" Everyone was laughing now.
"Oh right… I'll be right back." Wally says, Dick sighs. There was a long pause. Finally Dick must walk into the hallway to check on Wally because his voice sounds farther away…. Not that he's being quiet….
"WHAT THE FUCK FLASH WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?!" Dick screams, Yeah… not quiet at all.
"I'M GOING AT NORMAL SPEED TO KEEP MY CLOTHES FROM RIPPING!" Wally yells back, What the fuck?
"YOU MORON THAT'S LITERALLY A FUCKING SNAILS PACE. EVEN A 60 YEAR OLD WOMAN WALKS FASTER THAN THAT!?" My god Dick. Bruce thought as everyone in the Hall of Justice himself included collectively lost their shit.
"Just because you’re a speedster doesn't mean you have to fly around like a hummingbird every single second of the day." Dick wasn't yelling anymore. But his voice sounded louder. They must have come into the control room.
"Just because you named yourself after a bird doesn't mean you need to be above ground all of the time." Wally retorts, Dick lets out a startled laugh.
"Touche" They lapse into a comfortable silence for a bit.
"Soooooooo……. Speaking of traumatized individuals….. How's the HH thing going with Hood?" Wally says, HH thing… with Jason? Bruce gives up any chance of salvaging the fact that Dick wasn't his kid. It's for the best I guess…
"What about it? He still can't generate body heat so…. I'm his human heater." Dick responds with a chuckle.
"Ohhh so that's why RR and Robin have been acting pissier than usual." Wally chuckles,
"Bart?"
"Bart."