Work Text:
Bailey was confused; she had been texting the group chat about girls' night. Nyla, Angela, Lucy, and her go out for girls' night once a month. It's just drinks and dinner, but with the women's high-pressure jobs, they all look forward to it. It was Bailey's turn to suggest the type of food and restaurant.
She had suggested Mexican and Margaritas. Everyone agreed and seemed to like the idea. She told them about a place that she and some of her friends from the firehouse went to a few weeks ago: great food, solid Margs, not too busy, which for a Thursday night when they all work the next day is perfect, and the cherry on top is the restaurant is not crazy pricey. Again, the girls seemed excited. She told them the name of the restaurant, Las Torres. Since then, nothing, not a single text, and it had been close to two hours.
She asked John, and he said, "Uhh… that might be because the restaurant you suggested is where Caleb abducted Lucy."
Bailey felt like an idiot; of course, she knew about Caleb, Rosalind, and Lucy; she even knew that Caleb had taken Lucy from a Mexican restaurant. She remembers hearing about the event from the news. However, Bailey wasn't there, like her friends were, so she doesn't remember or know all the details. She was about to text the group chat again, instead suggesting Sushi knowing that it was one of Lucy's favorite foods, when Lucy texted.
Officer Lucy Chen: Wonder Women: 7:45 pm
Sounds great! But Thursday night is the first time in 2 weeks that Tim and I's schedules have completely lined up. Is there any chance we can turn girls' night into group date night?
Bailey Nune: Wonder Women: 7:45 pm
Absolutely! Love that idea!
Officer Angela Lopez: Wonder Women: 7:50 pm
Wesley and I are in the Nanny, and she said she could use a couple of extra hours.
Officer Nyla Harper: Wonder Women: 7:52 pm
James and I are in!
Bailey Nune: Wonder Women: 7:57 pm
Great, see you guys on Thursday!
Thursday night
Tim parks his truck in the parking lot across the street from Los Torres. He sighs and looks over at his girlfriend of seven months in the passenger seat; spinning her moonstone ring, she quickly glances at the building, nervousness flashing in her eyes before she watches her fidgeting fingers.
Tim says, "We can leave whenever you want."
Lucy's beautiful eyes turn to him, shining with appreciation, "Thank you..this is good though…I want to do this…Just…Stay close?"
She knows he will do whatever she asks and also knows that he would be close regardless of what she wants. He knows that she is anxious; hell, he is a little, too; this place has the power to bring back a lot of unpleasant memories for both of them. He is also aware that she had talked to her therapist about what they were doing tonight and that they discussed coping strategies. Her therapy session was a lot this week, but he was so proud of her and all her work. They have a plan. If it became too much, they had a plan, using a strategy he used with her after Caleb the first time.
"Of course." It's all Tim needs to say to make her feel more calm.
She sighs and nods, "Okay, let's go."
"Let's go."
Tim gets out of the truck, walks around it, opens Lucy's door, and holds her hand as they walk to the restaurant.
When they get inside, Tim stands behind her, holding both her hands at her side with their fingers interlaced. Lucy looks around the place, taking it all in with a sigh. Tim kisses the back of her head before pointing out their friends in a booth in the back corner.
Tim lets Lucy set the pace, not rushing her to move; he follows when she walks towards their friends. Tim motions for Lucy to sit in the last open spot in the booth, facing the door so she has a visual on as much of the space as possible. He will sit right next to her. He knows all of their friends have their cop eyes working extra tonight, but he also knows they will make Lucy comfortable and want her to have a good time. No one will be drinking more than a few drinks tonight.
"Mango Margarita?" Tim asks Lucy.
"Yeah, thanks."
"Be right back." She nods at his words.
While Tim is at the bar, Lucy watches him. He is at the end of the bar farthest from her, his eyes tracking the bartender's every move as he makes the Margarita and opens a beer bottle. While the bartender runs Tim's credit card, Tim takes the first sip of Lucy's Margarita.
He knew what she went through; he knows as much about what happened to her during her abduction as he can. He also knows that sometimes, when she is out, her drinks don't always taste right to her. Most of the time, she won't tell him that is the case. She just pushes the drink to the side and will drink water.
Lucy swears she has never been as in love with anyone as she is with Tim at that moment. With that one small action, he made her relax a little more. Tim does not like Tequila. The only time she ever sees him drink it is when she or Angela convinces him to do shots, Which is extremely rare, or after she has had a few drinks and still tastes like her favorite spirit. Yet, there he is, showing her that she is safe, protected, and loved, with such a small action she is not even sure she is meant to see.
When Tim returns to the table with the drinks, he sits next to her and smiles. She gives him a small smile back. They listen to Bailey talk about a crazy call she had early in the week, snacking on chips and salsa. Lucy is laughing at the story when the bust boy tripped over a leg of a chair and dropped a stack of plates, the plates crashing and making a loud noise that causes everyone to startle. While everyone else recovers quickly, it takes Lucy a little longer.
Tim takes her hand, interlacing their fingers, his thumb rubbing the top of her hand in her lap, and whispers in her ear, "Tell me five things you smell."
This was the coping strategy they talked about. Tim would do with her after she was taken when they had a rough moment or call. He would pick one of the senses and have her tell him five things she notices. Tim would do it throughout the day or shift as a way to have her focus and come back to the present. But before they said good night at the end of their shift, he always made sure they made it through all five senses. It calmed her and reminded her she was safe.
They never really talked about it; he would just tell her a sense, and she would answer. Then, when she brought up going to dinner with her therapist, her therapist suggested having a strategy to check in, and Lucy asked Tim to ask her his questions.
"I smell the fruity mango in my drink, the salsa," she tucks her nose into his shoulder and places a kiss there, "your cologne, the food from the other table, and the beer from the pitcher that the waiter just walked by with."
Tim nods, letting her know her answers were sufficient.
And James asks, "Lucy, how's Tamara?"
Lucy is thankful for the question as it gives her a distraction to focus on, and she gets to brag about her roommate and how well she is doing at school. Tim smiles, listening to the happiness in her voice.
The waiter comes and takes the table's orders. The group was having a great time, but Lucy was jittery, her feet bouncing incessantly, Tim's and hers entwined hands going up and down with her legs as they bounced. That's when Tim whispered in her ear, "Five things you feel."
Lucy took a deep breath, focusing on her environment, "my feet on the floor…the cracked vinyl of the booth…my moon ring on my finger."
Tim knows the significance of her saying that it means she is reminding herself that she is a survivor before she continues, "the weight of my earrings in my ears they are heavy… and your thumb rubbing backing and forth on my hand."
She brings their hands up to her lips kissing the back of his hand before putting it back in her lap. He knows that Lucy wouldn't believe him if he told her, but that action settled him in only she could, reminding him she was safe. Her lips pushed his negative feelings about where they were away.
Later, their food comes, and she is devouring her quesadilla; he could tell she was barely half listening to James' latest story about Silas and his latest directing endeavor; the joy, over her food is priceless. She had relaxed, which was great. She looks like she is in food heaven.
So he gently demands, "Five things you taste."
She takes a sip of her Margarita, "the sugar from the rim." she takes a bite of quesadilla after dipping it in her plate, "The guac…the cheese…" she dips her piece of quesadilla again… "sour cream… veggies.."
Lucy doesn't know when she realized that Tim hadn't eaten, but she looks at her nearly pristine plate to his still with an untouched burrito and realizes that his hand holding hers since he sat down is still in hers, his thumb rubbing back and forth soothingly. His touch grounding her. But he needs to eat; he had a call this afternoon and worked through lunch. His meal needed to be eaten with two hands, whereas she could eat hers one-handed. She tried to remove her hand from his, but his grip only tightened, not letting her move her hand. She leans in and whispers in ear, "You need to eat."
"I'm fine."
Was the only response she got before he turned back to Nolan to continue talking about the latest Doggers game.
Lucy stares at him, knowing he won't let her hand go without a reason. So, for a few minutes, she sits and listens to Wesley and Angela as they talk about Jack and their daughter. Then she gets out of the booth, standing, "I am going to the-" She glances up, and at some point, a man and woman come in and sit at the bar. The couple was sitting in the same seats she and Caleb sat in. She didn't see the man's face, but for a moment, she was transported back in time. She was looking at the woman at the bar while strangely seeing herself, laughing and flirting with the guy in front of her. She heard Nyla call her name. It shakes her out of her thoughts, "Ah, I'm gonna go to the bathroom."
Lucy pulls her hand from Tim's grasp and walks toward the bathroom. She hears the girls tell Tim they've 'got it' as they follow her.
When the women get to the bathroom, Lucy is already splashing water on her face at the sink. They all stand in the back of the room, giving her space; she looks at them through the mirror. All three of the women wearing looks of understanding and concern.
"It was so strange; it was like I was watching myself sitting at the bar, laughing. The guy was even dressed like Caleb… not that that's hard."
She grabs paper towels to dry her hands.
"Sometimes, it still gets me. How much it still affects me…"
"That's normal." Angela says, "It happens to all of us. Things get easier, but the scars are still there."
"That's why when you are affected by it, you surround yourself with safe people who understand you and have your back," Nyla adds.
"And we do. We have your back." Bailey confirms.
"I know. Thanks, guys."
Angela takes her phone out and reads a text, "Tell her to tell you five things she sees."
Lucy smiles at her boyfriend, his need to protect her.
"I see your mothers Day bracelet..the scuffs on my boots…splashes of water on the mirror… crumpled up paper towels on the floor, the name Liam with a giant X through it etched in the bathroom stall."
Lucy notices Angela texting and says, "Tell him I'm not leaving till he eats something."
Tim Bradford: 8:05 pm
Tell her to tell you five things she sees.
Tim Bradford: 8:05 pm
She knows what it means.
Tim Bradford: 8:05 pm
Tell me what she says.
Angela: 8:06 pm
She says my Mother's Day bracelet, the scuffs on her boots, splashes of water on the mirror, crumpled up paper towels on the floor, and the name Liam with a giant X through it etched in the bathroom stall.
Angela: 8:06 pm
She also says she won't leave till you eat.
By the time the group of women makes it back to the table, the waitress is passing out checks and a takeout box for Tim's now half-eaten burrito. Once all the bills are settled, Tim and Lucy say goodbye to their friends. They walk to the truck with her hand wrapped around his arm and his fingers brushing her thigh. Tim opens the door of her side of the car before walking around to his side.
Once they are both in the truck, they release a big sigh. Tim places his hand on her cheek, getting her attention. "
I'm so proud of you, Baby."
Her eyes light up at his pride, "thank you."
Tim leans, giving her one of his earth-shattering kisses. When they let out of the kiss, Tim asks, "Home?"
Lucy nods firmly, "Please."
She takes his hand over the counsel after he has pulled out of the parking lot.They are driving in silence, with the radio playing quietly. Lucy is looking out her window with a dazed expression.
"Tell me five things you hear."
She looks at her boyfriend driving, "The engine… the guitar in the song playing… the sirens clearly a few streets over… someone's car alarm…the jingle of the key chain as the truck moves."
When they walk into the apartment, they know they are alone; Tim let Tarama use his house for a study session/movie night with her friends so long as they walk and feed Kojo. While he takes care of his leftovers, Lucy immediately goes to the bedroom. When he walks in, she is shirtless in silk pajama shorts. He sees her tattoo as she walks to the hamper, takes his long-sleeved Metro shirt that he wore today, and puts it on, Lucy wanting to be totally surrounded by him.
He walks into the bathroom and brushes his teeth. When he is done, Lucy is standing in the doorway watching him. He walks up to her, remembering what she said earlier about how the earrings felt heavy in her ears. She immediately feels lighter when he takes the dangly jewelry out of her ears. He gives her the bathroom. When Lucy enters the bedroom again, Tim is in grey sweatpants and a faded LAPD t-shirt. He had plugged in their phones and grabbed her favorite fuzzy blanket from the closet. Tim sits on the bed and pats the space between his legs. Lucy sits between his legs and leans back into his chest as he puts the blanket around them. He turns on Top Chef. It's the episode they watched last night, but if Lucy notices, she doesn't say anything.
They are about halfway through the episode when Lucy starts silently uncontrollably sobbing, her body shaking. Tim doesn't freak out; he is calm as he sits up. One of his hands sneaks under her shirt and places it over her tattoo, as he is the only man to touch it. That brings them both comfort. And he tucks his face into her neck, placing kisses into her neck and whispering things in between each kiss, "You are okay…Take deep breaths... I've got you, Baby… you are safe."
She sniffles, "No… it's not that." She twists in his body so she faces him. "I mean, yes, today was hard. But that's not why I'm crying."
She sniffles again, feeling she can explain. "Sometimes I'm overwhelmed with how in love I am with you."
Tim gives a small smile, "okay… and that's a bad thing?" he asks, trying to understand this reaction.
"No. Uhm. Do you remember a few months ago when you had to pick me up from my Saturday yoga class because my car was getting serviced?"
He thinks for a second, nodding when he does.
"Well, my friend Sarah and I walked out of the class; you had come from your pick-up basketball game, you were leaning against the truck, and you had this look on your face when you saw me. Sarah saw the look, too, because she said, 'Wow, girl, you fell first, but he fell harder.' I guess between the look you gave me and the way I talked about us, she meant that I had feelings for you first, but you love me more… and I just hate how she said it because I am so in love with you that it hurts. How could you love me more than that? If you ever felt like I didn't love you… Like tonight, you took the first sip of my Margarita. I don't know if you even know if you knew that I saw, but I did. I swear I've never been more in love with someone than I was when you did that. And I don't know what I would do if-"
Tim cuts her off, knowing if he didn't, she would just continue to rant, "I love you."
He moves her so that she is in his lap, holding her face in his palms, ensuring that she is looking at him when he says what's next, "I love you, Lucy. Nothing in a relationship is ever 50/50. Some days, I need more from you; some days, you need more from me. That's how it goes, okay? But no one can tell you what we feel for each other. I know you love me. You and I are good. We put in the work and will continue to, just like we always have when it comes to our relationship. I've never been this in love either." Lucy tucks herself into his chest. "Thanks, I really needed to know that."
"Babe, you already did. You just needed reminding." He kisses the top of her head.
Later that night, they were in bed, trying to sleep, though sleep was not coming. Tim rolls over and kisses his girlfriend's temple, whispering,"I love you Boot."
Lucy turns so she can look at him despite the darkness. "What's that?" He hears the bewilderment in her voice.Tim doesn't call her that anymore.
"I said I love you Boot. I love your smile, honesty, strength, loyalty, and your trusting nature.Those are the five things I love most about you. When I need to focus on myself while on the job, I remember the five things I love most about you. You center me."