Chapter Text
Ryder was sitting in the living room of his parents’ house, reading a book. He hears a knock on the door. “…Odd.” He thought. It was evening time…Who would be visiting? Ryder sighs, slightly annoyed at the disruption. He puts the book on the table next to the couch and gets up and walks over to the front door. He peeks into the hole and sees reddish-orange hair….Jack? No…This hair is slightly less frizzy and curly. He looks down to the face. Ugh. It’s him. Should he really open the door?… Oh, why not…Maybe he could finally get revenge for what he did. Attacking him, clawing at him on the island wasn’t enough. No, he needs more. He needs Gluttony to know how much it hurt him to see one of his friends being brutally eaten alive. Sloth would’ve wanted him to-…No. He…He wouldn’t. Sloth forgives so, so very easily. Sloth would never….
Ryder decides to open the door. He pulls the door open and lo and behold, it is in fact, Gluttony. “…What are you doing here?” Ryder growled. Gluttony’s body flinches at the tone, but he tries to speak, “…I’m so sorry for this, but…Could I come in?” He asked carefully. Ryder noticed his limbs were shaking. Why? Was it cold outside? It didn’t feel that cold… “…Sure. Yeah, come on in.” Why did he say that? Why is he allowing this murderer into the Emerson house? Why- “Thank you, Ryder…I…I really appreciate it…” He heard Gluttony reply. He feels a breeze pass by him when Gluttony brushes past him to walk into the house. He dared not to go any further than just a few steps though, he didn’t want to make Ryder angry. He knew what angry Ryder looked like.
“…S-so…Um…” Gluttony looks at the ground as he speaks. He’s avoiding eye contact, Ryder noted that. Before Gluttony can say anything else, Ryder reaches for his hand to guide him through the house. The ginger boy flinches again and pulls his hands away from Ryder’s range. Ryder gets a little irritated by this. “…Do you want to sit in the living room and tell me why you’re here?” The dirty blonde asked impatiently. Gluttony shivers a little, “U-uh…Yeah sure.” And with that, he follows Ryder into the living room and they both sit on the couch.
There’s an uncomfortable silence between them. It lasted for a few minutes before Gluttony finally broke it, “I’m sorry for coming, again. I just…I didn’t know who else to go to…for this…” Ryder could hear Gluttony’s voice shaking. He felt like he knew what this was. What it’s…becoming. An anxiety attack? “…For what?” Ryder asked, genuinely curious. Gluttony looks at him with trembling hands. He quickly mutters, “I-…feel bad. Horrible. I can’t stop shaking. I’m scared-“ ….‘I’m scared’?…Ryder didn’t think he’d hear that phrase again. He’s heard it over and over. Different people said it. But…When Gluttony said it…It felt…satisfying. It felt like Ryder was getting revenge. Ryder’s thoughts stop when he sees tears threatening to form in Gluttony’s eyes.
“…Are you okay?” Ryder asked surprisingly gently. Gluttony lets the tears form and fall down his cheeks. He doesn’t understand what’s wrong with this guy. Why in the hell is he crying? “N-no…I’ve been having…Nightmares- or well…Something like nightmares since we got back from the island…I can’t hold it in anymore…” Gluttony starts to sob into his hands. Ryder has never really seen him like this since…That night…He gets an urge. He decides to act on it. “…May I…Hug you?” Ryder asked. He’s surprised the question even exited his mouth. Gluttony seemed surprised too, as he lowered his hands to his lap and let Ryder see his tear-stained face.
The ginger didn’t say anything but he simply nodded. With that, Ryder carefully wraps his arms around Gluttony’s body, one arm around his upper back and the other around his lower back. He pulled Gluttony in towards him, engulfing him into an embrace. Gluttony is frozen with fear, scared that this might be a trick. Scared that Ryder will try to squeeze him to death. However, this never happens. Ryder just holds him close to his chest for a few minutes before speaking, “…It’s okay to be scared…Just breathe.” He calmly instructed.
Gluttony realizes that he isn’t breathing and he takes a deep breath but it sounds more like a desperate gasp of air. Ryder rubs his hands in synchronized motions up and down Gluttony’s back. “There we go…” Ryder whispered in a slightly satisfied tone. Gluttony keeps trying to take deep breaths by following Ryder’s breathing. Ryder now purposely breathes deeply to help guide him.
Gluttony starts to calm down, but the thoughts come back. The memories. The screaming. His screaming. Sloth’s- “I’m so sorry- I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry-“ Gluttony starts to profusely apologize into Ryder’s shirt. Ryder knows exactly what he’s apologizing about. He’s done it many times before. This time…It sounds more desperate. Like he needs forgiveness. Ryder still isn’t going to give it to him just yet. He’s not ready. He doesn’t think he will ever be ready…but he can try to soothe him. “Garroth, hey Garroth…You’re having a panic attack- listen to me-“ Ryder gently holds Gluttony’s face up so they can see each other. Gluttony’s face is about as red as his hair. He looks at Ryder with teary eyes.
“…I’m sorry-“ Ryder interrupts him and he puts a finger on Gluttony’s lips, “Stop that. Shush. Stop apologizing. I’m not forgiving you…..But I do think we could help each other.” Ryder sighs. He gently pulls Gluttony closer and he lays back on the couch with Gluttony now resting his head on his chest. “…What do you mean?” Gluttony asked. Ryder pats some of the ginger’s hair, some of it had strands sticking up. Gluttony seems to like this and immediately stops asking further questions.
Ryder enjoys the silence for a bit before answering, “Comfort. We can…Comfort each other. Like right now, this is comforting to you, is it not?” He looked down to see Gluttony’s face buried in his chest. The ginger nods. Ryder smiles. “…So we can comfort each other. We can’t forget what happened, that’s not exactly a good thing. We could…try to move on from it though. Maybe…” Ryder trails off. He doesn’t want to put words into a dead Sloth’s mouth, but he feels like this is true, so he continues. “…Maybe we could…Be friends. I think…I think that Sloth would want that…” Ryder starts to tear up as he mentions Sloth’s name. He sighs again, getting rid of the tears by wiping his face with his arm and then putting his arm back down onto Gluttony, resting it on his upper back once again.
Gluttony doesn’t say anything for a while, but he does slowly stop apologizing and crying. Finally, he speaks up through Ryder’s shirt, “…Yeah…I’d…I would like that…” he murmured. “…Good, then…” Ryder lays there. He doesn’t exactly know what to do. Gluttony seems to have calmed down, though; so he rests on the couch, closing his eyes. He feels Gluttony become a little heavier, he must’ve fallen asleep on top of him. He can’t quite see because Gluttony’s hair is in the way of his face. Ryder slowly drifts off to sleep as well. Maybe, just maybe…They could help each other move on from their shared trauma.