Chapter Text
Waking up one morning, it takes Mark more than a couple of seconds to comprehend where he is and how he’s feeling.
Oh, it’s going to be one of those days.
The fact that Mark himself is aware of how he’s feeling and what it means goes to show just how in tune he is with his feelings and emotions. But in true Mark fashion, instead of using this self awareness and doing something about it, he chooses to do the complete opposite. He ignores it.
Mark, based on these results, it looks like you have high-functioning anxiety and minor depression. I’m worried that with your life-style, these can easily change into something more consistent and serious. I’m going to be prescribing you some antidepressants to help you out with some of the symptoms okay?
Mark can clearly hear his doctor’s voice echo in his brain though his mind does nothing else beyond just letting the words float and disappear. It doesn’t linger nor does it spark anything else in Mark’s response except to continue to lay there, eyes closed, basking in the silence of his room. Letting out a slow, heavy breath, Mark works his eyes open to stare at his barren ceiling, much similar to how he’s feeling inside. It should scare him. It doesn’t.
Looking off to the side of his desk, he sees the bright red glow of his clock showing off in big blocked numbers. 11:34. Looks like he skipped breakfast. Again.
Right next to his clock lies scattered pieces of music that he’s been looking through, his glasses and glasses case, and a water bottle. New to the addition though is an inconspicuous white bottle. Eyes zooming on the bottle, he gingerly raises his arm to grab it, bringing it close to his face to examine the title.
Antidepressants. Prescribed to a one Mark Lee. Take 2 per day.
It’ll take a while for the medication to sink in and for the effects to show but I believe this will help you for your everyday and professional life. You just need to take 2 per day for now and we’ll see about changing it up if necessary.
Blinking slowly, Mark stares at it a bit longer before slowly reaching back out, opening his desk drawer, dropping the bottle in, and closing the drawer shut.
He allows himself to close his eyes after that, basking once again in the silence.
His eyes open once again, this time it’s some time in the middle of the evening. The clock next to him blares a bright 4:13. Looks like he skipped lunch. Taking a deep breath in, Mark knows it won’t be long before his members come to check in on him to see how he’s doing. Robotically putting aside his blanket, Mark swings his legs over the edge of his bed.
Hesitantly, Mark glances again at his desk drawer. Slowly, he reaches out to open his desk drawer, grabbing onto and bringing back the bottle back into his eye view. He looks at it contemplatively for a moment.
“Mark?” a knock sounds at his door. Startled, Mark drops the bottle back into his drawer and slams it shut just as his door opens to reveal Jaehyun behind it.
“We were thinking tteokbokki for dinner…” Jaehyun's voice trails off as he takes in Mark’s position on his bed and the state of his hair and clothes indicating he had just gotten up.
“Did you just get up?” Jaehyun asks curiously. Everyone knows Mark is usually an early riser, even on days that they don’t have any schedule, which is admittedly pretty rare in Mark’s case. Probably one of the factors.
Mark clears his throat, looking away in embarrassment but not being able to deny or come up with a good enough excuse in the moment.
“...well uh tteokbokki for dinner?” Jaehyun awkwardly continues, noticing Mark’s discomfort.
Mark nods at that, hand coming up to rub the back of his neck. “Yeah, that sounds good hyung,” his raspy voice comes out.
“Okay…” Jaehyun hesitates for a moment but decides against whatever was holding him back, stepping back out and closing Mark’s door after he leaves. Letting out a slight huff of relief, Mark only spares his desk drawer one last glance before getting up from his bed fully to use the bathroom. He’s back to himself, cheery and joining in the conversation at dinner, that Jaehyun forgets the weird interaction from before, writing it off as a one off thing.