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High school wasn’t easy for Hansol. As an incoming freshman, his awkward self grew anxious by the crowded hallways and cliques of people that walked past him.
His first few classes were okay since he was with a few of his friends from middle school. He saw Minghao in first block Language Arts, Chan in second block World History, and Seungkwan, his best friend, in forth block Biology. But third block was different.
Third block was Band. The class was large and filled with students who were much older than him. It was intimidating, but he was standing in the percussion section right behind a cute trumpeter.
Hong Jisoo was a senior and has been taking Band since middle school, ranking him first chair in his section. Hansol soon found out he also sung and played guitar, which was quite impressive. During sectionals, Hansol would sneak over to the trumpets just to talk to his new older friend.
Soon the two started waving at each other in the hallway on their way to classes. Jisoo’s group of friends kept teasing him for knowing freshmeat and Hansol’s friends kept praising him for knowing an upperclassman.
Sometimes, Jisoo called Hansol over to join him and his friends for lunch. Hansol was quiet alongside Jisoo, but he opened up to the older ones who grew fond of him.
“He’s adorable,” Seungcheol chuckled. “I’ll adopt him as my son.” The whole table laughed, including Hansol, as he felt welcomed.
Jisoo invited Hansol to his house on the weekends and their friendship blossomed. They jammed to music, they cooked, they watched movies, they did everything together.
It wasn’t long before Jisoo caught feelings. He kept denying them though, feeling awkward from their age gap. But Hansol responded well to the acts of flirtation. It threw Jisoo off-guard and in even more denial until Hansol asked Jisoo out on a date.
Jisoo was a blushing mess when they went out, learning how affectionate Hansol could be. But it was adorable, he thought.
Holding hands on dates turned to holding hands in the hallway and Jisoo dropping Hansol off to his classes, running to his classes within two minutes before the bell rang.
This pattern continued until the end of the school year hit.
At graduation, Hansol screamed the loudest and blew the air horn as Jisoo’s name was called, embarrassing him, himself, and their friends. But Hansol didn’t care, it made Jisoo laugh as he walked across the stage.
They had one summer together before Jisoo moved to his university where he would be dorming and they made the most of it. Camping, campfires, beach trips, amusement park dates, watching the stars, staying up until three in the morning, kissing under the rain, sharing ice cream in the hot heat, they did it all.
It wasn’t long until Jisoo closed the back of his car and sighed sadly as he looked at Hansol.
Hansol tried his best not to cry, but he sniffled as he pulled Jisoo in for a sincere and tight hug.
“You’ll call me every night, right?”
“Of course,” Jisoo chuckled as he pulled back.
They shared a sweet, long kiss before Jisoo waved at Hansol through the car window and headed for a new chapter in his life.
The first few weeks, Jisoo called every night to talk to Hansol. The younger was always eagerly awaiting the call and they talked until Hansol passed out early since high school began before Jisoo’s first class.
They caught up, told each other about their new friends, complained about teachers and professors. Jisoo kept saying that he should have separated his classes more so he could have time to socialize more. Hansol nodded, but couldn’t really get what Jisoo meant.
After the first month, the calls were less frequent, Jisoo only calling at most three times a week.
Hansol noticed, but didn’t seem to mind. He was just happy to talk. Hansol updated Jisoo that he got into the science honor society, an extracurricular that Jisoo was secretary of.
Jisoo was impressed and congratulated his boyfriend, but he quickly changed the subject, making Hansol a bit sad. But he shrugged it off as he listened intently.
It came to the point where Hansol was the one sending morning texts, something Jisoo has usually done since high school. Jisoo always responded with a quick three word response or a heart. Hansol frowned at this, but Jisoo was a university student. He was probably busy.
Hansol started noticing Jisoo’s pattern and confronted him about it, only to feel guilty.
“I need to focus on my studies,” Jisoo said. “These courses are harder, you wouldn’t understand.” But Hansol understood. Loud and clear.
Ever since then, Hansol has always been worried about losing Jisoo. Nights when Hansol waited for the call by his bedside, he looked through his phone at the pictures they took. Jisoo always tried to hide his face or cover the camera since he hated pictures, but he always managed to smile because of Hansol, which made the younger happy. At least Jisoo still made him smile.
One Friday, Hansol was surprised to be called down to the front office. He thought he was in trouble, panicking that the school probably caught him feeding the bunnies in the biology classes more lettuce than usual. He gasped, seeing Jisoo waiting for him there.
The two shared a hug before Hansol pulled back. “H-hyung? What are you doing here?”
Jisoo put his finger to Hansol’s lips before pecking his nose. “I told them I was picking you up to go to an appointment.” And he snickers before pulling on Hansol’s hand and bringing him to his car to leave.
The two spent the whole day together, going out to eat, watch a movie in theaters, and go back to Hansol’s house where Jisoo slept in his bed. This was surprising in many ways to Hansol.
First, Jisoo definitely had classes on Friday, meaning he skipped class just to get Hansol. Jisoo was a strong advocate of never skipping class unless it was a dire emergency. Second, Jisoo actually paid. He never had money on him, there were many times where Hansol had to pay for their dates. Third, since when did Jisoo drive?
“You’re acting… different,” Hansol whispered as the two cuddled underneath the covers of his bed.
“Different?” Jisoo asked as he tilted his head and entangled their legs together. “Is it bad?”
Hansol smiled and leaned in to kiss his nose. “No, it’s a good different.” Jisoo smiled as the two shared a proper kiss. “I like this new Jisoo.”
But that likability didn’t last for long.
Jisoo continued his strange pattern of not calling, not texting, not doing anything to try to keep Hansol company or at least tell him that he’s still trying his best with his relationship.
Because the truth was, Jisoo wasn’t trying at all.
It was a bit cowardly, but the next phone conversation he had with Hansol was their last as a couple.
Once he hung up, Hansol curled up in his bed, hugged the pillow, and cried his eyes out. He couldn’t believe it. Denial flowed through his entire body as he shook his head, telling himself this was just a dream. But all of this was reality. It’s as if part of Hansol’s life just walked away from him.
Jisoo didn’t know what to feel. He felt neither sad nor mad. Neither happy nor content. He just knew things were going to be different.
And things were very different.
Hansol was still sad when he was at school, walking down the hallways and remembering how him and Jisoo walked down each hallway as he dropped him off to his classes. Seungkwan helped him a lot though. His best friend kept telling him he’ll get through it.
Jisoo was another story. He found himself always glancing at his phone, waiting. He knew it wasn’t going to happen, but he always thought that, just maybe, he’ll get a call or a quick text. But he never did.
He was invited to a party on campus though. Jisoo wasn’t much of a party animal, but he thought he might as well since things are different now.
That’s where he met Jeonghan, a blond beauty who’s hair went down to his shoulders. Jisoo thought it was charming, which surprised Jeonghan because most people were intimidated by it. The two grew close, almost doing everything him and Hansol did in their courtship.
Almost everything.
They connected so well. Jeonghan seriously felt this spark between him and Jisoo, which was why he asked him out.
Jisoo was shocked and flattered, but something in him couldn’t say yes to the question. He kept saying he’ll think about it, he’ll think this out first since he just broke up with someone. But that was only an excuse. Jisoo knew he couldn’t commit to Jeonghan now, nor could he ever.
It wasn’t normal to do so, but this was a different Jisoo after all, right? He laid in his bed while listening to the songs that Hansol recommended him before he left for school last year. Jisoo’s eyes were closed as he let himself indulge into the melody and lyrics.
That was one thing that connected Jisoo and Hansol: music. They met in band class, of course it was a big part of their lives.
Jisoo turned to his side and looked through his phone, looking at old photos they took of each other, reading conversations they had. Hansol may have deleted JIsoo out of his phone, but Jisoo didn’t. Hansol still had a heart next to his name in his contact book and, truthfully, Jisoo didn’t want to change that.
Unknowingly, Hansol was on the same page.
He wasn’t aware of Seungkwan’s feelings for him until it was brought up, asking if Hansol wanted to join him to the dance that was coming up. Hansol decline his best friend, saying he’ll skip the dance and go next year. In reality, Hansol didn’t want to relive the moments he shared with Jisoo.
The night of the dance, Hansol watched videos of Jisoo playing guitar and singing on his phone in bed. He went to his messages and scrolled to see one chat without a name, knowing it was Jisoo’s number. Hansol sighed as he went to edit it back to Jisoo’s name with two hearts on each side.
He played that one song that him and Jisoo both loved. The same song that Jisoo was playing at the exact moment.
The two were laying in their own beds, listening to the same chord progression, the same lyrics, the same beat, the same rhythm, thinking about each other at the same time. That was one thing that didn’t change about either of them despite all of this, they were still in sync with one another.
Because they were everything they knew.