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All Nico could think of was "why?"
Why now?
Why, of all times in the world, would Lewis show he cared now?
Of all the opportunities he'd created for Lewis to look past the mask he wore every day, now; when Nico was leaving; did he decide that he cared?!
Wow.
Just wow.
He really couldn't get to that conclusion sooner?
He really couldn't realize sooner that something might be wrong with his best friend?
If that's what they still were.
Nico hoped they were, but Lewis had firmly dampered that hope.
......Well, we're not friends ......
Well. If they weren't......Then why was Lewis suddenly offering his help?
Right now.
At this moment.
Yeah......
This sudden 'caring' really made him feel like a ----
"I'm not some charity case, okay? I don't need your pity."
Like exactly that.
Lewis' facial expression changed dramatically, but Nico couldn't make himself care.
Hah. How ironic.
"It's not pity."
"No? Explain to me. What is it then?"
Lewis had the audacity to huff.
"Can't I just offer some help as a friend?"
Nico narrowed his eyes. "I thought we weren't friends?"
Nico saw the cogs starting to work in Lewis' mind on his face.
"I didn't mean that - - -"
"Didn't you?"
"I don't know! Maybe I did at that moment - - -"
"So you did mean it."
"I...."
Nico stopped him with a single raise of his hand.
"Just stop, Lewis. You don't really want to help me." his words were cold. His voice bitter, "and I'm not willing to take it. So, it's best to forget about this."
Lewis went quiet. What was he supposed to say?
"I still don't see you as a charity case." Voice soft. Too soft.
"Please. Spare me."
And Nico left. Like he decided to do in that exact moment.
Another year - - - no. Just one other moment like this would kill him.
So he walks away.
There was a time where he'd choose Lewis over anything.
But this time, he chose to live.