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The pair of death metal musicians were dark and evil. Blacker than the blackest black times one hundred, as Nathan liked to say. Here he sits with Pickles on a couch in the Mordhaus living room, eyes fixated on the larger than ever necessary screen.
“A secretive talking mouse is pretty fucking metal. Think about it. He’s got that ‘it’s a surprise tool that will help us later’ going on and shit. Leaves room for speculation, then you’re disappointed when it’s not as good as you had imagined in the end. That’s fucking brutal, dude.”
Pickles was leaning back with a blank expression and a casual blunt hanging from his mouth. “I dunno, Nate, this isn’t what I was expecting when you said you wanted to do something different for our friender bender.”
“Uhh, if you still want to drink a lot and flip off national monuments later that’s fine I suppose. But… Mickey, man. It’s Mickey fucking Mouse. In his evil metal clubhouse.”
“I don’t really…” he takes a drag, “I don’t really see the vision here.”
“You don’t think Mickey Mouse is metal?”
“Not-- hey, hey, Nate are you… crying?” Now Pickles was seriously concerned. Nathan would never, ever, in a million years, cry in front of someone. Never.
“NO! I’m not, sniff, crying and emotions would, sniff, be gay!”
“Well, first off, we’ve been dating now for--”
“Oh wowee!” Suddenly, the pair feel the unoccupied end of the couch jolt as none other than Toki Wartooth jumps onto it. Nathan hurriedly turns away and wipes his face. “It’s the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse!” But his beaming smile was quickly wiped from his face when he thought about it a little more. “Why ams I never allowed to puts these shows on the big screens but you ams?”
“Well, uhh, whenever you want to show us your pony show it’s during our meetings with Charles. This is our friender bender.”
“Amsen’t your friender benders usually travellinks, drinkinks, flippings off the national monuments and stuff?”
“Nate’n was bored of that, or something, I dunno dood.” Pickles took another drag, trying to get high enough to be chill with the current circumstances.
“Not bored. Just, uhh, wanting to switch it up a bit. Also, I already said we could still do those things.”
“Yeah, yeah, okey. Anyways. Toki, can you leave us alone now so we can continue friender bender-ing?”
“Aw man. Why can’ts Toki watch the Mickey Mouse Clubhouses with you twos?”
“See you later, Toki.” Nathan agreed.
Toki frowned but finally left the room. Nathan directed his attention back to the screen and Pickles sat in silence watching Nathan more than said screen. The whole situation was a little funny, he had to admit that at least. Eventually, the ending theme played and the credits rolled.
Nathan even smiled a bit. One of his small, contorted smirks that didn’t fit his usually pissed-off looking face. “That was fucking awesome.” It didn’t take long for the next installment to appear on screen. Pickles sank a little further into his seat, accepting his fate. “Pickles. We should try to get through season one.”
“Yeah? You, you think so?” Drag.
“Shush. It’s starting.” Hence started another ten minutes or so of Pickles doing drugs and staring at Nathan while the latter glued his eyes to the screen, barely even blinking. The infrequency of his blinks was actually a little impressive, Pickles thought. Until his train of thoughts were shattered by a certain Swedish accent.
“I thinks I left my favorites guitars pick in here-- oh. Pff…. PFFFT--” Skwisgaar immediately doubled over in laughter upon viewing the scene before him.
“Hush,” Nathan scolded and waved him off without even looking in the blonde’s direction.
“Whatevors,” Skwisgaar was still giggling as he started digging through a pile of stuff on an end table. “Theres you ams,” He said to himself when he finally found his pick.
“Mickey! It was Donald!” Nathan was yelling at the screen while biting a nail. Skwisgaar snickered at him and looked over to Pickles who simply shrugged.
“Nothing ams that faskinatings about this dildos show. You’re here too, Pickle?” Skwisgaar could not help the urge to shit on his bandmates. He simply had to. If he did not at every opportunity, he was sure he would explode.
“Get out, Skwisgaar, we are having our friender bender with Mickey Mouse.” Nathan scolded for the second time that day. Two times too many. Why did the best screen have to be in such a busy area of Mordhaus?
“Nej, I wants to watch the dildos show with you now. For the laughs, obviousklies.” He leaned over the back of the couch between Nathan and Pickles.
“Out, out, shoo,” Nathan tried again.
“Sahrry Skwis,” Pickles agreed. He wanted to get back to staring at Nathan in peace, and could not through Skwisgaar’s long hair.
Skwisgaar scoffed but let up. “Whatevors, I was goings to go have sex with the groupies anyways,” he said as he finally left.
Both Nathan and Pickles sighed in unison when it was finally quiet again except for the show. Nathan dragged Pickles through the episode. Then another. No interruptions. Pickles’s fried brain was getting antsy just sitting there. As soon as he saw Nathan start grabbing for the remote to put on yet another episode, he made a dive for it and hit the power button quicker than he should have been able to with his aging joints and withering bones.
“Hey, give that back,” Nathan frowned, reaching out for the remote again.
“Y’know, Nate, I was thinking we do something else for now.” The redhead leaned in. “It would be boring to just watch TV over our friender bender, wouldn’t it?”
Nathan knew that tone. Oh. Well, he supposes, this was another thing he could get behind. And it seems they are going to be alone for some time now, since he hasn’t heard the others in a while. “Fine,” he agreed, leaning in to kiss his boyfriend.
Pickles took this and ran with it, moving on top of Nathan and deepening the kiss. Nathan felt a pierced tongue touch his lips. He opened them, allowing their tongues to lick at each other. Pickles made a soft noise when Nathan grabbed onto his waist to keep them close together.
“OH GOD!! God! What the acschual FUCK is thisch in MY LIVING ROOM?!” Suddenly came a disgusted voice. Oh, poor, unfortunate Murderface.
Nathan and Pickles immediately jumped and pushed away from each other. “Dood,” Pickles whispered to Nathan, “This is why we gotta travel for these things.”
Nathan only frowned and nodded in agreement.