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Chapter Text

when shen qingqiu entered the brothel ,a place where he wasn't greeted with contempt and thinly veiled disgust , he felt his shoulder relax in relief

after his regression (?), he allowed himself more freedom to come here than his past life , the girls luckily don't remember anything from before , but they are still his jiejies who he owe so much and he openly consider like family

if in his last life , gi-ge was his only family , even with a false promise of return and refusal to explain , then in this one , he decided , it would be the sisters who warmly greet him and listen to him that would be his family

in a way , it sounded healthier

when they noticed him ,the girls greeted him with joy and warmth , quickly he found himself with 2 prostitute on either side taking him to his room in the far back of the building , he was walking confidently , as he had for 2 lifetime now , gone to the exact same room

however shen jiu had to pause after entering it

because , and excuse him ,but he didn't expect a CHILD to be there , in HIS sacred safe place , hello ?????

she was 12 of age , a young lady , who was frowning the moment her eyes found him-he was too- she wasn't anyone he had seen before

shen jiu couldn't help but fear if she was 'new' , if he had somehow caused it because for the love of god he didn't remember her from his past life- and if he did- if he-

"why is a man here ?" the kid spat "I thought you said they can't come here ?" she asked , and looked questioningly at hua-jie , the girl right next to him

the older woman smiled , something fond before rapidly moving next to the kid that very certainly bite , and with her hands on her shoulders she presented her to the curious rest

"this" she paused "is shen bao , or so I was told" pinching shen bao's cheeks she flashed an apologetic smile to his direction "someone payed me to take care of her for the day so I put her here where I knew was the safest , apologies ! apologies!" she laughed

he nodded to her explanation , turning his memory over for the mention of anything like this in his first life

he had missed the relief hua-jie subtly showed at the lack of questioning

he couldn't really remember , did hua-jie just never mention it ? or did he simply forget ?

he lied on his bed , his brain still turning over , with his eyes closed so he could relax a bit better ,he was suddenly reliving his last memories before returning back in time

his soul has been restless , the spiritual energy of xuan su's shard was no longer felt in his throat

he had died , he was sure of it , was it this then what is in between ? he didn't know at that time

he stayed like that for a long time , the feeling of wrong suffocating him , a hell he surely deserved

it was only when he started to slowly feel his body again that he realized what had happen in a mix of dread and exhaustion

that beast , that- that- that motherfucker- was trying to resurrect him !

he felt anger

why couldn't he be left alone , why was that monster still so obsessed with him ??? surely he had repaid everything already ???

so why ! why ??!!!??!

...

after the anger , he was left feeling hollow

his hearing recovered next , luo binghe would talk a lot

he heard about him discovering a nice shizun and about how he was going to "fix him" so he became like that

he heard about how he was planning to hide him from everyone -even his wives- so he could have him all by himself

he heard things ... that made him thanks whatever deity up there that he didn't have his sense of touch yet ....

and then , he heard silence

the silence took a long time to end , and he had at first assumed the little beast was out for some new artifact that would help revive him

yet it continued , until screams shook the palace , before it quieted down again

in that process , many theories turned up in his brain , luo binghe going mad and killing everyone , a war , some treason going in ?

he hoped to be destroyed in the process of whatever that was

until unfamiliar footsteps ,they were calm -yet the person “visibly” injured- they stopped right infront of him and shen jiu wondered if the man was going to use him like that beast and qiu jianluo did

a simple thought , one that despaired as quickly as it came yet not dismissed

"so” the man started “this is the infamous shen qingqiu ?" The man laughed voice rasp and tired , yet held some curiosity in it , that’s how the stranger sounded

Is shen jiu supposed to feel insulted ?

the lack of distain in saying his name however caught him slightly off guard

but the voice , obvious to this all crouched down with a hiss

"can you hear me ?" he asked "luo binghe has been trying to resurrect you ,I assume you already know”

Correct ,I guess ?

"that guy is such a pervert he is nearing seven hundreds wives , yet it's you they call a lecher ?" he asked before mumbling “more then in the books…” or something

Sounds weird

"also aren't the accusation against you too far fetched ?” the voice continued , not letting him process much “a fifteen years old slave massacred an entire household before going to wreck chaos with a demonic cultivator ?? if I was a blinded naive person I might have believed it" he continued , the tone turning strange at his last comment

well , is that you trying to defend me or call me a weakling ??? I am not that weak ????

"anyway I killed him"

Excuse me , who ?

"luo binghe I mean" he said like he heard him, but then again , fucking who ? "I don't think I have a lot of time left thought , let me free you , jiu-ge"

his world went silent and warm with a million question in his head , and almost missed the last sentence the man had said

"I hope we meet in the next and hopefully better life"

opening his eyes , he had the silly wonder if maybe she was related to him , he suddenly had the urge to just ask about that mysterious client that took her here , yet just as he parted his lips a loud knock resonated in the room , and hua-jie jumped to answer it

"baobao , look like your brother came to pick you up ! come here !"

shen bao , visibly brightening , joined and went out of the room

some girls cooed at how adorable she was , giggling between themselves , shen jiu only let out a small breath , and glanced down the balcony in his room where he could see the entrance of the brothel

he sat up a bit to have a better view , and between the drunk and horny customers , there was a young man that looked around twenty standing there , side-eying some men there with disgust

when he saw hua-jie and the kid , his posture straightened as shen bao run toward him , he exchanged a few words with both of them before going away , his low ponytail tied with a blue ribbon , the same found within the little girl

Chapter Text

“dumbfuck author ! dumbfuck novel !” 

These were shen yuan’s very embarrassing last words

Chocking to death was also shen yuan’s very embarrassing end

[ding ! ding !]

When he had opened his eyes again he found himself in a very dark place

He even wondered,  in a rare bout of smartness ‘is it dark , or the inexistence of light and space ?’

Well …not to be philosophical or anything , BUT HE COULDN’T EVEN FEEL THE GROUND HE WAS LAYING ON !!!!!!

Anyway , then a strange straight-out-of-a-sci-fi-movie hologram appeared calling itself system making him understand …. A few little things

Long story short , he was deadass like he had said at the start , BUT , because ladies and gentlemen , there is a but , like in literally everything in life thus fare , he was getting transmigrated !

YAY !

It’s just , he could of have preferred having more choices …

“so …. Lemme get this straight …. I am transmigrating into proud immortal demon way , and I ‘can’ chose between transmigrating into shen qingqiu or a random canon fodder ?”

[host is correct !]

“and if I am transmigrating into shen qingqiu I will have OOC function that I can’t break  ? but with the latter option I am completely free ?”

[ovo]

[what is host’s choice ?]

“make the canon fodder able to cultivate ”

[yes !]

…

Ok , so if you asked shen yuan , he didn’t think he would have regretted not choosing shen qingqiu back then

But he did

Anyway , let’s not think about it ! the system might have left him as fast as his er-ge’s girlfriend after he stopped sending her a lot of money (which is a week) but he is doing fine now ?? he even have a younger sister ! and a very good cultivation base !

huffing he finished cutting the beast he hunted , it fur was soft and warm which would be needed as the winter is coming soon , and a lot of it organs have healing proprieties , he could sell some of them , keep some , and put some in brother sanshi’s hands

He put it all in his qiankun bag for later and looked up in the sky , this might be close to 5 pm , he have left shen bao there for too long !

He rapidly flew to the village and speed walked his way to the warm red pavilion , stood there and asked a girl there about a-hua

she was about to tell him she had a client but he explained that he left something for her , the younger woman , suspicious , still went to get her

So he stood there , face passive , although he couldn’t help but briefly shot quick glares to the other patrons

He let out a sigh and continued to wait

however, he felt a pair of eyes on him , he could tell where  they came from , but didn’t dare meet the gaze , there was .... something about it

Not bad intent , so it was probably fine ? Haha , where did his survival instincts that he cultivated in this life go ?

He didn’t have the time to think about it when the sister he entrusted his meimei to came

Almost automatically , shen bao clung to his robes like she used to do when she was a toddler , with a smile on her lips

“did you have a successful hunt ?” a-hua asked “I heard that , a sister is expecting a child ,like , 2 villages over , she would need warm cloths”

He raised his eyebrows

“the same one that got married last year ?”

“you head about it ?”

He shrugged “we were invited , I will see with brother sanshi , although , I might end up delivering it myself , is it urgent ?”

“I don’t know , I think she is in her first 2 months , but the sooner the better ”

Shen yuan nodded , and took shen bao’s hands with his , and after saying goodbye , he threw a quick discreet glance to where he had been observed , doing it fast , and then he started walking calmly

But inside his head , it was anything but

‘OHMYFREACKINGGODHLAAU!!!!YNGDY?DEBDD!BGD!!?DNGZMNFDNHDGSJQ !!!!!!!!!! the creep stalking him was literally sooooo handsome , like , totally my type kind of handsome , like , definitely would let him step on m- HOLD’UP- no no , HE WAS NOT going to think about that one , definitely not , he barely accepted the fact he liked men a few years before , he wasn’t going to simp for a STRANGER who fUCKS women in a BROTHEL , hell nah’

Still his heart beat faster than it normally would , he had to take a deep breath

All of which shen bao didn’t fail to notice

Quickly he put an end to these thought and started relaxing

not really , he never can , not with shen bao , he can’t risk her , if he kill her like them , he-

he went to where that hack author is probably waiting , he still can’t believe that pathetic excuse of a man transmigrated with him , or was he the one who transmigrated with airplane ? pah ! who cares !

Well at least he isn’t alone

He hummed , smiling

“did bao-mei have fun ?” he asked

“en , that sister took me to a room with pretty decoration , she let me do her hair and she put make up on me”

“really ? is that why bao-mei look pretty ?”

“what do you mean ? I am always pretty ????? also , I washed it away , but I can ask her next time so you could see it”

sneaky , this was her way of getting him to take her there again

“did you like it that much ?” he asked , genuinely curious , his sister never liked it when she had to wait for him in an inn or brothel , or anywhere that wasn’t an ding peak really

“not at first , but there was this pretty gege who entered, this meimei believe she saw fate , he is my future brother in law ! I just know it” she winked at him

“brother in law ? like in marry a-hua ? I don’t thi-”

“ugh! no !” she yelled , looking the part of a disappointed sibling “forget it ! why am I even trying ? let’s just go to hua gege”

Saying this she started pulling him with all the strength her short ass body could muster , which is much more than you would think mind you

He sighed , planning this month’s work and what he would have to do in his head , he let himself be dragged by his meimei

That had been their first meeting in this life, and the second wasn’t even that faraway , because not even a day later , shen qingqiu saw the little girl again

you see , shen jiu had thought a lot about the person that ‘set him free’ by granting him death

He thought about him very frequently , it was normal , after all , that man killed the little beast , he was also the only one who gave him real freedom , as twisted as it might sound, even if he had shortly lost his own life , he would be a valuable ally and a dangerous enemy , and as the strategist of cang qion sect , he would obviously think about him

But he only knew the sound of his voice and not how he looked like , he can't make sure unless he ask liu qingge

....

He shuddered , the fact that that brute had watched everything as a ghost wasn’t something he was planning on unpacking , but his thought couldn’t help but wander to the man he saw in front of the brothel

He had asked hua-jie about him , and he was surprised when he detected a flinch , she might have thought she lied to him well , but please , he knew her for 2 lifetimes now , he isn’t that blind

His memories strayed to before his trial , when he visited the brothel for the last time , with all his gold and valuables , to give his sisters

He remember her taking him to a room , he remember her begging him to let her help , oh jiu’er , I know a way to help , please trust me , forget that damned sect , I will make sure you will be alright , I know some people-

But he couldn’t back then, because qi-ge would be in trouble , but now that he decided to wash his hands off him he couldn’t , but he can pretend he can see how pathetic that was

Anyway….

Walking through the rainbow bridge he passed by an ding , he didn’t plan to go in there at all , yet he flattered when he saw shang qinghua talking with a kid wearing blue robes that weren’t uniforms

A kid who looked so much like a certain guest in the warm red pavilion ….

The girl turned slightly around revealing her face , and shen qingqiu cursed out loud

That was shen bao

Chapter Text

Approaching in even steps , shen jiu walked toward the obvious duo

Shang qinghua was the first to notice him , and he squealed so loud and in such a way that had shen jiu pause and search for which maiden yelled and if she was in danger

“dude , you scream like a girl”

Ah , so it was him …

“SHUT UP ????!!!!???” shang qinghua yelled , face red

Ignoring the pitiful and downright embarrassing sight of that rat , shen jiu turned to shen bao , a 12 years old sounded like a much better discussion partner than him

“what are you doing here ? aren’t you supposed to be with your brother ?” he asked , ignoring the bewildered look shang qinghua gave him at that statement

“he left me to take care of something” she replied dryly , more by habit then an actual answer , it’s proven by the late recognition that flash in her eyes , she gasp , “it’s the pretty gege !”

His fan open quickly hiding the lower half of his face, pretty ? gege ????? THE . FUCK .

Still shang qinghua seems to get paler

“x-xiao bao , you can’t call shen-shixiong ‘gege’ !”

The girl huffed

“everyone is a gege or jiejie ! what else am I supposed to call him ?”

“ah ….” Shang qinghua seemed to die a little bit inside “gongzi w-would do ….” He ended up saying , wiping a fat huge tear from his eyes

Pathetic

“shen bao could continue to call this one ‘ge’ ,this master does not mind” he said partially out of spite , and partially for the smile that graced the little kid’s face , he always had a soft spot for girls , even when he no longer felt as safe with them as in his past life , courtesy to the beast’s wives

“I knew it ! Meeting with you really is fate !” she whisper yelled with her self , in the same childish excitement she had with the warm red pavilion’s prostitute

He wanted to tell her it wasn’t , because in his last life , he never even saw her face , but then he remembered the last words his ears picked up before everything went dark

“I hope we meet in the next and hopefully better life”

It had been a weird phrasing, but after thinking about it so much , it seemed obvious the ‘better life’ wasn’t just for him , but for that person too , that man

From the moment he woke in to the qiu’s and came back to qing jing to be able to support his jiejie’s he turned that sentence again and again in his head

A better life ? was that man serious ? for a scum like him ? but then … if he believed it then …surely he could … try ?

And he did , he no longer had as much resentment as before , his cultivation is safe and better than even the sect leader himself , it made him both bitter and smug

He won over many heart demons thanks to a simple sentence , thanks to a man of all things , so as he previously said , he thought about him a lot , and one of his theories was perhaps , he had a lover or a sister that was forced into that tyrant’s harem ?

So , if her brother was him , then …

“Maybe it is” he said instead “tell me , does your brother leave you alone frequently ?”

“it depends” she said , all too cheerful

“what is he called ?” he asked

shen bao smiled widely at him , eyes radiating innocence , and refusing to grace his question with an answer

“shen-shixiong , do you need something ?” shang qinghua rudely interrupted “her brother asked me to make her practice calligraphy ! haha , not like there is much to practise- ,and he would come back soon so …. Shen-shixiong ??!!??”  whatever spine shang qinghua had made quickly withered under the glare he received from shen qingqiu and he let out another unflatteringly feminine scream “you do you ! do whatever you want ! oh what is that ? my head disciple is calling !!!!! BYE BYE !” and quickly , it’s almost as if he wasn’t even there

Shen Jiu tightened his hold on the fan , it stung , being blatantly rejected like that , although he wasn’t stupid , he knew that shen bao was avoiding questions about her brother and shang qinghua only tried to help ,but it still fucking hurt

He took in a deep breath and looked at shen bao , to be honest , he is just probably wrong , what are the chances of her brother being the same person from back then ? since they don’t want him here , he will just-

“pretty gege , my ge is coming soon , do you want to wait for him ?” she said , and went on to fearlessly grab his robes “you need to , I want you to meet him , you are so nice”

He didn’t know how to respond to that one

“you shouldn’t trust men so easily” he warned instead

“I shouldn’t trust anyone” she replied , “but jiejie trust you , and if gege do too , then all the better”

“men are scum” he tries again , he realized that that ‘jiejie’ must be referring to hua-jie , he wondered what their relationship was

“en , I know , ge say the same thing”

“…”

“would you wait for him with me , preeeetty pleaaaase ?” she whine

He gives in “alright”

And the kid , smile , so carefree , not a lot of people do that in front of him nowadays , he wonder how long that would last

They were in shang qinghua’s room practicing calligraphy , shen bao’s level was actually amazing from someone who supposedly do little practice , and she had been mature enough to converse in an intelligent conversation with him yet still dodge every question about her brother like it’s the plague , however shen jiu did notice that most of the answer she gave had no hesitation in them , as if she had done it hundreds of times before , it made him curious about his probably-not-‘benefactor’

It took 2 hours for someone to knock on the door , shen bao instantly perked up , recognizing the person from knocks alone

The man who entered the place like it was his own room , was as tall as shen qingqiu , thought larger ,his eyes of a soft green and his hair in the same lazy ponytail as the other day , when their eyes locked , he seemed to recognize him

they stared at each other for some time , perhaps more than how should be proper , shen jiu’s own heart beat fast , hurting his rib cage and taking away his breath

“Excuse this lowly one , you must be peak lord shen ? it’s an honor to meet you” the man asked , in a warm quiet voice that sound so kind and-

It was it …. That was his voice

This man , this man killed luo binghe , this man gave him the relief of sweet death , and wished to meet him a scum in this life

This man , who seemed not to recognize him from anywhere other than the fateful encounter in the brothel , because shen bao was right

It really was fate

“yes , this one is shen qingqiu” he said , voice calm not betraying his excitement at meeting this person that unknowingly gave him hope in his darkest time , whose last word to him made him get up and run away from the qiu mansion , made him cultivate and encouraged him to beat his heart demons , he never realized how much he wanted to meet him until now

But he felt fear , he feared this person would leave , be disgusted by him like almost everyone else , still he stood up to greet him head held high

Face betraying nothing

the other shen , checked briefly how his sister was doing , a small soft smile graced his features , before turning to look at him

shen jiu expected it to disappear , to be replaced by a scowl , similar to the one his sister gave him when they first meet maybe ? or more like the one his shidis and shimeis gave ? even if his reputation wasn’t as bad as before thanks to liu qingge knowing the truth and blocking most of it from spreading , the rumors existed , and his benefactor surely knew of it

shen jiu didn’t expect the smile to grow wider

“thank you for looking after my sister , this one hope she wasn’t too much of a bother , this one's name is shen yuan”

Shen jiu’s breath hitched , he didn’t expect , his benefactor –shen yuan- to be … kind to him

Was he like that with everyone ?

Even if he was … surely it’s alright to hope they could get to know each other ? he was the one who said he wanted to meet in this life ! he should take responsibility !

Shen jiu opened his mouth to say something but closed it again , he didn’t know what to say , he imagined this so much , with so many different scenarios , yet when it came down to it , he was unable to do anything

Luckily, shen yuan didn’t seem to mind , he hurriedly said

“if it is alright with you , this shen yuan will make tea , begging peak lord shen to wait”

He opened his fan

“Do whatever you want”

Ah … his face was growing a bit warm ….

Shen bao wanted to know , why was she feed so much dogfood ? what had she done ??? hah ???

She shipped it at first sight , literally , but this was a normal first meeting , why did it seem like so much was into it ? what was she missing ???

Letting out a sigh she glanced at her calligraphy , it was amazing in her personal –not humble- opinion , she was amazing so surely she would figure this mystery out ????

She coughed and tried to make her expression stoic , like her ge and new pretty gege , she probably failed at it but- it. does. not. matter.

“pretty gege ” she called out “should I call you qiu-gege ?” she asked

The older man who seemed to be lost in some thought became stiff

“no” he said coldly and sharply , it almost made her flinch, and shen bao had the feeling she had triggered a bad memory , like when she asked her brother who their parent are , however he seemed to pull himself out of it , before he awkwardly added “this one’s name is shen jiu , shen qingqiu is a courtesy name”

She nodded , a tad bit unsure , then tried “jiu-gege ?”

That got her a smile –if the twitch of his lips could be called that- so she counted it as a good save

Soon , her brother came back with tea that he poured to all three of them as he sat next to her and took her calligraphy practice paper looking over them seriously

She saw jiu-gege looking at him intensely with pinkish ears , and damn it , she doesn’t know if this real or if she read too much danmei , but

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUck

Her brother went through the small stack of paper , before putting them down , patting her head and praising her work with a smile

She smiled too , but could FEEL the way jiu-gege stared at their interaction , and suddenly she wanted OUT , damn it ! she was not going to eat the dog food she can smell getting cooked over here !!!!

“ge , ge , can I go to hua-gege?” she asked , edging desperation

The moment the permission was given , she fucked out

Ah hell nah ,  ge , you are on your own

Chapter Text

Shen yuan jumped off his sword on an ding peak’s training ground , as empty as always , not like any of the disciples had time for cultivation , a pity

walking toward airplane’s house , he got close and sensed an unfamiliar qi signature next to shen bao’s , making him frown

knocking ,he opened the door without waiting for a response , he didn't need one anyway

he stopped to take in the ‘stranger’ sitting in front of the table , his back facing him , slowly , the stranger turned his head to look at him with phoenix piercing green eyes , silky brown hair falling from his shoulders to his back when he turned around , dressed in green expensive robes befitting a peak lord , radiating a cold beauty and elegance as well as an air of power and authority

Hold’up…

Wasn’t that the handsome client that was stalking-but-not-really him at the entrance of the warm red pavilion ?!??

Why is he here ????? who the-

Oh

“Excuse this lowly one , you must be peak lord shen ? it’s an honor to meet you” he said he wonder if it shows that he isn’t used to talking formally

The (supposed) shen qingqiu had a crack on his aloof mask for barely a second , with some emotion he couldn’t discerned , was it a reaction to his voice ?

…

Was it that bad ????? oh no ! my poor scum villain’s musician ears !!! they must be sensitive !!!!! forgive this lowly peasant he really didn’t know!!!!

“yes , this one is shen qingqiu” the scum villain said , and shen yuan stopped himself from nervously smiling at such a cold voice , that was scary ? did he like … do something wrong ???

briefly glancing upon shen bao , taking in her bored expression that is definitely not listening to anything they are saying , still trying to act like big brother eh ?

The through made him smile a little

When he looked back to shen qingqiu , the man was frowning , eyes narrow , shen yuan had a mental picture of a cat for one millisecond curtousy to a joke airplane has cracked to him once , and god- he was right

His smile grew larger

Shen qingqiu looked taken aback

“thank you for looking after my sister , this one hope she wasn’t too much of a bother , this one's name is shen yuan” he said sincerely , she could be a pain in the ass sometimes

And when shen qingqiu opened his mouth to well … probably insult him he guess, he closed it again

Eh ? was he so pitiful that even THE silver tonged qing jing peak lord pitied him ?????

Trying to save whatever face he had left , shen yuan hurriedly added

“if it is alright with you , this shen yuan will make tea , begging peak lord shen to wait”

Shen qingqiu opened his fan

“Do whatever you want”

He went to the kitchen , and started preparing tea , over hearing shen bao and shen qingqiu -more as- shen jiu-‘s discussion

hearing the way he reacted to the nickname ‘qiu-gege’ made shen yuan think about a discussion he had with airplane years ago , a few months after meeting

Shen yuan put a 6 years old shen bao in a bed

He passed her his qi , both to make her sleep deeper and help with her ‘health’ and ‘interesting’ constitution

“you said , last time that shen qingqiu and liu qingge regressed didn’t you ?”

“ah yes ? I did ? you know how scared I was when liu shidi broke into my room and asked me about demons and whatnot ???”

And here we go again … that hack author started rambling and although slightly annoyed , shen yuan didn’t say anything

Some of his younger sibling used to be like that , shen yuan physically flinched from the thought , it still hurt

He coughed

“I more like meant to talk about shen qingqiu’s change … do you think he would abuse children again ?”

“I don’t know ??? like luo binghe is still a kid and we only recently became peak lords , how would I know ???”

Shen yuan was silent again , then asked another question he has been itching to know , long before he even meet this hack

“on a scale from 1 to 10 , where 10 is absolutely horrible , where would shen qingqiu’s life be pre-trial ? with luo binghe’s at 8 without the abyss arc”

Shang qinghua paused

“we can’t compare trauma”

“I know”

“but like …. 15 ?”

“…”

“do you want me to tell you about it ?”

“no.”

Shaking the memory away , shen yuan entered then , mechanically poured the tea and sat next to his meimei taking her calligraphy practice sheets

Ah , it’s been a long time since he last made her do it

He went thought them absentmindly , meh , it looks good , probably , he doesn’t really have proper standards to compare it too , but since every other text he stumbled upon have shitty handwriting and he see this as good , then it must be amazing

Ugh , that orphanage fucked him up in more way than one

He huffed and patted shen bao’s head , who was awkward , did she think he didn’t like it ? lies ! he likes everything she does !

“you did well” he said , and he saw her fidget

“ge , ge , can I go to hua-gege?” she asked her tone was slightly desperate

Of course he said yes and she immediately went out

Did …. Did she miss that hack author that much ??? IMPOSSIBLE !

He let out a small scoff at the absurdity of the thought and smiled in shen jiu’s direction

They sat there in silence, and shen yuan could feel the peak lord’s numerous questions , he faked a cough

“is there anything you wanted to tell me ?”

Shen jiu , looked taken aback , again , before snapping his fan opened

“is shen bao your sister ?” was the first question

“yeah” he replied , was it not obvious ?

“you two look nothing a like”

Ah that ….

Well it’s true , while shen yuan have a boring shade of brown hair and light green eyes , shen bao’s hair is darker and her eyes are brown

His nose is sharper , her mouth is thinner

His hair is straighter than he would ever be , her hair has curls by it end

Ok , they don’t really look related but

“do you need blood relations to be family ? she is my sister that I raised and named , nothing she or anyone would do can ever change that” period

“of course you wouldn’t …” shen jiu muttered under his breath his eyes going softer, shen yuan was obvious to it

Shen jiu sighed, of course he wouldn’t be like yue qingyuan , such a silly worry

Then he thought about the hundreds of questions from before and after these events , since he couldn’t decide he asked the most recent one , or maybe one that is to make sure his previous thoughts were indeed correct

“then why do you always leave her behind ?”

And shen jiu watched shen yuan visibly freeze and pale, he knew then that he had said something that he shouldn’t have said , brought an old wound back that didn’t even heal properly

“no , no I don’t , I just have work” shen yuan said dryly

The rogue cultivator had a difficult to read expression , one thing was sure , it wasn’t positive

Shen jiu held his cup tighter hoping the slight shaking of his hands isn’t noticeable

‘amazing shen qingqiu , you messed it up on the first meeting , truly ! and one would think that the qing jing peak lord would be good with words ! of course you had to be a jerk to him somehow !’

But instead of a reaction (shen jiu didn’t know what to expect from his savior) , his face smoothened out with practiced ease and he smiled

“ah , maybe I haven’t passed enough time with her as of late ? you see , it’s hard to do that lately , and I thought she … but maybe 12 isn’t old enough , oh but don’t worry , I do take long breaks once in a while to spend most of it with her ”

“right…” shen jiu , didn’t know what to add , he didn’t mean to say the man has been neglecting her , but he realize the way he phrased it wasn’t the best

Still , he didn’t seem to mind so maybe he didn’t completely mess it up ?

“can this master ask another question ?”

Shen yuan held back from saying ‘you just did’ and instead nodded

Shen jiu fanned himself , clearly –not really but shen yuan can somehow pick on it- hesitating , he hid his face behind that fan

“where would be staying this night ?”

“Ah ?”

The question was sudden and spoked slightly faster then the others , shen yuan was confused , but replied anyway

“in an ding’s hallmaster quarter, I have a room there”

The fanning stopped

“wouldn’t that be inconvenient ?”

“n-not really ?”

“would xi- your sister be with you ?”

“no ?”

“is it very comfortable ?”

“cheap”

“?”

“like everything in an ding”

“so ?”

“yeah it sucks” shen yuan said , having zero idea where this was going

“so come sleep at my house”

.

..

…

“excuse me ?”

And something must have shown on his face , maybe his embarrassment or chock ? or both ??? with a hint of his gayness ????? because shen jiu visibly flattered , but held his ground

“I have a side room where you would be comfortable , if you are worried about your sister then she can come with you , I have a disciple around her age who just love socializing , she will feel at ease , I already told someone to clean it up long before you came , so …”

These very nice argument … were actually thought of for a long time weren’t they ????????

Shen yuan sweated

Did … did shen fucking qingqiu suspect him for something ? he swears ! other then his shabby background and transmigration and not shabby but might look that way ‘partnerships’ he did nothing !!!

Ugh , it’s airplane’s fault !!!! it must be somehow !

“well” he sighed , trying to look regretful and politely decline “I don’t think-”

But shen jiu’s shoulder’s dropped , his fan lowered, and his eyes shining , and he was , OH MY GOD ????? he is POUTING !!!!!!!!

“you won’t come ?”

No why did he sound genuinely upset ????? like he want him to hang out with him or something ????

In the end , shen yuan was unable to refuse and shen jiu internally beamed

‘let’s hope I am not murdered in my sleep … not that he could do it , but still …’ silently mourned shen yuan

‘let’s hope fate stay kind and let me spend more time with him’ silently hoped shen jiu

Chapter Text

His body felt sore , the burning feeling of untended injuries registering a second later

This wasn’t why he panicked

Why ? did that person fail ? did he lie ? was it a dream ? is luo binghe alive or did someone else resurrect him again ? who the hell would-

He opened his eyes with difficulty and was greeted with a wooden ceiling

He stared

He took his time to understand , it wasn’t unheard of , but time travel was mostly seen as a myth , used as a curse or a second chance by some god, shen jiu couldn’t be blamed for not thinking about it first

When he did , he couldn’t help the bitterness that took over him

Did even the god wish to curse him ? making him repeat a life full of suffering ?

He painfully closed his eyes , chocking on a pathetic sob , until a voice replayed in his head

“let’s meet in the next and hopefully better life”

He got up his thought running , then, maybe , just maybe , if he is able to change something this time-

He went to do his work , like a shadow , fast and efficient , he waited and surely enough , qiu jianluo called him to his office to very likely beat him up

He walked slow yet fast enough not to get punished for it , and dreaded each step

He still didn’t have a proper timeline, was this before or after qiu jianluo realized he had a pretty face ? he hoped for the former but readied himself for the latter

Still , no one really wanted to get assaulted did they ? so he understandably paused in front of the door before forcing himself to enter

When he did , the door closed violently and qiu jianluo … did what he did

Shen jiu could only feel relief that what he hoped for was correct , letting that bastard monologue while kicking him , something about him acting different and weirdly submissive , he could see it got qiu jianluo’s guard slightly up , hidden by his arrogant declaration for ‘breaking him’ , but even he … no , especially him must know that breaking someone doesn’t just happen , he surely wasn’t the first slave under him , so the beating just got more brutal

Shen jiu didn’t hear much of it, a skill he developed in the water prison , if he fill his head with something then he can easily disconnect

And in his ears , one sentence rang again and again , filling him with confusion , wariness and a tiny bit of hope

“let’s meet in the next and hopefully better life”

When he was thrown in that shed , he thought a lot , about the possibilities of the future , and then he told himself

He shall live , if only to repay a few debts

And the plan was made

A simple crude one , hastily thought of but worked either way

Cultivate in secret in the qiu’s , ran away , and after that, is future shen jiu’s problem

While going on with it , he sometimes entertained the thought of that man also being here , with all his memories , trying to save him

When he realized what he was thinking about , he almost punched himself

What is this ? little nine ,he thought hysterically , were you always so desperate that the first person to not outright hate you would deserve such a devotion ???!!?! pathetic ! a scum like you ! you-you don’t deserve to even feel this way!

…

But he did

because once a starving rat, is shown the slight kindness , either in the offer of a coin or the passing of a tanghulu stick , they would come back to you , like a stray cat , hoping for more , and shen jiu ….

Shen jiu was no different

When he finally ran away after poisoning qiu jianluo with a slow acting hard to notice poison (because if left alive , qiu jianluo might succeed in taking him out of his position in the sect if he ever goes to it , and he also hated him still) shen jiu ran

He went 2 villages away with nothing but his freshly established cultivation and stubbornness

Whenever he felt a qi deviation near he controlled his breathing, calmed his mind, and imagined that warm tired and curious voice

“let’s meet in the next and hopefully better life”

at some point he felt like it would be peak disrespect to that man if his live wasn’t better , so he returned to cang qiong sect

he heard of a yue qingyuan who just began a year long mission and meet a liu qingge who know too much for his own good

Still , he can’t completely hate it

“uh, he had a huge wound in his abdomen ,a lot of blood, I wasn’t clear sighed alright ? my soul was barely there ! wait? Why are you looking at me like that!”

No scratch that, he knew nothing that shen jiu wanted to know , can’t even give a description ! stupid idiotic brute !

He was so disappointed, he went to his jiejie’s that night to be coddled

They were sleeping while he had been staring at the ceiling still , he bit his lips

Would he fail to meet him? how could he even know who he is when he only know the sound of his voice ? not his appearance ! nor his name ! would he forget the sound of his whispers too ?

….

When that thought passed his head , shen jiu went on a mission to retrieve a memory recording voice only artifact (yes that’s the freacking name) and recorded that memory , using it not only strengthened it in his head but also left it recorded forever

“his hair was brown I think” that brute added once

“you think ?”

Liu qingge turned his head away from his shen-shixiong ‘s judging gaze , why was shen qingqiu acting so strange ????

“around your height , when you were peak lord I mean”

It picked shen jiu’s interest

“you think ?” he said sarcastically

“I think .”

Shen jiu scoffed , but there was a new light to his eyes , a small excitement , liu qingge huffed

Laying in his bed , in his bamboo house , at night with the knowledge that his benefactor is a wall away is making shen jiu unable to concentrate on his paper work much less sleep

He sigh, maybe he should check on his esteemed guest

Right …. Esteemed ….

He kept throwing glances at the door , as if waiting for a knock or a certain someone to open it , when it didn’t happen , shen jiu sighed and finally decided , he was going to him himself !

making a quick grab of a much needed fan and opening his door , he stopped at the door of a room that probably should have been used as a head disciple carter but meh

These brats aren’t as important as his shen yuan

Still , he found it odd that he doesn’t feel any qi, he didn’t feel one in an ding , and only slightly picked up on it on the way to qing jing , but it felt weird

he braced himself armed with nothing but his fan and opened the door

“shen yuan ?”

Ah …. He really wasn’t here …

Shen yuan was sitting on the woodshed’s roof , he had wanted to make sure the protagonist , luo binghe wasn’t sleeping here , a silly worry , since of course shen qingqiu wouldn’t be a fan of becoming a human stick again , or maybe the dude just killed him off

And who is shen yuan to blame him ?

He sat there, his legs dangling in air, humming a random song whose lyrics is at the tip of tongue yet has been forgotten by time , as he watched the moon , only the right half was shining , the other half was in the dark , unseen

He can feel someone coming around the area and realize maybe scum villain bro is searching for him so , embarrassed ,he let his ‘qi’ out for the peak lord to sense and maybe come here

Well , if it can be called qi , truly he doesn’t really know what it is , but it’s supposed to be qi ? or something

anyway …

shen qingqiu took no time to arrive , brows furrowed , his steps quiet

he quietly greeted him by a hum , and slowly shen yuan looked down to see him

“hello” he said with a playful tone

He saw shen jiu relax, and he wondered if he was worried that he ran away …. Aiya !!!!! he wouldn’t do it !!!

Maybe

I mean it depend ….

“what is shen yuan doing here ?”

Shen yuan grinned

“I couldn’t sleep” he said , and it was the truth , he had to make sure the white lotus protagonist wasn’t shivering here ! it’s hard to sleep in a new environment when he already don’t feel safe in his own skin

Shen jiu stared at him a few second too long

“is it uncomfortable ?” the qing jing peak lord asked , a stupid question !!!!

“what ?” shen yuan almost fell from the roof of the shed at the absurdity “you serious ? Have you seen that room! you would think you made it for your significant other not for a random guests !”

Shen jiu snapped his fan open

“you liked it ?” he asked , in an almost shy voice , but surely shen yuan was imagining it ! but damn , since when was his imagination made up adorable things ? “I am glad” he added , quitter , not meeting his eyes

And under the moon , the cultivator below looked eternal , all the part of a refined immortal fairy , rosy cheeks from the cold ,and a hint of a smile and damn ….

Shen yuan feel in love from the roof , for real this time

That …. That was embarrassing … however the impact shen yuan expected never came , looking up , he meet shen qingqiu’s eyes

His face a few centimeters from his face , shen jiu grabbing his arm , he quickly let it go like it burned him , perhaps it did , because his face was red

Shen yuan almost actually fell a second (third ?) time , but only stumbled from the sight and push

Wow

That was embarrassing , hahaha , at least he didn’t fall on the guy ! now that would be DISASTROUS , thankfully , shen jiu only caught his arm ! not his waist ! and definitely not his ass that he doesn’t want to be grabbed by the dude who , like shen yuan thought a few days before , would look hot from below , stepping on hi-

….

He has a problem, a mental one , and a gay one

he will ignore it right now.

Smiling to hide his own embarrassment , he passed his fingers through his hair and looked over to the ever silent shen jiu , and wondering if he spooked him , or maybe hurt him in anyway

He found him , looking at his hands with , a cute disbelieving expression on his face , he was squishing air

And shen yuan is confused

Shen jiu was looking at them like they held the world’s biggest mystery , and in a way , for shen jiu they just did

His entire body was red at this point , and shen yuan was …. Slightly worried

he came next to him , put a hand on shen jiu’s shoulder , startling the latter slightly , but he didn’t get away , so shen yuan , against his better judgement left it there , sliding it on his back

“are you alright ?” shen yuan asked with concern

A complicated expression was on the peak lord’s face , his eyes seemed to search shen yuan’s face for something , before averting their gaze

“I am sorry” shen qingqiu apologized

And it was shen yuan’s turn to be taken aback , excuse me ?

“why are you sorry ?? I am the one who should apologies ! I lost my balance and felt , you caught me ! why are you apologizing ?”

Shen jiu quickly looked at his hand

“no , I” shen qingqiu fucking stuttered “I shouldn’t have grabbed you like that”

“you didn’t hurt me , but I could of have been if you didn’t it” shen yuan said with a confident smile , although , no , he wouldn’t have been hurt at the slightest , but shen jiu didn’t need to know that !

Nodding to himself he brushed a hair stand that was covering shen jiu’s face and his breath hitched , he didn’t realize his hand stayed there for more than what would have been appropriate

He thought once again , that this man before him , really was just too beautiful

When shen jiu found his a-yuan , he felt relief , as uncomfortable as he had been to follow that qi , he recognized it as shen yuan’s and like a fool , ran

And like a liar , didn’t look like it

Shen yuan was sitting on that shed looking at the moon , and shen jiu felt nervous , it’s not like shen yuan would find any evidence of the …. Abuse he put the little beast through here , not when luo binghe was sleeping at the dorms , with a very good friendship with ming fan , no he wouldn’t

He internally panicked still

Because what he had done was dirty and horrible and he was a monster for it , it took him 3 entire psychology books to admit that because he didn’t want to see the abuse he inflicted as what it was , an imitation of that bastard-

And upon it all , he didn’t want shen yuan to know , thanking whatever god up there for whatever misunderstanding shen yuan had in their past life to free him , he must have thought the accusation were false or something , and he can’t , never , let him know of the hateful man he used be

He gulped , wanting to call him , but his name wouldn’t gout of his unworthy mouth so he stayed there , stupidly

Soon , shen yuan looked down at his wretched existence , all high up , like he deserved to be , the moon showing off his beauty

“hello” he was greeted , playfully

Right … shen yuan would never know about it , and shen jiu can continue to stay next to him , admire him and repay his debt

“what is shen yuan doing here” he tilted his head , and paused , was he too dry ? should he have said hello back ? oh shit-

But shen yuan grinned , like it didn’t matter

And shen jiu relaxed

“I couldn’t sleep”

Until he tensed again

Now there could be a lot of reasons for that , and it also could only be an excuse , but

But for shen jiu who spent years perfecting the room , who would clean it himself every week and make sure it was pretty and stayed that way

He felt a nudge of insecurity

“was it uncomfortable ?” he found himself asking

Shen yuan whoever was visibly startled “what ? you serious ? Have you seen that room! you would think you made it for your significant other not for a random guests !”

That- that- that- WNYZEGXUEZ?AOGAGFX?FHFRFHNRCX?XPNUOH?EIYGIPGFIHONQBFGN

He snapped his fan open

No , he isn’t as pretentious as to say it was for his significant other , shen jiu doesn’t like shen yuan , not in that way , true he might of have thought about marring him before , but these were silly teenage hormones speaking back then ! and that dream and- and-

….

His grip on his fan tightened

He never thought about his feelings that way before

Still

“you liked it ?” he wondered out loud , a smile gracing his features and he sincerely added “I am glad” and suddenly he didn’t find himself able to meet shen yuan’s eyes

Technically that was the wrong thing to do , since with a muffed yelp , shen yuan felt and shen jiu ,was too far to properly catch him

He only caught his arm , somehow , and shen yuan when turning to look at him , with his eyes wide and his breath blowing on shen jiu’s face

Shen jiu abruptly pushed himself away , trembling like a bullied maiden , and no , shen jiu wasn’t the one who did this comparison , like , imagine that !

It was this author , because simply put , look at how red he became . with his green robes he look like Christmas decoration

I think

I never celebrated Christmas to know , anyway-

Back at shen jiu’s staring

And his hand who was squishing air

One very scholarly thought passed through shen jiu’s mind

Shen yuan’s biceps!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IT ! DID! NOT! HELP! SHEN JIU’S! RED ! FACE !

Shen jiu then , like the (twice over) adult that he is , took a deep breath to compose himself , hearing shen yuan’s steps and feeling the hand that rested on his shoulders , shen jiu tensed unconsciously before relaxing in his savior’s hold ,who went down to his back …. And stopped there , shen jiu felt relief that it didn’t go lower

he had no idea how to cope if this man ended up acting like … men

He ignored the disappointment , because ! ridiculous !!!

He turned to look at shen yuan who asked him if he was alright

What was he ?! the one who felt ??????

“I am sorry” shen jiu said

“why are you sorry ?? I am the one who should apologies ! I lost my balance like an idiot and felt , you caught me ! why are you apologizing ?”

Shen jiu glanced at his sinful hand that dared to-

“no ,I- I shouldn’t have grabbed you just like that”

“you helped me , no need to be sorry for that”

‘no’ shen jiu wanted to yell ‘what help ? if I hadn’t been here in the first place you wouldn’t have felt ! if it weren’t for you I would still be in that palace awaiting my revival or my death , I wouldn’t be here , content and safer for the first time’

He could only sigh , this wasn’t how he imagined it to go

Still

When shen yuan brushed a stand of hair obscuring shen jiu’s face , with a soft smile lighted by the moon , shen jiu thought , this couldn’t have been better

Chapter Text

“I want to understand , why are you surprised ? what exactly in my reaction is unexpected ? surely you didn’t think I will run into your ‘loving’ arms hug you and cry because you happen to be my mother by blood ? tell me , where was this motherly love before huh ?”

“I-”

“alright , let me put it bluntly then , because it seem you cannot take a hint, I hate you , I don’t like you , I hope to neither see you nor hear about you ever , you wouldn’t stop me now would you ? mother ?”

“…”

“I am going”

“it’s …. It’s dangerous out there”

“because I am safe here ?”

“no- yes- I mean , that baby … that child would be the death of you ! you can’t escape with her ! please stay-”

a distance away from the bamboo house , three head were hidden behind the bamboos and mist

“this is stupid” said ming fan “we shouldn’t spy on our shizun”

“yet here you are” scoffed ning yingying

Luo binghe kept quiet , he actually didn’t know why they were doing here ….

They kept on watching until the door opened and their shizun walked out of it , but instead of going wherever he would go , he knocked on the room next to him

“oh my god !” exclaimed yingying “it must be true ! shizun brought a guest with him !!”

“a guest ?” questioned luo binghe , if you asked him , shizun never seemed to like having someone in the bamboo house for longer then necessary , hell even the side room , no one but a few lucky (or unlucky seeing their punishment) got a glimpse of it

he meet shizun’s eyes, glaring at him

“scram” they heard him say , and none dared to do otherwise

Shen qingqiu huffed and almost knocked again but when he turned around he was face to face with shen yuan , their chest close , almost touching ,none of them moved

“were those your disciples ?”

Shen jiu nodded , his ears reddening by the unexpected proximity

“they look shen bao’s age , how adorable”

No , shen jiu could have said , but didn’t dare , he just shrugged

“ah …”shen yuan responded as if he heard his thought before faking a cough “thank you for letting me stay here , it was better than the room in an ding”

Shen jiu nodded again , inside he was vibrating with happiness at the compliment

“are you going to go to shen bao now ?”

“now ? at this time ?” shen yuan let out a breathy laugh making his heart flutter “she sleeps a lot , that girl , an earthquake wouldn’t wake her up !”

Shen jiu tightened his hold on his fan , so … shen yuan was free ?

“then perhaps-” but before he could finish what he needed to say a huge scream resonated on the silent qing jing peak

“SHIZUNNNNNNN”

These unfilially disciples !he will throw them in the abyss one by one !

Gritting his teeth he went to where the scream were followed closely by shen yuan , he didn’t even need to be there to know what happened , if the smoke is anything to go by

“not again !” he muttered , please don’t tell him they bombed the music hall , please

In the end , it wasn’t the music hall , but the kitchen , which made more sense , but when did his disciples have it ?! it’s fishy …

before he could do anything about it , the fire lowered as if slammed into the ground with a flick of shen yuan’s qi

shen jiu almost gaped , almost

“what a delightful way to meet your students ! are they always like this ?” he asked grinning at him and shen jiu suddenly loved every single one of his brats

He didn’t know what to reply , luckily he didn’t have to because ning yingying excitedly greeted shen yuan , soon followed by the others asking questions for both knowledge and gossip’s sake

Then it looked to be luo binghe’s turn as he looked at shen yuan –his ‘murder’ in an other life- with sparkles in his eyes

“is master shen going to stay here more ?”

Well , THAT drew everyone’s attention even more as plea of ‘please do !!!!!’ resonated on the peak

shen qingqiu was one breath away from joining them

“maybe , if your shizun accept me of course” Uh … shen yuan ???? what is with this wording ???!!!!?! my heart !

Every disciple turned to him , puppy eyed , and it didn’t work , when shen jiu said yes , it was because he had wanted this to happen but didn’t know how to ask

Good job kids !

They all excitedly rushed to shen yuan’s side again , he looked a bit surprised , but in front of these kids , shen yuan smiled softly , shen jiu didn’t react to it like he expected , with warmth in his chest and a wish to see it again , or with ugly jealousy at it not being directed at him , no , he didn’t like it at all , that smile didn’t reach shen yuan’s eyes , who dulled for a second as if immersed in far memories

“master shen ! master shen ! could you teach us the technique you used to put out that fire ? are you strong ? can you spar with us ? do you know how to play the guqin ? can you play for us ?”

Uh yingying , calm down ?

Unfortunately for shen yuan , the kids followed her example and asked him tones of questions , again

“wait, wait , can we discuss this at a later time ? when you are all ready to give one question at a time ? I am sorry but I can’t play much , and for training , maybe one day ? but not now , I need to go”

“eh ? go where ?” asked ming fan , who had been the most silent and polite of the bunch

“in a village not that far away , I need to bring something to an ah … acquaintance”

Shen qingqiu nodded

“and since this master is accompanying him…..”

“wait you are ?”

“…. Ming fan and luo binghe should get ready to take care of this one’s work ” shen jiu finished and open his fan

Shen yuan had a complicated expression as if internally debating and comparing the pros and cons , but seemed to accept his fate and just said “I need to go today thought”

“no problem”

Shen yuan insisted that they couldn’t get a carriage from cang qiong , but he also promised that they wouldn’t ride their sword for the entirety of the travel

“look , just , try not to question anything and trust me”

Well if that wasn’t suspicious , only a fool would go along-

“alright”

….

Their first stop was at a bakery , a young lady was at the counter , smiling softly with a “this lowly one greet immortal masters” it seemed that she already saw her share of cultivators since that was not the typical reaction , but when her eyes landed on shen yuan she smiled a bit wider , a bit more real , and shen jiu glared

“should I call uncle ?”shen yuan nodded , and a middle aged man came

“brother sanshi” shen yuan greeted

“xiao yuan ?” he looked at shen qingqiu with suspicion , and shared a look with shen yuan , then just handed him a qiankun pouch

“I added some pastries , for the travel”

Shen yuan nodded “thank you”

Seeing this quick , business like interaction , shen qingqiu didn’t know what to think , one look at the girl and he knew that she was aware of what they were doing , but he could conclude that she didn’t know everything

So he observed , the only other similarity shen jiu found was their neck

Both sanshi and shen yuan had some sort of bandage over it , what shen qingqiu had thought was for an injurie now look like might be something more

In the end they did take a carriage , an old looking one that was surprisingly comfortable , shen jiu knew the humble look was done on purpose , because who can afford fire-resistant durable wood of the south , and not good craftsmen ?

He huffed as he positioned himself more elegantly , glaring at the ceiling to avoid thinking about his situation

He is alone with shen yuan in a closed space , he can smell the scent of pine and cinnamon from him , or maybe he is imagining it , but he swear he can

Pressing his lips , he hid behind his fan , shen yuan isn’t looking at him , which is upsetting , but it also mean he wouldn’t see any crack in his mask

Still , the lack of attention quickly got on his nerves

“would you explain what exactly are we doing ?” he asked startling shen yuan out his daydreams

“hm ? oh well , I am going to deliver some things , and maybe help around a bit ?”

Oh , how vague , the fact that shen yuan didn’t trust him with information was a bitter pill to swallow , but not too hard , he wasn’t delusional , if shen yuan did he would be an idiot , and although shen jiu had a history with loving stupid people (qi-ge) he did hope this one was different

Or maybe it wasn’t , who in their right mind challenge the emperor of the three realm ?

“and who was that man ?”

“brother sanshi ? a bakery owner” shen yuan stopped himself from adding ‘duh’ then quickly added “didn’t I say no question ?” shen jiu almost froze at the tone , did he-“I promise , maybe not today , but let these question in that pretty head of yours , I am sure you would come up with wonderful assumption , I can only promise we do no harm”

Shen jiu didn’t know if he should be flattered or offended, so he set himself on both , and glared

Shen yuan laughed , and if that didn’t just tie a knot on his stomach …..

“I know you might not trust me , but give some face to you shidi , would he really make shabby connections ?”

“yes” replied shen jiu, even if another soul is inhabiting shang qinghua’s body , it still look like he is drooling over a demon

he saw a look of realization pass shen yuan’s face , did he also know ?

“I forgot” shen yuan mumbled , so he did “well , then , isn’t shen bao adorable ?” what does this have to do with anything ? “if I was a criminal , I am pretty sure it would reflect on her education ” he nodded to himself looking confident

Shen jiu now knew shen yuan to be the kind of guardian that swore the little devil spawn they had was an angel , seeing no wrong in their action , shen jiu couldn’t possibly refute him on this one

“she is very polite”

He raised an eyebrow , ok maybe shen jiu was a bit wrong since he looked like he didn’t believe him on that one

“debatable” shen yuan scoffed

Shen jiu felt offended on her behalf

“she was with me”

“what polite ? I heard your discussion , she seemed eager to take you into the family”

Shen jiu blushed , tightening his hold on the fan and further hiding behind it , shen yuan’s finger itched to remove it

he only sniffed

“she call everyone she meet by endearing terms , and wouldn’t understand if it is inappropriate some times” then he paused “but she must really like you , because she never did it to a stranger on the first meeting”

Hearing this , shen jiu didn’t believe it , what was there to like about him ? still…. It made him feel a bit happy

It didn’t take long for shen yuan to be comfortable enough to be the one to ask questions , shen jiu never talked that long with someone , even with his jiejies he listened mostly , still , he did his best to answer everything , the question went from simple small talk to him bothering him to tell of his own adventure , however fortunately for shen jiu’s throat , shen yuan soon started yapping about all sort of beast and plant , even him , the qing jing peak lord , who read the library thrice (counting his first life , does he look like that much of a nerd ?) was in awe with the amount of information shen yuan got

The travel ended up better than expected ….

Entering the inn , shen jiu payed for 2 rooms despite shen yuan’s protest of ‘I can pay !’ and the shameless ‘we could share a room’

No , shen jiu wouldn’t live through it , the ridiculous proximity was already doing things to his heart , he might have a qi deviation right there and then

Entering his room , he sat on the bed taking a moment to realize that this is in fact reality and hugged himself , breathing in and out he couldn’t stop even if he tried the grin that broke into his face , his cheeks hurt from how wide he is smiling but he couldn’t help it

He was absolutely happy , he even let out a laugh

This feeling … it was refreshing, did he ever feel like this ? it must have been a lifetime ago (literally), when he was still in the street , and qi-ge’s care and praise were like the most prized treasure

He felt into his bed and found himself unable to sleep , not for the usual reasons , this time , from pure excitement

Still he went to change into some cloth and before that , he remembered the bathing era that is in this inn

He got up , slowly making his way into one of the private baths , smaller than the public one , but for a higher price

He only stopped next to one , a weird qi made it way out , barely noticeable if shen jiu didn’t already familiarize himself with it ,it was shen yuan’s

Shen yuan was bathing here ….

he almost opened the door , before retracting his hand face burning

he wasn’t a pervert ! it wouldn’t do breaking his benefactor’s trust like this !

However just when he was about to go, the door opened and someone pulled him into the room

Chapter Text

His back hit the wall with a tud ,a cool metal on his neck drew blood , it happened so fast that the fear and pain only caught up when he was no longer in the man’s grasp

“shen qingqiu ?!” it was shen yuan , he eyes wide with panic “oh god what were you doing there ?!”

The tone made shen jiu flinch and as he put a hand on his neck feeling the warmth of blood , his body was drenched in cold sweat , he couldn’t open his mouth to explain himself

“I am sorry” he heard shen yuan say “I thought you were someone else !” he caught him in his arm and shen jiu flinched from the touch once again , yet shen yuan seemed to ignore it as he lent him qi , not the uncomfortable one that he seemed to prefer using and had been leaking from the door , but normal qi , he wondered how it was possible for a second , was this really shen yuan or someone pretending to be him ?

Soon his face was cupped between two calloused hands , his head a turned a few times before it was let go

His body no longer hurt

“so ?” shen yuan asked

Alright , shen jiu knew for a fact his reputation isn’t the best , and he know what it might have looked like for him to be standing next to a bathing person’s door , he could explain himself , shen yuan … shen yuan would surely believe him right ?

Yet he was still so afraid , he was so quickly overpowered , that even someone like him couldn’t feel the blow until too late , it made him unconsciously wary of shen yuan , his heart and mind were in turmoil and he didn’t know what he should think about first

“I-” he couldn’t even speak , he hasn’t gotten better , no matter how much he tried his heart demons were always chasing him , he couldn’t say anything , because did he even have a tongue anymore ? wasn’t his throat cut by xuan su’s shards ? he was getting dismembered- no he was resurrected and used by that beast , he can only hear , he can’t move , he is powerless to stop anything

“shen qingqiu ?” a voice snapped him out of his stupor , a hand on his wrist that he didn’t feel being there , sending him qi

Something soft settled in shen yuan’s gaze , there was worry too , why was he worried ? he should be angry

“I am sorry for startling you” shen yuan said

Why does he keep apologizing ?

Obvious to the meaning of shen jiu’s stare , shen yuan gently released his wrist and awkwardly scratched his cheeks

“you shouldn’t apologies” shen jiu hurriedly said “it was my fault for stopping there”

But shen yuan looked at him weirdly , shen jiu wondered if he said something wrong

“but , you are afraid of me now”

And shen jiu flinched from that sentence , no he wasn’t , not really , maybe being manhandled like that didn’t bring the most pleasant memory , but he wasn’t scared , why would he ? he couldn’t bear to look at his face

“shen qingqiu” he was called “I am sorry”

He hated these words , it made him grit his teeth and shot a glare at shen yuan , yet he froze , what greeted him wasn’t yue qingyuan –why was he even expecting that ?- nor was it a face full of guilt

It was a confident face , he looked worried too , but seemed determined to make it up , it looked …. It looked like liu qingge’s but less … righteous ? in a good way , if that made sense

“whoever it is that you thought I was” shen jiu didn’t know why he was talking “I will help you stop them”

A flash of surprised passed on shen yuan’s face , before turning into a smile that didn’t quite reach his eye but had some amusement in it either way

“en , I will be in your care then” shen yuan settled to say before anything ,then he frowned before returning to his teasing personality trying to ease the situation “ah but , take care of me now would you ?” he pointed to his head “I would need help washing and taking care of this too long hair” and , like he finally remembered where they were , shen jiu flushed red

His eyes darted downward , and luckily , shen yuan was covered , or else shen jiu wouldn’t survive it

He glared harder at shen yuan , hoping his face wasn’t as red as it felt,(it was…)

Shen yuan so obviously didn’t mean it , but shen jiu wasn’t going to say no

“then sit” he ordered , and it was shen yuan’s turn to be caught off guard , pink cheeked

“eh ?”

“sit”

And the fool did just that , giving shen jiu full view of his naked back

Shen jiu raised his hands , hesitating and unbelieving before taking the soft silky black hair between his fingers , shen yuan lent him a brush and they stayed in silence like this

Shen jiu’s body although didn’t stop shaking , his cold fingers warmed up slowly , he was still scared to be completely honest , and it frustrated him , being scared of someone who deserve to take him body and soul

Still

‘I thought you were somebody else’

Shen jiu’s gaze darkened ,ah … it look like he have work to do , he can’t have someone who want to hurt his beloved roaming free , if he can know more ….

Wait- beloved ? why would he call him tha-

Suddenly , his hand found themselves tracing the white bandage on shen yuan’s neck

“there is a scrap god whose statue have these around his neck ” shen jiu said

Shen yuan shivered from the touch , stayed silent

“that … brother of yours have the same , why is that ?”

Shen yuan stayed silent , and shen jiu stopped , how did that matter exactly ? shen jiu wasn’t in any place to question his benefactor , so he brushed shen yuan’s hair in a comfortable silence , after he finished he braided it and slowly got up , yet shen yuan grabbed his wrist and pulled him , as he didn’t expect it , shen jiu with a squeak fell on his lap his hand supporting him grabbing shen yuan’s shoulder

“don’t you have a lot of questions ?”

“huh ?”

Shen yuan looked at him strangely, eyes holding many emotions

“you have so many question , why don’t you ask ?”

Shen jiu stayed silent , his hands on shen yuan’s shoulders tightening the hold

“what do you want me to know ?”

A weird look went into shen yuan’s face

“that’s it ? what if I don’t want to tell you anything ?”

“then it is none of my business” replied shen jiu , tone certain

Shen yuan thought for a bit

“what I want you to know is simple , me , sanshi and that hua-jie of yours , we are all a ‘family’ , there is no better term for it , some of our branches have names , yes , but we as a whole don’t , we just- we just work together that’s it”

Shen jiu ‘s eyes narrowed taking in the information

a-jiu ! please I know people ! they will hide you , please just leave that sect ! listen to me just this once ! a-jiu ! wait !

the hand that held shen yuan’s shoulder gripped harder

“and your sister ?”

“shen bao ? she is my sister but not really- I- it’s complicated , she know nothing , I would like to keep it that way , please , peak lord shen ”

Pursing his lips , shen jiu’s head rested on shen yuan’s chest

“call me shen jiu”

Putting a hand on shen jiu’s back , shen yuan smiled

“shen jiu”

That night , shen jiu mediated and decided , no matter what , even if he kill him , he will follow his benefactor in whatever he do

One day earlier : cang qiong

Two female qing jing senior disciple sat on the ground , serious expression on their face , as if they are getting ready to for a war

A baizhan hall master stopped on his way , he took his time to look , blinking and wiping his eyes , seeing the rare sight –qingjing disciples ‘willingly’ on baizhan- didn't disapear , he gave an offended look at the wine bottle on his hand and wondered what happened to his alcohol resistance

The hallmaster decided that since he was obviously hallucinating he should just go beat some disciples to sober up

Alternatively , the qing jing disciples , let’s call them ‘a-li’ and ‘xiaoxiao’ respectively , as the author is in no way going to be creative

a-li let out a huge sigh

“this should be recorded in history”

Xiaoxiao nodded

a-li “the qing jing peak lord , our darling shizun , shen qingqiu , is a softy for a man”

xiaoxiao nodded , albeit more hesitantly , still in the ‘denial’ phase of grieving her one sided teacher crush

“girl are you in drugs ?” a baizhan brute walked up to them , next to him another uh … brute , let’s call them baizhan brute #1 and #2 respectively as they are still in the low rank of NPC “there is no way that shen-shibo would go soft for anyone”

Xiaoxiao nodded eagerly , she was elbowed by a-li

Just as baizhan brute # 1 was planning on maybe reporting these 2 qing jing disciple on possible substance abuse as hallucinating shen fucking qingqiu being soft would need a 2 near overdose , he saw it ,he fucking saw it and came to the logical conclusion of

The world is ending …

As in :

Shen qingqiu walking side by side with an another cultivator , his gaze full of warmth , his finger twitching next to the man’s sleeve , as if he wanted to cling to him like a neglected spoiled wife

Baizhan brute # 1 ‘s jaw hit a-li’s head and he seemed to be going through some life changing change while baizhan brute #2 seemed to be one (1) ‘shizun smile’ away from a serious qi deviation

Xiaoxiao gritted her teeth shooting an unassuming shen yuan nasty glares

It’s just …. The more baizhan brute #1 looked the more he felt like the probabilities of the world around him were moving , and with a dramatic swoosh , the wind around him fluttered his robes and hair , giving him an off putting philosophical aura

“so that’s how it is …” he muttered “this is how it feel to have a personality”

Hao tai aka bai zhan brute #1 post serious character development [+ one (1) backstory bonus package !] aka ex-NPC looked around him with clearer eyes

“I am a changed man” he said

Meanwhile , baizhan brute #2 qi-deviated !

That ugly hoe saw shen qingqiu smile !

Chapter Text

When awake , shen jiu dressed himself slowly and brushed his hair with the upmost care , putting in a little qi so that it stay that way , he then did his skin care routine

After that he put on some beauty product and pulled the perfect ‘no makeup only natural beauty here dog’ makeup , he then lightly perfumed himself , the perfect quantity so that it will only be smelt from very next to him

Checking himself in the mirror as he finished making himself presentable the same way he did for years now , you know, just in case he meet a certain someone

In the end he got out looking like the aloof and cold peak lord , uncaring of mortal affair

And he was, until he saw some woman talking with his shen yuan , and his indifferent mask could be damned twice over in hell , his glare , previously fair to all breathing organism singled her out

Sensing it, the woman was startled

She stopped talking with the cultivator , raising her eyes to look over his shoulders , seeing the beauty that glared at her as if she was below dirt she soon realized that she didn’t need to stay ANY longer here

Yelling “I hope you both have 2 kids and a dog !” just so to make sure her intention were clear , she run to the back stage

“What did she want ?” shen jiu ask , looking over shen yuan

Shen yuan hesitated for one second before turning to him , expression grave

Opening his mouth , he spew bullshit

“she gave us an unskipable side quest , god- I hate quest giving NPCs”

“what?”

“it’s not even important just some filler the author want so that she can get an excuse to drop some lore”

“….”

“so… well yeah… technically some monster , like- big monster is out of the village now destroying things and killing … things”

“eh ? why can’t we feel it then ? I am a peak lord , you have a mysterious past and powers , surely we would of have sensed it by now”

“plot inconvenience ? I stopped caring a long time ago, come on, let’s just kill it”

“ok”

Shen jiu looked at the big monster that destroyed things and killed things and he suddenly felt that something was very very wrong…

First of all , at first glance this was obviously a tailed berserk black bear , annoyance he killed multiple times

But that’s only at first glance , because when it turned around, it saliva was green and purple, and he assure you , tailed berserk ANY FRICkinG COLO_uR bear are not supposed to have that

He tried to warn shen yuan but the younger man immediately pushed him out of that bear’s tail's way , that swung with more speed than it was supposed to have , not that shen jiu know what it is anymore , but this feel like something he know , there is a dèja vue to this creature

Shen yuan sent a violent qi blast before shouting “get out of the way!” shen jiu couldn’t argue , not with the haunted expression shen yuan was wearing

Now he remember , at some point in his first life , a dozen different beasts were found having strangely colored saliva , eyes , fur or horns as well as a stronger everything

It had been theorized that they may have ate some things that they weren’t supposed to , but the plant in question could not be tracked , at that time , so many of his material siblings would hint at how easy it would be if they still had their war god , if only someone didn’t just ruin it , and shen qingqiu had been imprisoned before he could know more of it at all

Actually, isn’t this a bit early for them to appear? or did the other cultivators find out too late ?

Refocusing on the fight , he observed shen yuan’s fighting style, it was apparent that he learned how to fight by fighting , not that he fought badly , but for shen jiu , who observed various fighting styles in his two lifetimes could pick up on it

It was violent, and not at all like how shen yuan behave, but then neither does he , the qing jing peak lord fight with elegance and beauty and it is common knowledge that his heart have none

Shen jiu continued to watch with barely concealed awe as shen yuan fought , blood that isn’t his all over him , it tied a knot in the pit of his stomach , he think , this is the first time he thought of someone to be cool and amazing

The bear swayed his tail again , and hit the ground to make shen yuan lose his footing , but shen yuan had seen that coming , already he had jumped before that happened , sword in hand , he tried to stab the bear’s head , but that beast opened it mouth to have a bite of the sword –and half of shen yuan- instead , it was easily seen through , and a qi blast blew the jaw away

The bear shrieked, it was then attacked by thousands of flying leaf by shen Jiu who didn’t want to just observe the fight like a useless spectator

The distraction he gave had been enough for shen yuan to stab the bear’s head in a killing blow

“shen yuan” he called , walking closer to the man

Shen yuan glared at the bear , before giving shen jiu a complicated look

“so” shen yuan started “can you pretend you never saw this bear ?”

The awkward request made shen jiu stop , still , if that’s what his benefactor want then …

“ok”

Really , where is the bear ?  better yet , who is the bear ? even better- why is the bear ? but never , how is the bear , shen jiu doesn’t care about that

“it’s complicated to explain , I sw- wait ? really?”

Shen jiu nodded, he did not need to know anything

However for some reason , shen yuan who didn’t want to explain anything felt the need to do so now

“it’s not a natural thing” he started “it’s done by some experiments , it’s alright , me and the others will make sure they don’t bother anyone , just don’t report it ? ok ?”

“of course”

Shen yuan’s smile grew stained

“you ….”

Shen yuan seemed suspicious , but ultimately decided that arguing was of no use , he gave one last look at that bear , kicked it head in a rare show of hatred at went to their carriage followed by shen jiu , who didn’t speak a word more

The forest was dark and ominous, barely any light passed throught, but enough to at least have a day/night cycle , not that it seem to make any difference to the creatures here , god , do they even sleep ? shen yuan is sure that they do , but it is so irregular and unnatural that all the knowledge he have from pidw is useless

Sitting with his back against a tree , he hugged the baby in his arm a bit tighter

“should we camp here ?” asked a female voice , the woman who approached him , had her brown hair tucked in a tight bun , shen yuan remember that she wanted to cut it , if it hadn’t been by his and some others reasoning of , when we get out , people would think you are a criminal ! then she would have a bob cut right now , if only because there is no right material for a buzz cut

“whatever qiang-jie want” he say instead , which was the right answer , it always was the right answer , li qiang always wanted to feel in control and reliable , shen yuan wouldn’t take it from her , she is only 18 , let her have it , he is an adult technically , died once and transmigrated and all that shit

Still , he can’t help but feel tired

A hand tugged on his hair , he looked down to his youngest sister , her eyes were teary , but she didn’t cry , shen yuan felt guilt at being partially responsible for it , he hope her baby brain would forget all about it , although he do know it doesn’t work that way , he know some part of her would know , he is still unsure , if this really is a better fate for the child , if death wouldn’t be kinder , but he had already failed so many other , he doesn’t want to fail her too , not his little treasure

Searching in his bag , he take that breast shaped like flower , massaging it with qi before he put the tip in her mouth , you do not want to know how this was used in pidw ….trust me buddy

Anyway!

The little girl gripped the flower tight , although his hair is still being pulled , and frankly , it’s starting to hurt , he payed it no mind

“Slow down little treasure , it isn’t going anywhere” he whispered fondly

Li qiang who was talking with their other brother paused and turned to him

“did you finally choose a name for her ? xiao bao ? really ?”

The other older man just tapped her shoulder

“let him a-qiang , isn’t she a treasure in her own right ?”

It was meant to be an inside joke about that , but everyone –even him- grimaced at it, it wasn’t funny

Still, shen yuan ignored it, hmm , shen bao ? it’s not that bad of a name is it ? he isn’t good at names , he only named his account and it was peerless cucumber , really , nothing to write home about

“I will see later” he need to think more about it , he want it to be the best , he want to make sure she have a good name , that she know she was and will always be loved whenever someone call her by it , maybe treasure is a bit biased , but it is a name

“no- yes- I mean , that baby … that child would be the death of you ! you can’t escape with her ! please stay-”

Remembering that suddenly made him angry , yeah , he will show her that at least he isn’t a coward , not like her , he will make sure his little treasure is well cared for after they get out of here

He will spoil her rotten , she wouldn’t feel the need to anything , she will grow loved , strong and most importantly free

He will raise her into a kind and smart young lady , if she want to marry he will personally shovel talk that man , if she is in need for help she would know to complain to him even if it about a shitty small paper cut

Fuck yes , he will do this parenting thing right and prove her wrong

He ignore the part that want to return , that is yelling that she promised to change , to be better , but shen yuan , the millennial crushed that hope , she said it so many times already , why would this time be any different ? he doesn’t miss her , just what she could have been , maybe in another universe , they would get along as mother and son , but it certainly isn’t in this one

His body may be fifteen, but he isn’t , not really

Putting that flower in his bag , he pressed a kiss on his xiao bao’s forehead , pinching her cheeks , he smiled when she grinned , a toothless adorable grin

The moment was ruined when he felt something wet drop on his hair , when he raised his hands to touch it and found saliva , yellow , shining fucking glowing saliva

Looking up , a bird like beast was looking down at them , it eyes were hollow , the feathers ruffled , and the face dripping with blood

Shen yuan didn’t scream , too used to such horror-games like sight , he just put a hand on xiao bao’s mouth and gotten ready to run