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Summary
But Hyunjin knew himself better than this. He knew, as soon as he was behind closed doors, he would do it again, and again, and again, until his mind would shut up, until the pain was enough to keep the demons at bay, until the adrenalin got him high enough to forget about everything else.
Because he was an addict. And he’d been stupid enough to think he would never relapse.
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Hyunjin has left his old self behind – or so he thinks.
He has never planned to meet Chan and fall head over heels in love with him, but there is just something about him that takes Hyunjin right up to cloud nine. However, as things get more serious, Hyunjin can’t bring himself to show him his most vulnerable side. He’s convinced Chan would never love that version of him, the version he’s supposedly left behind. Too scared to lose him, he thus starts hiding and lying.
Hyunjin wants to come clean, but what if Chan figures it all out first?
Or: Hyunjin is madly in love with Chan and shitscared of losing him, so he tries hiding his self-harm scars and dating past.