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The Worst Idea Ever

Summary:

Draco has a bad idea, and Theo can't talk him out of it.

Work Text:

Theo sighed mightily as he leaned back in his chair before the roaring fire, running a hand over his face in exasperation. Across from him sat his best friend and brother, Draco, who was plotting once again. It was utterly insufferable; Theo hated when he got like this, and really wished he could talk some sense into his friend for once. He didn’t like his chances, though.

 

“Run it by me again, Dray. You want to do what, exactly?” Theo asked in an aggrieved tone. Draco scoffed at him, throwing an arm across the back of his chair in a visibly insufferable way. 

 

“It’s the perfect plan. I’ll make it seem like I’m mooning all over Pans, or letting her moon all over me, and when Granger seems most riled up about it I’ll dramatically break up with Pans and then ask Granger out. She’ll have been stewing in jealousy for so long, she won’t be able to say no!” Draco smirked, looking to all the world as if he were a genius rather than a total idiot. Theo ground his teeth together before responding.

 

“It’s the worst idea ever.” Theo said, voice straining to remain neutral. Draco smirked.

 

“Yeah, I know.” He said with pride. “It’s a bad idea, and I’m all about it. It’s so terrible , it can’t possibly fail. Not like my other plans, which we won’t speak of.” 

 

Theo winced, taking a deep calming breath as Draco leapt from his chair and stalked out of the common room. He wasn’t looking forward to listening to his friend whinge and complain when this truly awful plan failed. Hermione was going to eat him alive, and would likely hex him into the next century before going out with him. Especially since it was painfully obvious that Draco knew nothing about women of substance.

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