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English
Series:
Part 2 of The Killing Moon
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Published:
2012-10-10
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3,539
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1/1
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He Will Wait Until (You Give Yourself To Him)

Summary:

“Do you remember Halloween?” Derek speaks up finally and Stiles doesn’t laugh that of course he does, just says “yeah” quietly, because Derek will make his point when he’s ready.

Or, the one where everybody gets told the truth.

Notes:

So, I sort of wasn't done with writing in The Killing Moon verse, so this just sort of happened. Because that's what I do, write sort of thought out sequels to things I wrote in the spur of the moment anyway. There might be more of this eventually because I kind of love the dynamics in this, so I hope you guys do too! Unbeta'd as usual, title still comes from Echo and the Bunnymen's The Killing Moon.

Work Text:

It’s been a long day of training and Stiles kind of regrets everything. Regrets promising Derek his weekends and accepting the bite and he’s pretty sure his arm is broken in five different spots and he can feel it healing but it still hurts like a bitch. He gets it, that he needs this, that he above the rest of the pack needs training because he can do the most damage, that Derek needs him more than anybody else to be in control of himself. They all remember the way Peter was as a rogue alpha, they need Stiles in check so the alpha pack doesn’t try to kill them all because of it. Derek has enough trouble convincing them he can handle this on his own, if Stiles is pure animal for just one second... well they’re doomed.

“You really suck at this.” Derek snarks over him, moving out of the way before Stiles’ foot connects with his shin. Derek is a dick and Stiles kind of hates him.

“I’m only as good as my teacher.” Stiles spits back. He climbs to his feet and holds his broken arm to his chest, turning his back to Derek to grab his bag. It serves his purpose; he doesn’t actually like seeing Derek’s face when he reminds him that he’s a shit alpha. Stiles is too at this point, but he’s only been a werewolf for all of nine days at this point.

“Tomorrow, Stiles.” Derek calls out to him as Stiles leaves him at the house to get into his Jeep, wincing each time he has to move his arm.

“You’re a sadist!” Stiles calls back, but they both know he’ll show up. He’s got nothing better to do anyway.

--

“Why is he here again?” Danny nods his head towards Stiles, talks about him like he’s not in the room. It’s sort of irritating, and would probably be a problem if his wolf wasn’t utterly exhausted of being thrown around the woods by Derek all day. His whole body still hurts and he just wants to lie on the couch with his head in Lydia’s lap until she gets bored and wants Jackson’s attention again. So, he ignores the comment and closes his eyes, concentrating only on Lydia’s fingers on his scalp.

“He’s our friend now, it’s complicated.” Jackson’s shit at giving people answers, and he still doesn’t exactly like Stiles. It probably has something to do with the whole being close with his girlfriend thing, especially when the entire world knows about Stiles’ crush on Lydia.

“We should tell him.” Lydia speaks up, more demanding it of Stiles than suggesting it, and he sighs, because yeah. She knows what it’s like to be left out of the loop and she won’t be happy doing it to anyone else. So Stiles sits up and looks at Jackson, who’s nervous and shaking his head no, because Derek doesn’t want more people than necessary in the pack, doesn’t want all these extra people knowing and in danger, but Stiles figures hey, he’s in danger just being friends with them anyway.

“We’re werewolves, Lydia’s immune. It was this whole thing last year. Jackson was a crazy murdering lizard monster.” Stiles shrugs, because it’s easy to joke about it after the fact, and well, the truth plainly sounds just as crazy as elaborating would.

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.” Danny sounds kind of offended by how outrageous the lie seems to be. Stiles looks at Jackson and lets out a low growl to make him change, and Stiles climbs off the couch and pulls off his shirt. Danny’s staring at Jackson in horror, because as pretty as he is as a human, Jackson is an ugly as fuck werewolf. They all are, actually, and it’s kind of why Stiles likes taking the alpha form instead, because he much prefers being an actual wolf, padding around Danny in a circle before sitting at his feet, nudging his head at his hand. Danny looks even more horrified at this. “What? Oh my god, what?”

Stiles moves behind the couch to change back, smiling gratefully when Lydia tosses him his clothes so he doesn’t have to be seen naked in a room full of inordinately good looking people.

“Werewolves.” He shrugs again and Danny falls back on the loveseat with his head in his hands, trying to process what he had just seen.

--

“Werewolves.” Stiles isn’t that surprised that his dad is looking at him like he’s crazy. He’s sort of used to this look by now, and it’s not like he really wants to tell him all of this, but it’s sort of only fair at this point. Also, Melissa McCall sort of dropped the bomb on him earlier in the night when they were on a date, assuming that since Stiles had been turned his dad knew too. He gets why the sheriff thinks everyone he knows is crazy, because well, werewolves.

“It’s a really long story.” Stiles says apologetically, fiddling with the bag of baby carrots he was demolishing before his dad came in.

“I’ve got time.” His dad glares and sits down in the chair across from him, and Stiles slumps down, crossing his arms on the table before resting his chin on his wrist.

“The Hales were all werewolves, the Argents are hunters. Kate burned down the Hale house and killed everybody but Derek and Peter and Derek’s sister Laura. Peter was in the hospital and Derek and Laura went away, but then Laura came back when Peter healed enough to be a werewolf again. And that’s where we all come in.” Stiles takes a deep breath, not looking at his dad because really, this whole thing is sort of Stiles’ fault when it comes down to it. “Peter killed Laura because Laura was an alpha and Peter wanted to be an alpha. You know the part about her being dead and me in the woods, and Scott was with me, and Peter bit Scott. So, Scott turned into a werewolf, made first line, started dating Allison, all of that. Derek sort of was helping but overall he kind of sucked at it. Umm..” Stiles pauses, trying to think of what’s actually relevant to tell his dad here. Looking at him, he feels terrible, because his face has fallen and he looks kind of like this might all be making sense in a weird way. “So, it turned out Peter was killing all those people. Because you know, crazy? Also he wanted revenge for the Hale house fire, so... it makes sense right?” Stiles sighs and moves his head down to hit on the table before sitting back up again. His dad is silent still, waiting for the rest to come, because he knows there’s more to this than just that.

“So, um, Peter really wanted Scott to join his pack, so he tried to get Scott to kill me and Allison and that night at the school, it was Peter, not Derek. And then um, you know, with the formal. Lydia went to look for Jackson and Peter attacked her and bit her and he wanted to kill her, he would have killed her, but he needed me to help find Derek. So.. that was why I left her there, dad, I didn’t want to I swear I didn’t, but I had to, because he would have killed her, it was the right thing to do, I swear.” He’s desperate for his dad to believe him on this, that he wasn’t the sort of guy who would ditch a girl who was hurt, and definitely not one to hurt her. He doesn’t look at him though, because this is harder than he thought it would be, just scrubs his hands through his hair and soldiers on. “So, after the hospital Jackson and I went to the school to make molotov cocktails like Lydia taught us..” he ignores the sharp intake of breath and the loud “Stiles!”, “and we went to the Hale house because that’s where Peter went to go find Derek and Scott. He had already killed Kate and he was gonna kill Scott and Derek so we kinda set him on fire and then Derek killed him and became the alpha. So, Derek bit Jackson, and that sort of made everything worse? Because he didn’t become a werewolf, he was a kanima and he was the one killing everyone? That Matt killed. Because Matt was controlling him and Jackson was just doing what Matt wanted him to do, and you knew the whole thing with Matt already. So, that was why we kidnapped Jackson. Well, not kidnapped that sounds so bad, we like... temporary hid him away? So he wouldn’t kill anybody, we needed to figure out what to do, except you know, I left Scott and Allison with him and he got out.” Stiles sighs again, sitting up to look across the table at his dad, who looks like he just aged a good ten years. “What else... oh yeah, Derek bit Isaac before his dad died, but that was the kanima, not him. He bit Boyd and Erica too, so you know, werewolves. Um, that time with the mechanic? Jackson paralyzed me, because he had a paralytic toxin in his claws. Lydia’s immune to the bite, but she got possessed by Peter and helped resurrect him. So, Peter’s back, but Derek’s still an alpha. Um, the gay club, we were really there for Jackson, because we thought he was going to kill Danny? But I don’t know, we should probably still have that talk?” Stiles laughs awkwardly before sobering up and getting back to the topic at hand. “Allison’s mom tried to kill Scott, Derek bit her on accident, but the whole hunters thing, she killed herself instead. Gerard was crazy, he had cancer and werewolves heal most things so, he wanted to become one? Even though he hates them, so he hatched this crazy plan to have Scott get Derek to bite him so he could be a wolf and then kill Derek to become the alpha, but Scott and Deaton switched his pills with mountain ash so he couldn’t become a werewolf. And Jackson’s a werewolf now too, but I mean, don’t get me started on how that happened because I don’t even know. The power of love or something?” Stiles snorts but his dad still looks horrified. “Gerard was the one who beat me up, by the way. And then the alpha pack showed up, and they’re like... irritating, they want to get rid of Derek, but mostly they’re just sort of cleaning up his mess because he’s terrible and Scott won’t join his pack and he stole Isaac from Derek and it’s just a huge pain in my ass, because I’m was always on Scott’s side and helping him but like he doesn’t need me anymore.”

“So when did you...”

“Oh, when I got bit? Halloween? Everybody in town turned into their costumes thanks to some witches, but the alphas took care of it so we didn’t have to. I was a werewolf so... I mean, it was cool. And I know stuff already, and I mean... it made sense.” He doesn’t know why he expects his dad to get it, but he finds his blow up at that kind of surprising.

“Made sense? How on earth does becoming a monster willingly make sense? You’re barely seventeen, Stiles, and you’ll be this thing for the rest of your life! Didn’t you think about that?” And his words hurt, but Stiles understands them, lowers his head down in submission again.

“The thing is, dad, that I’m involved in this whether I like it or not. I don’t really have a choice anymore, and like... when Peter offered, I wanted it. But I didn’t want to be tied to him; I didn’t want to be something uncontrollable like I saw Scott was. But then so much stuff happened, and I couldn’t fix things. I couldn’t make them better and I felt weak and I was always afraid for you. And then Gerard and... and I spent a night finally knowing what it was like to have some kind of power, some ability to help make things better. And I wasn’t out of control, and I wasn’t... I wasn’t a total monster.” He looks back up at his dad again slowly, because this he needs to understand, this he needs to know. “I’m not a mindless monster, dad, I’m an alpha. I’m gonna help Derek and I’m gonna fix things and make them better. I couldn’t do that when I was normal, I wasn’t anything special, I...”

“You were special enough, kid.” His dad doesn’t let him say anything else, just gets up and walks away. Stiles hears him go up the stairs and he just feels like his world is crumbling around him. He stays like that, just staring into space, his face buried into the crook of his elbow. The back door opens quietly, but Stiles doesn’t move, not until Derek runs his fingers through his hair and whispers to him that everything will be okay. It won’t, not anytime soon, but it’s time to pretend it will be for the time being.

--

There’s a weird sense of quiet in Beacon Hills in December. The alpha pack finally leaves town, there are no monsters that aren’t supposed to be there, and everything is still and quiet in the way that only winter can be. Stiles arranges the pack to have a I-Don’t-Care-What-You-Celebrate-But-We’re-Exchanging-Gifts party (everyone’s just been calling it Secret Alpha and he’s really annoyed he didn’t think of it first). It’s their first night of break from school and everyone’s gathered together at Jackson’s, his parents went away to Aspen for the holidays, so the place would be empty otherwise. Plus, they had hired a decorator, so in the living room is a giant tree that’s perfect for putting presents under.

Whatever organization Stiles had goes out the window pretty quickly, there’s Christmas songs on the surround sound and hot chocolate being passed around and kissing under the mistletoe. It’s noisy for nine people, the betas all in the living room sharing stories with Lydia and Danny, while Stiles busies himself in the kitchen making another huge batch of hot chocolate. He doesn’t even bother with teasing Derek while he sits at the table and stuffs gift cards into envelopes, because he’s terrible at these things.

“This would be a lot less hokey if we could get drunk, you know.” Stiles points a finger at Derek, because it’s easier to make fun of him for this sober party being his fault than pick on the fact that this is his first holiday with a pack again and he’s not sure Derek’s fragile psyche can handle it.

“You planned it, it was always going to be lame.” Derek grins back at him and steals one of the mugs off the serving tray in Stiles’ arms and all he can do is whine ineffectually as they head back into the living room. And maybe it’s weird, seeing contented faces on all of them, thanking him as they steal mugs from the tray. Derek hands out his envelopes because he’s socially awkward and wants to get this all over with, so Stiles just sits on top of him when he’s done so he can actually sit still. It’s sort of nice being the only person in a room who can actually sort of go toe to toe with Derek, but they’re a team, they work together now.

“Presents!” Scott’s loud and he’s laughing and Stiles can even like Isaac more than the minimum tonight, mainly because Stiles is wearing a Santa hat and this is his fucking Christmas party and he won’t let it be spoiled by anything.

(No one is actually impressed by Derek’s gift cards but they all pretend they are. Stiles will fix him for next year.)

Since Derek ruined the gift giving announcement, Stiles goes next, because as co alpha of the pack (Derek hates when he calls himself that, but it’s true, it’s what Stiles is) he got everybody presents. They vary in sizes and shapes, because well, Stiles put a lot of thought into his gifts. (A pair of shoes Erica had been coveting for months every time they went to the mall; one of the parts Boyd needed to fix his junker of a car; a bottle of Danny’s favorite cologne that Stiles had accidentally spilled all over his room when they had been hanging out one night last month; a sweater for Isaac, because well, it was Isaac, Stiles was never going to put in effort there; a few packs of the guitar strings Scott liked best that happened to be super expensive; a big tug of dinosaur toys for Jackson, because Jackson had everything and there was no way he was going to pass that up; and a necklace with a wolf charm for Lydia.) (Earlier in the day he had left a package in Allison’s mailbox, a necklace with an arrow charm, because even if she wasn’t part of their pack at the moment, he knew one day she probably would be again and at the very least he owed her a thank you from the whole pack for helping to keep them safe all year.) There’s a small pile on top of him afterwards, and therefore on top of Derek, but it’s worth it, he thinks, worth being crushed under the weight of his friends and hearing their laughter and feeling their love. Everyone else had been assigned someone out of a hat, and Stiles sort of can’t help but enjoy the awkwardness of the pack exchanging gifts. (The highlights in Stiles opinion were Erica presenting Jackson with a fluffy stuffed lizard and Danny gifting Derek with a few shirts. “They should actually fit you, Miguel.” And nobody gets it but the three of them, but it’s so worth it when Derek looks absolutely mortified.)

They drink more hot chocolate and listen to more music and Stiles chases Scott around the first floor of the house with a dinosaur in each hand. All in all, when Stiles is cleaning up after everyone when most everyone has left, he feels pretty damn content. He gets his things together and hugs Lydia goodbye, waves to Jackson and Danny, and finally herds Derek out. They part at their cars, but Stiles calls out to him before he can get in his, grinning a little.

“Hey, Derek? Meet me at your place, I still gotta give you your gift.” He gets in the Jeep before Derek can argue.

--

“It’s a hammer.” Derek holds the hammer in his hand, fingers careful to avoid the red ribbon that Stiles painstakingly tied around the handle. He’s obviously not impressed and Stiles rolls his eyes, because Derek is really really terrible about getting gifts.

“It is a hammer, but also, it’s a promise.” Stiles gestures around the house, decay and rot and evidence of many werewolf fights everywhere. “We’re going to spend the next year and a half fixing this place up. Because you can’t live in abandoned places, it’s creepy and weird. And we can’t have pack meetings here, and we can’t always count on someone’s parents being out of town. Mrs. McCall can’t feed us all and my dad’s still weirded out about this whole thing, so we’re gonna fix this up. Because we’re your pack now and you need to take care of us.” Stiles sort of expects it when Derek turns his back to him, because it’s sort of a lot to take. He doesn’t push though, just sits on the steps and watches Derek’s back as he works through his emotions.

“Do you remember Halloween?” Derek speaks up finally and Stiles doesn’t laugh that of course he does, just says “yeah” quietly, because Derek will make his point when he’s ready. “Do you remember what I did? When you first changed in front of me?” And he’s talking about showing his neck, he’s talking about his submission to him. Stiles bites his bottom lip and nods, his “yeah” a little throatier this time. “Do you know why?”

“I didn’t then. I mean, I knew you smelled really really good, but I didn’t figure it out when you did it. Later though, when I was turning back...” Stiles trailed off, because he doesn’t want to talk about it, wants to avoid it until it’s unavoidable, but it is now, because he’s young, because he’s got his whole life ahead of him and he wants to avoid destiny for as long as he can. He knows how this will work, and he’s scared of it, just like Derek is.

“Rebuild our house with me.” Derek holds the hammer out to him and when Stiles looks up at him and grabs it, he can’t help but grin.

“This better be finished by graduation, I want to throw the pack a huge party, they’re gonna deserve it if we make it through the next few years.”

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