Work Text:
Elise waved a short farewell to the townsfolk, making her way along the path to the inn. The setting sun lit the sky a bright crimson along the horizon. A gentle breeze blew past her face, carrying with it the subtle chill of fall. It was a pleasant feeling, after breaking her back all day.
It had been some time since she left Kieferberg behind, setting out on her travels with Lebkuchen. They had left their home behind, expecting a life of freedom and adventure. And yet, here she was, working odd jobs just to barely keep herself fed! Everywhere they went it was the same story! They came into town with no money, so they had to work, and the work didn’t pay much so they had to work sun up to sun down, all for some bread and a room at the inn! This was nothing like what she’d hoped when they set out. This was supposed to be easier, but some things in her life never changed.
Elise turned to gaze in the direction of Kieferberg. Even that grand castle that stood so imposing on the skyline could no longer be seen. In every direction, all that laid before her was the same plain landscape, and the same run down towns. In the late night hours she could feel it, a deep melancholy settling into her heart; one she dared not give voice to. She had to think about Leb.
Elise came to a tall tree at a fork in the path, its leaves turned a golden yellow with the changing of the seasons. On the ground below, these bright, golden leaves had dried and withered to an earthy brown. There, on a rope swing above the piled leaves, was Lebkuchen. She swung idly beneath the tree’s boughs, staring off at the sunset in the distance. Elise smiled weakly.
“Lebkuchen, ready to go?” Elise called.
“Not just yet,” came a quiet reply.
Elise sighed. “You always did love to swing,” she mused.
Lebkuchen just nodded her head. “Can you push me? Really hard, like you used to?” Elise made her way to Lebkuchen, the dried leaves crumbling to dust beneath her feet. She grabbed hold of the ropes on each side of the swing, and began to step back, pulling Lebkuchen with her. With a quick thrust, she pushed the swing forward, Lebkuchen letting out a soft giggle as she soared. Elise waited for Lebkuchen to swing back, placing both hands on her back and pushing her forward again. Lebkuchen began to laugh, kicking her feet as she flew freely through the air.
“Alright, Leb! Get ready!” Elise said, winding up for her strongest push yet.
“Wait, Elise, not too hard!” Lebkuchen protested. Yet as Elise pushed with all of her strength, Lebkuchen went soaring, laughing excitedly as she flew.
“I thought you wanted a strong push,” Elise teased.
“I did, but you’ll break the branch,” Lebkuchen explained. Elise looked up to find that the branch, too, was swaying with an ominous creaking noise. With a mirthless chuckle, Elise relaxed her next push.
The two fell into this rhythm, the push into the air, and the pull back around. “What’s bothering you, Leb?” Elise asked.
“Oh, I hope I wasn’t this obvious all day,” Lebkuchen lamented. “Even Elise is noticing.”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“That you don’t always pay close attention to others,” Lebkuchen answered honestly. Elise grumbled, pushing a little more forcefully as Lebkuchen laughed. “I was just thinking about things,” Lebkuchen said. “About our life now. When we left, I thought about how grand an adventure this would be. How freeing it was to finally leave Father Hans’ strict teachings, and the constant expectations of the townsfolk. But even here, I find myself still listening; still acting like I had before.” Lebkuchen sighed. “I guess it’s harder to change yourself than I thought,” she mused.
Elise retreated into her own thoughts. She understood what Lebkuchen meant, perhaps more than she could admit. She would have given anything to change her life back then. She almost did. Just one more push was all she needed.
But in the end, she couldn’t do it. Something pulled at her, drawing her back to Lebkuchen. She could be so selfish with her. Lebkuchen was special to her; always there to support her every whim with a kind word and some spare bread. Perhaps it was because of that complete, unquestioning support that she fell for her in the first place. Yet in spite of that trust, she was seldom truly honest with her. She could tell her in abstraction what she wanted, but never directly how she felt. How frustrating that must have been, to care for someone so well, and have them hold you at a distance.
Even now, she kept this same rhythm with her. She would pull her close when she needed her, but pushed her away when she wanted something else. They traveled where she wanted, and she was so lax about checking in with Leb, or telling her when she’d be out late. They didn’t spend the time together that she’d promised. The only time they had together were those sweet, quiet evenings in her embrace. But she still couldn’t talk openly. Elise just couldn’t tell her what was in her heart.
Wasn’t that unfair? She loved Lebkuchen, or at least that’s what she always said. She couldn’t be the same, selfish Elise she’d always been with her. She needed to treat her better than that. Lebkuchen needed her to be better.
As Lebkuchen swung back toward her, Elise grabbed hold of the ropes, stepping forward as the swing came to a stop. With a swift motion, she wrapped her arms around Lebkuchen, pulling her close. “Elise?” Lebkuchen asked.
“I’m sorry, Leb,” Elise said. “I know how that feels. It’s why I wanted to escape so badly. But even now, I can’t pull away from who I used to be. This isn’t the life I wanted for us.”
Lebkuchen gently placed a hand over hers. “Oh, it’s not all bad,” she said lightly.
“Leb, I’m being serious!” Elise said, pulling back to stare down at her.
“Me too,” she said with a mischievous smile. “You’re finally telling me how you feel.” Lebkuchen raised a hand to Elise’s cheek. “You never told me what was going on. I always had to dig. All I wanted was for you to open up to me.”
Elise glared down at her. “Wait a minute,” she said sharply. “Were you just saying all that to get me to talk?”
“Could’ve been,” Lebkuchen said with an impish smile. She quickly pushed herself up to kiss Elise’s cheek, then laughed to herself.
Elise could feel her face turn scarlet. “Oh for goodness’ sake!” she huffed.
“This life is hard,” Lebkuchen said. “But I’m happy. Even when it’s hard, I’m happy just having you here with me.”
Elise sighed softly, lifting her gaze to the horizon as the last light began to fade. “Well I’m not,” she said quietly. “It’s hard, thankless work, and I’m sick of it. Barely enough to eat, no time for ourselves; it’s not what I wanted.” Lebkuchen hummed sadly, tilting her head back to look up at Elise. Elise smirked, seizing her chance and lunging forward and roughly pressing her lips against hers. Lebkuchen yelped in surprise, but quickly eased into the kiss, closing her eyes. As Elise pulled away, she added “And you still won’t stop teasing me!” as she poked at Lebkuchen’s sides.
“Ah! I’m sorry!” Lebkuchen laughed, trying to swat away her hands.
“I’m not letting you off that easy!” Elise declared.
“Elise, please stop!” she said, doubled over in hysterics as Elise tickled her sides.
“Are you going to stop teasing me like that?” Elise demanded, relenting in her assault.
“But if I do that, I won’t get to see Elise’s cute flustered face anymore,” Lebkuchen pouted. Elise’s fingers flew back on the assault. “No, alright! I promise!” she said, trying in vain to cover her sides.
“I don’t believe you,” Elise said gravely, “so you’ll have to make it up to me some other way.”
“Anything!” Lebkuchen said, her voice cracking.
Elise wrapped her arms around Lebkuchen’s waist, lowering her face and nuzzling against Lebkuchen’s neck. “You have to kiss me now,” she said.
“Letting me off easy, then?” Lebkuchen teased. Elise pulled back slightly as Lebkuchen twisted her body around to kiss her lips. Just as quickly, she seemed to pull away. “There,” Lebkuchen said.
“Too short,” Elise said, pulling her close. “Try again.”
“Someone’s demanding today,” Lebkuchen laughed, placing another gently kiss on her cheek.
“It’s hard to change who you are,” Elise said, kissing along Lebkuchen’s neck. “And as you know, I am very greedy.” Pulling Lebkuchen’s face to meet hers, Elise kissed her once more, deeply and forcefully. She’d made her choice. She would never be rich, but she was still that self-centered girl, chasing whatever she wanted without reservation. Though old desires still pulled at her, she would continue to push forward through this drudgery, for the love she wanted more than anything.