Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

When Vanilla asked Shadow for the favor to babysit Cream while she worked overtime, he did not hesitate to say yes. Cream was a nice girl and Vanilla had helped him out so many times in the past. It would have not been fair for him to not return the favor.

Vanilla was a single mother. She was a friend. Of course he would do it. 

So that was where he found himself now.

It was the first week of summer and Cream was happily building sandcastles on the beach. He sat on the ground next to her and watched as the waves crashed against the shore, listening idly to what she had to say. He hummed along in agreement when needed, nodded when he acknowledged that he was listening. 

Cheese was building his own sandcastle. A slightly bastardized version of Cream’s, but Shadow was not going to tell him that. He had manners. He was nice. 

Most of the time. To the outside, it would look like he was bored. But he was not bored. He just liked the peace.

He also hated sand. A lot. Coarse, rough and it got everywhere. Even inside his gloves. Yuck.

But he was not going to say that to Cream.

It was a rare day that he got to slow down. 

But the past three years have been slow too. 

Robotnik was in prison and GUN got their shit together and actually did their job, kind of. New president who knew what he was doing. Kind of. Sonic finally got some time off. Shadow still did the odd GUN mission or two—freelancer, he would call himself. Independent contractor. Not really.

The supervillain of the week eventually became the supervillain of the month, to the supervillain of the year. And finally, evil dwindled for the time being. 

The big city was finally in one piece. Robotnik was in prison for good. Life was peaceful.

It was good.

So he sat next to Cream as she built another tower to the sandcastle. Her little backpack sat next to him and was filled to the brim with seashells that he had helped collect. What she planned to do with them, he did not quite know. There was a method to the six year old’s madness, as the saying went. 

He glanced down at the inside of his right wrist, his watch lighting up to show him the time. 15:00 PM. Nowhere close to sundown. Sonic always teased him about the position of his watch, but it was the military habit that Shadow could not shake off. It was pretty practical. 

“Chao, chao!” 

Shadow looked over to see Cheese waving his arm to him to see. He built a tower for his castle. It was a lump of sand in the vague shape of the bucket. He looked so proud of it.

Shadow was blunt. He was kind of an asshole too. He was broody. And he did not deny it. He knew what he was. He was no faker.

But he was not going to be mean to a four year old Chao and say his sand castle looked like shit.

“Good job.” He managed to muster out. 

Cheese clapped.

Shadow’s heart felt a little lighter. 

Rouge

So, this is your life now? Hanging out with a six year old?

*Babysitting a six year old.

Honey, you’re twenty four.
We need to get you to the clubbbb.

I would prefer not to.

Shadow punched in the code for the apartment. 1991. Because Sonic never changed it from the default the moment they moved in. 

The outside light was one. So Sonic was home. 

He walked in to dim lights and the ceiling fan on. The blinds were closed. 

Sonic had a migraine.

“Hi babe.” The mumble was still audible enough. Surely enough, he was laying on the couch, blanket half covering him and him facing out and he absolutely looked like shit. 

“You have a migraine.”

“Bingo.”

Shadow went to the couch and lifted Sonic up. He moved the cushion from the floor, because of course Sonic never picked it up, to put it on his lap. He gently tugged Sonic to lay his head on top of it. 

“How long has it been going on?”

“Not long.”

“Are you sure?”

“Okay, very long...Four hours.” 

Shadow gently began to stroke his head. “You need to stop getting concussions.”

Sonic sighed. “I only got it once.”

“Per week.”

“You’re not funny.”

Shadow slightly smiled. Because he was obviously right. And that at least Sonic was still with some of his personality. 

“C’mere. Give me my smooch.”

Shadow leaned down and did so, very softly. 

“You can do better than that. Give me the real thing.”

Shadow did give him a proper kiss. He was still careful.

Sonic hummed. “Hi.”

“Hi.”

When he got really debilitated, let it be by his rapid, scattered attention span or extremely accelerated heartbeat, Sonic cried.

The migraines caused him great pain. He got similar attacks like Shadow as it was. But the accelerated heartbeat was scary enough. The medicine caused it too, but it was the only ones that worked. 

Now, did the lack of appetite help the side effects? Not at all.

But too many times, Sonic woke up in the middle of the night, out of breath and heartbeat racing. Horrified. There was no real treatment yet—gotta go fast was not a medical condition. But it was scary. 

Shadow tried his best every time.

“How was babysitting Cream?”

“It was...”

I nearly broke down crying the moment I left because she acted like Maria.

“Shadow?”

She reminded me of Maria. She laughed. And she smiled. And for a moment, it was like she was alive.

“It was fine.”

“That’s good.” Sonic turned to face him. “It’s nice of you to help Vanilla like this.”

“Just repaying the favor.”

“She doesn’t trust just anyone with Cream.”

“What do you mean?”

“Why do you think only we, Knuckles and Amy babysit Cream?”

“Because we’re the only adults?”

“Well, yes. But no. She trusts you.”

“I...thought it was because no one was available.”

“Nah. She trusts you.”

“Oh.” Shadow thought about it. “I didn’t think of it like that.”

“Yeah.” Sonic looked at him. “... Are you sure you’re okay?”

If there was one thing that Sonic was, it was honest. He wore his heart on his sleeve, as the saying went. He was purely truthful. And a bad liar, on the rare cases he tried. He bluffed with enemies. He spoke his mind openly. 

And he saw Shadow for who he was. He didn’t judge him. He didn’t lie to him. He never did.

“I’m fine.” Shadow tried to bluff and mean it. He tried to be convincing. But it was difficult when it came to the most honest being he knew. When it came to the most genuine soul he loved.

Sonic placed his hand on top of his chest. A simple gesture that spoke volumes with his former rival. Enemies, if Shadow wanted to be literal. I see you, for who you are. For what you try to say.

But Shadow wasn’t ready to talk about it just yet. 

“I’m fine.” Shadow repeated. “Just a little worn out. It was a long day.”

“Your eyes are red.”

Shadow didn’t get allergies. 

“It happened again. I...felt cold.”

“What caused it?”

I saw my sister again.

“Just old wounds. In here.” He gestured to his heart.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. I feel better.”

“That’s good.”

“What about you?”

“It...happened again. With my heart, too.”

“You need to really get that checked out.”

“No shit. But there is no other case like mine. I’m literally the fastest thing alive. The only one. It’s been like this since I was little. But I keep thinking about it. The... heartbeat issue didn’t start until three years ago. All that the doctors are gonna say are to take it slow. And I don’t do that. I can’t do that.”

“Well. You might have to change that habit, blue.”

“That’s scary.”

“I know...But we’ll get through it.”

“Totes.”

“We always do.”

“C’mon. Let’s go to bed. You need to sleep.”

“Alright.” Sonic slowly sat up, and didn’t complain when Shadow reached out to help him to do so. “Hey babe...carry me?”

Shadow sighed and did so.

Shadow had the habit of waiting for Sonic to be asleep before he went to sleep. It was inevitable. Today was particularly more important than usual, watching for any winces in his sleep or waking up in the middle of the night with a racing heartbeat.

Sonic had to take it easy. He has no other choice. He needed to rest. 

Shadow needed to take it easy too. 

But he couldn’t prevent his own racing thoughts. 

He tossed and turned until almost two in the morning. But he finally went to sleep.

Chapter Text

Shadow was part of multiple group chats. But he only really responded to 2 of them.

There was the main chat of Mis Nenas y Nenes 💖 formed by Vanilla. Translated to my girls and boys from Vanilla’s own native Argentinian Spanish, everyone was included. It served as the family chat where everything was appropriate because they did not want to ever embarass themselves to Vanilla.

And then there was the unhinged chat.

The Problematic Bachelors. Stylized as 🤪Problematic Bachelors🤪, it consisted of the adults with their respective emojis: 

• 💋Rouge, for her lipstick.
• 🌭Sonic, for the chili dogs.
• ☕Shadow, for the coffee affinity that he developed very quickly on the ARK. 
• 🦎Espio, for being a chameleon.
• 🐊 Vector, for being a crocodile.
• 💐 Amy, out of protest due to the rose emoji being red and not pink yet.
• 💎 Knuckles, for the Master Emerald. 
• 🪻Blaze, for her love of lilacs and lavender, and not liking the design of the crown emoji.
• 🥈Silver, for he liked the simplicity of it.

It was at Tails’s request to not be included; he did not want to see all the antics, like Rouge drunk texting at 2 in the morning. Sonic was relieved; he didn’t want Tails to see some of his so-called ‘unglamorous’ moments either. And boy, did he have so many.

Silver was technically the youngest adult, therefore earning his least favorite nickname; the child.

It was through this chat that Shadow learned a lot of things, including that Amy’s birth name was Amalia Rosales born to Colombian parents in Malibu, but she preferred to go by Amy Rose. But Vanilla still called her Amalia, and they gossiped in Spanish with Espio, who was born in Yucatan—who kept his chat name as Espió but used Espio in day-to-day life. 

Granted, Shadow had only been in the good graces of the squad—and in the Problematic Bachelors—chat for maybe four years or so. And he was still sort of reclusive. So…he was catching up on the lore. Slowly. And getting used to more social outings.

Like The Raspberrys concert. 

Marked by multiple situationships and a blend of multiple genres, they proved to be a quick favorite with the group. Shadow was a little hesitant at first to try new music; he was far more used to the 1940s and 1950s music that he had grown up with on the ARK. And continuously danced to at Maria’s request and to Gerald’s amusement. They received radio transmissions of different songs up until 1963; Do You Love Me by The Contours was an absolute favorite of Maria’s.

It was the first song that Shadow downloaded onto his phone when he finally got one of his own.

But The Raspberrys were local to Mobius City, with Vector and Espio claiming to have known the lead bassist and the lead singer since they shared half of their classes together in Year 12. Shadow did not believe it; until after the concert, when he got to meet the 4-man band and they heartily reunited with Vector and Espio.

The Raspberrys outdoor concert was one to die for. Perfect blend of the oldies, the goodies, and the newbies, as Vector stellarly reviewed it. They went in Vector’s pick up and somehow, they all fit. Vector was the driver and Espio was in the passenger seat. Amy sat on Rouge’s lap, Silver sat on Blaze’s. Shadow, who valued his personal space and appreciated that everyone else knew that, was in the middle. They probably broke a few traffic laws while doing that, both en-route and on the way back. 

Silver suggested riding out in the bed of the pickup, but Vector declined, saying eloquently; “No, dicknips, I’m not gonna deal with a concussion.” 

Now, they were all at Rouge and Shadow’s house in the backyard trying to light up the fire pit. It had rained the previous night and while the post-rain chill was felt in the air, the logs were still wet. They always would forget to cover the fire pit to save on lumber. Like idiots. 

Blaze and Rouge took a quick trip to the nearby super store to buy dry lumber and buy lighter fluid.

It was going to be a slight delay to light up the fire pit, but they would eventually figure it out soon enough. They had cold drinks to match the crisp autumn air around them and to contrast the cozy fire below. Better to party at the house rather than buy overpriced drinks at the venue bar. 

“Babe, remember in year nine when we all went camping for broadcast class?” Espio asked. “And the damn fire wouldn’t work with the matches?”

“Yes! Coach forgot the lighter fluid on campus.” Vector barked out a laugh.

At least, Shadow knew some of that lore; Sonic, Amy, Espio, Vector and Tails all went to the same K-12 school growing up. Vector and Espio, being three years ahead of Sonic and Amy, had graduated first but shared Broadcast Class with them both, where the announcements and campus news were more comedy than informing.

“Then how did you light it up?” Silver asked.

“We used Tommy’s deodorant,” Espio snickered. “Spray deodorant.” He motioned to chuck an invisible deodorant spray bottle into the struggling campfire like dunking a basketball. 

“What the hell?! That’s not safe!” Silver gasped.

“So don’t try it at home,” Vector said then leaned forward. And he and Amy said in unison;“Try it in the woods!” 

He burst out laughing and dapped up Amy who was laughing along with him. 

“Oh my god, wait!” Amy could barely speak with her laughter. “Wait, I think Sonic filmed it!” Amy exclaimed. “Let me check the Mega Collection. It should be labeled.” 

Ah, the Mega Collection. The ginormous shared album of antics, pictures and videos of their crew. Shadow was inaugurated into it after the second wave of the Eggman attacks, now that he had proven himself to be a true ally and—dare he say—a friend.

She pulled out her phone from her hoodie front pocket, her sparkly tarot themed phone case still glimmering in the limited light.

Shadow’s phone case was an industrial shatter-proof red. It was kind of boring.

But hey, it made it through everything so…if it ain’t broke…

But might as well, before the nightly antics began, he could begin to update the album with the concert pictures. Shadow pulled out his own phone and began doing so. The group chat was inactive as of 4 hours ago; the latest message was from Sonic (🌭Sonic: busy, i’ll catch up later, have fun at the concert!!!) 

Last he knew, Sonic was going out with Sally for their…one year anniversary. 

Or something like that.

Shadow didn’t press on it—he didn’t trust himself to keep silent about his feelings for Sonic. One look at him and Shadow melted. He kept his composure, most of the time.

He uploaded the 60 pictures quickly then locked his phone before he texted Sonic something very stupid. He wasn’t drunk. But he was a little reckless.

“Here’s the video!” Amy held out her phone to Silver. “The camera quality sucks, though.”

Shadow and Silver leaned over and watched it. Even through the blurry pixels, it was still clear enough to see Espio throw the deodorant bottle into the fire and there was a small explosion. Through the phone’s tinny speaker, Shadow could hear Sonic’s laughter.

“Guys! We got it!” Rouge announced from the back door. She held the starter fluid and Blaze held the dry lumber. “Let’s get lit all up in this bitch.”

The banter and the music on the bluetooth speaker was perfect. Amy was a little drunk, as was Rouge. Vector was a heavy weight. Espio didn’t drink. Shadow had a beer that he was barely halfway through and that was it. Silver and Blaze were under a blanket and a little drunk respectively. 

“The concert was great, honestly. They haven’t been this good since their first tour. And I stand by that,” Vector said. 

“Sucks that Sonic couldn’t come,” Amy sighed. 

“Why couldn’t he?” Rouge asked. “I forgot to ask earlier.”

“Because of the usual,” Amy said. Then she rolled her eyes. “The delightful Princess Sally Acorn.”

“Oh,” Blaze said with a blink. She wanted to say something, but merely sipped at her drink quietly.

Right. Sally. 

“Well, so long as he’s happy,” Shadow said, a little numb and took another swig from his beer.

Silence. 

“Brother, are you high?” Espio asked. “Sonic is miserable with her!”

Shadow ws startled. “I—thought you all liked Sally.”

Various exclaims of denial—“Absolutely not!”, “EW!”, “I am offended at this allegation!”, “Are you high?!”—went around the fire pit all at once. 

Did he—miss anything?

“Did I miss something in the groupchat?”

“No. Well—” Rouge paused. “You’re not chronically online like we all are. Your email and group chats are your social media.” 

“That doesn’t answer my question,” Shadow said flatly. 

“Okay. Okay. So, the thing about Sally—” Amy paused. “Sally…She’s not a bad person. But she’s a terrible girlfriend. But you need to remember that Sonic sees the best in everyone. Of course he will never speak negatively about her…But I am not Sonic. I don’t like her.” Amy took a sip of her margarita. “I never did. Known her since year 10 and I absolutely detested her. We shared almost every class together! I wanted to die. Mathematics was the only break I had from her! I believe in women’s rights, but some of them don’t actually deserve it.”

“Ames!” Silver gasped.

“What, I said what I said! She talked shit about Vanilla being a single mom!”

“Wait WHAT?! When did she do that?!” Rouge exclaimed. 

“I thought I told you! I almost killed her!”

“No, bitch, you never fucking did! When the fuck was this?!”

“Literally the day after Cream’s second birthday party. Me and Sally met up for brunch. And she said that Vanilla should have known better. Nevermind that Cream’s dad is a fucking asshole and doesn’t deserve to see the light of day!”

“...Wow. Wow. I…absolutely can believe it,” Blaze said. “I can. No one really tends to hang out with her outside the diplomatic circles. But I will say that she wasn’t like this before. She was a sweetheart…a long time ago.”

“I get that she’s under a lot of pressure, she’s a monarch. It’s not easy being a—hero. I know she’s under a lot of stress—and pressure—but motherfucker, so are we!” Amy cursed out loud. “Shit! So are we! Maybe I keep seeing her on the bad days. I know nothing’s the same after the third wave, but…I don’t like her for Sonic.”

“Amy, it’s pure elitism,” Vector said. “It’s because we’re democratic plebs. Our delightful neighbors in the Kingdom of Alcorn are a little too high on their horse for us lowly democratic Mobians. Ain’t that right, babe?” He turned to Espio, who nodded earnestly. 

“We’ve done a few cases over there…They are absolute assholes. I prefer Soleanna. It was better when we were younger.”

“She was already on thin ice for being a monarch, but after the comment about Vanilla? Ice is shattered. Melted. Shadow, do you seriously not hang around her?” Amy asked. 

“Uh, I tend to avoid her outside of missions,” Shadow said. Though he rarely spoke to her, he couldn’t stand Sally’s energy. Something about her did not make sense. Maybe it was her fighting style and leadership when in a crisis; authoritative and aggressive, scattered and angry. One time, she did snap at him, and he snapped back about her audacity to the point Sonic had to step in.

Bygones be bygones.

“You’re not missing anything delightful. Her birth chart was atrocious,” Amy said.  “Tails hates Sally, and Tails rarely hates anyone.”

“He hates me,” Shadow said. 

“No, he misunderstands you,” Amy corrected. “Give him time to come around. He tends to hold onto grudges.”

He’s held onto it for five years and counting. 

But Shadow kept the comment to himself. 

Espio brought out the lighter and the box of cigs. “Smoke?” He offered. 

“Hell yeah brother,” Rouge said and held her hand out. Espio handed the lighter to her, knowing she had her style for it.

“Those are bad for you.” Vector sighed. 

“Social occasions,” Espio corrected. “Not like all those energy drinks you inhale are any better. Or all those cheves you’re collecting.”

“Your turn driving, sweetheart.”

“Ay, Corazon,” Espio said with an eye roll. “You’re stupid.”

Rouge passed both items to Shadow and he wordlessly took a cigarette. With practiced ease, lit it up and took a deep breath. 

The first hit always felt so fucking good.

Yes, he knew it was bad for him. Yes, he knew it was nasty. But he deserved to be reckless, at least a little bit. As a treat.

“Let me try,” Silver said, a little drunk already.

“Are you sure?” Shadow asked cautiously. 

“Yeah, why not?” Silver asked. “I’m drunk. Might as well, since I’m here.” 

“Don’t think this is peer pressure just because we’re all smoking.”

“Nope,” Silver said with a shake of his head. “It’s curiosity. And what’s that shit that Sonic always says—”

“Gotta go fast?” Rouge piped in. “Long time no see? Speed is my middle name? All right, now we’re talking? I told you so? Here we go?”

“How the hell did you remember all that?”

“Ears of a bat.”

“Well, none of the above,” Silver said. “Oh, I remember! Fuck it, we ball.”

“He doesn’t even play basketball,” Espio said offhandedly. 

“Silv. Are you sure?” Shadow asked again.

“Yeah,” Silver said with a smile. “I want to try.” 

“Okay. I’m gonna light it up and when it’s burning, you take a slow inhale,” Shadow tentatively instructed. “Hold it for a few seconds. Then you take it out of your mouth and let it go.”

“Shades, I can do this,” Silver reassured. “I mean it! Light me up.”

Shadow sighed. Nodded. Relented.

Silver held the cigarette between his fingers and at the same time, Shadow flicked the lighter and watched Silver follow the instructions he gave him.

And Silver absolutely failed. He took the breath too fast and began to cough aggressively. 

Everyone started laughing. 

Shadow knew that Silver could not do it.

“All good?”

“Okay. Yeah, that was disgusting. Not for me,” Silver said after clearing his throat. He shuddered. “Do I flick it into the fire—”

“NO!” Everyone exclaimed almost unanimously. 

“Hand it over!” Amy held her hand out. Silver carefully passed it to her. “Thank you, child. But anyways, I am not a fan of Sally,” Amy concluded. “And neither are most of us.”

“I mean. So long as Sonic is happy.”

“Trust me, brother,”Espio said with a drag. “He’s not. He’s only happy when he’s with you.”

Shadow blanked. 

Espio looked at him, completely serious. “Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about.”

“Uh—”

“Oh, Shadow. We know.”

“Those who know…” Silver muttered with a laugh. 

“How long have Sally and Sonic been together, anyway?” Vector asked.

“On and off, but as of Sonic’s messages, a year,” Amy stated. “A year of him trying and her being ungrateful.”

Shadow’s phone buzzed and he quickly pulled it from his jacket to see the notification from his direct messages with Sonic. 

🌭 Sonic

Are you still at the concert?

No, I’m at the house with everyone else.

Oh okay.
Can I come over?

Of course.

Is everything okay?

Not really haha. 
Sally broke up with me.

Oh.

I had no idea. Are you okay?

That is yet to be determined.
I’ll be there in a sec. I’ll meet you in the front.

And his heart stopped in his throat. 

“Uh, I’ll be right back.”

“Where are you going?”

“To—talk with Sonic.”

Shadow sped off before the rest of them could start gossiping at his expense.

He quickly went inside and let Sonic in. And Sonic looked…sad. He wore his University of Mobius hoodie under a thick jacket and some jeans.

“Hey.”

“Hey. Come in. Do you want to talk about it?”

“I—Yes.”

“Was it mutual?”

“No. Yes. I don’t know. I’m tired. I didn’t know who else to call. Everyone would have said I told you so. Not in the mood to be told that. And I know you would tell me I told you so, but…I figured you’d get it.”

“Right.”

“Sorry to barge in,” Sonic said. Suddenly self conscious. “I’ll—” 

Shadow immediately reached out to hold him by the sleeve. 

“Stay.”

There was silence except for the heat conditioning unit humming in the vents. 

“Please.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. Don’t go,” Shadow said. “Talk to me.”

“I don’t know what to say…”

“Anything.”

“I don’t know. Because everything—everything I say is the wrong thing.”

“Sonic, what are you talking about?”

“I fucked up. With Sally. I thought—I thought it was fine. I thought everything was fine.”

“Do you want to walk for a while?”

Sonic exhaled. Then nodded.

“Yeah.”

Shadow shot a quick direct message to Rouge (☕Shadow: gonna walk w sonic to take a breather, don’t wait up). He caught up to Sonic and they both walked down the cold street. Distantly, Shadow could hear the echoes of the boombox outside.

Sonic looked exhausted.

“What happened?”

“I went to take her to dinner. And instead, she just sits me down and says it’s time for us to go our separate ways. I already had a horrible feeling about it. I thought it was just nervousness, but then…she started talking about how I never say the right things. And I’m not the right person. I asked if there was someone else. She didn’t really give me an answer. So I just said ‘Okay.’ Picked up my things and left. I didn’t even try to fight it. I never said the right things.”

“Even if you said the wrong things…the right people will still stick by you.”

“I don’t believe that. I wasn’t enough for her to stay. I wasn’t enough for her at all…”

“Hey. Don’t say that.”

“I have to be perfect. I have to be—” Sonic’s voice cracked. “I have to be a hero. I have to be a good example. And I’m tired of being a good example! I want to make mistakes! I want to fuck around and find out! I’ve been so reckless and careful and spent over a decade saving the world and I’m so sick of it. She said we weren’t a good match. That I wasn’t the same as before. And honestly, she isn’t either. I don’t get what she’s talking about. You’re the only one who knows.”

“I won’t tell. And I’m…sorry. That sucks.”

They found a distant curb off the cul de sac where the house was for rent and sat down. 
 
Shadow’s phone began buzzing and he dug through it in his pockets. Only for the cigarette pack and lighter to spill out into the ground instead. 

“Uh…That’s not mine.”

“Cigarettes?” Sonic asked flatly. “Really?”

“It’s Espio’s. Technically. I prefer the cherry and strawberry flavors.”

Sonic let out a dry laugh and picked them up from the ground. 

A quick glance down at the phone showed a notification of the updated weather. It dropped down from 49 degrees to 43. Relieved that it wasn’t anyone messaging him or being nosey, Shadow put the phone away. 

He loved this weather. He loved being out here. He loved talking with Sonic.

But truthfully? Shadow just loved Sonic so much it hurt. 

“You know, those are bad for you,” Sonic said. 

“I know.”

Prepared to take the pack from him and change the subject, he did not expect for Sonic to take a cigarette out of the box, hold it in his mouth and flick the lighter on with one hand. It was so fast. So easy. Too perfect to not have been the first time.

Sonic exhaled the smoke into the cold air with the same look of guilty relief that Shadow knew mirrored his own when he was having a cigarette after a long, stressful day.

Sonic turned to look at him. “What?” He asked. 

“Since when do you know how to smoke?”

“Oh,” Sonic laughed. “For a while now.”

“Well, I’ll be damned. I didn’t expect that.”

“Guess you’re not the only one with bad habits.”

Shadow chuckled and pulled out his own cigarette. “So…I guess you don’t mind?” 

“By all means.”

Shadow lit it up. He felt Sonic’s gaze on him the entire time. “Y’know, I tried to teach Silv how to smoke earlier,” he began to hopefully change the subject. 

“How did that go?”

“Horribly. The child fumbled the cigarette. He breathed in too fast and started coughing on his own spit.” Shadow felt his heart skip as Sonic laughed. “He was about to throw it into the fire pit but Amy snatched it from him…When did you start?”

“I went to a few parties in my first year of college…okay, a lot of parties. I didn’t have my first cigarette until I was nineteen. It was a phase. You hadn’t enrolled yet. Don’t tell Tails.”

“I won’t.”

“But I mean, I was already familiar with it. Tamau smoked.”

“Who is Tamau?”

“My dad.”

That was the first time Sonic had ever mentioned his father. Over a decade of fighting Sonic, bantering, arguing, laughing and now, for the first time, while smoking…Sonic mentioned his father.

“I…didn’t know you called your father by his name.”

“No, wait, wait, tamau wasn’t his name. His actual name was Karau. It’s different from saying ‘tama’; that means father, by itself. It’s what I would call him when I talked to him. But in this context, I’m talking about my father. Therefore, tamau.”

“I’m afraid I don’t follow.”

“Shadow, I’m not American.”

“Wait what?”

“I wasn’t born here,” Sonic said with a chuckle. “I’m from Kiribati.”

The location was not known to Shadow. “Where is that?”

“Really far from here. Okay, for context; do you know where Hawai’i is?

“Yes.”

“It’s practically directly southward from there. I wasn’t born in Mobius City. I was born in the village of Tabwakea, in Kiritimati, an island part of the Republic of Kiribati. Britain—Buriten—had colonized the name to Christmas Island for Kiritimati, but I refuse to call it Christmas Island. ”

“Oh. I didn’t know at all.”

“Really? You didn’t know?”

“You never really mentioned it.”

“Okay, true,” Sonic laughed. “In your defense, I never really brought it up. It’s just something all of us know. But, yeah, I am i-Kiribati.”

“Wow. I thought you were American.”

“Nope! Fifth generation i-Kiribati, baby. I’m the first one ever to leave the islands, actually.” Sonic held out the cigarette for him to hold as he dug through his pockets. “Hang on, I have it on my extra home screen.” He inputted his passcode. It clicked open. “I keep a weather widget of Kiritimati on my home screen all the time. It is currently…63 degrees.”

“They use fahrenheit?”

“Nah, I just got used to it.” With a couple of taps, Sonic located the picture. “Here it is!” He showed Shadow his phone. Surely enough, it was a very tiny island. So tiny. Surrounded by a beautiful, bright teal seashore.

“That’s my home!” Sonic smiled. “I speak Kiribati fluently with tama’s dialect that I grew up with. I never forgot the language. I knew some English before I came to Mobius. Now, I know it too much. I know it too well. So well that no one can tell I’m not from here. I mean, I don’t necessarily mind but…I never really feel like a true Mobian.”

And Sonic did have a perfect accent. No one would have noticed he wasn’t born in Mobius until he mentioned it. But Shadow could hear the difference in tone of voice when he spoke in his mother tongue; comfortable.

Shadow’s own had been described as transatlantic. Growing up with the 1950s movies in English, he picked it up immediately. 

Maria’s own unique slight accent from having a Peruvian-born mother and aunt, who was rarely around but still taught her some Spanish. Some Quechua words from her neighbors. She spent the first four years of her life in Lima before moving to the United States with Gerald. 

He learned some in return; naturally, the first thing Maria taught him were the curses. To Dr. Robotnik’s chagrin and disapproval. 

Transatlantic was what Rouge described his accent as, more lighter than the ones from the movies they watched. Though he was nowhere close to the radio announcers that Maria loved imitating.

“So, tamau was a marine biologist and studied fishes. It was just me and him. I spent it every day outside. The stars look a lot different than the ones here. Everything was peaceful until I turned seven. It was paradise, man. Lagoons, the sea, the ocean. Fishing. So many crabs,” Sonic let out a laugh. “I actually had a pet hermit crab named Banana, after the village I found it in. It was a great time. It’s why I love the outdoors so much. Just running and running, learning how to climb, storytelling…we played football so much. Oh, my bad.” Sonic formed air quotes. “Soccer.”

“Why did you leave?”

“I was pushed out. At first, tamau heard rumors about the Amerikan and Buritan armies making a deal with the mayor of Kiritimati for consultations of the bio-chemical weapons…whatever the fuck. I don’t remember exactly what. They were rumors. I was seven. Me and my friends weren’t quite sure what they meant. We didn’t even know what the word nuclear actually meant at all. I didn’t know the name until I mentioned the project to Rouge a few years ago. She did some digging where she could. So much of it is still classified, but there’s a name to the disaster; Operation Grapple and Operation Dominic…Operations Bullshit if you ask me.”

Sonic sighed. Took a long drag of the cigarette.

“Rumors were true. It was my first ever encounter with Amerikan and Buritan militaries. I hated those assholes so fucking much,” Sonic said. “I still do. I would always get in trouble for fighting them. I would throw rotten coconuts at them all the time. Throw sand at their eyes. Anything I could do. One friend of mine got paint and flung it off the roof on top of a soldier. The stains on the building never went away. I would yell curses at them so much that they thought they were my real name. But mostly, it was just…this is not your land. Te raoi n te na toke. We said it over and over to the soldiers. Trying to get them out from harming our home. As if they were going to listen to a bunch of seven year old children.”

“Five months into their invasion, they began to test nuclear weapons and did not evacuate anyone or warn anyone. Not because they wanted to keep us there; but they just didn’t care about our well-being. We suspected that the radiation from a ‘small’ test actually made my friend get sick and die. She didn’t stand a chance. We were debating on leaving…but it was the stupid bomb that did it. We had a close call when I was fishing in a boat with my dad. An underwater sonar bomb went off. My dad hung onto the sail on time. But the impact of it threw me off the boat. I couldn’t swim. After that, my dad decided he was going to get me out as soon as possible. A handful of my friends and their families had already left for Oahu. Some to Australia. I was the last one left.”

“How old were you when you left Kiritabi?”

“Eight.”

Shadow blinked in surprise. 

“Alone?”

“No. Tamau stayed behind to help with recovery efforts. But he sent me out with his best friend, Emil. He…said he was going to find me again. Promised me. He got us on a commercial ship Northward to Hawaiʻi.”

“Did he catch up?”

“Nope.” 

“I’m sorry.”

“It is…what it sadly is. It was the last I heard from him. But Emil was an angel. Sweetest badger in the entire universe. We made it to Kauaʻi and lived there for two years. He helped me make the best of it. I loved it so much,” Sonic said. “I went to school. And Shads, I kicked ass at linguistics! I fucking carried that Linguistic Team against Honolulu Prep to GOLD in the Verbal Olympics! FIVE TIMES!

“I’m advanced in Māori and in Samoan and super advanced in Hawaiian. My maths teacher taught me Malay. Emil taught me Portuguese. My science teacher and Linguistics Coach—actually, you might know her, her name is Marim Khavari—taught me Farsi!”

Shadow was about to comment that even though he was with the government, he didn’t know everyone, but the name rang a bell. “That sounds very familiar.”

“She became a new assistant director for the U.N. a few weeks ago. It was all over the news. We still talk in Farsi... I’m still not that good at writing it,” Sonic admitted sheepishly. “Anyways, Spanish was surprisingly easy to learn with the Portuguese teaching. English was super easy for us because we all spoke it in class, duh. So in total, to brag, I know nine languages.”

“I see you. Wannabe Espio,” Shadow teased. An inside joke after Espio and Sonic showed up in the same costume to a Halloween party as Indiana Jones.

“Listen motherfucker, Espio wanna be me!”

“Sure thing.”

“Y’know what?! Whatever! It just shows it’s possible! He’s actually learning Kiribati. At Mobi Academy, we had a class presentation in Year 8 about our homeland. Naturally, I chose Kiribati. He chose Yucatán, in México. Vector chose Florida and we could not stop laughing at all the Florida Man jokes he put on the presentation.”

I lived with my dad’s best friend, Emil, for a while and saved up to go book passage to the mainland…Sadly, Emil passed away after we arrived. Brain embolism. He was more exposed to the military bases than me, but I was immune because of…this weird power in me. Doctor said it was a result of a head injury. But I don’t know.”

I still want to learn more languages. There’s this phrase; E aki tau ti teaina te newe. One language is never enough. I know it’s possible; Espio is fluent in seventeen languages. He’s learning Kiribati too and practices with me a lot. I arrived here when I was…twelve? Enrolled into K-12 Mobius Academy. Had a dorm. Joined Broadcast and met everyone else,” Sonic said with a bright grin. “Adopted Tails when I was thirteen. And the rest, as they say, is history. Remember after the third wave when all of us went to the Capitol for the UN Ball?”

“And we tied in the race?”

“Where I won, yes.”

“I will choose to disagree, but yes, I do,” Shadow said with a nod. “What about it?”

“I ditched the ball because I refused to shake the President’s hand. And the British Prime Minister’s hand. Those motherfuckers were not innocent; they were part of both operations. Rouge did some digging for me, and I was not happy. I already distrusted the executive American government with them not really giving a shit about the oil spills in the Gulf. But that was my absolute breaking point.”

“I keep a distance from the Capitol too.” 

“I was ready to spit on them, but Tails stopped me because he didn’t want me to get in trouble with the witnesses. He didn’t know about the ops yet at the time. There wasn’t an easy way to tell him about it when he was still so little. But I needed to give those bastards a piece of my mind. So, I did.”

“How?”

“Unfortunately, not by spitting at them. The PM and the President were thanking me; I told them to go fuck themselves. I refused to shake their hands. Imagine their shock when they found out that their precious heroic All-American Mobian blue blur is actually a born and raised proud Kiribati island boy from the country they damaged with their nuclear weaponry. I didn’t give a fuck. I told them that they would go to hell and burn in it for what they did to Kiribati. And I left.”

That earned Shadow so much respect that he did not know what to say.

“God, I was pissed that night. I skipped the ball. I was too angry. The press wasn’t in the Oval Office, thankfully, or else I would be more villainized in the tabloids than I already am.”

Shadow had not gone to the ball. He walked around the city instead. But he remembered Sonic meeting him outside the Supreme Court in the misting almost-rain then challenging him immediately to a race. Shadow accepted the challenge. It was a tie. 

“It got better, though. As Emil taught me, I made the best of it. I met some Kiribati diplomats a week after and became great friends with them. Through them, I made more Kiribati friends that immigrated here. We have a group chat. Only about four of us, but it really does help to just…yap in your native language. We all play online pretty often. Tails just hears me yelling in aggressive Kiribati in my room on the headset and he knows it’s game night.”

“Have you thought about going back to visit home?”

Sonic stubbed the butt of the cigarette out. Picked up another one from the pack and lit it. This time, he took a drag and then passed it to Shadow. 

This was so…intimate. 

Thankful that the cold air could be the blame of his blush, he accepted it and took a much needed drag.

“...Once or twice.” Sonic remained quiet for more moments. “There were recovery efforts after the United Nations stepped in and intervened, and my friends have said it is a lot better now, but…I don’t know. The diplomats said I was welcome anytime and they helped me get my passport back. I just know it won’t be the same. I don’t think I’m ready, or that I’ll ever be. But the facts are facts; I’m an island boy. I’m i-Kiribati and proud of it. I love speaking so many languages. I love speaking my language and teaching it. It keeps my heart alive. Mobius is so diverse here, and I can spend hours just chatting and gossiping with everyone.”

“Can I learn a few words?”

“Really?!”

“Yes. In return, I can teach you some Peruvian Spanish.”

“You know Peruvian Spanish?!”

“In your defense, I never really brought it up.” Shadow mirrored his words from earlier, but smiled. 

“Heh, true.”

“Maria was half Peruvian.” The name felt heavy in the air and Shadow did not miss Sonic’s surprise. “She was born in Lima to a Peruvian mother and lived there for four years until Sara—her mother—passed away. Then she moved to the United States to live with Dr. Robotnik and her maternal aunt, before she got sick. On the ARK, he taught us multiple languages too, including Peruvian Spanish. Maria’s strongest ones were English, French, Latin and Peruvian Spanish. I can understand French, and my Latin is rusty. But I know Peruvian Spanish really well, thanks to her and thanks to speaking to her Tia.”

“Wow. That’s awesome,” Sonic said with a smile. “That’s really awesome.”

“Maria taught me the curses first.”

Sonic laughed. “Espio did too! Amy’s Colombian Spanish is so pretty. But I don’t think I’ll ever ask Vanilla for Argentinian curses. Now that—that’s off limits.”

“I agree.” There was a beat. “So…what are some Kiribati words?”

“Oh yeah! Well, hello is easy; Mauri. Very simple. And then there’s kaain ia ngke; where are you from? Antai aram; what is your name? Ko uara; how are you? Ko’raba is thank you. Marawa is ocean. Nakomai; come here.” Sonic started to laugh and held up the cigarette. “Tikareti; cigarette. And then there’s…” His voice grew softer. “Tikiaroi.”

“What does that mean?”

Sonic looked at him. “Beautiful.”

“And my favorite; ituai man nonooriko n taai aikai.”

“What does that mean?”

“Long time no see.”

“Do you miss it?”

“Always….Uh! We shouldn’t do this again.”

Shadow froze. “Talk?” 

“No! Not at all! I love talking with you. I meant smoking! It’s so bad for you!” Sonic laughed. “I love talking with you.”

“Well, yes. But…one bad habit. Just for now.”

“Okay. It’s not perfect, but okay.” Sonic stubbed their third cigarette—how the fuck did it get to three—onto the ground put kept it in his hand to throw away. “Realistically, it’s going to happen again, isn’t it?”

“Probably.” 

Silence passed. “So, we should head back. Get something warm. Because it’s cold as fuck.” Sonic stood up and held his hand out to Shadow to help him up. 

“Agreed.” Shadow paused. “Race you?”

Sonic winked. “You know it.”

Shadow was about to start the countdown, then—

“1—2—SIKE!” And in a blink, Sonic sped off.

Fucker.

Eventually, they returned to the house and stayed inside Shadow’s room to warm up. Coffee—at almost one in the morning—was brewed and heated up. Rouge was in her room downstairs.

They kept talking. From what the group chat said, Espio and Vector were headed home to pick up Charmy in the morning for hockey practice. Silver and Blaze tagged along as did Amy. The truck had a legal number of passengers and a designated driver for the night. 

It felt so easy. It felt so natural. 

He felt some form of emptiness when they both went to sleep.

Shadow couldn’t sleep. Too conflicted about his feelings for Sonic, now that he was single. He tossed and turned. He felt the dwindling hope of possibility in his heart, one that he long since buried since the moment he realized he loved the blue blur.

He was no stranger to restless sleep.

But it was an unwelcome friend regardless.

Unknown to Shadow, Sonic tossed and turned on the couch too. Not from the lack of comfort, nor the jitters from the nicotine, but at the fact that he had more fun and felt more joy with Shadow in one night than he ever did in the year long relationship with Sally. 

He wasn’t sure how to feel about it.

🤪 Problematic Bachelors 🤪

🪻 Blaze: @sonic Are you okay? I just heard that Sally’s engaged.
🌭 Sonic: I’m fine. We broke up. She dumped me at 10:15pm and got engaged at 11. 
💎 Knuckles: Dude…
🌭 Sonic: My condolences to whoever made the mistake to marry her. That’s all I say about it.

Chapter Text

Now, in the present, the next day, Sonic woke up a lot better and happier. Shadow needed to head out early to watch Cream. But his mood was lighter, knowing that Sonic felt better and that he could smile without being in pain. Relief. Pure relief. He didn’t fall asleep until Sonic did. And even then, Shadow slept like shit.

Four hours of sleep later, he woke up to lively, much welcomed noise in the kitchen.

The coffee was brewed and smelled delicious.

He arrived at Vanilla’s house fifteen minutes before she had to leave. Cream was eating breakfast on her booster seat with Cheese in the high chair next to her.

“Shadow! Hello!” Vanilla greeted him with a very warm hug.

“Good morning.” He patted Vanilla’s back when she hugged him. He was still getting used to it.

“Hi Shadow!” Cream got out of her booster chair and ran to hug him in greeting. 

He was startled, two hugs in a row were new for him. But he slightly hugged her in return. He didn’t know his strength limits just yet and the little one was so delicate that he didn’t want to hurt her. She had two matching scrunchies on each of her ears. It was very cute.

“Hey.” He gently patted her head. 

“I want to show you something!” Cream held his hand and guided him to the other side of the kitchen in the door frame.

“What is it?”

“I grew!” She pointed to the inked notches on the wall with measuring tape attached to the wall and surely enough, there was another mark a few centimeters above the previous one. They were all spaced out since she was one year old. 

Just like the one on the ARK station. Shadow grew a few centimeters. Maria was quite tall for her age. But with Gerald’s height, it made complete sense.

But on the ARK, the wall was marked with three different colors; red for himself, blue for Maria and bright green for Dr. Robotnik. The green always remained in place. Red kind of grew. Blue kept going upwards.

“That’s great.” Shadow struggled to say to her. Right. He had to monitor his tone. That’s what his education taught him. He wasn’t quite awake just yet. Coffee took a while to work on him. It was why Espio always suggested energy drinks when they had to pull all nighters or all dayers for cases and missions. Most of the time, Shadow accepted. It depended what kind of mood he was in.

“Let’s put your height.” Cream turned around and let go of his hand. “Mami, where is the marker?!”

Shadow hesitated to object and tell her it was no big deal and that she did not have to. He wasn’t going to grow anymore. But…method to the madness, he supposed.

She was social and this allowed for her to learn numbers, measurements and heights. This was important.

At least, that is according to the educational textbooks he tried to catch up on during his spare time. It helped that the University of Mobius was tuition free. U of M, as everyone called it. Or as Sonic called it “UMMMMM—” 

No one in the public eye knew he was in school to become a teacher. He did not announce it. He supposed his schoolhouse classroom in the future would be enough.

So, Shadow carefully marked his height above hers. He did not quite have the heart to tell her it was not going to change.

“C’mon!” She led him to the table. Vanilla shortly followed and handed Shadow his coffee in a neon pink mug. It felt like a good day already.

Cream held his hand as they walked through Station Square together. It was a regular day for the city, the early morning breeze still waking the people up to get the day started. Some businesses were still closed. Some were open. 

Cheese was strapped to Shadow’s chest in the tiny chao carrier. He was still asleep. Cream had wanted to originally bring the stroller for him; but Shadow reminded her that she would have to carry it. 

So she didn’t.

Now, he had to carry the sleeping chao around. The little thing was not quite a pet, but not quite a being. A companion is what Sonic called him. 

Companion, Shadow thought to himself as he felt a little bit of drool on his chest. Sure thing.

Cream was a nice kid. Energetic and calm. He walked steadily; she skipped happily.

This babysitting gig wasn’t so bad.

Exactly five months prior to the day, Silver got a concussion.

Sonic had stayed up playing video games on the switch. It wasn’t often that he could do that between classes and homework. He sat on the floor on the beanbag chair, while Shadow sat on the couch under a small fleece blanket. For the first time in days, he left his textbook on his desk.

Sonic was playing with his Kiribati friends with the one ear headset, with his native language flowing easily between laughter and conversation as they all played the game together. While Shadow did not understand all of it, he got the idea with some borrowed English words that occasionally popped up. 

Shadow loved it. 

Next to him on the couch, his phone buzzed. 

Huh. 

It was pretty late.

🤪 Problematic Bachelors 🤪
01:20 am

🪻Blaze: So, no one panic. But Silver is in the emergency room right now.
💐 Amy: QUE
🦎 Espió: what happened?!
💋 Rouge: What the fuck??
☕ Shadow: ??
🪻 Blaze: Oh wow, everyone’s awake 😂 Very long story but to sum it up, he fell off the attic ladder and hit his head really hard.

Shadow sat up and nudged Sonic’s head gently. “Babe,” he said. “Silv is in the hospital.”

Sonic nearly dropped his controller. He spoke quickly into the microphone some words in Kiribati and paused his game. He pressed a button to mute himself, removed his headset and dropped it into the rug.

He quickly sat up onto the couch.

“What happened?!”

Shadow showed the phone to Sonic. “He fell off a ladder.”

🦎 Espió: Holy fucking shit. I completely believe it. 
🪻 Blaze: He went to the attic to grab a suitcase for my trip tomorrow. I told him to be careful when he was coming down after turning off the lightbulb, but it must have been opposite day 🙄 “Oh babe, I’ll be fine! I don’t need help! I can skip two rungs on the ladder!” He said. I told him to be careful. And now?? LOOK WHERE WE ARE
🪻Blaze: I’m sorry, I haven’t slept for more than two hours in three days for prepping for this stupid Soleanna trip tomorrow. I’m so tired. Nurse suspects it’s a concussion.
☕ Shadow: What concussion grade?
🪻 Blaze: No idea yet. 
🪻 Blaze: 🖼️📎

The image was of Silver with two ice packs on his head. He looked miserable. 

Sonic grimaced in response. 

“Well, shit. Guess we’re not going paintballing anytime soon,” Sonic said.

“No kidding,” Shadow replied, exiting the picture and going back to the chat. “From what Blaze says, it might be a concussion. Attics are maybe ten feet up in the air.”

Sonic sighed. “Oh Silvy…He’s going to be miserable for a while.”

“Yeah.”

Shadow’s phone buzzed again. 

“What if we go over and help them out while Blaze is gone?” Shadow asked. “We’re kind of experts at this now. Are you okay with that?”

“Yeah, totally!”

🪻 Blaze: They’re going to do a CT scan soon to rule out any more severe injuries. 
💐 Amy: 😞
🐊 Vector: bonk
🐊 Vector: sorry i had to
🪻 Blaze: Don’t worry, I said the same thing to him to try to cheer him up.
🪻 Blaze: He cried harder.
🪻 Blaze: Not my proudest moment 🙃 
☕ Shadow: Me and Sonic can stay with Silver while you’re on your trip.
🪻 Blaze: Thank you 🥺🥺🥺🥺 I will keep everyone posted. I sent Vanilla a message too, so she knows. @shadow I’ll call you when we’re on our way home. Who knows what time that will be?
☕ Shadow: Understood.

07:10 am

🪻Blaze: Finally home 😮‍💨
🦎Espió: Verdict?
🪻Blaze: Grade 2 concussion.
💎Knuckles: WHAT THE FUCK DID I MISS
🐊Vector: bro missed everything 💀
🪻Blaze: No brain bleed thankfully. Recovery time should take about 2 to 3 weeks. No lights, screens, strenuous activities. He’ll be miserable for a while. It doesn’t help that he gets severe migraines already…Right now, he’s sleeping and probably will be for a while. I leave for Soleanna in three hours. I don’t want to leave Silvs ): Shadow is here though. He helped me pack and I'm at the embassy now. I don't want to do this. 
☕Shadow: I know. But you got this, Princess. It will be okay.
☕Shadow: We'll hold down the fort.

Blaze had half carried a dozing Silver to the entrance before Shadow took over. She punched in the apartment code and held the door open and led Shadow to their bedroom to let Silver sleep.  

Shadow half dozed on the desk chair and half played on his phone and caught up on some videos he had been meaning to watch. As instructed by the discharge papers, he woke up Silver every three hours to check on him and make sure he was okay. 

Around 11, he woke him up and Silver finally seemed to recognize that Shadow was there with him and not a dream like he had initially mumbled.

“Hey.”

“Hey.” Silver’s voice was painful. 

“How are you feeling?”

“Like shit.”

“Yeah, I imagine.” Shadow pulled the stool next to Silver’s bed and sat down. He reached for Silver’s hand and squeezed it in greeting, in lieu of flicking him on the forehead or shoving at his head as he usually did.

Shadow had a feeling that would not be welcome.

“My head hurts.”

“Obviously. You have a concussion. I would be more worried if it didn’t hurt.” 

“Can you get me one of the squeeze ice packs? It’s over on my desk. I would summon it but...ouchie.” Silver pointed in the wrong direction, but Shadow did not correct him on it.

“Sure.”

“You just gotta squeeze it.”

“Alright.” Shadow carefully squeezed it and with a light pop, the material quickly began freezing over. He placed them on Silver’s head on the side of the impact and held it there.

“It hurts so fucking much.”

“I know.”

“I can’t do this,” Silver said weakly. A tear down his temple. “It hurts so much.”

“You’ll get through this.”

“Will I?”

“Yeah. You’ve gotten through everything else before.”

“I just feel like shit.”

“Oh, you definitely will. For a good while. That’s one of the concussion side effects that no one really talks about. The misery. The emotional dysregulation. I saw it with Sonic in his most recent one.”

The hot flashes, the pain, the crying. The absolute misery of it all. So many nights, Shadow woke up to Sonic’s tears and pleadings of help. So many nights, he put cold towels on Sonic’s forehead to bring down the heat from the hot flash, or console him from the pain that reminded him of a worser incident.

It was the first time that in his entire contractor career, Shadow took time off GUN missions. He had more than enough in his savings to keep them afloat, enough paid time off saved up. 

Sonic was miserable for a very long time. But Shadow stuck by his side. It had only happened three weeks into their official relationship status as a couple and it had been due to an accident in trying to subdue a villain of the month who got a little too cocky with AI robots. 

Eventually, it got better. He got better. It was possible. Silver could get through it too. But where Sonic was cocky and confident, Silver was sensitive and cautious. He was the youngest of the entire group. 

But Shadow had a few too many nightmares of being a nurse to Maria in the worst of the chronic pain from the sickness too.

“It’s going to get worse before it gets better, but it’s still going to get better. You just have to take it easy.”

“It’s impossible for me to take it easy. I don’t want to miss the rest of the semester.”

“You have a medical excuse.”

“Still. In the future, back home, we didn’t have an educational system. To miss out because I’m weak would be ungrateful to the sacrifice of coming to a better time.”

“It was an unexpected injury. Any hit to the head is serious, even if we have heightened abilities. You won’t be doing yourself a favor by beating yourself up more than the hit to your head already has.”

“That’s…true, I guess.”

“Yeah. So go back to sleep. I’ll be here.”

“Thank you.”

It was around 4 in the afternoon after eating lunch when Silver felt enough better to respond to the messages at the lowest brightness, dark mode, extra dim filter and even more dim string lights in his room lit up.

🤪 Problematic Bachelors 🤪

🥈🤕 Silver: Good morrnis 
🦎 Espió: Hey!!
🥈🤕 Silver: WHICH ONE OF GOU FUCKERS CHANGED MY EMOJIT
🦎 Espió: i haven’t the slightest idea, brother. How are you feeling?
🥈🤕 Silver: Like absolute SHIT!!! i want to kill mtsefl this is BULLSHIT 
🌭 Sonic: Welcome to the concussion club, brother. How do you like it?
🥈🤕 Silver: i fucking hate it!!
🌭 Sonic: Yeah, I don’t miss it 🫠
🥈🤕 Silver: im so mad!!! i dont know what hurts more; my head or my PRIDE
🥈🤕 Silver: im fucking miserabvle, i can barely type ,my room is completely blacked out. im on bed rest. i can’t stop crying 😭 i have to email my professors to give me extensions or mercy or pity or a gun to my head until this thing clears ups
🥈🤕 Silver: *upp
🥈🤕 Silver: whateved
🌭 Sonic: Don’t worry about the professors. They will understand. Trust me, I had to talk to them last time about it with mine and they were angels about it. It’s gonna get better, Silvy. I swear. But the first few days are gonna SUCK. Ask Shadow. He knows 😮‍💨
🌭 Sonic: Those who know 💀
☕ Shadow: And good lord, do I know. But Sonic is right. Worrying about the rest of it will make it worse.
💋 Rouge: @silver: Can you ask for a better medicine dose?
🥈🤕 Silver: just over the counter stuff. theres no medicine medicine for concussions :c  
💋 Rouge: I know a guy 😏 
🥈🤕 Silver: i dontwanna risk it ty tho
💋 Rouge: 😘
🦎 Espió: Silvs, I told Charmy you hit your head and he told me to tell you “I hope you feel better, Tio Silver!”
🥈🤕 Silver: 🥹 Tell him I say thank you!! Annd good luck in his game tomorrow
🦎 Espió: Will do. He wants to visit when you’re ready for more company.
🤕🥈 Silver: Totally, i miss the litte guy 
🌭 Sonic: En route to the objective.
🥈🤕Silver: 😁
🌭 Sonic: Do you have Excedrin?
🌭 Sonic: Class was fucking HORRIBLE today.
🥈🤕 Silver: Industrals strength, brother.
🌭 Sonic: Good. I’ll take two ✌🏻 please
🥈🤕 Silver: You got ittt
🌭 Sonic: I’m outside. Passcode?
🥈🤕 Silver: 2006
🌭 Sonic: You and Blaze’s anniversary?
🥈🤕 Silver: Ye 😍
🌭 Sonic: Haha gay.
🥈🤕 Silver: I know you are but what am I? 
🌭 Sonic: gayer 😘 

🤪 Problematic Bachelors | Wear A Helmet You Silver Quilled Fuckhead 🤪

🥈🤕 Silver: I FUCKINGF HATE YALKK
🥈🤕 Silver: 🤕🤕🤕🤕🤕🤕🤕
🪻 Blaze: Two rung ladder skip. That’s all. I miss you.

“Hey,” Sonic greeted softly. He leaned down to half hug Silver, who weakly hugged him back. 

“Hi,” Silver muttered.

“How’ya feeling, buddy?”

“Like shit.”

“Yeah, a bonk to the head does that.” Sonic patted his shoulder. “I’d be more worried if you weren’t.”

“Eh.”

Sonic walked up to Shadow and kissed him softly, yet firmly. 

“Have you made dinner?”

“Not yet.”

“I got it handled. You keep the child company.”

Sonic brushed his thumb against his jaw, then quietly left to the kitchen.

The room was quiet other than the white noise machine that was kept on. But somehow, the heartbeat in Shadow's throat was louder than any other sound in the world.

The air mattress was inflated and placed onto the ground. Sonic and Shadow took their spots. Silver was already asleep on the bed. He was a heavy sleeper, even before the injury happened.  

“Think he’ll be okay?” Sonic asked softly.

“I think so. He’s just not used to the ass whoopings like we are.”

“Heh, true. There’s a reason he’s called the child of the group...More reason to be protective of him.” Sonic trailed off. 

Shadow knew him better than he knew himself. “Hey. What’s on your mind?”

“Is this how it was when I had my concussion?”

“What do you mean?”

“The stress. The fear. Checking on me constantly, making sure I’m okay, taking time off…It must have been a burden.”

“Not at all. You were never a burden to me. You never will be. I would take care of you again, without hesitation. In a heartbeat.”

Sonic was stunned. Suddenly, he lurched forward and kissed Shadow. A deep kiss, yet quiet. He held both sides of his face and continued to kiss him.

On instinct, Shadow kissed him back. The kisses were frantic, warm and endless. Sonic pulled away to catch his breath. He hugged him close. 

“Thank you.”

Shadow still wasn’t sure what he meant by that, or why Sonic was thanking him in the first place for something he did not need to be thanked for. But even now, half a year into their relationship, Sonic said and did so many things that Shadow was still figuring out. Maybe they're both figuring it out as they went. Former rivals, now lovers, and it felt both natural and also unexpected all at once. What was that saying? Winging it?

“Of course.”

They remained in silence for a while, Silver’s light snores filling the air next to the hum of the air conditioning. Sonic was soon falling asleep.

Alarm set to wake him up in three and a half hours to check on Silver, Shadow finally slept too.

Chapter Text

🤪 Problematic Bachelors 🤪 

💋 Rouge: I just met Robotnik’s baby daddy. 

🪻Blaze: wait WHAT

🌭 Sonic: ✋🏼🛑🧢 

🌭 Sonic: STOP THE CAP 

🌭 Sonic: SINCE WHEN IS EGGMAN QUEER 

💋 Rouge: So this morning, I was getting some coffee at the Mean Bean by Main and he walked in with his daughter. He saw my GUN jacket and we started chatting. And turns out, he used to work for them back in the day with Robotnik before they got married. Now, he’s a stay at home dad to their daughter. He is also the owner of the Mean Bean coffee chain here in the city. He likes to get the drinks at the Main location because they’re ‘better quality’ than the North location.

💋 Rouge: We talked a little bit about Robotnik. “Ivo is a dumbass and he needs to get his shit together. But no matter what, he’s a good father to our girl.” And I met her. Cute kid too. Her name is Sage. She’s 9 years old or so. She lost a tooth and was so proud of it 🥹 She gave me a big hug. He paid for my drink and left because they were going to run errands. The husband is named Aban Stone. 

💋 Rouge: And he is HOT.

🦎 Espió: What were their orders? I am a strong believer in that you can tell a lot by someone with their coffee orders.

🦎 Espió: Me and Vex judge everyone’s drinks at the cafe all the time 😂 

💋 Rouge: I do the same at the bar 😂 but he ordered a double shot espresso black coffee large and a small hot chocolate for Sage.

🦎 Espió: Ah yes 😌 The classic Espresso Adult and Hot Cocoa Child order. 

🦎 Espió: A man of honor. Good thing he’s not crazy and gives a little kid caffeine.

🪻 Blaze: You don’t give Charmy caffeine?

🦎Espió: Nope. 

🪻 Blaze: 😯 Then how is he so energetic?

🦎 Espió: He’s just like that ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

☕ Shadow: Hah. Stone never changed. 

💐 Amy: You knew Agent Stone?

☕ Shadow: Of course I did. Dr. Robotnik is bisexual. He’s been bisexual for decades. 

🌭 Sonic: WHOA, HE’S BISEXUAL

☕ Shadow: Yes.

🌭 Sonic: AND YOU’RE BARELY TELLING ME NOW

Several people are typing…

☕ Shadow: Yes, he told me himself before he introduced me to Agent Stone. I didn’t know if they were both out or not so I never said anything. It wasn’t my business. 

🥈 Silver: I had no idea??!

☕ Shadow: Just because Robotnik is a villain it doesn’t mean I’m going to out him. In the three months I worked with them, they were both nothing but kind to me outside of work. Especially Agent Stone. 

💐 Amy: I did not have Robotnik bisexual gay married to hot dilf on my bingo card.

☕ Shadow: How he managed to marry Agent Stone is beyond me, though. That man is way too good for him. Robotnik said so himself. 

☕ Shadow: One of life’s greatest mysteries, I suppose.

💐 Amy: How is Stone like?

☕ Shadow: Complete opposite of Robotnik. He is extremely kind. And loyal. And damn good at making coffee. And way out of Robotnik’s league. I remember when Sage was born. I got to hold her. They’re good parents. Toxic to each other, but I guess they’re okay with it. Healthy parenting, toxic romance. I don’t know. Don’t ask. I don’t think about it much.

💋 Rouge: Here’s a pic of Stone.

💋 Rouge: 🖼️📎

🥈 Silver: ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME???

🥈Silver: HE’S SO HOT

🌭 Sonic: HOW DID ROBOTNIK PULL SUCH A BADDIE??

☕ Shadow: Beats me.

💐 Amy: 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

💋 Rouge: I KNOW RIGHT???

🪻Blaze: Have you seen young Robotnik though? He’s handsome too. Not as handsome as Stone. Stone is…wow.

🦎 Espió: Shawty fine af 

🦎 Espió: Stone, not Robotnik

💋 Rouge: Don’t speak too soon. I found a picture of a young Robotnik back in the day when he used to work for the government and wasn’t as much of an asshole.

💋 Rouge: 🖼️📎

🦎 Espió: DAMN 

🦎 Espió: Ok shawty fine af too

🦎 Espió: Hotbotnik 😩🤌🏼🔥

💐 Amy: JAJAJAJJA HOTBOTNIK

💎 Knuckles: Absolutely nothing prepared me for any of this information. Still…not bad at all.

🐊 Vector: Ok. Imma keep it real with y’all, chiefs. In regards to Agent Stone…Would ✊🏼

💐 Amy: NOT THE WOULD

💐 Amy: Would

🦎 Espió: Would ✊🏼

🦎 Espió: Yeah ok, Young Hotbotnik too. Would. 

🪻 Blaze: WOULD!!! To both.

🥈 Silver: I’m not even offended. Would.

🌭 Sonic: @rouge Did you tell Agent Stone that he can do so much better?

💋 Rouge: No 😂 I think he knows that already. But love makes you do stupid things and be with stupid people.

💋 Rouge: Just ask Shadow! He’s with you! 😘 

🌭 Sonic: GIRL FUCK YOU!!!

☕ Shadow: 😑

💋 Rouge: 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 

🌭 Sonic: 😡😡😡

A week later, Shadow began to do student teaching. It was almost the middle of August. How had the year flown so fast? He was preparing for the day to have guardians and their child to meet him for, well, Meet The Teacher.

And to his surprise, he saw Sage’s name on his class roster. 

Wow. A small world.

“Sage, look!” Stone exclaimed. “It’s Mister Shadow!”

“Shadow!” Sage ran to him and gave him a big hug. It had been a long time since he had last seen her, but she remembered him. She was smiling from ear to ear. Bright red eyes looked into his and her smile showed a missing tooth.

Shadow leaned down and hugged her. She smelled like candy, no doubt having tons of perfume on stock now. He had finally seen Cream’s room when he carried her to her bed the other night after she fell asleep on the couch and surely enough—perfumes. Body mists. Everywhere. Oh boy. Another Amy and Blaze and Rouge in the making. And another Sonic and Silver. 

Sage let go and Stone walked forward and Shadow hugged him first. It was like seeing an old friend. He still kept in touch with him, no matter how much time had passed. His bond with Stone would never fade.

“Look at you!” Stone said with a smile. He held both sides of Shadow’s head with an affection that only belonged to him. “You’re all grown up!”

Shadow smiled. He couldn’t deny that his eyes wanted to water a little bit.

“I can’t believe you’re a teacher now.” Stone patted his back.

“Student teacher. I still have Year 3 to finish.”

“Honestly, Year 3 is the worst one, but not as bad as Year 2. Year 4 goes by fast. Not that you’re any stranger to it.”

Shadow looked over at Sage, who was looking at the books lined up on the shelf. “To think I held her when she was born and now she’s a student…”

“Time flies by too fast. But you’re doing great,” Stone said. “I’m much more relieved knowing you’ll be teaching her.”

“How’s Ivo doing?”

“He’s…getting it together. But do not worry about him. Walk me through this lesson plan. Let’s see what my girl is going to be learning.”

More parents came through, but Shadow did not know any of them. Until...

“Charmy?”

“WASSUP, HOMIE!” Charmy loudly greeted.

“Please don’t call me that.”

Charmy dapped him up with professional level practice that Shadow knew came from Espio and Vector. Out of instinct, Shadow did it. Then he paused. Charmy is 9. How did he—

Whatever.

“Please call me by Mister,” Shadow said wearily. 

“Okay, Mister Homie!”

Shadow sighed. 

What the hell, sure.

Espio burst out laughing upon walking in once he realized that Shadow would be the student teacher.

“Well! I guess I can skip this Meet-The-Teacher thing.”

“Uh, said who?” Shadow asked flatly. “Come on, gecko. We need to go over the syllabus.”

Espio laughed even harder and followed Shadow to the half round table.

Right after Friday’s school day, Shadow got an emergency call from Vanilla. Big emergency happened and she had to go to the hospital right away. All hands on deck. Shadow went immediately.

Cream was fidgety and she couldn't sleep. When Vanilla wasn't home at night, she became more agitated. 

Shadow tried everything to make her feel better. TV didn't work. Neither did games. She was too nervous. Cheese was worried too. 

So instead of trying to calm her with insisting that it will be okay, he sat down and listened. 

Cream talked about everything. How she was scared that mami wouldn't come home. But Shadow listened and just let her talk it out. Reassured her it would be okay and that mami was with her friends and with the doctors that Cream had met before. He was one hundred percent focused on just making her feel better. Away from his phone, from the news. He avoided the news anyways.

Eventually, he distracted Cream with a new TV show called Bluey that she hadn’t seen before. He couldn’t deny that Cream had calmed down some. She got her blanket and snuggled on the couch. He put on the Spanish Latin America dub with English subtitles, mostly for him to learn.

Cream was easily entertained by it and laughed along. Shadow enjoyed the show too.

At almost 4 in the morning, after nodding off for so long, Cream fell asleep on the couch, Cheese on a pillow. It was not ideal to mess up her sleep schedule, he felt a pang of guilt at that, but she was so nervous. Poor girl.

Shadow tucked her in softly and went to the other couch. He took off his shoes and laid down, with the intent to just keep watching the TV show and not look at his phone. It was actually an interesting plot for a kids show. Theme song was cute. This could be used in his classroom, actually…

So he watched it and watched it. Laid down. Closed his eyes for a moment...

Vanilla came in at almost six in the morning. Shadow stirred awake when she covered him with a blanket. 

Parts of her scrubs were stained in blood. She tried to shield them from sight with her arm.

“Oh god—I’m so sorry.”

“Don't be. You're exhausted.” Vanilla’s voice was too. “I know I am.”

“It was irresponsible of me to fall asleep.”

“No, my little one. It was natural.”

“What happened?” Shadow whispered. 

“Awful things. I'll tell you later about the shift from hell. Go back to sleep, mi niño.” She patted his head. “Cream is asleep still. I have a feeling she didn’t sleep much last night.”

“We fell asleep around 4 in the morning. I’m sorry. She was too nervous…”

“It’s okay. I understand. That girl doesn’t even sleep early even if we tried. Don’t worry about that. Go back to sleep, okay?” 

“Okay. Do I move her to her room?”

“She is okay here. You are too. Sleep in. We all need it.” Vanilla kissed the top of his head. “Get rest.”

Before he settled back in, Shadow’s phone buzzed. It was Sonic. He quietly picked up. “Hello?” He whispered, voice heavy with sleep.”

“Hey babe, are you guys okay?”

“I’m okay. Cream and Cheese are okay. We all fell asleep at 4 in the morning. But Vanilla is home. She’s going to sleep. I will stay here for a while. Are you okay?”

“I’m…fine. But yes, sleep. That’s good. You need it.” 

“What happened?”

“I…still don’t know,” Sonic said. “I’ll tell you more when I find out. Just…go back to sleep. I will too, and also swing over later today. Vanny invited me for dinner. Do not...worry about it, okay?”

“Sonic.”

“Too much is happening. Do not look at the news, there is a bunch of bullshit right now and nothing is outright fact yet. Just know…I love you.”

“I love you too,” Shadow said just as softly. “I’ll talk to you later.”

At eleven, Shadow woke up to Cream yawning. 7 hours of sleep for her. Not bad. He made food for her in the kitchen, brewing the strongest coffee he could find for himself. He did not look at the news.

He opened Sonic’s messages. And his heart sank with the explanation.

Turns out there had been a major accident on a railway and needed all hands-on deck. Shadow avoided the news as it was. It was a brutal accident with casualties. No foul play. Everyone except Shadow and Vector was present, essentially. Since Charmy was with Vector.

Amy, Silver, Espio and Knuckles were called to help remove debris. Blaze had civilians be Reino del Sol nationals and urgently returned to the embassy to get more aid workers there. Sonic was summoned to help. Rouge was investigating for survivors. It was a brutal accident with casualties. Now the blood stains on Vanilla’s scrubs made sense. No wonder Vanilla looked exhausted. 

Shadow was so glad he avoided the news that night out of instinct. He had no missed calls from GUN or from the local officials. Good. 

He glanced at the table where Cream was happily eating her scrambled eggs and beans with her apple juice. Cream was in his high seat enjoying his own smaller plate too.

He served his own plate and saved more food for Vanilla. She would need it too.

But for now, he sat down at the table and joined Cream and Cheese to enjoy their meal. Tried to shield her and the little Chao from the real world, even if it was for a few moments.

Chapter Text

At home, the moment the doors were closed and locked, Sonic held Shadow tightly. Tighter than he ever had before, or at least in a long time. It was a desperate hug, a hug of gratitude and relief.

“It was horrible out there—I’ve never seen anything like it—There wasn’t any foul play. It was just an accident. It was a legitimate accident. I don’t understand it…”

Shadow hugged him back. 

“You’re all I kept thinking about,” Sonic confessed shakily. “You’re all that was on my mind. I love you. I love you.”

And suddenly, Shadow knew what the phrase hug your loved one close meant now. 

“Hey…” Shadow said softly. “It’s okay. I love you too. Let’s go lay down, okay?”

\\\\\\\\\\

The students were devastated. 

While the students ate their breakfast and put their things away in unnatural silence that did not belong to his chaotic classroom of grade schoolers, Shadow took a moment and thought of his teachings. But he realized…these kids were his students. He was a teacher to them now. 

Oh god.

He had to get out of his shell, everyone told him that. But he was very…quiet. He kept thinking of what to do. What to say.

After the bell rang, the students cleaned up and sat down at their places in the rug. Charmy was uncharacteristically quiet and had particularly hugged him longer in the morning when he greeted him at the door. Sage was too quiet. She never was. 

This was so unnerving. 

“Uh…Look,” Shadow began softly. “I know what happened last week is sad. And scary. And I’m not going to lie to you and say it is going to be okay and ignore everything, and pretend nothing happened. Because that will only do more harm than good.”

Oh, he was fumbling this so badly.

“And it is okay to be sad and not know what to feel. And for the adults in your life, it’s the same thing too. They may not know what to say or feel… But just know you’re not lost in all this, okay?” Shadow asked. “Just know it’s normal to feel confused, scared, angry and sad…it’s normal. There is nothing wrong with that.”

The kids were listening intently.

“I’m glad you’re all here today. I know our focus isn’t here right now, so…y’know what? Let’s go outside and get some fresh air around the track. How about that?”

“Recess?!” Frankie exclaimed near the back. “This early?! What about our routine?”

“No, not recess,” Shadow corrected. “A walk. A walk. Come on, in line. Twenty-minute walk and then we get the day started.”

It was a bit of a sight to see from afar, Shadow thought to himself. In the empty field, it was a him and a group of his grade schoolers as they walked around the track. It took a few moments, but slowly, the chatter began to spark up and some of the kids began skipping around. Then one challenged another one to a race. Shadow dissuaded it and told them to wait until recess, in four hours. Charmy held Shadow’s left hand, and Sage held Shadow’s right, and talked about how he was going to play a hockey game that upcoming Saturday against a rival team he had not faced since last year. 

And eventually, seven minutes into the walk, Shadow gave up. The kids were energetic and the playground was tempting, like an oasis with water. 

Shadow sighed. “Okay, recess time. Go. Twenty minutes.”

And the kids ran to the playground, laughing, cheering and yelling at one another. They had too much energy now and might as well get it out of their system before they began math.

“Mister Shadow?” Sage asked.

Shadow looked down and he saw Sage’s bright red eyes and pale blonde, almost silver colored hair pushed up with a green headband. 

“Yes?”

“Thank you for being nice to me.” Sage smiled. And she leaned against his arm in a half hug, then let go to play with Charmy.

Later on, when the kids went to their art class during Shadow’s lesson planning period, he locked the classroom door and cried his eyes out.

 A year ago, Shadow was invited to Thanksgiving with Sonic at Sonic's house.

The morning started with a migraine and Shadow wanted to die. He was exhausted. He hated every second of this migraine. and during the night of Thanksgiving, Shadow went outside. He needed to vape.

Everything was loud. Everything was stressful. He was so tired. So fed up. Everyone was loud and annoying. He wanted to kill mostly everyone and himself at the store while getting things ready. Drop the ring inhibitors, brother. Fuck around and find out.

He walked far away from the house and went to his distant car. Out of precaution for the alarm to go off, he unlocked it and with a slight huff, he jumped onto the steel hood. This was his moment of slight peace from everyone and everything.

Normally, he would watch the sky and ponder the stars. But not today.

Instead, he reached inside his jacket and pulled out his vape. He took a long inhale and let it simmer into his lungs briefly before exhaling.

He heard the crunch of the snow and Espio lifted himself onto the car. He was stern. So he crossed his arms. Looked at Shadow. And held his hand out.

“Pass me that shit, brother.”

“These are so bad for you.”

“I know. I can’t get enough,” Espio said before taking a hit. He sighed it out, the vapor blending in with his frozen breath in the wintry air. “I swore I was going to quit…but circumstances like this make me give up on that decision.”

“Was today stressful for you too?”

“Yeah. Like hell. Oven busted. Vector broke it. Charmy had an early game…We were so tired. Charmy lost and he doesn’t take losing very well. He gets it from Vector. We had to take him out for pastries for a little while. I’m just tired. I’m not doing any shopping...But...we will make it through tonight. Hungover, probably.”

Shadow was already three shots in. And when they both hunkered inside to the warm house, he went for his fourth. 

Yeah, he was set for the night.

Later on, Espio, Vector, Blaze and Rouge were playing a loudly violent game of UNO on the back porch. All while Amy was trying to fix the Bluetooth connection to the projector screen. Knuckles stepped out with Vanilla to set up an impromptu fire pit - those came with a lot of Mobian houses, it seemed.

Omega was finally back from his mission and sitting with the children as they played Minecraft. 

Shadow was...drunk, it was a holiday. He wasn't driving. He was going to be fine. 

Sonic was tired from hosting Thanksgiving. Shadow knew that. He stood in the kitchen by himself, leaning against the counter and just staring at the stove. Shadow knew that stare. That burnt out, exhausted stare into the distance or whatever object was in the immediate center periphery. 

“Hey.”

Sonic jumped. He never did that. He stood up straight and recovered his posture briefly.

“Hey!” He greeted Shadow cheerfully. Although it was not as close to his natural tone. “What’s up?”

“I should be asking you that.”

“Oh. It’s nothing. I’m good. Just a little tired. No big deal.”

“Right.”

Shadow stood at the entrance of the kitchen for a small moment, then on autopilot, walked to Sonic and leaned against the island in front of him.

“What’s going on?”

“I—”

The doorbell rang.

“DOORBELL!” Tails called out from the living room.

“I got it,” Shadow said softly. He pressed his hand against Sonic’s shoulder. A slight form of affection. Whatever it meant.

He was DRUNK. 

In the living room, Silver, Cream and Charmy were sitting on the floor and still playing on the Nintendo Switch, crafting away and chattering excitedly about the garden. They paid no mind as Shadow walked behind the couch to the front door. Tails was on the couch with the third controller, and as it seemed by the bottom screen, was trying to build a fence. Omega was on the arm chair with a blanket on his lap, which made no sense, but it was endearing in its own way.

“I got the door,” Shadow said a little uselessly to Tails, who waved him away and kept building his fence and was really concentrated on it. 

He opened it.

Only to see Sally Acorn.

Sonic’s ex.

They both regarded each other in silence for a moment.

“Hi.” Sally greeted first.

“...Hi. Uh…How can I help you?”

“I just came to pick up some things.”

“Oh.” Shadow blinked. He stepped back and held the door wider. “Come in.”

“Is Sonic here?”

Obviously.

“In the kitchen.” Shadow said. He walked around the couch and was grateful that the kids were still so locked in with their game on the screen. Omega turned to him, and blinked, but said nothing. But he knew. He was one who KNEW. 

In the kitchen, Sonic turned around and gasped.

“Sally?” Sonic asked.

“Hi.”

“What are you doing here?”

“I was in the neighborhood.”

“You don’t live here.”

“I’m not staying,” Sally said briskly, all business and to the point. “I have a charity event to go to in Station Square. And since I was here, I came to pick up my things.”

“Oh,” Sonic repeated. 

“...Do you not have them ready?” Sally asked with a slight unamused laugh. “I said I was coming this week.”

“Yeah, I do have them ready. I just didn’t think it would be today. Seeing that you don’t care much about holidays.”

“Huh.”

“I’ll—go. Get them,” Shadow spoke up uselessly and quickly exited the kitchen. He went to the gap under the stairs where there was miscellaneous storage—

Only to have his arm pulled by Knuckles to the side.

When the fuck did he get inside?

“Can I help you?” Shadow asked. 

“Why is Sally here?” Knuckles asked in a stage whisper. 

To his credit, Shadow slowly shook off Knuckles’s hand instead of slamming him down like Batista did during the golden days of being a wrestler. “Beats me. She said she just wanted to pick up her things.” He pushed past some of the Christmas containers and finally found the smaller box with Sally’s belongings that he remembered Sonic putting there. Not much; toiletries, hair brushes, hair products. A jasmine scented perfume that made Sonic sneeze a lot. Two scarves. A folded up hoodie from her alma mater. 

“Out of all the days in the week she could have picked to get her things, why did she conveniently choose Thanksgiving, when she knew everyone would be here?”

Shadow did not know what to say to that.

“Beats me,” he said again and picked up the box. “Don't worry, Red. I’ll get rid of her.”

“How?”

“Trust.”

Sonic didn’t talk about Sally that much to the group. No one did. It was a messy breakup; Shadow knew that. But why she wanted to pick up her things months after the break up during Thanksgiving was beyond his gauge of ideas.

But last that he knew, she was overseas on a long-term diplomacy mission? Shadow didn’t care.

He made it back to the kitchen and Sonic was a little—hostile. 

Shit.

“Is there a problem here?”

“Oh, so you’re going to a charity event,” Sonic said. “I didn’t know you went to those. Since when do you like Thanksgiving?”

“I don’t,” Sally said. “I am…merely doing it for the community’s wellbeing.”

“Right. Right. Since when do you care about the community outside of Alcorn.”

Only Mobian people called Kingdom of Acorn by Alcorn, as an insult and as a joke, due to the hostile relationships after the first wave. Sonic rarely did—he regarded it, and all imperial kingdoms, with an eye roll.

Shadow would have choked if he had been drinking. Maybe he should be drinking right now. The night is still young—

“Wow. You have not changed at all.” 

“You haven’t either.”

“Here are your things.” Shadow held them out to her unceremoniously. 

“Oh. They were ready after all.”

“A highly undeserved favor for you,” Shadow said, a little flatly and a little dangerously. No. He was not—not falling for the bait. Sally was always an instigator with him. Nope. He was not going to fall for it. “But…It is the season of giving back. Even for the unwanted.”

The air was so cold.

Instead of snatching it, Sally hummed and took the box gracefully from Shadow’s arms.

“Well, I should be going,” she said briskly. “I do not want to run late. I try to lack that tendency.”

Another snark at Sonic.

Shadow was going to kill her.

“I’ll walk you out,” Shadow said. 

“Very chivalrous of you.”

“I prefer to call it decency.” Shadow gestured to the doorway. “Ladies first.”

Sally chuckled. “Well…no rush. Goodnight, Sonic.”

“...Goodnight.”

The kids were too locked in to notice. But Shadow walked Sally out the door without incident.

“For what it’s worth, I’m happy for you,” Sally said simply.

“What?”

Sally looked over her shoulder then just turned around. “The way he looks at you? He never looked at me like that.”

Shadow froze. 

“No one is the bad guy here,” Sally said. “It is good that you're together. Sonic and I just outgrew each other. It’s not the same as it used to be before you came in. Everyone changes. Circumstances change. Feelings change. But we all mostly become better versions of our own selves—”

“Princess Sally, go fuck yourself,” Shadow said simply. “Happy Thanksgiving.”

He turned on his heel and left to the front door and shut it behind him.

As expected, Sonic was no longer in the kitchen, but in his room. Crashing out.

Shadow was trying to talk to him but it was not working.

“I’m—trying to get better. About being late. I just—It is going to sound like an excuse, I know, I know, and I’m so sorry, but I forget—” Sonic confessed. His voice cracked. “I fucking forget. There’s so much on my mind and it sometimes goes faster than I run and I can’t catch up. I can’t. I hate myself for forgetting things, places and events, and I hate myself for not being better about it.”

Tears were starting to pour.

“It’s why my room is a mess, it’s why I fall behind in a class and spend hours trying to focus and trying to catch up—I don’t get why—I don’t get why she came here tonight. I can’t—She hates celebrating the holidays. I would go out for every birthday, every anniversary, everything. She would just stay behind in Alcorn. I was the only one who gave a shit. I still am! Last year for Christmas, I didn’t get a gift from her. She forgot it was a holiday. Tails had a tournament out of town and was coming back Thanksgiving morning, and I spent the night before Thanksgiving crying my fucking eyes out.”

“Breathe.”

“I can’t.” Sonic sobbed. “I can’t.”

“You can,” Shadow said softly. Unexpectedly, he reached out to hold Sonic’s hands together. “It’s okay.”

“Is it?”

“Yes. She’s gone now. You’re done with her. She won’t be coming back.”

“Are you sure—”

“I told her to go fuck herself and wished her a happy thanksgiving.”

Sonic paused and was baffled in shock. Shadow wasn’t sure if he said or did the right thing. 

But Sonic instead just said nothing. Started laughing hysterically. 

“What the fuck—that’s so random. Dude!”

“Listen. I—I don’t like Sally. I never did. None of us in the group did, okay? She crossed a lot of lines tonight, and she made her feelings known—and I granted her the same courtesy.”

“By telling her to go fuck herself on my front lawn?”

“Yes.”

“On Thanksgiving?!”

“Yes.”

“Dude—” Sonic exhaled. “Oh my god. I didn’t—I didn’t expect it.” 

“I’m not sorry. And I know she is under a lot of pressure. I know it is not easy being royalty. I know. But her being unable to cope with her stress? That sounds like a skill issue.”

“No one has ever defended my honor like that.” Sonic's voice was soft. A little stunned. And he smiled.

UH OH!

“I wasn’t defending your honor,” Shadow said gruffly, while blushing furiously. “You don't even--have honor for me to defend! And even if you did, I would never! You don't--or integrity! Or--you know! You're fake! I was merely not letting her ruin the night. And you--are bad at things. Sally talking shit about you was uncalled—that’s what I’m here for. I won’t let that skank get away with insulting you when that’s my job. You’re bad at a lot of things, but you don’t need to crash out over her. Come on. I’m gonna wash your face. Fuck that bitch. It's Thanksgiving. It's our night. Let's go have fun.”

Chapter Text

Tails’s birthday party almost goes exceptionally well.

//
Sonic had been in the middle of the library courtyard when it happened. Early, empty. He was taking a breather. 

Truth was that Sonic dropped out because of heart issues.

It was during finals week when his heart raced badly enough to send him to the emergency room. Then it stopped.

It came back. But Shadow heard and saw the monitor go into a line. Heard the shrill beep that went on for too long. The tranquilizing medicine was not functioning with Sonic’s rapid metabolism. Too much would do more harm than good; too little would cause him to suffer more.
\\\\
When Sonic was coherent, he turned to Shadow and said “Don’t tell Tails.”

And Shadow had been ready to dial Tails.

“Sonic…”

“Please don’t tell him. I’ll—I’ll tell him later.”

Vanilla Coneja

Hey Vanilla, there’s no easy way to say this. I don’t know who else to call. But Sonic is in the hospital. Something is wrong with his heart…he collapsed outside the library. I don’t know what happened. His heart stopped beating for a few minutes. They brought him back. I…I don’t know what to do.

Oh dios! Tell me what hospital, sweetheart. I’ll be there immediately. 

I’m at the one you work at. I don’t know where else to go.

Wait. What about Cream?

I’ll bring her with me. Pediatrics is familiar with her and they love to have her visit to interact with the children.

Give me ten minutes, sweetheart. I’ll be there.

Vanilla arrived in six minutes.

“I came as fast as I could.” Vanilla found him right away in the private waiting room in the cardiology wing.

“It’s okay…I don’t…” Shadow was at a lost for words.

She hugged him. And numbly, he somehow hugged her back. And he felt the shaking before he heard it. He felt it rattling in his chest. 

And he sobbed. 

He didn’t know what to do. What to say. 

“Oh, mi niño…”

Oh, my little boy…

“His heart stopped.” And the word slipped out before he could stop it. “Mama, his heart stopped. I'm scared.” 

“This is the best hospital in the region. He’s in good hands. I know you're scared, but it is going to be okay, my child.”

"Arrhythmia was what the physician called it, though she did not have more of an answer for it other than that. They were investigating further. I'm not ready to see him like this, I'm not--"

“I’ll go in with him,” Vanilla offered. "Take a breather. I'm here.

“Okay.”

Half an hour passed. The nurse said that Sonic was doing some...test. EKG? He didn't know what that was.

Shadow had sat down on the chair and drank his stale coffee with shaky hands. 

Somehow, Amy found out, and Tails swung the door open of the waiting room. 

To say that Tails was upset about not knowing about Sonic’s arrhythmic emergency was an understatement.

He was livid. 

Now, Shadow knew that Tails did not like him. That much was true. Granted, he did try to kill him more than a few times when he and Sonic did not have their nonsense together. Tails did not trust him. At all. 

But Tails was in his fourth year of high school. He was almost there. And Sonic had said—insisted—to not tell him anything.

Tails punched him square in the face. 

Hard.

“What did you do?!”

Shadow winced and part of him wanted to punch Tails back. But he paused. 

He held back. No, he could not do that. He should not do that. 

Tails was upset. He was scared. It was not personal.

“Nothing.”

“I had to find out from Amy?! Why?!”

“I chose to not tell you,” Shadow lied. “I convinced Sonic to not to. How Amy found out—I don’t know.”

“Why?!”

“You’re young.”

“Oh my god. You did not just say that to me!” But Tails took a deep breath. “I...I need some air before I put you in the morgue…”

“Take your time.”

“Don’t tell me what to do,” Tails snarled and left.

After repressing a panic attack, Shadow went to Sonic’s room. He was awake.

Doped up from the drugs, Sonic reached to hold the side of his head.

Shadow winced.

“What happened?”

Shadow gently pushed his hand away. 

“Shadow? Honey, what happened? You have a bruise on your cheek.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

“Babe?”

“Get rest,” Shadow said to him instead. He began to stand up. But, even now in the haze of the medication, Sonic was too fast and grasped his hand before he could be out of reach.

“Shadow, talk to me. What happened?”

“Nothing.”

“That bruise is not nothing.”

“It will fade.”

Tails punched me.

“I…hit it on the way from the library door,” Shadow lied. “I didn't see the step and I tripped. But Tails is here, he’s on his way—” Cooling down. “Amy told him.” Shadow heard his phone buzz. It was an email of some random promotion, of the world going on around him.

But he lied again instead.

“I have to take this call. Get some rest.” Shadow kissed his forehead. “I’ll be back.”

Shadow went to the staircase after checking that it was not an emergency exit.

He set a timer for fifteen minutes. 

And cried his fucking eyes out.

Now, it was mid-October. It was Tails’ birthday party. 

Shadow put on a fleece lined leather jacket and on impulse, reached for the inside pocket of another jacket, deeply hidden and folded behind any of the usual hoodies or crewnecks that Sonic would occasionally steal. 

For a snooping eye, it was an old case for his tactical watch. But for the ones who knew—him—it was the container that he kept his most infamous possession. 

His strawberry vape of the Tgem brand.

Stupid. It was stupid. It was so stupid. An echo of Thanksgiving from the previous year.

He took out the small vial of empty liquid, then refilled it quickly from the full vial. Bright red strawberry flavor still. Quickly, he slipped the vape into his zipper pocket inside his jacket. He hadn’t picked it up in months, but he had a feeling he would need it for this party, considering…well, considering everything.

“Babe?”

Shadow quickly zipped up the pocket with the most despised vice that he picked out of all of them.

He cleared his throat, smoothed down his quills. “Over here,” he said and stepped out of the closet and in front of the vanity, innocently looking for a cologne to wear. He picked the cedarwood scent. He’s never interacted with a cedarwood to know if it smelled like that. 

“There you are!” Sonic said with a grin. He faced him in the mirror. “And wowza. There. You. Are. Indeed!” He walked beside him and pressed a kiss to Shadow. “Hey handsome!”

Shadow huffed. Didn’t, to his credit, blush. But he smiled a little bit. Even now, almost—a year, or something—into their relationship, he wasn’t the best with compliments. 

“You look great,” Sonic said with a grin. 

“You do too.”

Sonic grabbed the keys off the dresser first. "I look hotter when I'm driving."

“It’s cold as fuck.”

The birthday party went off without a hitch.

“You made it!” Tails exclaimed. 

“Of course I did!” Sonic hugged him. “Again!” He picked him up in a hug and spun him around. “I can’t believe you’re turning three!”

“For the last time, I’m turning nineteen!”

“Happy birthday,” Shadow said quietly, then he cleared his throat. “Something for you.” He held out the gift bag. 

Tails nodded in acknowledgment. “Thank you.” 

The air, the music, though pleasant, felt too suffocating.

“I’m gonna get some air,” Shadow said to Sonic.

“You alright?”

“Just need a breather. Headache.” Vaguely true, but he figured it was true enough. “I’ll be back in a bit.” 

Sonic nodded. 

But before Shadow could leave, he kissed his hand. With a smile, Shadow squeezed Sonic’s hand in return before he let go. Guilt ate at him for not telling the truth. But before Shadow could wallow in it, or chicken out, he left through the front door and down the stairs of Tails’s walk up apartment. 

Cold air blasted onto his face, with scattered snowflakes with the eastward wind, out and about. The snow was still falling steadily, thick enough to pile onto the concrete. Shadow shut the door behind him.

He went down the sidewalk to the brightly lit playground that Cream used all the time when Vanilla babysat Tails. So many photographs of the two of them on the swings. So many. 

He finally got to see the playground in person when Sonic moved out of the house. He was tempted to go on the swing set that day, like Sonic had suggested on their way to their car, but…the circumstances didn’t feel right. 

But now, there was something so comforting about a swing set in the winter. 

Nevermind that he was going to be inhaling nicotine while swinging on it. 

He kept it a secret from everyone that he still vaped. Sonic hated it when he vaped. Absolutely despised it with a passion. But the hit of nicotine and strawberry felt amazing. And yes, maybe when he was twenty one and went to concerts with Rouge, Amy, Vector and Espio, he had a couple of cigarettes. Lit one from a vanilla candle. And yes, Sonic smoked a few times, but he promised to leave it behind. Shadow did not quite make that promise.

He shook off the snow from the swing and finally sat down. Decent height, he didn’t reach the ground. Durable. He took out the vape and took a long hit.

And it felt amazing. 

He held it in for a moment, let the cold vapor hit his lungs, then he let out a long, exhausted and finally relaxed sigh. The strawberry flavor vapor blended in with the frozen breath he let out. Cold inhale, warm exhale. It felt so good, despite it being so fucking cold outside. 

He took a moment to take the calm scenery in. Lightly, he swung his leg, the tiny creak of the metal chains not hurting his ears as the swing swung back and forth.

It was peaceful.

Just as he was preparing to take another hit, he felt a telekinetic slap on his hands and the vape pen went scattering on the snow covered ground. 

He quickly turned around to see Espio. 

“Shadow the motherfucking Hedgehog!” Espio called out. “Why the fuck are you vaping?! You shouldn’t be doing that! It’s bad for you!”

“I’m the ultimate life form.” Thankfully, the vape wasn’t too far from him. He leaned over and picked it up from the snow and brushed off some flakes. “It has no harm on me.” He took another hit.

He knew what was coming.

“Vaping is so bad for you.” There was silence. Espio sat on the swing next to him and held his hand out. “Pass me that shit.”

Shadow let out a laugh. A genuinely good laugh that he desperately needed. Espio was a serious and deadpan person, sometimes more than Shadow himself, but together, just the two of them? He was just as spontaneous as his own teammates, in his own zany way. He brought out a form of laughter from Shadow that no one else could. They walked around the city park for hours and smoked all night. 

Wordlessly, he handed him the vape and Espio wiped it off with his sleeve and took a long hit. 

“God. Fucking. DAMN!” Espio exclaimed. “I needed that!” He cleared his throat. Composed himself. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I haven’t vaped since last week.”

“Don’t tell me you’re one of those addicted airheads.”

“No, idiot, I ran out.” Espio took another hit. “I hope I won’t empty it.”

“Doubt so. I refilled it,” Shadow said with a shrug. 

“Cool.” Espio took another inhale. Waited. Let it out into the cold winter air. “Vector hates it when I vape. Or smoke. I thought about bringing my cigs, but Tails doesn’t like the smell at all, and well, it’s his party.”

“Same reason I didn’t bring mine. And Sonic doesn’t like it either. I hate myself for it anyways. I only vape when I’m stressed.”

“When did you pick it up?”

Not soon enough after the second wave. 

“GUN missions, though that was more of the incompetence from them. You?”

“After Eggman’s third wave,” Espio admitted. 

A beat of silence passed. “Who sent you?”

“Myself. I know you’re not much of a fan of parties.”

“I haven’t seen you in a while. How have you been?”

“It’s been alright. How about you?”

Espio let out a long sigh. “The usual.”

“You know Charmy turns ten  next weekend?”

Shadow almost choked on his inhale, but recovered. 

“What?”

“I’m serious. Our little Charlemagne turns ten.”

“You…are kidding me.”

“It’s so stressful raising a pre-teenager. Kid thinks since he is almost in the teens now, he can rule the world. By the way, this is your invitation too.” Espio kicked some snow at Shadow’s foot. And missed. “Fucker. Don’t you dare ditch. I know where you live.”

“I’ll be there. Is he excited?”

“Absolutely. He wants to have it at a bowling alley.” 

“If you don’t mind me asking…”

“Go for it.”

“How long have you and Vector been raising him?”

“Oh, we’ve been raising him since he was two months old.” 

Shadow all but balked in shock.

“You didn’t know?” Espio let out a laugh. “Well, we don’t really talk about it now, in your defense.”

“That’s exactly what Sonic said to me when I found out he was i-Kiribati last year.”

“I remember that!”

“Anyways, where was I during this?”

“You’re allegedly 24.”

“Almost 25, but yes.”

“You were in the freezer. This was right before you and Robok-bitch fucked around in the second wave,” Espio said with a laugh. 

“Oh.” Shadow was silent. “My bad.”

Espio waved his statement away. “Brother, we’re way past that. You were deep in the freezer. And deeper in the bisexual closet. Anyway, I can’t believe you didn’t know about how me and Vex got our kid.”

“I can always learn,” Shadow said. He got the vape and took his turn. 

“Alright! Time for the infodump of a lifetime! The first wave of the Eggman attacks left the region absolutely wrecked.”

“I remember learning about it.”

Espio took a hit. “By the time it was winter, Eggman was imprisoned. Recovery efforts from his destruction were already taking a long time, but we were not ready for the winter storm.”

Winters were harsh in this region of Mobius. 

“Half the power went out in the region that year. Ours was going in and out. So, me and Vex had just graduated from 12th year and finished our certification for our investigative licenses before the first wave. After cleaning up, we opened up the agency together. The moving process took a…few months with the Eggman attacks. But afterwards, we made it through. We didn’t have a lot left after the attacks, not that we owned much in the first place. We already lived at the office. Our bedroom was a mattress upstairs in the loft. We didn’t have much. I had no family left that I spoke to in Yucatán. Vector wasn’t on speaking terms with his family in Florida, so. Fuck it, we balled.”

Nineteen years old. It was startling to think how young he was at that time too.

“The office wasn’t even much of an office. A shackhouse. Vector kept calling it a Crackhouse. Fucker. Anyways, it was Christmas Eve. We had gotten food and were heading inside, but so much snow piled up while we were gone. So we stick the food upstairs, come outside with some shovels and we’re shoveling snow from the entrance again. It was freezing that night…me and Vector didn’t know what we were doing. He was bitching about something…probably that our dinner was going to be cold again by the time we went inside and wanted to watch something together before it got any late…Then we heard crying from the dumpster.

That’s when we found him. Little baby bee, wrapped up in some towels. Crying and crying. No tracks to be found of who did it, no note. Me and Vex panicked. We got the little guy, took him inside and I sat by the dingy radiator to warm him up with a blanket.” 

Charmy was found in a trash can?

“There was a city wide curfew due to the snowfall and only emergency vehicles being allowed. Vex calls Vanilla and she tells us to bring the kid to the hospital as soon as possible. We didn’t have a functioning car. The ambulances were so busy with so many accidents.” Espio waited. Took a long inhale, and Shadow remained silent and listened. “But like the saying goes—it takes a village. Our car had a flat, but Vector made some calls, some frantic messages in the groupchat. And we got a ride from Knuckles in his old ass car to the emergency room. 

The drive had to be slower because of the sleet. The heat was barely working in the car too. 

I couldn’t stop thinking about the kid. How it didn’t matter how he got there. Just that…I never wanted to leave him out of my sight. I just kept talking to him, and kept singing to him. Kept holding him…he was really tiny for his age.” Espio held his hands out to a vague yet small shape in front of him. “Bout that size. Cried and cried.

Sonic was dividing and conquering with the power outages all over the city and trying to get supplies to the shelters. But he still managed to keep up with the situation. You know what he's like.

“Vanilla and some doctors were waiting for us at the entrance with the smallest gurney I had ever seen. We didn’t hear anything for a long time. Vex and I were horrified. The heat was on in the waiting room, but I just remember being so cold from the panic. I just remember crying in Vector’s arms...”

“But the little man made it through. With his fingerprints, they found out his name; Charlemagne Bee. Charmy Bee. Prince Charming is what Vanilla still calls him. He was born two months prior in the same hospital.”

“We spent a week in that hospital. We didn’t even lock the doors to the office. What were the bandits gonna steal, anyway? All ninety nine cents, faulty radiator and a bronze ring from our drawer? In 17 degree weather?

The authorities almost had him be taken into foster care, but me and Vector begged to take in the kid. We begged the judge to let us take care of him. We were a sight. But gracefully, the judge knew we were heroes from the first wave, saw we had a support system, so she agreed to let us raise him. But everything was a wreck after the First Wave, so they couldn’t risk any more strain on the foster care system…I didn’t care. Whatever their reasoning was, I’m happy that they let us keep him. And well…the rest, as they say, is history.” Espio smiled. “Can you believe it?” 

“Wow,” Shadow said. For the lack of a better reaction. He genuinely did not expect any of that.

“What, did you just figure he spawned out of nowhere?”

“He technically did.”

“Ha!” Espio laughed. “Kind of right.”

He took another long hit of the vape.

“It’s brave to take care of a child.”

“Lots of people called it stupid. Said we were barely taking care of ourselves.” Espio shook his head. “In a way, they were right. It was a big risk.”

“Two nineteen year old jackasses fresh out of 12th year who didn’t have enough money for new tires, let alone for a baby bee in a trashcan.”

“I ain’t gonna lie to you, brother; it wasn’t easy. He cried and cried the first few months. Me and Vex did too. Some nights, we didn’t sleep at all. We got enough honeyed formula for him, but me and Vex survived off energy drinks and coffee. We missed meals so Charmy wouldn’t.”

Shadow handed him the vape.

“Did anyone help?”

“As much as they could. Economy went into a bad recession with the damage. But, yeah, man, everyone in our crew did. Babysitting, groceries, helping with rent. I wouldn’t trade my boy for the world.

But we saw his first steps. His first laugh. Heard his first word, and his first curse. His first time flying. You name it, we saw it. His first goal on the ice. His first fight,” Espio laughed. He handed the vape to Shadow. “Not that he won it. But he takes after his old man like that. Because unlike Vector, I actually win fights.”

Just…Everything. Just me, Vex and our boy against the crazy world. Eventually the crackhouse became a crackhome. More cases poured in with time, we got furniture, and with everything going on, we eventually made a name for ourselves. Our little guy is growing up happy and loved.” 

“Two nineteen year old jackasses and a baby bee,” Espio repeated fondly. He handed back the vape to Shadow. 

“Wow.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to get all nostalgic on you,” Espio said. “It’s fresh on my mind because of his birthday. And honestly, it always is during this type of weather. Hard not to think about it…Especially now.”

“No need to apologize. I’m glad I learned it. Did Charmy’s parents try to reach out?”

“About that…We might have a case again. A pretty serious one,” Espio said. Hesitated briefly. “I shouldn’t—”

“Hey.” Shadow looked at him. “What’s going on?”

“So uh—Anora—the social worker called us and I thought it was just a status check. She always checks in every couple of months, see how we’re doing and if we need anything. Even though the case is done with and we have full adoption of our baby, she always sends Charm a little birthday gift. We were her first case on her FIRST day of work, and she became a friend. But…Charmy’s mom found out from the news that he was alive. And she wanted to see him. A little difficult when you’re in Prison Island for larceny.”

“Wait, WHAT?!”

“It was a dud at first, because we do keep him out of the public eye as much as we can. And we never really knew who she was…But the kid went to nationals for ice hockey, so everyone found out locally. I guess even that involves the slammer.”

“When did you find out?”

“Uh—Last week! Three hours before Charmy’s game! Me and Vector have been investigating like crazy while Charm’s at school. We are not telling him for obvious reasons. Normally, the little guy is part of the cases he can handle and the ones we feel appropriate for him. Now that we have more cases, for some reason, it’s been driving us up the wall. Good for keeping the lights on, but absolutely horrible timing.”

“What do you know of the mother?”

“Possibly a fake name. Dana Smith? I don’t know. It’s suspicious. But so much is sealed off. So much. I don’t know what to do at this point. A lot of that shit is sealed, and even the guys that know some guys who know some guys can’t quite crack through it.”

“Well, Prison Island is federal. I can talk to agents I tolerate in GUN,” Shadow suggested. “See what they can find out and pull a dossier together for us to work off of. Rouge might know something…”

“I’m telling her tonight, she caught a ride with me, Vex and Amy.”

“You should have told me.”

“I didn’t want to bother you. You have enough going on,” Espio said. At Shadow’s expression of confusion, he elaborated. “Sonic’s heart problems.”

“Who told you?”

“No one did. I’m a really good detective.”

“Not that good of a detective.”

“...Silver did. I heard that Sonic took a longer break from school. I remembered the group chat. Kind of connected the dots. And the rail accident was awful. It’s not easy to cope with that overnight.”

“I know that. And I appreciate that. But please know that Sonic is a lunatic and can take on a god while blindfolded. You know he lives for this shit. So, is it okay if I fill Sonic in? He will want to know everything about this.”

“Of course.” 

Espio’s phone went off. A quick glance showed that it was Vector. 

Vex, Shadow noted. With a heart. Vex 💚.

“Ah shit,” Espio groaned as he answered the call. “What?” Espio greeted flatly. “Yes, I’m alive. We’re fine. I’m outside—yes, Shadow is with me. We’re on the swings.” He rolled his eyes. “Yes, I know…Alright, fine, we’ll head back.” He hung up.

“That’s our cue?”

“Yes,” Espio sighed. “I don’t like parties. I’d rather be in bed.”

“Doubt I was missed at the party,” Shadow said dryly. 

“Why do you say that?”

“Tails still hates me. He thinks I’m not good enough for Sonic…Long story. Very long story. Another time.” 

"Don't underestimate Tails. He's different than you think. But yeah. Let's go deal with my stupid husband."

Inside the house, Espio lightly shoved the back of Vector’s head. “I’m back, you massive fucking douchebag.”

“Motherfucker, what took you so long?!” Vector greeted Espio. 

“None of your business, dicknips. Not like you were doing anything productive,” Espio replied. “Other than taking inventory of all the Michelobs.” He motioned to the empty beer cans on the table. “What are you, dehydrated?”

“Listen, you’re the one driving, asshole.”

“Regretfully.”

“Come play Uno with us.” 

So Shadow wandered off to where Sonic was sitting. 

Sonic looked up.

“There you are--Were you vaping?” He accused instantly.

Shadow froze. “How did you know?”

“You reek of strawberries.”

“I—”

“Babe,” Sonic said with a glare. The piercing kind that could glare through Shadow’s entire soul. The ‘mhm, that’s right, motherfucker, try lyin’ to me again’ kind. “Were you vaping?”

“Maybe.” Shadow tried to shrug it off. But it was difficult to do so. “Whatever. Don’t…worry about it.”

“Were you?”

“...Yes.”

“We’ve been over this!”

“I know—”

“Vaping is—”

“Bad for you, I know, I know, I know,” Shadow said. He was partly tempted to go back outside and vape again out of spite. “But I needed it to calm down. Not that you would know about that.”

The words were snippy, and Sonic blinked in shock at the tone.

“...Sorry,” Shadow said quietly. “Sorry. That was rude.”

“What happened?” Sonic asked. “I saw that Espio went outside to find you.”

“He did. We were catching up,” Shadow said. 

And also contraband vaping because Espio, too, vapes when he is incredibly stressed out and is currently hiding it from Vector… We gotta kick the habit.

“And? Everything okay?”

“Espio filled me in on some…troubling matters. I’ll tell you later.”

“You can tell me now.”

“No. It’s Tails’s birthday,” Shadow said, with a neutral tone of finality that he hoped wasn’t hostile to Sonic. “...I don’t want to ruin the occasion more than I already have.”

“I—” Sonic ran a hand across his chin. Thought about it. Fast, quick, calculated. Then he finally sighed. “Okay.” He nodded. Resigned. “...Are you okay, though?”

Shadow simply sighed.

Instead of saying anything, Sonic reached down and held his hand. 

Shadow held it back.

They cut the cake. Sonic ended up playing another game of Uno.

Shadow needed air. He made himself some coffee and added more shots of espresso.

He went outside and...

At the party, Shadow found Tails outside. Uh oh.

“Hey.”

Tails had grown a few centimeters in the last two years. He is nineteen now. Protective as ever. 

“Hey.”

“What...What has you out here?”

“I'm tired,” Tails said bluntly. He held up his...ginormous cup of coffee. 

At Shadow's surprise, Tails kind of laughed. “Dude, I sleep like a baby with this. I have ADHD. This does nothing.” 

“I should have not punched you,” Tails said quietly. Voice neutral and shame in his tone. Though whether he felt ashamed of his actions was one possibility that Shadow ruled out.

“Hm.”

“I did not know you were the one who brought Sonic to the hospital.”

“So, who told you?”

“Vanilla.”

“He was with me on campus when it happened.”

“Still.”

“Bringing him on foot was faster than an ambulance.”

“Right.”

Shadow thought of Rouge’s ironic advice that if he did not have anything nice to say, he should not say it at all. 

So he remained quiet. Maybe that was enough of an answer for him.

“Are you going to say anything?”

“What else is there to say?” Shadow asked. 

I don’t exactly forgive you because it truly hurt like hell. But I don’t…exactly blame you.

Shadow huffed out a breath. “Look. I am not one to give a lecture on what is right and wrong. Especially considering the fact that we have…been violent with one another.” Roundhouse kicks and all. “But face the facts that you are almost an adult and you should know better.” He really wished he was home right now. 

“That’s a lecture in of itself.”

“Hmph. But know that I would not hurt Sonic.” I love him too much. 

“You don’t have a good track record on that.”

“Things change. People change…Feelings change. And I love him, but I know you don't like me. And I'm okay with that. I respect that.”

“It's not that I don't like you. It's that you don't even try to know me.”

“Excuse me?”

“You don't even try to get to know me!”

“Because you hate me.”

“I've tried to get to know you, but all you do is avoid me! Sonic keeps saying you're approachable, but all I get is everything otherwise.”

“I'm still working on being social. But I don't hate you. You're Sonic’s family. I never could hate you. I just keep a respectful distance because I know I must earn your trust.”

“Avoiding me isn't the answer either.”

“So what is?”

“I don't know!” Tails exclaimed. “All I know is that my brother almost died, everyone tried to keep it a secret, and I had to find out through Amy about what happened because you wouldn't say anything. Everyone treated me like a kid! So tell me; why didn't you tell me the truth?”

“It wasn't my decision.”

“What?”

“I lied.”

“What do you mean?”

“It was Sonic’s.” Shadow watched as the hurt he dreaded for so long crossed Tails’s features. “Sonic told me not to tell you. But I lied and said it was my choice. I did not want your relationship with him to be ruined. I am so sorry.”

“...This isn’t the first time he’s done this. Sonic is not perfect,” Tails said with a sigh. “I should have known. But...It's fine, I guess. I'm sorry. I'll talk about it later with him, but it won't ruin my relationship with him. He's my brother. And it won't ruin my party. What, you think you're that special? You are insecure. But...I can see what you tried to do.”

“Uh. What do you mean?”

“Shadow, you are the most insecure person I know. You think you're cold, and broody, and unfeeling, but, you're not. You're literally a school teacher. All Sage talks about with me is how much she loves you and what she learns from you. Cream loves you with her entire heart. You're a good guy, dude. About time you realized it.”

“Uh...Thank you. I appreciate that. I didn't know...I had to hear it.”

“Do you...want to take a walk?” Shadow asked cautiously. 

“Yeah. I would like that. I won't punch you this time.” Tails snorted a little bit at Shadow's surprised gasp. And laughed. "Dude, the look on your face!"

Shadow should have figured that Tails got the snark from Sonic.

But he tucked his scarf tighter around him and walked down next to Tails on the snow covered side walk, once more, to the swing set. It was a nice night. 

He supposed he deserved the fist of snow thrown at his head.

He'll let the little guy have it.

It's his birthday.