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Civilians don't like him, it is something that is becoming increasingly clear.
Izuku gets it, really. He poses a danger to everyone's safety simply by being in UA with them. No matter how impenetrable fortress it pretends to be, UA is just a high school with a suspiciously high public budget and a principal with more connections than anyone should have.
Troy was also thought impenetrable, and what was left of it?
Izuku trusts his teachers, he trusts Nedzu, but he doesn't trust his luck, and every minute he spends around all those people is a minute he challenges that luck.
Internally he laughs. Izuku trusts his teachers. It's something he never thought he'd genuinely say, or even consider . All the teachers he has had have proven to have the reliability of a villain with a hostage. It was better to try to solve anything on his own than to think about going to a teacher.
From his kindergarten teacher, with her nervous smile and her not-so-obvious dislike for him, as if he were going to transmit quirklessness to his classmates, to his middle school teacher, who in addition to allowing bullying, he encouraged it. .
Izuku has had few teachers who crossed physical limits, but he has had them, and they have left their mark.
To think that he now trusts his teachers, with his life , is a strange feeling. Rewarding, but strange.
Izuku would die for Aizawa and All Might. It scares him, in a way, but he can't help but feel happy about it. Not because he is happy to die, obviously, but because he would be happy knowing that his death has meant the life of someone else, theirs.
Save to win, All Might called it.
Pretty accurate.
Izuku is on his morning run, trying to regain his training pace after the rest recommended (mandated) by Recovery Girl so he could recover his body from the wear and tear he subjected it to for one month, trying to hold the world on his shoulders.
Normally his training routines start much earlier, but there are some schedules that do not allow him to get up at 5 in the morning to go running. So here he is, at 8 in the morning, half an hour after the curfew broke, trying to recover a little endurance after spending the rest of last week resting.
There are about 5 days left until Shigaraki is ready, with whatever that entails.
Every day that passes, it becomes clearer. He'll save that boy, no matter what.
And if the only way to save him is to kill him, so be it.
His train of thought is interrupted by another civilian who gives him a cautious look, not unlike the one the other three civilians he has encountered in the ten minutes he has been running have given him before.
As has been said, they tolerate his stay, they do not approve of it. As if he were the intruder in their house and not the other way around.
At least the looks remain on that, caution. He doesn't think he can stand being looked at with the contempt with which they looked at him when they saw him arrive last week. His mental state is delicate at best. If Izuku starts having middle school flashbacks now he would become completely useless in the war.
Izuku's logical and very literal mind also tells him that he is overstepping the limits, the conditions under which they let him in in the first place. Come in, take a bath, take a nap and leave . They don't want him here and he understands it.
But Aizawa is right, All Might is right, his classmates are right. If he had continued as he was, spinning like a mill, destroying his body for the greater good, he was going to end up dead.
He probably would have ended up dead if Kacchan hadn't found him when he did. He wasn't going to use his quirk against controlled civilians. He didn't have the strength to do it either.
"Big Bro Midoriya!"
Izuku stops and looks back, where the very familiar voice calls out to him. Before he can fully turn around, he has a five-year-old little earthquake clinging to his leg like a limpet.
"Kota." He responds, simply as acknowledgment.
Before he can move to properly greet him, the boy begins to climb him. When Izuku notices, Kota hangs on his back instead of his leg and hugs him from behind. It would even choke him a little if he wasn't used to Eri's near-death grips.
"Ugh. You're all sweaty."
"I was running ."
"Kota! Be gentler! It's rude to jump on people."
Izuku looks back again, seeing this time how Mandalay runs a little suffocated toward them, probably chasing Kota. In response to his aunt's scolding, the boy simply clings tighter to his shirt.
"I don't care, Mandalay-san. It's okay."
"Call me Sosaki, Midoriya. I'm not on duty right now." The professional heroine answers, dismissing his comment with a wave of her hand. "Get off Midoriya, Kota. Come on."
"No." The boy buries his face in his neck, causing the collar of the PE uniform Izuku is wearing to cover him.
Sosaki sighs. "Midoriya was training, Kota. You can't interrupt him like that." Izuku simply watches the exchange between aunt and nephew, completely oblivious and unfazed.
"Big Bro Midoriya doesn't care." The boy answers, his voice muffled by his neck.
"Even if he doesn't," the heroine argues, "it's not right to jump on people like that."
Izuku laughs a little when he feels the sigh that Kota gives on his neck, causing him to tickle. Consequently, the little boy laughs too, blowing again to continue tickling him.
"You're not helping, Midoriya." Sosaki's tone is serious, but there's an underlying fondness that tells Izuku that she's not angry.
"Sorry, sorry." Izuku, as best he can, grabs Kota from his back and puts him down, the boy continues laughing like a small hellspawn still on the ground. His sharp features make him look too much of an imp for his own good.
"Again, I'm sorry." Sosaki approaches his nephew, placing a hand on his head and subtly forcing him to bow. "Apologize too."
Kota tries to remove her hand from his head without success, so he resigns himself to muttering a small "I'm sorry" while bowing no more than three centimeters.
"No need, really." Izuku says again, waving his hands.
"I have to teach him manners." Sosaki says again, and Izuku thinks she has a point.
"Anyway, did you want anything?" The student asks, stopping his watch when he realizes that he has been stopped for longer than he can memorize to recover it on the run.
"No. Kota just saw you and wanted to say hello."
The boy seems to have lost a little bit of shame when his aunt outs him in front of Izuku, like what happened with the shoes. Maybe the little show he put on when he arrived changed something in the boy. Izuku doesn't want to worry him, but he won't deny that he's a little happy that Kota is allowing himself to be more open with him.
“Well, hello there, Kota.”
Izuku smiles as much as he can. He is more relaxed since the mirror accident and feels like he can smile genuinely now. It's still difficult for him, anyway, the coming battle is a constant weight on his brain. The man he has to kill and the child he has to save appear every time he closes his eyes and do not allow him to rest.
But there, seeing Kota's smile, the sparkle in his eyes and the absolute trust that the boy places in him makes the student's heart warm. He doesn't regret going up the mountain when he did, or breaking his arms like he did.
Saving Kota was worth it, and he would make the same decisions over again.
He can't help but let his eyes wander over the child, stopping definitively on the red shoes. They are not exactly the same as his, mainly because his are custom made.
Losing the extra joint in the little finger through human evolution inevitably translates to a change in the shape of the foot. The little finger is generally much lower than the rest of the fingers and mobility is reduced to moving it up and down. People who do not have the extra joint cannot bend their little finger.
The fashion industry had to evolve with the human being, supplying all the new characteristics that people began to develop. The heteromorphs and mutants alone broke the minds of many companies to find ways to make clothes adapted to the wings or boots that adapted to the animal legs that many people have. In addition, materials resistant to fire, acid, water and an endless variety of elements are the order of the day.
All this means, therefore, that the majority of the textile industry left out quirkless people, which is not a big problem. For the most part, a quirked person and a quirkless person look practically the same.
Except, that is, in the foot joint.
Izuku does not want to ignore the discrimination that heteromorphs suffer today, when Shoji opened up to them about how hard his childhood was, he wanted nothing more than to burn his friend's town to the ground, destroy the bird cage that kept him locked up all this time. Izuku is, by nature, an empathetic and sensitive boy, if you add to that the emotional factor of having suffered discrimination in his flesh, you have a very efficient time bomb waiting to explode the system.
It's precisely the reason why he wants to be a hero, to help people like him. He wants to be there for the people no one was with.
But returning to the topic, even if it is true that systematic oppression against heteromorphs (even more so against those whose forms barely present human features) exists and is a real problem, the abundance of mutations is too great for companies to ignore their existence and ostracize them.
Which does not happen, obviously, with quirkless people.
Two years ago, 20% of humanity was quirkless, approximately 1.6 billion people did not have a quirk. The latest reports, however, show that, unlike 2 years ago, where 1 in 5 children were born without a quirk, there is now a downward trend.
In the last 6 months, 1 in 20 children were born without a quirk. Or in other words, if this trend continues, only 5% of those born will be quirkless. Four times less than the current percentage, which was maintained for many years. As the former successors said, it is very likely that he is the last wielder of the OFA. If things continue as expected, by the time he turns 60, no quirkless children will be born.
He doesn't know whether to feel relieved or not.
So yes, companies see no real benefit in producing shoes for quirkless people. Or, rather, they see it as a waste of resources to invest in them. Only a few companies take the trouble (or the profit) to produce shoes that fit the shape of his foot, and obviously, due to low demand, the shoes are expensive .
Why was he thinking all this, again?
"Midoriya?" Sosaki's voice brings him out of his thoughts. He looks at Kota and the heroine and sees that they are giving him slightly worried looks.
"Oh." Izuku's genuinely surprised expression makes Mandalay relax a little. "Sorry, I spaced out."
"Are you okay?" Kota asks hesitantly.
"Yeah." Izuku answers, honestly. "It happens to me a lot, I get distracted by my thoughts and I just disconnect."
"Well." Kota seems hesitant, but doesn't insist.
Izuku looks at his watch again and realizes that he's been stopped for too long to regain his pace, so he simply decides that he'll spend a little more time doing Crossfit today and abandon the race he was on. He's run 20 minutes, enough to count as a warm-up, he'll make it up on the treadmill at some point.
He will take advantage of the gym that the complex has, grouping so many hero students in an intra-school residential area meant providing them with a gym for their regular workouts. Gym that is open all day, all week. Nedzu was a little strict about curfew, but he understood that a group of traumatized children have some nights when they can't sleep and prefer to let off steam by getting some exercise. So breaking curfew is implicitly allowed if you're at the gym.
"I'm going back to the rooms. I am cold down." Izuku informs, especially in case there is anything else Sosaki or Kota wants, out of courtesy more than anything.
The training hero watches as Mandalay nudges Kota lightly, the underlying "I told you" making Izuku laugh.
"I am sorry brother." The boy this time apologizes genuinely, without the familiar threat of his aunt. "I didn't want to interrupt you for so long." The pout he makes almost makes Izuku melt right there of cuteness.
"It's not entirely your fault, I got more distracted than I intended before." Izuku dismisses the apology, making sure the little boy understands that he has nothing to worry about. "I'll go to the gym later and that's it."
"Don't overexert yourself." Sosaki tells him with a smile.
"It seems like everyone has taken a liking to telling me that."
"Now I think I know why Aizawa keeps calling you Problem Child."
Izuku blushes at that. It's one thing for Aizawa to say it directly to him as an affectionate nickname, and another for him to actively refer to him that way with his friends. It doesn't bother him, but he is embarrassed that the professional heroes he admires are left with an unruly image of him.
Aizawa gives him very little credit, although Izuku hasn't done much to prove that the nickname is completely unfounded either.
"There is nothing to be ashamed of, Midoriya. We know that you take your responsibilities seriously." Sosaki tries to relax him a little when she sees him turn as red as a tomato from embarrassment. "He means it lovingly, I swear."
"I know he means it lovingly." Ah, sweet stutter, didn't Izuku miss it? "It's just embarrassing, he's my teacher."
"You could be his son by now, with all he talks about you."
And that makes Izuku the perfect imitation of a ripe tomato ready to harvest. Knowing, internally, that Aizawa cares about him and has grown more fond of him than he should in a teacher-student relationship is one thing. Being confirmed that the man sees him as a son is another matter entirely.
And no matter how hard Izuku tries to pretend to be embarrassed because his teacher talks about him as if he were his son, inside his chest his heart is jumping with happiness knowing that the man he sees as his father figure feels the same way.
Izuku wouldn't have known what to do if at some point he called him "dad" as God intended and his teacher simply rejected him and told him that it was a limit he wasn't willing to cross.
But if other heroes noticed the connection, then that connection exists .
"Hehe, Big Bro looks like Muscular's butt."
"Kota!" Sosaki scolds, half horrified, half surprised. However, Izuku can notice the slightest hint of amusement that the heroine can't hide and which is reflected in a twitch at the corner of her lips.
Izuku may struggle with social relationships in general, but if there's one thing he’s good at, it's analyzing people.
As for Izuku himself, he lets out a huge laugh at Kota's comment, which inevitably makes him turn even redder. He brings her arms to his torso and hugs his chest as he leans in, a few tears gathering in the corners of his eyes.
Even though he is short of breath, with a satisfying pain spreading through his chest and stomach due to the contractions of laughing, he can hear how Kota, that little imp , laughs at his misfortune and at his own occurrence, satisfied with having made Izuku and his aunt laugh, no matter how much the latter tries to hide it.
What Izuku doesn't realize, however, is the looks that several civilians passing by begin to give them. It's early, yes, but the situation prevents many from sleeping properly, so it's not too far-fetched to see people walking around campus at 8 in the morning.
When Izuku calms down and controls his breathing again, he sees Mandalay's nervous grimace. He doesn't understand what's happening to the heroine until he hears it.
"Look at him. There, laughing , like he doesn't care about anything." The student freezes, looking at nothing but straight ahead, not daring to turn around.
"It seems that the nap and the bath have done him well ." The seemingly harmless comment is said with a malice and dislike that makes Izuku sick.
Before the familiar static settles in his ears, a product of the dissociation that comes from years of experience with hurtful and offensive comments, Sosaki takes charge of the situation, giving the two civilians a look usually meant only for villains. Many heroes end up developing an intimidating aura to overwhelm villains, probably the result of pure survival instinct. If your enemy is too scared to attack, you have an advantage .
With civilians it seems to work just as well. Izuku listens as they both make a pathetic and frightened noise at Sosaki's simple look. Izuku can also see how Kota frowns and walks over to him, taking the older boy's hand in a show of support.
Izuku isn't dissociating per se, but he's a little off, you might say. The fuss that was made when his class brought him back has been present in his brain like a fly orbiting the light. You know it's there, you look at it from time to time, you wonder if turning off the light would make it go away, but in the end you let it be because it's not bothering you. And that may be the problem, that Izuku doesn't find that memory bothersome.
On the contrary, like the selfless martyr that he is, Izuku treats that memory as a reminder. He is here out of pure civil benevolence and the efforts of Uraraka and his class. They let him stay here, and he repays them by abusing their hospitality. Izuku is a guest in his own house.
And the worst thing is that he can't help but feel that this is no longer his home.
"Big Bro?" Izuku looks at Kota when he calls him, the boy looks at him worried and squeezes his hand slightly.
"I'm fine." The older boy answers. His voice comes out flat and is barely a whisper, which only worries the boy, who looks at his aunt without knowing what to do.
"Come, sit." Sosaki takes him by the shoulder and guides him to a nearby bench. Izuku falls into it and gives a big sigh, looking up at the sky and closing his eyes.
He notices Kota sitting on his lap. Izuku instinctively places a hand on the boy's back so he doesn't fall.
"Do not worry about them." Sosaki tries to say, sitting down next to him, their arms almost touching. "They don't know what they're talking about."
"Do they?" Izuku answers, his voice a little shaky. "They let me in because they had no other choice. I doubt that all that crowd agreed to that."
"You shouldn't care what they think."
"They're the people I'm supposed to protect. I'm not saying they have to like me, but they should be able to trust me." To calm himself down, Izuku starts caressing Kota's back. The boy, for his part, decides to lie against Izuku, his head resting on his shoulder. "And I'm not even able to achieve that ."
"If we expected everyone to trust us, we would die waiting, Midoriya." The heroine rests a hand on his arm, just above his scar. "Civilian trust is earned through actions."
"Haven't I already done enough?" Izuku moves his hand to the back of Kota's neck and starts scratching his hair. "Haven’t I given enough?"
"You've done more than enough. Anyone with a little common sense can see that." Kota wraps his arms around Izuku's neck and hugs him. The green-haired young man hugs him back.
"I want to believe it." Izuku answers. "But at the same time I feel like they're right. They let me in for a nap and a bath, I feel like I'm abusing their hospitality."
"It’s your home, Midoriya."
"It doesn't feel like that."
The patrols are good. It's very different from the rogue act he had been doing all this time. Now he really has time to rest and eat, he is not on the verge of death every 2 days or on the verge of anaphylactic shock from all the dust accumulated from the rubble.
Yes, Midoriya Izuku is allergic to dust, like 50% of the population, deal with it.
He would like to patrol in his hero suit, it's the only thing he can reproach the patrols. Guarding his zone and occasionally fighting in the gym uniform isn't difficult or extremely uncomfortable, but it's not as resistant to his quirk as his costume, so Izuku is accumulating more uniform spares than he'd like.
He tries to repair them when he can and they are small tears, often with the help of Sero, the boy is surprisingly agile with a needle and thread.
"I designed the first prototype of my suit by hand because I couldn't wait to enter UA to have it."
Izuku laughs at the memory, he loves hearing every detail of his friends' lives. And consequently he loves to listen to them talk about their tastes and hobbies.
"What's so funny?" Kacchan's voice brings him out of his thoughts.
They were together this time. All the students of class 1A (now 2A, Izuku remembers) have been scattered around Yokohama, and conveniently Izuku and Katsuki have had to hang around Kamino, near the vandalized statue of All Might, where their class managed to bring him back .
"Just remembering." He answers, without giving it too much importance.
They are not very far from each other. They are on the main street, if they walk a few more blocks they would reach where the screen on which they saw All Might defeat All For One rests.
Assuming the screen is still there, of course.
Anyway, they are taking everything in stride. They have no direct orders to search for and hunt villains, which is what Izuku had dedicated himself to. But simply to go around their jurisdiction a couple of times, bring any straggling civilian to the UA and, if they found a villain, defeat them and hand them over to the police. Izuku isn't too worried about that last bit. He and Katsuki make a good team, they wouldn't have much trouble defeating any gun that AFO sends after him.
"Care to share?" Katsuki asks, almost whispering, no kind of underlying threatening tone, nor any trace of anger.
Izuku is genuinely and truly surprised. His childhood friend seems like a completely different person when he's this relaxed. No bitter tone, no growls, not even the "die" that usually accompanies most of his phrases.
Evidently he hasn't changed enough to not recognize him. He has relaxed noticeably, but still has an offensive personality and a strong character. When he wants to prove his point he still has that threatening aura, but it's no longer suffocating, it's simply the strong aura that the blonde emanates. He's not going to ask for pears from the elm, Katsuki is making an effort and Izuku appreciates that.
But he continues to be surprised by the change.
"Just Sero helping me sew the uniform." To prove his point, Izuku raises his right arm and points to a stitched tear that runs from his armpit to his pectoral. Katsuki is far away, but not far enough away to miss the cut.
"Since when does Flat Face know how to sew?"
Izuku snorts with laughter at the nickname. This is exactly what he means when he says that Katsuki has relaxed but hasn't changed. Using nicknames is a kind of display of affection for him, when he's not actively using it as a derogatory insult, that is. Although most of their nicknames begin with that offensive purpose, somehow everyone gets used to them and receives them with affection.
It was not the case with "Deku", but it was the case with the rest. Izuku is happy that Kacchan is still the same old wickhead.
Please, don't tell him he called him that.
"Ask him when you see him."
Katsuki seems to want to respond to the obvious sass in his response. But he decides to keep his mouth shut and give him an offended scowl instead.
"Don't give me that face, I'm doing it for you, so you can be more sociable."
"Since when are you better than me at that, nerd?"
Izuku snorts at the question, because Katsuki is evidently right about that. They are both shitty with social relationships, even if they are shitty for different reasons.
While Izuku doesn't know how to deal with people because he is constantly in a defensive state ready to run, Katsuki doesn't know how to deal with people because he is constantly in an offensive state ready to attack. Izuku's social insecurity comes from the bullying he was subjected to for years, and Katsuki's because he has anger issues as big as a piano coupled with a powerful and dangerous quirk, which makes it quite difficult for him to form genuine relationships that are not a product of the fear.
Izuku internally thanks that Kirishima is a ray of sunshine fallen from the sky. The teenager's carefree nature added to his hardening quirk were a perfect mix to enter directly into Katsuki's heart, who resigned himself to his company when he saw that the redhead supported his quirk and didn't care about dealing with his short temper.
Izuku, although also a ray of sunshine, couldn't stand them.
"I hate you." He doesn't mean it, obviously. If he couldn’t hate Katsuki when he was a piece of shit, there's no way he can hate him now.
"Keep telling yourself that." The blonde responds, kicking a rock.
There is a subsequent silence that Izuku would describe as awkward, although it may simply be his nervous nature and anxiety doing its thing. While they continue walking forward, they keep the distance between them. The OFA wielder feels like he could cut the tension between them with a knife. Internally he prays that something happens.
"Kacchan-" Izuku's call is interrupted by Katsuki himself, who doesn't bother to stop.
"You've gained weight."
Whatever Izuku expected, it certainly wasn't a comment like that.
"Uh..." His brain tries to process the blonde's comment. "Sato has been making sure I eat."
The only response he receives is a murmur. Katsuki keeps looking at the ground as he walks, hands in his pockets.
Izuku knows that Katsuki is not good at showing affection, much less having people noticing when he gives it. He likes people to take his signs of affection naturally, ignoring the fact that he doesn't give them often. The blonde prefers physical contact too, so words are not his strong suit.
But Izuku understands that, so he lets it be, even if the situation is anything but comfortable.
Silence returns and anxiety with it. Izuku is desperate to talk to his friend about everything. He can't help but feel like he’s running out of time.
One of the things he has learned during this time is that the world is grayscale, and that he must stay realistic .
A war is coming, hopefully the last one.
He doesn't expect to get out of it alive.
Now or never, then.
"Kacchan." The blonde still doesn't look at him, but Izuku knows he's listening. "Now what? I mean, us. What is... this?"
Izuku wants to go slow with this, walking on eggshells, practically. Kacchan is impulsive, but what is impulsive is also evasive. He does not like to talk about topics for which he is not prepared. If Izuku can stop himself from cornering him like a wounded animal, then he can stop him from jumping for his jugular.
The green-haired teenager has noticed, after 13 years of friendship, that Katsuki requires patience.
After a few minutes, in which they have stopped in their walk, Katsuki speaks. "No... I'm not sure I follow."
This time it's Izuku's turn to sigh. "The... The apology was nice, and I appreciate it, I really do. But where does that leave us? Where do we go from here?"
Izuku sees perfectly how Katsuki's face becomes serious, analyzing what the youngest has just told him.
"Where do you want it to go?"
The question takes Izuku by surprise, because he doesn't know. This is the reason why he started this conversation, because he doesn't know what he wants, he doesn't know what they are, he doesn't know where they are going.
But he knows where they come from.
"I don't know." He decides to go the sincere route. "If I'm honest, I prefer to let it flow and see where it takes us."
"But?"
"What?"
"I feel a ‘but’ here, nerd."
The tired laugh Izuku lets out makes Katsuki lean closer. He doesn't take many steps before stopping again.
"You're going to call me an idiot."
"I sure will if you don't tell me what's going on in that overthinking head of yours."
Izuku sighs again , because it's the only thing he can do. He looks around quickly, preferring to have this conversation sitting down. There isn't much to choose from. There is the support of a shattered shop window, rubble or the floor. In the end he decides on a particularly large piece of debris.
When he sits down, he notices that Kacchan does not imitate him, but does come closer to stand next to him. They are still separated by a meter or two, but it doesn't matter much.
"I don't know if we have time to let it flow."
He doesn't look at Katsuki when he says it, so Izuku doesn't know what face the blonde is making at his admission.
However, he hears it before Kacchan even opens his mouth.
"Idiot."
The laughter that runs through Izuku is genuine. Tired, but genuine. He just knew Kacchan was going to call him an idiot, it was too obvious.
"What? Are you scared? You think we're going to lose?"
"You know that's not what I mean."
"You make it sound like that."
Izuku rests his elbows on his knees and brings his hands together, beginning an irregular but constant movement. He caresses his palms, cracks his fingers, traces the contours of his scars. Doing things with his hands helps him stay focused, gives him a point of focus. It also helps calm his anxiety a little.
"I'm the first one who wants all this to turn out well."
"You do a hell of a job proving it, then."
Izuku clenches his hands a little tighter, the familiar crack coming from his knuckles relaxing him a little.
"Would you let me talk?"
"I don't know, would you stop talking bullshit?"
Izuku repeats to himself like a mantra that Katsuki needs patience, but he himself is running out. He doesn't know if the blonde is teasing him on purpose or if he is testing him. Whatever it is, it makes Izuku desperate.
"Could you shut your mouth for a moment and listen to me, for once in your life?"
That seems to throw Katsuki off, who certainly wasn't expecting the sudden aggressive tone to come out of Izuku's mouth.
"I want to believe that we are going to win and that we are going to solve all of this. I really want to believe that. But even if we do, I don't know if we will all make it. That's what scares me." The fire behind Izuku's eyes makes Katsuki's throat close up. "I want us all to get out of this alive, but I have to be realistic ."
After a few seconds of silence, Katsuki can't think of anything better to say. "Since when are you realistic?"
Izuku is not stupid, he knows exactly what the blonde means by that.
"Fuck off."
He gets up without giving the blonde time to answer. Izuku walks past him, making sure to bump into his shoulder and move him out of the way. Let him laugh at all the years he was dreaming of being a hero when he didn't have a quirk, yeah, right, no fucking way.
"Dek-! Izuku! I didn't mean it like that!" Katsuki catches up to him and grabs his wrist. Izuku releases his grip almost instantly.
"Yeah? And what was it supposed to mean? Oh great hero Dynamight? Supreme King of middle school?" Izuku spits out the name as if it stings his tongue.
He's not up to all this. His mental state is already delicate. He has to put up with a lot of people on a daily basis who would rather watch him rot bloodied in a random alley than let him take a bath or sleep in a real bed. Aoyama reminds him too much of himself and right now he's locked up as a traitor. His mother is on the verge of an anxiety attack every two minutes because she has a son who doesn't know how to take care of himself. And finally he has to be within reach of the expectations that everyone places on him, the successor of All Might, the next Symbol of Peace.
He's 16, for God's sake, he's allowed to break. He's allowed to not take shit from his middle school bully.
Katsuki's face is shocked at best. Izuku doesn't get angry unless he's fighting or sees an injustice flash before his eyes. But he doesn't get angry for himself .
"I..."
Izuku stands there, looking at him, waiting for an answer that he knows the blonde doesn't know how to give. As he said before, Katsuki is not good with words, he is not good at expressing himself. He is a man of action, not words. It's like forcing a soldier to fight with a pen.
"I'm waiting."
Katsuki frowns and clenches his teeth, as far as Izuku can tell by the slight clenching of his jaw.
"No... That's not why I said it." The words come out clumsy and slow, but they come out. "I've apologized so I don't make the same mistakes again. I'm not going to throw it away like that."
"So?"
The small blush that the blonde's cheeks take on tells Izuku that whatever he's going to say is something he would never admit out loud to anyone but him.
"You are not unrealistic because you are delusional. You are unrealistic because you are stubborn. You don't give up on what you believe is right." The older boy frowns as he looks away, his shoulders tense. "I've never seen you consider our possibilities before. It's all about taking action, trying, not giving up. That you, of all people, are negative about this is what makes it unreal."
As the teen speaks, Izuku gradually calms down. He's still a little pissed that Katsuki hasn't let him talk and jumped to conclusions, but he assumes that he just did the same thing, so he forces himself to push it away.
With a deep sigh, Izuku regains some composure. "I...I understand. Sorry for doubting you."
"I guess I deserve it."
A small sarcastic laugh leaves Izuku. "A little."
Izuku turns around completely and comes face to face with Katsuki. He's grown up, he realizes. Before, he had to raise his neck to look into the blonde's eyes, now that pronounced movement is nothing more than a slight lift of his chin. Kacchan towers over him 1 inch at most now.
The blonde also seems to notice it.
"I didn't say it that day because I collapsed." Izuku clenches his fists to focus on what he's saying.
"Hm?" Katsuki's look is still slightly uncomfortable. He still doesn't like having calm heart-to-heart conversations. He knows how to have them in full mental collapse.
"I forgive you. For everything."
Izuku doesn't need to see Katsuki's tears to know that he's crying. His friend lowers his head completely and stuffs the bottom half of his face into the collar of his suit. His untamable bangs cover his eyes. The only thing Izuku can see is his nose.
"No..." Katsuki bites his lip. "It was not necessary."
"Was it?" Izuku wants to move his hand and touch the blonde, but he holds back. "I think it was."
"Stupid nerd." Katski takes off one of the grenade-shaped gloves and scratches his eyes to wipe away the tears. "You know I don't like to cry."
"I don't know, I find it quite useful."
"That's because you cry too much , idiot."
Izuku laughs a little. "Will you let me explain myself now? I think it's my turn."
"Yeah, sure, whatever." He sobs.
"I don't want to lose anyone, Kacchan. I don't want anyone to die, but it's a war and people die." Izuku notices his hand shaking, he really needs physical touch right now, but he doesn't know if Katsuki is willing to give it to him. "There are so many things I want to do, so many moments I want to experience, so many places I want to go, so many people I want to meet. I don't want any of that to end."
As Katsuki is about to interrupt him, Izuku raises a hand to signal him to let him speak. The blonde obeys.
"I feel like I'm wasting my time being here, patrolling or whatever. Every minute I spend preparing for this war is a minute of my life I lose , which I could be spending doing all those things I want to do." Izuku swallows, drowning out the lump in his throat that is starting to form. "The problem is that I don't know how many minutes I have left, I don't know how many minutes I can keep spending. They could be my last, and I'll never know until it's too late."
Tears are now streaming down Izuku's cheeks, and he doesn't bother to hide them. They are not accompanied by screams or sobs, they are silent tears for a dead future.
"And everything extends to you." Katsuki doesn't make a shocked noise, but the hint is there. Opened eyes and a half-opened mouth are clear indicators. "I'm talking about me like I can be talking about you. We're here, patrolling a ghost district without knowing if this is the last thing we'll do. I don't know if I'll die and I don't know if you'll die. And I don't want to live in a world without you in it.”
"Izuku." Katsuki tries to interrupt him verbally this time, but the green-haired boy is too immersed in his own speech.
"I would give anything to have more time, but Shigaraki will be awake in 4 days and everything will begin and end with him. I am unable to concentrate, to enjoy anything because I constantly think that this will end, no matter what. And the only thing I want is time , but it's the only thing I don't have. Time for the class, for Aizawa, for All Might, for my mother, for you . Kacchan, I'm serious, I would give anything. I would give up on my dream if that means you'll stay -"
His speech, now almost senseless, is interrupted when 2 bare hands grab his face and force him to look into deep red eyes. Before it can sink in that Kacchan is touching him so gently, despite the calluses on his hands and the scars from the recoil of his explosions, the blonde presses his forehead to Izuku's.
“I haven’t gone yet. I’m still here.”
And stars may fall if that's not the only thing Izuku wanted.