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Chapter Text
Camila couldn’t remember the last time she’d been so happy on a day to day basis. Oh, sure, there’d been specific moments when she’d been happier – her wedding, the day of Luz’s birth, the day when she bludgeoned that bastard Belos to death with a baseball bat – but her average happiness was now higher than ever.
Life was so good for her right now. Her veterinary practice was in extremely high demand, renowned for its reputation for working miracles, almost as if it was magic. (Little did anyone know that it was magic – the Beast Keeping Guild had given her some extremely useful artifacts in gratitude for killing Belos once and for all.) This meant she was able to lead a much nicer lifestyle than she ever had. For the first time in ages, she’d been able to splurge on things like vacations and fancy meals.
Of course, her professional success paled in comparison to her personal success. She had a fabulous relationship with Luz now, in sharp contrast to the fraying one she’d had before she went to the Boiling Isles. It was still nerve-wracking every time Luz went through the portal to spend her weekdays in the Demon Realm, but the fact she was surrounded by people who cared about her and that she still spent weekends with Camila eased her mind. The Demon Realm had really done Luz a lot of favors (though certainly, Luz could have done with the massive trauma it dumped on her as well.) Luz had gained maturity and perspective, but not at the cost of losing the inimitable spark that was such an integral part of her soul.
And then there was Vee. It had been a struggle at first to see Vee as a member of her family, especially with the abrupt way her presence had been revealed. A part of her was still angry at being tricked, though she knew most of that anger was truly stemming from her guilt at falling for the deception in the first place. But as time went on, Camila became more and more used to having the basilisk in her house and thinking of her as her daughter. Now the idea of thinking of this snake creature as anything but her wonderful daughter was just inconceivable.
It was lovely seeing Vee come out of her shell (thankfully only metaphorically) and become more bold and assertive when it came to claiming her new identity. With Luz participating in a “foreign exchange program” (thanks in large part to Eda’s ex-husband’s skill with forging documents) Vee was able to slip in as Luz’s “cousin.” Vee was now quite well regarded and popular and even seemed to becoming friends – or perhaps more than friends, if Camila’s instincts were correct – with the head cheerleader.
Yes, everything was coming up roses for Camila. And speaking of roses, her favorite holiday, Valentine’s Day was here! After Antonio had died, Camila had been a wreck emotionally. Luz was hardly much better. Perhaps even worse because her young age made her struggle to understand the ramifications of her father dying. But she saw that her mother was in a terrible state and always took it upon herself to cheer her up. On the Valentine’s Day after Antonio’s death, Luz gave her a handwritten note saying that she’d be her mami’s new Valentine. It was the sweetest thing anyone had ever done for her. Every year since then, they’d made it their mission to write heartfelt cards to one another. In a way, Valentine’s Day was a second Mother’s Day for the Noceda family, and Camila was particularly looking forward to this one because it was the first one she’d spend with her second daughter.
“What’s got you in such a good mood?” Eric, her receptionist, said as Camila practically skipped into her workplace on Valentine’s Day morning. “Someone cast a spell on you?” Eric had been clued into the supernatural goings on when Belos attacked her workplace, leaving Eric with a broken arm and Belos with a terminal case of bashed open skull.
“Ah, there’s no more powerful spell than the joy of parenthood, my friend,” Camila said with a grin. “True, there’s always ups and downs, but it’s always worth it in the end.”
“That’s really sweet,” Eric said. “No special guy or gal in your life to share today with?”
Camila’s face tightened a little. She had barely admitted it to herself – she certainly wasn’t about to admit it to Eric – but there was a special woman she had a crush on: Luz’s second mother Eda. Eda was not only a powerful witch who could turn into a harpy (which Camila, embarrassingly, was very into) but loved Luz with all her heart, wasn’t afraid of anything, and was, quite literally, supernaturally beautiful. But there was an insurmountable obstacle: She was already in a relationship. And even if Camila was inclined to compete with the charming, talented, and very attractive Raine Whispers, which she most definitely was not, there would no way she’d ever top them.
“Sorry, sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything,” Eric said hurriedly, mistaking her silence for offense. “Oh, hey, speaking of romance, we got a package from you from a secret admirer.” He handed a fairly bulky package over to her. There was a card attached to it.
Camila took the package into her office. She had no idea who could have sent it to her. She certainly wasn’t in a relationship right now, nor had she been on a date for at least a year. She ripped open the card and read it.
To Camila,
You are the most beautiful woman in any world. You have a heart of gold and love that overflows to cover everything around you. You deserve a gift far more grand and regal than the one within this box, but hopefully it will suffice. You deserve not only the world, but all the worlds in all the infinite multiverse.
With fond regards,
Your secret admirers
Camila could feel her cheeks heating up. Whoever had sent her this letter, they were certainly a smooth talker! Camila was not the type to go on dates with random people who sent her gifts, but the sheer passion that had gone into this card meant she was considering making an exception.
With an eagerness she’d not felt about anything romantic since Antonio died, she opened up the box, only to scream in absolute horror. Inside the box was a blood-covered heart. What sort of depraved maniac could have sent her something so creepy and disgusting?
*****
Eda watched from the bushes outside Camila’s office building as she read the card attached to the package she’d sent her. It had taken her a long while to admit to them that she had a crush on Luz’s biological mother. She was very scared Raine would take it the wrong way, would think they weren’t enough for her. Which was very much not the case! She loved Raine with all her heart and all her soul, enough to marry them, something she didn’t do for just anyone (Stan being the exception that proved the rule).
Admitting that she had a crush on Camila to herself had been much easier. It was so incredibly obvious that it’d taken a Lilith level of self-delusion to deny it, something she just was not capable of. The human was stunningly beautiful, had killed Belos, had a passion that shined through her every action, yet was also kind and generous to a fault. It was frankly surprising more people didn’t have a crush on her.
Eda had thought she’d end up keeping her feelings for Camila locked deep in her soul for the rest of her life, only for them to slip out during a drinking contest with Raine. Much to her shock, not only did her spouse approve of bringing Camila into their relationship, but they also had a crush on her, albeit not one quite as intense as Eda’s own infatuation.
“I still say we should have gone with the original plan,” Eda sulked. Hunting down a bobcat in the Human Realm and cutting out its heart was fine, but the original plan would have been more satisfying.
“Sending her the heart of that crazy conspiracy theorist would be fine by demonic mores, but by human mores, it’d be murder, Eda,” Raine reminded her. “Remember, Camila’s culture is different than ours. We have to compromise a little.”
“What if I turn him into a flea?” Eda suggested, somewhat desperately. “A harmless little flea. And then I’ll put that flea in a box, and then I’ll put that box inside of another box, and then I’ll mail that box to myself, and when it arrives, I’LL FEED IT TO HOOTY!!!!”
Raine raised an eyebrow. “You really need to stop asking King for advice.”
“Look!” Eda said pointing at the window. “She’s blushing! She likes the letter! It’s really happening! She’s gonna be our girlfriend!”
The two of them watched with bated breath as Camila opened the box and then with dismay as she let out an earsplitting shriek and proceeded to faint. “This may be harder than we thought,” Eda conceded.
*****
“So…” Gus said, and then trailed off when he couldn’t think of a single thing to say.
“So,” Skara echoed.
Gus sighed. He never should have let Luz talk him into this. Sometimes, the only way to deal with his overexuberant friend was to just surrender to the inevitable and let her get her way, but he really should have fought back harder before he let her set him up on a blind date. Luz meant well, she really did, but her obsession with shipping often meant she overlooked important details, like the existence of reality. She was just so keen on getting Gus in a relationship so he’d not be the only member in their friend group without a significant other anymore.
Things had gotten even more awkward when it turned out the girl she had set him up with was none other than his teammate Skara. Gus certainly was no believer in inter-team romantic fraternization like Willow and Hunter were. Dating Skara would have been a disaster for everyone involved. But there was more to it than that. He not only felt nothing romantically for Skara, but he never felt romantic feelings for anyone.
But damn it, Luz’s puppy dog eyes were a force of nature sometimes and Gus was only witch in the end, so he’d shown up at the eye scream parlor for the most awkward conversation he’d had with anyone in a while.
“Skara, I’m sorry,” Gus said, “but this isn’t working out.” He winced. He certainly had no desire to offend his friend, but the truth needed to be said. “I mean, I want to still be friends with you obviously, but this dating thing is…not working at all.”
Skara breathed a sigh of relief. “Oh, thank the Titan. I thought I was gonna have to break your heart or something. Yeah, you’re a nice guy, Gus, but you’re not the guy for me. No butterknifeflies in the stomach, know what I mean?”
“Not really,” Gus admitted. “That’s not really a thing that happens to me. Somedays, I think there may be something wrong with me. I’ve gone through witch puberty – shouldn’t I be interested in romance by now?”
“No, no,” Skara said. “Actually, I was reading something about this in one of those pamphlets Luz gave me. Hang on, I think I still have it in my backpack.” She pulled out a slightly crumpled pamphlet and handled it over to Gus. “See, it’s called being aromantic!”
A huge smile came on Gus’s face. Not only was he not strange or odd, but there was even a name for people like him in the Human Realm. This had really made his day! “This is an awesome Valentine’s Day gift, Skara! Thanks!”
“Happy to help,” Skara said. “Well, since the dating thing didn’t work out, wanna go shopping as friends? I love this Valentine’s Day stuff – I thought we’d buy some gifts for the team to show them how much they mean to us.”
“Sounds like a plan!”
The two of them walked towards Bonesborough’s marketplace, all awkward feelings between them now dispelled, and started shopping for the perfect gifts. It was nice to see life getting back to normal after the trauma of the Day of Unity and the horror that the Collector’s reign of terror had been. Thankfully, King had been able to unlock his titanic powers and turn the Collector into a witch baby, who had been adopted by a very happy couple who vowed to treat them as their own child. With the Isles prospering under the leadership of King (and actual power wielded by Prime Minister Steve), life had never been better for the people of Bonesborough.
After several very successful hours of shopping, they’d gotten ideal gifts for everyone on the team. Gus was particularly excited about getting a new makeup kit for Hunter, who had first gotten into makeup to hide his scars, only to discover a great passion for the practice. Willow was certainly in favor of his makeup – she often wore a blush to rival one of Amity’s whenever he trotted out a particularly neat looking new look. Gus was just happy his friend was able to be himself now.
As had often been occurring these last few weeks, ever since Hunter learned of Valentine’s Day, Gus was able to find him working in Mr. Kudzu’s workshop in his backyard. Viney’s parents had eagerly adopted Hunter after his return to the Demon Realm; since Mrs. Kudzu was a social worker specializing in working with troubled youth, it seemed an ideal fit. Though frankly, Hunter seemed to get along with Mr. Kudzu better, finding his stoic but kind attitude to be extremely comforting. The two of them had bonded over Mr. Kudzu’s love of woodworking. It was a bit strange for a hobby given that Hunter was himself largely made of wood, but, hey, Gus wasn’t the judging type.
Whatever Hunter was working on, it was a huge secret. Not even Flapjack knew what it was; Hunter wouldn’t even let him into the workshop when he was working. Mr. Kudzu didn’t know either and neither did Viney. Gus was pretty sure it was going to be a present for Willow, though, and Hunter was just taking “operational security” way too far. Old habits were hard to break, after all, Hunter had so many issues that one just had to pick one’s battles sometimes.
Gus knocked on the door of the workshop. After a few seconds, Hunter came out and slammed the door behind him before Gus could see a single detail of whatever Hunter was working on. He looked over at Skara, but she shook her head. She hadn’t seen anything either.
“How did your date go?” Hunter asked.
“Crashed and burned as I suspected,” Gus said blithely, then realized he’d made a miscalculation when Hunter directed a dangerous glare at Skara. “It’s not her fault! I’m just not the dating type. In fact, I’m aromantic! Not into anyone.”
“Luz is going to be disappointed,” Hunter mused. “But on the other hand, she is a fan of people embracing their identities. If I were you, I’d lean into this revelation of self-discovery.”
Gus held up the package. “I got a gift for you for Valentine’s Day! Uh, I don’t know what you’ve heard, but contrary to popular belief in the Human Realm, it’s not just a day about romance, but also love in other forms like familial and platonic!”
“I couldn’t really figure out what to get you,” Skara admitted, “so I got you a gift certificate for Bed, Bath, and Beyond the Knowable Realms of Existence!” She gave him the certificate with a sheepish grin.
Hunter looked very pleased. “I have been wanting to get some new towels. Luz says that the mark of a put together person is always knowing where one’s towel is, so this is a perfect opportunity.”
Hunter put the certificate in his pocket and opened Gus’s gift. His eyes lit up when he saw the makeup equipment. “Oh, Gus, this is one of the nicest things anyone’s ever gotten for me,” he said, and hugged Gus. “You’re such a good friend.”
“So since I’m such a good friend, maybe you can repay me with a hint about what you’re working on?”
Hunter laughed. “All I’ll say is that it’s a very special present for the most important person in my life.” Aw, that was so sweet! So it was a present for Willow after all! “Yeah, he’s really gonna love it.”
He walked into the workshop and then quickly closed the door behind him once more. “HE?!” Gus and Skara said at the same time.
*****
Camila was at the end of her rope. The gifts from her “secret admirer” were getting more and more disturbing. They included dead roses, dead animals with their guts torn out, guts from what appeared to be those aforementioned animals, and poems waxing rhapsody about all the horrifying ways they’d kill her many enemies. The police had been of no help whatsoever, and frankly the fact that Camila had gone to them at all was a sign of how desperate she was feeling. With a basilisk daughter, she had a vested interest in staying off the radar of law enforcement as much as possible.
She was seriously considering buying a gun just in case she needed to defend herself. Camila was not a violent woman – Belos being a well deserved exception – but she was starting to become genuinely afraid her stalker would try to kill her. When she’d mentioned this in vague terms to Eda in passing – just mentioning that someone was giving her trouble – Eda promised to turn into the Harpy Beast and eviscerate anyone who dared harm her. Camila was so touched by this that she, for one wild second, was tempted to just throw caution to the wind and kiss Eda. Thankfully, she didn’t do that. It would have been especially bad because Raine happened to be present.
With Valentine’s Day approaching, she was growing more and more tense and anxious to the point where even Luz was starting to notice, and Luz, for all her manifold positive qualities, was not the world’s most perceptive individual. But why shouldn’t she be afraid? After all, it was only logical her stalker would try to contact her on Valentine’s Day. But Luz was able to sooth her and offer her comfort as well as promises of bloody vengeance if anyone dared lay a finger on her. The latter was as sweet as it was disturbing, in Camila’s opinion. And, of course, Luz’s annual Valentine card for her definitely uplifted Camila.
When the doorbell rang on Valentine’s Day afternoon, Camila nearly had a heart attack. Thankfully for her nerves, it turned out to be just Amity, in town for a special Valentine’s Day date with her girlfriend.
“I’m not ready yet!” Luz called out in a stage whisper from her bedroom. “Stall her!”
Camila chuckled to herself. “Well, you heard your girlfriend. How would you like me to stall you?”
“Could you tell me if you think Luz will like my outfit?” Amity said, her voice insecure.
“Frankly, cariño, you could wear that otter suit Luz was so fond of and she’d like you. But I think you look very nice, Amity.”
Amity looked profoundly relieved. “Oh, I’m so happy to hear that. I’ve just been so nervous all day. I know what an important day this is in human culture. How have you been doing?”
Camila sighed. “Not all that well.” Ordinarily, she’d be reluctant to tell Amity about her stalker problem, but Luz was going to tell her anyway, despite (or maybe because) Camila had specifically told her not to.
As she listed the extremely disturbing things that had happened to her, something very strange happened. Amity got a dreamy expression on her face, as if she was listening to someone discuss something romantic. “Oh, you are so lucky, Mrs. Noceda,” she said earnestly. “I wish Luz would try to seduce me like that. Though there is something to be said for doing it the human way.”
“It’s not romantic!” Camila snapped. “It’s creepy!”
“I guess we’ve just got cultural differences then,” Amity said with a shrug.
Camila opened her mouth to say something and then she realized what Amity was saying. By Demon Realm standards, the gifts she’d been receiving had been an extremely romantic seduction. Which meant that it was possible that what she was experiencing was not a courtship at the hands of a creepy human stalker, but rather a well-meaning demon or witch! And Camila knew which individual was most likely to be responsible for it.
It was such a pity. She really had a lot of respect for Eda, and then she had to ruin it by trying to cheat on her spouse.
Before Camila could say anything more, Luz emerged from her bedroom dressed in a very nice outfit. Amity looked at Luz like she hung the stars from the sky. It always warmed Camila’s heart to see that expression on Amity’s face. She’d despaired for quite some time Luz would never find someone who looked at her that way.
“You look sensational,” Amity whispered.
“Hey, you look pretty nice yourself, batata,” Luz said with a flirtatious wink. Camila couldn’t help but crack a grin a little. In that instant, she looked so much like Antonio. He’d always been a preposterously smooth talker.
Camila made a split second decision. “Luz, can I talk to you in private? There’s something very important I want to discuss.”
Luz groaned. “But, mom, I’ve already gotten sex ed at both my old school and Hexside!” Amity got so beet red with embarrassment that she had to sit down on the sofa to prevent herself from fainting.
“No, no, it’s an entirely different matter,” Camila assured her daughter and led her upstairs. “I have reason to believe those gifts were from Eda.”
Luz let out a gasp. “Of course! I should have seen it before! Those are classic Demon Realm courtship rituals.” A knowing look formed in her eyes. “Oh, I know what this is about. And don’t worry, mom, I’m totally okay with you dating Eda!”
Camila could not believe what she was hearing. “Luz, you cannot be serious! I really thought better of you.” Luz looked bewildered. “To suggest that I entertain Eda’s suggestion…well, to be frank, mija, it speaks badly of your moral fiber.”
“Um…why?” Luz said. “I assume Raine’s onboard with this, right? Let’s be honest here. Eda’s not exactly big on tradition. It had to have been their idea.”
Camila felt like she was missing something. “I don’t understand.”
“The two of them want you to join their relationship,” Luz said like she was saying something to a small child, and then she gasped. “Oh, of course! You don’t know! Mom, polyamory is totally cool in the Demon Realm. A ton of people do it.”
“Polyamory?” Camila echoed. She’d heard of people who did that, but they were always ostracized by society. While it did sound appealing, Camila had been pretty sure she was pushing her luck as it was being openly bi. “That’s…you’re saying both Eda and Raine want to date me, then?”
“Well, not necessarily,” Luz said. “I mean, it could just be Eda with Raine just being the idea enby. In that case, both Raine and you would date her, but you and Raine would be just friends. Can I see the original note?” Camila, feeling a bit dazed, handed over the note. “Aha! Here, it says from your secret admirers. And, wow, this is really smooth. There’s no way Eda wrote this. Not that I’m putting her down! She’s just always more of a lady of action.”
Camila was astonished. She could hardly believe her luck. Could it really be possible that not one but two very caring, powerful, and attractive witches were interested in her? “What do you think I should do?” she asked.
“Date them both!” Luz said immediately. “They put so much effort into this. They’re clearly both head over heels in love with you. And I just want you to be happy.” She gave Camila a fond smile. “No matter what happens, we’ll always be each other’s valentines, right?”
Camila nodded firmly. “Indeed. Well, have a nice time with your novia, and remember to keep your hands above the waist!”
“MAMI!” Luz shouted, her face turning as red as Amity’s had been earlier.
Camila cackled as she watched Luz rush out of the room and hurry Amity out of the house as quickly as possible. She dithered for a few minutes, doing various chores, but then she decided to just bite the bullet and get it over with. If she was wrong, surely they wouldn’t take it personally and they could all have a good laugh. And if she was right…well, if she was right, she was about to have a very good afternoon herself. Better, probably. After all, she could put her hands wherever she liked.
So she quickly made her way to the Owl House and found Raine and Eda playing Hexes Hold ’Em in the living room. Camila’s heart was beating so hard in her chest. It was like she was back in high school, working up the courage to talk to Antonio. (Little did she know back then that he was working up the courage to talk to her.)
“I got your gifts,” she said after what felt like an eternity of awkward silence.
Eda’s eyes lit up. “She got our gifts, Raine!” she called out, sounding as giddy as a schoolgirl. “Well? What did you think?”
“Eda, I’m gonna be blunt – your courtship may have been romantic in the Demon Realm, but you scared the living daylights out of me,” Camila said. Eda probably would have looked less devastated if Camila had punched her. “I genuinely thought someone was stalking me and wanted to kill me or worse.”
Raine breathed in sharply. “Camila, I am so sorry. We did not intend that. We should have been more sensitive to our cultural differences…”
“Yeah, Cammy, we had no clue,” Eda said.
“Well, it was a misunderstanding that we’ve thankfully cleared up,” Camila said in a tone of voice that indicated clearly that discussion on the topic was closed. “Fortunately for you…I’ve honestly had a thing for you both for a while. So…” She wasn’t quite sure what to say next.
“Can we offer you a romantic Valentine’s Day outing then to celebrate becoming our girlfriend?” Raine asked.
“I think that would be lovely,” Camila said, and planted a kiss on Raine’s cheek, then Eda’s.
*****
Gus had made a terrible mistake. He’d mentioned Hunter’s concerning statement in the group chat for the Emerald Entrails and then forgotten to exclude Willow from seeing it. It had taken all of his rhetorical skills to prevent her from going ballistic and eviscerating Hunter then and there. After all, as he’d pointed out, they had no way of knowing whether or not Hunter had meant his statement in a romantic context or not.
Besides, why would Hunter have an affair at all? Setting aside the fact that Hunter’s self-confidence was just so low that the idea that anyone else could be interested in him (despite the fact that Gus knew with certainty that there was a line of individuals just waiting for Huntlow to crash and burn so they could be Hunter’s next significant other) was incomprehensible to him, Hunter was just not the type to engage in affairs. It was completely against his character to harm Willow in such a manner.
And even if by some bizarre circumstance Hunter had decided to engage in an affair, he wouldn’t be dumb enough to let slip that he was having one to Gus. If Hunter was having an affair, no one would ever know about it. Hunter was a master strategist (sometimes too much of one to the point where it impeded his ability to act spontaneously) and if he wanted to hide an affair, it would remain hidden.
But Willow’s self-confidence was hardly any better. Amity’s redemption and firm commitment to being Willow’s friend now hadn’t erased the many years she and her bully compatriots had spent hurting her. Gus had forgiven Amity, as had Willow, but forgiveness didn’t make the damage go away. Willow and Hunter both had sky high opinions of one another and absolutely horrible opinions of themselves. Of course Willow would suspect she was being cheated on; she had to have feared ever since she began the relationship Hunter would throw her away for someone “better.”
Unfortunately, once Willow had moved past her homicidal anger, she was left with sadness, anxiety, and depression. She truly seemed to believe it was an inevitability that her relationship with Hunter was coming to a close, and was even thinking about preemptively breaking up with him just to spare herself the pain of having him do it first.
“Willow, you’re talking nonsense,” Viney said sternly on a scroll call. “I’m sure Hunter loves you very much. This project he’s working on is probably a Valentine’s Day present for Darius or my dad.”
Willow shook her head. “I spoke to both of them. They already got his presents. Oh, let’s face it, Viney. What do I have to offer him? I’m just a half-witch. My family is poor, he grew up as royalty.”
“Your parents love you and he grew up with a piece of shit masquerading as an uncle,” Viney retorted. “I’m obviously not at liberty to discuss what he may or may not have discussed with my mom, but I can tell you those sessions run long.”
Gus squeezed Willow’s hands. “You know something? I remember a young girl who saw someone in need, someone who was being bullied by his classmates, and helped even though she risked being bullied herself. I never thought that girl was a half-witch, and I still don’t think you are.” He looked her straight in the eye. “You’re my first and best friend, Willow Park, and if Hunter’s stupid enough to cheat on you – and I repeat, he most definitely is not – then he can go to hell. Because I will always take your side.”
“And he’s off the team too if he does that,” Viney vowed. “But Gus is right. There’s obviously a rational explanation. He probably just made two gifts for Darius or something innocuous like that.”
Willow wiped a tear from her eye. “Thanks, guys. Yeah. You’re right. I’m acting silly.” She drew herself up. “You know what I’m gonna do? I’m gonna march right over to your house, Viney, and demand an explanation!”
“Sounds good! I’ll help you hide the body if need be,” Viney said, and hung up. Gus hoped she didn’t mean that literally. She probably did. Viney was very ride or die when it came to her relationships.
Willow practically dragged Gus all the way to the Kudzu residence and stormed into the workshop where, as always, Hunter was working. Hunter let out a shout and quickly put a sheet above whatever he was working on before they could get a good look at it.
“What’s going on, Hunter?” Willow asked without preamble.
Hunter gave a smile at seeing her. “Oh, hey, Willow. You know, I wasn’t planning on asking you to the unveiling, but you are my girlfriend, so I suppose it’d be appropriate. This is really gonna knock your socks off.” Willow just looked confused. “You can come in now, Flap!”
Flapjack flew in through an open window, looking more excited than Gus had seen him for some time. “Well, as I told Gus, there is only one person who qualifies as the most important person in my life. And that someone is you, Flapjack!” Willow let out a groan, her face red with embarrassment. Gus wasn’t feeling much better himself. Of course that descriptor applied to Flapjack. As much as Hunter loved Willow, it was always going to be a fraction of the love he felt for his palisman.
Flapjack looked surprised. “What about Willow? Oh, of course I love Willow.” Willow let out a gasp. “But without you, I never would have changed. I would have stayed a hapless stooge of Belos and died on the Day of Unity or maybe before if he’d gotten tired of me. So without further ado, I present…”
He lifted the sheet off of his project, revealing an extremely elegant, well constructed birdhouse under it. “Your new home! Yes, it’s all for you!” Flapjack wrapped his wings around Hunter’s arm, his equivalent of a hug. “Aw, I love you too, buddy.”
Willow looked at the floor, still looking ashamed and humiliated. “Hunter, I’m so sorry. I actually thought you were cheating on me…”
“With Flapjack?!” Hunter said, looking utterly disgusted.
“No, no, I didn’t know it was him you were talking about,” she said hurriedly. “It’s just, you said it was for the most important person in your life, and I just leaped to the wrong conclusion…”
Hunter nodded. “I’m sorry, Willow. I didn’t think about how that term would effect you.” He leaned forward and kissed her on the lips. “I love you with all my heart. In fact, after I gave this gift to Flapjack, I was planning on coming to your house to surprise you for a Valentine’s Day evening you’ll never forget. I got us both seats at the Kraken’s Heart.”
Gus’s mouth fell open. The Kraken’s Heart was the most expensive restaurant in all of Bonesborough. A meal there would even have strained Mrs. Blight’s wallet. “How…?” he asked Hunter.
Hunter looked smug. As he had a right to be – the Kraken’s Heart had a wait list months long. “Let’s just say the owner and I came to an…understanding. He doesn’t want his dirty laundry that I became aware of back when I was the Golden Guard in the papers.” Hunter looked even smugger now. “Of course, I never promised not to tell the police tomorrow…”
“I have the best boyfriend in creation,” Willow said, her voice filled with awe.
The two of them just kept on staring into each other’s eyes, and Gus took that as his cue to leave. Valentine’s Day was awesome, but being a third wheel still sucked.