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There were many things Maximilian Veers loved about Firmus Piett. Piett was a diligent admiral. He could track down a Rebel Base in the far reaches of the galaxy. He had a dry sense of humor that made Veers grin on gloomy days.
But he was also a thieving little gremlin in bed.
Veers couldn’t judge Piett too harshly. He supposed the sailor had little control over his actions in his sleep. Still, it was difficult not to get irritated when Veers repeatedly awoke to find his side of the blanket pilfered.
They’d tried separate blankets, only to have both mysteriously redistributed to Piett overnight. On one occasion, Veers had attempted to bundle up his sailor into a tight cocoon of blankets, only to have the latter break free and resume his snatching. There was no limit to this theft, and somehow, Piett always woke up cold as ice.
And so, it seemed, Veers had exhausted his options, that is until he found a tentative solution in the armory.
“What is that?” Piett asked.
He was standing in the doorway, looking baffled as Veers made his arrangements.
“A blanket,” Veers answered.
“That is not a blanket,” Piett said. “That’s a sheet of metal.”
“It’s a chainmail blanket,” Veers clarified. “I guess you navy boys don’t have these.”
“And I suppose they’re the norm in the army.” Piett rolled his eyes. “If I were to ask Covell, I’m sure everyone is using them, and this is not at all one of your mad ideas.”
“I’m a pioneer in the field,” said Veers.
Piett watched Veers tuck in the chainmail sheet. The metal jingled with each tug.
“It’s very noisy,” Piett remarked.
“That’s part of the charm.”
Veers took a step back to look upon his work with pride. It was a perfect solution: too heavy for the sailor to snatch and noisy enough that he’d wake up during any attempted snatching.
“I feel like this is because of me,” Piett said sadly.
“Well, I do think this will help with that one issue we’ve been having,” Veers admitted. “But don’t get me wrong. You know I still love having you in bed, sailor.”
“Fine.” Piett gave a resigned sigh. “But just to be clear, I’m not having sex on a chainmail blanket.”
“You know the chainmail is actually very…”
“No, Max.”
Veers awoke an hour past midnight to the jingling of ten thousand tiny rings. Piett was still asleep, but his hand had gripped the edge of the blanket. Just as planned, the blanket proved too heavy for the slumbering sailor to pilfer. Piett stirred, mumbled something about “army blokes in shining armor” and rolled over to sleep.
Veers smiled. This was all going according to plan.
The second time Veers awoke that night, his blanket was still in its rightful place. However, something was wrong.
Where was his pillow?
The culprit was sleeping peacefully beside him, snuggling his newest prize. If not for the ache in his neck, Veers would have found the sight adorable. Actually, the sailor was still quite cute, looking so comfortable nestled against the stolen pillow, but Veers could not let that excuse this unlawful behavior.
He reached out and gently tried to take back what was his. Unfortunately, Piett proved very stubborn in sleep and only clung on tighter. Seeing as the battle had come to a stalemate, Veers did what any reasonable commander would do and shook his partner awake for negotiations.
“Sailor,” he hissed into Piett’s ear.
Piett hummed and opened his eyes.
“What time is it?” he asked groggily.
“2:30,” Veers said. “What do you have there?”
“What do I…” Piett looked down. “Oh. Uh, this belongs to you.”
Sheepishly, he relinquished the pillow to Veers.
“Thank you.” Veers put the pillow back where it belonged. “You really are a thieving little sailor.”
“Sorry,” Piett said. “Next time, wake me up.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.” Veers gave him a stern look. “But first you have to make up for this time and all the others.”
“How am I supposed to… ack!”
Piett yelped as Veers pulled him into a tight embrace beneath the chainmail blanket.
“Snatching sailors get snatched.” Veers’s hard gaze melted into a soft smile. “That seems fair to me. What do you think?”
“Alright,” Piett surrendered. “This is fine.”
He paused and then added:
“You know this chainmail actually isn’t as bad as I thought it would be. Maybe it’s just because you’re so warm.”
“I can get you one too, you know,” Veers offered.
“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves, groundpounder.”