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“Augustus! Who names their gosh darn child Agustus?” Jedediah and Octavius sat on the shoulder of Larry as they walked through the new exhibit. The hall of Miniatures was decked out with full scale Roman chariots and infantry weapons. And the crown jewel yet to be brought was a full scale wax sculpture of their very own Octavius. “Oh hush now, my name is a very noble one, passed down through generations!”
Each of the exhibits were heading back to their designated spots as cracks of daylight began to pool throughout the museum. “Come on, you two. No more fighting.” Larry yawned as he placed the two down in their respective areas. “Now the wax statue is set to arrive here some time later today and we'll be able to have it set up by tonight.” A loud crash sounded throughout the space as a clan of cavemen came running through. “I should go after them, good night!”
“Goodnight to you, good sir!”
“Night Gigantor!”
Jedediah looked in the direction of the Roman generals' case, “Can’t wait to see big you Oc.” A shy smile spread across the Roman’s face as looked toward the western exhibit, “As do I, friend.”
As the day passed by a group of men brought a large box that was subsequently signed by Dr. McPhee and brought to the miniature hall. Later that night, as Larry's shift started, the first thing he did was sit in the hall and wait for the new arrival to wake for their very first time. As dusk fell upon the sleepy town the residents of the museum began to stir. Slowly but surely, big Octavius eyes opened as his once stiff body became loose and life-like. He stumbled out of his box and hesitantly touched the floor of the museum. “There’s no need to be afraid. Let me take that back, it's probably pretty terrifying coming to life for the first time.” The man gave Larry a blank stare, “.......hi i’m Larry.” Big Octavius shook his head and looked down at his hands, “Larry, what's happening?”
“Ah well you see, this museum is home to a relic called Ahkmenrah’s tablet that-”
“No Larry. What I am trying to say is, "Why am I so big?”
Larry paused for a second and looked at Big Octavius and then walked over to the miniature case. “Hey guys can I talk to Oc for a second?” Oc’s soldiers looked up at Larry with concern and pointed to where his miniature usually stud. In that spot, stud Octavius, frozen in place, just like a plastic figure. “What the hell? Why didn’t he change?”
“That’s what I've been asking!” Jedediah ran toward the taller man in cleared distress, “Is there somethin wrong with the tablet again?”
“My friends, there is nothing wrong with me. Actually something amazing has happened, gaze in awe at my glorious form!” Big Octavius ran toward the confused night guard and gave him a strong hug, “My you really are short for a normal sized person.” He let go of Larry who still looked confused. “Octavius….are you really our Octavius?”
“I know how to test and see if this big guy is the real Oc or not!” Jedediah made a motion for Larry to put his hand out but Octavius reached out and picked up the man instead. “Jed you're so…small.” A small blush appeared on the Romans face as he looked down at his friend. “Hey! Stop! Stop manhandling me!” Jedediah kicked and wailed as Octavius held him up by the collar of his shirt. “Whoa Whoa Oc, we don’t carry miniatures like that!” Larry quickly placed a hand underneath Jed’s legs giving him a place to stand. “Ah my friend I am truly sorry, I should have known better.” Typically, when apologizing the Roman general would bow and then give the recipient a hug. But being as tall as he was he just awkwardly bowed before the smaller man. “So Jed, how do you know whether or not he’s our Octavius?” Jed hid his face under the brim of his hat, a red tint painting his face, “Nevermind, I already know he’s our Toga Boy.”
“Ah thank you for believing me Jed!”
“Anytime big guy.”
Larry looked between the two in confusion, “Wait Jed, how did you-”
“Big guy? Where did that nickname come from?” Octavius looked in confusion at his now vastly smaller friend.
“Well I mean, look attcha! You're no toy soldier now.” His words were filled with a silent sadness that went unnoticed by the taller two.
“You know what? Now that you're bigger you can finally join in some of the museum games.” Larry looked at the Roman enthusiastically as he placed Jed on his shoulder and took Oc by the hand. Jed made a small noise of displeasure at both the very obvious manhandling and taking of Octavius’s hand. “Yes! Let us play your soccer, and tag as you call it!” Octavius pulled ahead of the two and ran down the hall toward the main foyer crashing into multiple exhibits on the way there.
Larry looked down at Jed and smiled, “Guess he’s still getting used to his new body.” The word ‘new’ rang throughout Jed’s head as he masked a smile, “I-I guess he is.” Larry placed the smaller man down on the main desk as he joined in a game of football. Jedediah watched Octavius in silence. The man had looked so happy, wrestling with Attila, petting Rexy, riding on Ted’s horse. He hadn’t looked so happy in a long time. And that thought made Jed hang his head.
Not once, since admiring his new body's capabilities, had Oc even spoken to Jed as he laughed and played with the other residents throughout the night. And Jed? He sat in silence, watching the group laugh and play, wishing that he too could join in the activities. That he too, could talk with Octavius. A sickening jealousy crept its way through Jed’s body as he was left all alone. He himself hadn't even noticed his own silence. But someone else did.
“If you want to have a quiet night I don’t think being out here is the best option.” Ahk sat down at the desk and laid his head on the table, “if you want I can take you back to your western village.” Jed looked up at the taller man and shook his head, “I ain’t lookin for quiet.”
“Then why are you all alone?” Something on his face must have answered the question for him as Ahkmenrah wrapped a hand around Jed’s body, “talk to me friend, what's wrong?”
“He’s just so big. And he’s so far away and I can’t reach him! I should be happy for him but I'm not…I'm all alone without him. Is it selfish for me to be talkin like this?” Tears fell down Jed’s face as he looked up at the prince. At first glance, Jedediah Smith was the ideal image of a frontier man. Strong, independent, courageous. But deep down, he was more emotional than any other exhibit. “Do not worry my small friend,” Akh pointed at the Roman, “not matter how big he is, he’ll always lov-”
“He’ll always be your friend!”
Jedediah looked at the Egyptian in confusion, “What did you say?” Akh stud up and crossed his arms, “I said that you two will always be best friends! Now let's get back to our exhibits. It seems like dawn is almost upon us.” He offered a hand to Jed who reluctantly allowed himself to be carried.
Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad after all
He was wrong.
A week had gone by since that night and Oc had barely acknowledged Jedediah. Jed had tried many times to get his friends attention, but was always dismissed in favor of some gigantor game or Hun wrestling match. The only one who really seemed to pay attention to the cowboy was Akhmenrah. As days passed the Egyptian had noticed Jed’s mood became more and more sour toward the other exhibits.
Today was no exception as Jed and Akh wandered the halls of the museum. “My deer friend. Though I do appreciate our nightly walks, I believe it is time for you and Octavius to sit down and talk with each other.” The smaller man grumbled in frustration, “I've tried talkin to him but he ain’t in the mood to listen.” He balled his hands into fists and sank deeper into the Egyptians head piece. Ahkmenrah sighed and picked Jed up, placing him on top of a rock in the cavemen exhibit, “If you do not want my help then that's fine. If you don’t want to talk to Oc anymore then that's fine too,” Jed flinched at the thought, “But you can’t take it out on everyone else. There are many different exhibits that would be willing to talk to you if you just listen.”
Jed tilted his hat down and offered himself up to the Egyptian. Ahk picked him up and began their walk once more, “I think I want to turn in early tonight.” Reluctantly, Ahk brought the smaller man back to his exhibit and set him down. He then took a seat next to the old west and smiled at Jed’s confusion, “You're not the only one who could use a little more beauty sleep.” Jed laughed and layed down in the fake dirt, “You're an odd one aren't ya partner?”
As the hours passed Jed and Akh sat admiring the world around them, the animals that played throughout the halls, the philosophers and ancient beings discussing the world and its existence. They made fun of Teddy for his mushy romantic gestures toward Sacagawea. At some point Attila also joined in on their game, sitting with Ahk who leaned into the big man's fur outfit. Soon enough Jed drifted off into a comfortable sleep.
“What's wrong with the little guy?”
“Attila my friend, he’s lonely,” Attila looked at Ahk in confusion, “you know about him and Octavius right?”
“You mean how Octavius is very much in love with Jed, who is also very in love with Octavius.” Ahk laughed at his friend's bluntness, “Yes indeed. It seems like Oc’s new body is preventing Jed and Oc from being together.”
“How so?”
“Well imagine I was the size of Jedediah and you stayed the same,” the Hun nodded, “It would be a lot harder for us to do things together, wouldn’t it be?”
“Ohhhhhh, I understand,” Ahk smiled and looked at the cowboy. “If this was a permanent arrangement I would have already made them talk it out. But because Oc’s body is only here for the rest of the month I've decided to let the two figure it out for themselves.”
“What are you two doing?” The Roman in question strolled through the room in confusion, “It’s almost dawn, shouldn’t you two be back in your exhibits?” Slowly Ahk stood up and stretched out, offering a hand to the Hun who took it with a smile. Attila gave the Egyptian a bone crushing hug and ventured off to find his own exhibit. “Why has Jed already changed back?” A startled Octavius looked at the Egyptian who merely smiled at the display of affection. “Ah, he was just tired after our walk.” Ahk waved goodbye to Octavius and headed toward his exhibit. Octavius turned to the western man and frowned, what was wrong with him?
The next day faded into night as all the exhibits began another exciting night of play. Jedediah woke up slowly and realized he had fallen asleep in the wrong spot. He thought about the earful Larry must have gotten from the director and laughed. He walked to the edge of the western town and looked out at the other exhibits as they came to life. “What are you up to Jed?” Oc had woken up a little bit earlier than Jed and had watched the cowboy in his plastic state. Jed looked up anxiously at the Roman before shifting his gaze back to the others. “Just waiting for Ahk to show up.” Octavius grit his teeth at the mention of the prince.
“Why are you always waiting for him?” He waved his arms around in an exaggerated manner.
“What's it to ya big fella? I don’t see you standing in line for my attention.”
“Oh, can you go even one conversation without using some stupid insulting nickname!” Before recently, Octavius never once minded the nicknames given to him by Jed. But the more recent ones seem to be more mockery then they were playful jibes.
“Well maybe if you didn’t act like such a big jerk I wouldn’t need to point it out to you.” Jed threw his hat down in anger as he stared up at the taller man.
“You little piece of-”
“LITTLE! Are you kidding me? Correct me if i'm wrong ‘partner’ but you weren’t always so tall and mighty you-”
“Little piece of shit! Why do you have to act like this?” Oc sank to his knees and smashed his fits into the counter surrounding Jed, “Can I not just be happy for a few days Jed? Are you saying that just because I'm bigger, stronger than you we can’t be friends?”
“No! Of course that ain’t what i’m saying, I just..you've been ignoring me this whole dang time and-”
“I’m enjoying myself Jed! I finally get to participate and play with everyone else instead of watching from the sidelines!” Jed huffed and crossed his arms looking away from the Romans piercing glare. But this only seemed to make the Roman more angry. In a fit of desperation Oc grabbed Jed and hoisted him up into the air. A nervous flush crept across Jed’s face as he flayed in Oc’s grasp, “DON’T MANHANDLE ME!” Oc paced around the exhibits in frustration as Jed became more and more fearful. He hated being held like this. Like he was some small, weak, insignificant nothing.
“O-okay I yield, put me down and we'll hash this out like real men.” He shook in his friend's hold as the man merely glared at his request. “Or-or you can just let me down and we don’t talk? Just sit, r-relax and smell the flower-”
“Would you just be quiet!” Octavius spat angrily at the smaller man who backed up until he was sitting back to back with the man's fingers. “You think just saying a couple of words will fix how I feel? It’s clear you value your own happiness over mine.” Without warning Jed fell back onto the hard polished floors of the museum. “Jed- shit, i’m sorry I didn’t mean to do that.” He fell to his knees and reached out to the cowboy.
“What is going on in here?!” Ahk stared at the two in disbelief. Jed was cowering on the floor while Oc towered over him with a panic in his eyes. “Ahk- I didn’t mean....I wasn’t trying too.” He looked down at his shaking hands. Ahk stood between the two and held out a hand for Oc, “Get up and take a walk.” Oc looked at Jed then Ahk’s hand. Sadly he took the Egyptians hand and rose to his feet. A few silent tears rolled down his cheeks as he looked at Jed. His left leg was bent in an unnatural manner, while he hid his face in his hands. “Alright…” he leaned toward Ahk and whispered in his ear, “Just make sure he’s okay.” He turned and left with a sigh.
The Prince raked his eyes over Jed’s quivering form. The closer he got the more Jed seemed to move away, so he sat down next to the man instead, “Are you okay Jed? Your leg seems to be bent out of place.” Jed looked up but didn’t say anything, merely nodding his head in agreement. Slowly, Ahk placed a hand next to the cowboy who looked on anxiously. “You need help Jed. If I can’t give you what you need then tell me who can.”
“I…I don’t need nothin’ fancy. Call over some of my boys and they’ll do the rest.”
Though it took much longer than usual the western exhibit was able to maneuver Jed back up to the desert and wrap his leg. The entire time Ahk watched on, willing to help but fearful to interfere. “I am no apothecary or ‘doctor’ as Larry says, but I do know that you should stay off your leg for the next couple of nights.” Jed smiled and limped toward a tent, “Wasn’t planning on staying up much longer anyway.”
“Alright then,” Ahk stood up and gave one last goodbye to the cowboy before wandering off. With what little time he had left, Ahk set out with one goal in mind. As he entered the front hall of the museum he spotted the man in question. “Day is almost upon us, and yet you stand out here? You don’t want Larry to get in trouble now do you?” Octavius looked over at the Egyptian and sighed, “I don’t deserve my own spot.” Ahk spun the General around so he could see his face.
“You're upset about what happened?”
“How could I not be! You saw what happened, I scared Jed half to death. He wouldn’t even let me help him. His leg was all twisted and bent and he hid away from me like I was some giant monster. He's my friend and I hurt him.”
“My friend,” he held his shoulders firmly, “You are not mad that you hurt your friend, you're mad that you hurt someone you love.”
Octavius backed away from the prince, “LOVE? Wi-with Jedediah? No, Ahk no I can’t be, he doesn't even-”
“Like you?” He laughed as the General looked on in confusion, “He loves you more than anything. Why for the longest time everyone thought you two were already together.” Octavius’s face bloomed a deep crimson as he replayed the prince’s message in his mind. “He loves me? Are you sure of it?”
“I have never been more sure of anything in my life.”
As they looked at each other they neglected to note the sun slowly rising in the distance. Without realizing it, their bodies began to stiffen and revert back to normal. The visitors of that day were surprised to be greeted by the wax figures of Ahkmenrah and Octavius. And Larry was fully chewed out for their ‘misplacement.’
As the evening sun began to set the two woke up, still in the main hall. “Ah, I believe we may have gotten a bit side tracked last night.” Ahkmenrah scratched the back of his head in embarrassment. Surprisingly Octavius didn’t move. He stayed as lifelike as he was during the day. “Octavius?”
In the western exhibit Jed had been relaxing against a tree as he watched the others work. His injured leg was propped up against a rock and his hat was tilted over his eyes.
“For a man with a broken leg you seem to be well adjusted.”
“Yeah? And what's it to ya, you-” he looked up and was met with Octavius’s suffocating stare. But he wasn’t big, it was small Octavius, his Octavius. “You’re-your not big anymore? The exhibit is here for the rest of the month so why are you not…big?” Octavius sat down in front of the cowboy, “I’m afraid being tall just isn’t what I had expected. It wasn’t the same.”
“Same as what?”
Octavius took a long, deep breath in, “It wasn’t the same without you being there.” He took Jed’s hand and placed it on his chest, “Without you, my life has no meaning. This gift we have been given, would mean nothing to me if you weren’t here to spend it with me.” Tears began to spill from his pleading eyes, “I'm sorry, I'm so damn sorry. For everything, for ignoring you, for being angry, for being jealous.” Jed began to cry as well, as he clasped Oc’s other hand, “Who are you jealous of?”
“Ahk of course! You’ve spent entire nights with him, talking together, taking naps together, sharing secrets. Some days you wouldn’t even greet me.”
“Come on partner, s’not like you wanted to talk. You were too busy talkin with your gigantor friends to talk to little old me.”
“That's why I am saying this now.” Jed looked at Octavius in confusion, “say what?”
“I love you”
Time stood still as the two looked at each other. Octavius had a look of determination, while Jed seemed panicked and overwhelmed, “Y-yo-you like me? Come on, who-who are you kidding? Stop pulling on my leg, it's already broken.” Jed forced a laugh and tugged at the brim of his hat, covering his eyes once again. Octavius sat stunned, his face scrunching up into pure agony. He was right, and Ahk was wrong.
“Why?” Octavius didn’t respond.
“Why would you ever like someone as-as stupid and l-little as me?” Octavius whipped the tears from his face as he finally realized what was happening, “Jed look at me.” He reached for the cowboys hat but the blond pulled away, pressing his back into the tree. “Didn’t your mama tell you it ain’t nice to play with a pretty girl's heart?” Jed sobbed as he stared at the ground. Oc was lying to him, playing a prank, joking. Soft lips touched the top of his hat. Slowly, Jed lifted his head and stared at the man before him. His face was flush, his eyes glowed like moonlight and his hands felt as soft as an angel's touch. Finally, Jed reached out and pressed his lips against Octavius’s. Tears of joy danced in the air as the two finally sat together as one. No longer alone, finally together.
Ahk and Larry looked at the scene with mixed expressions. Ahk had what could only be described as a shit eating grin while Larry was catching flies with how wide open his mouth was.
“I told you, Guardian of Brooklyn, that I would be a perfect matchmaker.”