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“Kakashi, what are you doing standing on the ceiling?”
“Nothing much, just hanging out.”
“Very funny.” Iruka crosses his arms and looks sternly up at the Jounin, who is indeed hanging upside-down from the ceiling, feet firmly planted next to the light-bulb fixture with his hands in his pockets like this is a perfectly normal thing to do. Maybe if he was twelve and still amazed at the wonders of chakra, but at his age, it’s a little ridiculous. “You’re leaving marks all over my ceiling.”
“I’ll clean them up later.” Kakashi’s teeth flash in a flirtatious smile. “But first I want to try something…new.”
“Dusting the fan while you’re up there?”
“Kissing.”
That makes Iruka pause, blinking in confusion.
“Kiss? You mean…like that? Upside-down?” The ceiling in Iruka’s apartment is higher than normal, ten feet or so, tall enough that he’s basically standing eye-to-eye with the other man. It could work, if he bends a little and finds the right angle. If he were actually considering it, that is. “Where’d you get an idea like that? Your books?”
“Saw it in a film, actually.” Kakashi cocks his head, his usually messy hair now even crazier from hanging upside-down. “Looked pretty fun. Let’s try it.”
Kakashi, no.” Iruka flushes, rubbing his scar nervously. “I don’t think it’s a good idea.”
“Why not?” Kakashi’s got a look on his face like he kicked one of the dogs. Iruka refuses to give in.
“How’s it even going to work? I’m going to strain my neck or something.”
“Nonsense! Here, I’ll show you-”
Kakashi’s head suddenly swings forward and he promptly cracks Iruka in the eye with his nose. The room is filled with twin hisses of pain and a slew of impressive swearwords.
“Well I’m completely turned off now,” Iruka mutters after running out of swears, his face burning with embarrassment and eye aching.
“Don’t give up so easily, Iruka!” Kakashi whines, rubbing his smarting nose.
“I think you gave me a black eye.”
“Look, I’m sorry I hurt you, but we shouldn’t let it stop us. Let’s try again.”
“We’re taking it slow this time,” Iruka says, warningly.
“Yes.”
“Don’t head-butt me again or I’ll stick you up there for the rest of the day.”
“Yes, yes.” Kakashi holds out his hands, beckoning. Iruka steps forward to meet him, Kakashi awkwardly taking his face in his hands and pulling him closer.
“Ow.”
“Wait, turn your-”
“Ow!”
“Okay, hold on, let me-”
“OW! Dammit- Kakashi, stop!” Iruka twists away, rubbing his twinging neck. His face is burning with humiliation. “This…isn’t going to work. I feel stupid.”
“Iruka, NO. You are beautiful. You are a GOD. Even when you’re yelling at me like right now.”
“…Is that supposed to make me feel better-”
“Yes but I’m horrible at it. Sue me. Just…one more try?” Kakashi is doing the eye thing again, and Iruka can feel his resolve weakening. “I’m getting a little light-headed here, I promise this will be the last attempt. Then I’ll never ask you again. I’ll even dust the fan. Please?”
Iruka hesitates a moment longer, then lets out a long-suffering sigh, pushes away his lingering embarrassment, and once again steps into Kakashi’s embrace.
This time the angle is perfect, their mouths slotting together seamlessly. It’s still a little confusing and weird, but after a couple seconds of fumbling, the kiss deepens into something more familiar, enough so that Iruka relaxes and even starts to enjoy himself a little. Kakashi nips at his lips, and Iruka responds, feeling frisky, by allowing him in and suddenly sucking on his tongue-
Which of course makes Kakashi lose his chakra control and plummet from the ceiling, slamming into him on the way down and taking them both to the floor, a tangle of limbs and bruises. More swears echo off the walls.
“I think I have two black eyes now,” Iruka groans out. “We are never doing this again.”
“How about an underwater kiss?” Kakashi asks hopefully, raising his head. His hair is now a lost cause. “We could try it in the hot-springs or the river or even the bathtub-”
“WE’D DROWN!” Iruka shoves him off and staggers to his feet, wincing as several bones pop. He starts for the fridge to get some ice, tossing over his shoulder, “Clean the ceiling and dust that damn fan or you’re not getting any more kisses, normal or otherwise!”
Kakashi has never cleaned anything faster or more thoroughly.
He still hasn’t given up on that underwater kiss, though.
