Chapter Text
First week of summer.
Ava’s eighteenth birthday week was full of emotions. On Monday, she had finished all of her final exams and she was able to spend her afternoons catching up with all of her favorite shows, or hanging out with her friends at the beach, the weather in Orange Coral Springs, Florida, being already warm enough to get her body wrinkled with seawater.
On Thursday, she went to do some prom dress shopping with her best friends, deciding to wear a lavender colored dress that would match with JC’s tie, the both of them thinking about which color would fit them both better and, at the same time, they wouldn’t be the center of attention even though Ava was sure that would be inevitable.
“Come on,” Camila snorted as Ava tried on her dress, prom being on Saturday and delaying the dress shopping until the last minute, “You’re talking about the football team’s captain in his case, and the president of the student council and drama club in your case. You’re so going to be Prom King and Queen.”
“Maybe not,” Ava rolled her eyes, “Maybe it’ll be Bea and Mike. They’re going together, right?”
“As friends, yeah,” Camila said, looking away for a second and setting her eyes on a beautiful red dress.
“It’s kind of weird how the male lead actor of the drama club and the captain of the girls’ soccer team haven’t gotten together, isn’t it?” Ava chuckled, thinking about her best friend, Beatrice, and JC’s best friend, Michael, “In all the movies and books I’ve read, the main character’s best friend always gets with the love interest’s best friend.”
“And who is who?” Camila arched her eyebrow, but Ava was too busy thinking about the pictures Beatrice had sent her wearing her own pale yellow prom dress, how Ava had stupidly blushed and had to take a few minutes to respond, “Aves?”
“Huh?” Ava blinked, stupidly, turning around and looking at Camila’s red dress, “Oh, that’s going to fit you so well.”
On Friday, Ava was giddy with excitement. It was the last match of OCS Saint Melanie’s Emeralds, their school’s girl soccer team, against Saint Bartholomew’s Devils, which was kind of an ironic name to use when you were part of a Catholic school soccer team.
Whoever won would end up winning the inter-school national championship and, therefore, prom the next day would have an extra reason to extend the partying until late at night, hopefully dawn, away from their teachers’ eyes and the alcohol they wouldn’t have to hide, nor pretend it was soda.
“Let’s go, Bea!” Ava screamed over the noise, as the girls from OCS Saint Melanie’s Emeralds came out onto the field, wearing the green and white soccer kits matching the green sweaters they wore as uniform, their ties and skirts or pants a dark shade of gray.
The lessons for senior year students had been done two weeks ago, all of them focusing on studying for their finals and attending class to go over what they had done over the last few months. Their excitement had built up slowly, as the team won match after match, and Ava knew Saint Melanie’s would become the victors of the championship, because Beatrice was leading them, and there was nothing Ava’s best friend couldn’t achieve.
Beatrice had passed all her exams with flying colors, would be named valedictorian and Ava would have the honor, as president of the student council, to introduce Beatrice to the crowd as the school’s best student, letting Beatrice offer a speech Ava was sure would make her cry, her heart filled with pride for the girl that had landed in their small seaside town four years ago, coming all the way from England after a family tragedy brought her and her parents here, into Ava’s life, even if Beatrice’s mother had been born in this place.
“Go, Lilith, go!” Camila cheered next to Ava, as Shannon, who also was part of the team but had an ankle injury and wouldn’t be playing the final match, screamed Mary’s name with her lips parted in a big smile, Yasmine cheering for Dora as Ava kept on chanting Beatrice’s name.
“You’ll lose your voice, Aves,” JC, her boyfriend, joked next to her before him, Michael, Todd and Hans proceeded to scream their friends’ names as well.
Ava felt her lungs emptying of oxygen and her body filled with tension as the referee marked the start of the match, and eleven players wearing emerald green and another eleven girls wearing bright red started to run around the field as if their lives depended on it.
But her eyes fell onto Beatrice, and Beatrice only, and Ava felt her heart hammering as she watched her best friend command the team around the field, her face serious, a little frown between her eyebrows like it always appeared when she was focused on something, and Ava felt a familiar tension set on the pit of her stomach, a feeling she had tried to get rid of all school year, and had failed miserably even when she had pushed it aside for the last four years.
She didn’t know what had triggered it, because she had done an amazing job brushing it all aside, focusing on her own studies (even if she always left everything for the last minute), and focusing on her relationship when she got together with JC at the end of their sophomore year, telling herself that it all had been stupid and she only had to open her eyes a little and see JC was right there.
But Ava was sure it was the fact that this would be their last year together, that she would leave to attend Stanford University in California and Beatrice would be at Harvard, in Massachusetts. They would be separated by three thousand one hundred and twenty-nine miles, a distance of forty-six hours by car, each of them on one side of the country, unable to spend from eight in the morning to eight in the evening together like they had done for the last four years.
Maybe it was the fact she knew she would be away from Beatrice what made her feel like that. She had been stressed out throughout the whole school year, from running the student council and having to organize way too many events throughout the year in order to be able to fund their prom, to being the president of the drama club, to studying for her finals and having to sit down with her aunt and uncle, Vincent and Suzanne, to choose what university she had wanted to attend.
“Harvard said no,” Ava said as she and Beatrice were on their usual Saturday breakfast run, going to Camila’s family restaurant and having breakfast as they took a small break from studying and their school duties, “Fuck.”
“Language,” Beatrice said, before sipping from her milkshake.
“We’re not at school,” Ava rolled her eyes, “And your parents aren’t around.”
“But God is,” Beatrice snorted, and Ava let out a laugh because she knew her best friend was mocking the town’s priest, Father Adriel, and his extra-conservative views. It was something rare, but Ava knew Beatrice was rejoicing on the safety Ava provided and vice versa, knowing Ava wouldn’t get scandalized and would surely join into the fun.
But Ava, deep down, knew Beatrice believed in what she said. Her mother, who had been born in the city before she moved to England to study politics and becoming a diplomat, was on her second year as the town’s mayor and the woman had pretty conservative views, like Beatrice’s father and, ultimately, Beatrice. Or, at least, Beatrice repeated what they said and Ava never knew if the girl actually believed all of that. They were best friends, but while Ava was an open book, Beatrice was a mystery for many, including Ava.
Ava thought she should have that same type of views given that her uncle had been a priest before he decided to marry her aunt and the woman he had loved his whole life, Suzanne, leaving behind his priesthood and causing scandal in the OCS, which is how Ava and her friends called their town.
Aside from that, Ava had been raised in a Catholic household before her parents died in a car accident, and continued on being educated in the faith after she and her brother Diego moved in with their aunt and uncle, attending church every Sunday and attending Catholic School. And, yet, she felt like a stranger in the town that had seen her be born because she didn’t share the views majority of the people in that place shared, maybe truthfully or only to fit in, but they did. And Ava didn’t.
Ava had always been a nonconformist and the older she got, the more things she started to question. And now, she was starting to question why she was starting to feel the way she was feeling towards Beatrice, the way she had felt the first few weeks after meeting the girl, wondering what had triggered, if it all was fear from knowing she would be separating herself from her best friend, or if it was all just something temporary based on that fear, knowing it would go away when she would be alone with JC.
But then, when she was alone at home, all she could think about before falling asleep and after waking up was Beatrice. Beatrice was the first person she texted in the morning, and the last one she texted at night. Beatrice had occupied Ava’s thoughts ever since their very first day at OCS Saint Melanie’s, when the school’s principal and their biology teacher as well, Jillian Salvius, introduced her as Beatrice Wang, the daughter of Evelyn and Waymond Wang.
The seat next to Ava’s was the only free one, and Beatrice had been assigned it as Jillian started to introduce their freshman year biology syllabus. But Ava, honestly, didn’t hear a word of what the principal and Ava’s favorite teacher ever though she wasn’t thinking of getting involved in the world of science after high school, had said.
“Hi,” fourteen years old Ava said, as fourteen years old Beatrice sat down quietly, taking out a yellow notebook and arranging her pens by color, “Can I have a spare paper?”
“What?” Beatrice frowned, her British accent so strong it made Ava feel butterflies. Ava’s best friend looked so different back then, her raven dark hair cut short and a pair of round glasses covering her caramel colored eyes.
“I went to get a notebook yesterday,” Ava started to say, as Beatrice opened hers and Ava witnessed the girl’s elegant handwriting she would now recognize anywhere, “But they weren’t on cell anymore.”
Beatrice’s movements stopped, the top of the paper crowned by only the words BIOLOGY SYLL, and she turned her head around slowly as she registered Ava’s stupid joke. And, for a moment, Ava thought the girl with the freckled cheeks hadn’t understood it, or didn’t find it funny, so she was about to open her mouth and explain that she had replaced the word sell for cell because they were at biology class.
But before she could say anything, Beatrice snorted out loud and the whole class turned around to look at them with curious and amused looks as Ava was covering her mouth after a strange sound, a mix between a gasp because someone as delicate as Beatrice had emitted a sound like that and a laugh because of how funny it had been, had escaped her lips.
“Mrs. Silva, Mrs. Wang,” Jillian wondered, a small frown between her blonde eyebrows, “Something funny?”
“Not Ava,” Beatrice muttered, and Ava’s shoulders shook with more silent laughter as Beatrice cleared her throat, lowing her eyes and finishing to write the title as she bit her lower lip, trying to keep her own laughter at bay.
“As I was saying…” Jillian said, shaking her head and turning around to keep on writing down the concepts they would be learning throughout their freshman year.
“You’re a liar,” Ava muttered after accepting Beatrice’s piece of paper.
“Sorry?” the girl whispered back, pushing her glasses up the bridge of her nose, “I don’t lie, I don’t sin.”
“Well, you said I’m not funny,” Ava arched her eyebrows, and Beatrice smiled at her.
“I only tell the truth.”
Ever since that day at biology class on the very first day of freshman year, when Beatrice had landed new in her mother’s hometown and Ava had decided to introduce herself with a stupid biology pun, the both of them had been attached to the hip throughout their adventures through high school, Beatrice joining the friend group Ava and her childhood best friend, Camila were starting to form and immediately finding things in common with Lilith, another new student at OCS Saint Melanie’s, and all of them immediately becoming friends as if they had known one another their whole lives.
Ava had started to feel that strange way when Beatrice had stood shyly next to Jillian that first day, as Jillian had put a hand on Beatrice’s shoulder and had introduced the new addition of OCS Saint Melanie’s while the girl’s caramel eyes scanned every single face, Ava feeling slightly nervous when the girl’s eyes had landed on her and had remained there for a few seconds longer than they had done with the rest of their classmates.
But she had managed to brush it all aside, and soon all those feelings had been forgotten and her and Beatrice simply became the best of friends, sharing stupid puns no one else found funny, spending their afternoons together at one of their houses before they met up with the rest of their friends, having their own special little traditions of two on Saturday, Beatrice being the first one to know when Ava had her first kiss with JC, all of that stuff.
And yet, here she was now, with her mouth gaping a little as she watched Beatrice move around the field, all the things she had felt four years ago coming back to her. In fact, they had come back every since the summer before they would start their senior year, when Beatrice said she might’ve gotten into Harvard for good after she went there with her parents, how the coach of the Harvard Crimsons said they couldn’t wait to have her amongst their ranks.
It had started then, in that afternoon of August, as they were lazily swimming around Beatrice’s pool while waiting for the rest to show up, the girl had told her all of that. And Ava thought about being away from Beatrice, and then it was as if a Pandora box had opened and she was unable to close it no matter how hard she had tried.
Hugging Beatrice the previous years had been special; having Beatrice’s attention all on herself in the past had made Ava feel unstoppable. Now, it filled her with nerves and it made her struggle to breathe as she tried to act as normal as she could. When they were at Ava’s place, in the kitchen, preparing snacks for their Friday movie nights with their friends, Ava was way too aware of Beatrice’s every single move, the girl’s lemon and cinnamon scent too overwhelming, her touch burning Ava’s skin when Beatrice put a hand on her lower back as she moved behind Ava, as Beatrice’s arm brushed with Ava’s accidentally.
Ava had told herself back in late August, when their senior year began, that it all would go away and she was just overwhelmed by the prospects of what was about to come their way. When JC was around, everything was back to normal and she felt safe and at peace with him, but when she was alone with Beatrice, or with herself… breathing was harder than usual.
And Ava thought it was all her brain tricking her, but then, during their senior year, she had seen flashes of an unreadable emotion appear on Beatrice’s eyes for a moment when she saw Ava and JC together at a party, or just cuddling during movie night, or sharing little secrets during their free periods, when they all reunited outside in the school’s yard and studied while sharing snacks.
“YES!” JC yelled, hugging Michael and Hans as Todd took his shirt off, and his chest was decorated with the words GO EMERALDS!
Ava had been too busy watching Beatrice move flawlessly, she had totally missed Mary scoring the first goal of the match, making the whole school’s little stadium roar in cheer as the Saint Bartholomew’s followers complained and claimed it had been an offside, like they always did every time the Emeralds scored in the previous matches.
Almost two hours later, the whole stadium was cheering out loud and music was blasting as the OCS Saint Melanie’s celebrated their victory, proclaiming themselves champions of the inter-school national championship for the fourth year in a row.
“You give us luck, Wang,” Mary laughed out loud as she hugged Beatrice tightly, as the students in the bleachers, the families and the teaching staff had come down to the field to celebrate with the team, and to congratulate the Saint Bartholomew’s students on their second position.
“I pity the team the next season,” Lilith chuckled, her skin looking flawless even if she had played the full ninety minutes, “What will they do without us?”
“Maybe we could do an exception,” Beatrice suggested, “And come play with them?”
“Don’t be so cocky,” Ava said, nudging Beatrice’s arm, her best friend smiling widely at her and sneaking her arms around Ava’s waist, raising her and spinning her around in joy as Ava squealed and Beatrice laughed, as JC did the same with Lilith and Hans and Todd were holding Mary up, the girl sitting on their shoulders, while Camila, Shannon, and Yasmine laughed as Dora shook her head with a small smile on her lips, recording the guys carrying her older sister by one year around, her short hair dyed half green, half white.
“Thanks, Ava,” Beatrice said, putting Ava down as Ava blamed the wildness in which her heart was beating on the fact Beatrice had just surprised her, on the rush she felt because her best friend had achieved another record and would leave the school in a bang.
“What for?” Ava frowned, as she was too aware of Beatrice’s hands holding hers gently, squeezing them with a wide smile on her lips, her sun-kissed skin glistening, her caramel eyes shining with pride and joy and gratitude.
“You’re my lucky charm,” Beatrice confessed to her, turning around, “The praying circle before the matches work, sure, but I won’t tell Coach Duretti my real luck and blessing is my best friend.”
“Bea,” Ava said, the word coming out as a choking sound but she managed to make it look as if she had laughed at Beatrice’s dramatic confession, even if her head was spinning.
“It’s the truth,” Beatrice hugged her again, “Don’t argue with me.”
“Fine,” Ava said, her hands pressing on Beatrice’s back as she smelled the scent of citrus and cinnamon.
“Ready to party?” Ava felt JC’s loving hands on her shoulders as she separated from Beatrice, the tall guy looking down onto Ava and Beatrice with adoration. He had always claimed Beatrice, being the only one without siblings aside from Lilith, was his younger sister even though Beatrice was the oldest one of them all, her birthday being on January, JC’s being during March.
“Party?” Ava frowned, “I said no parties, guys. We have prom tomorrow, and graduation next week!”
“You really thought we wouldn’t celebrate your eighteenth birthday?” Mary arched her eyebrows, as Shannon had a lazy arm around her shoulders, as Mary was hugging the girl by the waist, and Ava looked away for a second to make sure no one saw. For everyone else, it would look like a friendly gesture, but Ava knew better. Though she had never addressed it, wondering if the rest had realized the same as she did, if they didn’t want to see it as Father Adriel’s words related to same-sex couples and all hung over their heads.
“Guys…” Ava said, and JC squeezed her shoulders, gently.
“It will be just a small gathering, Aves,” Camila promised her, the girl being Ava’s best friend ever since the both of them had learned how to walk. And Ava wondered why she didn’t feel the way she did with Beatrice when Camila hugged her, or cuddled her, or touched her hand.
“Pizza, soda, and some silly movie,” Yasmine added, shrugging her shoulders, “Just like any other Friday.”
“We haven’t done it in a while,” Michael reminded her, “We were too busy preparing for finals.”
“And choosing universities,” Hans added.
“And doing prom shopping,” Todd rolled his eyes.
“So?” Beatrice squeezed Ava’s hand, and Ava felt her body burning up, JC’s hands on her shoulders suddenly becoming too heavy, “What do you say?”
“You three better shower,” Ava smiled at Beatrice, Mary and Lilith, “I don’t want my home to stink.”
“You absolute moron,” Lilith rolled her eyes, but then smiled at her anyways, and the pressure on her chest eased a little as she felt JC kissing the top of her head, and Beatrice dropped her hand to go greet her parents.
*
“If I see the carpet stained,” her aunt Suzanne said, as Ava’s friend group were gathered around the large kitchen counter, Ava’s uncle, Vincent, smiling from the door as he had his phone ready, as Suzanne was lighting up the eighteen candles on Ava’s cake and her twelve years old brother, Diego, was sitting between Beatrice and JC, “I’m making you all come after prom tomorrow, and clean it up with your bare hands.”
“Yes, ma’am,” a chorus of people said, as Ava rolled her eyes, knowing her aunt didn’t really mean it but the woman was so intimidating and serious all the time, even a giant like JC or the most nonchalant person to ever exist like Lilith would be scared of Suzanne Rossi.
Ava had been living with her aunt and uncle ever since she had been twelve years old, losing her parents in a car accident and leaving both her and Diego, who had been six years old by then, orphans. Her aunt and uncle had never had children, they had married at a pretty advanced age after Vincent, her father’s twin brother, had left priesthood around ten years ago, at age forty-three, to marry Suzanne, who had been her mother’s childhood best friend and Ava’s godmother. And, well, the love of Vincent’s life all along after the four of them had been friends since childhood.
It had been a beautiful love story in Ava’s eyes, her parents never telling her otherwise and being the only ones in town who had supported Vincent’s decision, but the rest of the town had frowned upon their priest deciding to leave his work as the Lord’s messenger to marry a woman, to give into the temptation or whatever it was they had murmured behind their backs.
Vincent had been replaced by Father Adriel ten years ago, a man with extremely conservative views, while Vincent had always been more relaxed during his mass service; his sermons always being more open minded which, for some people at Orange Coral Springs, had kind of been a problem and, for the majority, Adriel had been the perfect replacement.
Ava knew her friends and family disliked Adriel and his speeches, but her friends never said anything in public because that meant going against the school rules, always leaving it for their little gatherings. The only one who had never opened up about her opinions was Beatrice, always saying that she couldn’t really give her opinion since, as the mayor’s daughter, she had to stay neutral. Thought Ava had seen the little frowns here and there during the man’s sermons, the way Beatrice clearly disliked some of the things he said, but never voiced it out loud using “neutrality” to cover something else: fear.
But Ava tried to not care about that as much as she did, she tried to not care when she looked to Beatrice’s way during Sunday mass when the girl was on the first row reserved for the town’s authorities, listening to Adriel’s sermons with a frown between her eyebrows, listening to the sermons he gave them during their Wednesday assemblies at school, never participating in the posterior debate their group of friends developed, discussing Adriel’s opinions on the girls’ uniforms or how he believed the cheerleading team should be banned.
“Make a wish,” Beatrice said, nudging her shoulder as Suzanne finished to light up the candles and was watching Ava with a smile filled with adoration, as Vincent was still recording, as her friends waited for her and Diego was devouring the cake with his eyes.
Ava looked around her friends, and then her eyes landed on Beatrice and JC, and her heart constrained again inside her chest as a faint thought started to appear at the back of her mind. She blinked, looking down onto the cake, and closing her eyes.
I wish for things to never change.
And then she blew the candles, and cheer erupted while she felt Beatrice hugging her from behind. And Ava tried her best to hide her blush, and if anyone asked she would blame it on the emotion she was feeling.
After that, Diego had been dragged up to bed when the clock reached midnight and Ava was officially eighteen years and one day old. Her family was asleep, and they all watched a movie with their stomachs full of pizza, soda, and birthday cake.
As usual, everyone fell asleep halfway through the movie and the only ones who were awake were Ava, and Beatrice. Ava had JC’s arms wrapped around her waist, his head resting on her shoulder as he snored softly. Beatrice let out a small chuckle.
“Look at them all,” Beatrice whispered, but Ava could only look at her, “They look like angels.”
Ava saw Mary and Shannon sitting next to each other, far away from the rest, and Ava knew that if she squinted a little she would see they were holding hands underneath the blanket. But Ava wouldn’t point that out, knowing that if they had done it in secret it must mean they didn’t want anyone else to see.
Then, she saw Lilith having her arms around Camila and Yasmine’s shoulders while Dora had her arm sprawled across the three of them, the two other girls supporting their heads on each of Lilith’s shoulders as they slept soundly while Dora’s head was buried on Yasmine’s curly hair. It looked as if Lilith was their protector, and Ava snorted a little because the taller girl pretended to be cool and emotionless and sarcastic, but her heart was too big and full of love.
And then, she saw Michael, Todd and Hans lying on the wooden floor of the family room, their long limbs sprawled around, looking like literal toddlers instead of soon-to-be college students.
And finally, Ava’s eyes fell on Beatrice, who was already looking at her.
“Stargazing?” Beatrice wondered, the TV’s light letting Ava see how the girl’s eyebrows were arched.
“Stargazing.”
Ava unwrapped herself from JC’s gentle embrace, guiding her boyfriend’s body all the way down to the couch so he was laying across it. He let out a little snore, Ava and Beatrice biting their lower lips as they tried not to laugh, and then they made their way outside to the backyard porch, closing the door so they wouldn’t disturb their friends.
“Are you ready for prom?” Ava wondered, hugging her waist as a slightly cold breeze bathed the space, and Beatrice half smiled at her.
“Am I weird if I’m not really that excited?” Beatrice said, and Ava looked at her in surprise, “I just want to get over with it, graduate, and let summer officially begin.”
“Do you think you’ll be named Prom Queen?” Ava wondered, and Beatrice arched an eyebrow at her, “We were at the top of the polls, you and me.”
“Hmm,” Beatrice frowned a little, as she looked up at the stars, and the full moon, “Will you get jealous if I have to dance with JC?”
Probably. But I would be jealous of JC, because he’ll get to slow dance with you while the room is watching.
“Nah,” Ava waved a dismissive hand, “I think he would rather dance with you than me, honestly. His feet will make it to Mike’s party intact, that way.”
Beatrice laughed, and Ava remembered as the girl had tried to teach her how to dance, while the rest of their girl friends were in hysterics as Beatrice was desperate, and Ava was unable to get one single step right because she was too busy focusing on the way the girl’s hand on her waist felt, the way she was holding her other hand gently, their faces so close. How Ava had almost combusted into flames when it had been just them before the rest arrived.
“You’re going with Mike, right?” Ava then wondered after Beatrice was silent, smiling up at the sky, the girl humming at her, “As friends?”
“Yeah,” Beatrice frowned at her, “What else would we go there as?”
“I don’t know, since he asked you…” Ava shrugged her shoulders, and Beatrice wrapped a gentle hand around her wrist, bringing her closer to her and making Ava’s heart somersault inside her ribcage.
“He wanted to ask Yasmine,” Beatrice lowered her voice to tell Ava, “He told me.”
“So why didn’t he ask?” Ava frowned, which was something she didn’t find surprising at all since the two of them were good friends, and she had the faint suspicion Yasmine had a crush on Michael.
“First of all, he was embarrassed,” Beatrice chuckled, “Second of all, Randall from Yasmine’s and mine AP Calculus class asked her before Michael could. She said yes, tired of waiting for him, I guess.”
“Randall?” Ava frowned, “Since when is he interested in Yas? JC would’ve told me.”
“Since their Computer Science Marathon, apparently,” Beatrice explained, and Ava let out a small sound of understanding. After all, if Yasmine’s team won the National Programming Championship was because of her magic fingers.
“So you’re going as best friends, then?” Ava asked, once more, and Beatrice looked at her.
“As friends,” Beatrice corrected, “I only have one best friend.”
“My bad, I forgot,” Ava put her hands up, Beatrice watching her with an incredulous look but laughing anyways, “But I bet every boy in school would’ve loved to go with you. Better go there with Mike, than anyone else you barely know.”
“Right,” Beatrice cleared her throat, and Ava saw her blushing slightly like she always did when they talked about boys.
Beatrice, in their four years at school, had never really dated anyone. She had gone on dates here and there, but the girl had never been in a relationship or anything similar to that. She always said she would have time for that later in life, complaining how boys their age were pretty immature, something JC, Hans, Michael and Todd always agreed on.
Ava, though, had secretly cheered whenever Beatrice came from a date and dropped by Ava’s place, complaining about how excruciating it had been while they shared ice cream and she tried to talk about something meaningful, but the boys she went on dates with were only interested in one thing, and every time Ava thought about that, about a guy trying to kiss Beatrice, she felt repulsed and angered by the idea. Thankfully, Ava knew Beatrice would aikido into submission that guy if he tried to do something she didn’t want him to do. After all, she wasn’t a black belt in several martial arts disciplines for nothing. And the boys she dated knew it, so Ava secretly celebrated it when she asked about kisses, and Beatrice simply scowled at her, letting her know no kissing had happened at all.
Ava didn’t know why, but whenever Beatrice was in one of those dates and Ava didn’t get an update text in a few minutes, her mind always wandered in the worst case scenario and she felt her stomach hurting like it always did before a big exam, or a big play at school. And when Beatrice came back, scowling and complaining, Ava felt relaxed.
She didn’t know what she would’ve felt like if Beatrice, like her, had dated one of their guy friends or any of the other dude at school. She was way too good and intelligent for them all, Ava had told Beatrice several times, and Beatrice laughed, letting her know she wouldn’t date any of them even if they were intelligent or whatever. She just didn’t have time for that, with soccer and everything else.
“Aves?” Beatrice then said, after a few seconds, looking slightly nervous.
“Yeah?” Ava breathed out, recognizing the expression on Beatrice’s face. It was the emotion that had invaded JC’s face when he first asked Ava out on a date almost two years ago, and Ava felt her stomach twisting slightly.
“I have something for you,” Beatrice said, turning around to look at her.
The moonlight was hitting the girl’s face, painting it in a pale color that made Beatrice look like the most beautiful sculpture ever created by men. Her eyes were slightly wide with nerves, her lower lip was trapped between her teeth, her brown hair was falling down her shoulders, and her golden cross necklace was glistening on her sternum, the golden jewelry Beatrice always wore like that necklace or her small hoop earrings or the few golden rings on her hands matching perfectly with the sun-kissed tone of her skin, the caramel color of her eyes, her dark brown hair.
“You do?” Ava asked, remembering she was supposed to answer, “I said no gifts.”
“And you know I didn’t listen,” Beatrice smiled at her, and then she put a hand inside her OCS Saint Melanie’s green jacket with the white wide sleeves, a soft yellow B embroidered on her left breast, and when she pulled her hand off there was a small bag made of dark cloth resting on her palm, Ava not knowing if it was black, brown or dark green in the darkness of midnight.
“Happy birthday, Aves,” Beatrice said, her words almost drowned by the midnight breeze, blaming it for the Ava’s body filled with goose bumps as she reached to grab the small bag, and her fingers brushed against Beatrice’s usually warm skin, always contrasting with Ava’s cold one.
Her best friend watched her carefully, her hands behind her back, chewing on her lower lip nervously as Ava opened the bag and pulled out the silver chain from it, letting out a small sound of surprise, as her eyes looked back up to Beatrice.
“Look,” Beatrice pulled out her phone, and turned on the lantern, “Read this,” the girl said as the light hit the small plaque on the bracelet.
Three thousand miles won’t break us.
Ava didn’t know what to say as she read the inscription at the back of the small silver plaque uniting the two chains, the front decorated with A.L.S., Ava Lucia Silva. She recognized Beatrice’s elegant handwriting on both sides of the small plaque, her mouth gaping and her eyes stinging with tears as Beatrice sighed in relief.
“It’s so you can remember when you’ll be in Stanford and I’ll be at Harvard,” Beatrice explained to her, trying to fill the silence as Ava’s words failed her, which was funny, considering she wanted to major in Journalism and English Literature and wanted to make writing her whole life after university, “It doesn’t matter if we’re worlds apart, Ava, you’ll always be my best friend.”
“Bea,” Ava shook her head, two streaks of salty water falling down her cheeks, and she wrapped her arms around her best friend’s neck, Beatrice immediately pushing her closer and supporting her chin on Ava’s shoulder, “Thank you.”
“I love you, Ava,” Beatrice said it casually, like a best friend would do, and Ava closed her eyes as she remembered the lyrics of a song she had listened on her way home from the match, feeling grateful her aunt and uncle were driving her and she had her headphones on, because if they had heard the hidden meaning behind the lyrics, they would’ve stopped the car and questioned Ava.
When we’re saying “I love you”, I mean it different than you do.
“I love you too, Bea,” Ava said, and Beatrice squeezed her closer, and Ava feared the words sounded a little too real, that they revealed more than she wanted Beatrice to know, “Thank you for being my best friend.”
*
Beatrice’s parents had hosted a small pre-prom dinner in their backyard reserved only for their daughter’s friends and their families. They had taken pictures, as a group and individually, with their prom dates, the boys with the boys and the girls with the girls, and then with their parents. The backyard was massive, filled with all sorts of flowers, a fountain and white statues that were kind of creepy at night, the massive white colonial style manor looming upon them all.
And through it all, Ava found it hard to breathe.
Beatrice had decided to wear a pastel yellow dress, her hair in an up do style and her natural dark chocolate waves more defined than ever. Beatrice’s dress color fit perfectly with her golden jewelry and her natural sun-kissed skin, with her caramel eyes and her dark brown hair.
Every single part of Beatrice looked like it had been carefully created, her round and kind face, her strong body form, her elegant hands, her plump and beautiful lips, the color of her skin, and hair, and eyes. It was so hard to look away, for Ava and every single guy at school, and Ava couldn’t help but feel jealous already as she imagined all eyes falling on Beatrice. Not because they wouldn’t be looking at her, at her lavender dress and the way she had styled her hair, but because they would be looking at Beatrice and Ava wanted Beatrice all for herself, and no one else.
“Aves,” JC said, putting his hand flat on her uncovered back as Beatrice’s eyes landed on her, looking slightly at his hand’s placement, looking away as she nodded and smiled at whatever Camila’s parents were saying, “Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” she stammered a little, clearing her throat and turning away from Beatrice to arrange his lavender colored flower on his chest, Ava wearing the same around her wrist, “You look very handsome tonight.”
“And you’re the most beautiful girl in this backyard,” JC said, and Ava felt relief when the smile appeared naturally, when the warmth spreading around her chest felt natural, the weight of Beatrice’s bracelet a little bit heavier on her wrist.
“Lying is a sin,” Lilith said, drowning a glass of champagne that had been meant to be for the adults in the backyard, the ones who were older than twenty-one. She was wearing a midnight blue dress, the material hugging her slender body in all the right places, and her long raven black hair was styled in elegant waves. Her jewelry was silver, matching with blue stones here and there, and Ava didn’t want to know how much money Lilith’s parents had paid for that look. Though Ava was sure they wouldn’t miss it at all, being CEOs of two enemy companies as they were, their love story kind of weird but it fit Lilith’s whole aura perfectly.
She and Camila, Mary and Shannon, had decided to not get a date for tonight. They would go there as friends, while Ava and JC would surely be the couple of the night, or maybe Beatrice and Michael would, while Todd and Hans danced away with their own dates, Yasmine spending time with Randall, Dora not attending because she was a year younger than them.
“You look pretty too, Lilith,” Camila said, rolling her eyes as her red dress looked extremely beautiful on her pale skin, her lips painted red as well, her dark eyes and curly hair standing out, the girl reminding Ava of a vampire.
“Thanks, Cam,” Lilith put a hand on the girl’s shoulder and Ava wondered if her cheeks, as red as Camila’s dress, were blushed because of the alcohol she had secretly been consuming, “You’ve always been the realest.”
“What about me, guys?” Yasmine said, crossing her arms upon her chest, covered by the pastel pink material of her dress as the girl had decided to straighten her curly haired mane, reaching lower than her backside.
“You look perfect, my dear,” Mary said, wearing a white dress, her hair still braided, trying to impersonate Beatrice and Lilith.
“More than perfect, you look majestic,” Shannon snorted, saying her emerald dress was a representation of the school’s color, her soft brown hair falling down beautifully as a small green diadem pushed her fringe back, leaving her beautiful and sharp features in full view.
“Are they trying to impersonate us?” Beatrice wondered, walking back to them all, standing between Lilith and Ava.
“And failing miserably,” Lilith smiled, and Beatrice snickered like she always did when she and the taller girl united their forces, and suddenly became the Queens of Mean though there wasn’t even a mean bone in their bodies. But, as the eldest of the group, they had claimed the right of being able to make fun of everyone else and come unscathed. Different to Lilith, though, Beatrice always looked apologetic one minute after being barely mean to any of them.
“Time to go, ladies,” Michael said, waving a hand, wearing a grey suit with a pale yellow shirt underneath and a yellow rose on his left breast, matching the one Beatrice wore on her wrist, “Car’s here!”
Beatrice’s parents had rented a limousine for them all, arriving at the hotel where prom was being held in their full glory, Ava feeling as if they were part of a royalty elite friend group arriving to a royalty elite party or something.
Ava knew their group of friends was probably the most popular one compared to the other groups. After all, JC who was the school’s guys’ football captain and its quarterback, Michael who was the school’s male lead actor from the drama club, Beatrice being the soccer girls’ team captain, and Ava occupying the chair of the president of the student council and the drama club’s lead female actress were part of it, plus Lilith who had been born being popular and Camila and Yasmine, who charmed everyone’s hearts, and then Mary and Shannon who were a pretty intimidating duo with Todd and Hans were also part of the group, so it was bound to happen when the crowd parted like the Red Sea and entered the room, greeting and smiling as if they were their subjects, though Ava knew they probably gossiped and talked immeasurable amounts of shit behind their backs..
“God,” Beatrice complained, surprising Ava because her best friend never used the Lord’s name in vain, “Thankfully this will be over soon, the waving and pretending I like everyone in this room.”
“Yeah,” Ava said, her heart breaking a little as she thought about that, “Being a celebrity’s hard, isn’t it?”
“Hey,” Beatrice looked at her, apologetically, “Sorry I couldn’t talk much with you back at my place, you know how my parents are and how much my mom likes to drag me around and brag about me and Harvard and all.”
Ava didn’t mind it. Wherever Beatrice went, all eyes were on her. Including Ava’s, who loved to be a spectator, watching Beatrice charm everyone like she had charmed Ava four years ago and, if Beatrice ever decided to continue her parents’ legacy but most importantly her mother’s by picking up politics, she knew she would probably end up in the White House.
But Beatrice had other plans, she wanted to study biology and then go to medical school. She wanted to be a doctor, travel around the world and help people, mostly children, and then open up her own little medical office and offer her help to whoever needed it. Meanwhile, Ava was planning on becoming a writer, her aunt and uncle wanting something more for her but knowing that if Ava’s mind was set, there was no convincing her otherwise.
“It’s fine, Bea,” Ava chuckled, “You were busy being your parents little superstar.”
“Hmm, yes,” Beatrice sighed, and Ava knew the girl didn’t really like all of that, being the centre of attention and all and, during the campaign, she had given several speeches as well as she had talked in front of the school during assembly, cheering on the soccer team, giving end of season speeches during junior and senior year when she became the captain of the team.
Ava knew Beatrice hadn’t like the whole “political speeches” thing, but her mother had needed Beatrice and her husband’s help for her campaign, giving an image of a tight knit and loving family, putting into practice all Evelyn Wang preached about. It wasn’t really hard to do, though, Ava knew that while Beatrice’s mother wasn’t the most affectionate woman in the world, she loved her only daughter fiercely, and so did Beatrice’s father, who was probably one of Ava’s most favorite people ever.
“Come on,” Ava said, waving JC over, who was talking with his football team friends, “Let’s go dance the night away.”
Ava tried hard to focus on JC instead of Beatrice dancing around with Michael. She knew there was nothing more but friendship between the both of them, camaraderie too since Michael moved into this town a couple of years before Beatrice did, being Jillian’s son and all and also having an important role in the school’s life. The both of them and Lilith had found common ground, sharing a country, being new in the group, sharing an accent the rest made a lot of fun of because they all talked very posh, but still Ava’s heart hurt a little as she watched Michael making Beatrice laugh, and snort in that way that made Ava feel butterflies, a way that only Ava had achieved to ever do according to Beatrice’s parents.
“Come here,” Ava said, turning around to look at JC, plucking her lips and making him laugh out loud as he gave her a small kiss.
“Dummy,” JC said, but his dark eyes were filled with love and Ava felt her stomach knotting, as she tried to focus on her steps, on following JC’s moves, turning off Beatrice’s laughter or the way in which she supported her head on Michael’s shoulder as she bended over while laughing, Michael’s hands flat on the girl’s back, saying something only Beatrice could hear and, apparently, was the funniest shit ever.
At some point of the night, the DJ told everyone to gather close to the stage because it was time to announce the Royal Couple of the night. The hotel’s ballroom filled with whispers of who would it be, the odds being between Ava and Beatrice, Michael and JC.
“Good night, everyone,” Jillian said, standing tall behind the microphone, “The moment all of you have been waiting for all night has finally arrived. First, we’ll announce who amongst you all will be crowned king. Second, we’ll announce our queen because the best part is always left for the end.”
“Yes, ma’am!” Camila said, making everyone in the room laugh, included Jillian and Coach Duretti.
Ava was laughing too, until she felt someone grabbing her hand, and when she turned around she saw Beatrice looking down at her, excitement in her eyes.
“You’ll be the most beautiful prom queen, Ava,” Beatrice said, and her eyes looked down on her lavender dress. And Ava told herself the tinge of red on Beatrice’s cheeks was because of the alcohol all of them had secretly been passing around, or maybe it had been caused by the dancing and the heat of the room.
“After counting the votes, our 2024 prom king is…” Jillian stopped for a dramatic effort, opening the golden envelope, and smiling, “Our beloved JC Alves!”
The crowd erupted in cheers, Ava and her friends applauded and hugged JC, who smiled shyly and waved his hand, kissing Ava on the cheek and making everyone coo at them both.
“See you up there,” he whispered, squeezing her hand and making his way up the stage, crouching a little as Jillian put a silver crown on top of his black hair.
“Now, for our 2024 prom queen…” Jillian paused once again as she opened a silver envelope this time, JC standing a few feet away trying to catch the name of the queen, as Ava felt Beatrice squeezing her hand, smiling down at her, and she almost didn’t hear her name as she got lost in her best friend’s eyes, “Ava Silva!”
“Ava,” Beatrice laughed, dropping her hand to hug her, “I knew it!”
“Oh, whoa,” Ava let out a small chuckle of surprise, as Beatrice hugged her tightly, “You’re not jealous, right? This won’t ruin our friendship?”
“Come on, now,” Beatrice raised Ava’s left hand and tapped the bracelet, and Ava remembered how Beatrice had put it on after she struggled to clasp it, how her fingers had brushed the inside of Ava’s wrist, how twenty-four hours later her wrist was still burning with the ghost of Beatrice’s touch.
“Right,” Ava said, smiling at her best friend, as people cheered and applauded her.
Ava started to walk towards the stage, smiling and nodding here and there before ascending the stairs, Jillian greeting her with a hug and a pat on her back before she put a silver tiara on top of her head.
“Congratulations, you two,” Jillian said, her voice drowning the cheers and applause as JC took Ava’s hand, and the both of them bowed, silly smiles on their faces, “Now, you might have the King and Queen dance.”
JC took Ava’s hand, gently, and smiled down at her with reassurance, knowing Ava wasn’t scared of facing a crowd since she had been in the drama club for four years. But she didn’t have the best coordination in the world, either, and dancing while all eyes would be on her was something Ava wasn’t much thrilled about.
“Right, left,” Beatrice said as the girl had suggested they practice Ava’s dance once more after the rest of the girls had left, “One, two, three, one, two- ouch, Ava!”
“Oh my God,” Ava gasped, bringing her hands up to her mouth as Beatrice winced, but her eyes danced with amusement, “I’m so sorry, Bea!”
“That’s okay,” Beatrice chuckled, offering her hands again, “Come on, you were doing great,” but Ava knew that was a lie, because she had trouble concentrating as she felt Beatrice’s hand flat on her back, the other one suspended in the air and holding Ava’s hand, guiding her around the room as she taught Ava how to waltz.
The student body, and the teachers, all formed a circle in the middle of the ballroom as the lights dimmed down, one theatre light falling directly onto the both of them. Ava, breathing deeply, fixed JC’s lavender flower on his breast pocket and he smiled down at her, one of his hands resting gently on her waist, the other one holding Ava’s right hand as her left hand was on JC’s bicep, his shoulder too high for her to reach.
And then her steps faltered a little as Taylor Swift’s Lover was being sung by Camila’s familiar sultry voice all the way from the stage, the school’s band accompanying her, and Ava remembered the way it was the same song as Beatrice had used for them to dance around Ava’s room.
You suggested it, idiot. Camila and you had planned it all, she would sing it while the prom King and Queen would dance, and that’s why Beatrice played it. So you would remember the steps.
“Whoops,” Ava laughed nervously, as JC was looking down at her with so much adoration he didn’t even notice Ava had accidentally stepped on his foot.
During the last almost nine months, Ava’s chest had been hurting in a way she couldn’t describe every time she started to feel all those forbidden things for Beatrice, the things she had pushed down deeply into her chest and made herself believe were gone. But it was especially painful when JC, unaware of Ava’s inner struggle, looked at her like that. Because while he was guiding Ava around the wooden dance floor, his eyes never leaving her face and screaming all he felt for Ava, all she could think about was that afternoon in her lavender painted bedroom, Beatrice’s melodic laughter filling the space as the sun of late May entered through the curtains.
“You’re such a dork,” Beatrice laughed, the both of them laying on the floor after Ava had lost her balance and had made them both fall, as Taylor Swift’s voice kept sounding but Ava didn’t even know what song was playing, all she could focus on was Beatrice looking at her with an unreadable emotion in her eyes, so similar to the one JC had whenever he looked at her, “God, I’ll miss you.”
Ava remembered to move her feet and follow JC’s lead, as he had a small smile on his lips that then became a grin as Ava’s steps grew more and more confident. JC spun her around, making her laugh, making everyone laugh. And then, for a moment, Ava’s eyes landed on Beatrice, who was already staring right back at her.
And a bottomless pit of confusion opened on Ava’s stomach as she saw the look on Beatrice’s eyes, a look that lasted only a second before the girl saw Ava was staring at her, replacing it with a smile, and a nod, letting her know she was doing great.
But as Ava was lying naked next to JC that night, spending the night over his home after Michael’s prom after party, the look on Beatrice’s face was still burning deep inside Ava’s mind, and soul.
It had been a look of heartbreak.