Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

From: Tokyo Therapy and Counseling

           31-10, CBD

            Shibuya

           Tokyo

To:  Shibuya Correctional Facility

19, Shibuya Correctional District

                                      Shibuya

                                        Tokyo

Shibuya Correctional Facility

To whom it may concern - 

On behalf of Tokyo Therapy and Counseling (referred to hereby as T.T.C.), we would like to seek your permission for research regarding the psychological effects of the penal system on inmates.

To summarise our approach and our goals, we wish to provide acceptance therapy to inmates who sign with us. In return for that therapy, we would like to gather certain information regarding quotes, CCTV logs of an office space (if you approve) and a summary of their criminal history. We will provide one trained therapist, available Thursdays and Saturdays. We will provide privacy forms and will commit to keeping the volunteers’ personal information (any names mentioned, information that may harm Shibuya Correctional Facility’s good reputation [hereby referred to as S.C.F.] and sensitive details that the inmate states as unpublishable) unpublished. 

We will provide you with updates regarding our interactions with the inmates. The S.C.F. will be published as a major contributor of the final publication and we appreciate whatever communication we share with the S.C.F. Thank you for your time.

• Lead Researcher Takuto Maruki

Chapter Text

Maruki smiled politely to the officers that were showing him the way through. Despite his heart scratching at his throat, he maintained the clumsy and uncalculated appearance throughout the entire procedure. 

Hold your arms up, turn around, hand over your devices, let’s run through some basic rules and etiquette.  

He nodded along, almost unable to hear the information that he was being given as he monitored his own reactions and body language. This was the most high-risk he’d been at since he used his abilities to confirm his place as a registered counsellor. Things happened in blurs like the colours of navy and pale blues shifting from grey hallway to hallway. Even the burning overhead lights threatened to rob him of any saturation, he could only barely notice when the officers stood still. Maruki adjusted his glasses quickly so that he could see more than just blurs - though that had been a product of spacing out during a procedure he’d heavily researched beforehand. 

“Here, Doc. Warden Maeda’s going to line up everyone who has an interest for you. I don’t know if you needed privacy for whatever selection process you were going to do but… With her, I just suggest going her way. These prisoners don’t really see the light of day much outside of the fence so don’t freak out if some are over interested.” The warden who stood closest to Maruki laughed, a hearty older man who folded his arms behind his back. Maruki laughed a little too, wanting to match his energy a little bit to show that he wasn’t nervous. Like a liar. 

Then a shorter woman came back and Maruki realised why things usually went her way. She was shorter than Maruki, maybe by a horizontal hand’s worth? He didn’t have much time to process how tall that actually was when her resting scowl and rigid movement paused at Maruki’s side. Another warden stood behind the line of prisoners, blocking off their escape if they wanted to fuck around and find out. Despite Warden Maeda’s presence, a lot of the prisoners spoke amongst themselves and formed a wobbly line. There was no correction to the straightness, which Maruki came to appreciate - agitation would lead to very little communication. 

“Hey, yeah it’s nice to meet you! I’m Doctor Maruki, representative of-” And the introduction he practised so much was finally running out of his mouth. Prisoner after prisoner, paper after paper, sometimes it didn’t go well and the prisoner stepped aside to be taken back to their cell and that was fine. Then it came to someone in particular, someone he had noticed just before it was his turn to talk with Maruki. Someone who stood fairly still, didn’t speak to the others as much, even though his body language showed that he was fairly relaxed. 

“Nice to meet you, Doc. I’m Tohru Adachi, representative of cell 146, block B.” Adachi smiled, holding out his hand for Maruki to shake. Maruki took his hand, shaking it as he explained more about his project - at least, details of it that he shared in the letter he sent before. Adachi stayed still again for another while, showing his attention with eye contact rather than nodding along. After a while he did start to nod, taking the pen Maruki provided with his hand to scribble on his clipboard the details that Maruki needed. 

“Right, so I’ll be coming back on Saturday to come see everyone again. I’ll usually be coming around on Thursdays and Saturdays so if you can help it, keep your schedule free for me! I’ll be able to send back a time schedule to the staff so that you know what time to expect me.” The number of interests was small but it lit Maruki up, happy to have anything right now. Adachi laughed a little bit, shaking his head briefly before he spoke. 

“Okay, see you then, Doc-” Adachi stood aside to watch the rest of the interactions with the two remaining inmates and brought his hand to his mouth, lowering his voice in the process. “And watch out for that last guy, he's got a… Short fuse.” The guy in question’s face went from shock to rage, but he managed to keep himself from saying anything in retaliation. They have a history, I guess. Maruki sighed, smiling awkwardly as he spoke with the next person. Then the final person, whom Adachi insulted.

“Hey, and don’t trust what that other guy was saying. He’s always looking for a reaction, just zip your mouth and keep your head straight. Jeez.” The other inmate shook his head in disapproval. 

“Thank you!” Maruki smiled, though he didn’t make it clear what he was thanking that prisoner for - it was more of a polite exit to the scene, he could already feel the tension like cords under his feet and he really didn’t want to be involved. He said his goodbyes and went along with the two wardens that had been accompanying him to a small room, with a desk and three chairs. He remained standing as the warden, whose name he didn’t yet catch, explained.

“This is the office you’ll be using. This is usually the psych’s room, but we’ve shuffled his schedule around so that you two can share.” The warden gestured for Maruki to sit, and he did. The wardens, awkwardly in Maruki’s eyes, stayed standing - he wished they would sit as well as they went through the usual rules again, like If you feel like you’re in danger do this and don’t be afraid to say names . 

“I think I’ll be okay. Thank you, Officers.” Maruki beamed, though it fell flat. 

“Wardens. I mean.” He looked meekly to the table as his words became quickly overlooked. He was going to think about that mistake every time he came into this room now. 

Luckily for Maruki, Saturday came swiftly afterward. With a binder full of his materials set carefully on the table, Maruki pulled up the camera app on his phone to use as a mirror to make sure that he was presentable. I feel like respect is going to be a major factor here… He frowned a little at his own face. Have I done anything to earn that respect yet? I felt a bit like a robot the last time I was here, going through the motions. His face darkened when he remembered the words he last spoke in this room. I thought I stopped thinking about that! No! 

Then there was a knock at the door, the sound of a smooth cloth scratching against the door. Maruki stood up straight, turning his phone off and somehow managing not to drop it in his mild panic as he reached for the door. The door opened before his hand could reach the handle and the edge met with the side of his cheek, causing him to shut his eyes and step back. Warden Maeda stood still for a pause, processing what just happened. Then she smiled, brows furrowing together as she seemed to suppress her need to laugh. Maruki smiled sorely, holding his cheek as he greeted her and the guest who stood behind her - the inmate who picked a fight (and failed) the other day. Oh, this is not the best scenario for ‘respect’. Maruki’s heart shrivelled up, but he maintained his appearance enough to go through the formality with her. When she finished telling Adachi the rules, she shut the door and stayed outside. 

“Damn, Doc. Turns out the most violent thing in this prison are the doors, huh?” Adachi laughed, taking one of the seats so that Maruki would do the same. Maruki followed suit, realising just how different this was from the high school counselling he was doing before. Nothing in this room was really ‘his’ in the sense that the space assigned to him in the high school was technically his to use. He couldn’t bring in any extra snacks, comfy cushions, nothing. Even the chairs were hard, like they had endured years of use and the stuffing was compressed into pucks for them to sit on. At least Adachi seemed comfortable. 

“I know! I’m not surprised, though. None of the prisoners yesterday seemed violent at all.” Maruki opened the conversation, switching into work mode as he spoke. He knew what he was targeting straight away, after all there were only a couple of things that stood out to him yesterday. 

“Hm… Yeah, I guess so. Then again, there were three, four wardens in the room. Imagine having three, four bosses in the room with you right now, you’d behave too, right?” Adachi kept his smile, shrugging as he spoke. Maruki nodded. 

“I really would, you’re right. Though, if I can ask - does that mean that you know them to be violent?” It wasn’t accusatory, but more of a genuine question. Adachi seemed to like that question by how he leaned in. It’s all coming back to me now. Forget what the room looks and feels like, body language and the words he speaks are important. I want to know you first, then I can help you.

“Ferocious! Nah, not really, don’t worry. Violent to me, not you.” Adachi still had his smile, though the words threw Maruki off. Violent to ‘me’, not ‘you’?

“Mister Adachi, are they assaulting you?” Direct language is best right now. Adachi watched silently before he responded. 

“Yep. It’s fine, though. It’s cooled off, more than when I first came here, that’s for sure.” He spread his arms out, resting them on the chair as he leaned back. Maruki frowned, reaching for his folder. Adachi spoke again fairly quickly when he saw that was about to happen, which made Maruki stop. 

“Hey, mind if I ask what’s in that folder anyway? It’s not my record, is it?” His smile still remained. Maruki had to think for a little before he spoke about it. 

“Oh, well… Yes? But that’s not really everything in there. Your record’s not this big, right?” Maruki smiled, shaking his head. 

“A lot of it is just blank pages in case I need to write anything down. Sort of like - birthdays, changes to your availability, things like that! Maybe some details that I really want to remember, like maybe your family details or your relationships to other people? If you’re okay with that, that is. It just helps me keep on top of everything.” Maruki nodded to himself, thinking that his response was adequate for what Adachi needed to know. 

“That’s kind of creepy, isn’t it? Wanting to know all of that private information, you’re a bit twisted like that, huh?” Adachi again watched him quietly, a small pause. Maruki’s shoulders slumped, but his face stayed the same. Maruki leaned onto the table, controlling each word that came out of his mouth carefully.

“I can understand why you would think so. I don’t think even your wardens have information like that, about your relationships with people outside of the prison. I appreciate your concern as well, but in order to complete the project I need to keep a track of that information. If you’d rather me not know, that’s okay and you don’t have to tell me - it’s not vital, it’s just a helpful tool for me to keep a track of your counselling and it ensures that I don’t get your facts mixed with someone else’s.” Maruki sat up straight again, brightening up a bit as he realised he got a bit too serious there. 

“Oh, and I mean- I don’t even trust my own brain most of the time! Really, how did I get through university like this? Genuinely, please tell me if you don’t want any information to be recorded - you do have a right to protect it. The only information that I need is what I included on the form on Thursday.” Maruki laughed a little, trying to lighten the mood by insulting himself like this. He brought his hand, closed, to his head and gently knocked against it. Adachi shook his head.

“You’re right, Doc. I’m sorry for getting so anxious about it, and you know what? Thanks for wanting to write that kind of stuff down.” Adachi’s smile never changed. It wasn’t something Maruki noticed at first, but after that confrontation he had to think about Adachi’s body language again. Still sitting wide, comfortable with a smile and the occasional look up to the roof with a head tilt as if asking it for answers every time he had a question. I mean, it feels normal. Why do I feel like there’s something off? Maybe I’ve just never seen someone so calmly tell me that I’m creepy before? Maruki laughed softly, awkwardly to himself. He took his eyes off of the table, from which they had moved to after getting caught up in his own thoughts. He fixed his glasses and continued on. 

“No, no, don’t worry. Your concern is valid, and you know, I haven’t had anyone ask me that yet. You’re really attentive!” It was by this point that Maruki realised that he’d been completely turned around from the point that he was trying to catch up to earlier - that Adachi had picked a fight with another inmate. 

“You think so? I was just saying what came to mind. Anyway,” Maruki flattened as Adachi spoke. “Mind if I ask about your whole project more? I wanna know what to say to help you.” He turned his hand over to gesture to the folder again, hereby named ‘the project’. Maruki sat back up straight. 

“Oh, what specifically did you want to know?” Maruki wasn’t so taken off guard as he was curious about where Adachi was leading with his words. 

“What’s it for? The form explained a bit, but I realised that it was kind of vague - I’m sure it’s because you didn’t have a lot of space.” Adachi tilted his head, letting Maruki explain. 

“Oh, so… I’ll start from the beginning.” Maruki nodded, smiling as he looked to the table for a bit of support as he had to iterate this explanation again. 

“I’m researching the cognition of inmates. I want to see how your world view is right now, and how it changes with counselling. You can think of it like the effect of support in a highly stressful situation, right? I mean, I personally wouldn’t want to be in prison- I mean, as a prisoner.” Maruki rubbed his cheek, trying to get his point across. 

“Right, I see. I got bad news to break, Doc.” Adachi’s smile stayed the same as ever. Maruki looked up to Adachi, prepared to hear the worst trauma ever or something to that effect. A few moments passed before Maruki awkwardly added on. 

“What’s the bad news?” He held his hands together under the table. Adachi’s smile widened a little bit. 

“Support’s not gonna help me. If I knew it was just about coddling each other, I’d’ve just stayed in my cell.” Adachi watched him, head tilted slightly to Maruki's direction. It was a small kind of pain, one between strangers being told sad information. 

“Hey, Adachi… Everyone needs support. Even therapists have therapists. I don’t know what you’ve been through… But I want you to know that I’m here for you, even outside of this research. It may take a long time to trust me, but I have a long time for you. You don’t deserve to be forgotten.” He worried that it sounded like empty words, but seeing Adachi remain so still with a small twitch in his brow made it seem like it hit somewhere for him. 

“I am a researcher, but I’m a counsellor first. Alright?” Maruki was only a little surprised by Adachi’s swiftness to those words. 

“Yeah, yeah, I got it. Hey Doc, am I the only one watching the time?” Adachi looked over to the clock in the room. Maruki’s face changed from sincerity to horror as he looked up at the clock, realising that he might have forgotten the time - but it was almost a couple of minutes ahead of what time he thought it was at most. He looked back to Adachi when he started laughing again, dumbfounded. 

“Hey, let’s cut it a bit short for today. You look like you need a break and tea.” Adachi stood up and didn’t wait for goodbyes or ‘see you next week’s. He knocked on the door, and before Maruki could gather the breath to do either of those things, Warden Maeda took Adachi back with a quick ‘excuse us’. It left Maruki sitting at the table, blinking at it as if it was some kind of friend who saw what just happened and could reciprocate his confusion and the burning in his face.

Cognitive Report: Saturday 14th, 20XX - Tohru Adachi

Summary: 

Tohru Adachi is a 31 year old man, currently in prison for charges of 

murder, assault, several violations of his police duty

History of a police officer. That makes a lot of sense now that I’m thinking about his behaviour from earlier today. Even so, it felt different to the wardens at the prison - like the same words in a different font, I guess you could say? 

It seems like Adachi is well-collected and well spoken. It appears that he’s highly educated and has no issue keeping conversation with me, as limited as our time was today. He’s not afraid to ask questions but something he said stands out to me. 

“Support won’t work for me”. I think it was in relation to the project explanation but he doesn’t seem thrilled about the idea of counselling for some reason. I think I should work on my wording and review the form I put to the inmates earlier this week for any comprehensive errors, though I feel like I stated that counselling is going to be… Kind of the whole thing. I don’t think other prisoners had any trouble understanding the project but it’s possible that they kept any confusion to themselves. 

In order to really get a sense of Adachi’s heart I need more time. I couldn’t manage to get any information from him today. I think that’s what I mean by ‘it makes sense’. He’s an ex-officer, he’d know questioning stuff like the back of his hand, right? I likely went into that conversation completely wrong. Maybe the questions put him on alert? 

His crimes contrast his appearance. It’s almost hard to believe for me - okay, well. Compare it to the social position of an officer and it sort of makes sense. If I took that context away, the behaviour Adachi exhibited was generally 

playful? If I sat in his place, his words would come off that way. I felt challenged at the time, but maybe he was just trying to get me to relax? Then I took it seriously and then he felt challenged. I would leave early too. 

I need more time. I have too many questions. I’ll work something out. I need to keep practising, I need to know what everyone wants. I need to talk with more people.

Chapter Text

Now, what would I want if I was a client in my office? Maruki’s brows furrowed, reflected in the beady eyes of a stuffed bear. After checking the label of the toy he discovered Junes’ brand on its side. Maybe it’s too clown-like? A lot of people have a fear of clowns... He frowned, checking it over. It showed some time of wear and tear but it was still fairly good given its loved condition. Do therapists usually do this? Do counsellors usually do this? He set the bear down and moved on, looking for something else that could bring some professional comfort to his space.

Along that path he found three cushions, one a third-wheel due to its different style but it still fit relatively well despite being so different. He held them in a stack in his arms while he moved around the store. Well, cushions are nice. Those chairs are pretty hard, so this will make it feel better to sit on. He slowed in his tracks when he came across a carpet wrack, seeing a cute rug with ‘ welcome home ’ printed on it. He shuffled closer and took the edge of the carpet with his hand, lighting up when he realised where he could put it in his office. Everyone loves carpet. Come on, how could I pass this up? I’m sure the other guys will love this! 

He soon realised the problem though. His hands were full, and the rug required both of them to be free. Oh shoot. Maybe if I… He tried to bring the cushions to one arm, but he couldn’t wrap up the rug like that. He rubbed his cheek, trying to figure out what he can do as he debated for ten minutes between different ideas. He almost contemplated leaving the shop when he came close to a window viewing the street outside of the shop. That works! The cushions were set aside as he ran to the shop across the street.

He came back with a skateboard sling. He managed to roll the rug up and slipped the straps onto each end, then he tucked the carrying strap onto his shoulder. This is so useful! I can carry so many rugs with this. And a skateboard, but… I think I’m a bit too old for that now. Do the inmates have skateboards? No, of course they don’t. That’s stupid. He embarrassed himself in the palace of his own mind. He shook his head and took up the cushions with his now free hands and came to the front of the store to purchase them. 

“Will that be all, sir? Do you need help carrying any of that to the car?...” The cashier stared at the rug set up for a few minutes before shaking their head slightly, looking into Maruki’s eyes instead. 

“No, no. That’s okay, I caught the train today. Oh…” He paused for a few seconds, realising how much space he would take up on a train like this. Maruki tried not to show how dejected he felt in his face, though he did it through his voice. 

“Well, that’s okay. They do say the longer we wait may it be the sweeter kiss , right?” That only got him what felt like only more judgement from the cashier. He ducked his head into the cushions to avoid his shame. 

He spent the rest of his time apologising to people on the train, walking sideways through alleyways and hallways until he reached his own apartment. He struggled for the key. Come on, it’s here somewhere… Once inside the apartment he took the time to wash and dry the cushions. He stared at his new rug with a newfound apprehension, realising that he could not in fact wash the rug. It was too long to fit in the washing machine comfortably. 

I’m sure they won’t mind. I’m sure the thrift shop already gave it a nice wash… He smiled awkwardly at it, as if he was apologising to it or the future shoes that were about to trample upon it. He held the bottom of his palm to his mouth while the gentle thumping of the dryer kept his apartment alive, sort of like a heartbeat. Was this all a bad idea? No, but all of the offices I see in the movies… He paced a few steps, backwards and forwards and he shook the nervousness out of his body.

Will they even accept something like this? Through the security line. They can’t be used to hurt anyone, though, okay I can see how the cushions would work against me here… But come on, a carpet? The only thing that can happen from that is carpet burn, right?.. The light reflected upon his glasses as he stopped his pacing to stare out of the window. 

I only use my powers for the better of the people. I need to keep that in mind. And this IS for the good of the people, it’s to make sure that my clients feel comfortable in my office. If they don’t feel comfortable, I can’t get information, and if I can’t get information, I can’t help anyone. And if I can’t help anyone, my goal is good for nothing. It’s not good enough for me, it’s not good enough for Rumi. I need to contemplate this thoroughly before I-

. . . 

The security line was fast today.  

“Oh, thank you so much. I appreciate the exception, I promise you that these cushions will stay on the seats!” Maruki beamed, waving to the security guard as he wandered into the facility. 

Maruki stood at the entry point for his office. He looked at everything with judgement in his eyes, as if the inanimate objects were likely to insult his family at any minute. In his hands he held a cushion he found and cleaned from the thrift store but he wanted to make sure that what he’d gathered so far was in theme and comfortable from the eyes of a prisoner. Nothing childish, just comfortable and professional items. His shoulders loosened up as he decided that this was the final change, setting the cushion in one of the seats and dragging the other to the corner of the room. This will be a space for us to share. I just hope I’m not stepping on my coworker’s toes here…

He nudged the rug he brought with him a little closer to what he thought was centred in front of the door. I’m sorry if I am, but no one will feel comfortable in an environment that feels like the principal’s office. He looked up at the clock, having been more aware of it since he was tricked last time by one of his clients. He sat down on the guest side of the desk and opened his folder up, quickly reviewing his notes while he still had the time to. After about ten minutes a knock came from the door, and he stood up to greet his client like usual. 

It had all become very much routine now, at Shujin’s academy and here in the prison. He was always great at asking questions but never any good at talking to someone outside of it - a contradiction of a counsellor. Thursday came and went, then Saturday arrived like the sun through the crack of curtains. 

“Adachi, it’s nice to see you again!” Maruki was more surprised than anything else, especially after how the session went last time. Adachi hummed quietly, nudging the edge of the rug with his foot while he looked around. He flipped the corner over before he went on, leaving Maruki to fix it as he sat down. 

“It’s good to be back. Looks like you changed up the place, Doc - is the other shrink gonna like that?” Adachi didn’t turn his head, but he did watch Maruki come in front of him to sit down on the other side of the table. Maruki reached for the back of his own neck as he walked through his own actions again in his head. I feel like this question has come up a few times.  

“I’m - not a psychiatrist. But, I guess if they don’t like it, we can play tug of war with the layout of the office?” Maruki smiled, finding comfort in the solution - which was to avoid the problem for now. 

“You know what, that’s always an option I guess.” Adachi sighed, leaning back into his seat as he covered his mouth with his hand. Maruki brought his hands together and rested them onto the table, and it stayed quiet for a few moments. Adachi looked him up and down before he spoke up, uncovering his mouth to leave his hand dangling off of the arm of the chair. 

“As much as I love the silence, Doc… It’s not much of a counselling session if you don’t give me anything to go off of. I dunno what to say to you.” Adachi shrugged with a smile. 

“But hey. I get paid to be here. Do you?” He added on. Maruki sat up straight when that question came out, then his shoulders slumped for a minute or so. 

“I guess I don’t. But that’s okay! I’ve got work in some other areas of the city, it’s no big deal to help my university with this research!” Maruki nodded, deciding that his response was good enough. Adachi’s eyes seemed to light up, so it made Maruki feel more comfortable, like he said something interesting for Adachi to go off of. 

“Right, about that. You wouldn’t happen to have a research grant, or some kinda funding? You said university but you’re a licensed counsellor? Has your professor been holding you hostage for a decade or something?” Adachi laughed, shaking his head. Maruki leaned into the table as he spoke, noticing his own mistake but keeping to his words.

“To be honest… It’s something that I have a personal stake in. As an alumni I felt like I needed to do something about it. Even if I don’t get any payment… If I can prove that this works, I feel like it can help a lot of people. That this counselling works.” Maruki looked up to Adachi, having realised that he’d buried himself inside his own mind again - but he was surprised to see a kind of discomfort on Adachi’s face. Like pain, again. 

“But you don’t get anything out of this, do you? Come on, you’ve gotta be getting paid something to put up with us like this. No one wants to be here. Not even the people who get paid to be here, it’s a punishment for everyone. It’s a punishment for you. ” Adachi was talking a lot more today. Maruki sat back up straight as he contemplated what Adachi said. 

“It’s not a punishment to be here with you. I chose to come here, by myself. If I didn’t want to be here, I would have already walked back out. Adachi, I apologise if this is a pointed question but… Do you think it’s a punishment to sit here with me?” Maruki relaxed as he found his footing in the situation again. The smile was gone from Adachi’s lips and what was left behind was a dull look and a furrow in his brow. 

“I’m in prison, Doc. I have been for years. They treat me like shit, then they tell me it’s okay to have some kind of therapist after kicking the shit out of me every once in a while? Since I got transferred here I’ve felt nothing. Nothing. Are you kidding me? Having someone who isn’t even being paid to pretend to care about me, I’d rather just be stuck in my cell all day. Since when did I want this? I signed up because I thought you’d just tell me to man up or something, take your future by the horns! ” Adachi gestured with his hand, clenching it and unclenching it as his voice took on a sarcastic tone. 

“Then I could at least have some fun in messing you around, but you’re earnest . You’re a freak, you know that?” Even with the acidic words coming out of his mouth, he stayed still and relaxed, his body language showed that he was bored. Like he knew nothing bad would happen to him. And he was right, Maruki just stayed quiet in shock. Adachi looked him over again before turning his head to sigh. 

“You can’t even say anything. This system is so hypocritical, why doesn’t the government stick its penal system up its ass?” He stayed still. Everything he said indicated that he wanted to leave and stop talking, but the fact that his body remained here in the room was itself contradictory. 

“Adachi… I’m sorry. I knew nothing about this.” Maruki began, but it was shot down fairly quickly by his client. 

“You’re not sorry. You can’t apologise because you’ve got nothing to apologise for. What you’re actually feeling is pity where it isn’t needed. Isn’t this what worthless criminals like me deserve? This is the rules of this world bullshit I was fed, isn’t it?” Adachi stood up. Maruki stood up as well, checking the clock as briefly as he could. 

“Adachi, I’ve upset you. That’s why I should apologise. You’ve made it clear that you’d like to leave, and you’re free to do so. All I ask is that… You please come back next time. I can tell that you have a lot of emotions building up right now and it’s hard to talk like this. I’m sorry.” Maruki tried not to show the pain through his face, but his hand gripped the corner of the desk tightly. Adachi stared for what felt like a few minutes, what could painfully be mistaken for hours, but all he could do was turn his head and knock on the door. 

“Jeez, Doc. Go cry about it or something.”

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 21 20XX

Adachi seems to have complicated feelings about counselling. 

During today’s session he came to be very upset over the contradiction between the prison’s treatments of him. I should have asked more questions but

It’s important to note that this has happened twice in a row. I changed my interaction with him. In the first session I felt like I asked too many questions and found that his answers led away from the subject that I wanted to talk about. This time I tried staying quiet to see how he would fill that silence, but that didn’t work either.

It could be because he has training as an officer in the field. It’s likely that he’s questioned others before and he seems to recognise the overlap of our professions. It also felt like 

He didn’t like the way that I was treating him in either session. It’s okay that he doesn’t seem to like me. I want to find a way of communication that suits him best, but any time that I show interest in him personally he seems to become defensive. I’m not really sure why as of yet. I still need more time to learn about Adachi.

In fact, Adachi is the only client of mine who has been notoriously difficult to talk with like this. He came off so friendly when he was signing the forms, but ever since he walked in 

I just remembered that he said that he came here to mess with me…

He must be lonely. He said something before about the other inmates treating him terribly as well. I don’t know anything about the visitation rules here in the prison but it feels like no one has come to see him in a while… 

I need to help him. I can help everyone if I can just do this right. If I fail here… 

I need to try my power the next time I see him. I’ll tell you (me) how it goes. 

Chapter Text

Maruki stared at the report warily. His chest was tight with the sense of duty he felt, like a toy key that was trying to bend further than the gears could take him. He leaned back against the wall of his bed, taking a slow breath in and out. He did that for a few minutes, controlling the way he felt. There’s nothing to do if I feel anxious like this. This doesn’t help anyone, Maruki. A familiar feeling joined him in the room, like the world had become two layers and he was sitting on both when he stayed on his mattress like this. His face scrunched up, realising that there was another person - or, sort of person? To witness his moment of weakness.

“They do not yet understand our goal. Do not be disheartened. I feel your fury, as much as I do your fears.” The creature, faint and pale like a ghost, towered over the bed. A kind of being wrapped in its own tentacles, a stone expression carved into gold that remains pristine even now. In the darkness of the room its eyes glowed down to Maruki. 

“I know.” It was all Maruki could spit out, but his heart spoke more to his persona than he could with his words. 

“ Actualization is at hand for your world. You must grow used to our power. Do not falter now. The fools who remain blind to your revolution will soon too become swept away in your ideal world.” The creature leaned back - as much as a coffin-cross looking thing with tentacles could. The centre piece tilted a bit, as if looking up to the sky. Even though the words were spoken in a way that was hardly emotional or sympathetic, Maruki still felt comforted by that idea. A smile crept upon his face, but when he looked up to find the creature it was gone. So was the ‘double-layered’ feeling that he had before. 

“Yep… I’m not crazy...” Maruki sighed, sitting up straight. He crossed his legs and held his laptop between both of his knees while he reviewed the files he just created. Here’s the ones from Thursday… And here are the ones from today. He flicked through them, the sound of his plastic mouse chirping away as he clicked. Wait a minute. He paused on Adachi’s page. But then… He flipped back through three other reports. Adachi’s has way more content in both reports. He found Adachi’s most recent report again. It’s true. Where everyone else has maybe three paragraphs, he has double that, give or take. 

He wasn’t quite sure what to do with that information. He double checked himself and sure enough, Adachi’s contents put the others to shame. Why? Maruki looked up to the roof as he thought, reflecting on both sessions between them. I haven’t even gotten that much information out of him. Both sessions have ended in failure. Why does he have way more written? Have I just been negligent of the others? That thought worried him a lot. He checked through each of the other files he wrote, taking the time to read them thoroughly.

No… This is as much as I could have written without stretching the details out. Then I see Adachi’s, and even with the incomplete sentences, the things I’ve written are… Maruki covered his mouth in a kind of horror. It’s pretty personal. It tries to be professional but it just breaks down. He was stuck at what to do, flipping through different reports again, trying to convince himself that he was wrong. It never worked. Why does it go off like this…? It took him a while to think about it. He had gone off to make dinner, come back with a bowl of rice and some stuff he found at the bottom of his fridge but even while he did that his brain was now fully occupied. He shook his head, sighing. It’s probably because I still haven’t gotten a lot of information about him. While everyone else tells me directly, I’m stuck analysing words and body language.

Maruki sat on the edge of his mattress, his brain stuck in a permanent red alarm as he realised just how unprofessional he had been these last few weeks. He flipped back through his notes again, seeing how unfinished and awful his notes actually were in comparison to the calm and collected ones he made for other inmates. Adachi’s not that nice to me. It does make sense that my notes run on longer like this… Doesn’t it? He found himself questioning it. The little shadow men in his mind palace were running around, dropping and picking up papers, running into each other and generally losing all trains of thought. Have I forgotten about Rumi here? Why isn’t anything working out?  

Maruki looked at the rice bowl and frowned, his stomach rumbled despite the lack of interest in the food he just made. I should be outside of work mode by now. And yet, every time I go to take a break, I remember Rumi in her hospital bed… The pain crept up into his face. It informed his next action, someone who knew who Rumi was before he found his powers and saved her. His fingers found the contacts in his phone and he stood still, waiting for his friend to pick up. I’m sure he will put my head back on straight.

“Hey, what’s up, Maruki?” A familiar voice came over the phone. Maruki smiled a little, running his hand through his hair as he pieced together his thoughts into his voice. 

“Hey Shibu, are you free tonight by any chance? It’s been a little while, you aren’t busy at home or stuck at work, right? I probably should have texted you before I called…” Maruki laughed a little, strained as he tried to control the way his words came across. There was a bit of silence before Shibusawa responded. 

“Nah, nah. Don’t worry about it, I’m good to go out right now. Am I meeting you at your apartment or halfway?” Maruki sighed, seeing that Shibusawa had already caught on that something was up. I wish I could control myself better. Maybe that’s the root cause of all my problems right now.

“Let’s meet halfway at…” He took his phone from his ear to double check his bank account before he said anything else. 

“Maybe that diner. Do you know Bikkuri Boy?” Maruki shuffled over to the bowl of rice that he hadn’t yet touched and moved into his kitchen to cover it up so that he could put it in the fridge. 

“Yeah, I’ll meet you there. See you soon, Maruki.” Shibusawa was pretty quick about ending the call. Yeah, he knows that I might have just gone on about it if he let me. Maruki took a slow breath in and sighed, accepting that he couldn’t back out of this now. Shibu will help me… I just don’t want to bother him about something like this.

Maruki took his keys and wallet and made his way out the door. It wasn’t too far to the train that dropped him off in Shibuya, where a lot of his steps had been lately. Wandering through the night time crowd, he found himself inside of the warmly lit diner - a place filled with comforting food and comforting memories. Maruki found out that he made it first and claimed a booth, sitting closer to the wall. As the minutes ticked by the anxiety in his heart grew. I should have just given the session one more try before I freaked out like this. I feel like Shibusawa might not even want to talk about it. He was becoming more and more conflicted about what he should tell Shibusawa and how he would go about it.

“Hey, Maruki. Are you good? You’re doing that thing where you look at the table, is there some conversation I’m interrupting?” That familiar voice was back. Maruki sat up straight, his heart leaping at the chance for a change of subject. Shibusawa!  

“I’m okay! How are you? Was the traffic busy?” Maruki stood up to greet Shibusawa. The other man smiled and shook his head, tucking his hands into his pockets while he spoke. 

“Nah, it wasn’t too bad. You’re the one catching trains during the Psychotic Breakdown Incidents . Don’t tell me you ran here and forgot?” Shibusawa sat down, causing Maruki to do the same. Maruki laughed awkwardly, catching on now that maybe it was a dangerous decision to catch a train when he didn’t need to. 

“There hasn’t been another train crash in a while… These incidents have been occuring a bit lately, though. I can’t say that it doesn’t trouble me.” Maruki frowned, trying to think of the most recent time he heard about an incident like that. Nope, none that I can think of. I really need to pay closer attention to the news…

“Yeah, not like the incidents last year. It feels like it’s ramping up this year… Just be careful, alright?” Shibusawa turned his head toward the wait staff, causing Maruki to do the same. The conversation resumed after they ordered. 

“Oh, so do you mind if I ask you what’s up? I’m glad that you’re not going to be drinking this time.” Shibusawa added, setting the menu back in its holder. Maruki froze for a few moments before he brought a hand up to his cheek, feeling the conflict in his head return again. Should I just talk about something else? Would he even know if I just started talking about something unrelated?

“So… It’s kind of a long story. I’ll start from the beginning…” Maruki took a glass of water and sipped from it while he collected his thoughts. 

“I’ve been… Pretty stressed lately. It feels like every chance I have to relax, I just think of Rumi again.” To be fair, this IS a concern of mine. Surely he wouldn’t notice… Maruki’s shoulders deflated when he thought about her, though. Shibusawa sighed slowly into his glass, only knowing half of the story. He set the glass down and folded his arms.

“You really loved her. It’s okay to still feel pain about it. I really hope she recovers fully, at her own pace.” Shibusawa nodded to himself. It feels like he might want more information. How can I work around this?  

“I know. Her pain… I don’t want her to suffer anymore. I see it reflected in my work - I want to help people, but I…” Maruki shook his head slightly, trying to keep his heart and his head calm.

“I see some people who are suffering in their own way, too.” Maruki sat up straight, deciding that it was best to end his line of thought there. The waitstaff came with their food and both men briefly thanked them before continuing. 

“Yeah, I can imagine it’s tough. Unfortunately, isn’t that kind of what it’s like for a counsellor? I feel like you need a therapist or some counselling too.” Shibusawa smiled, though it was more solemn and less upbeat than he usually was. Of course. It’s a different kind of pain to see that your friend is going through something that you can’t help.  

“Yeah, it is. It’s par for the course… I wish I could just - Take their trauma and put it in a box. If everything is stuck in that box, none of it would be able to bother them, it would be taped shut and left in their closet or under their bed, so to speak.” Maruki laughed a little, awkwardly as he realised he was coming way too close to telling Shibusawa about his powers. Switch the topic, Maruki!

“That would be good, but I guess that means it’s still there, huh?” Shibusawa nodded, looking off to the side like he was genuinely considering what that would mean. I guess he’s not wrong. Maruki paused for a few moments before continuing on.

“It would be better to throw the whole box away, right?” Maruki smiled, appreciating Shibusawa’s stance a lot. Shibusawa smiled and shrugged.

“I guess so, yeah. Where is all of this coming from, though? Have you had a particularly rough crowd at the high school lately?” He was keeping it lighthearted, though that did remind Maruki about something. I completely forgot to tell him that I work at a prison as well now… How do I put this to him?

“Actually, I… Picked up a second job?” Maruki smiled awkwardly, watching Shibusawa’s reaction fade like a ghastly memory. 

“Don’t overwork yourself! If you need money or something, tell me now so you don’t get sick! Damn it, Maruki… You’ve always been like this, haven’t you? What will I do with you?” Shibusawa’s attitude completely changed. It was scolding, of course - but it was a sign that he cared. It wasn’t as if he was really yelling at him, he was just condemning that behaviour.

“I don’t need extra money. It’s more like - volunteering, I guess?” Maruki rubbed the back of his neck, realising how many lies he’d need to make up just to keep his abilities a secret. Shibusawa sighed slowly again, leaning onto the table.

“Okay, but seriously. Don’t overwork yourself… Unless you’re a… And you know, there’s nothing wrong with that!” Shibusawa wasn’t going to say that quiet part out loud, but Maruki immediately caught onto it.

“No! I am not - Shibu, I’m not… Why would that even - Isn’t my confusion enough evidence that I’m not?!” Maruki’s face started burning again. I’m not a masochist! Shibusawa started laughing, just gently as the situation started to diffuse. 

“Okay, okay. Let’s chill out for a second, Mr. M. Just remember that it’s not all serious and don’t be afraid to drop that volunteer work if you need to. You’re already doing so much for everyone else, don’t forget that you deserve some nice things too.” Shibusawa tucked his cutlery onto his plate. Oh shoot. I haven’t even finished my food, he’s completely taken me off guard!  

“Yeah… Thank you, Shibu. I’d appreciate it more if you didn’t steal my appetite before you said that.” Maruki joked with him, relaxing as he put more effort into finishing his food. Shibusawa smiled again, shaking his head while he folded his arms. 

“You’re the one who connected the dots.” Shibusawa laughed at Maruki’s face, which looked up at him with such judgement and betrayal. 

“Says the one who set the dots up in the first place.” Honestly. I’m pretty lucky to have a friend like Shibusawa regardless, though. My chest feels much lighter than it did before.  

Their time together ended pretty soon after, after general goodbyes and ‘see you soon’s. Maruki came back to his apartment and flattened, seeing his laptop on his bed left open and losing battery. It was the only light on in the apartment, though the context of what it meant wound Maruki up a bit again. I just need to edit the report. Maybe cut it down, fix the awful grammar and punctuation… He slowly came to sit next to his laptop. He picked it up and began to work. 

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 21 20XX

Adachi seems to have complicated feelings about counselling. Combining information between our different sessions, it has become clear to me that there is a contradiction between the treatment he receives in the prison between different staff. His sentence spans twenty years and he’s currently doing his fifth year at this time, serving all of his charges concurrently. During this time there has been a push for mental health prioritisation - which changes between rural and city prisons. 

It’s important to note that both sessions at this stage have ended poorly. In an attempt to get more from my interactions with him I changed my approach - other clients in the prison responded well to my usual methods of asking questions that indirectly lead to their inner thoughts, but it appears that Adachi is well versed in environments that involve interviewing or questioning like that. As such, it feels like he can read my intentions with my questions - though why he avoids talking about his thoughts like he does is confusing, for a lack of a better term. 

During the session today I attempted a different method, which involved silence at first. Now reflecting on it, I probably should have started with some light conversation - I do regret it. He took poorly to it, understandably, and questioned my reason for being at the prison. 

It feels like every time that I show any interest in him as a person outside of his life in prison he becomes aggressive and defensive. This is in stark opposition to the results I’ve experienced with other clients in the prison, who are usually pretty happy to talk about themselves outside of their sentencing and crimes. As such, I see that I need to spend more time with Adachi to better understand the way that he would like to approach the sessions.

There is an overhanging feeling of loneliness that I get from Adachi’s behaviour. I’d like to investigate that feeling and find a way forward with him that allows him to feel safer in my office.

Chapter Text

Maruki was pretty focussed today. He had been all week, there was this feeling of finally having snapped out of the desperation that he felt. If there was a kind of fog in his brain, it finally cleared and left him alone. When I collect enough evidence for my research it will become more known, that’s the best thing that I can hope for right now. There’s no need to worry about Adachi when every other participant is helping me get closer to the answer. 

As per usual there was a knock on the door - Maruki stayed still, looking up to the door as Maeda led Adachi into the room. She nodded politely and shut the door, not saying much of a word as Adachi came in, smiling warmly. 

“Adachi! Please sit.” Maruki smiled back, worriless for the first time since they first met. Adachi sat down, tilting his head for a few seconds before he spoke. 

“Giving it a third shot, huh? I sure hope it’s not gonna be as awkward as time.” It appeared to be a joke. Maruki laughed a little, shaking his head.

“No, I hope it won’t be either. I should really apologise for upsetting you… I should have thought more about my behaviour and it was entirely unprofessional of me.” Maruki held his hands together loosely in his lap. 

“Uh… Yeah, thanks.” Adachi rubbed his cheek, looking off to the side with a pause. His behaviour right now is a bit different than it was before. I’m not sure what’s going on now… Maruki held his breath when Adachi started talking again. 

“So, anyway. I’m done running now. As it turns out, I do have a situation you could help me with. Wanna hear it?” Adachi smiled again, shrugging as he spoke. His hand returned to dangle off of the edge of his chair. And now this is what I’ve seen before.  

“Well, you can talk about whatever you want. If you’re giving me the option, can I assume that you’ll hear everything I have to say?” I feel relaxed. I think it’s because my resolve has settled into one element - I want to test my ability on him. I just need to know what he wants, otherwise I won’t be able to do anything helpful.  

“Sure. So I’ve got this annoying counsellor-” Adachi laughed, shaking his head. I nearly had a heart attack! Maruki held his chest, sighing as silently as he could while Adachi went on.

“Just kidding. I’ve been getting visits every month lately. It’s this kid from a town I used to live in, he’s the nephew of an old partner I had.” Adachi paused for a few seconds. He looked up to the roof, as if asking it for advice. He seemed to settle his thoughts when he came to look at Maruki in the eyes.

“He’s had a freakish effect on me. Every time I see him, I remember how I was some years ago. Yeesh, talk about embarrassing memories. It’s the kind that could keep you awake at night.” Adachi laughed again, though it was quieter this time. Is he actually opening up?.. Why is it so hard to tell now?

“I see. Don’t be afraid to stop talking if you feel like it’s too much…” Maruki nodded along. A dull look came over Adachi’s face. He held his hands out and splayed his fingers outward, Maruki could almost hear the irritated ‘ why ’. The room was quiet for a few seconds before Maruki brought forth an awkward laugh. “I apologise. Please continue, Adachi.” I should just keep quiet. It feels like interjections don’t actually encourage Adachi to keep talking. Maruki was trying to keep a track of all of this in his head. He was worried that even moving might cause Adachi to withdraw right now. 

“The last I saw him outside of prison… I guess I was able to keep my promise to him. I’ve been pretty bored in prison, though.” Adachi sighed. I recall. I recall very well that you’ve been bored. Maruki kept that thought to himself.

“Even so, I wasn’t expecting to start getting visits from that kid. I really thought he’d just leave me to my peace while everything’s already been said and done. It’s been fuckin’ weird, to say the least.” Adachi looked over to the folder. He then looked back to Maruki, tucking one leg over the other as he spoke next.

“He’s got that hope that you do. The power of bonds or some shit, am I right? Ugh…” There was a kind of tension in his jaw as he shut it. He seems to be kind of debating on telling me something. He’s usually very direct and to the point.

“And my old boss has been visiting me sometimes too. Usually when he comes up to meet his nephew, I assume. It’s been real odd to see him grow up the way he has. He has a job and goes to college now. On top of that, he’s almost the same as he always was! I feel like I hammered into his head how the adult world sucked ass, but he seems to be actually enjoying himself. Glad someone is. I guess he’ll find out soon enough once the college fees get to him.” Adachi gently kicked his leg, looking at his knee as he thought. 

“It’s been making me think, Doc. Maybe connections aren’t so bad.” Adachi’s leg was still moving, though his brows were furrowed. Yeah, I can imagine how uncomfortable that is to say now.  

“That’s great, actually.” Maruki smiled, relaxing. So he has opened up to me. This is some really nice progress.

“It’s true that connections to people help a lot. It would be better if the trauma never happened at all…” Maruki nodded to himself, figuring out where he was going with this mid-speech. “But they help us forget for a moment. Sometimes they can even show us the way forward. I think you should treasure what makes you feel connected to people. The fact that you were capable of coming to this conclusion yourself speaks lengths to your introspectiveness.” Maruki laughed a little at Adachi’s reaction, which was one of confusion and disgust.

“I’d rather not, thanks. I’ll just hold onto them for now. You know, has anyone said you care like a bitch yet, Doc?” Adachi kept watch of Maruki. I feel like I finally understand you, Adachi.

“Not yet, no. You’re probably the first person to think so. Can we come back to connections for a second?” Maruki didn’t think so deeply about that jab. He was homing in on that specific point. Treasure your connections, Adachi.

“What more’s there to say about it?” Adachi’s eyebrows furrowed again as he leaned down onto his knee. Alright, we’re set up now. Hey, if you can hear my thoughts - now is the time! Maruki still wasn’t entirely sure how to refer to that being that had been helping him so far.

“If you’d like to be accepted by people more often, shouldn’t you show them how valuable their time is to you?” The world came back to a familiar feeling. A fuzzy, thin blanket splayed its warmth across the floor, the desk and separated Maruki ever so slightly from his chair. The double-layered feeling he sought was here, and he was so focussed on his Actualisation that he barely realised that, instead of blending in with the first layer of reality, Adachi stayed perfectly visible. There was silence, and Adachi showed a bored look on his face. 

“That’s just embarrassing. Are you listening to yourself? Do you actually take your own advice or is that licence just for show? Come on now.” Adachi began to laugh, running a hand through his hair. What happened? Can you hear me? Hello? Maruki sat still, dumbfounded. The double-layered feeling vanished, and he was left alone in the cold reality once more. What went wrong? Did something go wrong? He didn’t take the advice.  

“And look at your face! Wow, I wish there was a mirror in here! Did I catch you so off guard that you couldn’t keep up your little facade anymore? Oh, honestly. Thanks for the laughs, Maruki. It’s been fun.” Adachi stood up. He paused again for a few seconds before he came to the side of the desk Maruki was on. He took the corner of the desk to lean down and look him over, causing Maruki to snap out of it and turn his face from him. Shoot, I wasn’t paying attention. What’s happening now? He’s closer than I realised.

“Ah, what the hell. You look like you need a break, Doc. Same time next week?” Adachi stood back up, shaking his head with his regular smile. Huh? Oh, the time… Maruki looked over to the clock behind Adachi’s head.

“Yeah… I’m sorry, I think I must have forgotten something important.” Maruki frowned, looking at the desk as if it would help him. There were another few moments of silence but this time it was unpalatable. I still don’t know what happened. I need to know. A slow, creeping feeling of dread presented itself before Adachi turned for the door, but his hand knocked the folder off of the table.

“Oh, crap. Sorry, let me get that for you…” Adachi seemed to be more relaxed now that it felt like the conversation was over. He gathered everything that fell out of the folder, just some loose bits of paper and a pen. He smiled again before handing it over to Maruki. 

“Thank you, Adachi. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have left it so close to the edge of the table.” Maruki shook his head, trying to move the thoughts out of his head. I just need to end this situation as fast as possible so that I can really think without feeling like I’ll be caught at any second…

“It’s no big deal! I shouldn’t have ripped my hand out like that when I was turning around. Anyway, I’ll see you around, Doc.” Adachi turned to the door and knocked. Maruki opened the folder gently to see if everything was back in its right place, and it seemed like things were generally as they were. He fixed a few pages which slightly showed their heads outside of the plastic sleeves that contained them, and that was it. Maeda came to the door like normal and walked Adachi out. 

It was then that Maruki felt like he was free to show how exhausted he was with his own thoughts. He put his arms out over the desk, keeping his folder in his lap while he sighed. It really didn’t work. What happened? I feel like there’s so much to unpack and I don’t have the capacity to do it right now. Adachi’s reaction was no surprise - he really doesn’t seem to like anything to do with people getting close to him. But if he’s admitted this so far, doesn’t that mean that he feels close enough to me to tell me that? Maruki frowned, the thoughts were playing bongos on his brain and he didn’t like it. I can’t even tell how much of that was the truth. 

I’m just shocked. I need to move. If I get some fresh air, maybe I can run through things again… Maruki took up his folder and dragged himself through the jail. I don’t get it. My thoughts keep spiralling - why did that happen? He squinted when the sun hit his face, blinded for a few moments as his eyes adjusted to the outside world. 

Did I miss something?

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 28th 20XX

I felt like I was so close to helping Adachi. He finally opened up to me a little today, but I tried my ability and it failed. Why?

I’ve been at a loss for words. Actualisation worked just fine on other inmates, I’ve even received word that they’ve been doing better, thriving in the prison. It’s so contradictory to everything that I’ve established… I suppose this is the life of a researcher… 

I’ll summarise today’s session 

Adachi and I spoke about his past relationship with people from the town he was living in prior to his sentence. He spoke about the efforts one boy has gone through to keep in contact with him despite his criminal record - which was pretty heartwarming to hear. Adachi had problem processing that relationship and said that he would rather ‘hold onto’ relationships than ‘treasure them’, assuming the difference is the amount of effort he puts in. It genuinely feels to me like he’s afraid of letting people get close to him. 

I told him that he should value his time with others and attempted to use my ability on him, but it didn’t work. I’ve been very confused - the being that I’ve been working with doesn’t usually require any confirmation and it works out just fine… I want to speak to it again, but there’s no way to consistently contact it. It comes and goes, sort of like a ghost or a hallucination… haha 

I’m not sure that I see a way forward here… 

Chapter Text

It was the day that his next session with Adachi would begin. Maruki sat at his desk with his laptop, ignoring the fact that this was his break. I can’t leave this alone. I need to work out what happened last week so that it doesn’t happen again. Despite the stakes his heart was calm, he had a plan for either result. If it doesn’t work this time, then it might be something to do with Adachi. If it does work this time, that means that there is an inconsistency in when I can use my abilities. 

Maruki pinched the bridge of his nose, massaging the dents out of it where his glasses stayed, unsuccessfully. That’s if Adachi will let me do that again this time. He loves joking around with me but it really interrupts my progress… He set his glasses back in place and looked up to the clock in the room. Then he realised that the time was also on his laptop, so he glanced down to the corner of its screen. It’s two o’clock. Then he shouldn’t be too much longer. Maruki found his bag and set his laptop carefully inside. He stood and set his bag in a corner of the room away from the desk, to prevent it from being crushed by his or someone else’s foot accidentally. 

It was only a couple of minutes after that when Adachi’s familiar knock happened upon the door. Maruki sat up straight as his client walked in, smiling and waving his hand. Adachi sat down, smiling as well.

“Hey, Doc. I’m sorry, I was a bit late today - I don’t know if you heard anything, but there was a kind of mess down in my prison block.” Adachi rested his arms on the chair. Maruki paused for a few seconds before he answered. 

“Really? Would you like to talk about that more?” What happened that would actually make Adachi late? Maruki’s brows furrowed in confusion as Adachi went on. 

“Yeah, funny situation really. Some dumbass picked a fight with another dumbass, one thing led to another, and guess what?” Adachi smiled, shrugging. He didn’t give Maruki much time to guess - he wasn’t supposed to. 

“Some of the inmates helped the wardens to break it up. Actually, it was more like the wardens looked on as the other guys did the work. Lazy wardens, huh?” Adachi sighed, shaking his head as if to condemn that behaviour. Maruki frowned, thinking about it. 

“I mean, it is their job to make sure that everyone’s safe… But if the others were helping the situation already, then wouldn’t a warden trying to take control make matters worse? I mean, I only have an outsider’s perspective on the matter, but… I think prisons can be agitating places.” Maruki nodded. Hopefully that shows some understanding to Adachi. I don’t want to shut him down, I just want to show the other perspective.

“Hm… I can’t argue with you there, Doc. Prison sure makes me agitated. Doesn’t it make you agitated?” Adachi kept his smile and watched Maruki’s reaction carefully. 

“Oh, no, not in that sense. I can see what you might mean, that I treat this space as a workplace. Nothing has really ‘agitated’ me - it’s actually been quite fulfilling.” Maruki smiled, hoping that this would indirectly tell Adachi that he is worth the time that Maruki comes in to see him for. Adachi hummed quietly as he processed those words.

“Right. Hey, tell you what, I noticed something weird the other day. I guess it can apply to today’s mess, but have you noticed that the other guys have been acting off?” Adachi tilted his head slightly, keeping his eyes on Maruki. They moved only briefly to Maruki’s hands as he folded them over the table.

“Acting off, how? I don’t think I’ve noticed anything…” Not that I’ve seen. What does he mean, ‘acting off’? If he’s saying ‘have I noticed’, does he mean that they’re also my clients? Maruki frowned a little, trying to figure out what Adachi was going to say next before he could say it - but he was drawing blanks. 

“Well, I can’t help but to notice that a lot of those guys see you pretty often. Crazy coincidence, huh?” Adachi laughed a little, light heartedly. Oh shoot, has it been that noticeable? Maruki tilted his head a bit as he kept his facial expressions under control. 

“I don’t think it’s so weird. A lot of people tend to come out of counselling with renewed perspectives, I guess? It kind of warms my heart a little to hear that they might have been the people who helped to stop the fight, too. And, I mean, if it helps at all, I’m glad to be here. Oh, not that I’m being full of myself - sorry for sounding that way…” Maruki wanted to seal his mouth shut. That first sentence would have been enough! What are you doing? He took a slow breath in, trying to calm down. 

“Yeah, you’re probably right. They take all this counselling stuff more seriously than me. I mean, I’d probably be different if I really took your words to heart, right?” Adachi’s smile remained as he shook his head. Maruki relaxed, squeezing his own hands gently. 

“I mean, I would have to say from a professional point of view that it would definitely help…” Here it is, an opportunity to try again. I need to do this quickly. Maruki called forth the warm, reality splitting blanket again. The world seemed to split into two, like it was stereoscopic. Adachi remained fully visible as Maruki tried to call on his power again, only to be met with silence as Adachi kept his eyes open. When the blanket and the effect faded, Adachi remained still.

“Yeah, you’re probably right -” Maruki tried not to light up as much as he felt like on the inside. Did it-? “But I’d really rather do something else with my life.” He then tried not to deflate as much as he felt like he did on the inside. Does he have to say it like that? Maruki gently brought himself back into focusing on what Adachi was saying. It doesn’t matter now. I need to figure out what happened.

“I see. Well, that’s okay, counselling doesn’t work for everyone . I’d like to ask a quick question, if I may?” Maruki came back into work mode. Adachi let his arms dangle from his seat as he waited for the question. Maruki caught on that this was a form of acknowledgement and moved on, despite the awkward gap in the conversation for that moment.

“Have you experienced trauma before? If you don’t mind talking about that.” Is it possible that he just never experienced trauma? Maruki locked his fingers together, clasping his hands over the desk. 

“Huh? That’s a sudden change of pace if I’ll be honest.” Adachi’s expression changed, even if it was small - it was less friendly and more defensive, in a way that his smile vanished. I know this is jarring, and I can’t weave this into our conversation well, but I need to know.

“I know, I’ve just been curious. You don’t have to answer if you feel uncomfortable.” I’ll give him that choice. Maruki kept a watch on Adachi’s body language as he spoke.

“Well, I guess being direct is better than trying to be an annoying bitch about it, dancing around the issue.” Adachi sighed, kicking one leg over the other as he gave a pause to the conversation. His smile came back and he shrugged.

“Do I look like someone who’s been through trauma?” Adachi seemed to return to his previous emotional state. Is this a good thing or a bad thing? Maruki tried to keep up with the conversation, realising that he was now spending too much time trying to think about what Adachi was saying without words.

“Well… I guess this is a difficult question. I don’t want you to take this negatively, but - I mean, yes?” Maruki smiled awkwardly. I now understand my own folly. He did that so effortlessly, turning the question around onto me.

“Huh. How’d you come to that conclusion, Doc? After only a couple of sessions?” Adachi laughed a little as his brows furrowed. Maruki tried not to let the embarrassment swallow his thoughts. 

“I mean… If we go back to some of your previous times here - You’ve been very avoidant, from people. From connections. It’s something you even acknowledged, saying - I think, ‘I don’t want to treasure my connections, I’d rather just hold onto them’. That really stuck with me, and I came to realise that something bad might have happened in order for you to treat human connection that way. So… If I’m wrong, you can tell me that. I know that it’s a lot to just assume, knowing how little we really have seen each other.” Maruki frowned, feeling pretty bad now that he was saying this out loud. Adachi laughed again, shaking his head. It was a little more energetic this time as Maruki turned his eyes back up to look at him. 

“Wow, that’s the lamest shit I’ve ever heard. Oh no, he has no friends! He must have been scarred for life, poor thing! ” Adachi couldn’t help himself anymore, laughing into his hand. 

“Shit, I didn’t mean to laugh - but it’s really hard not to! Is that really your mindset? Oh no… ” He made a frowning face, closing his fist and twisting it near his cheek to symbolise crying. His face lit back up as more laughter came out, leaving that fist on the table for stability. Well okay, just call me stupid next time, I’d prefer that over this. Maruki deflated, watching Adachi. Though… This seems to be the most genuine he’s ever been in this office. It’s a bit nice, seeing him laugh like that. Maruki relaxed, taking a few deep breaths as Adachi calmed himself down.

“Whew, sorry Doc. You’re hilarious, you know that? You’re such a freak. Every time I come here, it’s like I just got given tickets to a circus.” Adachi sighed, smiling wide as he spoke. Maruki shook his head.

“No, that’s okay. I can understand how my words sound to you, but I’m going to stand on that point. I want to know you better, so that future misunderstandings don’t happen. Though, I can hardly call your mindset normal either…” Maruki winced as he realised what he just said. I’m not actually upset. Please don’t think that I’m mad or insulting you.  

“No, I’ve had that said to me a few different ways before. If you’re gonna insult me, you can do better than that. Let’s just agree to say: Both of us are freaks of nature.” Adachi brushed it off. Oh. I am so sorry. Maruki smiled awkwardly, bringing his hands into his lap. It was quiet for a while, enough that Maruki felt the weight of that silence creep into his chest. If by cue he and Adachi looked up at the clock at the same time, though Maruki didn’t notice with the swivelling of his head compared to Adachi’s stillness. 

“There’s still ten minutes, Doc. Are you gonna keep staring at me like a fish out of water, or?..” Adachi smiled again, coming back to square one. You make it very hard to communicate with you, Adachi. Maruki sighed, adjusting his glasses as he sat up straight. 

“No, you’re right. I’m sorry for keeping quiet like that, I did have another question - less loaded, this time.” Maruki got back to it. Adachi hummed quietly, letting Maruki continue.

“You mentioned that you lived in a town before you were sentenced. By the use of ‘town’, can I assume that it’s not a part of the city? That’s also something that I’ve been curious about - I’d like to know more about that.” Maruki nodded to himself. This question should be more positive and still give me some information. Adachi looked Maruki up and down before he spoke next.

“You could be a detective with the logic that you’re using!” Adachi laughed a little, shaking his head. Maruki sighed, now electing for silence while Adachi answered the question properly. 

“I guess I can talk about that. If you know Inaba then you know where I lived before this. I’m going to take a leap and say that you know nothing about Inaba. It’s a rural town, pretty smack-dab in the middle of nowhere - apparently it used to be a town used for coal mining but it was way more agricultural when I got there. If you wanted to see a view, the best you got was a farm field.” Adachi looked at the table for a few moments before he looked back at Maruki. 

“I mean, most rural towns survive by tourism, right? This place has nothing . The best place a tourist could get is Amagi Inn. Even then, that’s just a normal bed and breakfast with some traditional culture thrown in, with the we’ve been running this place for generations kind of shit going on. That’s all Inaba has to offer.” Adachi sat still, watching Maruki’s face. It just sounds like a nice country town. It sounds pretty quiet compared to the city.

“I see. It sounds kind of calming, I think. At least, I think it sounds nice to live there.” Maruki smiled a little. Then I have that information. Thank you for actually answering this time, Adachi…

“Really? It was suffocating. Boring as shit. I guess I’d choose that over here, though.” Adachi shrugged, sighing. There was a very similar expression of pain to the kind that he wore at other times, just mellowed into an expression that could be mistaken as mild frustration. It kind of sounds like he misses it. I won’t say that out loud, though.  

“I can imagine that for you. You always seem to be looking for something, Adachi.” Maruki smiled again, standing up. Adachi’s face flashed very briefly with confusion before he stood up, smiling as well as he returned to the friendly personality he showed.

“Aren’t we all? Well then. See ya, Doc.” Adachi jest, brushing that comment off as he knocked on the door. 

“I suppose so.” Maruki didn’t give it much thought. 

In comparison, what he was giving more thought about was the fact that his abilities refused to work on Adachi. He was back on the corner of his mattress, laptop in his lap as he looked up ‘Inaba’. I really hate to do this, but Adachi is pretty good at keeping his secrets. I just want to know a bit so that I have an understanding of what isn’t working out… There was a bit of guilt in his chest that quickly replaced itself with dread as the first thing that popped up was a news website. ‘Rural Town Returns to Normal as Murders Resolve’, ‘Ex Council Secretary Arrested Under Suspicion of Inaba Kidnappings’ and ‘Missing Teen Found - His Diary Reveals The Truth of His Teacher’s Death’. 

It took a while for Maruki to process just the titles. Then he remembered that Adachi was sentenced on the counts of murder and failure to abide by police behaviour laws. Even so, these talk about three different people. He stared at his screen for a few minutes before he chose the one that sounded most like Adachi - the most recent one. It took him to the news page and a standard article was written.

Rural Town Returns to Normal as Murders Resolve

The town of Inaba was released from its pressure recently as a string of murders came to a close.

Inaba is a small rural town with roots in the mining industry, in recent times transferring into the farming industry as fields of crops appear around the town’s outskirts. In a quiet town like this it was hard to believe that a string of murders could occur the way they did.

The police department for Inaba was following the murders closely since they started early in April last year.

Maruki looked up at the date the report was posted. 2012. That makes sense.

The first victim was popular announcer Mayumi Yamano, who was found dangling from a telephone pole near a civilian’s house. A teenager who witnessed Miss Yamano’s body, Saki Konishi, was also later found hanging from a telephone pole three days later. On the account of these two murders, police detective Tohru Adachi has confessed his guilt under police questioning. 

We will update with more information as it comes out.

# Edited at 5 PM

Inaba Police Department has stated publicly that Tohru Adachi, previous police detective, will be charged for the murders of Mayumi Yamano and Saki Konishi and negligence to uphold his duty as a police officer. According to the Tokyo Summary Court, Tohru Adachi has previously been acquitted for mishandling a weapon and was since transferred to the country town of Inaba to work alongside Inaba Police Department. 

# Edited at 8 PM

Inaba Police Department has publicly stated that Tohru Adachi will be sentenced following standard procedures and will be detained until his case is heard at the Hibari High Court. Both the accused and the police department have denied requests for interview at this time.

Maruki couldn’t move. This is really hard to believe. Adachi is almost charismatic in our sessions - sure, he’s abrasive and rude at times, but to murder like this… His heart had already sunk, his chest was tight like it was being wound up. Tell me that he was remorseful. Tell me that it was self defence. Tell me that it was just an unfortunate circumstance… He took the information he learned from the article to look up the court that Adachi went to. When he found the court case, he opened the recording and could do nothing but sit in horror as he watched the overhead camera. 

There Adachi was, blue shirt and pants with his hands cuffed together. Three judges sit at the opposite end of the room and a panel of lay judges look on as Adachi stands by himself. Someone in a suit sits nearby, arms folded as the case proceeds. One of the three judges asks Adachi if he pleads guilty for the charges of murder - to which, Adachi says yes. Then he’s asked about the charge regarding negligence to his police duty. He says yes. The case is short, only half an hour long as the panel is dismissed and discussions of his sentencing take place. Adachi sits down as his lawyer stands to speak and ask for leniency. 

Adachi hasn’t smiled once, of course, it’s a case deciding whether or not he gets the death sentence or life in prison. He looks around the room, then up at the camera for a few moments. He then turns back to the barristers who seem to be having a pretty intense debate. His chest heaves, as if sighing as he tucked one leg over the other to watch. After all had been said, the judges dismissed Adachi temporarily to speak on their thoughts about the sentencing. When Adachi returns and bows alongside the bailiff as he returns to where he sat before. He remains standing as one of the judges gives the sentence.

“Tohru Adachi, on the charges of murder and incompetency to adhere to police duty, we acknowledge your difficulties concerning this case and your plea of guilt. You are a young man who had no difficulty achieving academic success in your childhood. However, there is nothing to explain your abhorrent behaviour in this case concerning the lives of two young women.” The judge began. Adachi’s hands came to rest on the railing of his stand, his fingers moving as if he was tapping on the wood. 

“In the aggravating factors, victims of the families you impacted came forth with details of these murdered women. In the mitigating factors… There is no clear method behind these murders. You have submitted evidence regarding… Nonsense . Your lawyer has argued on your behalf a lenient sentence regarding your mental health issues. It has become clear through your account of the murders that the defence’s claims are true. As such, you are a danger to society and must be imprisoned - however, within our acknowledgement of your cognitive difficulties, we state that your sentence be twenty years of imprisonment for the murders of Mayumi Yamano and Saki Konishi. In regards to your charge concerning your police duties, we sentence you to five years of imprisonment to serve concurrently. During the course of your concurrency you may not apply for bail.” The judge explained. Adachi leaned onto the rail, the first look of genuine shock that Maruki had ever seen Adachi in. Only twenty years? I would have reacted the same!  

Maruki paused the video and took his glasses off, not wanting to deal with the visual information anymore. He shut his eyes. Twenty years for the murder of a teenager and a young woman. Twenty years when he could have gotten life in prison… His lawyer did plead mental illness as a reason for his actions. The judge said something about his confession being nonsensical? I just have more questions than I can answer now… But they never said what Adachi had was a defined mental illness. Maruki sat up straight. Shouldn’t they have specified something?

Something is wrong with that argument. Maruki exited the video and wracked his brain for something that he could do to get more information. What can I do? If I ask Adachi about any of this, he’s very likely to just shut me down and, in the worst case, stop showing up to counselling. What can I do?.. He looked at the article again. Then he remembered what Adachi had said prior. Oh, could I ask for the visitor's record with Adachi? I think I could try to reach out to someone about - No. That’s going to the point of stalking, isn’t it? That’s definitely information that I shouldn’t have… Maruki sighed, feeling guilt build up in his chest again. He needs help… So badly. I want to help him so badly. Even if it just means that he won’t be a danger to other people anymore. My endeavour ends here if I can’t figure out what happened. Snap out of it, Maruki.  

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 4th 20XX

In our most recent session, I tried my ability again with Adachi. I found that it didn’t work again and asked him clarifying questions in the best way that I could manage. He told me about the town that he lived in before his time here in prison.

I’ve recently gone through Adachi’s court case, which focused on his murders in a country town called Inaba. 

They never described what specific mental illness he was applying for leniency under. 

I’d like more information before I see Adachi again, but I keep thinking back and forth about what the right thing to do is… 

What if my ability doesn’t work on another person? What if it just keeps happening and the information I needed was something I could only get from Adachi’s visitors? What if they become so busy later on that I can never get a word in with them? As much as it is an invasion of Adachi’s privacy… I’m beginning to think that this is a necessary step forward.

Chapter Text

Takuto Maruki <[email protected]>                   Jun 5, 20XX, 9:55 PM

To ShibuyaCor… ▾

Hello there! I apologise for the lateness of this email, but is it at any point possible to have access to Tohru Adachi’s visitor log? It would greatly help my research to get in contact with a family member or that of a similar standing with Mister Adachi as I find I need more details that aren’t immediately accessible from Mister Adachi himself. I again apologise for any issue this email has caused. 

Maruki held his breath, swallowing his guilt like it was a terrible shot and opened the PDF. He stood near the window of his apartment, a mug of coffee in his other hand as the sun shone through the window to remind him that another day had passed. This is for the good of everyone. I don’t even know how that managed to convince them, but I’m pretty grateful for it… He stared out the window over the city view for a few moments, taking a sip of his coffee in an attempt to calm down. This is for the good of your clients going forward. If you don’t do this now, how will you fix the issue?

He looked down at his phone, the PDF had finished downloading and opened. Inside the document was a spreadsheet with only two names in the past three months - those were Yu Narukami and Ryotaro Dojima. Adachi said that his boss’ nephew was the one specifically visiting him a lot. That then must be Mister Narukami. He did see that Dojima appeared on the list only once in the last three months - it was close after Easter. That’s interesting. Maybe that’s just a coincidence. He couldn’t help but be interested in that information. And there’s the phone numbers they left. I really hope this doesn’t creep anyone out… Maruki frowned, feeling that worry rise back up into his stomach.

If I just hold that and click ‘Call’, then as soon as it starts ringing I can’t back out! So… Why can’t I do it? Maruki’s thumb stayed shaking over the call button. It was like an invisible force was stopping him, keeping him in a stasis of moving but not going anywhere. He held his jaw closed and took a step backwards, knocking his mug against the tap of the sink where his hand had wandered. He gasped, leaning forward in an attempt to save any coffee that might have split from that action, and found that his phone was making a ringing sound. 

Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. The alarm sounded in his brain and he set his mug down quickly so that he didn’t accidentally burn himself with any of his other frantic movements. His heart dropped and so did his soul, several feet into the ground when the call was answered. Please don’t think I’m creepy!

“Hello, Ryotaro Dojima speaking.” It was a raspy kind of voice that had aged from smoking but not to the point that it sounded painful. Maruki gripped onto the edge of the counter as he brought out a cheerful, awkward laugh as he wanted to find the nearest ocean and jump into it.

“Hi there, Mister Dojima! I’m Takuto Maruki, from-” He was cut off fairly quickly, to his own surprise.

“Oh, seriously? I thought it was weird that I didn’t know the number, but it’s just another reporter. Hey, can you tell your colleagues to leave my daughter out of this? I don’t know how many times I have to say it, but I can and will take you to court for the invasion of our privacy! Do you know-” Maruki covered the speaker of his phone briefly, muffling Dojima’s words as he looked back out the window with a look of despair and depression on his face. When he heard the muffled voice stop he brought it back up to his ear with a shaky smile.

“I’m so sorry… I had no idea that… I’m- Wow.” Maruki struggled to get his words out.

“I’m Tohru Adachi’s therapist.” It’s a small lie, but a counsellor in this situation doesn’t sound like they have enough power to just get this information… I genuinely do not want to go to jail for privacy invasion. I’m sufficiently terrified, Mister Dojima… There was a pause of white static on the other side of the phone. 

“No, I should apologise. I’m sorry for that, it’s a terrible habit from years ago. As it happens, I still get some reporters lately who are trying to ‘update’ the story.” Dojima left it in those words. I feel awful for you… And they’ve been involving your daughter. That’s just terrible.

“I should have spoken up straight away, it’s really not your fault. I might have reacted the same way if I were in your shoes.” Maruki leaned back against the counter, shifting his weight to one side of his body. He kicked one leg over the other as he picked his coffee back up. 

“I actually called to ask if I could speak to you about Mister Adachi’s background history? I’ve gathered all I can from him, but… It hasn’t exactly been an easy task, unfortunately. I mean - lovely to be around! But not really… Talkative.” Maruki laughed awkwardly again. I don’t know how well Dojima knows Adachi, but I thought starting here would be the best thing to do. There was another brief pause.

“He’s like that. I respect that you’re being thorough, but how did you get this number?” Maruki could feel Dojima’s scrutiny through the phone. 

“Oh, I’m the prison therapist. I thought it was necessary in my duty to Adachi as his mental health professional to learn more about him.” Maruki was almost sweating bullets despite standing still. This is actually terrifying. I don’t know how Dojima does it. It’s got to be the tone he uses…

“I see. ‘Necessary in your duty to him’, huh?” Dojima left another pause. Maruki took a breath in to add more, wondering if that was a question. Dojima filled the space again.

“Alright, sure. I’m available this Friday if that helps. If you’re really Adachi’s therapist, I take that to mean that you’re in the city, right?” Maruki lit up, though there was still a lot of hesitation left. What if I just said “Actually, something just came up, bye”? That would still be a way out! Maruki shook his head, trying to relax.

“Sure! Friday, at maybe three o’clock?” Maruki looked back out the window. Well. Now I really can’t go back… His teeth held his tongue captive as he tried not to show how much he was really freaking out. Somehow that was much harder to do behind a phone, where only your voice and noise could be heard. 

“Actually, would five o’clock be okay for you?” Maruki thought about it for a few seconds. Well, okay. I’ll have to grab some dinner in the area then, or maybe on the way back. If I went at five… He looked up the Inaba train station and put his map into route mode to see the time estimation. Three hours. So I need to leave by two at the most, I expect maybe half an hour with Dojima and then three hours back… That’s eight, nearly nine. That’s not too bad, given that I go to bed later…

“That’s perfectly fine.” He paused for a few seconds. Wait, I go to work on-! He almost sputtered out an apology when Dojima spoke next. 

“Great, then I’ll see you then. Goodbye, Mister…?” Dojima offered to get Maruki’s name. He smiled shakily and answered him.

“Takuto Maruki. I’ll see you then, Mister Dojima.” I’ll make it work… The phone hung up, and Maruki stared at the train route he was given with a solemn expression. I can’t believe I forgot. I was stuck in the moment, and now I REALLY can’t back out. Okay, well… I go home from the high school around… Three o’clock. That’s not going to work. He sat on the ground of his kitchen for a second.

In order to leave work early… I’d need to take someone off of the schedule for counselling. Should I just call in sick? No, not only is that irresponsible, if someone really needs help I can’t help them because I wasn’t there. His shoulders deflated as he curled over his phone. But then if I take the day off, I have several hours to prepare questions and excuses why I would need that information… This is sounding more and more like I’m stalking him. He shut his eyes. He tried to calm himself down again, but it was much harder this time as he saw his tasks stacking upon one another. It was only Monday, but Friday felt so much closer than it actually was.

Let me check the staff calendar then. I need to make sure that my ability ALWAYS works. Or mostly works. If it’s a problem I can fix with more information and investigation, then I need to go to this length to do it. I’m sure I could just skip all of my breaks. He ran a hand through his hair as he opened up the staff calendar. In that app there was red text on the Friday schedule. Notice: Day 2 of Social Studies trip for students. If you are not required for work on this day, we will send you an email. Maruki’s heart stopped. He couldn’t feel it anymore as he checked his emails. 

1. Kobayakawa <[email protected]>                   Jun 6, 20XX, 7:00

Dear Takuto Maruki, as Thursday and Friday of this week are both social studies trip days, we have decided that it is not necessary for you to come into work. Thank you for your hard work.

Maruki sighed, feeling all of the stress leave his body through his throat. That’s really, really lucky. I’ve never been more happy to read an email telling me that I suddenly have no work on a specified day. He stood up carefully, stuck on his knees longer than he wanted before he could grab his coffee. It’s gone a little cold. Maruki stared into the beige abyss. 

Takuto Maruki <[email protected]>                    Jun 6, 20XX, 7:34

Hello Mister Kobayakawa! I deeply appreciate your notice. Thank you for your hard work!

Maruki sat on the corner of his mattress, eating some leftover food from the other night for a late lunch. He was taking deep breaths when he could, feeling completely underprepared for the trip he was about to make to Inaba. Friday crawled slowly toward him and he still wasn’t as planned as he’d like to be. Should I make myself look therapist-like? What does that even mean? He dug around in the bottom of his bowl as he contemplated what kind of outfit he should wear. I think smart casual is fine. He’s an active detective is all, I don’t want to seem like a fraud… I did lie a tiny bit, after all. He sighed. He stood up, taking his bowl to the kitchen as he debated in his head.

After Maruki got dressed he stared at himself in the mirror. He did a small turn as he buttoned up his polo shirt. Do I even look thirty three? Nearly thirty four now. He frowned and looked away from the mirror. I don’t want to think about it. Don’t people usually have their life together by now? He sighed slowly, doing up his belt as he tried to keep those thoughts out of his mind. Now’s not the time, Maruki. You have to be a professional really soon. Just don’t think about it.

He followed his phone to the train station and took a seat, thankful that it wasn’t too busy after the lunch time period. Oh, I remembered something. I told myself that I would pay more attention to the news, when I met up with Shibusawa. I should start doing that more often. He brought up the news app on his phone and scrolled through. There’s just weather reports and some features right now. He stopped on one of the posts. ‘Artist Steals Pupil’s Work: a Story of Abuse and Plagiarism’ appeared on the screen with a photo of Madarame and a photo of a black and red card that Maruki couldn’t quite read the details of from such a tiny image. That’s terrible. The train began to move.

Artist Steals Pupil’s Work: a Story of Abuse and Plagiarism

Artist Ichiryusai Madarame who took the art world of Japan by storm was found confessing guilt during an urgent conference nearing the end of his exhibition.

During the conference Madarame confessed his guilt about his crimes regarding plagiarism of his own students’ works. With teary eyes and hesitation in his voice he said “I have committed crimes that are unbecoming of an artist”. He goes on to state “I tainted this country’s art world and even ‘Sayuri’”. 

The artwork ‘Sayuri’ by Ichiryusai Madarame captured the hearts of many around the world with a mystery revolving around the expression of a woman looking toward the bottom left of the portrait. A purple mist covers the lower half of her body, leading many to speculate about what she could be looking at and even more to argue about what the nature of her expression is. 

“How could I possibly apologise to everyone for what I’ve done?” - This is Madarame’s final remark as the conference comes to a close. Many rumour-loving youths pointed out the calling card left by an unidentified group of individuals calling themselves ‘The Phantom Thieves of Hearts’. As shown in the image below, the calling card consists of a tophat icon in the front and newspaper cutouts of letters on the back. Most ominously it states “We will steal your distorted desires without fail”. 

Maruki frowned, looking back over the article again. It’s good that he confessed these crimes. It can’t undo everything that he’s done but I think that taking that step forward was really good. They didn’t go too much into the abuse allegations and that worries me, but it’s probably a developing story…  

He looked out through the window, seeing the city begin to evolve into less tall buildings and more clusters of neighbourhoods, spanning out over the horizon. It’s been a little while since I’ve gone out as far as I’m going to go. When was the last time that happened? High school camp? He smiled awkwardly, not wanting to think about how long away that memory actually was. As an enrichment program we got sent to another country town up in the mountains to learn about the environment and teamwork. We all huddled onto the train with our bags. Shibusawa brought a kind of wired speaker that connected to his phone - he didn’t show the teachers that, though. He played it back in the room we were sleeping in, they squeezed four of us in there. It’s still quite a fond memory, even if I remember tripping into a small river in front of everyone. The teacher had to ditch leading us through the forest to come grab me… He smiled, furrowing his brows as he thought about it. It was my fault for not looking where I was going. I’m sorry, Mister Aoki. 

After much longer, Maruki had to transfer at another train station to keep on route. Soon enough the houses disappeared entirely, becoming sparse bricks in the background as more fields of green and water appeared and went with the coming and going of train stops. Maruki had almost fallen asleep from keeping still for so long. The number of people left on the train came down to only about five others in his train carriage. He stood in preparation for his stop, which came after Higashi Inaba. 

“ Stopping at: Yasoinaba. ” The announcer called through the speakers. Maruki made sure that he left nothing behind as he got off of the train stop. From there he took in his surroundings, standing on one side of the stairs. It’s nice. The air smells nice. He almost forgot how anxious he’d been just a couple of hours ago, feeling the fleeting sun on his face. He looked at the time. Just a couple of minutes until five. I’m glad that I got here on time… He focussed on the task ahead of him and steeled himself to meet Dojima. Oh. Did we decide on a place to meet? He paused. Oh no. The dread hit him like a brick. I don’t know this town! I’ll stick out like a sore thumb here, wandering around like I am! The energy he photosynthesised quickly shrivelled up. 

He took a few steps forward then realised that he would need his phone again to navigate. But navigate to where… He sighed. This really is my fault. I was flustered when I called and I can imagine I only made Dojima flustered as well. I should have done my research. He pulled up the map on his phone and orientated it to the direction that he was facing. That’ll help. So I’m here at the train station… And it seems that a lot of stores are on a street further from here. He looked at his surroundings again. All I need to do is not get lost. He began his walk down through the street. 

It’s kind of quiet. It’s very quiet. Aside from the birds. His worry came back, though he tried not to acknowledge it. Maybe I’m just used to the city’s noises. He kept walking, though by now he couldn’t help but to feel intrusive. It doesn’t seem like a lot of people got off at the train station with me. That means that, at least from that train right now, I’m the only visitor to Inaba… Let’s not think about that so much. He looked up at the sky, which was becoming darker and darker. The street lights switched on after another couple of minutes, just as it hit five o’clock. The cool night air brushed by his arms and began to cool the skin on his face. I hear a car. He stopped for a few seconds, looking behind him as a silver Land Rover slowed down beside him.

“Hey, are you Maruki? The therapist.” A man leaned out of the window, with short dark hair and stubble. Maruki was like a deer in headlights for a few seconds before he sputtered a response.

“Yes, that’s me. Are you Mister Dojima?” How did you know it was me? It just didn’t make sense right now, but it would surely click later. 

“Yeah, I am. Sorry for running late, and sorry for sounding suspicious - but could you get in the car? It’s easier to drive to the main street here than it is to walk.” His face didn’t change to smile at all while he unlocked the car. Oh. I’m just going to hop into another man’s car. Have I been in a shadier situation?... Probably not. But I do trust him… Maruki tried not to show much of a reaction himself as he opened the backside door and hopped in. He paused for a second when he saw a child in the front seat with Dojima, who hadn’t yet said a word. Oh. He’s just picked up his daughter from what I can only assume is an after school activity. He’s squeezing me into his normal routine for me. Maruki tried not to touch the lacrosse stick in the back of the car with him. 

“It’s nice to meet you, Mister Dojima!” Maruki smiled, though he was awkward. Dojima began to drive as he responded back.

“It’s nice to meet you too. Sorry for not saying anything about it earlier, but this is my daughter, Nanako. She just had lacrosse practice, right?” Dojima smiled when he spoke to Nanako. Nanako stayed quiet, glancing at Maruki from the rear view mirror before she muttered under her breath.

“Hi.” It didn’t feel like she was necessarily upset to be in this situation, it just felt like she didn’t want to talk to a strange man that Dojima picked up from the side of the road. I understand, don’t worry. It seemed like Dojima understood as well because the next stop was a street. He didn’t stop at any particular house, but he let Nanako get out of the car and collect her lacrosse stick from the back of the car. 

“You know the way from here. I won’t be too long, alright?” Dojima’s tone was different. It was gentle in his own way, to his daughter. Nanako took up her bag and held her lacrosse stick by her side. 

“Yeah, I do. Bye, Dad.” Nanako shut the door. Dojima stayed for a few minutes as he watched her walk down the street before he got the car moving again. Now that gentleness was gone, replaced with a barrier of protectiveness - as Maruki could again understand. The reporters have been bothering them so much. He doesn’t trust me to see his own house, though to be honest I really don’t want to know where he lives either. Maruki folded his hands over his lap as he looked out of the window. The nighttime darkness grew, and the street lamps’ jobs became more important as the surroundings became shrouded. 

There wasn’t a lot that could be said right now. Maruki debated what he could say to show that he wasn’t a threat, but nothing came to mind. Dojima didn’t say anything either until they got to the main street that Maruki recognised from the map. Dojima parked the car around the corner and pulled the keys out. Maruki prepared to get out, but Dojima’s words stopped him.

“Now that we’re here, tell me honestly. Are you really Adachi’s new therapist?” Maruki looked up at the rear view mirror, only to find that Dojima was already watching him. Oh. I am stuck in this car with a detective who is protective of his daughter. Does he still think that I’m a journalist?

“I am, really. I can probably pull up the letter my company sent to the correctional centre if it would help you feel at ease.” Maruki tried not to show any signs that he was nervous. Because he’s terrifying! He’s definitely in work mode right now…

“Mhm. What do you know about Adachi so far?” What information is he expecting? Does he want to know how much I’ve researched? No wait, would that just make me sound more like a reporter by citing news articles? Maruki took a slow breath in. 

“From our sessions together, it’s clear to me that Adachi shows behaviour that could be best described as defensive. Anti-social in a way, but - it’s not really my job to diagnose him, I’m not saying that he is. In the way that he just doesn’t understand how human connection really works. That could be anything.” Maruki smiled awkwardly, apologetically before he continued.

“Any time that I try to give him advice, he brushes it off. I’ve been wondering if I’ve just been introducing it in a way that doesn’t suit him.” Maruki looked at his lap. Dojima stayed pretty still and it was hard to judge exactly what he was feeling as he watched Maruki in the mirror. 

“Yeah, that sounds like him. And you do know what he was charged for, don’t you?” Dojima kept a stern look. 

“I do. I was informed before our sessions together started and I have access to his criminal record.” Maruki nodded. Dojima looked at something in the view of the windshield, something that Maruki couldn’t exactly see since he was sitting behind him. Then he pulled the keys out of the car and pushed his door open. Does that mean that he trusts what I’ve said? Dojima came around to Maruki’s side and opened the door for him. 

“Alright, then what do you need me for?” Dojima sighed, showing a completely different face now that he was standing in front of Maruki. It’s another kind of pain. Another cause of trauma… The loss of someone you were close to. I know that well.  

“There’s some details about Adachi’s previous life here that I’d like to know… You absolutely don’t have to answer me, I understand that I’ll be asking about some sensitive topics. In fact, you’re free to leave me here if you want.” But please don't. I would understand - but please don’t. Maruki hopped down from the car, letting Dojima shut the door and lock it. It made a small, rhythmic beep before he put the keys in his pocket.

“Right, okay. Have you had dinner yet?” It was a genuine question. No, I’ve unfortunately been on a train for three hours. It’s nice of you to ask, but you don’t have to pay for me.  

“No, sorry. I’ll grab something in the area after we talk, that was my plan.” Maruki smiled, shaking his head. Dojima nodded. 

“Alright, I’d suggest sticking to the main street then. I’d hurry up, though - a lot of these stores shut after dinner time.” Dojima kept a blank face as Maruki’s fell to shock. Oh no, I had no idea… 

“Do you mind if I ask what time ‘dinner time’ usually is?” Maruki smiled awkwardly, realising that it may well be another three hours before he could get a proper meal in. Dojima could only blink at him as they walked ahead.

“Six. It’s five, Maruki.” Oh, that’s right. Maruki laughed awkwardly as he looked ahead, trying to avoid Dojima’s gaze now that he realised that it was a silly question. I’m not a journalist but I AM slow to the uptake. Please don’t judge me too harshly…  

“It’s really not like the city, huh? Things stay open pretty late. Are you much of a night time person?” Dojima turned his head to look directly at where he was walking as well. 

“No, not really. Not an outside night time person. I mainly stay up late if I have any work that needs my attention, but it’s not my preferred schedule.” Maruki nodded, looking behind Dojima as they passed the bookstore. It’s shut. I suppose it doesn’t have to be open for the dinner rush. He looked back to what was ahead of him. 

“Then we’re the same in that regard.” Dojima kept quiet after that. They passed a few more shops before any more words were exchanged.

“Was Adachi much of a worker like that?” I think this is an easier way to go into the questions that I want to ask. Dojima looked over to Maruki for a brief moment. 

“No. If anything he slacked off, took shortcuts, that kind of guy. Always complained about the work too, and about the pay. Threw up at a crime scene once.” Dojima’s words were much shorter when he spoke about Adachi. There’s that pain again.  

“I see. I had a hard time remembering that he was a detective until I looked more into it myself.” Maruki’s tone became gentler as a result. Their walk became an uphill one as they spoke. 

“He doesn’t come off that way, right? Especially the way he is now.” Dojima almost sounded like he was smiling, but when Maruki looked up it was the same focussed appearance that he held. 

“Well, it has been years for him…” Maruki watched Dojima come to a stop outside of another car park. It’s pretty empty at this time of night. I guess it’s for employee parking? Maruki stopped alongside him as they stayed by a street lamp. Their surroundings were pretty dark now as the night finished setting itself up. 

“Then… Did you notice anything odd about him during work? That sounds like such a basic question, and it sounds pointed… I don’t want you to think that you’re to blame here. Adachi is responsible for his own actions, no matter what condition his mind might be in.” Maruki put his hands in his pockets to warm them up. It’s getting pretty cold without the sun. It’s still got that humid summer feeling to it, but the wind does most of the work in freezing my hands.

“Yeah, I know.” Dojima didn’t waste much time when he fished in his pockets, pulling out a packet of cigarettes and a lighter. He pulled a stick out and offered the box to Maruki, who shook his head. He shut the packet and put it back into his pocket again as the sound of the sparkwheel struck the flint a few times before it fully lit. 

“I’ve been trying to stop smoking. You’re free to do that, though.” Maruki looked up to the stars. I can actually see them here… Dojima shrugged as he shut his lighter and put it away. 

“Smarter than me. How old are you again? I get the impression that you’re in your thirties, but you’ve got the energy of someone who just finished college - not to be rude.” Dojima took the cigarette from his fingers, letting the smoke spill out as he spoke. 

“You’d be right. I shouldn’t mess with a professional detective!” Maruki smiled, breathing outward strongly enough that at least most of the smoke wouldn’t come his way. Dojima noticed and turned his head away so that it wouldn’t be so concentrated. 

“I mean, legally I have to ask you not to mess with an officer.” Dojima laughed a little, relaxing a little now as he saw that Maruki was less and less of a threat. I’m glad that you’ve come to trust me now.  

“Of course, I’d rather not. Look at my arm compared to yours!” Maruki smiled, holding up his arm. I look like a chicken compared to you! Dojima smiled and shook his head.

“Right, so don’t do it.” The conversation came to a lull again as the smoke dissipated. It was still leaking from the cigarette, but Dojima hadn’t gone in for another shot yet. Maruki realised that Dojima hadn’t answered the question yet.

“So… I’m sorry to push, but if you’re uncomfortable you can just say no.” Maruki’s hand returned to his pocket. Dojima sighed, thinking about it. 

“Right. Nothing really gave him away, though he always blabbed his mouth about the cases he was assigned to. Even him throwing up at his own crime scene was pretty realistic. I still can’t tell if he was just acting the part or if he genuinely threw up.” Dojima frowned, looking at the ground as he spoke. He threw up at his own crime scene? I mean, that is really weird, isn’t it? Maruki frowned as well, thinking about it. 

“I see. I don’t think I could say either way myself. I can’t imagine why he would if he already understood what happened, but then… It’s very hard to just convincingly do that.” Maruki shut his eyes as he thought about it. 

“That’s what I thought too. That’s why the entire case is weird. It feels like he’s definitely the one who did it, but it feels like some pieces never really fit together.” Dojima took another drag. This time he was more conscious of turning his head away from Maruki while the smoke poured out of his mouth. 

“I thought his court proceeding was odd too.” Maruki looked over to Dojima properly. Dojima looked back at him with a new kind of attention.

“They never described what mental illness that he was applying for leniency under. That likely explains why he never went to a mental health facility instead of a prison - he was never actually diagnosed with anything. I thought about this throughout the past week. Nothing came up on his record as having any mental health issues. That isn’t to say that he doesn’t have any, but they never gave him the proper check before he left.” Maruki nodded to his own words. Dojima sighed quietly, leaning against the lamp post now.

“Yeah. They don’t really need to with a confession like that. Unprofessional as that may be, it was clear he had something going on. He spent days talking about a ‘TV World’, and his confession lines up to something that another person involved in the kidnappings would say.” Dojima folded his arms. A TV World? And the kidnappings, I skipped over that article… Shoot.

“The kidnappings?” Maruki could only repeat that phrase. Dojima frowned as he spoke. Pain slowly welled up in his expression.

“Yeah. The gist of it is, people who featured on TV would go missing shortly afterward. Several people went missing after Adachi’s murders - but they always came back a week, more or less, after they were announced missing. It was strange. According to both Namatame, the kidnapper and Adachi, he would find people featured on TV and assume that they were in some kind of danger. Probably in regards to… Adachi’s murdering spree. So he’d kidnap them and hold them somewhere. I don’t really get a thing about what he meant. Some real nonsense and some kind of drug for them to both be saying the same thing. Call that a collective hallucination…” Dojima laughed a little, but it was slow and quiet. Another puff of smoke rolled over his lips as he shut his eyes. 

“That is an unbelievable story… I can’t imagine how it was for you when you heard things like this.” Maruki frowned, though he didn’t really have a grasp of how he could comfort someone like this.

“Yeah. Well. It’s over now. It’s been shut for years. They’ve accepted that Adachi did it even if the method isn’t clear. To be fair, he had details only the culprit could have known. He was… The last person to see them both. And then he egged on Namatame, who also wasn’t the most mentally healthy. It doesn’t bother me as much now as it did then. It’s nothing to get worried about.” Dojima stood up straight as he looked up at the sky. Then he began to walk down the route they had taken, leaving Maruki to wander with him. 

“Threatening to kill people to make someone else kidnap them… That’s pretty terrifying. It’s hard to imagine Adachi doing that right now. He’s… If I’ll be honest, a bit abrasive - but not violent.” Maruki frowned, thinking about it. Dojima didn’t waste a second adding onto that.

“Because you’re a man.” The conversation went quiet as Maruki realised. Oh. He was a bit… And both of the victims were women… He sat in horror for a while. Things would be worse for me in that office if I was a woman… I’m so sorry for not even considering that. Dojima shook his head and sighed.

“I’m sorry to work you up over it. Try not to imagine so much, otherwise I’ll have traumatised Adachi’s therapist for him.” Dojima had an apologetic look on his face, trying to tack on a joke so that Maruki would cheer up a little. In recognition of that, he gave Dojima a small laugh so that he could calm down too. 

“Of course, that wouldn’t be very helpful.” Maruki joked with him. He found his eyes wandering to a store called ‘Aiya’, and slowed to a stop outside the front. Dojima noticed and stopped a few paces in front of him. 

“Oh, was that all?” Dojima wanted to confirm if Maruki was done asking questions. Maruki stood up straight when he realised that his curiosity and hunger got the better of his manners.

“Oh, no, actually - Just one more question for the night, if you don’t mind?” Maruki smiled awkwardly and apologetically. Dojima tilted his head slightly, offering for Maruki to keep talking.

“Were you very close with Adachi? He always seems pretty defensive when I say something that could even imply him as responsible for a friendship or something like that. I want to know how he made friends here. I mean, it’s apparent that he gets visitors…” Maruki laughed awkwardly as he tried to shut his mouth with the will of his mind. Dojima looked off to the side of the street behind Maruki and back to him before he started talking.

“I guess, in a way. It sounds like him to get worked up like that, oh how dare he be someone who needs it .” Dojima teased that thought. 

“He got sent here unwillingly. He was a bit quiet when he joined, friendly enough that he’d get along with everyone but he wouldn’t come drinking with us, not for a little while. When the higher ups finally decided who he was going to be assigned to as their assistant, he showed me that he was pretty bright. Knew laws like the back of his hand, paperwork would be done quicker than I could manage it. Seems like he grew pretty bored quickly after that because when he realised that it wasn’t going to be as busy as the city he must’ve thrown some sort of fit internally. Then he started complaining about his job, as a ‘joke’. I guess I was always the one to put him in his place, and we got to know each other better like that.” Dojima took one last drag of his cigarette before he leaned down to drop and smash it into the ground with the heel of his shoe. He picked it up and put it in the bin nearby. 

“Being stuck working together is what made us friends. But then he met my sister’s son and it’s like he couldn’t help it. He and I were friends because we were stuck together for work, but I could find Adachi hanging out with the kids a lot since Yu arrived… My nephew.” Dojima’s look became more stern and defensive. Maruki couldn’t help what he said next. 

“Yu Narukami?” I should have kept my mouth shut! Maruki winced as he heard his voice back in his head, just quietly echoing Yu Narukami’s name after that point. Dojima paused for a second before taking a step closer to Maruki.

“Yeah, that’s his surname. Why do you know that?” Dojima was back on the defensive. Maruki smiled awkwardly, holding his hands together.

“He’s a frequent visitor of Adachi’s… I’m pretty sure it’s monthly.” I’d rather not be sent to jail! I don’t even know what crime I could have committed… Dojima’s shoulders relaxed as he sighed, shaking his head. There was a new expression that Maruki hadn’t seen yet - disappointment. 

“Seriously?.. After everything that happened… He’s got a problem like that. I guess it makes sense… He’s just always been that way. Like you, he probably wants to see Adachi get better too.” Dojima folded his arms. Maruki smiled a little, relaxing as Dojima spoke. You just care a lot. 

“At this point I’ve noticed that whatever Yu was doing, it was keeping Adachi in a corner. Dangerous, dangerous situation… But I had and have no proof. And Adachi confessed - who would do that when a case could have been left cold like that? Honestly, Yu stressed me out. Always found him near the scene of the crime… Come to think of it…” Dojima looked like he was going to say something but the pain from his face cleared. He sighed, shaking his head.

“No, never mind. I’m holding you back too much, that shop’s gonna shut soon. You’re too good at making me talk.” Dojima smiled a little, shaking his head. That’s different. Maybe he’s just being polite? Maruki shook his head as well.

“No, no, I have to thank you for being so willing to talk with me. I know I’m just a stranger intruding in this situation… But I do genuinely want to help Adachi. I can’t get this information by myself…” Maruki frowned as he thought about it. 

“You’re stronger than me. I would have smacked him by now.” Dojima laughed a little. Maruki smiled and shook his head again. 

“No, no… You’re the strong one, Dojima. Trust me when I say that. Well, I’ll let you go now. I’m sure that I’ve made you late for dinner.” Maruki waved his hand in front of his face, wanting to turn the compliment onto Dojima. Dojima hummed quietly for a second. 

“Yeah, but that’s not your fault. I shouldn’t have been running late in the first place. Do you know how to get back to the train station by yourself? It’s going to be a long walk from here.” Dojima took the keys out of his pocket, as if offering to drive Maruki back quickly. Oh no. I’m hungry, but I don’t want to keep Dojima for longer than this… He looked between the store and Dojima’s hand, wincing as he made his decision.

“I’ll grab something on the way back home. Thank you so much for taking me back!” Maruki smiled, though there was a kind of pain that came up. The local food… Well, that was a Chinese style diner. But the food… It’s okay. I don’t want to be rude like that. Just as that thought crossed his mind, the light from the store flicked off. Dojima shrugged, starting their walk again. He hasn’t even checked his watch, he just knows what the time is. He hasn’t even taken his phone out once either… Does that also count as a detective’s intuition, or is it something that comes to you when you decide to live in the country?

Maruki got into the car, sitting in the back to be polite. At least, I think that’s how I can be polite in this situation. Dojima paused for a second when he noticed this, but sat in the front anyway. Oh no, was that the wrong choice? Does it look like I don’t want to be near him? Maurki tried to conceal his worry. 

“So, three hours until you’re back home, right? That’s a lot of effort to go through for one client.” Dojima struck the conversation back up. Marukl couldn’t hide his surprise when he heard it. 

“Oh, do you think so? It’s no big deal for me… In comparison to the things Adachi is going through. And what he did to other people.” Maruki’s frown came in quickly. He looked at the back of the seat in front of him and thought about it quickly. Is it really a lot of effort to go through for someone else?

“If someone like that can change and become a better person, I want it to happen. It’s not to be able to forgive him, but it’s to make sure that it doesn’t happen again. If the same problem exists, when he gets out he’s just likely to reoffend, isn’t he? I don’t necessarily trust the prison system to… Oh.” Maruki looked up awkwardly to Dojima as he realised who he was talking to. Dojima kept his eyes on the road, but he understood Maruki’s sentiment. 

“No, I get that. That’s just the system, unfortunately. I guess that’s why they hire people like you. You’ve got a good heart, you know that? You don’t even realise that you’re running circles for someone like him. I hope that he recognises how lucky he is that he didn’t get a shitty therapist.” It was a positive statement, but something crawled through Dojima’s words that made it just a little bit sharper. Like he’s scolding Adachi, all the way from where he is.

“Thank you for thinking that way. It makes me a bit relieved, actually. It feels like I haven’t made any progress lately…” Maruki laughed a little, weakly as he admitted that.

“It can happen that way. Take it from someone who knows - it’ll come crashing through pretty quick if you keep the pressure on it. You’re doing a good job.” It almost sounded like the words that Dojima wanted to hear for himself. Maruki nodded slowly, noticing the pain in those words. He works so hard. I appreciate your work, Dojima. But the words didn’t come out. They were stuck in his mouth, it felt like he shouldn’t say them at all. His teeth shook as he tried to force it out. I’m just a stranger. I know nothing about his work, these words are hollow.  

The car came to a stop, but Dojima kept it running. Here it is, the train station again. It looks different in the dark like this. Maruki smiled as he got out of the car and shut the door. Dojima leaned out of the window again to talk to him.

“Alright, if you need anything else just call me. You’re fine to keep that number.” Dojima nodded. Maruki lit up, appreciating the new found trust Dojima had for him.

“Thank you! And if you’d like any couns-” Maruki quickly corrected himself.

“Any therapy , let me know. I’ll come out here for you.” Maruki’s smile had a tinge of awkwardness in it as Dojima laughed at the idea. 

“I’ll let you know when I’m stuck rocking in a corner. Goodbye, Maruki.” Dojima pulled himself out of the window, but Maruki finally came to blurt the words he wanted to say.

“You’re doing a good job, Dojima! Thank you for your hard work!” Maruki’s hands balled up tightly. The embarrassment grew as he wondered if that was even the right thing to say, but it was hard to see the heat in his face in the night like this. Dojima was taken aback for a few seconds before he struggled to look Maruki in the eye. 

“Yeah… Thank you for that. Bye, then.” Dojima took the car and left. Maruki watched it leave before he let his body deal with his emotions. That was so weird, I’m sorry Dojima! It just felt like you really needed to hear it! You aren’t my client, why am I treating you that way?! He suddenly wanted to rip his hair out from the embarrassment. His glasses almost fell off of his face as he leaned over, wanting to keel over and die with the feeling he just inflicted on himself. This is awful. I want to get on the train and forget what I just did. He looked at the train time schedule on the board nearby and sighed. Thirteen minutes. I’ll be stuck with my own thoughts for thirteen minutes. Help me.

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 4th 20XX

In our most recent session, I tried my ability again with Adachi. I found that it didn’t work again and asked him clarifying questions in the best way that I could manage. He told me about the town that he lived in before his time here in prison.

I’ve recently gone through Adachi’s court case, which focused on his murders in a country town called Inaba. 

They never described what specific mental illness he was applying for leniency under. 

I’d like more information before I see Adachi again, but I keep thinking back and forth about what the right thing to do is… 

What if my ability doesn’t work on another person? What if it just keeps happening and the information I needed was something I could only get from Adachi’s visitors? What if they become so busy later on that I can never get a word in with them? As much as it is an invasion of Adachi’s privacy… I’m beginning to think that this is a necessary step forward.

It is now the 10th. I visited Ryotaro Dojima, who was Adachi’s boss before he got sent to prison. I came to Inaba and spoke with him in person - He was genuinely really nice about the situation. 

He said that Adachi had a hard time making friends when he got transferred like he did. He said that the only way he actually did make friends was through a force of proximity, but that his situation with Dojima's nephew, Yu Narukami, was different. 

He spoke about Adachi’s confession sounding like ‘nonsense’, but nonsense that aligned with the confession that Namatame, another person involved in the case (albeit differently I should add) gave. 

TV world??? I’m not sure if I should ask Adachi about that

Unfortunately, even with this helpful information I don’t see any solution to what’s happening with my ability. should i just try again? third time’s the charm or something like that?

Chapter Text

Maruki sat at the desk of his office today, rubbing his face with his hands as he thought about the new information he gathered about Adachi. I keep thinking about the horrible things he did. I probably didn’t even hear about them in as much detail as Dojima witnessed it as… He frowned, conflicted in his own feelings. I want to help him. Even so, I don’t know how I can really ignore the facts of the case now. His glasses came to rest on the back of his hands as he covered his eyes, shutting them and sitting in that darkness for a bit. And yet, I’ve enjoyed our time together. Even if he has been difficult at times, it’s not like I’ve walked out regretting it for… More than an hour. It feels nice when he opens up to me. I think it feels nice when anyone trusts me. He was completely distracted when he heard the knock on his door. 

Maruki stayed seated as per usual but quickly removed his hands from his face and set his glasses back in place. Adachi came through the door like normal, a friendly smile and wave. Maruki smiled back, warily for a second before he corrected that energy into a proper smile. 

“Hey Doc! You seem tired today. Bad night’s sleep or something?” Adachi sat down, clasping his hands into his lap. Maruki laughed a little, shaking his head.

“Oh, no, actually. It was lights out when I hit the pillow. I think I just missed breakfast today, sleeping in like that.” Maruki folded his hands onto his lap. Adachi hummed quietly, looking Maruki up and down before he spoke again.

“Huh. That’s funny, I could have sworn you were busy with something. Didn’t you say anything last session? What was it again…” Adachi’s smile grew a little wider as he watched Maruki’s confusion. Did I? Maybe I mentioned the school trip? But no, I remember being super shocked and only finding out I wasn’t needed on Monday. I had no way of contacting Adachi.  

“What do you mean?” I’m at a loss for what it could be that I possibly said. All of what I did was planned AFTER the session with Adachi last week. Maruki frowned, brows furrowed as he tried to understand what Adachi meant. Adachi laughed a little, shaking his head.

“Oh, no, that’s right. You didn’t say anything at all. Actually, a little something dropped from your folder ages ago. I must have just heard your voice when I read it.” Adachi reached into his shirt - being that he had no pockets. Maruki could only watch in horror as his client pulled out a folded piece of paper and held it up. There’s no way. What is that? Maruki went to grab his folder but Adachi held out his other hand over the top of the folder.

“Nuh-uh-uh, Doctor . We’re playing by my rules right now. Put that hand there back down.” There was such a cruel glee in Adachi’s face. Maruki slowly brought his hand back and held it together with the other as he kept his mouth shut. Depending on what he got, this could be absolutely terrible for me. It was hard to breathe calmly. This whole thing could be over if Adachi wants it to be.

“Good job! Now, I have some questions that I want answered. You will tell me the truth, or I will tell Warden Maeda outside right now about what I have in my hand. If you understand, nod.” He has complete control right now. I still can’t imagine what he read - what do I keep in my folder again? Maruki nodded, looking down into his lap with a squint as he tried to think. His heart froze - or more like the pressure he was under muted all of his senses and he couldn’t feel it trying to make a break for it.

“There’s a good boy. Now, if you don’t mind…” Adachi kicked one leg over the other as he grinned. “What do you need CCTV footage for, huh?” Maruki’s brows furrowed. CCTV footage? When did I… He looked back over to the folder.

“Hey, I wouldn’t think about that if I were you. If you go for it, I’ll knock on that door right now. I have the right to leave whenever I want to, don’t I?” Maruki looked away, sighing. I wasn’t even planning on touching it. He really has me in a corner here. I don’t remember… Was it in an email I sent to the staff? Why would I need… It clicked, even though he couldn’t remember where it was put. It’s part of the embellishments I wrote when I was explaining the experiment! Wrote where? What did I put it in? He racked his brain. 

“You’re pretty quiet for someone with a lie to protect, Doc! You only have… What’s the time now? Twenty-five minutes left.” Adachi beamed, waving the letter side to side as if he was counting the seconds ticking by. 

“I think I remember. It’s part of the data collected for the experiment my university is conducting here. It’s so that we’re able to quote with accuracy.” It was a lie, but part of what he’d already built. Adachi hummed in a more teasing way.

“And it’s not because you want to keep the videos for yourself? Okay, I guess I can believe you. After all, you’re a licensed counsellor. Don’t we need trust to keep our sessions going?” I don’t think I’d be able to mark on a graph how much fun you’re having with this. Has prison really left you with so little to do? Maruki grew irritated when he was done processing how much this would really impact his ability to study his skills and test his power. This gets in the way of helping everyone else here.

“Yikes, I’d be scared of you if you weren’t such a mouse!” Adachi laughed, running a hand through his hair as he looked up to the roof. Maruki looked down again to his lap, realising that he was glaring. Now’s not the time for that. I need to calm down - Adachi probably doesn’t have the power to convince someone like Warden Maeda… Right?  

“Is it true then that every interaction gets reported to the wardens? Doesn’t that mean that you’re breaking patient confidentiality like this?” Adachi looked down at Maruki. By now he’d leaned back into his chair to watch the show. Is it? Not really. It was a small lie to tide them over… After all, I can’t use my abilities without being in that person’s presence - and even then, that wouldn’t have convinced everyone to be on board.

“No. In fact, I haven’t really spoken to them much outside of what is necessary to run the experiment. I think the only way I’d tell them about an interaction is if someone got violent with me and it actually needed to be reported, or if I seriously thought you were in danger of hurting yourself or someone else.” Maruki shook his head, taking his fingers to pinch the bridge of his glasses. He took them off and set them on the table to stare at Adachi directly. 

“Huh, that’s weird. Why is it written here then? Don’t tell me that my own counsellor is a compulsive liar! That kind of throws the whole trust thing out the window, doesn’t it?” Adachi started to kick his leg gently. He has me there. Maruki frowned.

“It does. I’m sorry for lying.” He watched Adachi look him up and down again. What is he thinking about right now? It’s become harder to read him.

“I’ll give you an A for that apology. Direct and straight to the point, even if I would have liked some extra embellishments like ‘ it’ll never happen again!’ Or ‘ what can I do to make this right?’ ” Adachi laughed again, shaking his head.

“Now that makes me curious. What reason do you have to lie to prison staff to get access to a group of prisoners, Doc? To be more specific, you take hours out of our weeks to show up here, to accomplish what?” Adachi kept Maruki’s gaze. Maruki kept his head low as the shock of the situation died down in his chest, replaced by a growing anxiety. I could be thrown into jail for this. This is probably a fraud crime of some kind.

“Volunteer work.” Maruki blurted out before he could form a thought to stop and recompose himself.

“Is that so?” Adachi unhooked his leg from the other and stood up. Maruki’s anxiety spiked as he leaned forward in an attempt to get up.

“Don’t stand up. You won’t make it in time. Answer me properly, Doctor. ” Adachi’s smile faded, leaving a dull expression as he stood. Why did it have to be today? Why did it happen at all? Maruki brought a hand to his chest as he tried to relax.

“There’s research that I have to complete. I can’t tell the details to anyone, but… It’s something that my university stopped funding. I’ll stress that I cannot tell you the details. I will risk being caught here if it means that I protect it for the time being.” Maruki winced, trying to control his breathing. Adachi wandered around to Maruki’s side of the desk as he spoke.

“Now that is honesty and bravery. A mixture I don’t normally see in you, Doc.” Adachi laughed as he leaned down to meet Maruki at eye level. Adachi leaned onto the table as he spoke.

“So, then. You’re a rogue researcher. What do you hope to achieve when you finish that little piece?” It was close enough that Maruki could feel the edge of Adachi’s breath brush his hand. Maruki looked away, finding the wind in his chest and stabilising it enough to calm himself down from the panic he felt. 

“That’s rude, shouldn’t you look me in the eyes when I talk to you?” Adachi grabbed Maruki’s face and turned it toward him. His fingers dug into his cheeks, firm but they didn’t scratch him. Huh? Maruki’s brain went blank for a few seconds as it rebooted. He shut his eyes tightly when he gave up the resistance. He didn’t even realise that it went against Adachi’s demands.

“I- Wan-ded ‘oo proo-be ih… ” Maruki shook his head slightly, a silent ask to be let go. Adachi sighed, accepting that he wouldn’t understand a thing if he just kept holding onto his face. Maruki sighed briefly before he spoke.

“I wanted to prove that my research was worth it. That it was necessary, that I had the proof to back it up.” Maruki took the time to rub his cheek, opening his eyes. He found that Adachi was in the middle of sitting down back on his side of the desk, a dull expression on his face.

“ Right . Well, I guess I wouldn’t understand a freak like you after all.” Adachi folded his arms over his lap. I really thought that I was going to have to call for help. Maruki held his hands together, squeezing them in an attempt to soothe himself. I don’t think he can help his behaviour right now. While taking my work was an active attempt to undermine me, I need to remind myself that this is just entertainment to him. If he had any healthy means of getting this energy out, I probably wouldn’t be involved as much as I am. I need to calm down. Maruki took a slow breath in, slowing down his heartbeat. If he actually wanted something from me, it would be easier to use at least a threat violence to achieve that. There are consequences to doing so, but if I put myself in his place and genuinely wanted the information he was getting… I’d do that. Especially with a past like his. 

“Well… Thank you for listening.” I think if I go with this path of the conversation, it just removes what made it fun for Adachi. Maruki’s mind cleared up. Adachi sighed, leaning back in his chair as he looked up at the clock again. 

“I really don’t want to be a piece for someone else to use, you know?” Adachi completely ignored Maruki’s words. I have it worked out for the time being, then. Maruki smiled a little, folding his hands into his lap again. 

“Pardon me?” Maruki couldn’t exactly work out what that meant. Adachi shook his head.

“The work you’re doing puts me at a position lower than you. I’d call that unfair, wouldn’t you? You’re the researcher, I’m a prisoner.” Adachi kept his focus on the clock. He really is avoiding looking at me. I wonder why now of all times? It’s probably because I thanked him. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to flip it onto you - but it is just a little bit funny after a moment like that.

“Unfair? None of this research would be possible without your collaboration - and your silence, if I might add?” Maruki smiled awkwardly. I feel so meek compared to the demands Adachi was able to make before. ‘Pretty please’ is all I can ask. Adachi kicked one leg over the other, but his smile remained to be seen. 

“I have no choice. I’d lose my weekly jester if I did that!” Adachi laughed a little, looking back over to Maruki with a demeaning smile. I’m sure you would. Maruki kept his mouth shut in regards to that thought. 

“Well, if you’re done with your questions, may I have that piece of paper back? What is it, anyway?” Maruki held his hand out for it. By now it was left on the corner of the desk where Adachi grabbed it and handed it over. Maruki opened it up and it was like a string split on the inside. It’s just the letter I sent at the beginning! None of the emails that I sent - I don’t even print out my emails, I should have realised this sooner! Of course, here it is, ‘CCTV footage’ - that was something I added to make it sound more realistic. Adachi laughed, seeing Maruki’s calm expression crumple into a shrivelled despair that required the table for stability. Maruki set his arms flat, along with the paper on the desk and stared at Adachi for a few moments with shock. How did you do that with so little information… You are one scary person, Adachi.  

“So. If we’re going to keep this whole counselling thing going, I have a demand. I will, without a second thought, request a cancellation if you don’t meet it.” Adachi looked serious. Maruki frowned as he waited for Adachi to continue. 

“I want you to show me your research when you’re done.” Adachi smiled as he watched Maruki’s confusion rise up again. Why? He doesn’t even know what it’s about. Maruki went to speak, but Adachi added to that thought.

“You’re going behind an entire prison’s back just to get this evidence. You’ve lied your way through to get here. I want to know what you’re going to do with that information. You don’t have to tell me now because I’ll find out when you show me that research report, won’t I?” Adachi held his hand out flat for a moment, emphasising the won’t I part of his words. Maruki sighed slowly.

“That’s a condition I can work with. Thank you for your cooperation, Adachi.” The weight of ‘thank you’ was different here. Adachi smiled in a friendly manner and stood up. 

“Great! Well, time’s up now. I’ll see you next week, Doc!” Adachi laughed a little as he looked over Maruki one more time.

“Goodbye, Adachi.” Maruki picked up his glasses as Adachi knocked on the door. It took only a few seconds for the door to open, leading into the routine he had of thanking and saying goodbye to Warden Maeda as well. Once the door shut he looked at the piece of paper on his desk. The energy keeping him afloat left his body as he processed everything that just happened to him. He was capable of doing that with just one letter. Are all detectives just like that? Was that something he learnt as a part of being a detective, or as a part of his own life? Maruki ran a hand through his hair before he set his glasses back in place. I relied on the shape of these words just then… But I can really see it now. I’ve really dug myself a nice pit, haven’t I?

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 11th 20XX

Adachi had me in a corner today. I couldn’t try my ability again, I completely forgot.

The only progress I made in that session was some better understanding of how Adachi works… 

In exchange for his continual cooperation, he asked to see the research paper after I was done with it. I keep trying to make sense of that, but the only thing I keep coming back to is what he told me his reason was - and I don’t know if that was a half truth or a lie. He said something like ‘I want to know what you’re doing with this information’ and ‘You lied your way through to get here’. 

Does he even know anything about cognitive psience? I didn’t really tell him what the paper was on either. 

Wait a minute

is he just bored again? are prisoners allowed books? does he just want a book to read???

Chapter Text

Maruki sat on the edge of his mattress, staring at his laptop screen as he finished writing. I just keep thinking about what Dojima said. It felt like he kept something to himself there… And he spoke about a TV world? ‘Whatever Yu was doing, it was keeping Adachi in a corner’... Maruki squinted at the time. It’s only eight at night… Would it be rude to call at this hour? He paused for a second. How old is Yu again? If he can visit Adachi on his own, he must be an adult by now…  

He frowned, beginning to feel that guilt build up in his chest again. But I need this information. Especially if Adachi is going to try and do things the way that he is, I should hear from the people that he was close to. They can always just reject my offer to meet up… He bit his guilt with the clench of his jaw as he pulled up the PDF of the visitor’s log again. He pressed call and waited as it rang out. Or they can just ignore my call. They have a choice here, I’m not forcing them to do anything. Maruki reminded himself in an attempt to calm down. 

“Hello?” The phone finally picked up. Maruki sat up straight. I didn’t even think about my availability or what I was going to say! He shook his head quickly, like he was trying to shake the feeling out. 

“Hi there! Is this Yu Narukami?” Maruki shut his laptop gently, trying not to make much sound as he stood up and needed to wander. 

“Yes, it is. Who is this?” Well, at least he seems curious compared to Dojima. 

“Oh, I’m Tohru Adachi’s therapist. I was wondering if you could help me understand his background history better. I think it would be best to meet up?” Maruki smiled awkwardly, hoping that Yu would agree to it. He tried to keep his recurring guilt at bay. 

“I mean… Doesn’t this break patient confidentiality?” Yu’s question echoed in Maruki’s head. What? Does it? Maruki went quiet. Oh no… Does it really? He laughed a little, politely but awkwardly.

“Oh, no, don’t worry. I sought permission from Adachi first.” Maruki was about to have an existential crisis. The only thing keeping it at bay was the thought that it would immensely help him understand Adachi’s situation better if he got that information from Yu. There was a moment of silence before Yu responded.

“Right… I’m sorry, what was your name?” I didn’t even introduce myself… Maruki ran a hand through his hair as he figured out the next few steps in advance. I need to figure out a place to meet up, and what day, and what time. I also need to figure out what questions I’m going to ask. I’ll be more prepared this time.

“I’m Takuto Maruki! I’m so sorry, I’ve been flustered lately with work.” Maruki hoped that excuse would help his case. 

“That’s okay. Wait, Takuto Maruki?…” Yu went quiet for a few seconds. What’s wrong? Maruki’s confusion grew with the longer the silence went. He breathed in to talk, but Yu finally said something.

“I think my uncle mentioned you.” Oh no. Maruki laughed awkwardly, coming to sit on the kitchen tiles where it was cooler to the touch. He curled up a bit as he stayed there.

“Oh, really? I did see him earlier this week…” I hope it was nothing bad. If Yu already knows, does he trust me more or less now? Maruki frowned, not wanting to think on that any more than he already had.

“Yeah, he found out I was visiting Adachi more than him and I got a talking to. He was like, ‘ don’t you know that you don’t have to be involved with him anymore?’ It wasn’t so bad, he wasn’t yelling at me so don’t worry about it. Hey, are you around Tokyo? I think I have a cafe in mind that we could meet up at.” Yu offered. Oh, really? Maruki was taken aback by his willingness, but kept it to himself. I feel bad for it regardless. He brushed it off like it was nothing but I still spoke out of turn.

“I’m really sorry about that… Oh, wherever you’re comfortable! I live pretty close to Shibuya but I can really go anywhere.” Maruki heard the text tone of his phone so he pulled it away from his face to click into the text he was sent. It was Yu’s number and a location link for a map app to read. Whoa, thank you.  

“Then is this place okay?” Maruki took a closer look. Oh, it’s in French. Miel et Crêpes? Maruki clicked into the link, and it opened in his app. He put it to routing mode to see where it was in comparison to where he was right now. That’s in Kichijoji. 

“That’s perfect. Do you think you’d be available tomorrow, maybe?” Maruki came to relax. He’s taking this pretty well, actually. Could it be that Adachi already told him about me somewhat? I don’t know what he’d have to say about it, though. He shook his head slightly.

“Yeah, I think I can do it tomorrow. How about lunch time? That time makes the most sense.” Yu’s voice didn’t change so much over the phone, so it was kind of hard to understand how he really felt about the situation. Actually, I wonder if he feels forced at all? I do have his number and he only questioned it once. 

“Okay, sure! Again, thank you so much for taking a call so late at night. I’ll see you tomorrow!” Maruki smiled, getting back up and getting off of the tiles. He picked his laptop up gently as he sat down, setting it aside when he knew that he hadn’t crushed it.

“That’s okay. See you then.” He’s a man of few words when he can help it. The call ended and he set his phone aside, going through everything that he’d need to do tonight before he had to go to bed.

The morning came quicker than he would have liked, his arms and legs just going through the motions that he’d done for years at this point as a means of a morning routine. The only thing that really sat consciously in his mind was the fact he had to go out today, but since Sunday had become his only day off in the week he had trouble bringing an ounce of focus before his coffee kicked in. It doesn’t help that it’s hot today… The cafe should be nice. I’m going to think about the cafe. He checked the time and his heart dropped through his chest. I’ve got ten minutes to get there! Where did the time go? Maruki grabbed his keys and wallet before he ran out the door, almost tripping over himself as he tried to get his shoes on properly. 

The train was uneventful, or maybe he just couldn’t pay attention to it over the fear of being late to a hangout with someone that he had no clue about, that he initiated. When he was able to get off of the train he almost ran to the cafe in an attempt to save time. He grew quickly tired of that however and walked the rest of the way. He was a mental health specialist, not a health specialist. 

When he got there, he realised one thing - he had no idea what Yu looked like. Dojima was easy to find last time because Dojima could recognise Maruki straight away as a visitor to the town, but as he looked over the sea of faces at the cafe he couldn’t see a ‘Narukami’ anywhere. He stood awkwardly for a few seconds before a waitstaff approached him. 

“Oh, just a table for two please, for Maruki. I don’t think my friend is here yet.” Maruki smiled awkwardly, turning his head away from the people he accidentally stared at. 

“We only have outside tables available, is that okay? It’s pretty hot today, so I understand!” The staff member smiled apologetically. I really need to do this today… It shouldn’t be too bad. There’ll be the wind, I hope…

“That’s okay! Thank you, really.” Maruki waved a hand in front of his face as he shuffled over to the door to the tables outside. He let the waitstaff be and chose a table outside as covered by shade as he could manage it. He took the seat that would hit the sun the most and waited. I’m only a little bit late, by a couple of minutes. The thought barely occurred before he heard the rumbling of a motorbike somewhere close to the road, so he turned his head to look. 

Two people pulled up close to the path. A young man with bright brown hair got off of the bike, offering his hand to his passenger who happened to be another young man with silver hair. His passenger took his hand and hopped off of the back of what was now apparent to be a large black scooter, letting the brunette pop the seat off to grab something inside. The seats can come off? There’s storage? Should I get a scooter?.. I’m probably too old for it. Maruki folded his hands over the table as he looked at the time on his phone. I wonder if he’ll be here soon. Maybe I should send him a text soon.  

He looked back up as the scooter rumbled away. Maruki accidentally made eye contact with the silver haired man, who was now much closer to the cafe walls than he expected. He smiled awkwardly and looked back down at his phone. Oops, sorry. I didn’t mean to stare, I should really pull up the news or something. Maruki pulled up the news app on his phone and went scrolling, finding a bunch of weather reports before he came across anything else. Nothing really caught his eye, though it was probably because he was pretending that he had something to do rather than actually reading it. He heard the door open and lit up, turning to face it out of curiosity - but saw the silver haired man again. 

“Oh, hey. Are you Maruki? The waitstaff pointed me here.” Oh no, that was Yu the whole time. I thought he’d look something like Dojima, but now I realise that uncles and nephews don’t have to look alike at all. Maruki smiled, concealing the embarrassment he had inside. I am so sorry, I didn’t notice or add any of the details at all.  

“Yep, that’s me! Come sit, I tried to get a spot in the shade.” Maruki put his phone away, wanting to show respect to Yu after that moment. Yu smiled a little and sat across from him, setting his phone facing down on the table. 

“Thanks. Have you ordered anything yet?” Yu put his hands on his knees, not sparing much of a look at the menu. He comes here often, I guess? Maruki shook his head, taking a look down now that he felt like he had the chance to. I feel like I should have worked out what I wanted earlier. I didn’t even think about it when I sat down.

“Not yet. I noticed all of the reviews were talking about the cake though, maybe I’ll have to try that? What were you thinking about?” Maruki went through the menu to find it. Here we go. They have a few different flavours, but I might try that black forest slice. That sounds really nice.  

“I’ll get a crepe with honey.” Will he actually? Maruki tried not to look too obviously behind Yu to the windows covered with the cafe’s name on it. . Yu kept a straight face for a while before he smiled at Maruki’s reaction and shook his head.

“Sorry, I was kidding. I’ll get a breakfast style crepe, it’s what I usually get here.” Yu moved his hands into his lap to give them a rest. Maruki nodded with a smile. When another wait staff appeared they politely ordered and from there it was pretty quiet. Maruki thought about it for a little while before he said anything.

“Was that your friend on the scooter?” I hope this makes some conversation. I don’t want to be seen as creepy. Maruki tilted his head to the side slightly. Yu seemed confused for a few seconds before he caught on.

“No, that was my boyfriend.” Yu looked toward his phone, his face pretty flat after saying that. Maruki smiled again, holding his hands together.

“Oh, wow! Well, I should have guessed.” Maruki laughed a little, immediately taking the chance to make Yu feel welcome. Yu smiled a little and shook his head.

“No, that’s okay. I guess it’s politer that way.” Yu nodded, looking back up at Maruki. 

“Yeah, I think if I said, was that your boyfriend , that could have been taken as insulting if you two were just friends. I think it would be the same way even in another scenario.” Maruki nodded, setting his hands back down. Wow, I’m happy for him. His boyfriend seems very nice to him too, dropping him off so close to the cafe like that.

“Right, I agree with that.” Yu folded his arms, looking back down to the table. It was quiet for another bit. 

“I guess I should get into it, huh? Are you sure that you’re okay talking about Adachi? I understand that you were very close to him when things went down, and you can just leave whenever you want to.” Maruki’s smile became awkward as he couldn’t find a very good way to transition between the shallow talk to the topic he wanted to talk about.

“Yeah, it’s been years at this point. I’ll be okay - but I have some questions first.” Yu nodded to himself slightly as he looked back up at Maruki with a bit more focus in his eyes. I guess asking questions in return for questions answered is how it runs in your family - that joke aside, I understand completely.

“Ask away. I don’t have anything to hide from you.” Maruki brought his hands down into his lap and held them together. Yu frowned a little at those words.

“You say that, but did Adachi really consent to this? He’s not really the kind of person to let someone else define him. What can I really answer that he can’t?” That’s a good question. Maruki’s brain went blank. That’s a very good question. I didn’t prepare for that, I thought there had been enough convincing from how you sounded on the phone…

“He really did. If I could call him, I would. He finds it hard to answer questions about his previous relationships in Inaba… It kind of went something like ‘ how about you call him instead of asking me?’ ” Maruki tried his best impression, which made Yu smile a little bit. 

“You suck at that.” It was a short and blunt response. Maruki laughed a little, shaking his head.

“I’d like to see you try. I feel like he gets fed up with me too quickly for me to really get a nail down on his neutral voice.” Maruki teased. Yu hummed quietly for a few seconds as if he was debating it. 

“ Doc, I’m getting REAL tired of your shit. ” Yu mimicked him from memory. Maruki froze for a second before he leaned onto the table.

“How did you do that? I mean, okay, you visit him a lot and you’ve been around him for years at this point… But that was terrifyingly accurate. Maybe just a little too much on the ‘real’ part.” Maruki laughed, still recovering from his shock as Yu laughed with him. 

“It’s pretty easy when you think about it. If you just pool all the hatred for the world in your voice it should come naturally.” Yu joked with him, seeing the waitstaff come with their food. He picked his phone up so that it would be out of the way so that the plates and glasses could be put down. Maruki sat up and away from the table as well and they both thanked the waitstaff. 

“‘ All the hatred for the world’. Yeah, I think that does suit his mindset pretty well. He doesn’t like human connection, he doesn’t like being thanked - I’m finding it hard to think of things he actually likes.” Maruki smiled, shaking his head. Yu paused for a moment, but it was clear that whatever thought he had did not make it through the filter of his mouth. 

“Yeah, he’s a pretty complicated guy. I can see how you could have trouble with him… You don’t really seem like someone he would choose to talk to outside of counselling.” Yu was being honest. I appreciate your honesty but somehow it hurts more.  

“Really? I guess so. How did you become friends with him, actually? It’s a major age gap, isn’t it? Do we sound like old men to you yet?” Maruki laughed a little, curious. Yu shook his head.

“Nah, you sound like a young professor though. As for how we became friends… I was always the one to approach him, honestly. He was someone my uncle was close to, I was curious about that. My uncle… Does more for me than my parents do.” Yu sighed, but he continued on.

“He just spent a lot of our time together complaining, but it became obvious that he was talking about things that he lacked. It feels like he saw a gap between what he wanted and what he got. I think back on it now and I see that he was pretty disillusioned with his job. I mean - considering everything… If you know.” Yu realised that there might be a difference in their understanding of the Inaba crimes. Maruki nodded, not wanting to stop Yu with an interjection. 

“Right, so… When I started noticing it, that’s when I started being around him more often. It didn’t sound like he had a lot of people to go to. Then it turned out that he was just doing the worst kind of things behind my back. That was a lot to deal with. Even so… He really was just a normal person who continually received no support. He told me that he didn’t have friends in school, and his parents weren’t really there for him much if it wasn’t about his grades. Anyone could have ended up like Adachi… He just lost it before someone like Dojima was there to help him.” Yu’s expression grew darker with the pain in his face. The fact you had to think about things like this as a kid is terrible. 

“I see. Do you mind if I ask something a little weird? Just quickly.” Maruki held his hands together, squeezing them in his lap. But I want to know if Yu noticed anything about Adachi talking about that ‘TV world’ thing. Dojima made it sound like it was a sudden change.

“Sure, like what?” Yu’s face cleared as he looked back up at Maruki.

“Did he ever mention something about a TV world?.. Sorry, I know it’s a weird question. It’s something Dojima mentioned as part of his confession.” Maruki didn’t expect to see the surprise in Yu’s face. He recognises it, at least. 

“Can I first ask you how much you know about that confession?” Yu looked pretty serious. Maruki looked down at the table while he collected his thoughts.

“As far as I understand it by Dojima’s explanation, someone called Namatame was deceived by Adachi into ‘throwing people into the TV world’. Adachi then confessed that he had also used the TV world himself. He’s never mentioned it with me, granted that he’s never had a prompt or need to.” Maruki nodded, letting his hands relax a bit from the squeezing. 

“Okay. You haven’t said whether or not you believe in that confession, though.” Yu was direct about what he wanted answered. It wasn’t like he was being rude, it was more of a nudge back onto the right track. 

“Well… It’s hard to say, isn’t it? What is a TV world? If I could have read Adachi’s confession I think I could have a clearer answer for you… But I do have something that I noticed. The only reason that his prison sentence is as short as it is, is because his lawyer appealed for leniency. When he stated that Adachi was mentally unwell, they didn’t mention anything - not a doctor’s note, no strict details. The judge accepted it, but Dojima said something along the lines of ‘his confession made it clear’. It bothers me a lot - to me it doesn’t make much sense. Oh - not that I want him to…” Get the life sentence or the death penalty. I don’t think that would fix the issue. Maruki frowned as he thought about that. It will get rid of the person but not what caused the problem in the first place.

“A lot of people would have just said that they don’t believe it.” Yu seemed somewhat surprised. Maruki paused for a second. Is this not normal? I guess my research kind of delves into this territory, but… There are very few ties to this ‘TV World’ right now. A world for the heart - is it similar at all?

“I think it’s reasonable to consider. It’s not really every day that two people share a collective hallucination - even Dojima said that their confessions lined up. It’s possible that Adachi heard what Namatame was saying and adjusted it, but… My research tells me that something else might be at play.” Maruki introduced that idea as gently as he could, knowing that it was sudden to bring into the conversation. Yu seemed to catch on quite quickly, though.

“You’re a researcher, huh? What about it relates to the TV world?” It felt like both of them were moving pieces without being able to see them. It was like a game to see who would say what first. Maruki decided to give up being indirect now that he was comfortable with the thought that Yu might know bits and pieces about it too. He quietened his voice, knowing that no one was sitting around them for the time being but he was acutely aware of the foot traffic nearby. 

“Well, my area of study is cognitive psience. If you don’t know, it’s basically about the conditions of the heart - or one’s innermost thoughts and feelings - that can cause cognitive worlds to exist. It’s pretty untouched in the field of science but it became a particular interest to me when I saw that it might be able to help people. When Dojima started talking about Adachi’s confession I didn’t really connect the dots at the time, but it became apparent that it might have something to do with cognitive psience… Especially with how you’ve approached the manner. For two people to experience a similar world like that… It isn’t out of the norm with the lens of study that cognitive psience gives us.” Maruki kept a watch of Yu. He’s not really old enough to be at the level to steal my research - I don’t even know if he’s in a science faculty or not. As much as they say ‘don’t say your ideas out loud in public’, I think this is perfectly fine.

“So you do know. Have you ever been inside a world like that, Maruki?” Yu’s expression stayed flat, but something in his eyes softened as he spoke. Maruki shook his head gently. 

“I haven’t. I know that they exist, it’s just difficult to figure out how to access them myself.” Maruki was honest. Yu nodded, staying quiet for a couple of seconds before he said anything.

“Right, well… If it does relate, I guess the TV world could be described as a collective consciousness. There were specific sections cut away for whoever got stuck inside but it’s a lot to just drop in one afternoon…” Yu became awkward as he realised just how much he would have to talk for Maruki to be able to understand it. Maruki shook his head.

“That’s okay. You don’t have to make sense to me, you can just say what’s on your mind and leave it be. And, again, if you’re uncomfortable, you don’t have to talk about it. I think even those words and your confirmation of my idea really helps me understand what you and Adachi have witnessed. It may only be the tip of the iceberg but it does confirm some things that I’ve realised about his case.” More like, I finally understand what the outlying factor between my ability working on others and it not working on Adachi is. Whatever contact he made with the cognitive world he experienced is interrupting my ability. Maruki felt light with relief. It was a problem he could finally put away. It’s possible that I might not be the only person with an ability that can affect someone outside of the cognitive world. This is giving me so many ideas, but I can’t write them down… That would be rude. Yu nodded along. 

“Alright. If that helps, that’s cool.” He went quiet again for a moment before he noticed something on Maruki’s side of the table.

“Is that apple juice?” Yu’s brows furrowed. Maruki’s mind went blank as he tried to catch up with what Yu was saying. 

“Yes, why?” Maruki looked at his glass. Is something wrong? I didn’t really want water when I’m visiting a cafe, but it’s too hot for a hot drink.

“With chocolate cake. Doesn’t that taste bad?” Yu was pretty direct about his question. Any tension from the previous conversation dispersed as Maruki laughed, realising that the combination was in fact pretty weird.

“I didn’t actually think about it. I’ve just been drinking the juice, I probably should eat the cake before it heats up. I think I can deal with the taste for a bit.” Maruki kept his smile and shook his head. He began to focus on it but realised the taste became pretty sour with the flavours clashing like that. He winced, shutting his eyes and shaking his head pretty quickly. Yu smiled, it seemed like he found that pretty amusing but it wasn’t quite worth a laugh. 

“They were meant to be consumed separately. Ugh, but I think the apple juice is out of my mouth now at least. It was good juice.” Maruki smiled again, looking down at his plate. When he heard the familiar rumbling of a scooter engine he sat up straight. 

“Oh no, have I kept you?” Maruki looked around for the time quickly but remembered that he put his phone in his pocket. Yu bet him to it, since it was just sitting on the table. 

“No, Yosuke’s early.” Yu looked over to the scooter and Maruki did the same. The brunette, now known as Yosuke parked and gestured from the side of the road with an exaggerated shrug. Yu shook his head and turned his hand over flat, as if offering for him to come over. Yosuke scratched the back of his head for a moment before giving in, turning the scooter off and taking the keys out of it so that he could come up to the wooden fence. 

“Wow, you look short from down there!” Yu joked, standing up from his seat to come closer to the bannister. Yosuke’s face showed shock and betrayal.

“What?! Where’s ‘hello’, where’s ‘how have you been’? Uh, hello, by the way. You’re Maruki, right?” Yosuke took a brief second to acknowledge Maruki was there. Maruki smiled and nodded. 

“I saw you a little more than half an hour ago. Did the world end while I wasn’t looking?” Yu knelt down so that he could see Yosuke a little clearer through the fence. It was raised a bit from the ground after all. Yosuke held onto the poles like he was in jail. 

“No, you’re still standing here…” Yosuke initially started that sentence with confidence before it shrivelled up and died halfway through. He shook his head, sighing with the embarrassment that came out in his throat. I am now third wheeling. Maruki ate some of his cake, trying not to be awkward. Yep, I now understand how Shibu might have felt. When should I apologise to him?

“You’ll get it next time. Are you going to come up and get a drink or something or do you want to head off?” Yu smiled. It had such warmth, not like his smiles before. I have to admit that they’re very cute together. I’m cheering for you! Maruki took another sip of his apple juice before heavily concealing the twang he felt from the clashing flavours.

“Nah, I’ve really gotta head home soon. I have a report due soon and I’m probably gonna have to lock myself inside if I’m going to do it properly. Do you feel like going home yet?” Yosuke smiled as Yu took his hands.

“I’m not going to make you come back for me. Sorry, Maruki but I have to go.” Yu stood up, letting go of Yosuke’s hands to do so. Maruki shook his head, wanting to wave that apology away.

“No, no, that’s okay. Assignments are important - I know how they can be like. Good luck, Yosuke! Bye Yu, it was nice talking to you!” Maruki waved to them both with a smile. Yu smiled a little and waved back before he walked through the cafe to come meet Yosuke outside. He put an arm around Yosuke, who brought his head down to look at the ground with a shy smile on his face. Maruki could no longer hear what they were saying as they walked to the scooter, but he could see Yu shake his head and smile at Yosuke with that warmth from earlier. 

Maruki looked down to finish off his cake, hearing the engine start and the scooter take off shortly after that. What Yu said about the TV world being similar to a collective consciousness is interesting. If such a small town can have something like that, then does Tokyo have something similar? Maruki hummed quietly as he ate. His glass was empty by now, leaving him with the cake on his plate. I was too busy with the conversation to finish this. The cherry filling is the best part. Maruki beamed, pretty happy with his choice despite the clash with the apple juice from earlier. Today was a pretty good day, it felt like he had nothing to worry about at all.

On his way back home Maruki stepped out into the open air above the Shibuya train station. He went to walk home, but remembered something he thought about the other night. He hesitated for a second before he turned around, walking through the plaza to the central street, where he found the bookstore. Once inside he flipped through a few different kinds of books before fully deciding on one. ‘ How To Karakuri ’, a book on the details of Karakuri mechanisms. Would he find this interesting? I saw one on guns, but… I don’t think that’s going to really work out well with the security staff, and I’d rather not use my ability for something like this. He closed the book and smiled. Well, he doesn’t have to accept it. I’m not going to force him to have it. He handed the money over and brought it home.

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 11th 20XX

Adachi had me in a corner today. I couldn’t try my ability again, I completely forgot.

The only progress I made in that session was some better understanding of how Adachi works… 

In exchange for his continual cooperation, he asked to see the research paper after I was done with it. I keep trying to make sense of that, but the only thing I keep coming back to is what he told me his reason was - and I don’t know if that was a half truth or a lie. He said something like ‘I want to know what you’re doing with this information’ and ‘You lied your way through to get here’. 

Does he even know anything about cognitive psience? I didn’t really tell him what the paper was on either. 

It is now the 12th. I met with Yu Narukami, who was nothing but helpful to understanding why my ability wasn’t working. While we didn’t speak too much on it, the implications of Yu’s words helped me to understand pretty quickly that my power might not work on someone who has experienced cognitive worlds. I didn’t want to push him further than he had already spoken as he began to look uncomfortable, but it was clear to me that he and Adachi both stepped foot into a ‘collective consciousness’. While I don’t know the specifics of those details, it stands to be the only solid difference between Adachi and other clients. 

I bought him a book. I’m not sure if he actually wants something to read, but it might help with the boredom that he feels in regards to prison. It turns out that it’s quite hard to pick out a book for someone like Adachi - I wasn’t really sure what he would like. Regardless, I guess it opens the conversation up for that kind of discussion?

Chapter Text

Maruki stood at the door of his office, holding that book in his hands. Where can I put this? I think Adachi is more likely to reject it if I just try to hand it to him… Let alone, if I say that I got it specifically for him. He looked at the desk for a few seconds before he set the book off to one side on the client’s side. If it’s just left here, maybe he’ll take it with him? He stepped back to take a look at it again. Now that I think about it, the last time I was in this room he was pretty erratic… Is it weird to try and give him a gift like this? His shoulders fell as he thought about it. I was about to call for help. I’ll just think of it as trying to cure his boredom so that he doesn’t spend our sessions trying to take that out on me. He sighed, taking a step forward to flip the book over to show the blurb rather than the title. He was just about to go to his side to sit, but there was a knock on the door. Maruki looked up to the clock. That’s right on time…

Maruki came over to his side of the desk to give Adachi room to walk in. He smiled and Adachi smiled back, until the door shut. His smile became more irritated as he placed his hands on the back of his seat, refusing to sit down. Maruki sat down, though he was pretty confused. Maybe it’s been a difficult day for him? 

“ Maruki. I think you want to explain something to me, very quickly.” Maruki went blank. Is that the first time he’s used my actual name? Maybe it’s the second time now. He frowned, folding his hands over the table. Adachi’s fingers dug into the back of the chair and the knuckles were going white. 

“What happened? I don’t know what you want me to explain.” Maruki watched Adachi lean over the back of the chair, his face darkening with a hint of shock as he watched Maruki’s cluelessness on the matter. I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what happened. I can’t apologise for something that I don’t know about. Adachi shook his head in disbelief, looking Maruki over before he finally gave him the hint.

“I’ve heard you’ve been talking about me behind my back. Is that sparking anything yet?” Adachi’s smile faded as he spoke, leaving only the irritation behind. Maruki slowly connected the dots. 

“... Did Yu tell you?” And his heart dropped. Oh no. I think my actions are showing their consequences. Adachi stood up straight, keeping his hands where they were on the chair.

“You bet he did. What the fuck do you think you’re trying to pull? And with Dojima?” Adachi held his hands out, questioning Maruki with an exaggerated movement. Maruki’s good mood melted away completely as the guilt rose to take its place. 

“I’m sorry.” It was the only thing he could really say right now. He needed time to figure out what he was going to say, but Adachi showed that he’d been thinking about this pretty clearly for a while now.

“Is this not good enough for you? You don’t think I can answer questions that concern me? Is that what this is?” There was a darkness in his voice, in his face. It was different from last time, last time it was a cruel kind of playfulness but now it was a kind of anger and pain that intertwined. Maruki’s brows furrowed as he tried to figure out where that line of contemplation came from. 

“When you have a question about me , you ask me ! Don’t involve other people in your freak shit! You’re very fucking lucky I had a shred of mercy for you, because Yu’s a pretty bright kid. He told me that you asked me for permission to contact my visitors. I went along with it, you know, to save your ass from becoming my neighbour!” Adachi lost it, letting go of the chair as he had to wander to get the irritation out of his body. Maruki squeezed his hands together, deciding to let Adachi keep talking.

“You’re really fucking dumb, you know that? Are you sure you finished university okay? Did your teachers give you a pity pass for every subject? I bet if I lined all of your brain cells up against a ruler with a microscope I still couldn’t measure your intelligence, because there is none. Where? Where is it? I bet when you were born the doctors were worried about your skull caving in because of how little there was in there!” Adachi looked at Maruki and ran a hand through his hair, stepping away to the door. Maruki went to stand before he held a hand out.

“Don’t you fucking dare . I’m not a coward like you, I’m not going to go run with a tail between my legs.” Adachi shook his head, taking a slow breath in. Maruki moved back into his chair, pressing his thumb into the back corner of his other hand, where the other thumb sat and flexed in accordance to where he pressed. He pressed too tightly and switched hands to press on the other. It was quiet for a while, though he was surprised by one thing - Adachi didn’t attack him, or touch him for that matter. Adachi stayed close to the wall the door was attached to, taking slow breaths in. I’m so sorry, Adachi. I wish my mouth could move right now, but I don’t think trying to do that now would help you calm down. Adachi took one more deep breath in and sighed, taking a look at the desk. 

“What the fuck is that.” Adachi kept his eyes on one corner of the table. Maruki looked up to him quickly, then to where he was looking. Oh no. That book is going to make it worse. Maruki winced as he thought about it.

“A book. For you?..” Maruki smiled awkwardly with a shrug. Adachi stared in disbelief. Is that a good kind of disbelief?  

“Wow, amazing, thank you for making that clear to me! Doc, I can’t fucking-” Adachi brought a hand to his hair and took a slow breath in again as he cut himself off. No, that’s not good. He’s not happy. He’s not happy at all. 

“I can’t take that with me into my cell. What am I supposed to do with that? If they see me with that, they’re just going to throw it in the bin or something. Did you think for more than five seconds?” Every word Adachi said held back that anger, it was cooling down slowly but the irritation fed it bit by bit. Maruki laughed awkwardly, trying to think of a solution to that as the stress built in his body. 

“Maybe instead of talking today you can just read? I’ll work, you read. If you want. I don’t know. I’m sorry.” Maruki sighed, he was stuck processing a lot at once. The way he felt earlier to now, and about the fact that Adachi was pretty pissed off by his actions. Adachi walked over to the chair and pulled it out, sitting down pretty quickly. 

“No. You’re gonna learn how to treat me like a human being first. You don’t just get to pretend it didn’t happen.” Adachi’s expression dulled as he rested his arms on the chair. Maruki frowned, but he did accept that he needed to hear what Adachi had to say. 

“Take a guess at which act was passed in the year 2003? I’ll give you a hint, because you broke that law like you crack your knuckles each morning. Hang on, do you even know what the privacy act is?” Adachi folded his arms as he waited for Maruki to respond. Maruki sighed, shifting his hands to sit on the desk.

“I know what the privacy act is.” Maruki couldn’t really make eye contact with Adachi right now. He stared at his hands. Here it goes. 

“Clearly you don’t, and they didn’t teach you as a medical professional. It got updated a few times but the gist of it is, you can’t just stick your head in business that doesn’t concern you. You count as part of a business, don’t you? Granted, you’re operating on your own right now but as far as the facility knows, you’re part of a business. I don’t even want to get into fraudulent business right now.” Adachi sighed, shaking his head. 

“One of the articles should go something like ‘A business should not handle private information more than what’s necessary in the scope of their work’, or something like that. What did you do once you got the private contact information off of the visitor’s log?” Adachi waited for Maruki to answer.

“I used it, I’m assuming you want me to add, outside of the scope that is necessary for work - but it…” Maruki hesitated. Adachi tilted his head slightly. 

“What. You wanted to know what my favourite colour was so badly? How is that necessary for your research?” Adachi waited. Maruki took his glasses off carefully and set them aside. Alright, I should just come out and say it.  

“My research is in cognitive psience…” Adachi made a gesture with his hand turning over flat, as if asking what is that? “It concerns an area of science that looks into how the condition of someone’s cognition can create cognitive worlds. When I heard about the TV World, it became something that I wanted to know more about.” Maruki began, but Adachi shook his head.

“Uh, sorry to burst your bubble, but you would have only heard of that after you asked Dojima about me first, if what Yu said was true. Something else made you go that far.” Adachi’s face remained dull and expressionless, his body didn’t move at all outside of what was necessary to talk. Maruki smiled awkwardly and apologetically. He’s so perceptive. Trying to say anything is like having a giant spotlight on me. I couldn’t even hide that part. What should I do?

“Well, as part of my research I tried some cognitive exercises. They’re not supposed to be super noticeable, and you had no reaction to them - I think. I found out those exercises weren’t working on you, and I wanted to ask why, but again - at that time I was fully hiding the research aspect from you. Because those exercises failed, I went looking for an explanation.” I’ll call it that for now. Adachi stayed silent, staring at him as he had been for the past five minutes. Then he slowly shook his head.

“You’re such a freak, you know that? No wonder something felt familiar. It was so weak I brushed it off as me not having enough sleep or something.” Adachi sighed. Maruki’s brows furrowed as he tried to understand what Adachi meant. 

“So because your little experiments didn’t work, you went to my ‘ friends ’ to figure out what happened. Then you found out about the TV World and that was it? How do you know that we weren’t just making it up or something?” Adachi kicked one leg over the other as he spoke. 

“Well, it’s hard to deny something when everyone says the same thing without planning that beforehand. I’ve never been inside a world like that, but the proof of their existence lies with people like you, who have seen those worlds for yourselves. Do you remember why the judges of your trial gave you only twenty years, as opposed to life in prison or the death penalty?” Maruki leaned onto the table.

“Yeah, mental health, whatever it was. They never got a doctor’s note, is that where you’re going?” Adachi started to kick his leg gently. Maruki nodded, smiling a little as he came to appreciate Adachi’s perceptiveness. 

“Right. That sparked the whole thing. There was no way to know if you would want to work with me. No one else knows about the research I’m doing right now except you and one other person. Well, okay, now Yu knows.” Maruki’s smile became awkward as he remembered what he rattled off to him the other day. 

“Who is…?” Adachi watched him. Maruki went to answer, but realised that it might be a test after Adachi started talking about the law. 

“An anonymous contributor?” Maruki smiled awkwardly. 

“There you go. Was it so hard, Doc?” Adachi smiled in his usual friendly way. 

“Well, still. I’m really sorry about what I did. I appreciate that, even if you did feel betrayed by my actions, you wanted to speak to me again. That you went along with it, for that moment. I’m really grateful for that.” Maruki’s smile became more genuine. Adachi folded his arms again as he looked at the book. 

“So, the book. Is this part of your freak exercises?” Adachi brushed it off. Well, I expected you to dodge that. That’s okay.  

“Yeah, when you mentioned that you wanted to read my research, I thought you might like a book or something like that in the meantime? I wasn’t sure if you actually wanted to read, or if you were just curious about cognitive psience as a whole, so…” Maruki took his glasses carefully and set them back on his face. Adachi’s brows furrowed as he stared at it. 

“You’re really fucking weird, Doc. I made it clear that I just wanted to know what you needed me for and what you wanted to prove but you didn’t want to talk about it. So I asked for your report.” Adachi shook his head. Maruki’s smile became apologetic as he went to grab the book, but Adachi took it first. 

“How about you just do your work. If I read this, you’ll stop talking to me, right?” Adachi opened the book. Maruki’s shoulders deflated as he realised that Adachi actually wanted to read it. Adachi, it’s okay to accept a gift. You don’t automatically become a good person when you accept someone else’s present.

“Don’t you have a deadline or something? Jeez, no wonder you have to rely on everyone else for answers. You’re so lazy you’d rather stare off into space than type a few words on a keyboard.” Adachi turned from him so that he could read his book in peace. Maruki tried to hide a smile as he stood up and searched his bag for his laptop. He set it up on the desk and started to work. 

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 18th 20XX 

Adachi accepted the book, but he wasn’t happy about my investigation into him. He said ‘if you have a question about me, ask me’. We talked as honestly as I could manage for a while, about the TV World and my research.

I should have thought this through more than I did. It was never my intention to offend or upset Adachi, and I apologised for that. He doesn’t really take apologies well, though. I want to

In the time that it took for Maruki to word that properly and to think about what to say, a knock came from the door - which surprised Maruki, considering that he’d never run out of time with Adachi before. Adachi sighed, folding the corner of the page he was at. He tossed it lightly onto the table and stood up. 

“Alright, see ya Doc.” It was short and direct. It wasn’t like he was teasing Maruki as he left or telling him to ‘go cry about it’, it was the first time he’d genuinely been forced to leave due to time constraints. Maruki smiled and tilted his laptop screen down to address him properly. 

“Goodbye, Adachi. I’ll bring this book back for you next week, I won’t forget.” Maruki laughed a little as Adachi rolled his eyes, allowing Warden Maeda in to go through her formalities again. Then away and down the hallway he went. Being so close to the door, I think he was aware that he could be heard. He decided that since he’d started Adachi’s report, now would be a good time to finish it. 

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 18th 20XX

Adachi accepted the book, but he wasn’t happy about my investigation into him. He said ‘if you have a question about me, ask me’. We talked as honestly as I could manage for a while, about the TV World and my research.

I should have thought this through more than I did. It was never my intention to offend or upset Adachi, and I apologised for that. He doesn’t really take apologies well, though. I want to show him more respect than I have. 

I’ll bring some questions with me next week. And the book. I didn’t really get to do a lot today.

It might be hard to rebuild the trust I broke, but I’m going to do my best. 

Chapter Text

Maruki sat quietly in his office, wondering about what the best way to set up would be now that he had offered Adachi the ability to just read in a corner instead of engaging in counselling. I don’t want to sit my laptop on the desk like I’ve already decided what I want to do today. It should be his choice… Maruki thought about it for a few seconds before he stood up to grab his bag. He sat back down and set it beside his chair. I just have to hope I don’t get up and crush it once the session is done. Maruki sat with his hands in his lap, watching the clock for a moment while he mentally went over the questions he had prepared for Adachi in case he did want to talk more. Again, it’s his choice. I don’t want to act like I already have an idea of how this is going to go. He reached into his bag for the book and set it on the client side of the table. After that the familiar knock came back and Maruki smiled at Adachi, who walked in. 

“Hey Doc!” Adachi smiled, his friendly persona was back. When the door shut he sat down, looking at the book for a moment before he focussed on Maruki. He released that smile but he didn’t seem to be upset. Maruki folded his hands over the table.

“Hey there. How do you feel about today? Would you rather read or talk?” Maruki offered, though it seemed like Adachi had already made up his mind long ago. He took up the book and sighed, searching for the page. 

“I’m gonna read. You go do whatever you want.” When Adachi found that page he took the fold and pressed it out, though it remained still a bit crooked it seemed like he didn’t want to waste too much time on making it perfect. Maruki shrugged, keeping his smile as he leaned over for his laptop. 

“Okay, have fun with that.” Maruki pulled his laptop onto the desk, seeing Adachi’s expression dull for a moment before he shook his head, focussing back on the book. Whoops. I guess that was a small direction, huh? At least that didn’t bother him too much. Maruki pulled open the laptop screen and logged in, debating on what he should do with the sudden free time that he had. I had hoped that Adachi would be able to take it with him, but it does make sense that it wouldn’t work out that way. The wardens are really strict - the fact that I had to use an ability like mine to get my way proves that they wouldn’t be convinced very easily even if I’m just an outside party. He paused for a second at the options he had to work on, but chose to open his research document. I tend to only work on this at night lately, so it’s nice to be able to do it while the sun’s still up.

On Matters of The Heart - How Cognition Can Heal Psychological Wounds

Takuto Maruki - Independent Researcher 

Abstract: The scope of this study sought to see the effect of Cognitive Adaptation on the trauma-afflicted. We conducted an experimental study in two different environments: one in the educational sector and another in the legal sector. explain more here

Keywords: cognitive world, heart, trauma response, distortion, collective consciousness
add more to navigate as finalised

Maruki sighed, scrolling through his work. A lot of it right now was in plain speak, loose descriptions and occasionally very well constructed paragraphs where he had been more awake and focussed. A lot of sections had small notes like ‘don’t forget to’ and ‘please for your sake try to import the spreadsheet soon’. He picked a section to refine into what would be more suitable for an academic paper and worked at it, occasionally giving himself a couple of minutes as a break to drink something and be more aware of his surroundings. 

From the point that Maruki had begun work, Adachi had shifted around a few times from what he could notice. He started that book facing Maruki directly, but had since shifted toward the clock in the room with one leg kicked over the other, kicking gently as he read. It turns out that he moves a lot when he’s not focussing on a conversation. It feels like he barely moves sometimes… Adachi flipped the page before switching his grip on the book to sit his thumb inside the crevice as he turned his head to look at Maruki.

“What do you want?” Oh, he noticed pretty quickly. Maruki smiled awkwardly, realising that he might have been staring for longer than he thought. Maruki tilted his laptop screen down, deciding that maybe now was an okay time to mention one of the questions he’d been thinking about. 

“I wasn’t really thinking about anything. You did remind me about something though, if you’re okay with talking about the TV World for a little bit?” Maruki tried his best to bring it up gently. Adachi looked back to his book for a moment and sighed as he sat the book face down and open on his side of the desk. 

“Alright, spill it then. I’m bored of that book anyway.” Adachi turned to face Maruki properly. Oh, is he really? Maruki looked down at the book. That’s crazy, it’s nearly done? He reads fast. Adachi shook his head.

“Don’t act that surprised. Did you even learn how to speed read? Isn’t that important for those long as hell papers you have to read?” Adachi’s brows furrowed as he tried to figure out how Maruki missed out on these kinds of skills. Maruki smiled awkwardly as he shut his laptop entirely.

“Well, I survived. Does it make reading the law easier?” Maruki tilted his head slightly, though he was prepared to switch straight into the question he’d been thinking about. Adachi shook his head.

“Sure it does, if you want to completely forget it after five minutes. It feels like they make up a new word every time a new act is released. What does this have to do with the TV World?” Adachi put the conversation back on track for Maruki. There was a pause and an apologetic look from Maruki before he continued.

“I was wondering, how do you access the TV World? I’ve only got a very loose understanding of it right now.” Maruki folded his hands into his lap as he let Adachi collect his thoughts. Adachi’s face contorted into an expression that looked like he was about to say something like ‘that’s obvious’, but he realised who he was talking to again. Yes, Adachi, I have no clue. I have knowledge of it existing, but I’ve never been. Adachi relaxed, letting his arms dangle off of his chair.

“Let’s start from the beginning. If you’re ready at any point to put me in a psych ward, just know I’ll curse you when I die.” Adachi smiled a little. I’m pretty sure it’s one hundred percent confirmed that I believe you, but go on. Maruki stayed quiet, not wanting to interject right now.

“You step into a TV. Seems like it was an Inaba-exclusive thing though, bearing that all of the TVs in here are conveniently hoisted up into a corner if they do exist around here. It might be a bit suspicious to see a prisoner hopping up, trying to tap the TV.” Adachi looked at the table as he spoke, like he was searching for something he couldn’t touch. 

“Anyway, if you didn’t have permission you couldn’t come in. How that ‘permission’ works… Quick question, do you believe in gods?” Adachi sighed, knowing exactly how he looked. Maruki went blank. No, I don’t. I shouldn’t dismiss something like this just because of something like that, though.

“I don’t. Why do you mention it?” Maruki kept an open mind - he wasn’t going to shun Adachi for any belief that he had. 

“Me neither, before I was just handed access to that world. As it turns out, anything can happen if enough people believe in it, even if there’s no evidence to support their existence.” Adachi folded his arms, ignoring the look of surprise on Maruki’s face. I mean, okay if a cognitive world exists, and religion is a common part of the Heart, of course those gods would exist in the cognitive space. How did that slip my mind?

“My understanding is still a bit loose, as it turns out gods don’t exactly like to explain themselves to humans. What I got told is that a god let me through. That god had other fragments and that’s how ‘the game’ began. Only someone with that permission can enter, but if someone else joined them at the same time from the same place, that permission was also granted to them. It’s like a sticker roll, everyone gets one if they ask the right person.” That’s interesting. ‘Permission’, so not everyone could just touch the screen and fall in. There’s something missing, though. I feel it in the way that he’s talking and expressing himself in his body language. He’s dodging a detail - it likely has something to do with Yu, so I don’t want to push on it. 

“That’s really interesting. And you have no experience with other cognitive worlds, right?” Maruki wanted to clarify that. Adachi nodded, letting him finish his thought. 

“So then it’s like a gate. Does it remember who it lets in, or do they need to be accompanied by that one person every time?” Maruki was curious about that. Adachi picked up his book again and folded the corner of the page as he spoke. It looks like he’s decided that this might take a while.

“Yep, you’re taking this pretty easily. They can just run in by themselves if they want afterward. I can’t say that doing that is very smart, though. It’s not really a place for little humans like us.” Adachi set the book back down, closed this time. He set his hands on the arms of his chair.

“Well, by the fact that there has to be ‘permission’ granted, I can see why. What was it like in that world?” Maruki decided that it would be better to be direct about his questions rather than trying to perfectly weave them into the conversation. 

“Foggy. It’s a bit hard to breathe the first time around or so, that fog is dense . Because the only way to get back out is through a TV, it’s pretty easy to get yourself lost too. I found a place that I liked and set up camp there, so I got used to it while I lazed around. That was after the murders happened.” Adachi didn’t dodge that topic at all. Maruki didn’t flinch either, though the conversation turning to that talk did make his heart sink a little bit as he remembered what Adachi did.

“As it turns out, Shadows hate people. I don’t know about them so much as they exist in that world and absolutely hate people. They’re these shadowy, gunky looking things that can do nothing but crawl on the ground - I think in groups. When they get broken up then they form into shit like - I don’t know.” Adachi thought about it for a short while. 

“I remember one of them was a baby or something with a flower sticking out of its head, a floating mouth hot glued to a ball and something like a tank. Wild shit, I don’t know why they take those forms. It sounds really stupid, because it is.” Adachi sighed, folding his arms as he thought about it some more. Maruki didn’t mean to show that he was really lost on his face, but he happened to notice when Adachi looked back at him. 

“Look. Scary evil creatures, boogeymen, come and kill you if you get caught. Okay?” Adachi held up his hands, splaying his fingers out like claws. Maruki smiled and laughed a little, appreciating the shorter explanation.

“Okay, so then…” Maruki realised what he was about to ask next. Adachi set his hands back down and waited with a dull expression as he could read Maruki’s face.

“You let those Shadows kill your victims.” It didn’t sound like much of a question - more like the answer had slipped out of his mouth.

“You get an A for that. I didn’t know it at the time, but once I stepped foot in there myself I realised how they died. Well, okay - for clarification, that Yamano bitch took her own life, but I digress. Funny how the bodies ended up, just dangling from those TV antennas on peoples’ houses. The world is always open so I have no clue how they got moved into the real world like that.” Adachi’s expression was dull and his body was still as he recounted that memory. It’s hard to tell if he feels anything for them… Maruki frowned. 

“Please don’t say that it’s funny.” Maruki watched Adachi roll his eyes. He took up the book again and turned away a bit from the desk. 

“Funny weird, not funny amusing, Doc. If that’s all you’ve got to say, then I assume you’re done asking questions.” Adachi flipped open the book. Maruki sighed, letting his frustration settle into the depths of his chest for now. I know he can be helped, and I know it will help others. He looked at the table for a moment or two, thinking about how he could keep Adachi engaged.

“Hey. Why did you become an officer in the first place? I’m not trying to judge you, it’s just out of curiosity.” Maruki made his attempt to switch the conversation. Adachi sighed slowly as he messed with the corner of the page that he folded. 

“You love just running your mouth. Don’t you ever get tired? How much energy do you go through in a day just yapping?” Adachi pressed the corner in more. Maruki smiled a little as he watched him. 

“You don’t have to tell me. You could just save your energy and tell me that you don’t want to talk about it.” Maruki directed it back onto Adachi. He shook his head and sat the book in his lap, keeping it open with his hand as he spoke. 

“You’re annoying as hell. I was a stupid kid, alright? I wanted to be able to carry a gun. I fucked around and I got told for it. Have you seriously never heard that story?” Adachi’s eyes moved to scan the page again during the short pause of the conversation.

“No, it’s actually not on your record. I’m pretty sure the news just said you got transferred, not held accountable.” Maruki tried to think back on it. It’s not really a detail I focussed on when I read the reports. I was more upset with the main part of the news story.

“Huh. Colour me surprised then. The police really protect their own skin a lot, don’t they? It’s not like I killed someone so I guess they could pass it off as an accident. I was only a couple of years into the field after all. The paperwork was insane.” Adachi flipped the page. I honestly don’t know how he’s managing to do that. I think he stops reading when he speaks, but it’s very hard to tell.

“I mean… I’ve seen the promotional videos for the police force. I think it’s easy to get caught up in a romanticised idea about that sort of thing - The government does try its best to show officers in a good light. If people didn’t trust the police, they’d lose power, wouldn’t they?” Maruki hummed, thinking about that thought a little more. Adachi shrugged. 

“I guess so. I stopped really caring once my badge was taken from me. I’m trying to focus on what’s going to happen when I get out of here because man, it’s boring as hell here.” Adachi lifted the book gently and changed which leg he had resting on what knee. He set the book back in his lap once he was done. 

“Oh, do you have plans?” Maruki tried not to show his surprise. I didn’t realise that he would, but it makes sense. It’s kind of the only thing you can think about, right? Adachi nodded a little as he turned to the next page. 

“Yeah. I’m gonna start a Karakuri business, selling dolls.” Adachi turned to look at Maruki properly. Maruki stared at the book cover, then back to Adachi as he tried to figure out if he was joking or not. Adachi smiled a little, brows furrowing as he laughed at Maruki’s blank stare.

“No, I don’t have goals like that. I don’t know what the hell kind of work I’ll pick up once I’m done here. I haven’t thought about it yet, I’m a quarter of the way through this jail sentence.” Adachi’s face slowly drained of that smile as he looked back at his book. 

“Please don’t make it hospitality.” Maruki joked, watching Adachi scan the page briefly again.  Maruki tilted his head slightly, thinking about it more as he watched Adachi’s eyes stop and he began speaking again. So he is just pausing whenever he has to speak.

“Wow, I’m hurt. Locking me out of jobs already? You’re lucky that hospitality would be a shit industry to start again in anyway.” Adachi hummed, smiling a bit before turning to Maruki again to smile more, switching to a more teasing expression.

“You read really fast, and you can do it while talking. Since we both agree hospitality isn’t for you, maybe a desk job of some kind? Oh, but you didn’t really like doing paperwork, right? Maybe something else.” Maruki shook his head, trying to figure that out as his ‘school’ counsellor mode kicked in. Adachi turned his head back to give him a dull look. 

“Yeah, thanks. Can you handle my resume and my referees too? Oh, and you can show up for the interviews, too.” Adachi shook his head, looking back to his book again. Maruki smiled and shook his head.

“That makes it sound like I’m your assistant or something. ‘Oh, yes, the ten o’clock appointment. Right this way please, sit here and Mister Adachi will call you’. ” Maruki laughed a little, it became a bit louder as he saw Adachi’s perplexed face. 

“That isn’t how a secretary works…” Adachi trailed off, another page pinched between his fingers. “Well, why’d you choose to be- whatever the hell you are again?” His other hand gestured like he was sweeping his comment away. 

“Oh, well… Truth be told, I haven’t… Been a counsellor for a very long time. I finished my education but it was more to do with cognitive psience. That’s… Why I’m not a therapist, just a counsellor.” Maruki smiled awkwardly, and it got worse as Adachi kept staring at him with that judgement.

“Your lies work wonders for you, don’t they? You’ve got such an unassuming look, too. You’d really be a force to be reckoned with if you actually put that to use.” Adachi laughed a little, thinking about it. Maruki’s smile didn’t change as he shook his head. 

“‘A force to be reckoned with’, how? I don’t really know what you mean.” Maruki looked up to the time, causing Adachi’s eyes to follow. He picked up his laptop carefully and tucked it into his bag, leaning from the side of his chair to do so. 

“Yeah, that’s about what I mean. You’ll work it out one day, when you finally notice it.” Adachi stood up, setting the book down. He paused for a few seconds, staring at the cover with an expression like he was grossed out for a few seconds. Maruki watched him for a little before he went to ask, but Adachi shook his head. 

“If you want me to come back, another book is a great idea.” He is so averse to saying ‘I would like another book, please’. Maruki smiled, standing up with his bag. 

“So you finished it already. I’ll have to find a series you can enjoy, is there any genre you particularly like?” Maruki took the book off of the desk and tucked it into his bag. Adachi had to think about that for a little bit, as if he’d never thought about it before. It took him a short while before he answered.

“I don’t know. Try a thriller, reading something so boring as nonfiction almost puts me to sleep.” Adachi made a sweeping gesture with his hand, wanting to move on from it pretty quickly. Maruki paused for a moment before he added on.

“But there’s also creative nonfic-... That’s alright. A thriller series, I’ll try to look for something like that.” Maruki shook his head, deciding that it would be a whole other can of worms to try and introduce Adachi to creative nonfiction. Adachi smiled a little and turned around, needing only one step to get to the door and knock on it. 

“Alright then. See ya, Doc.” Maruki rushed to say the next part before Warden Maeda could open the door. 

“Goodbye, Adachi.” Maruki smiled, giving Maeda the proper attention as she ran through her formalities and walked Adachi away. A thriller series. I’ll try to find a set for you.  

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 25th 20XX

I learnt more about the TV World from Adachi today. From what I gather, entry to the TV World is like a gate - if you don’t have the right permission, you can’t come in. If other cognitive worlds are similar, they might have gate-like mechanics too and only allow certain people in.

If that’s the case, it’s becoming clearer why cognitive psience has no anecdotes of those worlds. The problem is, if I wanted to investigate that myself, how would I ‘gain permission’? It felt like Adachi was holding back some information from me, but now is not the time to push on that. I’ve already given him a reason to stop trusting me. Adachi is the only person who will openly talk to me about that other world. 

Don’t forget - I need to get a thriller book set for Adachi. He talked about being taught to speed read, so I think having a few books with me is a good idea. Would two be enough for one session? I don’t expect him to just blitz through a book like that, but I don’t want to bring the whole set and bring attention to the fact that I’ve started bringing books with me… Need to work that out

Chapter Text

Maruki flipped through book after book, his will weakening after the ninth blurb. None of this sounds like what Adachi would like. The bookstore had only two or three other people in it, as far as Maruki could tell - something he was grateful for, considering that he’d been standing in one spot for half an hour already. He set that book back where he pulled it from and sighed, running a hand through his hair as he looked around the thriller section again. It’s pretty hard to pick out a book like this. I don’t read thrillers myself.  

Maruki picked out a book at random, deciding that it might be better to do that than to go by title alone. He flipped it over to the back and brought his glasses a bit closer to his face so that he wouldn’t have to lean in so much when he read it. ‘Follow Leah as she uncovers the brutal paper trail of lies her friend left after her death. She has until Joy’s funeral to reveal the truth - but she doesn’t know what danger awaits her.’ Maruki tilted his head as he opened the book to a random page. 

‘Leah kept her jaw firmly shut, letting her breath unwind slowly as she hid beside the clock. She believed in no god yet, for the first time in her life with her back pressed against the wall - she prayed. She promised her atonement for sin in return for a normal life, which was only briefly interrupted by a shattering noise in the next room. Her heart threatened to leave her body and run, but with a hand held firmly to her chest to prevent its escape she came to one agreement - she had to look. As slowly as she could manage she took a microscopic step forward, just enough that she could lean her head slightly around the corner. 

Eyes, yellow, a tapestry of light shone through them. Shards decorated the floor like a poor attempt at a modern art piece, blood crawled across the surface like it was alive. Joy’s frail body barely breathed, the moon’s needle-thin tendrils shone and got caught in the web of stitches that welded her eyes shut. Round, white plastic joints spat in the face of her natural skin, still intact on her forearms and her chest, barely covered a shirt that had become ragged - her favourite shirt, with ‘I Heart Life’ dotted with the cocoons of something, something Leah had no clue about. Leah turned her attention to the creature whose hands shook with an electric hum, standing above the body of her friend. Whatever it was, it wasn’t human.’

Maruki lit up. Oh, Adachi might actually like this one. I’ll keep what I read quiet, that seemed like it was intense. He looked at the title, ‘Seen, Not Heard’ and the author. He picked up the other book in the series and checked its blurb, making sure that he got the full set before he bought them. I can get that back… He tried not to think about the price too much, being that there were only two books to have. I’ll need to get another set later, but these are pretty thick. I’m sure Adachi will pace himself… I hope. He smiled awkwardly, remembering the image of Adachi flicking through the pages as quickly as he did. 

He tucked both books into his bag before he left, finding his way to the prison after a decent walk from the bookstore. There’s no train station that leads close to there, obviously. Could you imagine if a prisoner could escape by sneaking onto the train? Maruki smiled a little, imagining someone in a blue jumpsuit trying to blend in with other strangers on a train. Too obvious. He followed the standard procedure when he came up to the gate, then to the door where he was checked over for weapons. He showed his phone and laptop, hearing the basic rundown and exceptions that he was granted, his mind wandering to the questions he wanted to ask today. Nothing has really happened with the others. Yes, everything was successful, and it proved my hypothesis nearly 100% on how I can best use my abilities and cognitive psience to heal mental wounds, but… Adachi remains the outlier. He took his phone and laptop back. I have a clearer understanding of what’s going on, but it’s still quite vague. I wish I had a better understanding, it feels like everyone who has intimate knowledge of what’s going on is walking on eggshells around me. 

He frowned at that thought as he walked down the hallway. What is it that I’m possibly missing? How big is that hole? You can’t tell when you stand on the edge of it like this, the gap between my current knowledge and full knowledge of the matter. He opened the door to his office and stepped inside, barely getting a breath in before his first guest appeared. He set his bag down beside his chair and smiled, switching between his current mood to work mode. Half an hour passed, then Maruki got a ten minute break. Then another guest came and he gave them another half an hour. After that it left him with half an hour, considering one person had now pulled out of the program with a successful history and no need to do any more sessions. Still, Maruki couldn’t pay attention at all - there was no need to, necessarily. That was something he felt bad about. Everyone else, it can be every other person aside from these people who have already received my help. The kids at the school and Adachi are what my mind is set on.  

He sat at his desk, a small pain welling up in his chest. How could I do that to someone? To cast them aside as soon as my own work is done? He stared at the desk, his glasses resting inside the case he finally remembered to bring. I want to… The world shifted, becoming that double-layered reality that he was becoming more familiar with. I want to help everyone. If they no longer need me, isn’t it right to let them go on with their lives? Aren’t I just the last memory they have of their own trauma? He sighed, the cloud of a creature appearing just out of his field of view. I don’t have the energy to face you, unfortunately, my friend. He shut his eyes. 

“Our goal is yet at hand. Persist and beyond the mountain that is your heart, you will lead others to salvation.” Not this speech again. Maruki smiled awkwardly, though the words were soothing - like a kind of warm bath after the winter’s wind. When he managed to pull himself out of his own emotions, he could hear a small shuffling near the door. The double-layered reality faded and when he turned his head to finally look, the creature was long gone. Well, I guess we’ll meet one day properly. Maybe today is not that day. He smiled, preparing himself mentally for the knock - and when that knock happened, he chimed in with a ‘come in!’. 

Adachi looked around the room when he first walked in before he sat down. Is he maybe looking for the books? I haven’t had the chance to take them out yet. Maruki lit up when he realised he could show Adachi what he found. He leaned over to grab the books out of his bag and set them on the table, putting the first book in the series on the top. I’m sorry that I only found two, but here they are.  

“Oh, there they are.” Adachi smiled, showing a friendly face as the door shut. Maruki folded his hands over the table, watching as Adachi took the first book. He flipped to the back to read the blurb. I guess anyone would. Maruki couldn’t hide the suspense on his face, genuinely wanting Adachi to like it. I can just return these, I think. 

“Yep, that’s a thriller.” Adachi shrugged. Neutrality is fine too. Maruki smiled awkwardly, deflating slightly before he saw a small smile tug on Adachi’s lips. I feel like he said that on purpose. Maruki sighed, sitting back up straight. 

“So… How have you been?” He hesitated for a second when he entered the room. I think that was just because he was looking for the books though. Maruki kept an eye on Adachi’s reactions. And I still need to build his trust back. 

“I’ve been the same as I always have. I’m not really the most active member of the prison you could ask.” Adachi answered flatly, opening the book to the first few pages to read. He’s just going to balance talking and reading like he did last time. Is there anything he’s bad at? Maruki gently squeezed his hands together. 

“But you are the most interesting.” Maruki smiled, seeing Adachi pause in his movement. His eyes are just staying still. I could hear a pin drop at this stage… His smile wavered, becoming awkward again. Adachi?

“To you, clearly . With you wandering into other people’s business.” Adachi began reading again, a dull expression coming over his face. He’s become defensive. That isn’t what I intended… I was being honest. Maruki frowned, squeezing his hands a little harder.

“I still feel bad about that. I had my reasons, but I need to talk to you more. I do genuinely apologise… I will keep apologising as long as you need to hear it.” Maruki nodded, though he realised rather quickly that he didn’t have his glasses on. Oh, is that why he looked around? Shoot. He uncurled his hands and grabbed his glasses, setting them carefully on his face before smiling again when he could see Adachi clearer. There you are. Adachi looked over to Maruki properly. 

“Doc, just shut up already. You made your peace when you apologised.” Adachi’s expression came to rest as he looked back at his book. What does that mean, exactly? Maruki looked down at the table to think. If you’re saying that I made my peace, then does that mean that you’ve already accepted that I’ve apologised enough? His brows furrowed in confusion. But that doesn’t mean that you’ve ACCEPTED it. You’ve acknowledged it, more like. He came to find the questions that he built earlier and sighed quietly. I don’t think we could talk about those today, even if I wanted to now. Last time the talk was stunted. Let’s not push it today. He stayed quiet for a while.

“Aren’t you gonna work on your thesis or whatever it was? It’s hard to read when you’re just staring at me.” Adachi turned his chair slightly to face the clock. Oh, you’re right. Maruki sat up carefully and reached over for his bag again. But it’s not a thesis.

“Right, yes. I’m sorry.” That came out quieter than he expected. I didn’t mean to say it like that. When he brought his laptop up he found that there was a look of irritation on Adachi’s face, which got worse when they accidentally made eye contact again. Maruki smiled apologetically and opened his laptop screen. He’s likely upset that it got brought up. I should have been more careful with what I said. He opened his research paper and scrolled through the pages. Something in his chest hurt again. I’m not sure what it is. Just the blatant mistrust, maybe? His lips pressed together into a flat line when another thought crossed his mind. I would have preferred the endless torment you usually bring, where you just find something to tease about me. Somehow that was easier to deflect.  

And so he began to work, the excitement of finding the books and the curiosity of his own questions dripping slowly away. How can I feel nostalgia for something that happened a month, nearly two months ago? He paused on a paragraph that he was rephrasing. I shouldn’t look at him. Still, I have a question.

“Are you really feeling alright today?” Maruki tightened his jaw. I didn’t mean to say that out loud! He tilted his laptop screen down, seeing that Adachi had barely moved through the book. It is a thick book.

“Yeah, just dandy...” There was a brief pause, like Adachi vetoed a decision to end the sentence there. “Hey, could you do me a favour and stop apologising all the time? It makes it harder to enjoy the book if you’re just going to be depressed in a corner the whole time.” Adachi flipped the page over, not bothering to look up from it. Maruki’s shoulders deflated as a smile came across his face. Oh, was that it, really? 

“Is that what upset you, or was it something else?” Maruki shut his laptop screen, building his energy back. Adachi’s brows furrowed as those words came out of Maruki’s mouth. 

“If I could sum it up into a couple of words, don’t you think I would have spat it out already?” Adachi’s expression back dull as he thought of that response. He flipped the page but his eyes didn’t move, keeping on the wrong side. 

“Listen, Doc. You ask the dumbest questions and ask nuanced shit in response. If you want any pointers, you’re really acting your part out as a shrink right now - trying to get an answer that doesn’t exist out of me.” Adachi began to read again, though there was a kind of pain in his eyes as he focussed on that task. Maruki stayed quiet for a moment as he thought about it. 

“So you can’t tell what’s upsetting you, is what you mean.” Maruki smiled apologetically as he felt Adachi’s gaze turn onto him. I know I just went against what you said, but unfortunately for you that was an answer. Adachi shook his head, taking a slow breath in and out before he properly turned to face Maruki. 

“If that’s what you picked up, great for you. What do you want that you’re going out of the way to bother me for? Can you get to the point or do you have to sneak around my back to find it again?” Adachi’s dull expression came back. Maruki’s heart sank as he heard that. He got me there…

“I was actually wondering if you wanted to do some more practical things today, rather than just talking or reading. It doesn’t require anything like physical exercise… There’s just something I’ve been wanting to try with your awareness.” Maruki couldn’t let it go. I want to try again. Adachi squinted at Maruki as he seemed to consider it. You don’t have to, I think it would just break the cycle that we’re currently in where it seems like you don’t like anything I say. He squeezed his hands gently in his lap, quietly hoping that Adachi would agree to it. 

“Practical, how? Don’t tell me you brought a TV in here just to see if I could stick my head through it.” Adachi relaxed a little, sitting back as he questioned Maruki. I think he’s interested. Maruki smiled a little, shaking his head.

“I think that could be interesting, but trying to get a TV in here would be like trying to pass a cake with a knife in it past the security staff…” Maruki let the comparison go, knowing that it wasn’t the best he could make. “I have this thing I can do. This whole time I’ve just been referring to it as ‘my ability’ but I don't really know what it is.” Maruki decided that it was okay to be honest in that regard. Adachi remained still as Maruki spoke. 

“You mentioned before that some people in the prison were acting ‘weird’?” Maruki smiled awkwardly, hoping that it would give Adachi enough reference. Adachi sighed, kicking one leg over the other.

“I knew it was weird. What have you been doing to those guys? Actually, I’ll give you my perspective on this first before you answer that.” Adachi rested his arms on the chair as he seemed to collect his thoughts together. I’m sure it’s a lot to think through, especially when you have the opinion of me that you have right now.

“That guy that I said had a small dick the first time we met - He was working on his anger issues and I wanted to push his buttons, as I do. He actually laughs every time I try to say something to him now. Do you know how drastically different that is?” Adachi’s leg gently kicked as he spoke. Oh, that’s weird. I guess I told him that he should let others’ opinions of him go. Maruki blinked a few times as he heard that. 

“That is pretty different, but I think it’s positive. He isn’t letting anyone bother him now and he gets to focus more on himself.” Maruki smiled, relaxing as he thought about it. Adachi sighed, not having much to say in retaliation to that.

“So what do you want?” Adachi folded his arms, watching Maruki closely. Nothing too much. Maruki thought about it for a second before he stood up and came over to Adachi’s side of the desk, trying to relax his nerves. 

“I just want to know what you see when I do this, and anything else that you notice. I’m standing over here so that you can see me properly, okay?” Maruki showed his hands. Adachi sighed, turning to face Maruki properly. He makes it out like he’s so unwilling, but I know he would just say no and move on if he didn’t want to do anything I just asked. Maruki thought about the change that he wanted Adachi to experience. You should let your friends in. He channelled the power that allowed him to change the cognition of people who came to him for help. 

Adachi sat still, leg still kicking gently over the other as he remained clear as day, almost popping out of the layers of reality that formed and overlaid one another. It stayed for only a short moment before dissolving, brushed away with Maruki’s sigh. It didn’t work, as expected. Maruki held his hands together, signifying through his body language that he was done.

“So that’s what this is.” Adachi slowly smiled, clearly coming across an answer that Maruki didn’t. What is this? Maruki smiled awkwardly, looking between Adachi and the table. What are we talking about?

“Whatever power you have, it’s so weak it’s making me yawn. Sit down, this is going to be an annoying explanation.” Adachi gestured to Maruki’s chair. Did I convince him somehow that I needed that information? What information am I getting, exactly? Maruki came back to his chair and sat, keeping quiet as Adachi explained.

“You have a Persona. That’s really funny, considering you’ve never been in a world like the one I’ve been to, unless you’ve been lying to me this whole time - I’m going to go out on a limb and say that you have no idea what a Persona is or how you got it.” Adachi had a new kind of energy, like he found a commonality between them. Maruki smiled awkwardly. What is a Persona?

“I’m probably not the best person to ask, but I will be the only person you ask. Don’t bother with Yu, he doesn’t need to be involved. Do you know how ugly your Persona is?” Adachi laughed, watching Maruki’s reactions. Maruki’s brows furrowed. I still don’t know what a Persona is. How can a power be ugly? He paused for a second. Is he talking about the creature? I didn’t feel its presence that time. Is it appearing somewhere that I’m not noticing it? His mind raced faster than Adachi could speak. He didn’t even realise that he couldn’t hear Adachi speak - but thankfully Adachi could notice quickly after. 

“ Maruki. Are you there anymore? Did you fry your brain trying to do your weird magic?” The name called him back to the present. Adachi looked Maruki over and sighed, folding his arms again. 

“Per-so-na. Right? Your Persona is like…” Adachi trailed off, looking around the room as if he was trying to figure out how to explain it. “A puppet moving its own strings. It has its own voice, but it’s something you can control, just like a puppet. It does magic, tricks and flips, it’s just an imagination turned real, right?” Adachi looked down at the ground for a second, as if he was picking up a reference somehow. 

“I think I get what you mean?” Maruki smiled apologetically. You’ve completely lost me. ‘Puppet’? That is its own creature, what do you mean ‘it’s a puppet’. Adachi tilted his head, presumably thinking about the situation at hand. 

“You said it was weird that I had a Persona. You said that I’d never ‘been to a world like yours’. Do you know what conditions are required to form a Persona?” Maruki leaned onto the table, trying to tie the loose ends of his own thoughts together. 

“I don’t know. I just know I got mine from…” Adachi paused, like he was about to say something he shouldn’t. Another wall? Maruki became desperate for an answer, but he didn’t want to interject and risk Adachi refusing to tell him anything more. Adachi smiled and simply pointed to the floor where Maruki’s bag was. Maruki’s brows furrowed as he looked down. There it was - a shivering mess of a shadow. 

You? It felt like the room became so much colder when he realised what Adachi was talking about. What are you? Is this where you’ve been this whole time? His brain went blank, unable to come to any answer or connect any dot. The tendrils tried to grip onto the items on the floor in a frantic attempt to remain, but eventually in its fuzzy, unclear shape it failed and regained the silhouette of Maruki. He raised his arm slowly, seeing his shadow behave normally once again.

“It’s having trouble staying in this half of reality, but it sure gets the job done most of the time, huh?” Adachi sat back, looking at Maruki with what felt like a new curiosity. I guess so… Maruki stared at his own shadow. What does this mean? Was it below me when I was using my power, and that’s why I’ve never noticed it around? Maruki held his hands together over the table. 

“So, explain to me again what your ability does? You didn’t give me a run down.” Adachi couldn’t hide away his smile. What does your expression mean? Maruki was in a daze from the information overload. 

“My ability… Seems to change the cognition of the person in front of me. It makes them believe in a change in themselves, sort of like that Change of Heart phenomenon going on, from what I understand of it. Not that I’ve been the one changing hearts.” Maruki slowed himself down to speak, picking his words carefully as a means of calming himself down from the overwhelm. 

“So that’s how you did it. Yeah, they are like new people. And for some reason, it doesn’t work on me, right?” Adachi beamed, for once showing genuine joy in the room. His smile… Maruki blinked slowly, trying to piece together his thoughts before he spoke. 

“Yes, that’s right. I wanted to know what was stopping me, but I went too far.” Maruki felt the guilt rise back in his throat. Adachi tilted his head for a moment before sighing, making a brushing movement with his hand. 

“Forget it, I’m over it now. Whatever the hell you have going on is way funnier than that. So are these small changes?” Adachi kept the questions up without hesitation. 

“Most of the time. There was a case recently with a-” Maruki quickly caught himself. Adachi tilted his head down to look at Maruki directly, also catching him about to drop too many details. It’s like he has experience with this. “A client. They had such immense pain, but it was a major change to her- Their, life. I was tired for a full day after that one, but… I’ve done nothing close since. Everyone here had minor changes that needed to happen.” Maruki was honest. 

“Your Persona’s a mess. When do you get a break from your other job?” Adachi hummed, bringing one arm to rest over the knee of his leg. Maruki smiled awkwardly as he struggled to remember. He held his hand up as a signal to pause while he grabbed his phone, searching for his calendar. 

“Here it is. The 24th of this month is summer break for the kids, so that means that’s time off for me too.” Maruki nodded along, setting his phone down so that it wouldn’t distract him during his conversation with Adachi. 

“Tell you what. During that break, how about we work on your Persona? I won’t promise anything, but…” Adachi turned his head toward the book in his lap. “It’s probably the first time in a while I’ve run into someone outside of that town with a Persona. It’s a breath of fresh air.” He opened the book again, searching through the pages. Oh, he forgot to mark the page. Maruki smiled, feeling a kind of warmth in his chest as Adachi said that. 

“I’d really like that. We’d have a full four weeks of that, and I feel like it would definitely help my research.” Maruki almost jumped when he heard the knock on the door. He looked up to the time, surprised that it went by so fast with so much to unpack. Adachi sighed, folding the corner of the page he thought he was up to and setting it back on the desk carefully. Oh, he didn’t get to read too much today…

“Sorry about that, Adachi.” Maruki stood up, putting his phone in his pocket as he got his things together to put back into his bag. Adachi shook his head and stood up as well, stretching his legs. 

“Quit apologising, you have nothing to apologise about. I’ll see you next week, Doc.” Adachi said it all very quickly, like he didn’t want Maruki to hear much of what he was saying - unfortunately for him, Maruki could hear better than he could see. 

“Goodbye, Adachi.” Maruki smiled, letting Warden Maeda in to run through her formalities again. She always does this. I wonder if she ever gets tired? She’s really passionate about this, though. None of what she’s saying to me right now is necessary for her to do, but every time she takes a client from my room she runs through the rules and regulations again. Maruki stayed put while Adachi was taken away, and walked home when Maeda came back to pick him up. 

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 2nd 20XX

Adachi seemed a bit down when he came in today. Any word I tried to have with him, even complimenting him seemed to result in a defensive attitude. 

I changed my approach to focus on the problem I was having earlier with my ability not working - something that Adachi noticed straight away and explained to me. He said that my ability is part of a ‘Persona’, which is ‘like a puppet’ of sorts that can ‘be controlled’. That wording feels strange to me, being that my ‘Persona’ very much feels like its own being, coming and going how it pleases.

But he did make another important point - Personas can be seen in the shadows of people cast on the floor. I saw my own, struggling to form but it definitely looked similar to what I’ve been seeing out of the corner of my eyes. I need to know more, and I want to know more.

Adachi promised to take me through a crash course of sorts during the Summer Break, which IS ON THE 24TH DO NOT FORGET. IT ENDS ON THE 31ST OF AUGUST. 

That means I have 

4 days? 

No, 5. I’ll take a lot of notes, I hope.

Chapter Text

Maruki stood, holding onto the upper rail of the train while he swayed to-and-fro between every stop. He scrolled through the news, passing the weather and traffic reports to other kinds of stories, but all he could find were ones about ‘Shibuya’s Underbelly’ and ‘ The Man They Call Gluttonous’ . They’re really getting more creative with names lately… He paused when he saw a photo of another Phantom Thieves card. From there curiosity held onto him, even as he began his walk to work. 

The Creed of Greed: Man Who Hands Himself in Baffles Police

The backside of Shibuya remains in the police’s sights as Junya Kaneshiro, leader of the Tokyo branch and belonging to one of the largest mafias plaguing the Kantō region. Police remain baffled as to why and under what pressure Kaneshiro was under to confess to his crimes - but it’s also public knowledge that Phantom Thief calling cards were found all throughout the streets of Shibuya. 

Scams were scrawled on the scene of Tokyo as year after year the police failed to take action against Kaneshiro’s actions - these involved “forcing children to transport drugs through envelopes”, one anonymous teenager said. They go on to state “Once he had evidence that you did it [...] he would take photos and threaten [my friend]. It was [...] horrible to watch. After that he would drink your bank account and your assets dry like a [villain].” Some people believe that it was due to the Phantom Thieves’ action that Kaneshiro ceased his crimes and changed his ways.

Speculation of the public leads to two different opinions of what happened, parting the crowd into ‘The Phantom Thieves stole his heart’ and, one that Goro Akechi seems to find himself speaking publicly in, ‘The Phantom Thieves coerced him illegally to confess’. Whether or not the Phantom Thieves seem to be causing crimes remains to be debated by the police and the public, but you can find our own debate on the TV Special: The Creed of Greed.

That was pretty short. It seems like they’re trying to pull attention to the TV special - that makes sense, of course. Maruki had come to a stop beside the door to the facility, pausing only briefly to pass his first security check and paused entirely before his second. Something’s jumping out to me, what is it specifically? Maruki read over it again. The Phantom Thieves… Something clicked. I wasn’t entirely sure at first, but there’s no mistake now. Someone so drastically changing their ways that even police are confused? Are those kids…  

He put his phone away and, as much as he wanted to rush to sit and work, he dealt with the next security check. I saw them when I was first signing my contract with the school, as I was leaving. I saw that Amamiya, Takamaki and Sakamoto were involved… And his friend group seems to be expanding slowly. I can’t just assume that everyone he shakes hands with is a Phantom Thief, though. There was a new kind of focus, it felt like he was being driven by a motor. 

He almost ran down the hallway, shutting the door behind him as quickly as he could before he felt like he could truly think and experience his emotions properly. They can enter that world. I knew they could, but I didn’t realise they were the Phantom Thieves until now. That’s amazing… But I can’t just say ‘I know’ to Amamiya. He might take that the wrong way. He held a hand to his chest, thinking about the new possibility. Would my ability work on them?.. Adachi is a unique case, but if his condition applies to the Phantom Thieves and other people who can actively enter cognitive worlds, then I should look into this more thoroughly. He could barely hear the knock on the door over his own thoughts, which rushed one after another. Shoot, I wanted to write this down… Maruki smiled warmly, accepting his first visitor of the day. 

He hadn’t been able to slow down much, but he did calm himself after speaking with his clients. Maruki happily worked on his research paper until the next knock rang around the room. His hands balled up for a moment, a two-second debate between shutting his screen or leaving it open - it led him to shut it. I’d like to speak to him properly. I think he’d be interested to know my thoughts. Maruki beamed as Adachi stepped through. Oh, the books. Maruki’s hand reached for his bag straight away, finding the two books he bought and set them on Adachi’s side of the table as his collaborator sat down. 

“You seem pretty happy today, Doc. Did you have a madman’s revelation or something?” Adachi smiled, though he was slowly shaking off his friendly persona. Maruki held his hands together, unable to keep quiet now that Adachi had asked. 

“I did, I saw something in the news today that really helped.” Let me tell you! Maruki barely gave that sentence a pause before he continued on. 

“Do you know what the Phantom Thieves are? It might be hard, since you’re in prison, but they play the news, don’t they?” Maruki thought briefly about pulling up the article on his computer, but he wasn’t sure that Adachi would want to see that. He shook his head slightly as he denied that thought. 

“I think so. Isn’t that what they’ve been harping on about all day? It’s only after lunch time and I think I’ve heard it on the TV four times.” Adachi let his arms rest on the chair as he answered. Oh, that’s good, you might know something that I don’t. I didn’t have time to watch it today. Maruki looked at the table briefly as he collected his thoughts, returning his gaze to Adachi when he was done. 

“I guess so, I knew they had a TV special but I didn’t have enough time to see it. I was pretty lucky that they released an article - They might have skipped over some details, but there was something important that I just caught onto.” Maruki smiled warmly again, feeling light as he continued on. 

“They said that the Phantom Thieves changed that man’s heart. That’s almost entirely my own research - if ‘changing hearts’ is what I think it is.” Maruki’s mind slowed as he saw Adachi’s reaction, seeing what was like a layer of ice forming over his face. What’s wrong? Maruki squeezed his hands together, searching through his own words but he couldn’t find what he might have said wrong. 

“Right. So you got that down, that’s great for you, Doc.” Adachi smiled with a shrug. No, no. That’s not your real reaction, is it? Maruki felt his happiness sink for a moment. He’s not even trying to insult me now. Why? He switched what position his hands were in before squeezing them again. Wait, everything makes sense now. It sounds like I’m trying to replace him.

“It is, isn’t it? But no one can teach me about Personas like you can.” Did I make it too obvious? There was a sense of panic taking over his words now, but he did his best to hold himself together. Adachi kicked one leg over the other with a sigh, his expression becoming dull. Yes, I made that too apparent. 

“Doc, you’re about as subtle as a brick through a window. May the people you try and trick have mercy, ‘cause even I’m feeling bad for you.” Adachi shook his head, sighing as his expression relaxed. His leg gently kicked, and his eyes wandered over to the books. You might be right, but if it helps you feel at ease, is that so bad?

“So you figured out something. What is it?” Adachi folded his arms and looked back at Maruki. Huh? I thought you would have picked up the book by now. Maruki smiled a little, apologetically as he continued on. 

“I might know a Phantom Thief. I have a few reasons to suspect him - Them...” Maruki paused before he sighed. “I’ve been speaking to him a lot. And, well - I saw him go into that other world.” He was at least able to speak calmly now. Adachi tilted his head slightly, keeping quiet as a cue for Maruki to speak more. 

“I was touring the school and signing my contract the day I saw it. I was walking out, down the stairs when I saw these- People, of an unspecified number-” Maruki was even less tactful there but at least he didn’t spill any details that he shouldn’t have. “Appear out of nowhere.” He smiled, happy that he did a good job. Adachi shook his head.

“I’m going to pretend that you didn’t just imply that it was a group of kids at your school. Why am I feeling Déjà vu?” Adachi let his arms relax on the chair again. Maruki deflated, realising that ‘people appearing in front of a school’ was not indirect enough. 

“You’ve also seen kids pop out of nowhere at a school?” Maruki wasn’t paying attention to what he was saying. Adachi stared at him blankly. 

“Just focus on your thoughts, Doc.” Adachi brushed that comment off. I should get to the point, you’re right. Maruki smiled and let his hands rest on the table. 

“I know them. I see one of them frequently. If it’s true that they’re entering the cognitive world to ‘change hearts’, it means that my theory is being put into practice - praxis. If I can get some kind of information from them in that regard, maybe I could even enter the cognitive world that they’ve been entering this whole time. That would be amazing, and a first in the cognitive psience field. Even so, that won’t teach me how to use my ability - as much of an invaluable experience that would be.” Maruki smiled warmly at Adachi, who looked at the books again. What are you thinking, Adachi? I wish I knew. There was a moment of silence before Adachi responded. 

“That’s true, I guess. Getting a Persona is like being thrown into the deep end a lot of the time, but I guess I had a tiny bit of guidance. I had the most annoying voice in my head for the longest time when I first walked into that world.” Adachi looked back up to Maruki, folding his arms again. Oh, really?

“A voice? Oh, you explained this earlier. You said something like a god allowed you access, right?” Maruki paused to think about it. A god. Adachi seems to have been in contact with a being like that. But a Persona isn’t a god, right? Or can they be? His brows furrowed as he tried to answer his own questions. 

“Yeah, a shard of one. All it really did was encourage me, but its voice was like a new level of hell. Eventually I stopped hearing it and seeing it, but I think that was just a sign that…” Adachi trailed off, a look of annoyance crossed his face briefly. 

“Y’know what, I don’t want to think about that. I’ll keep it to a few words - being possessed isn’t fun. All I have from that time are these images and what I felt.” Adachi sighed, kicking his leg harder as he spoke. He’s doing his best to answer me, though. I really appreciate it. Maruki nodded, smiling warmly again. 

“That’s okay. Losing control of your own body like that is uncomfortable beyond words, I could understand not wanting to think about something like that… Maybe if there’s something else you’d like to talk about? It doesn’t have to be about the TV world, or Personas. You’re already helping me a lot.” Maruki watched as Adachi finally reached out for the book. That’s understandable. Adachi found the page that he was on and pressed against the corner in an attempt to fix the fold that he made. 

“Yeah… I don’t know.” Adachi’s eyes began to move across the page. I think he’s done for now. Maruki nodded again and opened his laptop screen to work. However, as he finished the part that he was working on before, he realised Adachi wasn’t turning the page. Adachi? He wasn’t sure how to look at Adachi without drawing attention, so he could only peek over the laptop screen. He’s really not turning the page. His eyes are still now. Maruki thought about it for a moment before he spoke up. 

“The other day, I was trying out a baking recipe. That’s significant mainly because I don’t usually bake - it’s just a skill that I don’t have right now.” Maruki smiled a little, keeping his eyes on the screen now. Hopefully this might help him think of something else to talk about - it’s surely difficult, being that he’s in prison.

“It turned out that I added too much baking soda - it came out almost right, but as soon as I tasted what I made, I knew something was off straight away. It was a shame to have to throw out that cake, but it was really… Really, bitter.” Maruki looked over to Adachi when he was done talking. Adachi had slightly turned his head, but his eyes remained on the page for the time being. 

“So, you cook regularly?” Adachi didn’t look over, though it seemed like he wanted to. Maybe he thinks that I’m still looking at my laptop screen. I’m not sure what exactly he’s doing. Maruki tilted the laptop screen down, wondering if that would change anything. 

“I like to. I find it fun, though that doesn’t really suit my role as a researcher. To have a hobby like that.” Maruki watched as Adachi finally looked over. I thought saying something like that might make it easier for you. Adachi shook his head with a flat look. 

“Oh wow , how dare a human being do something outside of his own work. If you actually think that, you’re dumber than I thought you were.” Adachi let his hands fold over his knee to rest. Maruki laughed a little and shook his head.

“It’s a good thing that I don’t really think that way, then. Oh, but if you were interested, I could try and bring something for lunch next time - I’m not sure how else I could pay you for your help.” Adachi squinted as he heard that. Is there something else you’d prefer? Why are you looking at me like that?

“Money exists in prison, Doc. You could pay me. With money.” Adachi watched Maruki closer, letting his eyes relax. Oh, I don’t think… Maruki smiled awkwardly, looking over to his bag. Could I?  

“I’m just joking, honestly - if I had a camera I’d take a photo every time you pull that face.” Adachi laughed as Maruki sat back up, surprised. Oh, he wasn’t being serious. He paused for a moment. How many photos would that amount to now, since the first time we met? Maruki smiled and shook his head.

“Then stop it, I’ll have a heart attack before I reach my forties. Do you know how embarrassing that would be?” Maruki felt a kind of warmth in his chest. It’s nice to see him relax after a moment like we had before. 

“Yeah, that would be embarrassing. Man, how much time in solitary confinement would that get me?” Adachi laughed a little, but the warmth from Maruki’s chest faded quickly after that. Solitary confinement? Do they put people in there a lot? Maruki held his hands together again, wanting to ask but not wanting to make Adachi uncomfortable again. 

“Oh, calm down. Your face speaks more than you do.” Adachi sighed, letting his thoughts go. I don’t want you to get locked away like that. 

“Have they put you in solitary confinement before?” Maruki couldn’t stop the question from coming out. Adachi’s mouth curled downward awkwardly. I’m sorry, that’s an uncomfortable question.

“For a bit. I don’t care about it now, it’s too much energy to bother with.” Adachi stared Maruki down, a darker expression taking over. He doesn’t want me to say anything. I know, it might just make matters worse for you.

“Alright, well… Just let me know if I can help you in some way. A deal should be equal in value to both sides.” Maruki tried to use that logic to convince Adachi to rely on him. Adachi shook his head. 

“I agree with you, so why don’t you worry about your own value and I’ll worry about what value I’m getting out of this on my own? Mind your own plate before you touch mine.” Adachi spoke coldly. Oh, is that how you see this? Maruki flattened a little, thinking about those words. He held his hands together and squeezed them in his lap. I didn’t mean to upset you. It was quiet for a while after that. Adachi looked back at his book, shaking his head again while he sighed and flipped the page over. 

The clock hands scratched the time into a sound. Plastic and old, it likely needed oil and new batteries. Maruki looked up to it and confirmed what the time was. He’s got a lot of pain in his heart. I still can’t figure out how to help, or what to do with him. It’s unfortunate that he has such a good memory as well, every time he speaks about that other world he talks like it happened just recently, even if it’s been years. I want to help you… But how? Maruki looked back over to Adachi, who folded the page that he was on. I think he saw the time too.

“Hey. I’m still going to bring lunch, if you don’t mind. Are you allergic to anything?” Maruki smiled a little, weakly. I want to help you, it’s painful to watch you suffer. To watch people around you suffer. The prison staff don’t even realise what they’re doing to you, the system doesn’t acknowledge that punishments like solitary confinement only make matters worse. That’s psychological torture.

“No.” Adachi stood up, leaving the book on the table. No to what? Maruki went blank as he tried to figure out if Adachi was trying to dismiss his offer for lunch or if he was trying to say that he wasn’t allergic to anything. 

“ I’m not allergic to anything. ” Adachi slowed down his words, though there was a kind of strain behind it. He can’t even look me in the eyes. Maruki tried not to show his dejectedness on his face.

“That’s good, then. I’ll try to work something out.” Maruki squeezed his hands. Adachi sighed, a brief look of pain stopping him in his tracks before he fully turned around. 

“Thanks, Doc. I’ll see you next week, then.” His cheerful voice was back, and he held up his hand to wave, though it stayed still and faced away from Maruki. He knocked on the door and left him to Warden Maeda, who stayed quiet for a moment as she saw the expressions in the room. She performed her dutiful explanation and brought Adachi back through the hallways. Why do you distance yourself like this? As soon as it feels like we’re friends again, you realise that and try to snuff out that light. Maruki looked through the door, which had been left slightly open. Is it more painful for you to have friends?  

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 9th 20XX

Adachi and I spoke about the Phantom Thieves today. I’ve come to believe that I know one of the members personally. 

Adachi mentioned that he had been possessed by a ‘god’ in the past. He also said that gaining a Persona is like ‘being thrown into the deep end’. 

I promised to make some lunch and bring it in. I’m not sure what I’m going to do, but it feels very much like taking two steps forward and two steps backward with him. 

He struggles to let people in. He told me that he had been put in solitary confinement before and I didn’t pick my words carefully enough.

Chapter Text

Maruki stood at his kitchen, his determination fading as his mind waded through the slew of ideas that fought for his attention. Would he prefer something practical or something with an aesthetic? He rubbed his cheek as he leaned down to stare into his fridge. I’m not good with cute lunches. Trust me, I’ve tried that road before. He smiled awkwardly, remembering the time he spent during the night, similar to how he was now preparing lunches to give to Rumi before he got to his classes. That road… He curled down further, leaning onto the fridge door as his memories took over control for a little bit. 

This is all for her, really. For people in her situation that need help, but don’t have anyone to rely on. How can I really be so lazy with my work? It’s already July, nearly August and I’ve barely made any progress. The pain took hold of his face. It was only then that he realised how his shadow was squirming on the floor. Oh, it’s you.  

He paused, observing it quietly. What do you mean for me? He sighed, his hand hesitating for a moment before he reached out to the ground. It was weird, wanting to pat the ground, a silhouette of a creature with an intellect similar or higher than a human’s - but it seemed like it was struggling to do something. It’s okay. There’s no rush to things like that. But I can’t give you that kind of advice until I accept it myself. The shadow slowed to a stop, then reformed into the shape of his own body. You seem to be doing that more often lately. Maybe it’s because I’ve been noticing it more lately. Why do you always seem to be trying to comfort me?

The fridge began to beep, so he stood up and moved back to the counter where he could think a little clearer. Well, it has to be something with variety. It’s no good if I only put two or so things into it, and he turns out not to like anything in there… Maruki hummed quietly. I wish he would have told me what he liked. He seemed so… Maruki tried to find the word for it. It wasn’t overly sad, and it wasn’t overly cold. He just seemed like he was in a lot of pain from his Heart. He frowned as he thought about it. I wonder if everyone has a cognitive world and they aren’t aware of it? Of course, collective and individual consciousness aside… If I could learn how the Phantom Thieves were changing hearts, I might be able to help or adopt that method to help others.  

He stared back at the fridge, sighing quietly. He might already get lunch by the time that I see him. Maybe it should be more snack stuff rather than a full on lunch? He went through his cupboards trying to find his bento box. It’s been a little while since I’ve brought food with me to work. He checked over the container before he decided to give it a wash. It would be horrible if there was any dust, given that it was sitting in there for… How long now? He tried not to think about it too deeply, so when the solemn feeling made its attempt to grab his mood he shifted it to the task at hand. I think I should cut them into shapes. I’ve just been keeping that fruit around for when I get home, so it’s good to use it for something like this.  

A tiredness crept into his eyes. When the lunchbox was fully cleaned and dried, Maruki dried his own hands in a tea towel and took his glasses off, leaving them on the counter. I think I’m getting a headache from these glasses. He laughed a little to himself, weakly. I need a new prescription. Or maybe I should stop wearing them all the time. I’d forget that they were on my face if they didn’t fall off every time I laid my head down for bed. He went back to his fridge and took out some of the fruit that he had, though the pineapple he had was already dealt with. Cute little shapes… He relaxed a little as he started cutting the fruit into different kinds of shapes.

Oh, what if I did the bunny thing with the apples? He lit up when he realised the possibilities. It’s been a while. He got to work, starting with the apples as his point of interest and then moving on to the pineapple, which he’d made eye contact with an uncomfortable amount of times. I need to work out something with this… He did his best. Then came the watermelon and then he was back on track, off in a moment of happiness as he chipped away the fruit and ate the scraps. When he had enough to fill the bento box he spent the rest of his time in the kitchen cutting up the rest of the watermelon into storable pieces, then he set them into a plastic container and put it back in the fridge. He threw out the scraps he couldn’t eat and beamed at the skewers he made. And you don’t even need cutlery to keep your hands clean. It might be a bit light but I’m sure Adachi will appreciate it.

Then there was that familiar knock at the door. Maruki snapped out of his focus, though it took a moment when he closed his laptop to break out of it. Adachi stepped into the room, taking a moment to sit down before he spoke up. 

“Hey, Doc. How’s it going?” He seems a bit better today. I wonder what he was upset about last week? Did he ever tell me? Maruki caught on like he’d never left. In a way, it felt like the memories he had in this room were becoming more and more detached from time and reality, considering how oppressive the prison was with its lighting and view to nature. It makes me a little more grateful that I’ve been tracking my notes by the date… But I forgot the month. I should be able to work out which month is which, but…  

“Oh, I’m doing okay. Are you feeling better?” Maruki smiled a little, though he was still going through images of the previous session in his mind. Oh, the snacks! His eyes widened for a moment before he leaned down into his bag. He sat back up straight with his bento box as he watched the end process of Adachi kicking one leg over the other. 

“Wait, you actually…” Adachi seemed to go through the seven stages of grief before he let out a sigh, letting his arms rest on the chair. Sorry, what’s the problem now? Maruki went blank as he tried to figure out what Adachi was thinking. Thankfully for him, Adachi was ready to speak his mind.

“You keep doing shit like this. I’m supposed to be your client , even worse, a prisoner with crimes under his belt. Your ‘counsellor’ situation aside - there is no benefit. There have been many people in my life who only spoke to me for benefit or situation - You don’t have to be nice to me to keep my compliance.” Adachi’s expression became duller the more he spoke. No, you’re distancing yourself again. Has this really been bothering you? Maruki frowned, reflecting on his actions. I don’t think it’s strange at all. He paused as he thought on the words that bounced around in his mind. I have been treating you like we’re friends. Does that make you uncomfortable?

“Do you think that we’re friends?” Maruki decided on that question to begin with. Adachi held his jaw tightly together, spending a while on that idea before he spoke. 

“How would you define friends? ” You’ve dodged the question, but that’s okay. Maruki relaxed as he smiled again. This must be salt in the wound for you. I’m sorry, Adachi. I wish there was an easier path for you… If my ability could just work, you would be so much happier. It was a smile with a sad aftertaste.

“People who share enough time together, who want to share time together. I mean - I thought you would just resign from the program if you didn’t want to be around me. I’m sorry if my assumption hurt you, I should have probably talked about that idea first, huh?” Maruki squeezed the bento box. It wasn’t like he could set it onto the table now, he knew Adachi didn’t want it. Maybe I should have really asked about it. He was just answering questions. Adachi brought a hand up to rub his face, pressing pale spots into his skin.

“Do you realise that you didn’t even let me answer that question? Do you like hearing yourself talk or something?” Adachi seemed frustrated, his leg started to kick a little faster and it was like he didn’t know what to do with his hands anymore. Oh, I spoke over you. Maruki’s smile became awkward and apologetic. It’s just getting worse. Maybe I should put the bento box away?

He didn’t get much of a chance to decide on an answer when Adachi stood up. Oh, are you leaving for today? Maruki sat stunned for a moment but when Adachi walked over to his side of the table his heart almost jumped out of his throat. Wait, wait, wait! Maruki did his best to sit still, not wanting to throw off his earlier sentiment of being friends - though considering the other time that Adachi had crossed over to his side of the room like this, it was to grab his face. Adachi took the box and pulled it out from Maruki, though his hands were stuck - mainly because he was squeezing the bento box like it was going to protect him.

“Let go. Unless you were going to be selfish, not sharing with the rest of the class?” Adachi smiled, though it was shaky, like he was trying to force those words out. Like a half-formed mask. Huh? Maruki slowly let go of the box, feeling the creaking in his fingers from holding them so tightly against a plastic object. Adachi shook the box a little to hear what was inside before he looked at his chair for a moment. 

“This desk is huge, huh? Lemme break the rules for a second.” Adachi set the box down and grabbed his chair, wheeling it over to the side of the desk where he wouldn’t necessarily be on Maruki’s side, but close enough that he could easily reach the box if it was left in Maruki’s range as well. Maruki could only observe, his heart slowing to a normal rhythm before rising again. He thinks we’re friends! He couldn’t actually answer the question, that’s what that look was for! He beamed, causing Adachi to turn his head from him.

“Gross, Doc. You’re a grown man looking like an eighties-style anime girl.” Adachi looked back at the box and opened it, freezing when he saw the star-shaped fruits inside. Oh, that’s right. I did that last night, I completely forgot what it actually looked like. Maruki laughed, seeing Adachi’s expression go from his own form of embarrassment to what he could only describe as ‘photos taken during ghost sightings’. 

“I’m sorry for laughing, it’s just your expression. It wasn’t too much effort so if that’s what you're worried about…” Maruki took up one of the skewers, fixing the rotation of one of the fruit pieces before he took a chunk from the top to eat. The stars are supposed to be rotated like this. The fruit on the inside sits in the opposite way so that it’s not just a flat piece. Adachi took up one of the other skewers and stared at it for what felt like a year. Adachi? Maruki tried not to show too much concern in his face under the assumption that Adachi might point that out instead of eating his half of the box.

“Yeah… I’m not worried.” Adachi hesitated for a little while longer before he took a piece off of the skewer to eat. That sounded kind of like he was upset… Maruki let his idle hand rest over his knee while he spoke. 

“Are you okay? I mean, I know I probably should have asked more about this before I did it. If it’s anything you don’t like, you don’t have to eat it.” Maruki watched as Adachi shook his head and remained quiet for a little while longer. 

“It’s so stupid.” Adachi made an attempt to dismiss his answer. Oh no you don’t. Unless you’re really uncomfortable - but I don’t really get that from your actions. Adachi kicked one leg over the other, looking over to Maruki for a moment before sighing. 

“You’ve got no clue. I mean - I was transferred here from a prison pretty close to Inaba, I have to argue that the food here is better - but I haven’t seen fruit since I got arrested. It’s stupid to be…” Adachi sighed. Oh, I get it now. Maruki couldn’t help but to feel terrible for him. He almost forgot that he was a serial killer. It was a dangerous new habit. Even so… Is fruit that much more expensive? Maruki frowned, holding his hands together with a half-eaten fruit skewer between them. 

“I mean. They just never do lotus root right.” Adachi laughed a little, shrugging as he smiled. Maruki watched him quietly for a few moments before he looked at the table to think. Would it be unfair to bring Adachi lunch like this from now on? Every prisoner gets the same thing… He looked at his own skewer next. Wouldn’t it be better that prisoners were in charge of their own food? Oh, but I guess that would cost a lot to change around… And I’ve already brought Adachi some fruit like this… Maruki took a bite of the next chunk of fruit on the skewer. I think everyone else is pretty content now, right? I don’t recall anyone else having a higher sentence than Adachi either. Plus, he’s going to help me through my Persona troubles… Isn’t this the least I could give in return?

“I wish they would invest more into the food here. I’m honestly really disappointed with them… I mean - I don’t think lotus root is even hard to cook.” Maruki shook his head. Adachi laughed a little with a shrug. 

“You’re really showing them up here, and you didn’t have to cook any of this either. How long did this take you to do?” Adachi kept his defence up for that moment. I want you to be comfortable, so do what you need to until you feel better.

“Really not that long. I think the longest part was trying to figure out what I was going to do, then the fruits took… Maybe half an hour? I did cut them by hand, maybe I should have gotten those shape stamps instead that can cut it out for you.” Maruki hummed, thinking about it. But that would be some money to spend… The books are the only expense that I’m really ignoring right now. I’ve been saving up for a bed frame.

“Huh. Ever considered being a kitchen hand if the researcher thing falls through?” Adachi joked, kicking one leg over the other again. There you go. Maruki laughed a little and shook his head again. 

“No, that sounds like a lot of standing in one place. I can sit in one place for a while, but I think if I was stuck in a kitchen for hours I would probably find a way to break out through the bathroom window.” Maruki played around with the thought in kind, exaggerating just a bit. Adachi smiled and shook his head as well. 

“That’s a quick way to get fired and blacklisted from the industry. You don’t really strike me as a hyperactive person, though. Someone who can sit in one place for a long time, but as soon as he’s told to do the same thing but standing he wants to die instead? At least some people complain of back and feet issues, what’s wrong with you?” Adachi hummed, finishing his skewer and going for another. He set the stick to one side inside the box, away from the fruit. 

“I don’t know, really. It feels like I should do something if I’m on my feet. Maybe it’s the difference between ‘work mode’ and ‘rest mode’ for me. I walked around a lot in university as well, especially in university.” Maruki’s expression grew flat as he remembered the long walks he would do in the middle of the night, trailing back home after library visits almost turned into sleepovers. I didn’t want to use money on the public transport system. I think it was a way of getting my energy out, but… He had some vague memories of waking up in alleyways and park benches with police officers shaking him. I’d rather not do that again. I was so stubborn back then.

“You make it sound like you were too poor to afford the train fare.” Adachi paused when he saw Maruki’s reaction. Maruki turned his head away slowly, smiling awkwardly. I don’t think he even meant to do that. A detective’s intuition sure is scary.

“Wait, so how did you get through university? I thought you would be the kind of kid parents would love, I can just imagine a grandma hanging off of your cheek with her fingers.” Adachi’s brows furrowed. Well…

“I worked some vacation jobs and hoped for the best when the semester picked back up. My friend’s parents were really nice to me.” Maruki looked back, though he was now worried that Adachi was judging him somehow. 

“Huh. You didn’t get any scholarships? I thought those were really easy to get.” Adachi tilted his head slightly, becoming more comfortable as the conversation drifted away from his own feelings. I feel like I get you a little more now, in that regard. You have to learn that it’s okay to feel sentimental over things - even if it seems small to you.

“No, not in the beginning. As I started my graduate degree my average score rose high enough that I started getting some assistance, and then I got some research funding when I did my thesis during my doctorate.” Maruki counted his tertiary path on his fingers to keep a track. Adachi looked at his fruit skewer again for a few moments.

“You really make it sound like you only studied one course. You spent ten years of your life on that crap?” Adachi looked over to Maruki flatly. Maruki frowned, tilting his head slightly. 

“I don’t regret it. Especially after…” Maruki froze. Oh, is that okay? Should I talk about something like that? He looked at Adachi, who was looking him up and down. He’s already worked out that I was about to say something I shouldn’t. Maruki looked at his lap and sighed. No, I don’t think now is a good time.

“I really enjoy my field. Nothing I did or continue to do now is a waste.” Maruki relaxed, wanting to fix his attitude before it made Adachi question him. I don’t think talking about my ex fiancée is going to be good for conversation.  

“Right. Whatever you say.” Adachi finished his second skewer. Oh, I haven’t even finished one. I’ve been talking a lot. Maruki ripped the last piece of fruit on the skewer off and set it into the pile with the other sticks. 

“Though… You were speaking as though scholarships are easy to get.” Maruki looked over to Adachi properly. Adachi’s brows furrowed as he shrugged again, holding out his hands the best that he could with a fruit skewer being held in them. 

“Yeah? You just apply, and when they ask you why you’re applying, you just go ‘it would super help my studies! Like, if you could pay me, I could continue going to the academy! I’ll show you amazing results, so keep your eyes on me, okay?’ - some shit like that, but imagine that it’s in a formal format and none of those words, but the same message.” Adachi laughed a little, letting it get louder when he saw the shock and horror on Maruki’s face. I think I aged twenty years. Why did you say it like that?

“I’ll remember that if I go through university again…” Maruki smiled awkwardly. Adachi shook his head, setting his third stick down into the side of the box. He didn’t go for another. 

“Yeah, that’ll really work. All those old, rich folks are the same. It’s always old, rich folks who fund those scholarships, you know?” Adachi’s brows furrowed as he laughed a little more. Oh, Adachi. I’m not actually going to take your advice, but maybe you know that already.  

“What did you study, by the way? I mean, by your use of ‘academy’, I assume you went to a proper police academy?” Maruki’s smile relaxed, happy to see that Adachi seemed to be having fun. 

“Oh, everyone takes the same course with some electives - at least, that’s how it was for my school. That took me about a year and a half, ish?..” Adachi looked up, like he was trying to remember it clearer. “Then you go to a regional school after you’ve been a good little cop and you’ve gone up in the ranks a bit, you can become a detective.” Adachi shook his head.

“Okay, well I did go to a ‘real’ university first. I did criminal law, then I went to police school.” Adachi folded his arms, looking at his lap as he spoke. He looks  like he forgot about that part. That’s okay, I was assuming you went to college. Maruki smiled, happy to hear Adachi talk about it in as much detail as he did.

“That’s interesting, I really wouldn’t have known that. I mean, you see promotion of the police occasionally, but you don’t really see the education path at all. It sounds like you were moved around a lot.” Maruki looked over into the bento box, curious about what was left. I’m not really so hungry, but I think Adachi has accepted his half already. Knowing him… Maruki picked up a new skewer. He’ll take it as pity if I leave those behind.

“Yeah, well. I guess you don’t look like someone who would pick up a pamphlet…” Adachi looked back over to Maruki before he continued on. “I did move a bit, but with the scholarships it was easy to move around. All you have to do is show up to their events where they wave your cohort around like trophies in front of the old, rich people and then they all clap their hands and you get to leave. Oh, not before you hear a few sob stories, though.” Adachi hummed quietly, kicking his leg gently as he remembered. 

“You make it sound like that was easy, but ‘being waved around like a trophy’ doesn’t really sound like fun.” Maruki tilted his head slightly, inviting Adachi to talk more. 

“Oh no, it wasn’t.” Adachi said that flatly.

“But what was I going to do? If you think I’m a nightmare now then imagine how my parents thought about me. I was dead set on being an officer. Stupid idea, really. I was obsessed with guns, it’s funny seeing how many times I talked myself into a corner only to talk myself out of it. ‘Real’ police officers are all about dignity and honour, those guys really want to help the community. Kids with thoughts like mine dropped out when they realised that they were going to have to do more than sit in a box all day, but I was a stupid kid. Every day that I woke up, I’d look at my schedule to see if I had any gun training that day.” Adachi laughed a little, ending his words in a scolding way.

“Funny, that. It didn’t even pay well. Well, I hated cooking so I guess that’s where half of the pay went. I knew some basic stuff that would get me through the week, but…” Adachi shook his head, looking at the bento box. 

“It’s funny, Doc. You’re doing a girl’s job right now, you know that?” Maruki sat in shock. What? Where did that come from? All he could do was stare at Adachi, losing his mind in trying to figure out what kind of red lines Adachi used to get to that point. 

“I’m sorry?” Maruki wasn’t apologising, but he couldn’t figure out how to ask what Adachi meant without expending more energy than he was already using to try and connect the dots. Adachi laughed, furrowing his eyebrows as he watched Maruki implode. 

“You heard me. Are you trying to be my girlfriend ? Do you remember that you’re a guy?” Adachi leaned down slightly, unable to keep a good posture anymore from how much he was laughing over Maruki’s reaction - which only got worse. For one-

“That’s misogynistic…” Maruki blinked, trying to piece his thoughts together but his mouth moved faster than he could think. Two, “And insecure of you to say…” The next implication burnt his face and he wasn’t too sure how to take that. What’s this about a girlfriend? For three - “It just sounds like your parents didn’t teach you how to cook, and you never picked it up.” Maruki couldn’t explain his thoughts any other way. Adachi went quiet, his smile fading fairly quickly. It felt like another year passed before Maruki spoke up again.

“Oh, but - not to be rude.” Maruki smiled awkwardly. I was a bit late on that one. Adachi kicked his leg gently as he looked back at the bento box. He folded his arms and had a defeated look about him.

“Sure.” Adachi blinked a few times. I can’t tell if this is a good or a bad reaction. I was expecting him to turn around and insult me, but he’s just… Quiet. Sitting there, like he’s reflecting? Or deflecting, it’s really hard to tell. Maruki’s smile got worse, setting aside his finished skewer to grab the final one. He looked down at it and then offered it to Adachi. Please, stop being so quiet?

“Doc, keep your half to yourself. It’s probably warm by now.” Adachi squinted, looking at the skewer for a moment before the knock on the door that signified that their time was up came along, causing him to sit up straight. I didn’t realise how quickly that time would pass. Maruki wasn’t sure how someone would react, seeing that the usual formation of the chairs was broken. Adachi paused for a moment before standing up, leaving his chair behind. Wait, could you please-?  

Maruki realised what the more concerning part of the puzzle was and grabbed his bento box. He held his hands under the desk and smiled warmly when Warden Maeda came in. Adachi came back to a friendly persona, staring at the desk where Maruki’s hands would be and shaking his head with a smile. What does that mean? Maruki’s smile became shaky as he tried to figure out what Adachi was suggesting that he do. He set his skewer inside and dropped it, though that was as the door opened. He folded his hands over the table in an attempt to look comfortable. Adachi sighed, though that was only evident by how his chest grew and shrunk. 

“Is everything alright, boys?” Maeda looked around the room. Oh, you’re older than me? I had no clue, though I’ve never seen you without your hat on. Maruki didn’t take offence to that, but he could tell Adachi didn’t like that term at all in how he folded his arms when he heard it. I hope she doesn’t call you that often.  

“Yes, everything’s alright. What’s wrong?” Maruki held his hands together. Is it bad that I had Adachi sit next to me like that? He wasn’t sure. 

“You just look like you’ve seen a ghost, that’s all.” Maeda frowned a little. Oh. It was me, getting worked up over nothing. Maruki relaxed and smiled at her properly. 

“Oh, don’t worry. I probably just need some fresh air, I missed my break today.” Maruki waved his hand a little, dismissing her concern gently. Thank you for caring, though. You’ve really been nothing but nice to me. The other guards I’ve interacted with… He tried not to think about it too much. I don’t think they mean to be rude to me.

“Alright. Well - Everyone knows the rules.” Maeda straightened her back when she spoke as she went over the protocol like she usually did. I wonder if you ever get tired of this? I hope that you get breaks too, Maeda. Maruki let her leave, though he came to notice something. Adachi never speaks to her, or any of the guards from what I can tell. If I had to think about it from his perspective… Maybe he thinks it’s too much effort? Maruki hummed quietly as he tried to work that out. 

I mean, given how he treated me at the start, maybe the guards change over frequently and he thinks that there’s no real reason to interact with them outside of what’s necessary. Maruki rolled his chair back so that he could lean down and grab his bento box. It kind of makes me more relieved that he did decide to keep talking to me, even when he felt betrayed by my actions. I wonder what motivated him until now? He was talking about how my own actions ‘had no benefit for me’, so does he see some kind of benefit in talking with me? He went blank as he connected that dot pretty easily. 

Well, think about it. He really doesn’t get along with anyone else in the prison. The benefit might be entertainment, or connection. He looked at his bento box again and smiled a little. That’s okay with me. This all helps me with my research, but I also feel like we’re genuinely friends at this stage. Even if it might be a bit shallow to form a friendship over something like this… I hope we can continue talking to each other even when my research paper is completed.

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 16th 20XX

I brought Adachi some fruit skewers today, though the reception wasn’t necessarily positive at first. There wasn’t so much progress today, aside from paper developments in my spare time - I got to learn more about Adachi, though. 

He said that he went to university for (what I assume is) an undergraduate degree before going to an official police academy - I think that makes sense, given that he wanted to become a detective. And I didn’t realise that there were different levels of police academies? It goes to show how much I know. Of course, I didn’t think that everyone just showed up to one academy, but… 

I think I should bring lunch more often. I wish I could fix the problem for everyone, but that seems a bit more complicated than what I can handle right now. No one else has really made a complaint, so… I think sharing with Adachi is okay? (???) I mean, so long as the guards don’t find out. 

Regardless,

Chapter Text

Maruki set up his desk carefully, nervous and quiet. I’m not sure if Adachi will want to read today… He looked at the books, contemplating removing them for more space. I don’t know how physically intensive ‘Persona training’ is going to be, either. He looked over to his bento box. And I mean, I brought a water bottle just in case, but I thought a change of clothes might be too much. I mean - it’s suspicious that I would need to change clothes. He hummed quietly, smiling awkwardly at the thought. Though, there ARE over-prepared kinds of people, who have a change of clothes on them regardless in case anything happens to their current pair… He looked at his lap silently. Well, it’s too late now. I’ll just head home faster if I need to shower or something.  

He stared at his water bottle again, contemplating bringing it up to the table. I usually drink apple juice during these kinds of things, so this might be a good change. He went to reach for the bottle, but the knock came from the door - he sat up straight and smiled when Adachi walked in. Oh, good timing, I think. Adachi waited for the door to shut before he sat down, dropping his friendly act quite quickly today as he looked at Maruki. Well, you don’t seem upset yet. I wonder what you’re thinking about?

“Hey, Doc. I’ve been thinking this whole thing over,” Adachi began and Maruki’s heart dropped. What? ‘This whole thing’ as in ‘the program’? “I realised that trying to do this without a ‘cognitive environment’ is going to be difficult.” Adachi was direct. Oh. Maruki sighed in relief, smiling again as he held his hands together.

“That’s not too much trouble, is it? Don’t they have some effect in our world?” Maruki blinked a few times, curious. Adachi shook his head and brought his hands onto the desk. Oh, that’s probably the first time you’ve done that.

“Nope. Maybe it’s different, but I’ve never seen it. The most they can do is pop up in the shadows, or in your case, lobotomise people…” Adachi trailed off, smiling a little as he watched Maruki’s reaction flip to a look of defeat. Come on now, it’s not ‘lobotomising’. “Y’know, that’s interesting in itself. I’d be pretty happy if I could just snap my fingers and have people believe in anything I wanted them to.” Adachi hummed, sitting back in his chair. Maruki shook his head.

“It’s not ‘making people believe in what I want’. It’s more… Giving them new memories that heal their trauma.” Maruki relaxed as he came back to a point that he could actually explain. Adachi made a brushing movement with his hand as he looked over to the bento.

“Yeah, yeah. Tell me really quick, what’s the deal with lunch? Are we eating it now or shovelling it in later?” He tilted his head slightly. Maruki looked over to the bento box as well, finding joy in just the implication that Adachi was looking forward to it. 

“Actually, forget I asked.” Adachi sighed, though his tone made it out like he was joking. Maruki laughed a little and opened the lid, showing that what was inside was a kind of stir-fry dish with noodles, vegetables and some small pieces of beef. Even if it’s something I put together really quickly, Adachi seems really happy. It’s almost a little sad how the system can do something like that to someone… Maruki smiled warmly, even though his heart sank. To make them want something as simple as this. The more that I walk around here, the more I realise how… Even his thoughts hesitated, like he was about to pull the curtain to reveal the cause of the shadow being projected onto it. Terrifying the prison system is. 

“Here. I wasn’t sure if they were going to be suspicious that I was suddenly bringing lunch with me, so I hid the other pair of chopsticks.” Maruki sat the lid on the table, revealing that the chopsticks were clipped into place against the lid. Maruki went back into his bag to find another pair that he wrapped in a tea towel from home. I mean, I am protected - the crime that has been committed is being punished. It’s operating as intended, but… It doesn’t look too much into the future. Adachi’s brows furrowed together. 

“I mean, I wouldn’t really blink twice. Even if I had a reason to search you, don’t you think you’re making yourself more suspicious by hiding the other pair? I would have guessed drugs.” Adachi held his hand flat across his chest as he picked up a piece of the stir fry and brought it to his mouth to eat. Oh. Maruki’s shoulders flattened as he realised how much worse he made it look. Adachi seems like any person I could cross in the street. But being treated like he is - when twenty years, or fifteen now, is up… Will he just find a way to do it again because he’s been shown that the system no longer cares about him? Yes, I am protected, but I will still exist in fifteen years. I don’t feel threatened by Adachi anymore, of course - but I can’t guarantee that my abilities will ever work on him. He felt a bit of pressure once he realised that he might not be able to do that in time. 

“Doc, you’re looking serious. Jealous you didn’t get the first bite or something?” Maruki snapped out of his thoughts, looking back over to Adachi as he smiled again. Shoot, I need to stop doing that. Adachi sighed, kicking one leg over the other as he watched Maruki’s body language change again. 

“If you’ve got thoughts, spit them out. Isn’t that what I’m really here for, My confidant? ” Adachi teased, digging into the bento box for another piece. My confidant. Really? Maruki laughed a little at that thought. Someone you trust with secrets. I guess that’s what we are.

“If I confide in you, will you tell anyone else?” Maruki joked, shaking his head as he distanced himself from the thoughts he was having earlier. Let’s focus on why we’re actually here. I don’t think Adachi wants to hear about this.

“Does it look like I talk to anyone around here? Oh, maybe Yu will hear it.” Adachi joked, but it felt like a perfect stab into Maruki’s previous actions. Well, I see how it is. Maruki still felt guilty about that, but he laughed a little anyway - if Adachi was over it, he would come around to it too. 

“I was just thinking about the prison system.” Maruki lowered his voice, looking at the bento box again. Adachi’s smile dropped and he looked over to Maruki properly. Well. Let’s say our piece quickly and move on. It has been on my mind.

“I don’t like how they treat people. They don’t think about their futures at all… I’m trying to verbalise what I mean.” Maruki ran a hand through his hair as he tried to collect his thoughts into droplets of words. A small hum came out of Adachi’s mouth, but he didn’t say much else. 

“There’s no rehabilitation. I mean - It’s complicated. I don’t think the victims should have to forgive the people who stood against them, but… I want to see everyone get better. That’s all. I thought prisons would do that, now I see that they don’t.” Maruki smiled awkwardly, feeling his face burn up as he realised how this might sound to Adachi. It was hard to look anywhere else than the box on the table, worried that he might have somehow insulted the person he was working with. 

“Them’s the breaks.” Adachi shrugged. Huh? Maruki went blank for a few seconds before he looked at Adachi properly. He’s really not phased at all. He breathed a sigh of relief, taking hold of the tea towel he unravelled on the table with a plan to throw it in the bag.

“To be clear, I regret my actions. Not in an emotional way, oh no! How could I do that to another human being! Aw,” Adachi frowned momentarily, mocking that thought before returning to a neutral expression to keep talking. “But having shit taken from me and watching time pass me by, that’s what sucks. Seeing new things come out on TV, like the other year it was those smart watches, right?” Adachi rolled his wrist like he was checking the time, though his eyes didn’t move to see it. It was more of a gesture to clarify, as if it wasn’t clear enough. “It’s disorientating. Being kept like this.” Adachi shut his eyes with a sigh. It sounds like he was talking about something else. Maruki put two and two together. It’s a truth hidden within another - I can guess that he’s really talking about being separated from people when he talks about being ‘disorientated’. I guess I only added fuel to that… Maruki frowned. 

“Why don’t you apply for parole?” Maruki tilted his head slightly, but Adachi was pretty quick to respond - like he’d already thought about that a lot.

“Nope. Don’t want to. I’ve got my own reasons,” Adachi gently kicked his foot. “Are you going to eat? I do actually want to give you a chance with your shoddy Persona.” Adachi pushed the box over to Maruki using the end of his chopsticks, considering he couldn’t lean forward so well. The box was half empty, one side was clear. He made sure to split it evenly… Maruki took the box and smiled a little again, weakly. I don’t know why that stood out to me so much. He’s the one who doesn’t have much access to this standard of food, but he still wants to share it evenly. 

“Are you sure that you don’t want the rest? I don’t mind that you have everything that’s left - I can always get something on the way back, like I usually do. Or if I’m tight for money, I just make something else at home.” Maruki shook his head, holding the box back out for Adachi to take. 

“ Doc , I will find out where you live. Just eat the rest, stop treating everything like it’s some kind of kindness competition . I don’t need your shit.” Adachi loosely threatened him - it was more like being hit by a water gun than being actually hit by something substantial. Maruki laughed properly, only taken off guard by the fact that it felt so weakly said compared to the other insults that Adachi had come up with. 

“Mhm, I’m sure you will. It’s not like I have to publicly announce my address when I release my research paper, which I promised to give you.” Maruki shook his head, giving up on trying to get Adachi to have the rest. You win. He started clearing his side of the lunch box. 

“What? Seriously?” Adachi’s brows furrowed, confused by the thought. Maruki nodded, leading Adachi to comment more. “Isn’t that a bad idea? Ignore that we made that deal - if someone wants to kidnap you for more information, they can just go to your house. Is all research like that?” He held his hands out, splaying his fingers in an exaggeration of his question. 

“No, if you’re with an official publisher or research group, that location is used instead. Knowing which location a paper was published in is really important, since it influences what demographics your findings are based in. For instance, my research here in Japan might not work as well in another country and vice-versa. While it’s a little uncomfortable having my exact address shown, it’s not really that bad. I think.” Maruki went blank as he reflected on Adachi’s words. Someone could kidnap me for my research? But it’s being made public anyway? Wouldn’t it be more threatening if they made me do more research for ulterior motives?  

“You’ve got guts. It’s actually really strange, seeing you flip my interpretation of you that much.” Adachi hummed, bringing his leg down to stand up. He tucked his chair in and leaned on it, preparing for the next half of the session. Oh, I should hurry up. Maruki sheepishly dug the rest of the bento box into his mouth and set it down, putting both chopsticks inside and shutting the lid. He finished what he bit onto and tilted his head. 

“What do you mean?” Maruki moved his bag carefully so that he didn’t stand on it when he got up from his chair. Adachi held his hand up and curled his fingers down, keeping his pointer up. 

“For one, you went behind my back and networked with some people who knew me before I got sentenced. Two, you’re actively lying to police officers to do your research - and three, you’re willing to put your address on said research even knowing that you could wind up in trouble for lying about your position in this research. By the way, if you want something to be private, get better glasses that don’t reflect your screen - it was hard not to read those bits and pieces.” Adachi smiled as he watched Maruki’s dread build. Oh. Well, I don’t really open this document in public… Do I? He went blank. 

“Wait, you would have to read backwards. Are you sure you even got the right document?” Maruki wasn’t challenging him at all. It was a genuine question, one which Adachi answered with a shrug and a teasing smile. 

“Did I? Who knows.” Adachi stepped away from the table. Maruki copied the movement, wondering what Adachi was up to. He stayed quiet, waiting for Adachi to explain what was going on. 

“I’ve got a question for you. How do you usually use your ability?” Adachi put his hands in his pockets, seeming pretty relaxed even for a topic that no one else was supposed to know about. Maruki smiled awkwardly as now he felt like he was put on the spot. Oh, would he like me to try again? Let’s see… He wasn’t too sure about what to do with his hands so he just kept them by his side. 

“Um… I usually just think hard and it happens. Do you want me to try right now?” Maruki smiled awkwardly. That’s the worst explanation I could have come up with. Adachi sighed, shaking his head. 

“Sure, why not. Knock me out.” Are you genuinely asking me to do that? I guess convincing you that it’s night time might actually work, and it seems like it would be easy to undo if I needed to. Maruki tried to focus, but he realised that his shadow was beginning to form into the spirals of tentacles it usually showed itself as. Hello, there you are. Can we work together today, even if this fails? He held his arm out, wondering if a pose would help. The world became blurry before it split into two realities, much like every time before. Red and blue sat in the absence of light, curling around the ‘real shadow’ as Adachi stood, clear as day compared to the surroundings. Maruki’s eyes went wide as he realised he could still see him so clearly. Wow. That should have been my first hint - He’s so clear, like nothing is happening at all. The colours barely bleed onto him.  

Adachi looked around, bringing his arms up to fold them into a knot over his chest. Maruki’s Persona snaked its tentacles up toward Adachi’s foot, but it was met quickly by a bubbling shadow in opposition. It formed into a silhouette of a kind of man with a pointed head and a glaive, shaking. It was pretty hard to tell what was happening from just one-tone images on the floor, though. Maruki’s persona retracted and eventually dissolved, leaving his own shadow standing alone. So… If I understand this right… Maruki’s head flooded with different lines of thought. 

“So, I guess that explains my ‘immunity’.” Adachi smiled, almost with a sense of pride. Maruki frowned as his thoughts came to a single conclusion.

“Do you always have your guard up?” Maruki held his hands together. I actively have to think about using my persona. Every time that I tried using this ability, it never worked. If there has to be a conscious connection with your Persona as it was demonstrated, then… Adachi blinked a few times as his brows fell into a confused look. Give it a second to process, Adachi.

“I don’t get what you mean… Ugh, you know how to shoot us both in the foot.” Adachi sighed, waving his hand over his shadow. It dispersed, like it was on command. He’s definitely more practised in this stuff than I am. If it wasn’t evident before, it sure is now.

“But, wait a moment. I’ve noticed that it appears out of the corner of my eye sometimes… Is that normal?” Maruki brushed Adachi’s comment off, his curiosity building at this point. Adachi tilted his head and shut his eyes, as if he was trying to remember something. 

“Nope. When was the last time you took your meds, by the way?” Adachi looked back at Maruki, who flattened at that response. Come on now. I guess our topic is pretty unconventional, but there’s no need to react like that. If it’s going to be that way… Maruki hummed, taking a few steps closer. Adachi tilted his head the other way, only slightly confused. When Maruki got too close for comfort he leaned his head back. Maruki took a hold of Adachi’s shoulder and gave it a gentle press before smiling again. 

“Seems like I don’t need any right now.” Maruki threw the joke back at him. I never noticed it before but - you’re shorter than me. I thought that you were taller than me all this time, but nope. Just by… About an inch? Adachi took Maruki’s hand and pulled it off of him, sighing. 

“You’re real funny, Doc. A therapist should know that’s not how it works.” Adachi didn’t step back like Maruki thought he would, though. I mean, it makes sense. I’m not really intimidating, and I’m not really in his personal space, am I? I thought he would find that funnier considering his sense of entertainment. 

“You’re right. But it can be useful to know what’s real and what isn’t. I think a service animal would be more useful.” Maruki took a step back, letting Adachi stand properly again. 

“You’re going off topic... Why don’t you just try and hold your Persona for a long time?” Adachi sighed again, sticking his hands back in his pockets. From this distance? Maruki took two more steps back, but on the last shuffle the familiar sound of a knock came from the door. Maruki frowned, realising how much time he might have used this time just talking. Adachi shrugged, bringing a hand up to rub his shoulder as he turned to the entrance. 

“Oh well. I don’t suggest trying it at home.” Adachi shook his head. But why? Maruki found a spot at the desk quickly, remembering how the warden caught on last time. He couldn’t really ask, since shortly after the door opened and Warden Maeda took a step inside. She ran through her formalities again, and Adachi was whisked around the corner. Maruki sat at the desk, letting his smile drop. Why shouldn’t I try it at home? If Personas generally have no effect on the real world… He was left with that question, confused.

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 23rd 20XX

We began ‘Persona training’ today. Despite that commencement, I

wasted time by talking and eating.

Despite this, some facts have become clearer to me. 

For one, Adachi’s immunity stems from his Persona - I could describe it as a creature with squared-off horns with the figure of a man with some kind of spear? It was pretty hard to tell with just shadows on the floor

Adachi also said that Personas don’t usually appear in our world, so I’m a little confused about what mine is up to - if it is a Persona. I trust Adachi’s judgement, given he has more experience in that area than me, but there are other details that don’t line up with his recounts of Personas:

• A Persona is a ‘puppet’. Mine acts almost on its own accord outside of ability usage. 

• A Persona cannot appear in ‘the real world’. Though rare, I genuinely believe I’ve seen it. 

• A Persona generally can’t use skills in ‘the real world’. Adachi didn’t seem too bothered by this discrepancy, but if it counts as a differing factor, I want to pay attention to this. 

He likes to refer to it as a Persona, but based on his own description it falls almost flat. Adachi seems to have full control over the actions of his Persona, but when I use my ability successfully I don’t do much ‘commanding’ outside of Actualisation - his suggestion was to try ‘holding the Persona for a long time’ but ‘not to try it at home’. I want to question why and do it right now, but I’d rather not try my luck in a place where I might not receive the right help. 

My own suggestion would be to explore what’s currently possible with my Persona. I know about Actualisation, but what if it’s capable of other things that I’m completely unaware of? It could be possible that, like how Hearts are cognitive ‘organs’ that can be ‘wounded’, Personas are ‘muscles’ that need to be ‘exercised’. That would be the best explanation for Adachi’s control over his own Persona. 

Although… If Adachi doesn’t know how to train Personas outside of a cognitive world, how is he managing to do it in our world?? 

Chapter Text

Maruki paused. The laptop screen blared, drying his eyes in the darkness of his apartment. In the corner of the screen a notification popped up, a blue bell with the title ‘ Tokyo News Network has updated a news story: …’ that trailed off. Maruki shut his eyes, sighing as he brought his fingers under his glasses to rub his eyes. I need to read the news more often. If I ignore it now, I’ll forget to read it in the morning. When his eyes opened again the notification vanished, leaving him to read the time on his laptop. 11:13 PM. I should have some spare time… He looked over the cognitive report again and tilted his head into a small shrug, closing out of the document to follow his notification, which in turn opened his browser to show him the news story. 

‘Magnanimous’ Medjed Versus The ‘Phantastic’ Thieves: Hacktivists Against Activists?

Online phenomenon and ‘hacktivist’ group Medjed have released a declaration of cybernetic war against The Phantom Thieves, who have been deemed ‘unjust’.

Medjed is an anonymous group who are self-described ‘hacktivists’, existing outside of the law. They’re a national group consisting of an unknown number who are recently claiming to ‘be on the side of justice’, according to their updated website as of Monday the 18th. Their work revolves around targeting corporations that break business laws and most recently the Medjed Subway Server Hijacking , linked in our article produced earlier this year. 

The Phantom Thieves, on the other hand, are an up-and-coming group who also consider themselves on the side of justice. Their recent escapades this year include forcing ex olympian and ex teacher Suguru Kamoshida into a confession of sexual assault and pedophilia and then forcing ex artist Ichiryusai Madarame into a confession of plagiarism and theft of his pupils’ works. Their most recent work involves Junya Kaneshiro’s capture by police, obsessing over his greed and use of teenagers as transporters of drugs. 

As such, this Monday Medjed declared digital war on The Phantom Thieves. Their message, as posted on their website states ‘To The Phantom Thieves causing an uproar in Japan: Do not speak of your false justice’. The link to the rest of their message is here, although the website itself has been making the rounds on the internet due to its recent creation and what some describe to be SEO techniques. 

In the popular TV show ‘Good Night Japan’, Detective Goro Akechi was interviewed on the matter. His thoughts on the matter are blunt: “Whether it’s a sense of rivalry or a simple attention grab given the recent trends, [...] it’s quite a nuisance.” He goes on to state “It’s possible that people like [Medjed] will continue to appear due to their influence. In that respect, The Phantom Thieves face a very serious crime.” 

As the situation progresses we will keep the public informed - this criminal versus criminal foray won’t go anywhere, given there are no further comments at the time of writing. 

[Updated at 5:01 PM on Wednesday the 20th]

Medjed has released a declaration of victory on their website. Their notice as summarised by other sources denounces any support of The Phantom Thieves, leaving an air of an invisible threat behind their words. Below is part of the message, translated from English into Japanese:

“The Phantom Thieves remain silent at our question. This proves that we are just. [...] We are Medjed. We are unseen. We will eliminate evil.” 

Is it possible that The Phantom Thieves have backed down? Medjed as a hacktivist group have established themselves throughout their time as a powerful group, taking down even larger corporations throughout Japan - it’s entirely possible that both groups were in private contact and came to an agreement or time limit by which consequences would be enacted - this is, however, personal speculation. 

We will update this article if any more developments occur.

Maruki sighed. I don’t think a refusal to comment means that Medjed won, or that they would have been in ‘private contact’. He went to close the article before a thought crossed his mind. Though this is interesting. Why would Medjed, as far as I’ve heard about them, pick The Phantom Thieves to fight with right now? He tried to put pieces together but he felt the lightbulb in his brain beginning to flicker. They both know how to find personal information… They both remain as anonymous groups… It was fading... They both have an online following? It was gone. It’s so late. He checked the time again. It doesn’t help that I read so slowly… It’s about 11:30 now. He shut his laptop gently and left it off of the side of his mattress, not wanting to crush it in his sleep. 

Over the next week the thoughts had baked long enough. He sat up quickly, ignoring the dull ache and dents in his face and head from having his glasses on while he slept. Wait, The Phantom Thieves? Medjed? He got up and barely had the reflexes to grab his glasses, which were eager to be free from his nose. He sat them carefully on his pillow and checked the time on his phone. I’m not running late. Let’s relax a little bit. He slowed down, though his chest was humming with a feeling of excitement, like a hummingbird at a small flower. If I look for more information it might tell me how The Phantom Thieves steal hearts - and why Medjed thinks that it’s a threat. That would be the only reason to target the Thieves, right?

He brushed his teeth, changed his clothes and almost forgot the food in the fridge - he packed away his lunch, still unused to the schedule as of late. He filled his bag and took his phone, then he set off. On the train he couldn’t stop thinking about it. The idea that Medjed is targeting them for popularity points doesn’t sound like something either party would want. Medjed, from what information is in that article, if I remember right, wants to keep their notoriety down so that defence against their cyber attacks remains lower. Wouldn’t becoming popular give the public more information against them? 

He hopped off at his stop and checked his bag over. Oh shoot, my water bottle… He opened it up but alas, it was something he forgot. That’s alright, I’ll just deal with it. He paused for a moment in his walk, shuffling over to the wall of a building nearby so that he wouldn’t be in anyone’s way in the morning foot traffic. I didn’t bring any juice boxes with me either. I really don’t want to speak to the staff outside of what is necessary… He looked at the different buildings silently before turning tail again. Nope. Just because I’m not running late right now doesn’t mean there isn’t a line waiting for me nearby. I’ll just… Go ask for a cup or something. He picked up his pace again. 

The next time that he saw Adachi he was running a little bit behind schedule. Maruki accompanied Warden Maeda with a plastic mug, trying not to spill the water on his walk over to the door. Adachi held his arms by his side, waiting with a polite smile and head tilt as they grew closer. Maruki’s awkward smile grew worse as he came to understand Adachi’s reaction. That smile means nothing, right? 

“Honestly, for a doctor you need to take care of yourself. I’m out here, running off like a headless goose because of you - since when did I have to play mother?” Maeda scolded Maruki, sighing as she opened the door for the two of them. I’m sorry, Warden. He couldn’t say it out loud, it was like someone stole his voice. All he could do was bring his head down a little further than it already was as a partial apology. 

“Adachi, watch yourself. If he collapses from dehydration they might just think you did it.” Maeda sighed, gesturing with her hand to get both of them into the room. Adachi gave a small laugh and shrug, stepping inside and allowing Maruki to follow before he pulled the door shut. Once the line of sight was broken, Adachi’s expression changed like lightning struck the building. With an undertone of confusion, it was more amused than betrayed - which Maruki was thankful for as he sat down. 

“What was that about? For a moment it looked like she found your bad grades or something.” Adachi laughed, of course finding it funny when he wasn’t the one in that position. Maruki sighed, rubbing the back of his neck as he briefly recalled the cause of his situation. Yeah, I really should have just asked when I was getting security-checked. 

“I forgot to bring my water for today. And it’s summer. I think I was on the verge of passing out in my last counselling session, which… Is embarrassing, to say the least.” Maruki could see bits and pieces of what happened but he was pretty delirious during the moment Maeda came in to collect the next inmate. The next he could tell he was in the staff room for the wardens and feeling the pain of ice hitting his teeth. I didn’t want to bother them - and I should have just bought something from a konbini. I don’t know what I was thinking - lines, at a konbini? Adachi sat at the desk but his amusement turned into a kind of judgement he hadn’t felt before. There’s no need to salt my wounds. Maruki smiled awkwardly and shrugged, hoping to switch the topic. 

“Oh! Lunch. Also, if you don’t mind, I want to work on something before we get back to our main focus.” Maruki leaned over to find his bag and first took out his bento box, setting that on the table first before grabbing his laptop. Adachi looked between the laptop and the bento, almost like he had something to say but he didn’t. Without a response Maruki assumed that it was fine and opened his laptop to begin work. 

“Hey, I think you’re forgetting something, Doc. ” Adachi leaned over the edge of the table to shut the laptop screen. Maruki sat for a moment, looking over the table again. The book? He looked at Adachi and then back at the things on the table again. The book. He leaned down to his bag again. By the time he sat back up with the thriller series in his hands, Adachi had been burying his face into his hands. Not the book?  

“I’ve seen some of the dumbest kids in my lifetime, but I didn’t expect the dumbest person I’d come across to be a full grown man ,” Adachi gestured to the lunch box. If there had been even a tiny speck of life in his eyes, by now it was gone. Maruki stared at the box as well for a moment before catching on. “This is your lunch. Stop acting like it’s mine. If you’re setting aside basic needs to ‘help’ someone else, you’re not actually helping anyone .” Adachi folded his arms and let his eyes wander around the room, as if trying to remember something else. Maruki smiled awkwardly and apologetically. This is a bit much to put on you, especially after having me admit that I nearly passed out. 

“I don’t think it was necessary to make that comparison, but… I do understand. I feel like I’ve been all over the place lately.” Maruki sighed quietly before he stood up to reach it. He opened it up, showing that inside was some mixed rice and some extra vegetables in their own section. He split the rice down the middle with his chopsticks and offered a separate pair to Adachi, who had gone quiet for that moment. I mean, these sessions have long ceased to involve counselling. We both need to open up, if it needs to be me to take the first step, I’ll do it happily. He paused for a second when he noticed that Adachi hadn’t moved, but before he could say anything else Adachi took the chopsticks. 

“If I take these, will you shut up and sit down?” Adachi took up some of the rice, holding his hand underneath it as he ate. As Maruki sat back down he smiled at the reaction. I don’t know what your deal is. Every time that I think I have you figured out, you surprise me. All I know is that you aren’t being hostile, at least. 

“I’m serious, though. I’ve been thinking about some things a lot, given how the news is going. It relates somewhat to my research as well.” Maruki held his hands together, one over another with the chopsticks held horizontally within the lower one. He took Adachi’s silence as a hint to go on. 

“Have you heard that Medjed and The Phantom Thieves are having a fight? Medjed has declared a kind of victory over them from what I can tell, I can’t read English so I could only take what the article said.” Maruki hummed quietly. Does Adachi know any English, actually? He seems pretty smart like that. Would a detective need to know English? His thoughts fell silent as Adachi responded. 

“Yeah, unfortunately I’m aware. They play nothing but the news anywhere there’s a TV. So… The Phantom Thieves’ whole ‘Steal Your Heart’ slogan is something you’re interested in, right?” Adachi looked at Maruki’s hands briefly before setting his own chopsticks aside. Maruki watched him quietly before sighing, taking his turn to eat. He’s saying that he won’t eat until I do. This isn’t really the way I expected to be put in a corner. It’s a nice thing to do, but if I said that out loud Adachi might flat out lose it. 

“It is, actually. If these cognitive worlds can be considered the hearts of our minds, if The Phantom Thieves claim that they can ‘take them’... Then my idea of a cognitive world being a heart is wrong.” Maruki’s smile wavered a little. I know I’ll have to readjust my research if that’s the case.  

“Well, it’s not like you can take an entire world. It’s hard to imagine if we shipped a TV out from Inaba during the murders that the world would come with it.” Adachi shrugged, kicking one leg over the other as he seemed to become more comfortable. Right. It’s not tied to an object, it’s like it’s tied to a location and conditions. The gate can move but once it’s outside of the property line it ceases to exist… Maruki went quiet for a short moment before he added on. 

“Is it like… Oh, you said that the TV world would become foggy or clear depending on the weather outside, right? Is it possible to change the internal conditions to affect the outside, like it was in reverse?” Maruki smiled, wondering if he was now on the right track. Adachi gave him a flat look before he spoke up. 

“I was a detective, Doc. I’m not a meteorologist. All I know is that when it’s foggy, there’s less shadows and when it’s clear, there’s more. If you think you’ve caught onto something, that’s great for you.” Adachi lifted his head up momentarily to look inside the box before he thought there was a significant enough difference between their portions to begin eating again. Oh, that’s true. Though I wasn’t really referring to weather affecting hearts, I guess Adachi would have no idea about that…

“Then I have a question for you. Who do you think The Phantom Thieves are?” Maruki smiled. Maybe this would be more entertaining for you. Adachi looked at Maruki for a moment before he smiled a little, his brows furrowing down. 

“If you want to play a game, the game needs stakes. If we’re going to take guesses, remember who you’re up against for a second.” Oh, if you’ve taken it that way, then I don’t mind. Maruki thought about it for a moment. Stakes… What would Adachi want from me? It’s only a small game, so it’s not like it has to be anything overly fancy. Of arguable importance - what would Adachi give me if I got it right? His smile became awkward as he realised that Adachi couldn’t get him anything at all - or at least it felt that way. 

“Why, did you have stakes in mind?” Maruki hoped that Adachi had an idea at least. Adachi’s smile became mischievous as he answered, fairly quickly like it was off the top of his head. 

“Well, it’s not like I could get you anything worth more than a handful of yen around here. Why don’t we do favours? The person who loses will owe the other a favour.” Adachi beamed. He’s already thinking about different opportunities, huh? Maruki sighed, feeling the dread hit him at once after the air left his throat. Fair is fair. I don’t exactly mind the fact I’m likely to lose, I just don’t know what I would get out of having Adachi owe me a favour. He watched Adachi again before a kind of warmth hit his heart. He does seem quite happy, though. Should I suggest more games like this in the future?

“Sure, that sounds good to me. You’ll probably have me start, since you’re so confident, then?” Maruki smiled again, deciding to play along. He placed his hands flat on top of the table, while Adachi sat back. 

“Well, if I spoke first, I’d give you the answer, wouldn’t I? ” He was still beaming, like a sparkler had been lit up. His excitement is almost infectious. Maruki laughed a little, brushing off the smug attitude before he started to really think about it. Now, while I know that Amamiya, Sakamoto and I think Takamaki all appeared out of thin air that day… That doesn’t tie them to being a Phantom Thief just yet. 

I’ve had a sneaking suspicion that The Phantom Thieves are using Hearts as a means of influencing the behaviour of those they visit. The targets so far have been that gym teacher, the famous artist Madarame and an infamous criminal. I’m trying to remember what exactly each of them did to be forced to apologise for their crimes… That gym teacher did unspeakable things to the students. Madarame… He stole art from his pupils, didn’t he? And the big mafia guy… The biggest thing that I can remember is that he was using children as vehicles for drugs. They all seem to have targeted children in their past, but… Medjed makes no sense.

Maruki was silent for a couple of minutes, his string of thought breaking. Wait. So… Children… But then Medjed has been known to target big corporations. Medjed targeted The Phantom Thieves first, right? But then… It could still be the fact that those other criminals have targeted children and that Medjed is an exception - it’s not even set in stone that The Phantom Thieves WILL change their hearts at all. That only tells me that whoever they are, they care about children. If I link this to the three I found outside the school that day… If they are Phantom Thieves, they might be particularly sensitive to those crimes because they ARE children. But then… Should I tell Adachi that information? Maruki looked back at Adachi, who by now was also silently lost in thought. No. I don’t think I should, not right now.

“Well… What if they were children? As in, The Phantom Thieves. Every time that they’ve sent a calling card out to someone, their crime has involved children getting hurt in some way.” Maruki began. Adachi looked him over before adding his own piece. 

“Is that your final answer? I thought we were going to be more specific.” Adachi seemed disappointed with Maruki’s answer. 

“Then let me specify: They must be high schoolers, at least a group of three.” Maruki doubled down, which seemed to bring some enjoyment back for Adachi. What am I saying? I don’t have anything to back it up, just based on the news stories. I don’t think it’s a good idea to tell Adachi what I really know because those kids might not actually be related to The Phantom Thieves at all. 

“That’s better. I feel better about my turn now.” Adachi laughed a little, resting his arms on the chair now that he was beginning to comment more. He didn’t ask about why I thought that way - is it because he thinks the same? Maruki watched as Adachi let his hand rest on the desk, curling his fingers up to count. 

“First of all, we know that all of the crimes have involved children as their victims at some point. That doesn’t necessarily scream to me that they’re children, though - it’s because of where it started. I’d say you’re right in their age range, considering the first guy to go bawling his eyes out was a high school gym teacher. Doesn’t that feel specific?” Adachi paused briefly before he continued, deciding not to let Maruki speak for the moment. 

“An ex-olympian. He rose up so high, only to be left as a high school teacher in the end. His crime was sexual assault and coercion, which was the biggest no-no they pointed out in the news. Aside from that he admitted to beating his male students and, if you’ll let me point out - there’s no way the school couldn’t have known about that. Abuse cases are typically hard to talk about because one way or another, one person has a large amount of power and makes life hell for anyone else who wants to play hero against them.” Adachi sighed, thinking about it. Even though it’s a sensitive topic, he doesn’t seem to be having any trouble at all addressing it. I think he just ran out of breath while he was speaking. Maruki sat still, trying to keep a track of everything that Adachi was pointing out. 

“At least, his fellow teachers definitely knew and turned a blind eye to it. Seems a bit fucked up, but you know, what would I know about that. If everyone in the school kept their mouths shut, who else would stand up except a couple of students with nothing to lose? Students who go to that school. I might get a little daring and say that these students also faced his abuse and it was about time they snapped, but there’s no evidence - just a feeling with a big, scary man like that. I used to let teachers walk all over me at school, as a kid.” Adachi folded his arms. Were there some details in the news report that I missed? Maruki was speechless for a moment. 

“So, the favour, right?” Maruki laughed a little, deciding to lighten the mood up by admitting his defeat. Adachi beamed with pride before he let his pointer finger uncurl from his hand. 

“Hold on. The second one, that Madarame prick. The news was just throwing shit at the wall for him, he was the art world’s favourite. He stole his pupil’s artworks and claimed it as his own, but the biggest thing for them was that he stole this one painting in particular - Sayuri or whatever it was called. It was basically his Mona Lisa, everyone and their mother involved in that industry vomited praise whenever they saw it. His pupils were children, yes, but that brings the question - if The Phantom Thieves weren’t personally involved this time, why would they go out of their way to target Madarame? And, bare in mind, we have now established they’re anywhere between sixteen to eighteen years old. If your guess is correct, and it feels oddly specific to me - I’ll talk to you about that in a minute - then there are only three of them. If I remember right, the design of the card changes between the first target and the second - either they got their shit together or they recruited another kid to join them. It would make sense that it’s another one of Madarame’s pupils who saw through his bullshit, but it could have been an ex pupil as well who already separated themselves from him, either way it’s got to be another kid. Funny how the design changes when they recruit an art student, huh?” Adachi’s smile grew wider as he watched Maruki’s shock and horror when he mentioned ‘the specific information’ part. Oh, I have no choice but to say it, then. Maruki breathed in to comment, but Adachi spoke again with his third finger pointing out now. 

“And we’ve got the trickiest of them all, that Kaneshiro nutcase from the mafia. He was known for using kids as his drug mules, but it’s also that he was draining their money from their bank accounts and basically wiping his ass with them. In the calling card it talked about how greedy and what an annoying bitch he was for running those kids into the ground. This is where I’m iffy - The news ran specials on him and spoke about his past life and how poor he was, and how he had to join the mafia to earn more than his own rent - but as far as I can tell, the mafia doesn’t employ children.” Adachi turned his chair slightly so that he could lean his elbow on the table, still holding his three fingers up.

“Here’s where I run into a crossroad - the kid they hire next is either a target of that guy’s tactics, which - let’s be honest, doesn’t sound like a smart move if they got tricked into hauling drugs around Tokyo coin lockers, or it was someone who is somehow related to those kids who got their shit lost. I’m sitting here wracking my brain for something, but all I can think of who would really care is a sibling of someone who was targeted. It feels like the police got shrunken dicks over it and hushed the media because a bunch of kids took out a hardened criminal like that when they couldn’t. Or, well, in their eyes, another criminal group took out the other. It’s a bit hard when I don’t have an insider perspective here.” Adachi shrugged. Maruki stayed quiet as he reviewed what Adachi had said so far. So… As far as I can tell, Sakamoto and Takamaki’s stories line up very well with what Adachi guessed about them. 

They’re both victims of Kamoshida’s abuse, from what I’ve read about Sakamoto and what I’ve heard from Takamaki. But then… Amamiya was definitely affected, but he doesn’t feel like the kind of person who would ‘snap’ in that period of time. He’s so patient, letting me speak so much about myself and what I’m thinking before he gets a word in. Every time he’s spoken about other people he’s done so politely, well - it feels like he’s been opening up a little bit more lately and allowing himself to say sillier things. It seems like Adachi thinks that all three students were at the school for a long time. And then… It’s true that they don’t hang around the school after class. Maybe they really did pick up another student - but then… A lot of the students going to Shujin were affected by the drug muling incident. So much so, I hear that they held an emergency assembly just to tell the kids how to deal with that kind of situation. 

“Right. Do you think that this next recruit would be from the same school as the previous three? Honestly, you’re really impressive for being so detailed so far.” Maruki smiled, pulling his hands onto his lap to relax. It’s such a shame that… You did the things that you did. However convenient it is for me, in this moment of time - it’s such a shame that someone like you did those horrible things. If the pain in your heart has led you to this place, I want to fix it. 

“I mean, you would hope so. Kids like that, they clump together and talk about the power of bonds and shit. It’s so much harder to trust someone who doesn’t already know your situation. It’s highly likely but it’s not definitive - I only speak from experience.” Adachi kicked his leg gently, looking back down to the bento box - though his eyes seemed to look right through it, rather than at it. Experience? Experience of what? Those words tripped Maruki over, who had been so focussed on linking information together. 

“What do you mean by that? Experience with what?” Maruki looked toward the bento box as well, as if Adachi had written his answers inside and was reading them back to him. Almost like a fox with ears bent back, Adachi’s confident expression quickly became mixed with another, which Maruki found to be some kind of embarrassment. 

“ Yeah, probably shouldn’t have run my mouth, ” Adachi muttered under his breath for a moment before he sat up straight. “There’s a lot you don’t already know. Why don’t I keep it short and say I had my ass handed to me by ‘the power of friendship’ and leave it there?” They both stayed quiet after that sentence. Oh no, please don’t laugh. Maruki remained still, freezing every part of his body as if it would help with the smile that was trying to break free of his lips. Don’t do it. He looks so embarrassed, he’s not going to like it if you laugh. Maruki brought his fingers up to his glasses to adjust them, but even with a moment to smile underneath his hand he had lost control after that point. Even though his laugh was quiet and warm, Adachi could only lean into his lap and sigh as Maruki lost it. 

“I’m sorry, did you just refer to - what I can only assume… Is a group of teenagers, as ‘the power of friendship’? Are you saying that a group of children beat you up? Granted,” Maruki became serious for a split moment as he spoke. “I don’t understand Personas that well yet, and they can probably do things I have no idea about.” He went quiet after that before returning to his laughter, which he was trying so hard to keep down. He raised a hand to his mouth as if it would help. 

“But they were the ones who caught you out?” Maruki finally found a moment to calm himself down as Adachi folded his arms, taking a slow breath in. 

“Yeah. Turns out that children have more hope for the future, what do you want from me? I wanted to-” Adachi cut himself off. Oh no, this is actually serious. A sense of dread came back to Maruki as he realised that Adachi might not have said everything in one go. Well of course it’s serious, these children stopped a serial killer from running rampant in their town. What were you thinking, laughing like that? I’m so sorry, I want to say it now but I don’t know if that would cut you off further… Maruki held his hands together and began to squeeze them in his lap. 

“It was a little funny. I mean, a grown man, a police officer, getting his teeth kicked in by a bunch of kids? I’m not gonna shoot you for laughing.” Adachi sat back up, but his arms were still folded over his chest. His leg had stopped kicking and remained completely still. I still shouldn’t have laughed. I knew it would hurt your feelings. Just because you’re accepting it now doesn’t mean it didn’t have any effect.

“So, what - did you get the information you wanted out of me?” He changed the subject. He was going to say something else, but he never did. This is really what I should get. Maruki nodded quietly, his fingers going white from the pressure they held against each other. 

“Yes, thank you.” Maruki went quiet for a moment as he convinced himself to apologise - not that there was much need to, outside of the fact that he was debating whether or not Adachi would accept one. He looked at the lunch box again as he built his voice back up. 

“I’m really sorry for laughing. Even if you say it’s fine now, I didn’t stop to listen to everything that you wanted to talk about. I didn’t mean to be malicious…” Maruki held his tongue between his teeth. Yes, I didn’t mean to be malicious but that doesn’t mean that I wasn't. I really wouldn’t blame Adachi for walking out right now. Despite that, Adachi remained still. As he should, he should walk out right now. And he remained. I mean, I would want to, myself. 

“It’s fine, seeing you squirm was fun, though.” Adachi laughed, letting life return to his body. What. Maruki looked Adachi over, who was now kicking his leg and letting his arms rest on the table. Did I catch you in a good mood? Maruki went blank, any springs that were holding his tension together broke. What do you mean?  

“I want to know, now that you’re sufficiently emotionally exhausted - You have information that I don’t. You were weirdly silent and surprised when I started running my mouth.” Adachi tilted his head, watching Maruki closely again. Oh, you got me there. Maruki looked around the room for a moment before he sighed.

“Well… I kind of had some suspicions earlier on. I didn’t really have anything that might link them concretely… Do you remember that I told you that some children outside the front of my other work appeared ‘out of thin air’?” Maruki let his hands relax. Adachi is too smart for me. It feels like no matter what I do, as soon as I start thinking about something he can catch onto it. I don’t know how those kids managed to catch him off guard. 

“Yeah, I do. Like you, I didn’t want to use that as evidence they were Phantom Thieves. Anyone can walk into a cognitive world, it’s not definitive. It does get way more specific when you look at the first confession again, though. At least we were on the same page.” Adachi hummed quietly. 

“So, now what? What I said isn’t a hundred percent. Just because I profiled them doesn’t mean that they actually are Phantom Thieves either. I wasn’t even the best detective in either department I served. That belonged to a little blue shit - let’s leave that behind us for the moment, though.” Adachi shrugged, leaning back in his chair. That’s true, but you were so confident before. Maybe that confidence is convincing me. Maruki stayed silent for a moment before he decided to be honest to Adachi. 

“Well, I see one of those students frequently for my counselling sessions. He’s decided to help me a little bit with my research, although he doesn’t know as much as you do about it. I’ve been debating about whether or not I should be more open about it with him… I mean, you’ve been very helpful and irreplaceable. If he knows how to ‘change someone’s heart’, though… I want to know how.” Maruki nodded to himself, running his thumb over the ridges of his knuckles as he thought out loud. He looked up to the roof as he recalled some of the conversations that he’d already had with Ren before he looked at Adachi properly.

“Right, because he’ll just tell you openly and trust you completely.” Adachi’s tone was flat. Well, when you say it like that it does make it sound silly. 

“I’m sure you know what I mean. So long as I remain indirect and don’t mention anything that he hasn’t already mentioned, I should be fine, right?” Maruki smiled awkwardly with a shrug, realising how little planning he really had. Adachi looked him up and down before leaning onto the desk. 

“Aren’t you afraid of having your heart changed? What makes you feel so comfortable bringing someone like that closer to you?” Adachi’s expression changed but Maruki couldn’t tell what it had changed into. Before he was sarcastic, at times happy but… What’s that look? You can’t be concerned for me, can you? Maruki’s smile relaxed and he shook his head. 

“I’ve done nothing wrong. If I had, I’d already be on their bad list, wouldn’t I?” Maruki looked over to the clock.

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 30th 20XX

Regrettably, we didn’t get to do any Persona training today. 

Instead, I was interested in Medjed’s conflict with The Phantom Thieves and I introduced this idea to Adachi. I asked for his thoughts on who The Phantom Thieves might be, and he confirmed my own suspicions in his profiling. 

With even an ex-detective’s thought process behind my next actions, I feel comfortable in my assumption that, at the very least, Ren Amamiya is a Phantom Thief. As such, I want to know how he ‘changes hearts’ - it would help my own research and understanding of my own ability. It would also be very useful if he revealed to me how he enters the cognitive world…

I do recognise that these are big asks, though. I don’t want to put Amamiya on high alert or feel like he has to hide away from me. I genuinely admire the work that The Phantom Thieves have done, it’s just a shame that children have to do the work that adults around them should already be doing. 

I’ll have to talk to him a little more the next time I see him, and I’ll see if he’s comfortable with getting to know me a bit better. From there I can better work out how to really talk to him about my research, if he feels up for it. 

Chapter Text

Maruki smiled, holding his hands in his lap as he listened along to his client. So it’s going well for you, too. I wonder, should we stop seeing each other? He watched as the man, who was taller than him even while sitting, beamed and made several gestures with his hands as he spoke. 

“Honestly, after that I felt like I was pretty put together. Y’know, the shit you talk about really helps sometimes. At the start, I was like - what’s this guy’s deal? And now, it’s like - I get mad, sure, but I’ve got ways of dealin’ with it now.” It was the man that Adachi pointed out for ‘having a short fuse’ on the first day that Maruki arrived. His name, as he had come to learn, was Heisu. 

“Well, the theory makes no difference until it’s put into practice. I’m really glad that it’s helping you, Heisu.” Maruki was happy and he tried to make himself present for him, but it was tough when he was mentally tallying the data he’d been collecting from these experiments. He’ll probably never know how he’s helped me… Maruki hummed quietly for a moment. 

“You look like you have something else to add.” Heisu was straightforward, crossing his arms. He’s just showing that he’s comfortable. I kind of want to pay everyone back… But now that I’m looking at my bag, I realise how silly this must look. ‘Thanks for your hard work, here’s a pack of pocky sticks!’ . His smile became awkward as he leaned down into his bag to grab it. They’ll never know, but I can at least thank them for their efforts. Even if this is seen as a celebration of themselves, which - it pretty much is.  

“I do. Since it’ll be the last session for a lot of people today, I’ve been thinking about what might be the most appropriate thing to celebrate with. I thought that it might be the best thing to give you something that you could enjoy right away, so would you like these?” Maruki held out the box of pocky sticks. The look on Heisu’s face could rival the sun, probably because prisoners did not get regular access to confectionary food. 

It was a similar scene among the different clients Maruki concluded his services with. It was pretty warming to see everyone take a packet, even if they didn’t personally want one. Maruki remained at his desk, beaming silently to himself as he set the desk up for Adachi. One person even said he’d give it to his daughter when she visits him next. It’s really sweet to hear that, and to know that he’s getting more visits now. He went through the documents on his laptop until he found the spreadsheet, deciding to highlight every inmate he’d finished his experiments with in a different colour now that he wasn’t going to be getting any more information from them. There’s only two people aside from Adachi that I’ll be seeing on a regular basis. It’s nothing too serious, just some things that aren’t exactly working out for the two of them right now. Then I’ll conclude the data, process it, then I can start really involving it in the paper.  

Only a knock on the door broke his attention. Maruki’s mind went blank for a moment, like someone had pressed a restart button on his thoughts, before he shut the computer and welcomed Adachi in like he usually did. As Adachi sat, Maruki reached for his bag and paused. Oh, wait. Would Adachi like something like this? He looked between his bag and Adachi, now stuck in an internal debate about whether or not to hand it over. It had been quiet enough that Adachi, whose shadow remained peaking over the side of the desk near the bag, had refused to sit for that moment. 

“What’s wrong, is there something in my teeth?” Adachi joked, tilting his head to one side so that he could see Maruki clearer. I’m sorry, I can’t make up my mind…  

“Sorry, I was just going to grab something…” Maruki shook his head, taking a packet in his hand but it was a shame that the box was longer than it. Adachi froze for only a second before he sat down and let his hands rest on the table. 

“Right. So, we were cut off last week - aren’t you running out of time or something for this whole Persona training you were going on about? Do you want to focus on that today or are you gonna get sidetracked by that Medjed business again?” Adachi folded his arms. He’s not going to ask about it? Maruki looked over to the bento box on the table, going over Adachi’s reaction so far. Oh, maybe he thinks that it’s not for him at all. Well, it is… I just need to say it out loud. It’s hard to say why I have so much doubt over if he’d like them or not - it’s probably just because I can imagine him holding it against me somehow.

“First, would you like this? I’ve been giving them to all of the clients I’m seeing off today… When I saw them, I thought you might like them as well, but it’s okay if you don’t want them.” Maruki smiled awkwardly, holding the box out. Ugh, any semblance of people skills I have just fades when Adachi is in the room. Could I have said that any better? Adachi made a blank expression as he stared at the pocky box. Maybe it should have been something else. Sorry, Adachi. Maruki’s smile became worse and the silence was starting to really get to him. Thankfully, Adachi didn’t leave it quiet for too much longer. 

“Yeah, sure.” Adachi sighed, shrugging as he took it out of Maruki’s hand. Wait, then why did you seem so upset before? Maruki relaxed, at least glad that it wasn’t going to somehow diminish Adachi’s mood by giving him something sweet. I gave him fruit before, but I guess that is still a little bit different to giving someone something covered in chocolate. 

“It’s probably stale, or something.” Adachi added on, kicking one leg over the other as he opened the box and the bag inside. Why would it be stale? It’s factory sealed. Maruki’s brows furrowed as he tried to figure out what Adachi was talking about. You’re oddly defensive. 

“Well… About the training. If you think there’s anything else we could try, I’d be open to it. You’re aware I don’t have work for the next month, so… It’s not like I can’t recover in a month’s time.” Maruki smiled, shrugging Adachi’s reaction off, only until he watched that full grown man take five sticks and bite until half of their bodies were missing. What. What was worse, Adachi kept a straight face like nothing was wrong and maintained eye contact. No. That’s not how you… It took a while before Adachi could speak. 

“Yeah, it sucks that we don’t have a cognitive world to use. So, what? Do you want to just keep trying to get me brainwashed or something?” Adachi ate the rest in his hand, though the way his eyes curled up at Maruki’s horror showed this was a deliberate action and not something he did naturally. There’s no way. You didn’t just take those to mess with me. Your mind is an enigma… Maruki blinked a few times, completely taken off guard. What are we talking about? The training… ‘Do you want to keep’-

“It’s not brainwashing.” Maruki caught up and refuted that point. Adachi smiled and shrugged, silently chewing through the sticks. Now he’s acting like he can’t talk at all. Honestly, it surprises me sometimes how put together you are in one minute and how scattered you feel the next. Maruki sighed, running a hand through his hair as he calmed down - it wasn’t precisely anger or dread, just a little bit of frustration and stuck underneath that, some amusement. If I think back to the first time I noticed my Persona’s shadow on the floor… An idea came to mind, curing his current feelings and replacing them with a small ray of hope.

“Wait, why didn’t I think of this sooner? If I can’t go into the cognitive world to see my Persona but it can appear in my shadow here… Why can’t I give it something to do here? My Actualisation won’t work on you, that much is clear - that much I want to fix.” Maruki nodded along, causing Adachi to cough on his food. You know that karma was waiting for you at the end of those sticks, right? Maruki smiled, happy to see Adachi get what he was owed. You should have eaten it one at a time.

“You want to ‘fix it’? Fix what? It won’t work on Persona users, it’s obvious. There’s nothing to ‘fix’ if it won’t work at all.” Adachi became serious quickly, clearing his throat as he looked Maruki over. What? Isn’t that what we’ve been working on this entire time? Maruki tilted his head slightly, confused as well. I thought it was clear that I was working on my Persona to better use it for this purpose.  

“Well, the whole point is that we don’t fully understand it yet. Training my Persona was supposed to help me learn how to collaborate with it, which in turn was going to fix that issue…” Maruki frowned, holding his hands together. Did I understand this wrong? Did I not communicate this clearly enough? Adachi’s expression turned from a kind of sternness to disappointment. Adachi?

“I thought you wanted more control over what your Persona did. All you can use is one lousy skill, Doc. I thought you wanted to see what else you could do.” Adachi’s expression kept developing as he spoke, from disappointment to disgust. What? Maruki checked over Adachi’s body language repeatedly, wanting to know if he was being genuine or not. Did I not clarify this? I mean, yes, exploring the extent of my Persona would also be great, but not exactly possible in this world, right? The dread built in his chest, weighing him to remain still in his seat. 

“And why do you want to fix that skill? Do you think that there’s something wrong with me?” Adachi’s expression changed from disgust to a muted alarm, like finding a bug too close to your face for comfort. No, that’s not what I intended to say at all…  

“No, no. There’s nothing wrong with you, Adachi. No one I’ve ever used Actualisation on ever had anything wrong with them - there’s just… I see the pain you have to carry. The pain that you’ve always had to carry. I want to help you feel better.” Maruki tried not to show his distress on his face, taking Adachi’s concerns seriously. Even so, the words were hard to say - like everything was heavy and tired. Maybe I should have left this alone. Maybe he’s not ready for a talk like that, it’s overwhelming to be reminded of all of your struggles. 

“You’re always talking about pain this, pain that. Oh how your heart must weep knowing that I’ve committed murder, huh? How I’m so glad that you don’t think that murder is wrong.” Adachi stood up, crushing the pocky box in his hand. The remaining sticks inside cracked softly and the foil bag crinkled a little louder over the top. I’ve really done it now. Maruki frowned, feeling a pain grow in his hands - only to find that when he looked down, the spots his fingers were pressing into were a shiny white. 

“That’s different, Adachi. Your past actions don’t have to reflect on your future.” Maruki kept his voice down, as much as it was hard to when Adachi snapped back. 

“ Wow , why don’t you turn around and tell the entire justice system that? Why don’t you just win them over with hugs and kisses and - roses , and gifts ?” Adachi stumbled over his words, gesturing with his arm at the desk. His anger felt different this time, at least from the last time he fully broke down. When was that? When he found out I’d spoken to Yu behind his back. Maruki took a slow breath in. You’re in so much pain. This isn’t intentional, nor is it just to attack me. That pain is complicated and hard to address. If yelling at me will save you from taking it out on anyone else, this is fine. His nails dug into the back of his hand, winding himself tightly together to stand his ground. 

“Adachi, if you keep yelling you might get the Warden to have the wrong idea. I don’t want our time to be cut short before we can address this.” Maruki thought that reminding Adachi about that would be the best way forward, but that just seemed to light something in his eyes that already seemed shaken. The wrong words, again. Maruki winced as Adachi came closer. 

“You don’t have to worry about that, Doctor . She won’t need to have the wrong idea.” I may be in danger. Maruki’s eyes flicked to Adachi’s hand, and he grabbed that hand just as it ripped on his tie. I grabbed the wrong thing! Maruki used his other hand to dig his fingers into his neck, between it and the tie so that it couldn’t go any tighter than it already had. The world by now was silent, Maruki couldn’t hear himself at all, how his breath wheezed and barely whistled in, like an old engine beginning to start. His hands shook and for a moment, he forgot the rest of his body existed - the only thing he was focussed on was Adachi’s face. 

It was a complicated expression - what would normally be a kind of joy in seeing Maruki struggle was blank and lifeless. It ate any light that came in, like a blackhole concealing the aura of stars. What was more confusing is that they shook, though it took Maruki a little longer to notice - that Adachi was shaking all over. The teeth he bore in his mouth lightly tapped against each other, which didn’t make sense to Maruki either. Hasn’t he killed someone before? Why do you look so scared? That thought woke him up. I’m going to die if I don’t do something! His eyes rolled around the room before he had a quick, not very planned out thought. He stood up, headbutting Adachi as he tried not to trip backwards into his chair again at the angle he was standing at. It was enough to shake Adachi’s grip, but not enough to deter him as he seemed to take Maruki a little more seriously. 

Now my head just hurts. Maruki tried to keep himself facing Adachi, who went to move in behind him. Adachi kicked the chair, having it roll violently to the wall and crash, flipping over with a couple of scratches on the wall. Maruki was expecting Adachi to lunge at him again, but he remained still. Adachi held the tie upward, which didn’t do much except force Maruki to take one more step closer. Then Adachi stared at the door, and it didn’t take too much longer after that thump that it opened. 

It happened in a blur next, wordlessly. The image was set in stone, and Warden Maeda dove over the desk to break Maruki and Adachi apart. Maruki tried not to trip over himself as the tie got yanked downward before being released, leaving him coughing and sputtering as he blurrily watched Adachi’s wrists get cuffed together. Wait a minute. Maruki squinted, trying to see what was happening clearer and what Maeda had been saying. 

“How could I have guessed that you of all people would be a problem? Sit still! ” Maeda snarled, her body hopping just for a moment as Adachi rolled over. Doesn’t this mean… Maruki’s heart sank. 

“Makin’ it easier, warden . I’m so hard to trust , how could you just leave my hands in front of myself instead of behind?” Adachi laughed, only to be cut off as Maeda dug her elbow into Adachi’s neck. Maruki couldn’t say anything, frozen as Adachi ignored Maruki now. 

“I’m so sorry, Doctor. He has a way of snaking into goodwill and taking it back. What am I going to do with you, boy?” The warden, who was at least neutral before, seemed to get angrier thinking her own words now. Adachi could only smile, returning to his friendly persona. 

“I think you know the rules better than I do. Well? Let’s go, you only have so many hours on your clock.” Adachi laughed, eyes scrunching shut as he did so. Maeda sighed, getting off of Adachi so that she could pull him to his feet. 

“Don’t get snipe-y with me, boy . Again, Doctor - I sincerely apologise. I’ll be right back, if you’re okay with waiting alone for a moment.” Maeda’s behaviour completely changed when she spoke to Maruki, her voice gentle compared to the harshness she was giving Adachi. Maruki looked between her and Adachi again, and as much as he wanted to plead for Adachi’s case right now, it felt like no words of his own could fix what the warden saw. She pulled Adachi along, who didn’t have to walk too much faster than usual to keep to her pace, and she disappeared off and down the hallway with him. 

Maruki looked at his hands when he couldn’t stare down the hallway any longer, seeing them jitter in place. I don’t know how I must look right now. He raised his hands slowly to feel his neck. There’s definitely a line, at least… He looked back down at his hands again, then at his nails specifically. Red, almost rosy… He felt his neck again and winced, now noticing the pain. When I dug my nails in, I scratched myself. He looked down at his nail again. There’s nothing in it aside from the stain… He looked at his tie. Oh, that’s where it went. He loosened the tie until he could take it off, tossing it lightly onto the desk. There was a bit of blood where he must have held it with his defending hand, but he couldn’t remember a moment at all where he did that. When? His mind refused to work. 

It continued to malfunction until Maeda got back, her steps down the hallway alerting Maruki to her presence long before she stood before him. She took a slow breath in and sighed as she looked around the room again, folding her arms. With her sleeves rolled up like they were Maruki could see where she was beginning to bruise, having leapt over the table like that. You were only doing your job. You saw a guest in danger and followed what you’ve been taught. I can’t imagine how your ribs must look right now, though - you flew across that desk.  

“Are you okay?” Maruki offered those words first and he watched her go through the seven stages of grief. I know, it’s an odd question at a time like this.  

“What about you? Adachi doesn’t give up much of a fight once he’s really caught.” Maeda crossed her arms, taking another slow breath in. Of course, she just switched from zero to a hundred and now she’s trying to come back to that zero again. She’s calming herself down.

“I’m okay. I look worse than I really am.” Maruki nodded slowly, taking a slow breath in as well. I didn’t even notice how fast my heart is going right now, but I feel it in my throat now that everything has settled down. Feeling it like this is almost giving me more anxiety than when I was being attacked - almost. 

“You’ve got to call out more when something like that happens, boy. Nearly gave me a heart attack when I walked in. Ugh, maybe I should have been more concerned when I heard him start yelling.” Maeda frowned, looking at the table again as she seemed to be assessing the damage. It’s not your fault. I should have called out, I just didn’t do it. I don’t know why I didn’t call out for help. He also looked over the table.

“Huh. Did you miss your lunch break? Is that a bento box?” Maeda blinked a few times, noticing it on the floor nearby. Oh, you’re right. Maruki also looked over to the cracked remains of his bento box, and the contents spilt over the floor thanks to Maeda’s actions. That’s okay. It’s not your fault. If you ask, I’ll just say it was already spilled. 

“Yes, I did. That’s okay though, I would have had time after this…” Maruki laughed a little, awkwardly as he realised how bad he made Adachi sound. I don’t mean it like that. I just can’t let her know I was… Maruki’s heart sank. Will I ever see you again?

“Will he still need counselling?” The words came out faster than he could stop himself. One of Maeda’s eyebrows rose as she stepped around the desk, coming to look at the wall where the chair had been kicked. 

“Counselling? I thought you did therapy.” Maeda tilted her head, coming over to the wall to move the chair out of her way. She used the back of her thumb to feel the scratch and looked back at it. It seemed like some of the scratch came off, indicating that the paint on the chair was the main cause, rather than genuine damage. 

“I apologise, I use those words mutually. I really shouldn’t, it gets a bit confusing.” Maruki nodded, sighing. Right, I told them I was giving therapy to the people here. Maeda stood up and leaned against the wall, folding her arms again. 

“Well, Doctor. I’m going to be honest with you, that’s not within my scope of work. I don’t get to choose if Adachi comes back in, I just walk your clients around.” Maeda shrugged, though now she seemed attentive. Maruki frowned, looking at the scratch in the wall again. 

“Right. Well… If they ask, could you please tell them that I think we can still work together? Ultimately it is up to Adachi and the staff here as to whether or not I continue to see him, but… I feel like I was making progress.” Maruki’s voice dipped, becoming quieter toward the end of those words. He looked at the floor to see his shadow swirling, a pool of tentacles shifting like hair underwater. I wonder if someone like her can see it. He watched it for a moment, seeing how it spun and spread itself out. You seem agitated. I know… How you feel. Maruki swallowed that thought. 

“Sure, I can convey your intentions. Still, you have been physically assaulted - It’s in your best interest to get this on Adachi’s record. The only way they’re going to learn is if you give them consequence.” Maeda shook her head, sighing. Record? The shadow beneath him froze, like time had stopped. You want me to… Take him to court, again. 

“Why?” Maruki held his hands together, sitting them over his chest as he continued to calm down. I don’t want to add anything more to his sentence. 

“Well, it would be entirely different if you were another inmate. Then we could decide what to do with inside the usual proceedings for something like this. Inmates fight all the time, if we sent each one of them to court over a scuffle it would be a drain on our resources - especially when they’re just a bit roughed up like you. We’d separate them, put them in solitary confinement for a bit and then watch from there. But you are not within our jurisdiction, you’re a guest on this property. That is wildly different. You are not an official part of this facility, so the course of action for you is to seek reparations.” Maeda nodded, though the rest of her body remained unmoving. What you say makes sense… Maruki looked over the room again. 

I’m not sure what to do. I have too little to work with… But I don’t want to ‘seek reparations’, I was the one who provoked him, even if it was an accident. His shadow began to slowly move again, curling around the desk defensively and tucking half of its body under its shelter. 

“Can I refuse?” Maruki couldn’t bring himself to give an apologetic smile. The energy from him was gone, he couldn’t quite bring himself to convey his emotions through his body.

“Sure you can. If you don’t want to, that’s fine - but I still have to report it. Even if you aren’t seriously injured.” Maeda shook her head. Oh. He looked back down to his shadow on the floor, which had since returned to his own silhouette. Should I? He looked back at Maeda again. Is it necessary? He felt the world become so much more colourful than it was for that moment. Red and blue sat on opposite sides of Maeda’s face as the depth of her own body faded into the background. It’s small. Adachi doesn’t need anything more on his record. If I stop it now, I can stop her from telling her higher ups. If I convince her that Adachi was just unruly…  

“But you don’t really know what happened. Adachi got a bit flustered and sure, he knocked some stuff off of the table, but that’s where it ended.” Maruki saw out of the corner of his eye the shadow lurch, a tendril grabbing onto Maeda’s own shadow, unflinching. In the next second, the room was as lifeless as it was before and Maeda had shut her eyes. She was quiet for a moment as she processed Maruki’s words, before opening her eyes again. 

“He’s such a child. Throwing things when he doesn’t get his way, what was it even about, anyway?” Maeda held her head for a moment and her stance wobbled for a moment, but she didn’t seem to think much of it. Maruki smiled a little and shook his head. 

“I don’t even remember now, it was so minor. I genuinely hope he feels better soon, though. I’m glad we talked about this, though - thank you for wanting to check that I was okay.” Maruki gave her some more context through his words, solidifying her grasp on the ‘new situation’ he gave her. Maeda shook her head, smiling a little. 

“Honestly, he gets so wound up over nothing. Some time in solitary confinement will set him straight, but maybe I was too harsh. It’ll only be for a day.” Maeda nodded. Maruki’s heart leapt as he realised that he wasn’t as detailed as he would have liked to have been, but Maeda turned around and made her way to the door. 

“Come on, leave that bento box. I’ll send you off early so you can cool off, alright? He didn’t hit you with anything, did he?” Maeda held onto the door, allowing Maruki to gather his things. He took his tie for a moment and realised that his neck was still exposed. He pulled his collar up a little, though it barely did anything to cover it. I’ll just need to say that I got bit by a bug or something and have a habit of scratching. I think that’s a good excuse… He packed everything into his bag. He looked at his bento box and he felt his heart sink again. I hope you’ll see me again, Adachi. He stepped over the sandwiches with his bag and met Maeda on the other side of the door.

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 6th 20XX

It did not go well today. I narrowly avoided having Adachi’s sentence extended… From what I looked up, it sounds like it would have only been two years at most, but still. It sounds like it would have stopped him from being able to apply for parole if I added onto his sentence. 

I’m still a bit flustered. We had a miscommunication and he tried choking me about it. His actions don’t make sense to me right now. 

Even so, I don’t want our collaboration to end. It felt like I had to use my ability to prevent the staff from knowing what happened. 

Hopefully he comes back next week

Chapter Text

Maruki stared at himself silently in the mirror of his bathroom. He tilted his head, watching the wound on his neck twist with it to be caught in the light of the room. It’s almost gone by now. Even without his glasses on he could tell it was looking a bit dry at the moment, so he grabbed some of the moisturiser on the counter and rubbed it in as gently as he could. The bruise around his neck had long vanished, which he was relieved about considering he had to wear a scarf in the middle of the summer for a short while. I’m not too handy with makeup, so that was my only option for a little bit. He smiled a little, though the drain in his spirit was definitely something that carried in his expression. 

Well, there’s no time to think about that right now. I have work today and I need to be focussed. I can’t afford to be distracted. Maruki found his glasses, laying precariously on the edge of the counter. Whoops. I need those, I’d rather not have them break. He joked with himself before setting them on his face, causing the world through their lens to be clear. There you are, Takuto. Come on now, you can’t be late. He moved through his apartment until he got to the corner where his mattress sat. He rummaged through his dresser, which was almost on its last legs from being so old. He pulled out his coat and wrapped it around himself as he looked over his bag and belongings again. I’m pretty sure I have everything. 

He arrived just a little earlier than he usually did. Generally, all teachers arrived earlier than the students did, but it felt unusual to be one of the first few checking into the faculty office. All he needed to do was make sure that he was clocked in and that he had the key to his office so that he could leave, but he was stopped just for a moment by one of the teachers. 

“Hold on now, Mister Maruki. I can’t help but to notice today that you seem a little drained. Seeing as we have some time before classes begin, would you like to talk about it? I hope you don’t mind that I seem to be offering you counselling.” She smiled with a slight shrug. You’re… Oh! Maruki smiled back, his heart warmed by Miss Chouno’s offer. 

“Oh, no, I couldn’t bother you, Miss Chouno. I really appreciate your gesture, though.” Maruki held his hand up to shake it in a ‘no thank you’ motion. Miss Chouno hummed, holding a hand to her hip as she looked him up and down. She seems so serious all of a sudden. Do I look so worn down? Maruki gave his best beam, hoping that it would help to convince her that he was going to be fine. This can’t be good for the students either… Smile, Maruki.

“Okay. Just remember that there is someone who will listen, okay? You have a nice day now, Mister Maruki. If you’re not feeling well, you can’t help your students either, alright?” Miss Chouno nodded to herself. Of course, you’re right. Maruki nodded as well, laughing a little at the thought. 

“Of course, I must have just had a long night. Thank you, Miss Chouno, I hope you have a nice day as well.” Maruki beamed at her again before making his way out of the door. As soon as he was sure to be out of her view, he let his smile relax. She’s so nice, but sometimes she can’t help but to be a bit intimidating as well. It was nice of her to care about me, but… Maruki smiled again, shrugging his prior emotions off. Nope, we should stick with the nice things if we want to get through the day. It was nice of her to care and to tell me that she did. Thank you, Miss Chouno.

He walked through the empty school to the nurse’s office, taking the key in his hand to unlock the door. After a metallic click, he slid it open and made his way inside. He sat his bag on the coffee table and set aside what he needed to use immediately, which was just his laptop and the book that he was referencing. Then in a different section of his bag he found where he had kept the snacks he just bought for this semester and the snack bowl to keep them in. His smile was genuine when he set the bowl down and packed the Donut-Worries into the bowl. I’m glad I kept this from that time I got the mall cookies for Amamiya. He tried not to crush them, though when he grabbed another handful his fingers struck some cardboard. 

He peered over his hand, wincing as he pulled it back. A pocky box. It felt like it was still full. He looked back at the tiny donuts with a grimace, like he was apologising to them for the uninvited guest. Should I… It’s such a waste to just throw it out. I don’t want to just hand this to a student either… He sighed, looking back at the box. He pulled it out of his bag and sat it on top of his laptop with the book so that when he moved it over to the desk he didn’t have to hold onto it. He set both of the smaller items aside when he opened the computer and set to work, deciding that he would eat the last box himself. 

When it came time that he was to take a small break, he opened the packet. He took out one stick initially to eat, but then he remembered that Adachi had taken out five just to mess with him. I mean… It would probably be quicker… And it was silly. He thought on it for only another second before he piled them into his hand. He took a chomp out of the top and covered his mouth, trying not to laugh from how horrifying that must have looked to someone else.  He tried not to choke when he heard a knock on the door, one that he was familiar with. Oh no. Maruki fought off the biscuit dust, clearing his mouth but he was left to panic about what to do with the rest of the sticks in his hand. 

It was all too late when Ren Amamiya opened the door, just slightly - like he was just checking if Maruki was really there. Maruki brought his fist up to his mouth, suddenly wishing that his Persona’s ability was the power to vanish. He saw his shadow under the desk swirling about. I am not wiping someone’s memory just because they saw me do something embarrassing! When that thought crossed his mind, his shadow died down and reformed into the shape of his silhouette. I’ll just… Throw these out. He swept the box and the packet into the bin next to the desk, then dropped the pocky sticks inside after them. 

“Amamiya, it’s nice to see you.” Maruki smiled awkwardly, standing up from his desk. He shut his laptop carefully before he gestured to the plush seats to let Ren sit down first. It’s hard to describe his expression right now - it just looks like he’s trying not to laugh at me. After Ren sat down, Maruki sat across from him. 

“Yeah, nice to see you too. Actually, I have a question - if I gave you a Kit Kat, would you eat it the same way? I don’t blame you for being efficient.” Ren smiled, joking with him. Maruki leaned his head down to sigh, his smile relaxing now that he saw that Ren was in the mood to joke with him. 

“No, I hope not. I saw a friend of mine do it and wanted to see what he was on about…” Maruki paused for a moment after he said that. Though by the time ‘friend’ had slipped out of his mouth he had already noticed, but he kept his smile and posture to keep his act together. It doesn’t matter, Amamiya won’t know who it is anyway. It’s okay. You don’t need to tell him everything.

“That’s a shame, I thought we could have been partners in crime for a second.” Ren shrugged. Partners in crime. That’s a funny way of putting that. Maruki laughed a little, shaking his head. 

“I’m afraid not, you’ll have to find someone else unfortunately. Oh, but since it is the first- ish ,” Maruki raised his tone there, questioning it for a moment when he realised that it wasn’t actually the first day of school. “Day of the semester, I wasn’t going to go too far into any mental training. Unless you would prefer that we just got back to it? I’m not sure where you feel you’re at right now.” Maruki held his hands together. Right. I’m sure I still have something else I can teach him if he does end up wanting some practice, but overall I wanted to be more chatty. I want to know if I can start involving him more in my research. Ren stayed quiet for a moment, thinking it over before shrugging. 

“A mix of both is fine with me. You make it sound like you have something you want to talk about.” Ren looked back over to Maruki, resting his hands in his lap as he spoke. Amamiya is pretty smart. And he’s hardworking, wanting to get back into psychological practice as soon as he’s back at school? When I was his age, I probably would have curled over at the mention after a holiday as long as that.

“Right, okay. You would be correct,” Maruki nodded as he thought about his next words carefully. “I keep thinking about my research. I’ve actually been thinking about it a lot, even when I was on holiday with everyone else. I mean, naturally, if my clients aren’t at school, there’s no one to talk to.” Maruki hummed quietly. 

“Anyway,  I was thinking about ‘internal’ and ‘external’ realities again. How some people have a different internal wish than what they get in reality - There was someone I spoke to just recently who seemed to fall in line with that gap.” Maruki looked down at his hands, gently squeezing them together as he kept himself calm. We haven’t spoken since last month. I wish he would just…

“He seems to have all of these psychological wounds. It becomes difficult to talk to him sometimes, he’s the friend I mentioned earlier. Oh, and sorry that this has become a bit personal, but…” Maruki took a slow breath in. 

“I feel like I’ve asked a similar question before. If your friend was going through a similar experience and you had the power to just snap your fingers and end their struggle, would you?” Maruki looked over to Ren again, who brought his hand up to his chin to think. Maruki smiled a little, relaxing as he remembered where he was and what he should be doing right now. Ren sat back, looking Maruki up and down before he responded. 

“Yeah, I think you have, just differently. I guess… My answer is no.” Ren shook his head, leaning over to take one of the Donut-Worries out of the bowl. They’re yours to keep. Maruki waited for his explanation. 

“That’s for them to work out. Like… Yeah, I know your job is to point people in the right direction, but how they deal with that pain is up to them.” Ren smiled and shrugged, like what he said was normal for a teenager. What do you mean?... Maruki tilted his head to the side slightly as he broke down Ren’s response in his head. 

“I understand your point of view. However, logically… It feels like it makes more sense to press that magical button, right?” Maruki smiled awkwardly.. He is just a kid. And if he really is a Phantom Thief, maybe he has some alternative way of thinking that I just can’t understand right now. I mean, he would be very much a justice-seeking person if he was. If he is.  

“Yeah, but also consider: A physical wound, like a cut, has pain for a reason. It’s telling the brain that there’s something wrong there, right? It stops hurting when it heals.” Ren blinked a few times, seemingly confused by Maruki’s rebuttal. I mean…

“You are right. Maybe if I phrase it this way - if I could heal those wounds straight away… I would.” Maruki nodded, happy that he was able to clear up his stance. That seemed to click with Ren as he shifted in his seat for a moment. 

“I guess so. If a cut could just heal up quickly, I’d be pretty happy too.” Ren shrugged again with a smile. I’m glad you think so. That feels reaffirming right now, considering everything going on… Maruki beamed quietly. 

“Oh, that does remind me - That friend and I had gotten into talks about that Medjed business a month ago. Do you feel alright?” Maruki tried not to show too much excitement as he found a way he could mention it without directly mentioning The Phantom Thieves. Ren seemed confused and stayed quiet, which prompted Maruki to add on. 

“I mean, about being hacked. The news was really active about it, saying how some people might get targeted. All of this online stuff is really hard for me to follow…” Maruki played into his age for a moment. I mean, I remember when big bulky computers were at the peak of their popularity. I remember visiting a friend of mine in primary school and watching him use the computer. He’d be stuck using the manual all the time to remember different commands to do stuff. It’s crazy how fast everything has developed by now, huh? I just point and click and things happen. Ren’s face scrunched into a smile, amused at the reminder that Maruki was a middle-aged man. 

“Oh yeah. It was no big deal, don’t worry about it. People were talking about how that hacker group and some other rebel group were butting heads - no one else was involved, thankfully. Takamaki can read English so we were able to keep up to date together.” Ren shrugged, resting his hands on the chair now that he was done talking. That does make sense. And you mentioned Takamaki… Who Adachi also managed to profile as a Phantom Thief. By no means is this entirely solid, but… I think I can trust you fully now, with a lot more.

“Wow, Takamaki can read English? I wish I could read it myself, I kind of envy her!” Maruki smiled again, fully relaxed now that he felt like he had someone else that might be able to help him out. Of course, before he saw Ren as someone who could access cognitive worlds, but now that he knew that Ren was actively changing peoples’ hearts and helping them become better people and atoning for their crimes, there was - for the first time, relief. That Maruki wasn’t just chasing nothing, that there was a way to do this effectively and efficiently, even if it wasn’t a wide group of people. It was a relief to know that cognitive worlds did have a means of changing hearts, without needing to be in direct proximity to the subject. Perfect… This is amazing. Just remember to calm down. I don’t need another comment on my appearance or how I’m acting.

“She is amazing. Oh, so…” Ren trailed off, seemingly not sure how to bring up his question. Oh, the mental training!

“Shoot, the mental training - I’m sorry, I forgot again. I should have something super quick… Oh! Why not Cognitive Shuffling?” Maruki smiled, holding his hands together, more out of a relief that he could think of something so quickly. I really need to stop forgetting about these things. I feel so bad, like what Amamiya gets out of this means nothing to me - I’ve just been so distracted lately…

“Cognitive Shuffling is the common term for Serial Diverse Imaging, which is something that I think someone called Beaudoin developed,” Maruki stumbled over Beaudoin’s name. He realised that he might have pronounced that wrong and looked down at his lap, going over it quietly under his breath again. Bow-dwan… Is that right? He shook his head, saying the name again as close as he could manage before continuing on. “I’ve been lucky to find some articles in Japanese talking about it. To keep it simple, it thinks of thoughts as three different categories - One which keeps us awake, one which makes us drowsy, and one that is basically neutral, has no effect on sleep. The researcher developed a strategy that is counter-insomnolent, that makes us sleepy.” Maruki could practically see the page in his head as he talked about it, though he had really come across this strategy out of an accident in his search for other cognitive research. It fascinated me. I keep forgetting to use it… But there’s a few different studies that say that it works just as well as some other well-established strategies. A well-rested Phantom Thief is better than a sleepy one! He beamed quietly, allowing himself a moment of excitement and pride for Ren.

“The trick is to think of neutral words while you’re trying to rest. There’s probably some audio lists online if you have trouble doing that by yourself, but there’s also another idea where you use hiragana as a guide to think of things. About every eight seconds or eight heartbeats, you think of a random word and think on it for a little bit before moving to the next. These thoughts have the tendency to work the mind into a state where it believes it’s safe to sleep, I mean - your mind is always scanning for threats, afterall.” Maruki nodded along, wondering if he’d covered everything he needed for Ren to understand it. Ren’s eyes wandered back to the donut bowl as he seemed to think on it for a moment. Hopefully that wasn’t too much to dump on you so close to the end of the session - let alone, in your first week back at school. 

“I hope that’s useful for you.” Maruki added. Ren nodded, smiling again when he looked back at Maruki. 

“Yeah. Thanks, Mister Maruki. Well,” Ren stood up, grabbing his phone to check something briefly before he gave Maruki a wave. “See ya. I’ll be headed home now.” You don’t have to tell me where you’re going. Or maybe you’re building an alibi? Maruki tried not to be too happy about that either. I feel like I’m in a secret little society now, it’s fun.

“Alright, please be safe on your way home. Thank you for talking with me, I really appreciate it.” Maruki stood as well, leaning just a little to peak over the chair and see where he’d left his bag. It’s behind, like always. He looked back at Ren to see him off, then he made the effort to gather all of his things and set them inside. He looked awkwardly at the snack bowl for a moment. I don’t think I could keep carrying those around. I think if I leave it here, it should be fine… Oh, I hope the nurse doesn’t mind it. I don’t think I’m particularly promoting physical health with these… But just consider it a trade off for mental health for the moment.  

He paused for a moment before he checked the time himself. Yes, it is time to go home… No one else came to see me today. I must have been so caught up with my paper that I didn’t notice. Maruki set his laptop and the book inside his bag and tucked the strap onto his shoulder. Weird. I guess a lot of my days lately have been like this, though… He clenched his teeth when he remembered the reason why he was beginning to pass the days that fast. It wasn’t frustration that drove him away from thinking about it, it was a kind of grief. A reluctance to think about how he might have driven a friend away. 

Maruki clocked out once he found the faculty office again, having to navigate the flocks of students moving or remaining still in the hallways. I still don’t get what he meant. He smiled politely to some of the teachers and said his goodbyes for the day as he walked off, finally hitting the fresh air from outside. What was he talking about? Winning people over with roses and gifts, was it? That part remained starkly in his head. Everything else by now had become a blur of events, though he felt guilty about this too. He knew it was something to do with his ability, and that Adachi didn’t like it, and then the ‘roses and gifts’.  

He stopped when the air was only sweeping across the ground, in the train station. The wind tended to do that once it was caught underground like that, otherwise gusts of it were generated every time a train was about to show up. He tried to keep out of the way of other people who seemed to be busily walking elsewhere, mainly students. Let’s not think too deeply about that… Maruki looked over the crowd, being that he was taller than most of the kids around. Oh, Amamiya, Takamaki, Sakamoto and even Niijima had started to join them recently. He looked briefly at the group before focussing ahead again. I hope they’re having a nice day, at least. That they had a nice time off. He felt the wind pick up again and relaxed, knowing that the next train was going to arrive soon. 

When it pulled up all of the students packed tightly together inside the carriages. When Maruki noticed this, he decided to wait for the next train over. 

Counselling Notes: Ren Amamiya, Friday 2nd 20XX

There was nothing too serious today, it was just me talking about my usual things again. I wanted to see how Amamiya would fare with the matters of my research, and I have confidence in this pathway forward. 

After verifying some matters that needed personal assessment, I believe that Amamiya should be capable of talking about more academic matters. I’d like to bring these up in the next meeting with him. 

Amamiya seemed stable and flexible, as he usually appears. He mentioned that he keeps up to date with the news, which shows his care for current matters and a keenness to understand the world around him. As previously stated, Amamiya is a bright student with the ability to keep a steady mind even under intense situations - it was a relief to find that online media did not seem to affect him. His mental health does not seem to have declined since the last meeting. Overall, there was little to touch upon, like usual.

Chapter Text

Maruki sat silently in the room, typing away. His eyes flicked to the time every moment that he had hesitation in his writing, like he was consulting it for the next few words. 2:47. 2:48. His eyes curled downward, deciding now to notice the little details in the cracks of his keyboard. The paint on this key is fading. There’s a hair stuck here - gross. He used the edge of his thumb to pick it out, brushing it away as he dug the rest of his nails under the key caps. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6… Even that got boring at one stage. 

He sighed quietly and forced himself to work again, but when he touched the next four keys his brain went completely quiet. Nothingness. He looked up at the physical clock in the room. 2:49… 2:50. Maruki ran his fingers under his chin, stopping them at one point before he came to rest his head upon the rest of his palm. His eyes wandered from the clock, which kindly ticked for his company, to the corner of the room where the security camera sat. It too was lifeless, no hint of red light even so much as blinking his way as he stared into the void. It got to a stage where he thought maybe he had seen something move out of the corner of his eye and the logic in his thoughts led him to believe that maybe a shadow flickered, just for a moment, under the door. As such, his eyes landed there and he waited. He could no longer accurately tell what the time was without looking at it, but he didn’t dare to until it felt like a year had passed. 

He sighed, sinking down into his chair as he was forced to reflect on his actions. To my surprise, a jail definitely feels like a jail. It makes anyone miserable who steps inside. He stared at the roof, which didn’t so much as blink back. Are my glasses necessary right now? He felt their weight press into the space between his eyes, now that he had leaned back so far. It tickled for a moment, causing him to take them off. They were interesting to hold, with the smooth ridges and metal hinges, so he kept holding onto them. He took a slow breath in before sighing. 

I do have the option to leave… I just prefer to wait. Adachi could show up, and if I wasn’t here when he did decide to do so… I would be hurt, if it were me. He shut his eyes for a moment, a dull red showing now that the overhead light was scraping through. What was the argument about again? He tried to remember. It caused him some guilt that he couldn’t remember the specifics anymore, but he tried again. We were talking about Personas, somewhat. That’s something that I can remember vaguely… And then when I mentioned something, Adachi’s face changed. I can remember so clearly what he said, but when it comes to my own voice… I can’t remember it.  

Being unproductive felt like a death sentence. The inability to process numbers right now was not helping.  He remained still, ignoring those underlying calls to work. I said something about the training, that’s the only thing we were talking about with Personas. Then it clicked. Oh, I too would be pretty upset if I just suddenly announced that you needed fixing. His eyes opened, but immediately shut again as the light stabbed him again. He leaned down, burying his head under the desk so that the darkness could help him adjust. Ow. It felt like some of the rusted gears were beginning to move again, though. Maybe that was seen as another betrayal by Adachi. I had good intentions, but I didn’t state them correctly - it doesn’t matter what the end result is, if your surgeon pulled out a bone saw, I’d expect to see the patient run. He sighed, running a hand through his hair. 

All good surgeries need the proper dose of sedatives. He was a little surprised by that thought, but it sounded true enough. He relaxed, feeling a little less guilty now that he had convinced himself that it was an honest mistake. So long as everyone is happy in the end… So long as it’s a world that Rumi would be happy to be a part of, too. He sat up straight, letting his eyes adjust. So, now we don’t have to worry about it until Adachi comes back. He paused for a moment. I mean… I hope he does. It would be a bit problematic if someone with that much information just up and left. 

He looked back at the computer screen again. 2:59. He’ll be too late to join now if he doesn’t show up now. Maruki looked back at his glasses and sat them back on his face, seeing his own words become clearer now that he could actually see them. What would I do if that happened? That Adachi officially quit the program? I don’t think him having that information is trouble itself, it’s just… He remembered how Adachi was when they first met. He smiled awkwardly to himself as he recalled him holding the paper over his head, blackmailing him for more information. If there’s an opportunity to use it, he will. I would expect him to if he doesn’t think that what I provide will weigh out that opportunity. His heart sank as he stressed about it, but he decided that if he didn’t see Adachi by the end of today he would send him a letter to negotiate a resolution. 

And so he waited. 3:00. 3:01. 3:02. I’ll give you until 3:05… 3:03. He sighed quietly, looking back up at his documents, opening a new tab to begin working on that letter. 3:04. He began to type.

placeholder title

To: Adachi

From: Maruki

I sincerely apologise.

I’ll establish first that I was insensitive to your own needs and that I completely phrased everything wrong. I reflected on our argument and realised that, even if that’s the case, I

A shadow crawled underneath the door. Maruki immediately leaned his laptop screen down, not enough to close it but enough to be polite if someone came inside. 3:06. Now that what he wanted to happen was almost occuring, he wasn’t too sure how to feel or what to do. There was a fresh panic in his veins as his brain sped into overtime, trying to predict who it might be and if it was Adachi, what mood he might be in when he stepped inside. Oh no. I spent all of this time expecting the worst, and I found out something even worse can happen - that my old friend shows up and I have no plan at all.  

When he heard the doorknob turn, he stood up and walked around the side of the desk, suddenly having a boost of energy - he couldn’t tell if it was adrenaline or dopamine that made him move. He almost crashed into the warden Maeda, who he hadn’t expected to walk in first. He paused for a moment, trying not to stand over her foot when he looked down to look at her properly. Oh no. Maeda seemed surprised herself, sharply taking one step back with a quicker reaction time than Maruki. 

“Hold on, what’s up with you? Goodness, boy.” Maeda sighed, folding her arms. No Adachi? This is his time block. No one else is after this time block. Have you come to tell me… Maruki’s shoulders flattened, though when he realised how his disappointment must have shown he replaced it with a polite smile. 

“Oh, I’m so sorry, Maeda. I was just about to leave, so…” Maruki quickly came up with that excuse, which only seemed to confuse her more as Adachi curled his head around the corner to see what was going on. You! Maruki went through the ten hidden stages of grief, unable to keep up with the developments that were happening in front of him now. Wait, but Maeda never steps in front of a patient… Is it because of what happened last time?  

“Are you sure? It is halfway through your timeslot… You see what I mean, boy? You waste people’s time, you see the consequence.” Maeda turned to Adachi, seemingly annoyed on Maruki’s behalf. Oh, Adachi might have given her some trouble… Maruki smiled awkwardly, holding his hands together. All Adachi could do was give a polite smile to the warden and shrug.

“I’m sorry, it did take me a while to figure out where I left something. If the Doc has to leave, then there’s no reason for me to be here, right?” There was something else in his smile that Maruki wasn’t too sure about now. Spare me the smoke and mirrors… Maruki also smiled politely to Maeda. I don’t know why I feel frustrated. There’s so much going on now that I can’t list any particular thing as its cause…

“Oh, no, I could never turn down a patient. If Adachi is here now, I no longer have a reason to leave. I’m sorry for making this confusing, Miss Maeda.” Maruki took a step back to let them into the room. It was a little awkward when no one wanted to sit down, a triangle forming between each person who picked their own corner except for Maruki, stuck in the middle. I don’t know how much I could push the time back. I don’t get paid for this, naturally, because I don’t actually work for anyone like I claim I did… Adachi knows that, Maeda does not. Maruki looked over to Maeda, who folded her arms. 

“So, here’s the deal. Doctor, you’re already aware of some changes to your inventory, but what you aren’t aware of is the new system in place for your protection. For the sake of patient confidentiality, I’m still going to be outside the door, that’s not going to change. However, Adachi knows that the next time that he wants to break down and throw things around the room, he gets put in solitary confinement again.” Oh, that’s right. Maeda remembers it like that. Adachi seemed unphased by her wording, leading Maruki to realise that she must have already had discussions with him about it. I can tell we’re already going to talk about that…

“If he does it again after that, we’ll withdraw him from the program. Three strikes and you’re out, it’s that sort of thing.” At least I’ve reduced the severity of this action. It was going to be difficult to convince her that Adachi did nothing at all with the room in the state that it was in… I’m glad that I could manage this much. Maruki nodded for a moment, before tilting his head. Solitary confinement again. That’s psychological torture, isn’t it? He frowned.

“I’d really prefer it if no one went into solitary confinement, actually. Especially given the circumstances, I don’t think it was that severe…” Maruki’s eyes wandered to the ground when he noticed Adachi’s expression. That one’s hard to describe. His face barely changes when he’s smiling like that, putting on that act. 

“He’ll have to learn somehow. Just because it wasn’t directed to you doesn’t mean that it can’t be directed to someone else in the future. It’s still violent behaviour, and it’s not part of our wish for rehabilitation.” Maeda sighed, shaking her head. Rehabilitation… Maruki put his hands into his pockets, grabbing the seam allowance on the inside to mess with. 

“Right, I understand, Miss Maeda. Thank you.” I can’t change her mind without having to go through the entire prison. That’s not something I’m capable of doing right now… Maruki smiled a little again, though this felt a little harder to do now. 

“So long as you understand the rules. I don’t think your other inmates will give you a problem, though obviously we’ll cross that bridge when we get there. I’ll stop wasting your time now.” Maeda nodded to herself for a moment before excusing herself from the room, shutting the door when she left. And then the silence remained, only broken by the ticking clock. 

Adachi remained in the corner that he picked, leaning against the wall as he watched Maruki with what felt like judgement. Maruki smiled awkwardly and sat down, wondering if Adachi would follow him to the desk, but he didn’t. Of course, this is him saying that something needs to be fixed. After another moment, Adachi folded his arms. You’re as pleasant as a sunburn, Adachi. Maruki took a slow breath in before sighing. He wants an apology. That’s my only guess.

“I’m sorry for arguing with you the other day.” Maruki began as he watched Adachi tilt his head with what was clearly an exaggerated, surprised expression. I take it back. You’re as pleasant as a glass shard in the sand. Maruki took another slow breath in as he managed his frustration. You’re only upset because he’s not trying to talk to you or work anything out. That’s all. You don’t actually hate him, he’s just being difficult right now. You were actually happy that he decided to show up at all before.

“I realise that my misunderstanding caused you distress. Especially because of how I made it out like you needed fixing, you don’t.” Maruki added on, remembering bits and pieces of Adachi’s comments during the fight. Adachi leaned forward, bringing his fist to his chin in another exaggerated movement, like he was thinking about something. You’re as pleasant as a blue-ringed octopus, Adachi. He paused for a moment after that thought. At least octopi are cute while they bite.

“And not communicating my intentions with you sooner is my own fault. I should be more open about my thoughts in the future.” Maruki concluded, wondering if that was what Adachi wanted to hear. Adachi smiled again, though the polite aspect of his behaviour had already dissolved when the door shut. 

“I’m surprised that you could keep your brain cells together long enough to say all of that. Gold star, Doc!” Adachi came over to the desk, but he stood beside his chair. He refused to sit down. Adachi leaned on the table, curling one leg over the other as he grabbed the edge of the desk. 

“And what do we say when we make a really shitty mistake?” Adachi’s eyes widened, looking down at Maruki. I’m assuming the answer is…

“I won’t do it again?” Maruki smiled awkwardly again, unsure of that one. There was a moment of silence as Adachi stared, not saying anything at all. Was that not it? Maruki looked down at the desk like it would tell him what Adachi wanted.

“Good, you get an A for effort but a F for lying to me.” Adachi sighed, sitting down. Lying? Maruki’s brows furrowed as he looked back at Adachi again. Lying about what? I don’t think I said anything that I wasn’t honest about…

“You will do it again. That’s just how you are. I forgive you for that, but that doesn’t mean you can’t at least do better about it.” That felt overly direct. Adachi’s face remained flat as he said that, though as Maruki’s expression became more tired and downtrodden, Adachi’s mouth did curl into a smile. 

“You’re never going to do it. I accept that I overreacted, the way your Persona is… It’s got the strength of a dandelion. It probably would explode if I threw it.” Adachi laughed a little at the thought. Maruki could only sit, confused as Adachi seemed to become more and more forgiving the more he looked down on him. I mean, so long as he feels safer now, I’m fine with that thought.

“You look like you’ve learnt your lesson anyhow, Doc. If I had a camera I would have taken a photo - did you really miss me that much?” Adachi beamed. Oh great. Maruki shut his eyes, just needing a moment to process that statement. I get what he means. When Maeda walked in front of him, I nearly kicked her when I didn’t see her. I don’t know how I could begin to talk my way out of that embarrassment.  

“I did miss you. You’re the only person I’ve trusted with the information I’ve given you. No one else knows as much about my current predicament as you.” Maruki decided the best way to rip the bandaid was to be honest. He looked back at Adachi, who had frozen like it wasn’t the response he was expecting at all. I thought you could read me like a book. What happened? Maruki smiled, laughing a little when saw the shock in Adachi’s eyes. You didn’t believe in your own statement, did you?

“That’s logical, except for the fact I nearly knocked your lights out.” Adachi folded his arms, his surprise turning into irritation as he became more defensive. That’s true. And for a moment, I did think I might… Maruki smiled awkwardly as he thought about it. I did not process that at all after that happened. No wonder I kept avoiding those thoughts. But the Adachi before me now is… There was a chunk of distress released into his system now that he remembered how Adachi treated him. 

“That’s not an accurate statement of what happened,” Maruki grabbed onto the thought that made the most sense. “What you did was choke me out until help arrived. I find it weird that you didn’t do anything else, and you showed your hand to Maeda when she walked in.” If I point out what doesn’t make sense, I’ll feel better - we can keep talking and I don’t have to feel that fear for a moment. Adachi looked at the desk, seemingly unsure of how to answer that himself. 

“Well, if I injured you, that would move me from ‘common assault’ to ‘assault with bodily harm’, which would have increased the sentence I got. That is, if you could have just kept your mouth shut - If I knew you were just going to wipe her memory of it, I…” Adachi trailed off, needing some more time to think on it. I trust that he didn’t think I would do that, but the fact that this didn’t come into his reflection is interesting in itself.  

“It doesn’t matter, what’s done is done,” Adachi shook his head. It felt like he was moving on pretty quickly from that. “Solitary confinement isn’t fun but at least I wouldn’t have had to deal with anyone else for a day or two,” Adachi smiled, tilting his head as he spoke. “You should guess how long I was put into confinement for, how well did you think that went?” Adachi let his arms relax onto the chair. 

“A day? Isn’t that the minimum amount?” Maruki was confused on that part. Don’t tell me that they gave him a longer time there than that. Adachi shook his head, fueling Maruki’s dread before he spoke again. 

“About eight hours. By the time it was lights out for everyone else, they moved me back to my cell. Crazy how your brainwashing works, huh?” Adachi sighed. I don’t think I… Maruki paused for a moment. Oh, maybe I did by implying how little Adachi affected me. Eight hours is way nicer than I was expecting for a prison.

“I see. I’m glad about that, then.” Maruki smiled, his shoulders softening as he realised that he helped somewhat. Adachi shook his head again as he looked at the table. 

“Anyway, I used all of my free days to stay out of your therapy. The only reason I showed up today was to make sure they didn’t kick me out of the program for not attending.” Oh. Maruki’s smile dropped, realising that Adachi might have been forced to go and that he might not have actually wanted to be here, but that got cleared up pretty quickly by the look of amusement he had. He’s so cruel sometimes.

“I’m not kidding. I did choose to go, though. You only show up on Saturdays now, right? It’s not like I could have done this any earlier.” Adachi raised his hand to rest his face on it, propped up by the chair. You chose to show up… Maruki smiled a little, somehow those words warmed his heart. I’d still prefer not to be attacked like I have been, but I think the thought of you wanting to come back is as much of an apology as I can expect from you. I forgive you.

“I see. Thank you for wanting to be here, then. I’ll work to regain your trust.” Maruki held his hands together, resting them on the edge of the table. Adachi looked away as the words slipped out of his mouth straight away. 

“ That’s what you said last time. ” It was just a little quieter than Adachi would usually hold his voice at. There was a moment of silence for the death of that trust, leading Maruki’s eyes down to his hands as they squeezed together. Yes, I did say that last time. It was quiet for another moment more. 

“I’m sorry. I want to do the right thing but I get told that I’m pretty stubborn sometimes.” Maruki sighed, looking at Adachi properly. With his head tilted to the clock, he looked back at Maruki without so much as a blink. 

“Yep, I’d agree with that. You’ve got as much give as a brick wall when it comes to the shit you’ve really been burying your head in - hey, by the way. I remember that you said you let the other guys go. Does that mean your data’s been finalised?” Adachi made it fairly obvious that this was another thought that he’d had for a while. Maruki nodded gently, knowing what the next question might be. 

“Then how much time do we really have left? What happens when those other guys you’ve kept around are no longer needed?” Adachi was direct, which was way easier to deal with than trying to work on guesses and assumptions. Maruki looked at his laptop, thinking about that. That’s a good question. Maybe this also shows my own lack of reflection. I guess… If I didn’t keep the number I did now, the prison would question if keeping just one person for the experiment was worth it. I might have to argue that we still haven’t concluded what we needed from Adachi - which, I technically ceased our sessions together long ago.  

“I think… They’d cancel your sessions, if you were the only person left.” That feels a little bit sad. I mean, I’m not going to just sit here and go ‘why am I sad?’, I know the reason. I’ve made a friend, even if we’re on shaky terms sometimes. To lose someone I’ve built a connection with, even if just for a couple of months, is sad. It was quiet for another pause. 

“Right. Yeah, that’s logical.” Adachi repeated that word from before. I guess that our time remaining is an undefined metric. Maruki went to mention something else, but the familiar knock at the door stopped him. He let that breath go, smiling with a shrug. This is an awful note to leave this on. Adachi shook his head and stood up. 

“Yeah, well. If there’s a next week, I’ll probably see you then.” For some reason, there was a hint of agitation in his tone. Why? Maruki figured that it would be better not to point that out, given how sensitive the rest of their topics had been today. It would be better not to leave him with any other emotions right now.

“I’ll see you then, Adachi.” Maruki kept his smile, though that irritated note still kept with him as the usual leaving procedure played out before him. 

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 3rd 20XX

We finally spoke, a month later. I apologised to him like he wanted, and then he asked me about my research. 

I had to tell him that it was beginning to come to a close. 

I should figure out another way to stay in touch, preferably without using up his visiting hours… I’m not even sure how I could talk about the topic we usually do anymore if that happened, actually. If I visited him, I imagine there would be a guard on either side of the glass, so… There goes the privacy. 

I’ll work something out

Chapter Text

It was hard to tell exactly what to do for the next meeting. I mean, I obviously have to bring the books, right? Maruki went through the contents of his bag, making sure that everything was in order. I can’t bring lunch anymore… I keep forgetting to buy a new bento box, anyhow. He sat back for a moment, thinking about it again. Oh, my water bottle. It would be bad to be dehydrated again. He stood up and wandered into the kitchen, searching his cupboards for what he needed - he usually just got some apple juice and water from the vending machines while he was at the school, so it was in a corner wedged between his plates and bowls. There you are. 

Maruki tried not to hit his head as he stood back up, failing for a moment when his forehead caught on the handle to the cupboard. Ow. He held it as he sat the bottle inside the sink, hissing inward as the pain slowly faded. His hand found the tap and he filled the bottle up, rubbing his forehead until it relaxed. Jeez. Maybe I should have knelt down instead of leaning like I did… How did I even manage to do that? He looked down to the door to the cupboard again, imagining how that might have happened. How the door shut, how his forehead would have had to have been below the handle, and then not having the awareness to notice that he was too close when he stood back up. Maybe Adachi is right on some things. He sighed, shaking his head. 

When the water bottle was full, he tightened the lid up as tight as he could manage and set it in his bag. Please don’t leak. I do not have the money for a new laptop. He set it down carefully and took up his bag.  That should be everything, then… His mind wandered for a moment. Since I’ve sort of confirmed my suspicions of Amamiya… Should I come take a look at the cafe? He didn’t move, like he was trying to convince any onlooker that he was thinking about anything mundane. His eyes narrowed to the mattress, taking that thought seriously. 

“I should.” That word escaped his mouth, breaking his exterior as he relaxed. I mean, I should be more aware of what environment Amamiya lives in, just in case he needs anything. It sounds amazing to live in a cafe, though - or well, above it. He smiled to himself and continued on his way. I’ll come check it out after this, then.

Maruki could only be so surprised when Adachi showed up a couple of minutes earlier today. I mean, there’s no way you can be overly early, considering how your schedule also revolves around someone else - the warden. Still, you’ve never been early… Maruki watched as Adachi sat down quietly. Oh, I suppose it’s still awkward. He smiled awkwardly, and it got worse when he realised he’d forgotten to put the book on the table. 

“Hey Adachi, how’re you doing?” Maruki leaned down to grab his bag, shuffling through it. He found the other book that he was going to be reading more of later, with the white cover - but that wasn’t the thriller series he’d gotten for Adachi. He checked behind his own laptop and found the other two books, pulling them onto his lap as he fixed the orientation of items in his bag. I shouldn’t have done that, what if I bumped into something and the laptop broke? At least if the laptop was flat to the wall of the bag, it would survive five seconds longer… He looked back up over the table, only to be met with another unique expression. You seem so much more tired than you were before, Adachi. It took a bit of effort to keep those words inside his head. Maruki set both books onto the table, unable to remember now where Adachi was. 

“It’s fine. Do your research.” Adachi seemed to brush off those comments, taking the first book in the pair and flipping until he found the corner he’d bent. He pressed against the crease when he opened the fold, but it had been a long time since the book had been opened. The crease relaxed, but it didn’t fade like it usually did. This is weird. I thought Adachi would find the opportunity to at least make himself feel better, but he seems closed off. Maruki watched him for a moment before deciding to grab his laptop. I won’t force you to talk about anything. 

And so Maruki worked, though it was maths he despised he did it anyway. I feel like this would be easier to ignore without someone else in the room, so I’m a little bit glad I get to do this for a moment. He leaned down again to find the third book in his bag for reference. He sat it beside his laptop and flipped until he found a certain page, which was fairly recognisable by the blank space surrounding the equation he needed. Thank you for doing this work for me. I would probably die without your help. He smiled a little, joking with himself as he entered the information into the program he was using to calculate. I’d rather not be carrying what could be an expensive calculator with me everywhere I go just to do this. So… Four, and then… He couldn’t tell how quiet it was, or that Adachi had stopped reading for that moment. 

It was only when he’d felt like he’d lost track of the numbers that he took a break, flipping the book over to preserve the page that he was on. Adachi tilted his head to the side, clearly trying to read the title. 

“Oh, are you interested?” Maruki blinked a few times, trying to get the image of numbers out of his head so that he could speak to Adachi properly. Adachi sat up straight and placed his book down in the same manner. 

“I guess. It’s not like you to read, Doc.” Adachi smiled a little, shrugging as he moved back from the table. I mean, can you really tell that from what I’ve done this entire time? Maruki’s brows furrowed together as he tried to understand that conclusion. 

“I mean… I guess you’re right, in the sense of fiction. I feel like I keep up with research articles and other academic sources just fine, though. Oh - this is a reference for my research, by the way.” Maruki gestured to his book, smiling a little as he relaxed into the conversation. 

“It’s been helping me a lot, it’s often the backbone for a lot of research in my field.” He added, contemplating for a moment whether or not he should hand it over, or whether or not Adachi actually wanted to read it. After that brief debate, he turned the book around and pushed it toward Adachi so that he could pick it up if he wanted to. 

“Sounds boring then.” Adachi picked up the book anyway. So - is it or is it not boring? Maruki realised that Adachi might lose the page, so he went to speak up but found that Adachi had already folded the corner. No… The corner… Maruki’s shoulders sank. Finding a physical copy of this book was already difficult enough… It’s nonexistent online. Please don’t break it. Adachi seemed to stop on a page, though it was hard to tell what specifically he was looking at given how he was holding the book. 

“Weird… ‘Desires have the ability to become the physical manifestations of a person’s soul. Their shape and size varies depending on multiple factors, as listed in article 16. Desires, as I understand it, should not be inherently good or evil - they appear to be akin to a battery for which some cognitive worlds function on a theoretical level.’ Well, that seems like bullshit to me.” Adachi handed the book back, tilting the pages toward Maruki to grab it. What. He took the book gently, slowly turning it around to read the page. ‘ On Desires and Cognitive Generation’… I remember this. Maruki looked over to Adachi and shook his head.

“What do you mean?” Please don’t say anything that would actually fully refute this statement in the book, I don’t know what I would do if it turned out that I didn’t pay attention to anything contentious. Adachi smiled, shaking his head.

“I just wanted to see how you’d react. You weren’t joking when you said it was the main thing everyone used, huh?” Adachi laughed a little, kicking one leg over the other as he seemed to lighten back up. Well, I’m glad that you feel alright. Maruki laughed a little as well, though weakened by the heart attack he nearly had. 

“Though, I will give you something important. The TV world didn’t have anything that sounded like a ‘desire’ in it. Not that I found, anyway. Then again, I wasn’t really there when the kids worked everything out…” Adachi trailed off, like he was trying to remember something. Maruki looked down for a moment before lighting up again, causing an immediate reaction from Adachi. 

“No, keep your mouth shut, I don’t want to hear it.” Wow, that was sharp. Maruki smiled apologetically. I’ll keep my mouth shut, then… I just think it would be beneficial for both of us if I spoke to Narukami again. He looked down at the book again as Adachi worked his thoughts out. 

‘However, in unique conditions cognitive worlds have been found to exist without the presence of Desires. Often artificially made (May we never repeat our history. Do not test the nature of shadows), these cognitive worlds may experience collapse due to other reasons.’ Huh. If we just read further, our answers would have been solved. What’s this about ‘repeating history’, though? Maruki tilted his head at the book for a moment. It always feels like the author is consistently warning us about ‘testing shadows’, but how could someone ‘test’ a shadow anyway?

“Yeah… It feels like someone’s fried my brain, so I don’t think I can remember anything I want to.” Adachi sighed, giving up on it. Maruki frowned for a moment, feeling a sense of pity for him.

“I’m sorry to hear that. It has been some years since too, so there’s no need to strain yourself. Oh, but - the book does mention… About how some cognitive worlds can be manmade. How someone could have made the TV world is beyond me, though. You did mention gods previously…” Maruki’s voice became quieter as Adachi stared at him with a flat expression. Maybe he’s told me this before. Whoops. He looked at the desk for a moment before looking back at the book, flipping until he found the page with the corner tucked in. He tried to fix that corner, succeeding partially before he focussed on his work again. It was quiet for another couple of ticks of the clock in the room. Adachi almost went back to reading before Maruki spoke up, once he was done writing down the numbers he needed. 

“Do you remember how you profiled those Phantom Thieves back in July? It was a little while ago.” Maruki’s voice was a little quieter on this part, not much of a whisper - enough that Adachi paused for a moment before answering. 

“Yeah, did you ever find out if I was right?” Adachi picked his own book up and folded the page’s corner again before shutting it completely. He wants to talk more now… I think I can remember what I’ve got so far. Maruki shut his laptop before responding. 

“Sort of, but I won’t tell you who.” Maruki smiled, bringing his hands together as he thought about his meeting with Amamiya.

“At least you remembered.” Adachi sighed, letting Maruki go on. 

“Well, I brought up Medjed as naturally as I could manage. He seemed to have a weird reaction, knowing the details fairly well without me having to elaborate on anything. I know it’s not a hundred percent, but the way he answered made me feel like your thoughts were correct. He did mention reading the messages Medjed left in English with a friend of his, which also kind of confirmed at least two of three. I rarely see this guy without his other friend, though. They all frequently talk to each other, so I feel comfortable saying that all three of them may be Phantom Thieves.” Maruki beamed. I’m so proud of all of them, but I feel so terrible that they have to pick up the slack of the adults around them. I can never get too close, but I’ll support you from afar.

“So you were very helpful, thank you.” Maruki concluded, nodding to himself for a moment before registering Adachi’s reaction. It was a blank stare as his body went still. Adachi? He waited for a couple of seconds. Was it something I said?

“Honestly, it’s a puzzle as difficult as twisting a door knob, I don’t know why the police haven’t already figured it out.” Life came back into his eyes as he folded his arms over his chest. You’re now defensive. I’m not even sure what triggers this reaction from you… Maruki smiled awkwardly with a shrug. 

“We do have some insider knowledge. The police probably don’t believe in cognitive worlds, so it makes their search a little harder. Because we’re aware of the possibilities, it becomes easier to work inside that theory.” Maruki explained his thoughts.

“Because they’re stupid.” Adachi concluded. I mean… This kind of cognitive theory does bring with it some doubt if you’ve never experienced anything to do with it. I do understand where a regular person might come from. Maruki smiled a little regardless, shaking his head. 

“Knowledge of cognitive worlds will become more accessible the more research is published. Especially as it starts to play a bigger role in the medical field… I really want to see it, one day. I want to see my work help people. This is what I’ve been fighting for, for years. ” Maruki went quiet for a moment, thinking back to the first time his power activated. He looked at his hands, though he became uncomfortable with his own memories he knew he couldn’t turn a blind eye to them. Maybe it’s time for you to know.

“I’ve experienced what happens to someone who experiences an immense amount of trauma. I knew them before the incident happened. She was my - If you don’t mind me talking about this.” Maruki snapped out of it, looking at Adachi with a little bit of distress as he realised where this conversation was going. Adachi sighed, sitting back in his seat. 

“Go on, it’s not going to kill me.” Adachi made a brushing motion with his hand. Thank you. I know it must be strange to have a counsellor talk about this kind of thing… Maruki laughed a little at that darker thought. 

“Thanks. She was my fiancée. We were only about a day or two from getting married when her parents got caught in a home invasion. They didn’t make it, unfortunately - they were getting up in their years and the wounds her mother sustained left her in the E.R. for a few hours. It was awful to come back to. The ambulance flew by our car as we were coming back. There were some police at our house but the man who did it was already gone.” Maruki looked at the desk, still. He couldn’t tell how Adachi was taking this news, he couldn’t see his face. Just the edge of his vision where nothing was moving at all. 

“I think I remember testifying in court. Rumi couldn’t make it, she was kind of… She was in a catatonic depression after everything happened. She couldn’t respond to much of anything, when I visited her. She would have these moments where she would kind of look around the room, maybe stare out the window for a bit and watch the birds or the wind push some trees around, I don’t really know what she was looking at.” Maruki smiled a little again, though it was shaky - almost as shaky as his voice when he spoke. It was pretty hard to breathe, considering he was using so much of his energy to control his actions. To keep himself contained enough to be understood. 

“If something vaguely reminded her of the attack, she became inconsolable. The police couldn’t ask her questions, the doctors really kept them out - I appreciate their efforts. Even I would set her off sometimes, just mentioning little things that could be threaded back to it. I’d get these horrible migraines at the time, too. It’s about then that I learnt how to use my ability, and I…” Maruki trailed off, remembering how Rumi reacted afterwards. ‘Who are you?’  

“I rewrote her cognition. It was successful, overwhelmingly successful. She forgot who I was. She forgot what happened to her parents. Localised only to her, she believed that she’d always been sick - that she was going to go live with her grandparents soon, as they had already agreed to before. It was a lot to get used to.” Maruki stayed quiet after that. There was some relief that flooded his system, allowing himself enough energy to look up to Adachi. Maybe I spoke too long… He laughed a little again, smiling that tiny bit as he felt his silence. 

“She was happy after that. I hear she’s still living a peaceful life with her grandparents. I think that this was the best outcome I could have asked for… And I think about it a lot. I think about how this can help people. Maybe that’s a lot to ask for. Time after time, after time… It works. It has worked.” Maruki paused, looking back at Adachi again, who stared back at him. It was another sharp expression, only dulled by the atmosphere. 

“I had my research shut down by my old university. That’s why I’ve gone independent now. I’ve been called stubborn to my face and behind my back, but… This is what I want. I want to help people.” Maruki heard the knock at the door and knew that they had run out of time. He took this moment to take a slow breath inward, feeling the oxygen return to his lungs. Adachi stood up, not before giving his own words to Maruki.

“I’d like to see you try. Any good game needs stakes, Doc.” Adachi’s face didn’t change as he left. 

A game? Maruki looked at his desk, barely hearing anything that Maeda had to say now that she was, again, diligently stating the leaving procedure. A game. You always like to think like that… Fine. If our friendship is a game, tell me what the stakes are next time. I’ll match your bet. There was a kind of anger that lit him up, not one of betrayal or frustration but an absolution. There was a familiar feeling of warmth that grabbed at his heart and left his shadow swaying hypnotically on the floor. 

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 10th 20XX

Why did I bother to talk about anything at all? Why did I feel the need to talk about myself like that? He has the gall to call this all a game. I should remember who I’m speaking to. 

His information has been useful so far. I remain grateful for that. Please remember to talk about how we’re going to remain in contact next time, we could be cut off at any point. 

If this is a game, what are the stakes? I need to calm down and remain professional.

Chapter Text

It was difficult to let the moment go, all things considered. Maruki’s week consisted of more counselling sessions, speaking gently to students and the words of his paper being burnt into the back of his skull. 

Maruki smiled, letting his hands rest in his lap. The chairs in the nurse’s office gave him some physical comfort for his back, which was giving him some trouble after sitting in awkward positions on his mattress the previous night. He did his best to pay attention, knowing that his work revolved around meaningful conversations - becoming distracted right now would only make his client feel unwanted. Eiko, the girl in front of him, began to mess with her nails. 

“So, like… Sorry for just dropping in. I’m sure everyone’s coming in lately…” She smiled apologetically, running her fingers along the details of her nail polish. Oh, it’s textured. That must be so nice for you, I might just chip it if it were me. Maruki smiled, shaking his head as he snapped into focus. 

“Please, just because there’s more students coming in doesn’t mean that you can’t or shouldn’t when you’re feeling stressed. I actually had a client recently, who had trouble showing up even though-” Maruki paused for a moment. Don’t mention Adachi, do you have any awareness? He sat back and squeezed his hands together. Relax, please. Deep breaths, Maruki.

“Well, he had some trouble showing up, but that’s besides the point. Please don’t be afraid to drop by, or if I’m not in, let the office know and I’ll come by.” Maruki nodded, trying to exude warmth and care to hide the irritation he felt when he remembered how Adachi reacted the other day.

“Wow, seriously? Thanks a load, Mr. Maruki!” Eiko seemed to relax with that reassurance. “Makoto recommended you too, so like… I trust her.” Oh, Makoto Niijima? I’m actually glad to hear that.  

Maruki sat silently for the assembly, in a chair from the side of the gym. He held his arms, folded across his chest as he braced for the student’s chatter for when the assembly was going to be over. The staff were warned about this in the email we got before school started… I kind of already know how some of the students think about this.

And indeed, as the words ‘He only wished for everyone to be able to lead a normal school life, and because of that love’, it became hard to ignore the concern and repulsion from the crowd. Comments like ‘he was just covering things up’ and ‘was it really suicide?’ circled the air, but what stood out to him was one girl who said ‘do you think The Phantom Thieves did it?’ caused him to look over. He didn’t mean it, turning his head like that, but once he realised he looked back up to the vice principal. Shoot, Maruki. Pay attention. He sighed quietly, trying to ignore the chatter but it only got worse. He tried not to turn his head again as he looked over to the crowd, only really able to see Ryuji with his bright blonde hair and inability to follow the school uniform. 

It was subtle, but he could read the word ‘no’ from his mouth with an irritated look. I know it’s just the shock of the news. It will calm down eventually… It’s just horrible that The Phantom Thieves are being blamed for this like they are. He frowned a little, sighing slowly as he left that feeling alone. It’s a shame that there’s no easy way of differentiating ‘mental shutdowns’ from these ‘changes of heart’. It might get a little bit easier with my paper… He caught his mind trailing down into thoughts about Adachi again, which made him irritated again. If I ever get it finished. It’s getting done with or without him, so I don’t need to worry. He realised he’d missed his cue to stand with the rest of the faculty staff, so he did it with an awkward smile. At least this isn’t too out of place for me. I seem to be always bumping into things or missing my cues anyway.  

Maruki had a day off today. He spent it sitting at a public library, deciding that this might be the best way to go. He picked up his water bottle and tipped it to his mouth, only to realise that it was empty. He took a moment to wake up a little, placing the bottle down. He looked around to where he remembered the vending machines were, though that was through a wall or two from where he was. The library was still and quiet enough that he was conscious of his own noise, standing up from his chair to wander over. 

He made his way through the hallway, stopping behind another man who also wanted to buy something from the vending machine. Oh, this isn’t too bad. I remember back on my campus on the busier hours, there’d be three or more people in front of me for the vending machines. Maruki smiled a little, realising that he could see himself in the reflection of the glass, being that the lights inside the machine had gone out. Let’s look friendly, Takuto. There were a few moments of silence before a kerplunk from the machine. The man in front of him had his turn and he had to shield the light from reflecting on the glass to see what he wanted. When he moved away, next it was Maruki’s turn. He ended up having to do the same motion, bringing his arm up to see inside the machine. 

It turned out it was just a snack machine, which he had no way of knowing on his way inside the library earlier. He came face to face with a packet of pocky sticks, which didn’t immediately annoy him. Maruki shrugged, turned away from the machine and even took a couple of steps before the realisation hit him. Oh, you haunt me, don’t you? He tried not to break his smile, but inside he really just wanted to escape his own irritation. Can’t they just have apple juice, or something nice? Is it more expensive to have a drink machine? He took a slow breath in as he found his table in the main room of the library again, standing by his chair as he worked the energy out of his system. I should calm down… I should have just filled my water up like normal. It’s not the pocky’s fault… He laughed a little, as he darkly joked with himself in an attempt to make himself feel better. 

He came back inside the nurse’s office with his juice box, sighing quietly as he sat down at the desk. At least the school always stocks up. They have my coin so long as they have apple juice. Maruki decided to continue his break, deciding to read the news. I’m sure the school isn’t too picky about my search history… He hummed quietly as he gave it a second of thought before putting ‘The Phantom Thieves’ into his search bar. He scrolled through the hits, cracking the straw off of the juice box with his other hand. He didn’t find anything interesting on the first page, but the second page held a website called The Phantom Aficionados. He paused again to think about it, at least a little longer than he gave his previous thought. I mean… I do have an antivirus if it turns out to be a shady website. It’s got a curious name.

The Phantom Aficionados

Q: Are The Phantom Thieves Just? 

Yes: 83.3% [ ////////////////     ] No: 16.7%

Comments:

Anon: an apology isn’t enough.

Anon: let’s hear from the workers!

Anon: no more big bang burg, lmao

Anon: stop fucking around

[ View More? ]

Maruki paused, taking in the aesthetic of the website. Why does this look so familiar? He squinted, considering how bright the red was compared to the black on the website. Ah… Oh! An image of Mishima’s white shirt, glowing bright red before the screen brightness was turned down, sat in his mind. Mishima’s been on this website before, right? He thought about it again. Well… That’s not enough to just say that he’s seen this website, but… I don’t think I can remember any other website that’s as bright red as this. And I swear that this has happened multiple times now that the summer uniform’s in use now. He should really keep his phone screen brightness down too, unless he wants glasses like mine. He laughed a little at the thought. 

What’s all of this, though? Maruki clicked on the navigation panel, curious to see what else was on the website. Did this appear when Medjed started threatening them, or was I late to find this? He noticed there was a page called Polls so he clicked on that, finding a page where a graph of votes was shown. He froze for a moment. I thought The Phantom Thieves chose their targets as a group… Why is there a poll? He felt his heart drop in his chest as he wondered if he’d missed such an important detail. If they’re not choosing it as a group, do they feel pressured to act? He shook his head along with that feeling. No, that doesn’t feel right for some reason. Even if they aren’t in control of this website, it’s likely they’re aware of its existence… It also seems like that Big Bang Burger CEO’s hitting the top of the list. 

Maruki hummed quietly before going back through his history to find the home page. If they see it once in a while, I think it’s a good idea to give them some encouragement this way.

The Phantom Aficionados

Q: Are The Phantom Thieves Just? 

Yes: 83.4% [ ////////////////     ] No: 16.6%

Comments:

Anon: We’re with you, P.Thieves!

Anon: an apology isn’t enough.

Anon: let’s hear from the workers!

Anon: no more big bang burg, lmao

[ View More? ]

Maruki beamed quietly, happy to leave a comment. It would be a little funny if Mishima was a Phantom Thief and I had no clue about it. I mean, I never see him hanging out with anyone other than Amamiya and maybe Sakamoto… He shook his head. No, Adachi was fairly accurate when he… He suddenly wished he couldn’t hear his own thoughts. They clearly had no regard for his wishes this week. They’ve been really getting at me… He leaned onto the desk, wrapping his hands around the back of his head as he sighed, trying to clear his head.

Do I usually think about Adachi this much?... 

Maruki sighed, moving through the crowded streets with a black suit in tow. Protected by a plastic cover, he kept it tucked inside his arm as he remained stuck within the flock of people moving through the central street of Shibuya. Wow, this is busier than it usually is… He tried his best not to bump into anyone. I’m more relieved that it was only a couple of days before I got my suit back. I’m sure there’s been a lot of funerals lately… He frowned at that thought. Oh, that would be a lot more people experiencing grief, too… He managed to make it to the plaza before the train station, allowing him a moment to stay in the open air. 

The more I see the pain in this world, the more I want to help fix it. He looked down at his suit. Just like I’ve done before… But I can’t keep this up, seeing only one person at a time. His shoulders softened, though he was conscious that he might drop his bag if he let too much tension leave his arms. If Adachi- He couldn’t help his face, which scrunched into irritation - sort of like the suit insulted his family. Why am I so upset? Why does it keep having to come back? Am I mad that I’m thinking about him, or am I more angry over the fact I’ve been failing to avoid those thoughts? He let his face relax, though when he looked back up he could have sworn he saw some heads turn away at a convenient time. Ah… Whoops. Maybe my time here’s up…  

He laughed awkwardly, almost like an apology, though he couldn’t exactly give one. He made his way down to the trains, knowing that he’d have to get home soon anyway. What did he really do? His thoughts almost felt like a separate part of himself at this point, like a shadow playing the devil’s advocate. He acted like my ambitions were just a game. It’s probably just another defence of his… He sighed, looking up to the train screens for some colour. That doesn’t mean that it was appropriate. Just because there’s an explanation behind his reaction doesn’t mean that it hurt me any less. He briefly remembered the violence he’d experienced a month ago and chuckled lifelessly to himself in a poor attempt to lighten his mood, but it didn’t work. Honestly, am I selfish for choosing this to fret over compared to that?.. This is about Rumi. That seemed to bring some stability and determination with it. He didn’t need to fawn over me, but some acknowledgement of her pain would have been enough. 

These thoughts led him to the current day, where he sat at his desk with his laptop closed, watching the time. We need to talk about it. He can do whatever he wants, but this will be addressed. He can vent his frustration however he decides, but he will give respect to her name. Even with those thoughts, he jumped when he heard the knock at the door. It wasn’t that it scared him so much as it woke him up from the trance he’d left himself under. He was so focussed on the thought that he should speak to Adachi about it that he wasn’t actually sure what his plan was once he walked through the door. It was hard to act like nothing was wrong, though Adachi humoured him with a polite smile, keeping it even as he sat down and the door shut. 

“Hey Doc, you don’t look so good. I thought someone researching mental wounds would know how to fix his own.” Adachi laughed a little, and those words could have meant no harm if they weren’t so poorly placed. Maruki looked over to the clock again, taking a slow breath in and out. 

“You know… I don’t really consider myself as someone who needs that help. You do bring me nicely to my first point, though - Could you bear with another heavy conversation?” Maruki did his best to bring it up politely. Adachi hummed quietly to himself, sitting back as he looked Maruki over. 

“Take your shot. It’s not going to surprise me.” So you know. Maruki sighed, holding his hands together over the table. I didn’t really think about how I was going to approach this. I’ve been so busy dodging the thoughts that I didn’t allocate enough time to give myself a plan… Everything else I’ve done is so much more calculated - why do I feel like Adachi’s always got a card in his hand that I need?

“You might not have meant it, but when I brought up Rumi… It felt more like you were seeing the situation as a game, and it made me pretty upset. I don’t know if you were shocked, or…” Maruki trailed off, watching Adachi reach for the book. Seriously? He shut his eyes, needing a moment to relax. 

“Huh. I didn’t know that I came here to sympathise with you. I thought our collaboration was transactional.” Adachi took the book, or at least so far as Maruki could hear and assume. It’s not his fault. He doesn’t understand and his ability to regulate his emotions has always been off. It’s not his fault. Maruki looked back at Adachi, who gave him a look of judgement and confusion. 

“Doc, you’re pissed off that I’m not giving you the reaction you want. Would you like it now? How about,” Adachi set the book in his lap as he brought his fist up to his eye and twisted it, like he was wiping away tears. “ Aw, I’m so sorry about your little ex! It must be awful to suffer the consequences of your actions, huh? Honestly, you’re acting like she’s dead.” Adachi dropped the whiny voice he used to mock Maruki when he stated his opinion. That was pretty hard for him to hear. Maruki stood up, unable to help his reaction much at all outside of retaining the ability to keep his mouth shut. 

Adachi paused for a moment before grinning, keeping to his seat while he glared at him. That look says ‘try me’. Do not. You will not do anything you regret. A hissing noise came from his lips as Maruki breathed in, the fire in his chest dying without the fuel to feed it. Don’t do it, it’s not worth it. Breathe.

“ Please. Please don’t joke about that. Please don’t provoke me.” Maruki’s hands shook as he sat back down. I was just frustrated. It’s going to be okay. I know he’s just trying to get under my skin. Adachi watched him in silence for that little while, seeing how he shook and he waited until it stopped. 

“ Scary . You really are crazy, aren’t you?” Adachi laughed, like it meant nothing to him at all. All Maruki could handle was an empty laugh back, a misplaced offering of politeness - as though they were strangers once again. I’m crazy? I feel like I might be going crazy with you in the room. Maruki ran a hand through his hair, looking over the desk in his attempt to relax. 

“What was that about a transactional friendship?” Maruki shook his head, deciding to grab anything he could to keep himself in conversation that wouldn’t kill him to participate in. Adachi’s brows furrowed for a second before he gave him a flat look instead.

“Oh, did you really not realise or do you just not remember? What you get from me is information, and what I get from you is your research. That’s it. It’s not friendship , it’s a cut and dry give and take situation. Don’t wipe your rainbows and sunshine on me.” Adachi folded his arms, almost seeming bored now that they had moved on. I see, so that’s how you thought of this… Why do I think you’re lying? Maruki brought his hands together again to squeeze them tightly. 

“It started that way, but is that how it looks right now?” Maruki felt something click in his thumb, so he released it. It didn’t feel painful, but it wasn’t pleasant either. The sensation grounded him in an odd way, like he had to accept that he was physically present and aware of his own body. Adachi sat for a moment, as if considering his words, but his face grew more and more disgusted. 

“That’s the best response you can come up with? Doc, neither of us are here because we want to be. Would you like to know why I chose to take part in this program? It’s because I didn’t want to fucking work. Who the hell wants to make tables and shoes all day?” Adachi placed his hand flat against the table. 

“The fun part comes from the fact I still get paid to deal with you.” Adachi shook his head, taking his hand back. That’s not true at all. Yes, you do get paid to be here, but that doesn’t mean that… Maruki frowned, thinking about it. No, but wait.

“Then why did you act the way you did to begin with? It was my understanding that you did it for your own entertainment, when it would have been so much easier for you to act the part. When you showed me that you were getting your amusement that way, you had the opportunity to keep it at that, but you took it further. Maybe you just wanted to know what was going on, but once you found out that I wasn’t forthcoming with my experiments, what did you do?” Maruki’s brows furrowed in confusion. You stayed here, knowing how you didn’t like it. Why? If the only reason you wanted to stay was for a copy of my research, wouldn’t that have been a deal breaker? What about the time you told me you were so betrayed by my actions, reaching out to your friends without your permission? You could have left then too, but here you remain.  

To that, Adachi was quiet. And every time that it felt like you were opening up to me? Adachi turned to look at the clock. When you volunteered your own information to me, knowing you had the right to refuse? Adachi seemed to grind his teeth, his nose scrunching up from the glare he wore. Adachi, you dug your own hole. 

“Don’t give me that shit. You’re the only human interaction I get all day outside of getting marched around this stupid place!” He stood up. He doesn’t seem like he’s physically aggressive yet. Maruki did his best to prepare himself in case he did become violent, deciding that being caught off guard is what landed him in so much trouble last time. The shift in Maruki’s body from the anxious, closed off attitude to a boxy and prepared one is what made Adachi laugh, grabbing his face as he made little attempt to hold it back. 

“That’s great, that’s exactly what I wanted! Stay scared, Doc! It’s really about time you started remembering who I am. The only person in the whole facility who wants to talk to me and I’ve put the fear of hell in him!” The laugh was odd, almost forced. That’s not right. Maruki’s shoulders softened as he realised what Adachi was actually thinking, maybe for the first time in a while. You didn’t scare me - Okay, maybe a little bit. But I’m not actively afraid of you. Maruki stood up, suddenly determined. Adachi turned to him with a shaky smile and furrowed brow, which quickly turned to shock the closer he got. 

“Doc, what the fuck are you doing?” Adachi could only manage to take a step back before Maruki took his hands, carefully for just a moment as he brought one of them to his neck. Here. It’s a little weird, but this felt like the most logical, undeniable way that I could prove this. It’s two-fold in a way, part of it says that I’m not afraid of your past actions, and the other is to feel my heartbeat that… You know, isn’t my chest. His hand was cold, just for a moment.

“I’m not afraid of you. You’re overthinking this. You need,” Adachi ripped his hands away, holding them in the air once they were free like he had to process what just happened. He stuck them in his pockets, making a motion like he was wiping them. “To remember that I’ve also decided to stay here. I could have cancelled the program by now, but I didn’t. I could have let them add some time to your record, but I didn’t. I’m not afraid of you, I’m just aware that you have some moments. That’s all.” Maruki showed his hands, not wanting to freak Adachi out by being unpredictable. There. You can’t control how you feel, but you can control how you think. You’re the kind of person who always wants evidence. Here’s your proof. And in part, it seemed to work. 

Adachi frowned, scrunching his nose up again as he sat back down. Maruki smiled, taking this chance to also sit down. It was quiet for a little while after that, and that silence slowly seeped into Maruki and wore him down. Adachi? His smile slowly became awkward. He’s completely blank. It was true, Adachi’s expression almost grew stale as he stared at the book he knocked onto the ground. It was like he was debating on whether or not he should pick it up, but was weighing his options on how to do it without moving. 

“Sorry, Adachi. That was probably weird, huh?” Maruki laughed awkwardly, hoping that some conversation would help him come back to life, but he remained quiet. I don’t really understand what’s happening. 

“Adachi?” Maruki’s voice became gentler, sort of like he was trying to wake him up. He lowered his head a little, sheepishly as he ran out of ideas. Thankfully the familiar knock at the door broke Adachi out of that expression. Wow, that happened quickly. I don’t think he was trying to ignore me, I think he was just figuring out how he should react. Now that he’s been given an escape tool, that’s what he’s decided to do. Maruki smiled normally again, deciding not to question it. 

“Oh, there’s the door. Goodbye Adachi, I’ll see you next week.” But we still haven’t resolved the problem. Maruki thought about that quickly, but brushed it aside. I can think about it next week. I think this will be a problem going forward, it’s not going to fix itself in a couple of days… Even if it still bothers me, I’m kind of relieved seeing that he can have reactions like that where he really doesn’t know what to do.  

Then in the next moment, Adachi squinted at Maruki with another look of judgement before returning to the polite smile he always gave Maeda as she did her usual ritual of reciting the rules and what she was going to do. What’s that look for?! Hold on! Maruki had to hide his shock as he listened. 

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 17th 20XX

I tried to speak with Adachi about the incident in the previous session. Naturally it didn’t go very well at all, but I did at least make some progress in understanding him, I think??

He showed his concern in pushing people away, so I tried to prove to him that I wasn’t afraid of him. He did not take too kindly to that and seemed to shut down rather than fully relax. I’m worried that I scared him, somehow. I’m still confused on this point. 

I keep forgetting to bring up how we should stay in touch once the program is over / cancelled… And I still need him to apologise for reacting the way he did when he heard about Rumi. That seems like a tall order though, and it’s something I’ll likely have to work on. I do feel a little bit better though. 

Chapter Text

It was weirder the next time Maruki saw him. It felt like he had stepped through a portal once he opened the door because when Adachi came in, it was like looking into the past. A polite smile and wave, generally quiet even when he sat down and the privacy was guaranteed. He reached for the book and turned his chair toward the clock, tucking his head down to see its pages. That happened fast… Why do I feel like something’s wrong? Maruki smiled awkwardly, holding his hands together as he spoke up. 

“Hello, Adachi. How are you?...” His voice trailed off into the silence. Nothing. Nothing at all. It’s like he didn’t hear me, but he’s quite the actor… Maruki laced his fingers together, looking toward the shut screen of his laptop. Maybe he’ll warm up to me a little bit later? I know this is a defensive behaviour at least. Maybe something bad happened today and it’s thrown him off. That’s okay, you don’t need to tell me everything. Maruki opened his laptop, deciding that working was going to be his more productive option. The clock chimed in every so often, gently in the background. 

On Matters of The Heart - How Cognition Can Heal Psychological Wounds

Takuto Maruki - Independent Researcher 

Keywords: adaptation, cognitive world, collective consciousness, distortion, education, heart, legal, lens, medical, medicine,  P.C.L.,  psience, training, trauma response, treatment, (Leaving room for more here. Ordered alphabetically for ease of access.)

The human heart is a physical organ, capable of receiving wounds and recovering on its own, although it’s a critical part of the human body. With its suffering comes consequences, whether that means medical intervention or scar tissue building in the patient’s chest - despite any severity, our technology today tends to be capable of restoring the quality of life that patient may have had. So why do we refer to the human psyche as a ‘heart’ as well? The human ego, split across three different sections of the cognitive sphere, could be considered the ‘heart’ of the patient’s cognition. My research, like many others in this field, relies on Jungian Psychology for the groundwork that made it possible. I’d personally like to thank the authors of all of my reference materials before continuing forward, and I’d like to pay my respects to the future pioneers of Cognitive Psience. [please try to find that author’s name… it was published from tatsumi port island, go back to the bookstore you found it from please]

Maruki sighed, seeing his own personal notes. Shibusawa would know. I kind of miss his perspective… He frowned a little, trying to read his own words but it seemed more like a wall of shapes than a coherent message. I’m running out of time for ‘I wish’ statements. If my professor could just organise that time with me…  

He felt a spark of frustration and he decided to put it to rest, taking a peak over his laptop screen to see Adachi. His face had come to rest, blank and almost dead in appearance. At least he’s not forcing himself to look friendly. I’d very much rather see your true feelings. He stayed quiet and observed for a little while, barely catching the muscles in Adachi’s jaw flexing. It looks like he’s grinding his teeth again. Maruki frowned for a moment, before he looked up to meet his gaze. Oh, he’s looking at me. I probably should have noticed that first. Maruki smiled apologetically. I’m sorry for staring… Maybe I should say that out loud.

“Sorry, Adachi. I wanted to know how you were doing, but I didn’t want to interrupt you.” Is that a good reason? I just wanted a short break. If you’re not in the mood to talk, that’s okay. Maruki let his hands rest on the keyboard, unsure as to whether or not Adachi would speak to him at all. Adachi looked down at his book again, and it almost seemed like he’d gone back to ignoring him again. Even so, as soon as Maruki gave up on that hope, Adachi spoke up. 

“Yeah, right. I’m sure you didn’t.” Maruki looked over to him again, but his eyes were trained onto the page. They didn’t move, like he’d chosen a spot to stare at rather than deciding to read again. You do realise I can tell that you’re reading or not, right?... I mean, every other time you’ve managed to balance the book and the conversation well. Something must be really bothering you. Maruki took his laptop screen and gently shut it. I think I should do my job.

“If you don’t mind me asking… What’s wrong? You don’t have to tell me, of course - I would like to help if you’ll let me.” Maruki smiled a little, though that dropped for a moment when he saw the irritation in Adachi’s face. Of course, in your eyes you might see asking for help as a sign of weakness. I’m sorry to put you on the spot like that.  

“It’s nothing you want to hear, Doc.” It was such a short response, quick and programmed. Adachi finally began to read again, his eyes scanning the pages. He was much slower this time, seeming to re-read some sections. But I just offered…

“Adachi, it can’t be much worse than what we’ve already spoken about. I have a high tol-” Maruki was very quickly cut off by Adachi’s flat response.

“Rumi.” It was almost childish, like he had no way to construct a better attack than that. Maruki paused for a moment, trying to understand whether or not that was supposed to be vicious or if it was supposed to be an answer to Maruki’s question. When he guessed which one he was, all he could do was give Adachi the flattest look in return. Seriously? I don’t even get what you mean. 

“Oh, I think I understand - would you like to apologise for your behaviour that little while ago?” Maruki smiled again, though it was more strained. I should thank you for bringing it to one of the points I wanted to cover. It was quiet for another bit as Adachi squinted at Maruki.

“You know where I stand. You don’t have to be a bitch about it.” Something lit up in Adachi’s eyes as he sat up, acting as though he’d made a connection of some kind. I do know where you stand - You can keep your position and apologise at the same time. You’re free to have an opinion, you just don’t get to disrespect someone, my ex-fiancé, in front of me. Maruki folded his arms, sitting back in his chair. 

“You know, I’ve never once said your own worries were unwarranted or worthless. Why do you feel like you need to defend yourself by bringing me down with you?” Maruki sighed, watching Adachi turn to face him properly. Honestly. Why do you feel the need to constantly upset me? I can tell when you’re intentionally provoking me. Is this still part of your ‘entertainment’?

“No, wait. I’m exactly right.” Adachi smiled, a look of surprise and malice sprung into his eyes as he folded the page he was on. Pray tell… Maruki stayed quiet to let him continue. 

“You’re a bitch. You always have been - acting like one, at least. That’s why - no wonder I…” Adachi trailed off, his expression falling more into relief. What? Maruki furrowed his brows together as he tried to make sense of what Adachi was saying to him. I’ve always acted like that? I mean, I do recall you calling me that before… I still don’t get what you mean, though.

“Listen, Doc. Don’t worry about it, it doesn’t concern you anymore.” Adachi made a brushing motion with his hand, looking to the side for a moment as if he was trying to think of something else to talk about. What. Maruki brought his hand up to rub his cheek, letting his arms relax out of the knot he’d formed over his chest. I guess he doesn’t really want to talk about it. If he’s feeling better about it, I think everything’s fine, then?

“Okay? I’d really rather you not call me that, though. If at all. Please.” Maruki smiled awkwardly. I don’t want to know how other people react if you call them that. I tend to tolerate it because… You have done worse. It’s probably part of the less offensive things you’ve done to me.

“I’ll think about it.” Adachi hummed, looking back down to his book with a note of contemplation. Please don’t just say that and not do it. Maruki sighed again, letting both of his hands rest in his lap. It was quiet for another moment after that, leaving Maruki to think about what to mention next. Oh, contact details. I mean, I know I can just call the prison to do appointments once we stop the program… But how will he call me if he needs any help?

“Hey, so… If you don’t mind me bringing up the program’s end, briefly?” Maruki tilted his head to the side slightly, bringing one of his hands to the side of his leg in case he needed to grab for his bag. I’m thinking that the best way to do this is to give him some paper with my contact information. That way he has it for his own reference. Adachi looked back over to him, remaining silent so that he could continue. 

“I was thinking about my promise. You really wanted to see the paper once it was done, and it should be published toward the end of the year - unfortunately, the program does end in November, if I remember correctly. And, I mean - you don’t have access to your own phone, of course,” Maruki smiled awkwardly, realising how much he was dragging this out. I’m sorry, it’s been a long time since I’ve actually handed someone my phone number and not a chat ID. I think the last person to get it was… Actually, it was Shibusawa. Wow, I feel old. “And I don’t want to make it so that only I can get into contact with you. Would you like my phone number for later reference?” There. I could have just said that… Maruki laughed sheepishly, though when he turned his head up to see Adachi again he had that same blank stare, as if he’d done something wrong. Come on, what is it now?!  

“I don’t get why you actually take that at face value,” Adachi shook his head, sighing as life returned to his eyes. It’s because you threatened to leak that information to the guards, who would cancel the program if they found out I wasn’t honest. “I mean, aren’t you overestimating my interest and my ability to go find you in twenty years?” Because you threatened to cancel the program. Adachi brought his arms onto the table to rest, wrists tucked together.

“Sure, why not? Am I supposed to give you my hand to write on?” Adachi said that, but didn’t move his hands at all. Maruki paused for a moment, confused until he realised that he was also expecting some piece of paper. It’s sarcasm. Of course it is. He leaned down from his seat, searching through his bag for anything he could write on. I have something, surely… He frowned as he realised he always had a pen, but not a notebook. The only paper I have on me is the book I keep referencing… I don’t want to ruin it. Maruki sat back up straight, only holding the pen in his hand. 

“I’m sorry, I should have thought about that a little more. I’ll have to do it next time, right?” Maruki smiled apologetically, letting the pen sit on the table. Adachi sighed, looking between the pen and his book for a while before turning it to the last page. He brought his fingers as close as he could manage to the inner spine of the book and ripped back, though the edge became soft and uneven despite the effort. The colour drained out of Maruki’s face as he processed what had just happened. The book… Adachi shrugged, finally taking a moment to check both sides of the page to see if he’d lost any text. 

“It doesn’t matter that much to me. The page is blank anyway, see?” Adachi placed the page on the table. It was true that it had no text on either side, Maruki picked it up to check. It feels like such bad luck to do that… I don’t think I can change what’s happened, though. Maruki smiled awkwardly. 

“Oh, thanks…” At least this has enough room for Adachi to collect contacts if he needs to… I don’t need to stress out too much about this. Maruki took up the pen and wrote his full name, alongside his number. Here. I hope that’s legible. He left the page in the middle of the table for Adachi to take. 

It seemed like for a moment he read it, but then he turned his chair a little to one side. The paper caught the light, but it didn’t seem anything was clicking. What’s wrong? Is my writing really that bad? Maruki’s shoulders dropped for a moment, picking back up as Adachi suddenly stood. Is everything alright? Maruki went to speak that thought out loud, but he was interrupted when Adachi’s fingers curled around the bridge of his glasses. And then, the world was suddenly much blurrier without them.

“I’m sorry?” Maruki squinted, confused. I feel like this is a little childish now… Though out of a few things, he noticed that the boxy shape of his glasses sat on Adachi’s face as he held the paper up again. Wait a minute… Maruki went quiet, putting the pieces together. He can’t see properly. He needs glasses. Do our prescriptions even line up? Maruki looked down to his hand, which he could see a little clearer than the rest of the environment around him. 

“Oh, I see.” Maruki smiled, relaxing. So long as it helps you, I guess. I’m not sure why you wouldn’t be allowed to have glasses in the prison, though - don’t you need it for certain tasks? Adachi shook his head slightly, raising his hand to take the glasses off and held them out for Maruki to take again. 

“Do you?” At least I can tell that you’re smiling. Maruki laughed a little at the joke, picking his glasses up to set them back in place. That’s better. It was nice to think that they had something in common, even if it was something silly like that. 

“I can now… You’ve never mentioned that you needed glasses before, though.” Maruki let his hands rest on the table as Adachi sat back down. Maybe he’s just always worn contacts, and today was an unlucky day?

“Ah,” Adachi seemed to cringe a little when that was mentioned. “I do fine without them. Your name was unfamiliar… And your handwriting is shit. Not to mention, your prescription is stronger than I’ve had before.” Adachi sighed, his body relaxing as he answered. Well… Yeah, I thought they might be to begin with.

“Right. I still think it would be in your best interest to get glasses, or to ask for contacts at least. I really would have never guessed, you read so fast. Has reading been helping your eyesight?” Maruki tilted his head slightly. I heard somewhere that it’s supposed to help with some eyesight problems… That might just be the one that comes with age, though. 

“It hasn’t. I don’t want anything to help my eyesight. I’m fine with the way I see things.” Adachi shut him down, turning his head slightly when the usual knock came to tell them that their time was up. I mean… I can’t force him to wear corrective lenses. If he’s fine, maybe he is… Although, I wonder how he’s been seeing me this entire time? Maruki tried to imagine a version of himself, blurry and out of focus - though it was hard to guess exactly how bad Adachi’s eyesight was, other than the self-described ‘ not as bad as yours ’. I might have never known.

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 24th 20XX

I couldn’t get Adachi to apologise today. 

On the other hand, apparently he needs glasses???

I handed my number to him for future contact outside of the program. It’s what I’ve been meaning to do for a while, but some obvious obstacles have led me to forget about it from time to time. Now I’m more comfortable if the unfortunate case happens where the guards step in and end my counselling sessions early. 

I keep my promises.

Chapter Text

For a while, things remained the same. Every Saturday Maruki would come in and talk with his three remaining clients, which then dwindled to two. Eventually this left him with only Adachi remaining, leaving the pressure on to end the program. As he sat in the office he’d been using as a counsellor, a lot had been weighing on his mind. There’s been so much to consider. Yoshizawa’s stresses have been weirdly vacant, I even waited for our next counselling session and she mentioned what we spoke about earlier with Amamiya present. I was worried, so I’m glad she’s doing better… It does, however, lead me to three conclusions. Either she’s been recruited by The Phantom Thieves, had her heart changed, or… There’s something to my own abilities that I haven’t yet witnessed in the long term effects. I haven’t heard from Rumi in a few years now, but… In that case, doesn’t that just mean that everyone’s happier because of it?

That doesn’t even mention the fact that my old professor has finally agreed to see me in person, and as much as I don’t want to argue about time and place for him… Christmas Eve is a little bit inconvenient, but not out of my way. I want to show him what cognitive psience can do. I want to show him how beneficial this research is, that he just denied without a second thought. It doesn’t matter to me that it doesn’t get officially published in time, for me… This is more about proving that the evidence existed all along. With the information becoming more publicly available… Maruki’s train of thought halted when the knock he was expecting bounced around the room, almost cutting off the constant ticking of the clock. Oh, and my current issue…

Adachi stepped in through the door, the same as always. The polite smile for Maeda’s sake, and then a face that showed what Maruki hoped were his true emotions - at rest, neutral. Relaxed, maybe. Adachi took a seat and looked around the room for a moment, mainly keeping it to the table before he stared at Maruki directly. 

“Hey, Doc. What’s with that look?” If you’re in tune with the news as you claim you are, you might know a little bit already. Maruki’s shoulders softened as he smiled a little, weakly. 

“Sorry, I promise it’s not directed at you.” And one other problem has arrived - the blame that The Phantom Thieves are getting for the Big Bang Burger CEO’s murder. It’s so unfortunate, but I know how a change of heart works by now… At least, from my perspective and my understanding. Adachi kicked one leg over the other, showing that he was comfortable with the conversation. Maruki continued on. 

“I’ve got a lot on my mind. I think what you would be most interested to hear is about… I think his name is Kunikazu Okumura? He passed away recently.” Maruki held his hands together. Seeing everyone say horrible things about those kids is disheartening, to say the least. Adachi smiled a little, leaning onto his knee as he responded.

“That’s right, everyone’s talking about how The Phantom Thieves might have done it. It’s unfortunate, huh? It’s like everyone forgot how they work or something. How convenient.” Adachi seemed like he’d kept up with the information just fine. I’m relieved that he’s able to keep up with the news… But it is a little bit limited, relying on what the TV will broadcast.

“That’s kind of what I was thinking. The Phantom Thieves’ whole thing is correction, not elimination. If you look at their previous work, this becomes clear - though…” Maruki frowned, remembering the conference video. It was terrifying. I hope that they’re all okay… It’s terrible that I can’t just come out and say it, and offer my support.  

“It happened during an apology conference. Yeah, I see why people would be a bit nervous to support them now. I could guess that some people think that it was all leading up to this, building trust to turn it into fear.” Adachi sat up properly, letting his arm rest on the desk. That’s very much the opposite of their motives, though… Maruki looked down at his hands, taking a slow breath in. Speaking of which… I suppose that means that there’s someone directly against The Phantom Thieves’ actions now. There’s never been an accident like this before, so… Maybe there’s other people who can access that cognitive world. A sense of dread built in his chest. I have no idea who that could be. I think it adds up, with the mental shutdown cases building up as well, but… 

“Do you know anything about the mental shutdown cases?” Maruki brought himself back to focus. Adachi tilted his head slightly, his smile remaining as looked up to remember. 

“Yeah, I do recall. Several people across different industries went nuts and endangered the people around them, right? I think there was a bus… There were definitely trains. It’s been going on for years, right? Do you think that guy got mad that there was a group of kids doing better work than them?” Adachi laughed a little. Maybe? Maruki frowned as he thought. What were those incidents again? Adachi’s right about a bus and a train… Was there anything else? Maruki squinted, but he couldn’t really think of anything else off of the top of his head. Those people who committed those actions never died, though I only have those two cases to go off of. Whoever this is, they’re becoming more aggressive toward The Phantom Thieves now.

“I worry about that. I worry that there’s a lot that I don’t know.” Maruki went quiet for a moment after that, reflecting over each of the Phantom Thieves’ cases. I should look further into the mental shutdown incidents. I think I have most of what I could publicly access, but… 

“Yeah, you are a bit clueless. There must be a lot of people playing around in that cognitive world, huh? You must be jealous.” Adachi shrugged, seeming to lose interest once he was told he could be wrong. Jealous? Maruki paused for a moment as that word bounced around his head. I don’t think I’m jealous.  

“I think it’s more that I wish I could step inside myself. I don’t condemn others for being able to do so before me… If I could access that world, I think some of my own research would be a lot easier.” Maruki smiled a bit, shaking his head. I don’t want to be misinterpreted that way. It’s just saddening that people who do have that opportunity use it for these kinds of things instead. 

“Research makes up 80% of your brain, huh? Oh, that reminds me,” Adachi’s eyes lit up with the thought that occurred, but dulled as soon as he spoke again. “I’m the last guy you’ve got for the program, right? The other two finally had their problems fixed .” Yes, it was successful. Maruki sighed, knowing where Adachi was leading with this.

“That’s true… That doesn’t mean that I have to stop the program right now. They’d need to have a meeting with me first, and then I could probably come up with something.” Maruki went quiet as he realised how that sounded. I mean… The reason I’m doing all of this is because I’ve made a very nice friend - his reactions can be a bit over the top sometimes, but he’s one of the only people I trust. That’s why I’m trying so hard to keep this together… He brought a hand up to rub his cheek. Although, I’ve never been so stressed out about that fact. Maybe it’s because I know that I’ll never see him around in the street. He doesn’t have that freedom.

“Right. Yeah.” Adachi folded his arms over his chest, remaining quiet after that. His expression became hard to read, it almost seemed like he was annoyed or frustrated. He looks so solemn. Maybe he’s already given up the idea that it’s going to last much longer than this.  

“Even if it’s not at this capacity, I’d still visit you. I don’t want to get in the way of anyone else, though - I know that kind of time is limited, I don’t really know the rules.” Maruki laughed a little, though awkwardly as his sentence wound up longer than he’d hoped again. It’s sad to know that you’ll be seeing each other less. That’s why I’m upset, right? And I won’t be in direct contact anymore, so I might not ever be able to use my Actualisation… I never figured it out. Adachi shook his head. 

“It’s not as limited as you think it is. So long as my restriction level isn’t a low number by the time that goes down, I should be fine.” He watched Maruki’s reaction for a moment and saw how it didn’t change. I have no idea what a restriction level is. I think it mainly makes sense…  

“A restriction level is a measure of ‘how bad’ a prisoner’s been. It changes every six months. The higher it is, the worse their prospects for ‘rehabilitation’ is, and the more restrictions they face. Mine probably won’t change again until December, unless I really give them something to worry about.” Adachi sighed, looking up at the clock. Oh, the time? Maruki looked over as well. We still have a little while. 

“Well… What restriction level are you now?” Maruki looked back over to Adachi. It makes sense now that I think about it. Of course, prisoners have restriction levels. Was I limited to certain restriction levels when they agreed to the program? That part made him worry. I mean, everyone deserves help. I really wouldn’t be happy if they did that without letting me know about it.

“Two. I used to be a four in the beginning. Funny how a smile and a nod whenever the guard asks you to do something changes their perspective of you, even if you do the same shit. I miss being in a cell by myself, but oh well, I guess.” Adachi shrugged. Four? Out of what? Maruki thought about it for a moment before shaking his head slightly, deciding to move on. 

“I see. That’s good to know.” Maruki smiled properly, taking another moment to look back at his hands to think. I’m glad that I sorted that out. I feel a little relieved now… Oh, he might want to know about how the publishing’s going, too.  

“Oh, so… Are you still interested in the research? It’s a little hard for me to tell.” Maruki let his hands rest on his laptop. I don’t mind sharing my screen with you, there’s not much else to hide. Adachi’s eyes darted between the laptop and Maruki’s face for a short pause before shrugging again. 

“Doc, don’t act stupid.” Wait, I don’t know what that answer means. Maruki’s smile became awkward as he tried to guess, but when Adachi stood and moved his chair across the room, it became clearer what he meant. Maruki’s smile returned to its full warmth as he shuffled his seat across to let Adachi sit next to him. 

“Uh… Fine. Sure.” Adachi’s voice was much quieter, sort of like a thought that slipped through his mouth before he could catch it. He moved his chair a little closer, but sat right at the edge of the desk. Maruki opened his laptop screen to show what he was working on last, the document that contained his research. He turned his laptop a little so that Adachi could see it properly. 

“Here’s the research. It looks pretty dense in some areas right now, but this is the first time I’m fully editing something like this on my own, so it might look like that for a little bit longer.” Maruki scrolled briefly through, not really intending for Adachi to read it just yet. His eyes wandered around the screen and realised that some of his note documents were up, including Adachi’s. Oh, I did not think this through. He almost had a heart attack as he shut the app, deciding to bring up his emails instead with a shaky laugh. I hope that’s not weird. Whoops. Out of the corner of his eye he could barely see Adachi light up in response. Oh he really saw it, too. I should think of something else… 

“Oh, and- Okay, do you mind if you read this for a moment? Let me find it.” Maruki’s mind quickly bounced into another topic, grabbing the search bar to put in a particular name. It pulled up a bunch of old emails, from several years ago - but one thread that had been recently updated. 

“Sure, why not? I don’t know what you want me to say.” Adachi sighed, seeming to let him off of the hook. Okay, because I was not sure how I was going to talk about that. Maruki opened the thread and each email inside. 

Takuto Maruki <[email protected]>            Oct 1, 20XX, 9:53 AM

To Prof.Jitsu…▾

Hello there! I apologise for the inconvenience this email might cause you.

I am Takuto Maruki, a previous student from your cognitive theory class some years ago. I submitted a research proposal in regards to psychological connections to cognition, although this was denied for academic funding due to a lack of foundational evidence. 

As an elder in this field I respect you highly and, on a private matter, I wish to meet with you in regards to some questions I had. Would it be okay to organise a time with you?

Takuto Maruki <[email protected]>            Oct 9, 20XX, 7:25 PM

To Prof.Jitsu…▾

Hi again, sorry to bother you! 

As it has been a week, I worry you might not have seen this email. I apologise for my rudeness, but would it be possible to organise a meeting to speak with you? 

Takuto Maruki <[email protected]>            Oct 14, 20XX, 7:25 PM

To Prof.Jitsu…▾

Apologies! Could I organise an appointment with you?

Prof. Jitsuhara <[email protected]>         Oct 15, 20XX, 8:00 AM

To Takuto.Mar…▾

Hello, we apologise for the lack of response. Professor Jitsuhara is only available on the 24th of December, at 3:30 PM. We recognise this time may be inconvenient for you. 

Thank you for your inquiry! 

[Draft]

Hello 

that’s perfect! Thanks

Maruki folded his arms. Honestly, for someone who has a secretary… It really felt like I was being avoided. That only makes me more suspicious of you, rather than giving yourself much of a way to wriggle out. He sighed, letting his frustration go. 

“I’m not sure how to respond to something like that. It takes them… Two, nearly three weeks to get back to me, and now I feel like… No, that’s a bit pessimistic. It’s not his secretary’s fault, either.” Maruki shook his head, letting his hands rest in his lap as he untangled his arms. Adachi stared for a moment before he took the trackpad and scrolled through it again. I wonder what you’re thinking?

“They hate you over there, huh? I don’t blame them for being on edge, though. You didn’t explain why you wanted to see him, but then again - if you told him straight up, he’d probably just deny you, right?” Adachi smiled, leaving his hand over the trackpad. I thought so too. Maruki nodded along. 

“You act so nice, too. You’ve just got a good lid on your anger. I can’t envy you, though.” Adachi laughed a little as Maruki’s brows furrowed. What does that mean? 

“Oh, because I didn’t reply straight away?” Maruki tilted his head slightly, taking the opportunity to look at Adachi. He shook his head pretty quickly. 

“Nope. ‘You’re an elder in my field, oh how I adore you! I’m so lost, could you please guide me as I ask you questions?’ , it’s that line that seems forced. I know you won’t like your old professor, so you’re trying to butter him up to get him to open up the door. Old folks love that kind of thing, don’t they?” Adachi kicked one leg over the other, at least as best as he could manage with the limited space. Oh. I didn’t mean for that to come off as sarcastic or anything, I just thought that might be what he’d like to hear… Maruki smiled awkwardly, squeezing his hands together. I know you don’t seem bothered, but I don’t want you to think that I judge people like that behind their backs…

“I’m sorry. I didn’t realise that’s how it came off to you.” Maruki’s smile became more apologetic. I promise that it’s caused by an actual history between us, not just because of one petty thing. Adachi didn’t seem bothered, though. He seemed to be more confused about where that was coming from. 

“It’s not a bad kind of ugly. Your bark is so weak, no one’s actually going to notice or care.” Adachi looked over to him, pausing for a moment as he looked Maruki over. Oh. I see. It was quiet for a moment. What’s wrong? Maruki looked back to the computer, deciding to figure out a response. Adachi’s head turned as well, as far as he could tell. Oh, your hand’s still here.  

“Right. Well, I think I should respond to them now. It would be bad if they retracted that offer.” Maruki nodded, accepting Adachi’s words and moving on. Adachi’s hand moved from the keyboard, allowing Maruki to take the computer and sit it a little closer to him so that he could type properly. 

Takuto Maruki <[email protected]>            Oct 15, 20XX, 2:56 PM

To Prof.Jitsu…▾

Hi there! Thank you so much for your reply, I understand how hectic it must be for everyone. I understand that his schedule must be also really packed, and I fully accept the 24th of December as our appointment time. I appreciate that he would clear time on a holiday just to speak with me. Thank you again!

Maruki sighed, hitting send. There. And there’s email evidence of this conversation, so they can’t just sweep it under the rug. He let the laptop go, having his hands rest on his knees. Adachi hummed quietly before he took the edge of the computer. 

“So, you did actually want to show me your research, right?” I mean… Sort of? Some of it’s unfinished and generally unpolished, some pieces are still a mess from falling asleep on the keyboard. Maruki smiled awkwardly as he tried to figure out exactly what to say. 

“Oh, yes, sorry.” The other documents…! Maruki held his jaw together tightly as Adachi took control of the laptop, switching it back to the writing app that Maruki was using. I wish my laptop was a touch screen one. Then I could just tap with my finger… He squeezed his hands together, hoping that Adachi didn’t get too curious. It’s no big deal, if he does. I mean, I don’t think I’ve put anything private in there, right? Adachi brought it back to the first page of Maruki’s research paper and started to read. I already know what this says, so I’m not sure if I should be looking at him or the screen.  

“You’re looking nervous, Doc. What’s wrong?” A smile crept onto Adachi’s face as he moved the page down. I mean, I’m not hiding it from you. Maruki laughed sheepishly, deciding that where he’d placed his feet before was now uncomfortable and they needed to be relocated immediately. He shifted them around until he found a spot he liked them in. 

“I’ll be honest, I forgot those notes were still on the tab. I’m sorry, it must feel like another level of monitoring to you.” Maruki’s shoulders sank as he decided to be honest. Adachi hummed quietly, seeming to think on that response for a little bit. Then he hovered the mouse over his own document. 

“Oh, these? I trust my doctor to have necessary and professional notes. I trust that he didn’t turn it into a diary , right?” Please stop having fun with this. Adachi’s eyes curled upward with his malicious grin. This feels all too familiar, but somehow worse. Maruki laughed again, a bit forced this time as he grabbed the edge of his laptop. 

“And I trust my client to respect my own privacy… Please? ” Please don’t. I can’t remember what I write half of the time… Maruki slowly started to take the computer back. Adachi hummed for a moment, clearly exaggerating his actions as he tilted his head to look at him. 

“Oh, so the guards don’t get to see these notes? How interesting,” Adachi trailed off. It was another painful moment of waiting before he let the laptop go. “Well, my doctor is red enough in the face. I’ll stop tormenting you now.” Adachi laughed again, allowing Maruki to take the laptop back fully as he stood up. Like clockwork, as if he had predicted it, that knock came back on the door. I don’t get what you mean. Maruki brought a hand up to feel his face, which was indeed fairly warm. When did I?.. He blinked a few times, still processing everything that just happened. Adachi dragged his chair back to the correct placement in the room before turning around to wave at Maruki. 

“See ya, Doc. Make sure you only have the page you want me to see up next time.” Adachi beamed. Oh, he’s way too happy about this. Maruki sighed, letting him be. I mean… Anyone would be embarrassed, right? 

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Saturday 15th 20XX

Is there a way to password lock these documents??

Not much progress today

Chapter Text

The next time that Maruki sat at that desk, it felt like everything was so much slower than he expected. His brain was wide awake, the gears churning yet clinking and chipping slowly with the lack of oil. That oil was sleep. I feel like I’m so much closer to understanding everything. I just need to keep going… If I lose this thought now, it’ll be the death of me. Out came the laptop and his work resumed. Collective consciousness… If there’s a cognitive world for collective consciousness, doesn’t that mean that shadows, as Adachi had described in the TV world, would roam there too?  

He split his screen in half, allowing his document to become squished to one side as he opened his browser. He scrolled through his bookmarks, pulling out different news stories of The Phantom Thieves he’d collected over the year and continued the search topic that struck him in the middle of the night. The mental shutdown cases… If that person is targeting The Phantom Thieves, why? And why would they cause such suffering? It was silent, completely quiet in the room as he worked. He just couldn’t hear his own typing, the occasional beeping from his laptop begging for its charger, not even the clock which was hard to tune out at times. It was like it didn’t exist. 

There were quite a few incidents last year. There’ve been a lot this year too, with one of the more recent cases being a CEO of a rival company to Big Bang Burger. That happened just last month… Maruki squinted. It’s hard to gather them all in one place since it got very little coverage, and The Phantom Thief news seems to be interfering with it. But it’s there, some of these recent ones are food related. He didn’t quite recognise how his vision was blurring either. They were already targeting the food industry… I need to… Write this down…  

There was a kind of whirring sound in his ear. Not only that, but his cheek was burning hot, like he’d fallen asleep on a heater. Ouch… What the? Maruki squinted, sitting up carefully. His glasses gave up on sticking to his face, dropping down onto the keyboard again. To make matters worse, when his brain was done booting back up his laptop finally gave up on life. Oh! Wait, did I save?! His face fell into horror as he nearly headbutted Adachi to search through his bag. 

“Whoa, could you warn me next time? Do you usually thrash about when you wake up?” Adachi shifted back. I don’t get what you mean. Maruki brought his hand to his head, as if there was going to be some kind of button to switch the world from blurry to clear. Adachi sat close by, one leg crossed over the other like usual with a book in his other hand. Hold on, if Adachi’s here… His face darkened with the dread that followed next. I slept through a counselling session. I am actually the worst! Maruki paused for a moment as he looked over to Adachi properly. Wait a second.

“Hold on, for a moment…” Maruki’s words dragged out a little as his body caught up with being awake. He leaned down carefully to pick up his bag this time, rummaging through it to find the cord. He went by how things felt, rather than relying on his eyesight to do so - he’d forgotten his glasses even existed. Did Adachi move his chair over again? Unprompted? Maruki looked over to where Adachi was supposed to be. That’s odd. It feels like nothing’s making sense right now… He found the cord, at least. He stood up slowly, pushing his chair back a bit so that he could look for an electrical socket in the room. Usually my laptop doesn’t run out of battery here. He squinted in an attempt to see better. 

“Doc, you’re gonna want your glasses.” He heard those words, but he didn’t really process them. Even so, he did eventually find that there was no power outlet in the room. Maruki sighed, sitting back in his chair as he felt the energy to do anything else leave him. I think I remember what I was doing… I’m sure it saved, it does that automatically. I just wish I could keep going. Maruki stared at his laptop in defeat for a minute or so before he looked over to Adachi again. 

“So… Why are you over here? Oh - and I’m sorry for falling asleep. I’ve wasted our time…” Maruki smiled apologetically, taking a slow breath in as he tried to wake himself up properly. He reached out for his glasses and checked on them, vaguely remembering that they fell from his face. There’s no scratch or chip. I’m glad, I don’t have the money to replace the lens right now. Adachi sat the book down on the desk. 

“You’ve got other things to worry about. Why don’t you explain to me why you look like a zombie right now? Whoever resurrected you did a terrible job.” Adachi folded his arms, twisting his hand out of the knot to gesture to Maruki. Oh, you might be right. Maruki’s smile became sheepish as he looked back at the laptop. I don’t think I know how to explain what happened. He reached out again to his laptop to shut it, hanging his head in the human equivalent pose of a wet cat. It didn’t seem to help his situation, being that Adachi was giving him a blank stare. Yep, there’s no way out. We’re both just going to be silent until the session’s end, right? Maruki looked over to the clock and winced. I really wasted our time… I’m really sorry.  

“Research?” Maruki brought his hands into his lap to hold them together. He’s not glaring at me, but it sure does feel like he is. It definitely feels like detective mode is on for him. He squeezed his hands for a moment, turning his eyes back to the time again. It was quiet for another pause. And another after that. I thought he might at least ask questions, but he’s so quiet. He smiled awkwardly again and sighed. There’s no way out. He’s basically saying, ‘tell me now or waste our time further’. 

“A lot has been happening lately… One of the clients I have from that school came to me to talk about her current circumstances. I felt so awful for her, especially because… Uh,” Maruki looked over to Adachi quickly as he realised he was about to tell him information that he really shouldn’t know. He looked back at the time again, as if that would help him to avoid eye contact. “Well, now that I know there’s a connection between The Phantom Thieves’ cases and the mental shutdown incidents, I wanted to know what was going on. I realised that this might be out of your realm of knowledge, because you don’t have internet access - a lot of these mental shutdown cases happened last year as well, meaning they wouldn’t be broadcast on the TV.” Maruki began, bringing his eyes down to his laptop again. 

“Because of that, I went ahead and wrote the main details about each of The Phantom Thieves’ cases. That unfortunately took some time, even when I’ve been following them closely for a little while now. There’s been a lot of news coverage on them, and some details remain inconsistent between the reports outside of what the police officially disclosed - it seems like a lot of people have their own opinions and assumptions.” Maruki shut his eyes, deciding to give them a short rest. It felt like he was nearly fully awake now, especially as he had to recall everything that he was doing the other night. 

“I’d begun to do some of the mental shutdown cases, but because there’s so much less news coverage, it’s been hard to find. They get solved quickly and closed, and I mean - I think that makes sense. A lot of peoples’ lives were endangered or lost, in theory the police should react quickly to it and fix it. But it never gets fixed, there never seems to be a culprit assigned - of course, because they don’t know about cognitive worlds. It stuck out to me. Before I knew it, it was about six in the morning and I managed to get a little bit of sleep in…” Maruki rubbed his cheek, opening his eyes again as he reminded himself that he couldn’t get much more sleep than he already had. Whoops. I really feel like an old man, my mother would tell herself the same thing. ‘I’m just resting my eyes’, and then she would fall into another nap. Adachi still remained silent. Wait, do you think I’m holding back? Maruki laughed nervously as he realised that Adachi was demanding more information in that way. I feel like I’ve been talking for ages!

“Ah… Then I made breakfast… And then I came here. Albeit, breakfast took a little while longer. Then it became lunch. Not to mention, I slept through my alarm… And I forgot to charge my laptop, so it’s dead now. Oh, is my phone okay?” Maruki sat up straight quickly, realising that he’d forgotten to check. He felt the pockets in his pants, but realised that now that it was Autumn it was likely he put it in his coat. He took the coat off of the back of his chair and eventually found the phone, which he confirmed was around 50% power. That’s good then. Phew…

“Right. And that was worth losing sleep over. Doc, have I ever told you that you’re stupid? You’d be the kind of person to forget that.” Adachi sighed, allowing the irritation to come across on his face now. Maruki sighed again, his shoulders drooping. I know. I don’t know what I was going to do if I ended up being called into work today either. As soon as I started thinking about collective consciousness… He paused. Collective consciousness. Right, because of The Phantom Thieves and the mental shutdown cases. They seem to be done on an individual basis, which is the problem that I’m facing with my ability - forget Adachi’s quirks for a moment. He looked back at his laptop and frowned. There’s no way I’ll be charging it while I’m here. I feel like I’m so close to understanding it all, too.

“I’m sorry. You did mention how the TV world was like a collective consciousness before, right? Or did I make that connection…” Maruki sat back, thinking about that again. Adachi’s brows furrowed together. Okay, so I must have made that connection myself. Whoops.

“I was just thinking about this problem I’ve…” Maruki looked over to Adachi and tilted his head slightly. Will he see this as an attack? I mean, by now he’s said that it doesn’t affect him and never will, right? On that basis, Maruki decided to continue his sentence.

“I was just thinking about it. My ability is limited by my own reach. You’ll probably escape it forever, of course,” Maruki added, hoping it would bring Adachi some ease. Not that I won’t try and fix that issue, though. I want you to be happy. “I think…” He smiled as it clicked for him in his head. So that’s it. Of course, because fragments of the human ego become beings within certain cognitive worlds. If The Phantom Thieves have been using the cognitive world to ‘change hearts’, doesn’t that mean that they’re interacting with those fragments? Shadows have to be born from somewhere. That ego is unrestricted, meaning…

“Oh, never mind. I just remembered something else.” Maruki kept his own thoughts quiet. I’m sorry Adachi, but if you knew that information you might react negatively again. If I understand the process of shadows becoming Personas, you might be just out of my reach right now… But I will do it. Whatever you truly need will be yours. He tried to ignore that shadow out of the corner of his eye, tendrils slowly curling around the wheels of his chair. Oh, that might give me away… He kept his eyes on Adachi and brought his foot down to cover it. If it was anyone else, this would be fine. I just need to keep his attention while I calm down. He took a slow breath in.

“What were you doing while I was asleep? Did Miss Maeda notice at all?” Maruki tilted his head again. This is something I’m actually curious about. Adachi paused for a moment before he squinted at Maruki. Then he sighed, letting his face relax.

“Obviously she didn’t. That hag would have dragged me back if she did. You know what she’s like.” Adachi had a flat tone. I don’t think ‘hag’ is a fair term to use. Maruki frowned at that word. What did she do to you to deserve that?

“You know, I’ve noticed you have a problem with insulting women a lot. Even if it’s not exactly directed to a woman.” Maruki realised how he could have been more careful in saying what he did, but his mind was spread thin between his genuine thoughts and the ones he was using to keep Adachi occupied.

“What, hag is a problem now? She’s old! You aren’t seriously pulling me up on that , are you?” Adachi glared at him, folding his arms again. Yes, I am. Maruki also took the opportunity to fold his arms. I’m not going to budge, either. Adachi didn’t seem to like that, or the fact that Maruki stayed silent. 

“You’re joking. I’ve called you some terrible shit to your face, but as soon as it’s a woman , you want to suddenly stand up? Don’t you want to sit back and reflect on what kind of person got you into your situation in the first place?” It was like someone turned off all of the noise in Maruki’s head at once. Did I hear you right?  

“Please don’t say that. This is my own choice, everything I’m doing right now is because of my own decisions. It wouldn’t matter if she had been a man or not.” Maruki’s face darkened. I need to keep my feelings in check. Even so… I should have stayed quiet with my past. Clearly he’s just going to try and weaponise Rumi whenever he gets the chance. She doesn’t deserve that. Adachi froze, before his face twisted into something more judgemental. 

“What, you would marry a man? You know that’s not legal, right?” What? Maruki’s face cleared as he tried to figure out where Adachi took that from. Oh, ‘it wouldn’t matter if she was a man or not’. I guess I did imply that, huh? It threw him off enough that he couldn’t help but to find it a little funny. I guess he had no idea.  

“Yeah, I would. Gender doesn’t really matter to me… Though I wish we would catch up with other countries in the world.” Maruki tried to keep his amusement to himself. I don’t think this is going to change his perception of me too much. I just think his reaction is a little bit funny. It was like someone knocked the wind out of Adachi and left him without lungs. He looks a little like a fish out of water. And then there was nothing. His face relaxed and almost became more contemplative as he sat there. Oh? I was worried he might break down, but he actually seems fine.  

“Yeah… Ah, whatever. Sorry, or something.” Adachi shrugged, grabbing his book again to read. I think if I try to push him for a proper apology right now he might not be too receptive. I’m just glad he apologised at all. Maruki smiled, relaxing. At that stage his shadow began to slowly dissolve into his original silhouette. I mean, he rarely ever does.

“Thank you.” Maruki held his hands together as Adachi opened the book and searched for the page. Oh, you know… I’m pretty sure that our time is up. At least, it should be very soon. Maruki looked up at the clock again. In a couple of minutes. Adachi can read pretty fast, though. He sat still for a moment. Hey, Adachi never explained why he’d wheeled himself over here…  

Maruki turned to watch him quietly. Adachi kicked his foot as his eyes scanned the page, gently enough that the shaking barely moved the book at all. He’s almost finished this one, too. Maruki leaned down slightly to see the cover of the book. Oh, it’s the second one? Adachi turned away from him, just a little bit. Oh, sorry about that. Maruki sat up straight, smiling apologetically to him. Then he turned his attention to his laptop.

I can’t stop thinking about it, though… How everyone I seem to come across has these kinds of psychological wounds. Adachi reacts so defensively sometimes, it can be hard to get him to understand just how injured he is. Some people can deal with those wounds effectively, as they’ve been able to practise. Their parents, teachers in their lives, they might have been lucky to have some skills taught to them at an early age to manage those symptoms. The world, however, is unfair. No matter how many times they notice and patch themselves up, the world gives them another gash. That doesn’t even account for the people who collect these wounds and hold them over time, never truly noticing they’re there until they collapse. And these kinds of people, they refuse help sometimes or they don’t know how to ask for it. Maruki looked back at Adachi again, unable to help it. 

No one deserves to live a life where they are forced to carry those burdens. Even if they don’t recognise it themselves, I will help them see a world where they are happy. No matter how long it takes. He felt the lack of sleep eating away at his thoughts again, but the usual knock came from the door. I think I’m going to rest a little more when I get home. I think Adachi had a point… Maruki snapped back into focus, blinking a few times. I think I was spacing out.

Cognitive Report: Tohru Adachi Sunday 23rd 20XX

This report might not be too accurate, seeing as it’s been written a day later than it should have been. I was pretty tired, sorry future me!

There wasn’t too much development today either. I did get Adachi to apologise for some negative behaviours, which I think is an improvement over other weeks.

Chapter Text

This week he was better about his sleep. When Adachi stepped inside the room, Maruki was actually put together and attentive. Most importantly, he was awake. 

“Hey, Doc. Nice to see you conscious, it’s surprising to see you listen so fast.” Adachi sat down, reaching his hand out for the book. Yeah. Things keep happening… Maruki smiled, though wearily. Though, I think I’ve finished the majority of my research. The data’s done, all of the writing’s done too - it’s just editing it and making sure that everything makes sense. I feel much better, even if there’s still more work to be done. Besides, I believe I’ve spoken to all of the Phantom Thieves now… I know what everyone wants. I feel a bit of relief, securing everyone’s wishes. 

“Yeah, well, you know. I’ve been making sure to catch up on sleep, so nothing like that will happen again. Especially before Halloween, all of the kids have some kind of stress about that - what they’re going to wear to whose party, something they ordered still not having come in. Even if it’s little things, I don’t want to become unreliable.” Maruki nodded to himself, though a look of confusion came across Adachi’s face.

“Huh? What’re you talking about? Halloween…” Adachi trailed off, looking down at his book. What do you mean, ‘what am I talking about’? Maruki also became confused, tilting his head to the side slightly. 

“There were no Halloween parties when I was a kid. Why do I feel like everyone else is letting go?” Adachi sighed, shaking his head. That only seemed to confuse Maruki further. That’s funny, because we’re around the same age. There were definitely Halloween parties in my high school… And particularly in college. He thought about that for a moment before the dread set in. Oh no. Adachi’s never been invited to a Halloween party. That’s the only way he wouldn’t know they were going on, right? Then his heart sank. I’m sure Adachi was a good kid, too…

“I mean… The parties were pretty crazy at my university. I definitely didn’t have any parties in high school.” Maruki looked away as he said that, but he realised he made it way too obvious that he was lying. Adachi gave him a blank stare before sighing again, seeming to come to the same realisation that Maruki had a moment prior. I’m sorry, Adachi. If it helps, I would have brought you along…

“Ah, well… I was a really stupid kid. I came home drunk more times than I can count, you probably wouldn’t have liked those parties.” Maruki smiled awkwardly, bringing his hand up to rub the back of his neck. Those words seem to catch Adachi’s interest, though. 

“Seriously? You don’t seem like the type.” Adachi kicked one leg over the other as he spoke. I mean, I might not be too interested in that kind of thing now, but when I was younger that was one of the things I really looked forward to. Maruki’s smile became more genuine, letting his hands rest on the table. 

“My friends were part of the blame. I’m trying to think of a particular moment you might be interested in…” Maruki trailed off, having to think about all of the parties he’d been to. I was so awkward earlier on. By the time I was about to graduate, I’d stay later and later and see wilder things. He hummed quietly. 

“Oh, so this one was for our graduation, for my undergraduate course. It was really tame in the beginning, everyone was just happy to be graduating and everyone was pretty mellow before the alcohol really started to kick in. I don’t even remember a majority of what happened, but I vaguely remember someone saying ‘I’m going to go get food’, or something like that - And I was really interested, so me and a friend of mine joined along with a handful of people.” Maruki began, keeping his laugh down as he remembered the ending straight away. 

“So we’re a bunch of twenty-something year olds wandering the street like a circus, I remember one poor girl fell over and got her shoe stuck in a storm drain - We stopped to help her but I remember it was jammed in pretty tight. I remember we got to a Big Bang Burger and we’re all just politely waiting in line. We weren’t even particularly loud, but when we stepped back outside there’s two police officers just watching us from a distance.” Maruki held his fingers up to count. Adachi tilted his head, seemingly unsure of where this was heading. Just give me a little bit, the ending’s here.

“For some reason, that girl who had fallen over earlier, her idea was to run. What was crazier is that a lot of us followed - can you imagine this kid with his Mars Nuggets and his Black Hole Cola having to run through the streets, barely remembering where the house for the party was? It was so stupid, I don’t remember why I ran - I just know that I was unfortunately one of the slower ones, so at one stage I remember just blacking out. What do I do when I wake up in the morning in my college dorm? I wake up and find out that, in between those events, I stole a street sign? ” Maruki couldn’t help but to laugh, remembering how it was when he woke up that morning. 

“I was asleep on top of it, very terribly trying to hide it. What part of ‘run away from the police’ leads into ‘steal a sign’? I never understood what happened, I don’t think I even went back to the party.” Maruki grinned, shaking his head. Adachi smiled as well, brows furrowed. 

“It probably wouldn’t have even been that bad if the police caught you. When I was drumming up experience, I remember some nights in the city we’d come across pretty similar situations. Except the kids didn’t fucking run , what was your issue?” Adachi laughed, focussing on that aspect. Maruki beamed when he noticed how Adachi was laughing. His laugh is so cute!  

“I don’t know! When I was sober enough to recognise I’d stolen the sign, I walked around the streets with it in my bag until I found where I’d ripped it from. It was really awkward, waiting until no one could see me and trying to put it back. I didn’t want to be caught with it, but as you might know, signs are usually bolted in . What’s worse is that it was pretty close to my dorm, so it would be completely obvious that I took it. When I realised that I couldn’t put it back, I just leaned it against the pole and went to class the next day.” Maruki held his hands together. 

“I mean… There’s no law against public drunkenness. The worst the police could have done was say you were disturbing the peace or something and tell you to disperse. If you run, the police get the idea that you’re doing something suspicious and that’s when they want to chase after you. There must have been too many of you to keep up, though.” Adachi smiled, shrugging at that mention. I thought so too, otherwise I would have been caught. Shibusawa’s more active than me, he probably had no problem.

“Right? I wasn’t thinking clearly at all. If no one else had run, I probably would have stayed put myself. Oh, that raises a question - have you ever had to chase someone yourself? You said that you had to gather experience being a regular officer first, right?” Maruki brought his hands into his lap as he spoke, hoping that Adachi had a light hearted story instead of an overly serious one. Adachi beamed quietly as he looked down at his book, seeming to think about it for a little while.