Chapter Text
It was an exciting night for the hashira. This friday night, they were going to the theater to see the latest addition to Legendary’s Monsterverse-- Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire. The Hashira were all excited to visit their local theater, but none was more excited than…
“LET’S GET THIS SHOW ON THE ROAD, EVERYONE!!” Kyojuro Rengoku shouted through the halls. Kyojuro loved Godzilla. He had seen all thirty eight films, all nine shows, and played several games featuring the King of the Monsters. He was ecstatic to see this film!
“Do we have to wear these?...” Giyu Tomioka removed his hands from his ears. He was never really a fan of Godzilla. Urokodaki watched the older films, but they looked so…dumb. Worse yet, the Hashira were wearing matching Godzilla x Kong hoodies!
“ABSOLUTELY!!” Kyojuro grinned. “Now then, let’s get going!!”
“Okay, Sour Patch Kids? Check. Twizzlers? Check. Specialty Chocolate? Check.” Obanai Iguro counted off his list. Shockingly, he was excited for this film. He grew up with Rengoku, and they often watched Godzilla films together. He even got specialty themed chocolate bars from FYE!
“This feels wrong…” Gyomei Himejima noted. He was aware of Godzilla, but hadn’t seen (or heard) any of the films before. However, he did not think sneaking all these snacks in was a morally right thing to do, especially since he’d become a walking snack pack.
“Oh please, the theater workers don’t care!” Sanemi Shinazugawa puffed. He never really cared about Monster Flicks, but during the Tengen’s Monsterverse Marathon, he grew to enjoy the devastation caused by the Titans. Now he’d be seeing it in IMAX!!
“Alright, it’s stashed, everybody in!” Obanai patted Gyomei’s pocket, which crinkled with plastic wrapper, the trio boarding into the bus.
“Oh I’m so excited! Our first movie night!!” Mitsuri chimed. She was also aware of Godzilla, thanks to her time as Kyojuro’s apprentice, but she was more excited to see a movie with all her friends than anything!
“So why is this such a big deal?” Muichiro Tokito asked. He liked Godzilla when he was a lot younger, but he’d outgrown it a while ago. Nowadays, he just saw it as a cheap b-movie at best, much to the protest of…
“You kidding?!” Tengen Uzui scoffed. He too was a Godzilla fan, but a newer one. He preferred the newer films, especially the ones where Godzilla and another monster duked it out! He even hosted a marathon of all the Monsterverse films ahead of time.
“It is a good question…” Shinobu Kocho spoke up. Of the nine Hashira, she was probably the least excited. The movies peddled pseudo-science, showcased cheesy effects, and featured plenty of bad acting! How anyone could be so thrilled was beyond her.
“This is the newest film in a seventy year saga! How can you not be pumped?!” Tengen scoffed, before turning back to the driving wheel.
Kyojuro hopped into the shotgun,“Alright, let’s go!”
“You got it!” Tengen grinned, peeling out of their driveway, and hitting the road. It only took about five minutes for the others to realize their mistake.
“Why the hell did we let him drive?!” Sanemi shouted, gripping the seat in front of him for dear life.
“Because I’m the fastest!” Tengen grinned, paying no concern to how many red lights he drove through. Miraculously, the hashira arrived at the Theater without crashing the van, and began to chat excitedly.
“Oh I can’t wait to see Baby-Kong!” Mitsuri chimed excitedly.
“He did look cute…” Shinobu nodded in agreement.
“Isn’t there like an evil Kong or something too?” Sanemi asked, looking at the poster.
“Yeah, some new bad guy called Skar King.” Obanai nodded. “Looks like you, too.”
“Fuck off.”
“What are you most excited about, Muichiro?” Gyomei asked.
“I dunno.” Muichiro shrugged.
“Well, I’m excited for the rematch personally!” Kyojuro chimed.
“Me too! Even though it’s obvious who’s gonna win…” Tengen chuckled.
“Yep! It’s gonna be…”
“Gotta be…”
“Godzilla!” Tengen declared.
“King Kong!” Kyojuro shouted.
Tengen and Kyojuro spoke at the same time, then…silence.
“Uh,” Kyojuro chuckled awkwardly. “I think I misheard you, best buddy!”
“What? It’s obvious Godzilla is gonna win this one! He even has a flashy, new evolved form!”
“Maybe, But King Kong held his own against Godzilla, and now he has a mechanical gauntlet!”
“Ooh, the girls are fighting…” Sanemi mumbled.
Indeed, the Flame and Sound Hashira were at a crossroads, having a staredown with one another, until Obanai broke the silence. “Kyojuro, you’re the biggest Godzilla fan I know, you’ve gotta be joking.”
“This is true, but Kong’s spirit has proven time and time again to be unbreakable! Even if he lost his last fight with Godzilla, he won the movie!”
“But Godzilla is stronger!” Obanai puffed. “He leveled the city of Boston with a nuclear pulse, took on two MUTOs at the same time, and drilled a hole into the hollow earth with his atomic breath! And that’s just the monsterverse Goji, any other could destroy him in a heartbeat!”
“Right? Thank you.” Tengen smirked towards Kyojuro.
“I have to agree with Rengoku,” To everyone’s surprise, Shinobu got involved. “Apes are recognized as the superior species compared to reptiles.”
“He’s a dinosaur, get it right.” Obanai hissed. “And a super strong one at that!”
“I dunno,” Mitsuri debated, much to Obanai’s despair. “Robo-Godzilla really laid into him…”
“That’s because King Kong wore him out.” Gyomei added. “Otherwise Godzilla would’ve had no problem with MechaGodzilla.”
“What
“Godzilla gets saved a lot, doesn’t he?” Muichiro asked. “I mean that soldier saved him in the first one, Mothra in the second, and Kong in the third. Godzilla seems kind if weak.”
Sanemi puffed indignantly. “This whole debate is stupid! It’s a radioactive dinosaur, obviously it would win.”
“Maybe, but King Kong is an ape; he’s intelligent, and has thumbs.” Kocho gestured with her thumbs.
“So Does Godzilla!!” Tengen shouted. This was a devastating shock. On the side of reason stood Obanai, Sanemi, Gyomei, and himself. But somehow, Kyojuro, Mitsuri, Kocho, and Muichiro believed Kong could win! They needed a tie breaker, one who was being silent, and stood a bit further away from the loud group…
“TOMIOKA!!” Kyojuro hurried to the Water Pillar, throwing an arm around him.
“What do you want, Rengoku?...”
“I was wondering, who would win in a fight? Godzilla, or--”
“I GOT IT!!” Tengen hastily dialed a number on his phone. “Hey sweetie, I have a question.”
It was the perfect plan! Even if Tomioka voted Kong, Hinatsuru, Makio, and Suma would back Godzilla without a doubt!...At least, that’s what Tengen thought.
“What are they saying?” Obanai whispered.
“Well, Godzilla’s tough and all, but I think King Kong would in.”
“Wh…what do you mean?!”
“King Kong is awesome! Plus, did you see the Baby Kong?! He’s so cute!” Hinatsuru spoke
“Ugh, yes I saw the baby Kong, but--”
“Is that Tengen?” Suma squeaked, before taking the phone. “Hey baby! How are you?”
“Oh, hey baby. Who would win, Godzilla, or--”
“Godzilla, easily!”
“Right? Thank you! Can you put Makio on?”
“So quick? We’ve missed you Lord Tengen! I missed you! Don’t you miss us??”
“What, of course I miss you! But I’m at the theater, and I need to know--
“I think King Kong would win!” Makio shouted across the room.
“Pookie, he would not. Why is this a debate? Godzilla would win!”
“He’s just a dumb lizard anyways!” Makio shouted.
“Fine, You and Hina can enjoy your stupid Gorilla, Suma and I will be on the side of reason!” Tengen hung up. “Yeah…that didn’t change much.”
“If it’s such a big deal, I think--” Before Giyu could say his mind, he was cut off once again.
“Let me call the Butterfly Mansion!” Shinobu dialed up her many helpers. They were smart, like her! Of course they would vote Kong. “Hi Kanao! I have a question, who would win? Godzilla or Kong?”
“Hm…Mothra.” Kanao answered.
“Wha…that’s not a choice.” Shinobu puffed. “Between those two, who would win?”
“King Kong. He won in 62, and almost again in 2021.”
“Right? Thank you! Wait…how do you know that?”
“Here’s Aoi!” Kanao spoke, hastily handing off the phone.
“Hi Shinobu. How are things? How is Tengen.”
“Good! He’s been respectful. Who would win, Godzilla or Kong?”
“Godzilla.”
“No he wouldn’t! Kong has superior intellect.”
“But Godzilla is radioactive, that trumps everything!”
“Are the girls with you? Put me on speaker?”
“Hi Miss Kocho!” Kiyo greeted.
“We miss you!” Sumi chimed.
“How is everything?” Naho asked.
“Good, good. Who would win? Godzilla or Kong??”
“Neither! They’re best friends now!!” The girls chimed.
“Since when did you three know so much about monster films?...” Shinobu sighed. “But if they were to fight, who would win?”
“King Kong!”
“King Kong!”
“King Kong!”
“There we go.” Shinobu smiled. Then, she heard the doorbell ring through the phone.
“Gotta go, bye!” Kanao stammered, quickly hanging up.
“...Weird. Who else…”
“I’ve Got it!!” Kyojuro chimed.
In the rush of calling people, Kyojuro hurriedly dialed yet another number.
“Hello?”
“Hello Young Kamado!”
“Mister Rengoku! Hi!!” Tanjiro greeted.
“Quick question! Who would win? Godzilla, or King Kong?”
“Well, Godzilla has Atomic Breath, but King Kong has his axe…I think I’m gonna say Godzilla though.”
“Oh…”
“Sorry…”
“Is that bug eyes?”
“Yes! Hello Inosuke!”
“BIG BRO!”
“BROTHER!!” Zenitsu chimed.
“Hello boys! Who would win? Godzilla, or King Kong?”
“Godzilla!!” Inosuke cheered.
“King Kong!” Zenitsu declared.
What followed was the sounds of both slayers fighting. Tanjiro stammered,“Sorry, gotta go!!”
He hung up, sighing in relief and falling back on the couch.
“They called you too?” Kanao asked, cuddling up with Tanjiro.
“Yeah, guess they’re having a big debate.” Tanjiro chuckled. The Kamaboko Squad were having their own watch party of Godzilla films! And before long, Genya would be called next.
“Genya? Who would win? Godzilla or King Kong?” Sanemi asked.
“Godzilla, are you joking?”
“Sweet. Thanks.” Sanemi promptly hung up.
“Wh…rude.”
“Nezuko, sweetie, I have a question.” Mitsuri called.
“Question!” Nezuko parroted.
“Yes! Who would win? Godzilla, or King Kong?”
“Gamera!!”
“Huh? Who even is that?!”
“Gameraaaa!” Nezuko began to sing the titanic turtle’s theme song.
“Um…”
“Senjuro, who would win between Godzilla or King Kong??” Kyojuro called his own little brother last. He too had been invited to their little party!
“Godzilla!”
“No!..okay. Thanks little bro, I miss you.” Kyojuro sighed and hung up, shortly ordering snacks.
“Aww, he misses me…” Senjuro sighed.
“Must be nice…” Genya grumbled.
The Hashira took their seats in the theater: It was a perfect split!
On Team Godzilla were Tengen, Obanai, Sanemi, Gyomei, Genya, Senjuro, Aoi, Tanjiro and Inosuke.
On Team Kong were Kyojuro, Shinobu, Mitsuri, Muichiro, Zenitsu, Kanao, Kiyo, Sumi, and Naho.
And…Nezuko, on team Gamera. One thing was certain; Giyu would be the tie breaker! But before they could ask him, the Water Pillar noticed something strange. As they walked into the theater, he could’ve sworn he saw a familiar face…a white haired boy, with red markings, and strange eyes.
“Tomioka!!” Shinobu poked Giyu, breaking his focus.
“What??” Giyu groaned in annoyance.
“Who would win, Godzilla, or--”
“I don’t care.” Giyu sighed, entering the theater and sitting with the hashira. He swore he just saw one of the Kizuki…regardless, he sat back as the lights dimmed, and the movie began.
To Be Continued...