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Kaidan fiddled with the slim box in his hands as he waited for Shepard outside the restaurant they’d agreed to meet at. They didn’t have much time for shore leave before they were due to depart for their next mission, so they both wanted to capitalize on the free time while it lasted.
The whole evening had been planned out down to the minute. Even on their time off, they couldn’t quite buck the military in them: the need to lay out everything, to nail down every detail. It was all about making the most of the little time they had. And he’d followed their plan to the letter.
At least until he had strolled by a local jeweler’s shop on the way to the restaurant. The polished silver and gleaming gold pieces caught his eye, and Kaidan couldn’t help but pause for a moment to look at the window display.
Nothing had jumped out at him immediately; the usual assortment of rings and bracelets didn’t catch his eye. Honestly, he wasn’t even sure why he’d bother to look. He didn’t wear jewelry, and he doubted-
Hold up, he thought as he spotted something.
It’d been tucked away in the corner, almost invisible, blending in amongst the other silver chains. He shuffled over to get a better look at it. It was a small locket, with a pale blue and pink opal set in silver filigree. Nothing flashy, but Kaidan’s attention was fixed on it.
Why it reminded him of Shepard, he couldn’t be sure. It was dainty and small, rather unlike the commander so many knew and respected.
But it wouldn’t be for Commander Shepard, hero of Elysium and savior of the Citadel. It would be for Rowan Shepard, the woman he’d come to know and love. The woman who adored animals and enjoyed (both good and bad) sci-fi flicks, who loved to get swamped in oversized hoodies and snuggled whenever she could, and who loved fiercely and mothered the hell out of her friends.
He closed his eyes, picturing how the necklace would look against her skin, the delicate silver chain set amongst a backdrop of the freckles that dotted her chest. He imagined his hand brushing over it, eliciting a smile and a shiver from her before he leaned down to press his lips to her throat, tasting the metallic tang of the silver against her skin.
No, it might not have matched Commander Shepard, but it seemed perfect for Rowan.
Before his mind could register what his body was doing, he was already walking inside the store. The clerk brightened when she saw him coming in, and greeted him cordially.
“Hey, can I see that little locket in the window there? The one with the opal, I think it is?” he asked.
“Sure!” she chirped before swiftly walking over to the window display.
And when the clerk brought out the locket for him, and when she opened it up for him to see what was inside, he just knew he had to get it. There was no hesitation, no second thoughts, none of his usual reserve or caution. It was just perfect.
But now, standing in front of that restaurant, toying with the box nervously, he began to doubt himself as his earlier burst of confidence faded. He’d never seen Shepard wear jewelry. They’d never even discussed getting gifts for each other. This impulsive moment of his might not be appreciated by her, and he wouldn’t blame her if she didn’t. Soldiers typically avoided wearing jewelry aside from wedding bands; it could easily be damaged in battle. And Shepard was the practical sort. Surely she’d think this was a misguided idea.
Losing his nerve, Kaidan went to shove it into his coat pocket, to hide it away until he could return it in secret.
“Hey.”
He froze at the sound of Shepard’s voice. His spiraling doubtful thoughts had consumed his attention to the point that he hadn’t heard her approach him. Quickly he forced a smile to cover his surprise and shifted his jacket to (hopefully) subtly hide the box.
“Hey,” he said, trying to act casual. His gaze roamed over her, drinking in the sight of her in a slim cream colored dress. It traveled up, over her curves and muscles, over the dips of her shoulders, until it finally rested on her warm brown eyes, shades darker than his.
A smirk pulled at her lips. “Like what you see, Lieutenant?” she teased.
“Very much, ma’am.”
She snorted softly, shaking her head in amusement. She looked down, and her smile left as she asked, “What’s that?”
He followed her stare. Shit! he thought when he realized that the box was oh-so-barely poking out from beneath his coat. His thoughts spun, trying to come up with some kind of excuse. “It’s - ah, it’s nothing important.”
“Kaidan.” Shepard eyed him warily, head tilted to the side. “Lying? Not your strongest suit.”
“I…” He sighed, realizing he had no choice but to come clean. He pulled out the box, carefully holding it in both hands. “I bought this on the way here. On a whim, really. I… thought of you when I saw it. But I shouldn’t have – I mean, it’s probably not… appropriate. It’s not, is it?”
Smooth, Alenko.
“Hmm.” Shepard stepped closer, hands clasped behind her back in a coy pose. “If it’s regs you’re worried about, Kaidan, I think we smashed those the night before we hit Ilos.”
He barely held back a groan. That night often played out in his head whenever she was near him. Now he felt off balance, caught between his embarrassment of being called out on his lie and the mental images her words bombarded him with. And she really wasn’t helping matters with that warm, mysterious look she was giving him.
“Well, I know, but this is…” He motioned to her with the box. “Kind of – well, you know…”
His brain seemed to be refusing to string basic sentences together. It took him a moment to clear his mind and get it back on track, finally managing to spit out, “It’s kind of risky, gifting something like this when you’re trying to keep your relationship low profile.”
Shepard nodded. “True enough.”
Kaidan sighed. “I… I’m sorry, Shepard.” He glanced downwards at the ground, mentally kicking himself for his stupidity. It had been a moment of whimsy and he should have known better than to give into it. You’re more careful than this. Why did you think-
“Can I see it?”
His head jerked up in surprise. “What…”
Shepard held out her hand expectantly.
He hesitated, unsure if this was a good idea or not. They’d been skirting the line with hiding their relationship as it was. This necklace was not going to help matters. But for better or worse, she seemed intent on it, so after a moment of staring each other down, he relented and placed the box in her hand.
She hummed in satisfaction before she popped the box open with a flick of her thumb. Kaidan watched for her reaction, hands clutched tightly together.
Shepard stared at the locket, her expression softening as she gently traced the filigree with her fingertip. “Kaidan, this is…”
“Do you…?”
“It’s beautiful.” Shepard smiled warmly, the freckles on her face crinkling in delight. She picked up the necklace, holding it out between her hands. “How did you know I like opals?”
Relieved that she liked it at least, Kaidan laughed, rubbing the back of his neck. “I didn’t.” When she raised her brow in disbelief, he lifted his hands defensively. “I didn’t, I swear. Like I said, saw it and thought of you. That’s all.”
“Damn good guess then, Lieutenant.” Shepard held the locket up to the light to examine it more closely. “Oh!” she said in surprise. “Is this…?”
“It’s a locket, yeah.”
She fiddled with the clasp until it finally opened. Bringing it closer to her face, Shepard peered at the inside. “’For you, with a heart as big as the galaxy,’” she said, reading the inscription engraved on the left face of the locket.
Kaidan couldn’t help but smile as he explained, “Fits you perfectly. You’ve taken in people that most would overlook and gave them a chance to prove themselves. You’ve always been there for all of us, no matter what. Everyone you’ve come across, you’ve been fair and kind to, and always tried to give others the benefit of the doubt. Even Saren.” He brushed his knuckles over her cheek. “You’re a good person, Shepard. One of the best I know. I guess I just wanted to show that, somehow. So when I saw it, I just… had to get it.”
She softly bit her bottom lip before dipping her head, shyly breaking his gaze. “You really think so?”
“I know so,” he said, leaning forward to place a kiss on her forehead.
“Thank you, Kaidan,” she murmured as she leaned into the kiss. “I really like it.”
As she backed away, she turned so her back was to him. She lifted the necklace over her shoulder, holding it out to him. “Would you put it on for me?”
Kaidan inhaled deeply, torn between fear and elation, simultaneously worried about the consequences this could have and elated that she liked it enough to want to wear it. He hesitantly took it from her, asking, “You sure? This could-”
She huffed out a sigh, looking over her shoulder at him. “Kaidan, just because I can’t go around wearing it out in the open, doesn’t mean I can’t hide it under my BDUs with my tags. I’m sure I’m not the first soldier to do it, nor will I be the last. I’ve…” she trailed off thoughtfully. “I’ve never gotten anything like this before. It’s sweet and I… I promise I’ll be careful.”
He had neither the desire nor the willpower to say no to her. Nodding, he strung the necklace around her neck, letting it rest delicately against her chest. Shepard pulled her hair up, giving him space to fight with the clasp.
“Sorry,” he muttered as his thick fingers struggled with the tiny hook. “It’s pretty small.”
“No rush,” she said. While he did that, Shepard lifted up the locket and peered inside it again. “Hey, is there something on the right side? It looks like a digital photo template.”
He didn’t respond right away. Instead he grunted in frustration, fingers clumsily fumbling with the clasp. After a moment of intense concentration, he finally got it open, grinning in triumph as he hooked the necklace and let it drop.
Realizing Shepard had asked him something, he peered over her shoulder, letting his chin rest there. “Hm?”
“The locket. Opposite side of the inscription.” She held it up to him for inspection.
“Oh, yeah! I almost forgot.” He tapped the locket. “It’s got a space for a pic. You can sync it up with your ‘tool and upload a photo. It’ll automatically resize it to fit the locket. Kinda neat, huh?”
Shepard leaned back against him, and he took the opportunity to wrap his arm around her waist. He could smell the citrus and honey shampoo she’d used, a far cry from the basic Alliance issued shampoo he was used to. Unable to resist, he buried his nose in her hair, inhaling deeply. Despite how much her strands tickled his nose, he felt content, and was almost tempted to skip dinner and continue doing this somewhere in private.
“Hm.” She smiled, her arm resting on his. “There’s one little problem though.”
His brow furrowed in concern. “What’s that?”
“I don’t have a good photo of you to upload.”
It pleased him far, far more than it should have to hear that. To know it was him that she wanted to hold close to her heart, to have a keepsake of for when they were apart. With a tug on her arm, Kaidan brought Shepard around until she was facing him before pulling her into an embrace, tucking his head against the crook of her neck.
“Well,” he said, hoping his words didn’t betray the dizzying swirl of emotions running through him. “I guess we’ll have to fix that, then.”
“Mmhmm.” Her fingers trailed up and down his back, an action that paradoxically soothed him and heightened his nerves at the same time. “Tonight, some time. We’ll have to remember.”
He nodded, saying nothing else, content to let the silence hang for a moment. And it did, with both of them just enjoying the moment in each other’s arms, blissfully unaware of the world around them.
But it had to end, and Shepard broke contact first, stepping back with an apologetic smile. “We have a reservation to keep.”
“Yeah. We should head in.”
Kaidan reached up, shutting the locket gently. He let his hands drop, stepping back as Shepard entwined her fingers in his. He reciprocated the gesture, unable to hide his smile as they headed into the restaurant. In a few days they would have to return to the Normandy and carry on as Lieutenant and Commander. Tonight, they could simply be Kaidan and Shepard.