Chapter Text
The chilly morning air surrounded Rusty as he searched the mist-laden woods for a familiar tortoiseshell pelt. Although the sudden twitches of his tail gave away his impatience he obediently sat perched atop the fence separating him from the life his father lived.
It was his father whom he thought of the most as he took in the smells of the trees. He was a mighty Thunderclan warrior. Powerful and brave enough to scare away any potential intruder.
His father encouraged him to think of his own clanmates in this way. The more unforgiving the better. So long as it kept Rusty out of the woods.
He sat like this for as long as his adventurous spirit let him. However, it wasn't long until its wispy murmurs of encouragement started reaching his ears. At times like these, he wanted nothing more than to jump down and follow the gentle tug of his heart deep into the forest where he knew it truly roared.
Rusty wound himself up like a spring but instead of bolting to the forest he sharply huffed and started pacing back and forth muttering all the while. "Don't ever leave without me, Rusty. Don't let them see you Rusty. Don't attempt to... to." He distractedly trailed off during his self-imposed lecture when the mist around him abruptly shifted.
In a second the whispers condensed into a single clear voice. "Come kittypet the clans await your arrival.” Those were the words that appealed to Rusty the most. Rusty’s mind liked to persuade him, especially in the mornings. He usually knew better than to entertain these figments of his imagination. Nevertheless, this is an offer he could never pass up on tempting even if he spooked Smudge.
He could barely make out the fuzzy silhouette that called to him. "Hello? Redtail is that you?" He responded in turn suddenly feeling foolish. His mind was playing tricks on him again. He thought as he got lost in the specter's strange silver eyes which the fog just couldn't seem to swallow. He... he had to follow them.
Rusty pushed himself off the edge and dropped down with a heavy thud. A startled yowl answered his fall, Redtail was here after all. “Rusty! Sneaking off again huh?” And he graced Rusty with a particularly stormy expression despite his deceptively jovial tone.
“It’s not what it looks like dad, somebody called for me.” The excuse sounded weak to his own ears but he pushed on. “I thought it might have been you.” Rusty tilted his head in what he hoped was a convincing enough gesture. The amused glint Redtail’s eyes took on told Rusty exactly what he inferred from the story.
A purr escaped Redtail’s chest as he came to Rusty’s side. “Well I didn’t hear anyone but I did see an orange kit bolt into Thunderclan territory.” He said and licked the top of Rusty’s forehead.
“I’m not a kit!” Rusty immediately protested but changed his tune with a single twitch of his whiskers. “You… didn’t hear anything?” Unease flashed through his features.
“So you actually thought someone was speaking to you.” He straightened his back parted his mouth and sniffed. The air was clear apart from the odd smell of twolegplace. He turned back to the only cat whose scent he distinguished. “Rusty, there was no one here.” He spoke quietly.
It was clear that Rusty didn’t catch what he said as he followed the smooth ebb and flow of the heavy fog all around them. Then Rusty abruptly gasped and stumbled to his feet shoving Redtail back as he shouted. “There! Over there!” He pointed at the spot where he’d seen a shape break away from the mass of swirling grey vapour. “A-a cat! Just now, I saw them!” He whipped around to the strangely still figure of Redtail.
Redtail stayed quiet as he considered what to say to his shaking son. He wanted to ask him again, to clarify what he’d seen. Wanted to know where this hidden adversary ran off to. Then, just when he was about to spill all of his thoughts out calm rationale washed over his mind.
He thought back to leaving the camp- nobody followed him here, looked around, checked the smells around him. There’s nothing here not even a measly mouse. Rusty clearly thought there was. His fear was real it permeated the air all around them.
The wild look in his son’s eyes scared him, it wasn’t the first time Rusty tried to convince him of a mirage. It was the first time he reacted to those illusions in this way. It wasn’t unusual for kits to daydream about imaginary friends, especially one as lonely as Rusty must have been.
But this development was troubling. His poor son couldn’t stop trembling while his pupils darted around. Like Goosefeather’s used to. His treacherous mind supplied unhelpfully. He couldn’t avoid the comparison after the cats of Thunderclan made the old fool into a bedtime story.
He gently enveloped his son in an embrace without any more hesitation. There would be time to indulge his own worries. Now he needed to comfort his dear kit. “Shh, it’s okay Rusty, it’s just me.” He continued to soothe Rusty until the last remains of anxiety left him in a final quiet shudder.
He wished he could stay like this forever but time didn’t bend to his whims. He couldn’t have Thunderclan find out about his son. Redtail didn’t pull away from Rusty as he spoke. “I didn’t only come here to scold you about going to the forest.” He said and nudged Rusty’s shoulder.
Rusty’s wide green eyes fixated on his own. Good he needed to listen to this. “Rusty, I’m sorry I haven’t been visiting lately. I’ve been busy since Bluestar named me deputy and-“
Rusty quickly uncurled around him. “You’re a deputy!” The kit grinned and pawed at Redtail’s side. “I knew she would pick you.” He grimaced and pulled his ears back realizing what must have happened. “I’m sorry about Sunstar.” He said bashfully.
“It’s fine Rusty.” Redtail patted him lightly on the head. The edges of his mouth tugged upwards as he watched his son loosen up again. “I’m honoured Bluestar chose me for the position but it’s a lot of work.”
“Of course it is!” Rusty said and started nodding. “Not as much as the leader though! You will have to hunt twice as much when you’re Redstar.” Seeing Rusty’s excited expression discouraged Redtail. How was he supposed to ruin this?
“My clanmates expect me to be a respectable warrior.” Redtail dejectedly lowered his head. “Well, you’re the most respectable warrior I know. You’re the deputy for Starclan’s sake!”By then Redtail wasn’t even processing what Rusty said.
He obviously didn’t understand what Redtail was trying to tell him.
And as the tension inside of him mounted- “Rusty I might not be able to visit you anymore.” The words fell out of Redtail’s mouth in a rush. He looked just as shocked as Rusty. It didn’t take Rusty long to surge forward in fury.
“But you promised you would visit forever!” Rusty cried out and shook his head in disbelief.
“Rusty it’s for your own good. It would be dangerous for both of us.” Redtail tried to press his nose to his son’s forehead but he flinched away.
“I still need you.” He sniffed. His entire body wilted. Redtail wanted to tell Rusty how much he needed him too. How alone he felt in a clan teeming with life. How he had to let go anyway because Redtail needed to fulfil his role as a deputy and Rusty needed to be a proper housecat.
Redtail couldn’t say any of it because it would make leaving harder. “I know Rusty, I know.” He hummed while he brushed against Rusty’s fur. His son couldn’t even look him in the eye.
“I’ll come by sometime.” He said and finally went back to Thunderclan leaving Rusty to sit amid the heavy fog alone.