Chapter Text
Discord blinked. Still nothing but blankness surrounding him. This void wasn't much fun. There were no beings to terrorise here. The only thing in here was him, waiting patiently for someone to decide to allow Chaos to return. Of course, what Chaos was was unknown to any being; since he was sealed away long ago. It was the only time that the demons and goddesses had ever worked together successfully and the story had been lost to all. Except him, trapped in this void.
“Look, I know that powerful kid witch is trying to break me out of here but can't she do it faster? It's so boring, talking to no one but myself all day. Though... I do make a great conversation partner.” Discord spoke at normal volume. Not even an echo answered him; the void he was trapped in not behaving like normal space.
“I mean... sure, that Arthur kid is going to make one hell of a vessel for me... but... can he not awaken his magic and become my vessel right now?” He grumbled, folding his arms and pouting around his oversized tooth. Discord floated around the void for a bit before coiling himself up and deciding to nap. Again. He hoped that perhaps something might have happened when he woke up next. Discord was just starting to doze when he saw a white crack appear in the void. A pair of sunglasses materialised to cover his eyes; because that light after well over 3000 years of pure blackness was blinding, even if it was just a small crack.
“Ooh... I wonder what caused that? It can't be that kid awakening, can it?” He pondered for a moment.
“No... no-no-no, it's even better! That's that seal those goddesses made breaking! Which means...” Discord smirked an evil smirk. Demons were so much fun to torment. Particularly powerful ones. The Demon King hadn't appreciated being made to behave like the ram Discord thought he looked like, nor had he appreciated every bolt of magic he fired turning into chocolate milk. And he could sense powerful demons being released on the other side of that crack. With a snap of his fingers, he jumped through the crack.
@%~
Discord popped into existence right beside the ten powerful presences he'd sensed. All of them gave him a look.
“What the hell are you supposed to be?” Discord's magic informed him this demon was Galand of Truth. Discord also knew exactly how his curse worked, and giving Galand's personality a 180 flip would be a very easy way to beat him with that curse.
“Well, hello to you too.” Discord answered, folding his arms.
“Answer Galand's question. Who are you?” This one was their leader; of that Discord was sure. Zeldris was also... far too serious for Discord's liking.
“Me? I'm your worst nightmare.” He answered.
“To children perhaps. A chimera is hardly a nightmare to an adult.” Another far too serious and repressed demon answered. Though... getting this one to sing love songs for the woman beside him would be hilarious. Or perhaps it would better to tickle him; it might shock Monspeet's companions if he started laughing.
“You ain't answered the question either.” The woman beside Monspeet answered. The sinfully gorgeous woman who strutted about naked save that darkness... Discord gave a knowing glare skyward; that wasn't his opinion and the author should keep her opinions to herself. Derieri wasn't his type anyway.
“I gave you an answer. It's not my fault you don't like the answer.” He informed them, rolling his eyes. One of them rolled too far and almost slipped out. He smirked when the girl...boy... creature wrapped in tentacles looked a little queasy at what just happened.
“I'm pretty sure it's not an ally though. It's magic is off the charts... it has no physical strength at all and has amazingly high spirit as well.” Discord was not impressed by that giant; he knew that one had to be a giant, referring to him as an 'it'. Then again... it wasn't as though a giant with a cloth over his head could see he was male.
“That makes no sense. Even a child has a physical strength of at least one.” Discord liked this one. Though... he wanted her in her true form; that snake was beautiful. Melascula was more his type.
“If it's not an ally... that makes it an enemy.” Discord could sense the demon within this human's skin. The human he couldn't care less about; the demon was called Fraudrin and was the only one who wasn't cursed. Discord watched them start to draw their weapons and sighed.
“Oh, a few little toys. How boorish.” He yawned. He felt a tap... no punch, on his right side followed by another stronger one immediately after. He let the punches keep coming, slowly morphing his body into paste. Only once he was a lump of multi-coloured paste did the punches stop.
“There. Problem solved.” Discord let smugness radiate through him. If that brat thinks I'm so easy to beat... she's got another thing coming. He let the paste morph itself back into his normal shape.
“What the hell?!” That was the silver haired demon... ooh no... that one was a goddess; Discord could tell. He also knew fine well the goddess himself didn't know this. Estarossa was a lie. His real identity was... Discord's train of thought was interrupted by a lance... whatever Galand had in his hand, skewering straight through him. He chose to flop around like a fish, before playing dead.
“Got you that time.” Discord snapped his head up to the smug sounding red demon.
“Made you look.” He extracted the halberd from himself and made the hole disappear. He delighted in squawk of surprise it got from the red demon. He then saw a large fireball floating over Monspeet. He knew what that was for; so manifested a stick with a marshmallow on it. The fireball went flying, incinerating him and the marshmallow on the stick. With a snap of his fingers, he rematerialised, now holding a stick with a toasted marshmallow on it. The wide eyes of the Commandments made him feel rather smug; Monspeet's most of all. Discord was just about to eat the marshmallow when a wave of something atomised him.
“Let's see you come back from that one.” That was Estarossa-the-lie. Discord couldn't quite work out his real identity at the moment.
“Alright.” Discord said, delighting in half of them jumping in what had to be fright. He reappeared, intact and unharmed, toasted marshmallow still sitting on that stick. He saw Zeldris' arm twitch, then felt his body get chopped up into ribbons. Damn. They really don't want me to eat that marshmallow, do they? He thought, ribbons rejoining together. He quickly munched the marshmallow before anything else could happen.
“Are all of you quite finished?” He asked them.
“How in the hell are you not dead?” Fraudrin asked him.
“Oh, were those your best shots?” He asked, sounding rather smug.
“It... it makes no sense! You got pounded into paste by Derieri, skewered through the heart by Galand, roasted to ashes by Monspeet, atomised by Estarossa and chopped to ribbons by Zeldris... there no way you should still be alive!” Melascula commented, sounding completely stupefied.
“Oh my dear, what fun is there in making sense?” Discord told her with a smirk.
“His magic is... utter chaos.” Drole muttered, realisation starting to dawn on the other Commandment's faces.
“Correct.” Discord could also see something on the faces of those ten monsters that most would only dream of. Terror.
“Ah, I see you all finally realised how outclassed you are! Well... shame for you that I make the rules.”
“Scatter!” Zeldris shouted and all of them took off in different directions. Discord snapped his fingers, returning all ten of them back to where they were standing.
“I don't think so. I'm not finished playing with you yet. And I'm sure I'd like to find out what demon hearts taste like... by pulling out and eating each and every one of yours. If you'd like that... go ahead and run off again. I dare you.” Discord gave each of them a wicked look. All of them stayed still.
“Good, you're learning. Now to deal with...” He snapped his fingers, each commandment orb appearing to be added to a juggle.
“These... how's this for a trick?” Juggling nine orbs at once was hard; but Discord managed it. A portal opened on his right side, each orb falling through it until they were all gone.
“And now those little curses are out of the way... What to do to each of you? Oh... I can't think while you have that skin on, come here.” His lion's paw stretched over and grabbed Fraudrin like it was made out of rubber. Fraudrin didn't dare move; for fear that he would be stretched next. Discord peeled off the human covering like it was a banana peel, grabbed the top of Fraudrin's head and pulled him out of the peel.
“There, much better.” Fraudrin quickly found himself flung over at the others. He grumbled when none of them moved to catch him and he landed face first in the dirt. Discord then looked at the human covering in his hand, magically sewn back together.
“Ick. I don't need this.” He drew a portal with his finger and threw the body through it (The portal led to Hendrickson's quarters in Liones and Dreyfus landed right on top of Hendrickson).
“Now then... what shall I do to you lot? Make them all naked... really author, is that the best you can come up with?” Discord grumbled, before thinking a little harder.
“Ah! I remembered who Estarossa was!” Discord remarked, making the silver haired demon appear in front of him. Said silver haired demon looked petrified.
“You're the dog!” And with a snap of his fingers, Estarossa dropped on to all fours and began yapping like a dog, tongue hanging out. Discord was half tempted to kick him back to the others... but he wasn't quite villainous enough to kick a puppy. He materialised a toy in his hand and threw it. Estarossa bounded after it, contently chewing on the toy once he'd caught it.
“Yes I hear you author; you want me to do Monspeet and Derieri next.” Discord commented, leaving all of them rather confused. Monspeet and Derieri were rather nervous when they appeared before Discord next. What manner of madness were they about to be subjected to?
“Alright, fine... you're not the only one who thinks she's hot... I'll give you that one.” Derieri's darkness fizzled out, proving that was indeed all she was wearing. And making the tiniest spurt of blood slide down from Monspeet's nose. So small that most wouldn't have noticed. Discord wasn't most though. He was Discord.
“Oh ho! He fancies you!” Discord's comment got a slight blush on Monspeet's cheeks. Though, it didn't escape the draconequus' notice that the demon didn't deny it.
“And while I'm sure the author would like you two both naked and for you to make passionate love to each other... this fic is rated T! You've wrote them doing that before anyway; multiple times!” That got both demons' cheeks to turn scarlet.
“Though... I could make them do that I guess... It's not like two characters haven't been in that position in this series anyway.” Discord snapped his fingers and Monspeet disappeared. Derieri glared at him.
“What did you do to him?”
“Gosh, cover yourself. Not everyone wants to see your boobs, you know.” Discord didn't answer her question. He grinned, spotting a tuft of brown hair between her breasts. Just like he'd intended.
“Answer my question!” She growled. Discord heard a soft squeak and grinned.
“He's not far. Though... I'm sure he's trying to work out if he's in heaven or hell right now!” Discord snorted, knowing for a fact this would be tormenting the demon. Derieri spun around to the others.
“If... if what that thing said is true... I'd say heaven!” The creature in the tentacle-vines told her, before giggling.
“W-what?”
“It made him tiny and...” Galand pointed, before averting his eyes. Derieri realised what he was meaning and her cheeks went red. Her hand reached down and grabbed Monspeet from where Discord had magicked him to. His cheeks were crimson and blood streaked down from his nose. He also had his hands down to cover himself; being tiny meant no clothes.
“Aw, cute. He does have emotions! Did you like being nestled in her boobs?” Discord asked, rather smug. Monspeet didn't answer him; much as the draconequus expected.
“Back you go!” With a snap of Discord's fingers he'd been returned to his previous spot. Derieri's hands immediately moved to retrieve him again.
“No you don't!” Snap! Derieri's hands were now bound behind her back, locks of hair sliding over her shoulders to cover her chest. The ground had become rather soft around her feet too; solidifying whenever she tried to take a step. It occasionally slid up her legs, only as high as her knee; but her trembling from what it was doing told the others it couldn't feel very nice.
“Now to her other favourite...”
“What the hell are you blathering on about?” Galand asked when he was plonked in front of Discord. The draconequus smirked.
“The author likes you too. But, gosh do you have a mouth on you! Should... oh, but I can!” A bar of soap materialised and floated towards Galand.
“Not sure what you think you're...” The soap took the opening and went in his mouth, scrubbing it as though to try and get a stubborn stain out. It was too fidgety for Galand's attempts to retrieve it or spit it out as well. It disappeared once it was finished; leaving the red demon gagging and spitting out soap foam.
“One more swear word out of you and I'll do it again.”
“That stuff is fu...”
“One. More. Swear. I'm serious young man.” Galand wisely shut up.
“Young man? Seriously?” Melascula started laughing at that.
“Of course. I've been around considerably longer than even your holy war. I'm old enough to be the Demon King's father.” Discord smirked, knowing that as Chaos; he most certainly was the Demon King's father.
“And I know quite a few tricks.” Melascula morphed straight into the snake that was her true form; the tiny little one.
“Much better; I can't concentrate when you're all...” Estarossa had made his way over and placed the toy at Discord's feet. He was yapping; trying to get Discord to throw the toy for him to chase. Discord had a much nastier idea in mind.
“Do you know what else dogs do, boy?” Estarossa gave a confused sounding yip.
“They pee up fire hydrants. Big tall red things that are made of metal.” Realisation seemed to dawn on the grey haired demon's face. His right arm lifted and he pointed a couple of times.
“I'm not a... whatever that thing is!” Galand refuted the point; however Discord only affirmed it.
“Exactly like that one, boy. See how high you can shoot!” Discord smirked wickedly, magically removing Estarossa's clothes too; dogs had no need for them. Galand tried to move and the ground went liquid. He sunk into it up to his ankles; before it solidified again.
“Oh for god sake! No!” Estarossa ignored Galand's protests; making his way over to do exactly what dogs do up fire hydrants (or lamp posts or any other particularly tall surface). Gloxinia started literally rolling around the sky laughing at the wails this got from the older demon.
“Oh, that's what you are, you're a fairy! And I know what we do with fairies!” Another finger snap had Gloxinia's costume morph into a little green dress that appeared to be made out of leaves (and only just covered his butt). Little green slippers completed the look. The laughter morphed into the tinkling of bells and he quickly became worried by this turn of events. The bells sounded more and more distressed the more he made sound.
“What's that? Sorry, can't understand you.” Discord taunted. Gloxinia glared at him, saying something which got morphed into bell chimes as well. It also got a block of soap swishing around his mouth; so it was rude.
“Now on to the giant boy... Do I hog tie you like the Lilliputians did Gulliver? Or... ooh! You like to dance, don't you? They have a thing called Drole's dance in the giant clan.” Discord reached over and grabbed the bolt of cloth covering the giant's head. It quickly turned into a snowball that got launched at Galand. It got the red demon another mouth washing.
“Now... why would a handsome boy like you cover your face up I wonder? To stop the ladies jumping you, perhaps?” Drole appeared rather flustered; so Discord kept up his taunts. An idea came into his head and he gave another glare skyward.
“No author; he's not pole dancing! You already had some of this lot do that too! I prefer...” Drole's costume morphed into a pale pink leotard with a matching tutu. He appeared slightly disturbed by this; it turning more to horror when his limbs started moving on their own. Discord left him to it; no more interested in the little snake he'd played with earlier.
“Hello my dear. You're a pretty specimen.” He scooped up Melascula; who looked rather frightened.
“Don't be scared my dear; I'm not going to hurt you. Humiliate you, most certainly; but not hurt. What to do with a sweet little snake like you?” A pot popped into existence and Melascula was put in it. A piccolo appeared above the pot and started playing a tune. Melascula found her body was moving on its own too; coming out and dancing to the tune of the piccolo.
“Good god how many of these guys do I have to humiliate? The creator wondered what he was thinking creating them; and I'm wondering the same!” Another finger snap and Grayroad appeared before Discord.
“You're the however many in one... The one that can make other species into her babies... The one who would be so much fun to pull apart!” Discord gripped two of Grayroad's faces and yanked. Both demons let themselves become detached, before ending up plonked inside what appeared to be bubbles. The bubbles floated into a perfect cube, both demons inside them pounding to try and pop their cage. Discord started grabbing more faces; doing the same with them. Until all of them were caught, trapped inside bubbles inside a perfect cube.
“Time for a little storm of chaos...” A mini tornado appeared inside the perfect cube; making all of the bubbles start bouncing around off the sides of the cube and each other. Each of the mini demons that made up Grayroad made noises of distress; not liking the bouncing around.
“And then there were two. The phoney and the little boy who just can't wait to be king so he can marry his vampire girlfriend.” Fraudrin and Zeldris shared a worried look; knowing that thing was after them now.
“Time for a musical number, I think. Let's see what kind of voices you lot have!” Discord started tapping his foot in a tune.
“Gonna be a mighty king, so enemies beware!” Zeldris sung. He looked horrified at the fact he'd done that.
“Well I've never seen a king of demons with quite so little hair!” Fraudrin looked just as horrified he'd started singing too. That one needs to work on his singing voice. Discord thought, knowing his own singing voice was better than that!
“Gonna be the main event, like no king was before. I'm brushing up on looking down, and working on my roar!” That one on the other hand... can sing. Should have been a singer boy, missed your calling! Discord thought, bucket of popcorn materialising in his hands.
“Thus far a rather uninspiring thing.” Fraudrin remarked, Zeldris adopting an over the top pose. One which resembled a proud hero.
“Oh I just can't wait to be king!” He proclaimed, the mortified look on his face at complete odds with how pleased the singer sounded. It was perfect.
“You've rather a long way to go young master, if you think...” Fraudrin started telling him, quickly being interrupted. Discord munched his popcorn; clearly enjoying how mortified the two of them looked. He wasn't finished yet, though.
“No one saying do this.”
“Now when I said that I...” Fraudrin started trying to backtrack, looking rather sheepish. And rather humiliated. Discord wasn't finished.
“No one saying be there.”
“What I meant was...” Again, a rather sheepish sounding voice interrupted.
“No one saying STOP THAT!”
“Look, what you don't realise...”
“No one saying see here!”
“NOW SEE HERE!” Discord smirked; knowing that even if he couldn't see it, the purple demon was most assuredly blushing after shrieking that.
“Free to run around all day!” Though, he could tell the black haired demon was blushing. He could also tell that most of the other demons looked to be torn between being horrified on their companions' behalf and roaring with laughter at their misfortune. It was quite the cocktail.
“Well that's definitely out.”
“Free to do it all my way!”
“I think it's time that you and I arranged a heart to heart.” Fraudrin sounded annoyed. He also looked terrified of retribution; this was his leader. He couldn't address his leader like this.
“Kings don't need advice from purple demons for a start!” Zeldris had turned to face the others, who now looked terrified. What was going to happen to them? Discord smirked evilly.
“If this is where the monarchy is headed, count me out! Out of service, out of Purgatory, I wouldn't hang about! This child is getting wildly out of wing!” Fraudrin grumbled, still looking rather worried. He was in for a reprimanding, possibly a beating; for his tone if nothing else!
“Oh I just can't wait to be king!” A different beat started up and Discord couldn't help grinning at the looks of pure terror on the faces of the other seven making their way over. Shouldn't there be eight? Oh, yeah, right. He's comfortably snuggled in his girl's boobs. He thought with a smirk. No, he wasn't retrieving him from his snuggly prison.
“Everybody look left!” All of the others did, looking rather spooked at their bodies moving on their own.
“Everybody look right!” Again, the other seven did as Zeldris commanded.
“Everywhere you look I'm, standing in the spotlight!”
“NOT YET!” Fraudrin interjected, before the looks of terror on the other seven became looks of mortification; it was their turns to sing.
“Let every creature go for broke and sing!” Discord heard eight voices, one quieter than the others. That meant his magic must have hit Monspeet as well. Good. Might do that boy some good to feel something for a change!
“Let's hear it in the herd and on the wing! It's gonna be King Zeldris' finest fling!” That made Zeldris' cheeks turn the same shade of red as his costume. Mind you, most of them had red cheeks, mortified that they were singing; apparently at the whims of Discord.
“Oh I just can't wait to be king!” All ten of them sang together. That's not a bad harmony, considering the voices of some of them! Discord thought, his popcorn bucket now empty. Oh well, this routine is just about finished anyway. He thought, before realising he'd got all ten of them. He had ten of the most powerful demons at his whim. Eat your heart out Supreme Deity. This is what defeat looks like! And all ten of them did look defeated, he guessed. He wasn't through with them yet though.
“Oh I just can't wait to be king! Oh I just can't wait... to be king!” The song had now ended, all of them standing in dramatic poses, still clad in whatever ridiculous costumes Discord had put them in. He looked at them, considering what to do next.
“What do you want?” Zeldris chose to ask him. That brat's trying to work out how to make it stop. It stops when I'm bored. And I never get bored of humiliating beings who believe themselves to be powerful. Discord thought to himself.
“I wouldn't mind an apology for trying to slice me into ribbons.” Zeldris considered Discord's words, but didn't give the apology.
“I thought not. Then again... can't trust a man who likes the attentions of a blood sucker.” Zeldris was lifted up by his right leg and carried over to Discord.
“Tell me, what should I do to your comrades? What do they hate? What would make them scream or cry like babies?” Zeldris didn't answer.
“Guess I'd better try a few things then... Let's see... chocolate rain?” A pink cloud appeared over the head of each of the Commandments, Zeldris included. The clouds started raining chocolate milk and each of them weren't impressed by the rain. Though, to Discord's annoyance, not one of them tried to drink the rain.
“Should try that, it's delicious.” Discord allowed his tongue to slither out of his mouth, like an incredibly long snake, and give each and every one of them a lick to try the rain. They appeared more disturbed by this than the rain currently drenching them.
“You demons like fire, don't you? Let's turn up the heat!” The ground by each Commandment suddenly caught fire, each one of them being dangled like their leader.
“Ooh, Commandments on sticks! Wonder what they taste like... Like chicken I suppose; everything tastes like chicken.” Discord made salt and pepper shakers appear to season them.
“We're not some snacks for...!” Gloxinia squealed, the flames suddenly jetting up, almost singeing his hair. Grayroad sneezed as the pepper caught her noses.
“You aren't? Oh silly me!” Discord let all of them drop, him feeling a smug satisfaction at all of them hitting the ground face first. Unsurprisingly, it got a curse out of each of them, and a block of soap to wash their mouths out.
“You demons sure have potty mouths on you!” He remarked, collecting the blocks of soap. That he had all of them spluttering and spitting out soap foam was brilliant. Discord made all of them stand up, Melascula morphing back to human form.
“Let's see... what's most likely to get a demon to scream?”
“As if we'd tell you!” Zeldris shouted. A white cloud appeared over each of their heads now, this one sprinkling ice cubes over them. Which did get screams; because that worked on every creature.
“A sound those Archangels would love to hear, I'd wager!” Discord clapped his hands, the ice cubes suddenly melting into water that was just as cold. They're next. I bet she'd love for the snootiest Archangel to scream his head off... Discord thought, before making a musical instrument appear, starting up some upbeat tune. Which all of them started dancing to, unable to control their limbs again.
“Well, I've got other powerful beings to humiliate, so... be seeing you lot again when I tire of them.” Discord warped a portal into existence and went through. All of the enchantments instantly wore off when he'd disappeared, meaning quite a few of them were now completely naked and covering their bits. It also meant Monspeet went back to normal size, Derieri ending up on her back with him on top of her. It was hard to tell which of the two of them screamed louder or which of them had the bigger nosebleed!