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The hotel was dark, and all of the doors in the long hallway were closed. Charlie walked quietly to avoid waking anyone up. But why was she awake, and where was she going? She looked down at herself in her pajamas and slippers. She didn’t remember getting out of bed; she wasn’t sure when she went to sleep, either.
Am I dreaming? Charlie looked down the hallway, but it was too dark to see where it ended. If it ended. She did see a door with a light under it, and before she knew it, she was in front of it, knocking.
No one answered, but the door did give way and creaked open. Charlie peered inside.
“This can’t be right.” Charlie whispered, stepping through the door. The room was faintly lit by a few candles, but she could tell where she was: her parents’ castle. She wandered through the corridor, everything around her so quiet and still, until she heard voices.
“Mom?” She whispered, “Dad?” She couldn’t raise her voice; the darkness in the room loomed thickly around her. She felt it creep at her back. She ran in the direction of the voices and burst through the door.
She found herself in her father’s workshop. Lucifer stared at her from his position by his workbench. His wings and tail were stiff, and he was breathing heavily. “Charlie?” He sounded surprised. The red dimmed from his eyes, and the fire disappeared from between his horns. He lowered his hand, dismissing the flame inside it.
Standing in front of Lucifer, with his back to Charlie, was an angel. Charlie saw six pure white wings, a white robe delicately embroidered with gold and blue stars, and a golden halo encircling a white hat. The angel turned around, his blue eyes widened, and he softly spoke. “Charlie…”
“Dad?” Charlie said, and the angel smiled brightly, showing his smooth teeth. Charlie looked over at her father, still staring at her in shock. “Who is this?”
The angel’s smile fell, his eyes looked slightly pained. Something clicked in Charlie’s mind, and her eyes darted between her father’s and the angel’s faces.
“You don't need to worry about him, Charlie,” Lucifer stepped forward. “How did you get here?”
“I came through the door…” Charlie’s voice trailed off. She was staring at the angel’s face. Why did he look so much like her dad?
The angel took her staring in stride and grinned up at her. “It’s okay, Charlie.” He spoke with her father’s voice. “Why don’t we get you back to bed?”
“Hold on.” Lucifer was suddenly beside her, grabbing her shoulder and glaring at the angel. “I’ll bring her back to bed.”
“I’m not going to bed,” Charlie stood stiffly, glaring first at her father, then the angel, “Until you tell me who he is!”
The angel and Lucifer glanced at each other, then the angel chuckled awkwardly. “You mean you can’t tell?”
“He’s not real, Charlie.” Lucifer looked up at her tiredly, and the angel quickly frowned. “I mean, he’s real as in he’s standing right there, but he’s just a memory. He’s who I used to be.”
Charlie gasped, “He’s you-”
Lucifer looked down. “Not anymore.”
“-From the past?!” Charlie flitted over to the angel and clapped her hands excitedly. “How is this possible? Oh my God, Dad, you look so cute!”
“What?” Both Lucifers said, startled.
“It’s true!” Charlie smiled at the angel, who grinned back nervously. “Oooh,” Charlie gasped, the halo’s reflection sparkling in her eyes. “Your halo is so pretty.”
“Ah!” The younger Lucifer backed away from Charlie in surprise.
“Sorry,” She brought her hand away from where she had touched the halo. “It was shiny.”
Lucifer laughed, his wings and posture finally relaxing, “Sweetie, didn’t you just have a lesson for the sinners about respecting others’ personal space?” He walked to her and elbowed her side with a wide grin. “I bet that Angel Dust would love to be the one to give you a lecture!”
Charlie giggled sheepishly. “Sorry, Dad.” She turned to the angel. “And, sorry… Dad.”
“That’s alright,” the younger Lucifer smiled brightly. “I was just surprised. Go ahead and take a closer look.”
Charlie took up his offer and marveled at the intricate details of the halo, keeping her hands to herself, though. She glanced down at the angel’s happy face, and found herself speaking.
“You look so much younger.”
The angel chuckled, while Lucifer put a hand to his chest. “Charlie, I don’t age! You- you’re not saying that I look old, are you?” He gave her a pleading grin.
“Dad, no,” Charlie said with fake aggravation. “You just look…” She stared at the faces of both men, so similar, yet, “…more sad.”
Lucifer looked away, and the angel sighed, reaching out to put a hand on his counterpart’s shoulder. “I’m sorry.”
Lucifer bristled, the fire returning to his eyes. “You’re sorry?” He laughed bitterly, his smile maniacal and wide. “Well, apologize to her, then.” He grabbed the angel roughly by the shoulders and thrust him in front of a wide-eyed Charlie. “She’s the one who doesn’t deserve to be here! She’s the one who had to live in this pit her whole life because of your mistakes!”
The angel stared up at Charlie, tearfully, his wings drooping to the floor. Charlie couldn’t breathe. “I- Charlie, I-”
“You were selfish,” Lucifer snarled, his claws digging into the angel’s robe. “You were stupid. You didn’t think about what would happen to humanity. You didn’t think about what would happen to Lilith. You-”
“Dad, stop!” Charlie felt her horns grow and her eyes burn with tears as she shook her father's shoulders. “Don’t- don’t talk to yourself this way! You’re only hurting yourself. Please, Dad.”
Lucifer looked up at his daughter’s face, but couldn’t meet her eyes. He let go of his younger self, who stepped back to rub at his shoulders. Lucifer shakily brought a hand up to Charlie’s.
“I shouldn’t have said that in front of you.”
“You shouldn’t have said that at all.” Charlie remembered the scene she walked in on. “Dad, did you conjure a younger version of you just so you could fight with yourself?”
“I was intending to talk to myself,” Lucifer said, narrowing his eyes while rubbing her wrist. “I just got carried away a bit.”
Charlie blinked, curiously. “Do you talk to yourself a lot?”
“What? Ha ha ha, nooo,” Lucifer stepped back and raised his hands up innocently. At the same time, the angel rolled his eyes at the devil and said, “Yes.”
“Well,” Charlie suddenly brightened up. “If you’re going to talk to yourself, you should try saying something nice! Positive self-talk is super important anyway! Maybe you could give it a try, Dad?”
Lucifer winced, “I don’t know, Charlie.”
The younger Lucifer glared at him, “What do you mean, you don’t know? You’re supposed to be supporting your daughter, aren’t you?”
“I am! I’m trying!”
“And how many times have you spoken to her in the last seven years?” The angel laughed, humorlessly. “You’ve failed her so much-”
“Dad.”
They both stopped and looked at her. Charlie wiped her eyes and collected her thoughts before speaking.
“Dad, I want you to say something, anything, nice to each other. No arguing or insults. Something genuine. It’s okay if you don’t want to, but,” she paused and looked at him, “It would mean a lot to me if you’d try.”
Lucifer took a deep breath, and let it out. “Okay, Charlie.” He turned to face himself. The angel was standing still, frowning. “Okay, Me.” Lucifer grinned awkwardly. “You- you… fly really well! Good job sticking it to gravity.” He gave a soft punch to his younger self’s shoulder.
“Uh, thanks.” The younger Lucifer looked to Charlie, who was smiling and nodding. He turned back to himself. “I like the way you’re dressed? The coat is… very spiffy.” He gave himself a thumbs up.
“Yes, great job, Dad!” She clasped her hands together and gave them a big smile. “I know that was hard to do.”
Lucifer chuckled. “We barely did anything, Charlie.”
Charlie shook her head. “Yes you did. It was a great start. You can’t be kind to yourself consistently if you don’t take that first step.” She looked at both of her fathers’ perplexed and crooked grins and gave them her most genuine smile. “I am proud of you, Dad.”
“Um, thanks Char Char,” Lucifer stood back. She was still smiling at him. He sighed, then growled. “Okay, fine, I’ll do this the right way!” His younger self raised an eyebrow at him as Lucifer stood before him.
“You,” Lucifer pointed at the angel’s chest, “did what you thought was right. No matter how it turned out, you did it because you cared.” His voice shook a bit. “You cared about humanity. You loved Lilith.” He lowered his hand to cross his arms. “That counts for something.”
The angel looked up at him softly and smiled. “You are trying your best. You’re getting out of that castle; you’re creating things that matter. And if Charlie believes in you,” he reached out to pat his shoulder, “you must be doing something right.” He grinned. “After all, she’s a very special girl.”
Lucifer immediately beamed. “You’re right! She sure is!” They both turned to Charlie, whose lower lip was wobbling as she tried to hold back her tears. She fell into their arms and enveloped them in a hug.
“I lo-ove y-you, Dad,” she whispered, crying and sniffing.
“I love you, too, kiddo.” Lucifer rubbed her back.
“I’m glad I get to become your father, Charlie,” the younger Lucifer added, giving her a squeeze.
After a moment, Charlie let them go, standing up straight. “Now,” she said, still sniffling a bit. “Did that help you feel any better towards yourself?”
“You know what, Charlie?” Lucifer grinned at her and himself, “I think it did help. Thank you.”
“She’s so smart,” the angel chuckled. “She must have gotten it from Lilith.” Charlie watched the two of them lean on each other, laughing.
“Actually,” she said, rubbing her neck, “you kinda taught me this.” The two Lucifers stared at her, blinking out of sync.
“Remember when I was little, I snuck into Mom’s vanity and put on all of her makeup?”
“Oh how could I forget!” Lucifer said, gesturing with his hands, “We left you alone for two minutes and BOOM,” he held out his hands to let sparkles fly through the air, “my daughter became more of a clown than I am!”
“Right…” Charlie frowned. “Well, it’s a good thing you didn’t call me a clown back then, because I would have been devastated.”
“Oh, I would never have said that to you!” Lucifer held up his hands in horror, “You were crying enough as it was. You called yourself ugly! My baby girl was calling herself ugly!” He sputtered. “It took us ages to calm you down so we could clean you up.”
Charlie nodded. “Do you remember how you calmed me down, Dad?”
The younger Lucifer narrowed his eyes in thought. “He made you look in the mirror, didn’t he?”
Lucifer sucked in a breath through his teeth, his eyes widening, “And then I told you to say…”
“I want you to say one nice thing about yourself, Charlie.” Lucifer held his young daughter by the waist in front of the mirror, setting her little hooves on the flat surface of the vanity.
“No, Daddy!” Charlie struggled in his grasp, tears running the makeup down her face. “I messed up the makeup. I don’t look like Mommy.” Her face scrunched up. “I didn’t do it right!”
“No, baby, you did your very best,” Lucifer said, softly. “And you don’t have to look like Mommy; you’re perfect the way you are!” He grinned and conjured a warm, wet cloth to wipe her face. “But you won’t believe it if I’m the only one who says it. Now, I want you to look in the mirror and say-”
“One nice thing about myself.” Charlie smiled. “That really stuck with me, Dad. Whenever I feel bad about myself, I try to look in the mirror, and do what you taught me.”
“I’m so glad, sweetheart.” Lucifer wiped the tears from his eyes. “I’m so glad.”
Charlie looked at her father contentedly, then gasped as she noticed her surroundings had changed. “What happened to the workshop?” She spun around. Tall, green trees surrounded her, reaching up into a blue sky. She could hear water falling in the distance and bugs buzzing nearby. She bent down to touch cool, green grass. “Where are we?”
“This is Eden,” Lucifer looked around wistfully. “It’s just like I remember it.”
“I thought we should get out of that stuffy room, and show you some place nice,” the younger Lucifer replied, spreading out his arms and wings.
“How?” Charlie exclaimed, “Won’t you get in trouble?”
“This is a dream, Charlie,” the younger Lucifer said, distantly, bringing his limbs back down. “I can’t go back to the real thing, but I can remember it.”
“Sometimes, I try not to.” Lucifer mumbled, holding his arms.
“This was all a dream, then?” Charlie turned to her father, her eyes sad. “You’re not really real?”
Lucifer held a hand to his chest and grinned. “I’m fairly certain I’m real.” He took Charlie’s hand and squeezed it. “And you feel real to me. I think you crossed over into my dream, somehow.” He shrugged. “I probably should have eaten something before bed, can’t really control your magic on an empty stomach, now can you?”
Charlie shook her head. “We’ll have to talk about your eating habits when we’re both awake. For now though,” she looked up and smiled, “let’s explore! I want to know how that flower smells!” Charlie ran off to a rosebush in the distance.
The angel walked up to the devil and stared after their daughter. “So… saying nice things to myself, huh?”
“Yeah,” Lucifer smiled as Charlie sniffed a rose, her smile wide and giddy. “I guess it won’t kill me if I try to be kinder to myself. She’ll be disappointed in me if I don’t.”
“Hmm.”
Charlie shouted that she saw something moving in the distance, before taking off. The two Lucifers walked after her.
“Before Charlie came in,” the younger Lucifer said, his wings twitching, “you were pretty pissed at me.”
“Still am.” Lucifer looked at the scenery around him rather than at himself. “It just feels less raw, right now.”
The younger Lucifer took a shaky breath, “It’s been ten thousand years, and it still feels raw.” He looked at Lucifer with tears in his eyes. He pointed at himself. “I can’t let go of this, can I?”
Lucifer grabbed his younger self, and wrapped him in a hug. The younger Lucifer sobbed on his shoulder, halo intertwining with horns. Lucifer rubbed his back, claws carefully brushing the feathers of his wings.
“You’re a part of my past, and I,” Lucifer took a breath, “have to accept it. I have to.” Tears fell down his face. A soft rain began to fall in Eden, droplets trickling through the canopy and rolling off their hats and wings.
The younger Lucifer left the embrace, after a moment, and wiped his face. “We should probably find Charlie; she’s never been in the rain before.”
“She’s definitely loving it, though,” Lucifer angled his hat brim to shield his face. “It’s kind of hard to have any fun in acid rain.”
They both turned as they suddenly heard something running towards them; Charlie leapt out of the bushes, eyes red, tail slashing the leaves behind her.
“Charlie!” “Are you okay?!”
“What the fuck, Dad!” Charlie pointed behind her, eyes wide in agony, “Why are Mom and Adam both naked?!”
“Oh.” “Shit.”