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It was the eve of Beltane and King Arthur Pendragon, Once and Future King, Son of Uther and Ygraine Pendragon, and the Slayer of the Great Dragon Kilgarrah was definitely NOT pouting as he stared at the courtyard from his bedroom window.
He heaved a sigh as the sounds of merriment floated up the tower. Camelot was hosting a feast with all the nobles of the land.
He heard a round of cheers and presumed Gwaine had probably started another round of dancing on top of tables. Judging by how raucous the noise was getting, he surmised that the rest of his knights had joined along with the long-haired knights.
Bam! The doors of his room slammed open.
Arthur sighed, not looking away from his view of the empty courtyard. There was only one person insolent enough to barge into his room without knocking.
“What are you doing here Merlin,”
“Alright, you prat, what’s wrong?” he asked.
The hair on Arthur’s nape stood up as Merlin, his former manservant, now Court Sorcerer walked towards him.
“Nothing,” Arthur slightly shook his head, “nothing is wrong. What would make you think otherwise?”
“That you left the feast early?”
“I was feeling tired, that’s all.” Arthur lied.
“Arthur, you are a terrible liar,” Merlin said. Even without looking, he can imagine Merlin standing behind him, arms crossed with a strange look on his face that never failed to stir the butterflies in his stomach. He makes a note to get it checked with Gaius.
“I just wasn’t feeling it Merlin, go back to the feast.”
“You’ve been looking forward to this for months! You wouldn’t shut up and even annoyed Morgana with all your questions. You have no idea how hard it was to convince her not to hex you after you asked about the hall designs for the thirteenth time!”
“What can I say? I didn’t like it.”
“You were having fun earlier. Try again.”
“I didn’t like the food?”
“It was herb crusted capon, roast venison, and lobsters from Mercia. You inhaled everything which reminds me I need to tell George to add another notch in your belt tomorrow.”
“I am not fat!”
“Whatever you say sire”
“Merlin?”
“Shut up?”
“Exactly. Now go back to the feast.”
“No,” Merlin said. He crossed the distance until he was directly behind Arthur. The blonde’s heartbeat sped up as Merlin kept coming closer. In a much softer voice, “now tell me what’s wrong.”
“It’s nothing Merlin.” Arthur said, standing up. Intentionally, he turned to the other direction where Merlin was standing, deliberately avoiding looking at him.
“Arthur,” Merlin said. It might be Arthur’s imagination but judging from his shadow, it seemed the raven was about to reach out for him for just a second. It was probably just a play of the light.
“Would you like some company then?” Merlin asked.
“No. Now for the Triple Goddesses’ sake, leave me alone. Your King would like to retire for the night. While your station may have improved now as court Sorcerer, I would like to remind you that there are still certain liberties that you are not privy of.” Arthur snapped, throwing his cloak on the floor and tugging off his boots.
As soon as the words left his mouth, he immediately felt guilty. He can imagine the hurt expression on Merlin’s face. He hadn’t lost his temper like that on Merline in a while. Not ever since he realized that he had feelings for him. Feelings may be an understatement. Not ever since he realized that he was deeply, irrefutably, indubitably in love with Merlin.
“Since when have I listened to you?” Merlin said, tone rising. “Now let me.”
Arthur almost jumped as Merlin turned him around with one arm. When did he get so strong? And kneeled in front of him. Immediately, he felt warm as Merlin slowly untied his boots, then his trousers.
Just like that, they fell into their routine from years ago. Merlin snapped his fingers and Arthur’s nightclothes flew from his wardrobe. They did not speak as Merlin undressed, then dressed him into his sleepwear.
Arthur held his breath as Merlin smoothed his shoulders, feeling a heavy wave of fondness for him.
“There,” Merlin said, a little bit raspy. “Now are you going to tell me what is going on with you?”
“Merlin I-“ Arthur’s breath hitched.
“Because if it was those nobles trying to marry their daughters off, you’d be glad to know that Morgana has issued a royal decree that anyone who speaks of your marriage prospects tonight will get turned into an eel.”
“It’s not that,” Arthur said staring at the empty courtyard again.
Arthur felt strong fingers hold his chin and turn him sideways until he was eye to eye with Merlin. Merlin and his cerulean orbs that Arthur can get lost in forever. Merlin and his sharp cheekbones. Merlin and his bird’s nest of raven locks that he’s let grow. Merlin and his abnormally large but cute ears. And just like that, staring at Merlin, he couldn’t stop himself from saying.
“You danced with everyone.”
Merlin’s eyebrows furrowed. “Yes Arthur, that’s what you do in feasts, you dance.”
“You don’t get it. You danced with everyone.” Arthur said, emphasizing the words, holding onto Merlin’s forearms, drawing him closer.
“Arthur wha-“ then a weird expression overtook Merlin’s face, something like comprehension. Immediately, he withdrew from Arthur.
The tiny sliver of hope in Arthur visibly deflated. This was it. The rejection he’s been so scared of for almost 10 years now.
Merlin held his arms close to his chest, as if hurt. “I-I never took you for a bigot Arthur,”
“Merlin what?”
“I thought you never consider stations. And even so, when you appointed me Court Sorcerer, I thought,” Merlin’s lips trembled, “I thought that meant I would be granted additional liberties that nobles have, but I guess not. My apologies sire,” he spat the words, “If you’ll excuse me, I need to return these robes and will be residing back to the servant’s quarters, unless you have anything else to ask of your servant, sire?”
Arthur looked at Merlin in confusion. It took awhile for him to realise what was happening.
“Merlin wait no,” he shouted as he saw Merlin reach for the doors. He can’t let him leave. He can’t let the night end like this.
“You don’t understand –“
“Oh I totally understand Arthur,” Merlin said glaring, “Only nobles are allowed to enjoy the feast while us lowly servants must be in the ed-“
“You danced with everyone”
“Yes, as you keep pointing out, and I apologise my Lord, I stepped outside my station, I-“
“MERLIN!” Arthur shouted in frustration, crossing the distance between them. He grabbed him by the shoulders to stop his ramblings.
“Unhand me you prat! You clotpole!” Merlin batted his hands away.
“You danced with everyone.”
“I-“
“So why not me?” Arthur whispered, keeping his eyes downcast.
“Arthur what?” Merlin asked, deflating in Arthur’s hold.
Arthur summoned all the courage in his body. “Why not me?” He repeated. “You danced with Gwaine, then Elyan, then Gwaine and Percival, then Lancelot, then Gwen, then Morgana, then Leon. Why not me?”
“I didn’t know you wanted to dance. You told Lady Beatrice no.”
“I didn’t want to dance with her.” Arthur said, trying to pour meaning on his words, his gaze meeting Merlin’s trying to convey what he was saying.
“You wanted to dance with me?” Merlin asked slowly. His gaze fell downwards, a blush spreading across his cheeks and neck. “That’s why you were upset?”
“You seemed to have fun with everyone.” Arthur pouted.
“Were you…jealous?”
Arthur looked up sharply. “NO I definitely am NOT-“ he started, defensively then seeing the hopeful look at Merlin’s face, “Yes, I was. I wanted to dance with you. You’re the only one I want to dance with Merlin.”
Merlin smiled. His eyes glowed gold.
“Merlin what?” Arthur asked as the music from the hall echoed from the halls. He looked around and saw that the candles around the room were lit up.
When he looked back at Merlin, he was looking at him with a hand outstretched. “Will you do me the honor of a dance, my Lord?”
“I-“ Arthur couldn’t help the smile on his face, “Yes you may”
And with that, Merlin scooped him up in his arms and they danced. Throughout his life, Arthur only knew how to lead a dance, but he soon realized it didn’t matter when it was Merlin’s chest his head was on, or Merlin’s arms on his waist.
As the music ended, his heart soared as Merlin’s grip on his waist tightened.
“I love you,” Arthur couldn’t help but whisper.
“I love you too, you clotpole.”
Merlin finally closed the gap between them and Arthur felt nothing but bliss. Around him, he felt Merlin’s magic flare up. As the need for air arose, they broke apart with a whine.
“Merlin…why is the room on fire?
“Oh shit!”