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1 Husk
Another overlord meeting gone to shit. The Vee's always had made a mess of things, but this time it was starting to annoy him. He couldn't sit back and watch basking it all in, no no this time he had to intervene when Valentino started saying shit to Rosie.
Valentino may have one less arm now but it didn't satisfy Alastor's annoyance. So what's a better way to get rid of the feeling than going out for some whiskey?
That's how he ended up at a bar with Husk. Owning souls comes in handy for a lot of things, but it also comes in handy when you wanna bitch about your colleagues to someone. Husk didn't really have a choice in the matter, when the chain tugs at your throat you gotta go, and Alastor knew that being at a place serving alcohol would make him a bit more willing to come.
He downed another glass of whiskey and faced Husk who was chugging a bottle of 500 BCE wine. "It's honestly so Filthy he thinks of women like that. All he sees them as are objects to serve him. I served myself an arm when he slid up on Rosie."
Husk hummed in agreement. He held up a finger to signal Alastor to wait as he had something to add on. "Yeah, men like him have no respect for women. In my day, men were the ones fighting the war and got all the recognition and respect, but the women nurses? No one even mentioned them. Without them I probably would've died a lot sooner. They kept us alive and well but no one mentions them."
"Exactly what I'm saying Husker! The women do so much work but it's always the men getting the praise. Nobody cares if the mother keeps the house clean all day and the children fed, it's the magnificent husband that works one job who gets all the praise. He's barely around his kids but god forbid you call him anything but a saint!"
Husk nodded, going back to chugging on his wine. Alastor summoned the bartender for another whiskey and continued on his rant.
Alastor's voice lowered and his tone darkened "Even the young girls are expected to partake in those roles. My father made me help out around the house and sew him clothes as soon as I was able to walk around. All he saw in me was a maid."
He stopped. He saw Husk staring at him.
Realizing what he just said, he summoned the chains and used them to pull Husk up to his face. "Don't you Dare tell a Single Soul what you just heard."
Husk hissed and tugged at the chain on his neck. "Enough with the chains. I wouldn't tell anyone even if you didn't own my soul."
Alastor stared into Husk's eyes for another second before dropping him to his seat, the chains going back to being unseeable by the public eye.
"Good to know."
2 Angel Dust
The sex jokes just Won't Stop.
Alastor was quite frankly tired of hearing the sexualized jokes of himself coming out of the spider's mouth so often. "I'd love to see those long legs wrapped around my waist." "Would ya smile around my dick?" "Is that cane a dildo?"
Alastor, Husk, and Angel Dust were all at the bar together. Husk refilled their drinks while Angel went on and on about how hot Alastor was, clearly drunk out of his mind.
He had had just about enough of this. His ears down and eye twitching as the spider continued to ramble on about how fine Alastor looked and how he had a 'gyatt'. What the hell is a 'gyatt'. What does that even mean.
"No, but, like, seriously Smiles you are literally zesty as hell. Like look at ya! Anyone would want a piece'a'ya! Like, I'd suck your dick even if it meant I'd be your next meal~" He flirted and Alastor slammed his drink on the bar counter.
"Angel, I do not have a dick." He said slowly. Radio dials staring at the spider with warning. Husk immediately noped out of there.
"What?"
"I do not have the parts you are looking for, therefore your jokes are rendered meaningless and inaccurate. You should stop with them now if you cherish your life." He threatened.
The spiders eyes were wide before he closed them and shook his head. "Woahwoahwoah! Calm down Smiles! Sheesh, if you didn't like the jokes you coulda said something I woulda stopped."
"Really now?" Alastor questioned. There is no way in hell someone would do that and not expect something in return. This is hell, the land of deals for crying out loud!
"Duh, like I ain't no overlord asshat like you." He pointed at Alastor before taking another sip of his drink. "But I am sorry for making ya feel like you had to come out to me to get me to stop. Didn't know it was makin' ya uncomfortable."
Alastor was shocked into silence. What the Fuck? No wonder Angel became a porn star, no offense but if he's not gonna use this information to blackmail Alastor it's no wonder he's a porn star and not an overlord.
"Don't tell anyone."
"'Course I wouldn't Smiles, that's nobody's business but your own." He gives a grin in return. "Although, Whiskers was here when you said it so.."
"Ah, don't worry. Husker already knows."
"Alright cool, does this mean he can come back so we can get some more drinks? I'm parched."
3 Charlie
The hotel was rebuilt and it looked so much nicer than before. Charlie was excited, more and more people came up to her to ask about redemption and people from cannibal town offered to help run the building. To say she was happy was an understatement, she was ecstatic!
Her father decided to take residence in the hotel and she couldn't even begin to describe how happy that made her. She was so glad to have her father around again. She already had a bunch of father-daughter things in mind that they could do together.
Since the hotel had been rebuilt from scratch, Charlie thought it would be nice to give the residents rooms with their own personal touches, being built just for them. Angel Dust had wanted a built-in stripper pole, Husk had a mini bar, Nifty had a wall filled with pictures of 'bad boys', Lucifer had.... ducks...... everywhere.., and Vaggie and her's room was a lovely mixture of their own aesthetics. The most noticeable things in the room were rainbows and moths.
Last but not least she had to make Alastor's room. That guy was such a mystery, he had a whole fucking Swamp in his old room. She really did not think that was safe for the hotel but only he ever entered the room so it didn't concern her too much. As long as he wasn't drowning people she'd let him keep it.
She had shown him some of the residents' rooms with their permission to give an example of what he could ask for for his room. They were in the bathroom and Charlie was showing the shower head they had custom made. It was a face with a devil horn on one side and an angel wing on the other. So Chaggie core.
"So do you have anything in mind? If it is in my power I'll be more than happy to help you redecorate!" She said, she knew that Alastor could just as easily create his own room with his magic, but this was a bonding opportunity and she'd be damned if she missed it.
"Hmm. Well, I do miss the head of my taxidermy deer on my wall." He sighed.
Charlie instantly wrote that down. "That's great! ..Not for the deer, but good you came up with something! Anything else?"
Alastor poked at a pink dispenser. "And what is this contraption?" He asked
"Oh, that is a pad dispenser. I'm hellborn so I dont get periods, obviously, but Vaggie does and this way we don't have to go to the store as often, 'cause like y'know magic and stuff. It just produces them." She explained, pressing the button and watching the pad fall out. "Tada!"
"I see," he looked it over once more before looking Charlie in the eyes. "Might I get one of those?"
She stared at him blankly before realization set in. "Oh, oh! Of course! Yes, yes you can, yes!" Before she wrote that down Alastor snatched the pen away from her.
"You are not to tell anyone." He said, his voice low and laced with thick radio static.
Charlie gave a smile in return. "Don't worry Al, I won't." She took back her pen and drew a square, already making a mental note of what it meant. "Anything else?"
"I don't suppose a kitchen would be too much work?"
4 Vox
It was movie night at Vox's apartment, he bought a projector just so Alastor would be willing to watch the movie. God the nerve of this guy, how can one be so against technology?
He was in the kitchen preparing the popcorn when he heard a groan. "Al you alright in there?" He asked.
When he didn't get a response he put the popcorn bag in the microwave and headed to the living room. There he saw Alastor curled up in a ball on the couch and his hand held tightly in a fist drawing blood.
"Al what happened?! Are you alright?!" He asked, voice covered in concern. "Shit are you hurt?" He reached out his hands slowly to let Alastor pull away, when he didn't he rubbed the deer's shoulder.
"...Just cramps. Nothing to worry about, my dear." He groaned. "Just some Advillian will suffice, if you don't mind."
Vox nodded and stood up. He grabbed the Advillian from the bathroom and his heat pad from his closet. He went back to Alastor and helped him sit up. He turned on the heating pad and set it on the lower part of his stomach.
"You can adjust the temperature with this," He pointed at the button then opened the Advillian and handed him two. "Usually the highest setting helps me, I think it's like the warmth or the pressure, I dunno, but it makes dealing with the cramps less painful."
"I see. Thank you, Vox." He popped the pills in his mouth and turned the heat pad up to the highest setting. "I'll admit this does feel quite nice."
"Yeah, but you won't get any better if you keep taking just Advillian. You need all the good shit like Ibudemon and Unalieve too. Never thought I'd miss my period from when I was alive but here we are. Shit's ten times worse down here."
Alastor barked out a laugh. "I couldn't agree more."
+1 Lucifer
After noticing that Alastor had not fallen for his bait for fights as often as he used to, Lucifer grew... concerned. He would not call it that but that is what it was. The king had gotten used to their banter and arguing and to have it all stop so suddenly felt weird.
So there he stood at the front of the radio demon's door. It reeked of angelic energy. The smell was so bad he was worried the demon had been laying there dead. He opened a portal and pranced right into the room, staring at the demon who was hunched over with his hands pressed against his chest.
Lucifer gave a low whistle. "Well look at what we have here."
Alastor whipped his head around, radio dialed eyes blown wide. "Get the Hell. Out." His voice was covered in static, almost inaudible.
"Nah, I know you hate to admit it but it looks like you need help." He gestured to the demon's chest that was covered in blood actively leaking. "My help. And fast."
"I would rather die than have you help me." He snarled.
Lucifer hummed. "I would rather you be dead too, but I'm not doing this for you. I'm doing it for Charlie. As much as I hate it she has grown fond of you. For reasons I can't even begin to think of."
Alastors smile widened. "Oh? Finally playing father after 244 years of absence? I'd have to say you're really late for that role, your majesty."
He smirked seeing Lucifer's eye twitch, knowing he got under the demon's skin. Hands yanked his shoulders down to what he could only describe as midget level and he stared into Lucifer's fully red eyes. "Shut the fuck up. You have no idea what you're talking about."
The grip on his shoulders was tightened and Alastor grew in size, looming over the devil and out of his grasp before wincing and collapsing to the ground, shrinking back to normal. Lucifer let out an amused huff.
He scooted away, ears pinned so close to his head it almost blended in with his hair. He had no power here. He was prey.
Lucifer sighed before kneeling before Alastor. "Look. You clearly need my help. We Both don't like the situation we're in, but we can't change that. Stop being a pain in the ass and let me heal you." He reached to unbutton Alastor's shirt but two clawed hands grabbed his wrists, blocking off his chest.
".... Let's make a deal." He said with a tight smile. Of fucking Course Alastor would try anything to remain in control, even in a situation like this.
"What do you want."
Alastor pondered for a moment before speaking ".. You must never speak a Word about anything that happened tonight, and I'll do the same." He let go of Lucifer's wrists and held out a hand.
The devil rolled his eyes, "I was going to do that anyways." He shook Alastor's hand.
Alastor slowly moved his arms away from his chest and Lucifer was quick to unbutton his shirt and remove the bloodied bandages, leaving his chest bare.
"Holy shit.." Alastor's eyes turned into radio dials and stared at the king's face intently. "Your wound is disgusting! I can literally see the bone! How the fuck aren't you dead already?"
Alastor let out a sigh of relief and closed his eyes. If Lucifer wasn't going to make a comment then neither would he. "Not even a holy entity like Adam can take down the radio demon." He responded.
After examining the wound Lucifer brought an arm up to Alastor's mouth. The deer raised a brow. "Removing the angelic energy in you is going to hurt. Like a lot. It's really deep too. So. If you. I figured if you bite down on something you can focus on that instead of the pain." He said, like it was so obvious.
And who was Alastor to deny such a delicacy?
He put his arm in his mouth and wrapped his teeth around it, motioning his hand for Lucifer to start whenever. And the devil wasted no time beginning to pull the energy out of Alastor's chest.
Oh Man did this hurt. Ow, yeeouch, oh boy.
He bit on Lucifer's arm drawing blood. The aroma of his blood was delicious, he licked it up and continued to bite down harder and harder.
Severed flesh.
And swallowed.
Going in for another bite..
The arm was yanked back
"DID YOU JUST FUCKING EAT MY ARM???" Lucifer yelled in shock looking at the chomp in his arm. Alastor rolled his eyes and leaned in for another bite but Lucifer pulled his arm away, the flesh already regenerating. "Nonono, no more biting. I already got the angelic energy out."
Oh.
Alastor stared at his chest, a brand new scar in place of the gorey open wound. "Hm. I suppose this'll do. Good craftsmanship, your majesty."
Lucifer rolled his eyes "Yeah, yeah, yeah. Would it kill you to say thank you?"
"My, I believe it was the holy wound that nearly killed me. Have you already forgotten? How old are you?" he quipped. Lucifer grinned.
Already back to their old banter. Yeah, he was definitely healed.