Work Text:
Maribug <3:
Hi mon amour. I need to tell you something but I think you'll get upset.
Adrien:
Just tell me I promise I won't get upset
Maribug <3:
Your dad just came into the bakery and said I have to break up with you for PR reasons. If I don't he'll take you out of school.
Adrien:
Classic dad but I don't see a problem
Maribug <3:
Are you breaking up with me OVER TEXT?
Adrien:
Yes kind of but actually no
You'll laugh about it tomorow don't worry
"Hello, I'm Nadja Chamack, and welcome to 'face to face' with today's guest Adrien Agreste."
"Hi Nadja"
"Your recent love life has taken some unexpected turns and the public is dying to know what's going on."
"I have no idea why that might be."
"Let me help you out. Two weeks ago you announced on Instagram that you and Marinette broke up."
"An entirely truthful statement."
"Except that since then you have been seen on dates together. Hugging, kissing, holding hands."
"Well since I'm single right now I can go on dates with anyone. Including my ex-girlfriend."
"Don't you think this is disingenuous?"
"Not at all. You see. Someone from our PR firm thinks that I should be single to improve sales. But I thought, if being single is good for the brand surely being active in the dating scene should be even better."
"This is a PR stunt then?"
"I guess you could call it that."
"How can you call it 'active in the dating scene' if you only go out with your girlfriend?"
"I do not have a girlfriend and go on dates regularly. I can go out with someone else if I ever want to and so can she. Surely that is enough to qualify."
"Hi father. How did you find my interview?"
"If our sales hadn't tripled I would send you to a Chinese boarding school for this."
Epilogue:
AdrienAgresteOfficial:
I'm happy to announce my engagement to my ex-girlfriend of 10 years Marinette Dupain-Cheng. Who I'm surprised has not found a better man since our separation. She will now finally be stuck with me. ^･ω･^