Chapter Text
“I don’t know where everything went wrong. One moment, I’m riding high. I moved here to Denver, after college and started my dream job as a pastry chef at this nice quaint restaurant. My girlfriend and I managed to move into a condo ten minutes away, and I had just saved enough money to purchase an engagement ring!” I said lying on the velvet futon of the office of my therapist office.
If I'm being honest I don’t even like my therapist. Millie recommended I go. To help work through my anxiety, and all it’s done is make me more anxious. I really started because it made Mills happy.
“And then she broke up with you??” said Dr. Carmichael, as she feverishly clicked her pen.
When she opened her mouth, you could see the ever present lipstick stain on her teeth. Her mousy brown hair, shoved up into a bun that might’ve been neat at one point, but now it was sticking out all over the place. Similar to my own hair. Millie always asked why I “didn’t take more care of it” she just never understood. No matter what I did, my hair just never did what I wanted it to do, so I just sort of gave up. Regardless at work, I have to wear a hairnet and a chef’s hat, so most people don’t see my hair anyways.
“Yeah, through a vague letter. She might as well have fucking ghosted me. 2 years! We were together for 2 whole years, and all she said was “Dear Tweek, I hope you figure out what you really want.” like what does that mean???’’ I whined.
Dr. Carmichael stared at me in confusion, and then she scribbled something down on her notepad. I rolled my eyes, and knew that whatever she was about to say next wasn’t going to be whatever she scribbled down.
“What were the events leading up to this break up?” she asked.
I scoffed, and said
“Nothing out of the ordinary. It literally came out of nowhere! The events of that day consisted of me waking up with her still there, and us going through our morning routines, and then leaving for work. When I had gotten home, I noticed some of her stuff was gone, and then found the letter stuck to the fridge with the sea turtle magnet I bought when we had gone to the Denver Aquarium." I said, sighing.
“Well Tweek, break ups, especially ones that were after long term relationships, usually don’t “come out of nowhere” clearly it wasn’t something that had happened on that particular day. Can you look back and think of times she might’ve been unhappy in the relationship?? You said she wrote she hopes you figure out “what you really want”. Did you happen to express a need that she couldn’t fulfill? For example, differences in sex drives is what causes a lot of long term couples to end things. It’s also what causes a lot of infidelity.” said Dr. Carmichael.
She then adjusted the way she was sitting, the rip in her pantyhose, going slightly more up her leg, making my stomach turn. Or perhaps it was the fact she just asked about my sex life that made my stomach turn.
“I wasn’t cheating on her!! In fact I actually didn’t even initiate sex most of the time, it was her. So I assume she was talking about other “needs” or something. I certainly wasn’t some crazy horndog if that's what you are implying.” I said.
“Right,” said Dr. Carmichael as she kept writing things down. I really wish I could read it.
“I swear, I know men have the reputation for wanting sex all the time but I’ve just never been that way! I never understood what was so great about sex anyways, like sure I guess it feels good, but it isn’t mind blowing like some people say it is.” I confessed.
Which is totally true, sex with Millie was just okay, she was really pretty of course, gorgeous even! I’m just not a touchy feely person. If she wanted to have sex though, I wouldn’t say no, that was fine. I could get through the awkward 20 minutes.
“I didn’t say you were always wanting sex. Regardless of gender, you can have different levels of libido. Maybe Millie wanted you to initiate more, and just didn’t know how to explain it." said Dr. Carmichael
“If our sex life was that much of an issue for her to break up with me, I wish she would’ve just told me that.” I said to Dr. Carmichael, before she could open her mouth again.
“Okay, if you don’t think that was the reason, what about the general “spark” or the romantic connection? Did it stay or did she ever seem distant to you? Did you ever feel distant from her?” she asked.
I do appreciate Dr. Carmichael trying to figure out why Millie ended things. Sucks for her that I’ve already concluded it’s because she’s a heartless selfish bitch. If either of us was unfaithful it was probably her. Cheating on me and broke up with me to be with her dark haired brown eyed motorcycle riding side piece.
“Respectfully, Dr. Carmichael, I was about to propose. I think it was safe to say if our “spark” was gone, I didn’t feel that. I mean, I loved her and I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her, she was my best friend, and I’m upset but the one person I want to talk to has me blocked on everything.” I said, and my heart sunk.
I do really miss Millie.
“Okay then Tweek. I’d love to unpack this further, but unfortunately that's our time. See you again next week?’ she said.
“Yeah, I’ll make an appointment with Nancy on my way out.” I lied.
“Great. I’m glad you are trying to work through this Tweek. Seriously.” she said, as she got up to fix herself a glass of water.
I mumbled a thanks, and walked out the door.
Now that I’m not with Millie anymore, I will be promptly leaving without making a follow up with Nancy. No need to ever see that witch in a pencil skirt again. In fact I only went to her today because I needed to vent about Mills, and didn’t think work was an acceptable place to do so. I wasn’t expecting her to kinda be a good therapist for once and actually work through why Millie ended things with me.
She brought up things I didn’t even consider, like was she unhappy with our sex life?? Did she really not feel a spark?? I mean sure we were way past the honeymoon stage, and had fallen into a bit of a routine, but isn’t that what all couples do after they’ve been together for a while?? I shook my head and got into my car. I needed to get to work, plus baking has always soothed my brain. There is really no point in dwelling on the Millie situation now. What's done is done.
“I- You! You can’t be serious??” I screamed to the district supervisor. I had gotten to work and clocked in and already started prepping tonight's desserts, when the district supervisor had walked into the kitchen, and called the whole staff to an emergency meeting.
“I’m afraid I am. Chef Louie has passed away. I know you all know he was struggling with his health, but sadly he didn’t make it. Without him, the ownership of the establishment would go to the next of kin, which I’m also sad to say he had none of.” said the district supervisor.
“So what does this mean?? Do we have to close down??” said someone towards the front of the kitchen.
“Unless someone here can afford to buy the space, and continue to pay rent to the city, I’m afraid so. Chef Louie didn’t have any fail safes in plan, and was actually in extreme debt. He had too many people on his payroll, and had to resort to some shady business practices to keep everyone employed. He had a big heart, but it came with a cost. You will all finish out the month, but after that Chef Louie’s is coming to a close.”
“So what you are saying is Louie fucked us over!” yelled another person. Then the whole staff erupted in a bunch of complaints and screaming at the manager to “do something” about this, and I just sighed, and went to finish preparing my pastries.
After a hard shift with pissed off co-workers, I came home to my empty apartment. Some more of Millie’s stuff was gone. She had taken the airfryer. Good riddance, that thing strips foods of their flavors anyways, and now that she’s gone I don’t have to put up with her “cooking” anymore. No more hot pockets, and Tyson chicken nuggets. This might be because I’m a chef, but you would think even a 26 year old woman would know how to make basic meals, and not still eat like a college kid. Boiling pasta is not that hard.
I let out a long sigh, and flop onto the couch. I throw my shoes off and throw my chef’s hat down in frustration. I can’t believe I lost my girlfriend, and my job in the span of two weeks. What am I supposed to do?? I can’t afford to live here anymore. Millie paid rent too, and between her salary and mine we still could barely afford it. I don’t even have time to really secure another job, since it’s already April 17th and the DM said we only have a job until the end of the month. It will be really difficult to get hired in two weeks. I walk around my apartment, and grab my laptop to look for jobs anyways, but when I open it, I see engagement rings.
Since that was the last time I was using my laptop.
Frankly within the time frame of Millie dumping me and now, I hadn’t actually cried about it. The main emotion I've been feeling is anger, but now as I see all of these diamonds, I can’t help but feel sad. I was doing everything right! I had the job, and I had the girl, and I was about to have the ring. Then it would’ve been kids, and family vacations, and Christmas mornings, and graduations, and grandchildren, and then sitting out on the porch as elders, and just the perfect life.
The life I never had growing up. The life I’ve always dreamt about.
I lie down on my side, and start to soft cry to myself, as I think about how I’ll never live a life I don’t hate.
THREE AND HALF WEEKS LATER
At first, I didn’t ever want to move away from Denver, but it eventually started to hold too many painful memories for me. I spent most of my relationship with Millie in that city, and we had managed to do every single date option available within the city limits.
I also was just in general afraid to see her again, since she’s a nurse at the Denver Public Hospital. I doubt she moved away, so I guess that part of the break up was also up to me.
It wasn't as hard as I thought it would be to find a new job. I had some failed interviews, but eventually landed the head pastry chef position at a new restaurant in a town called South Park.
It’s certainly not the paycheck I was used to at Chef Louie’s, but it would be enough since South Park is far less expensive than Denver. I’m also really looking forward to being a head chef. I can try out my recipes on paying customers instead of just making Millie eat them.
My parents had even helped me move into my new house. Yes, I have an actual house! I’m still renting because I can’t afford a mortgage, and that's way too much of a commitment anyways. I might not even like South Park. I’ve only been here for two days, and I’m so far not that much of a fan.
I don’t start work until Monday, and it’s Saturday morning. I have no plans today, since my parents left last night. I probably could go out into the town, maybe do some shopping, since the walls are pretty bare because Millie took all of the actual decor. She left me with the boring things like paperweights, and tablecloths. Nothing is on the walls, but going out to buy decorations seems daunting to me.
I groan, as I get out of the bed, and shuffle over to my bathroom.
I turned the sink on but no water came out. Weird. That didn’t happen yesterday. I tried the other handle, and then both at the same time, and nothing happened. I throw my head back.
Great! Exactly what I need. I tested out the shower, and that is working, so it’s just my sink. I just jump into the shower, and wash my face and brush my teeth while I’m in there. It wasn’t ideal, but it worked I guess.
When I’m out of the shower, I throw on some pajama pants, and an old ratty t-shirt and I call my landlord.
He’s actually really nice, it’s this guy named Ike Broflovski, and he’s a bit younger than I am but according to the newspapers and awards in his main office he was some sort of child prodigy and graduated high school super early or something.
I don’t know why he decided to become a landlord, if he is that brillant. Maybe, he was just burned out of all the expectations and wanted something that wouldn’t stress him out. That reason makes the most sense to me at least.
“This is Ike! What can I do for you, buddy?” he asked when he picked up the phone.
“Hi Ike, it’s Tweek. I’m at 220 Parkville Avenue?”
“Ah, yes! The one bedroom with red brick on the exterior, eh?” asked Ike
“Yup. That’s the one. My uh sink in my master bath isn’t working. I’d try to fix it myself, but frankly I’d think I would make things worse.” I said
“Eh, no problem, guy! I’ll send over a plumber to look at it! Does today around 1 o’clock work for you buddy?” asked Ike. Despite him telling me he grew up here, he sounds like he came straight from Canada.
“Yeah, that’s great.” I said
“Great, buddy!” said Ike, as he hung up the phone.
I’m kinda annoyed since I’ll have to be the one paying the plumber's fees, and I don’t even get to choose what plumber he sends over.
Hopefully it’s a good one that can just fix it while they are here, and not someone who is just gonna look at my sink and tell me it's broken, then come back three weeks later to actually fix it.
I sigh, and start to make myself some brunch. Since it’s almost noon anyways, a bit too late for breakfast, but too early for lunch.
I was plating my eggs benedict when the doorbell went off. I jump because I’m certainly not used to having a doorbell, and totally forget the plumber was even coming.
When I’m in the kitchen, time seems to stop. It’s just me and the food. I think it’s beautiful but everyone else thinks it’s weird.
I look down and notice I don’t exactly look super presentable. I’m messy cook, so I’m covered with a bunch of food stains, but these aren’t nice clothes I care about anyway.
I just shurg it off and don’t bother washing up because the plumber is probably just some middle aged man with a beer gut, who smells like Drain-o & dirty toilets.
It’s very unlikely it will be someone I wanna look nice for, so I just go and open the door.
I then immediately regretted my decision.
Stood in my new doorway was a tall, broad shouldered, dark haired man, with tan olive toned skin that had no imperfections. Complete with a chiseled jawline.
He wasn’t much older than I was. We are probably around the same age, however if we are, he’s wearing 25 way better than I am.
Thank goodness he was wearing a plumbers uniform because if he wasn’t I’d just assume the lead in the latest CW teen drama got lost and ended up at my house of all places. Or that he was a stripper, because that jumpsuit fits him very nicely.
Huh, he could still be a stripper I guess, but they usually work at night and don’t carry a box of real tools around with them.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone more um, attractive I guess for lack of a better term.
Certainly not a man. Certainly not a goddamn plumber.
It really caught me off guard, and I wanted to slam the door to go change. Maybe I should start hitting the gym or something, if this is what the people of South Park look like.
“Uh hey, are you uh Tweek Tweak?” said the Plumber. His name on his jumpsuit, read out Craig. Hm. He doesn’t look like a Craig to me personally, but what I do know.
“ARGH! Uh Yes! That’s me.” I said, as I gestured for him to come inside. He nodded, and came in. I looked down at his shoes and he noticed.
“Do you want me to take them off? It’s not a problem, I get it. My abuela is the same way.” said Craig as he starts to take off his work boots.
“Oh uh I- you didn’t” I can’t manage to get any cohesive thoughts out for some reason. It feels like I’m talking to a celebrity, but it’s just this small town plumber. He is staring around my house, and that solves the inner debate I had about if I should go decoration shopping.
“It smells really good in here. Are you cooking something?” he asked.
“GAH! Yes, my eggs benedict!” I said, as I head over towards the kitchen to turn the stove off before I burn the leftover hollandaise sauce.
“You made eggs benedict?” asked Craig, with one eyebrow raised.
“Yes! I’m um a uh chef. I specialize in pastries though.” I said, the first coherent sentence I’ve said since he’s been here. Well for the most part. I don’t know why my anxiety is so bad all of the sudden.
“Very cool. Did you get hired at the new bistro? Ugh, I forgot the name.” he said. His voice is relatively nasally and a bit monotone. It doesn’t really match his appearance, but again what do I know.
“The Jade Bite? Yeah!” I said, a bit too eagerly.
“Yes. I’ve been meaning to check that out.” he said, and then he kinda just stared at me, like he was waiting for me to say something.
I didn’t know what to say, so I just stared back. He must’ve been on his first call of the day, because he does not look like he’s been underneath people's dirty sinks all day. Wait, my sink!
“Right, um so the issue is my bedroom sink isn’t working.” I said, as I walked towards my bedroom, and he followed behind me.
“How long has it been like this?” he asked, after fiddling with the knobs for a bit.
“It was working fine yesterday, but this morning it just stopped. Is it going to be something expensive?” I asked, you could probably hear the panic in my voice.
“Nah, I think it should be a simple fix. I’ll be done in like 20 minutes.” he said, as he bent down and opened up the cabinets.
“Great.” I said, and then I just stood there. Watching him, like he’s some sort of mythical creature.
“You can go eat your eggs. You wouldn’t want them getting cold.” he said after he noticed I hadn’t moved.
Then as if I had no free will of my own, I nodded and sheepishly smiled and went back to the kitchen to eat my eggs.
He did indeed finish up in around 20 minutes, and showed me that my sink was working now, and I walked him to the door. As we walked over there he asked me how my lunch was.
“Oh it was good. It’s hard to mess up, I’ve made it tons of times.” I said
“I’m sure, I would mess it up if I tried it.” he said, as we approached the door.
“I could totally show you how one day. It’s on my bucket list to teach a cooking class anyways.” I said, and something about this little conversation had my anxiety at an all time high. I don’t know why this plumber is making me so anxious.
“That would be cool. If you do, I’ll be there.” he said, with a slight smile, and I swear my heart beat increased.
“Well, I guess I’ll have to hop on that then.” I said, as I opened the door, and he walked out,
“Tweek right?” he said again.
“Yes, and um Craig?” I said.
“Yes. Well, I’ll send the bill to your landlord, but don’t worry it’s nothing crazy expensive. It was uh, really nice meeting you.” he said, as he started to walk off.
I started to frantically wave back.
“It was really nice to meet you too.” Then I closed the door, and slumped against it, and smiled.
I think I'm going to like it here.