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“Fuck!” Adam threw the NES controller at the floor, throwing himself backwards dramatically, one arm slung over his face. Scott was already laughing, that wild hyena-like laugh he did when he was winning. They’d been playing mortal kombat for well over an hour and Adam hadn’t managed to beat him once. He’d come close a couple times, but Scott had a bad habit of leaning too close, blaming the short cords on the NES, leaning in to taunt him. The heat of his breath would catch Adams neck and suddenly his character’s being kicked off screen. Fucking asshole.
“Read it and weep Ace!” Reaching out, he shoved Adam lightly, who rolled down onto the floor on his front, fully facing away from Scott and the screen displaying his loss.
“No fair, you get to practise, I can only play when I come over.”
Huffing, he fiddled with the edge of Scotts rug. He’d clearly swept around the thing, the piles of dust clinging to its fringes proving it hadn’t been moved for god knows how long. Scott was twisting a little, clapping his hand against Adam’s back just a little too hard. Lying down next to Adam, it briefly slid across to rest on his waist before being removed completely. The skin under Adam’s shirt suddenly felt prickly, warm, and he shifted slightly before turning to meet Scott's eyes. He was closer than Adam had expected, the elbows propping up their heads bumping a little.
“Maybe you should come round more.” Grinning, Scott nudged him, his smirk increasing tenfold when Adam rolled his eyes. Scott looked like he’d barely bothered to run a hand through his bed hair before Adam came over, scruffy and unshaven, he was nothing short of the most beautiful man Adam had ever seen. The smirk set into his mouth, allowing the pointed edges of his canines to catch the light, Adam had to force himself to look at Scott’s eyes and only his eyes. His gaze hadn’t wavered and the intensity of the hold had Adam scrambling for a next topic.
“I brought the rest of that joint.”
“My man!” Scott was hopping up, rooting through Adam’s bag immediately. Taking his time to sit up Adam allowed himself the moment to admire the other man, bent in half in those jeans. He was sure it would pass, this thing he had for Scott, the same way their phase in highschool where they’d argued everyday had. For now he was content to feel it, or at least content to tell himself he was. Scott turned back to face him, frowning at the end of the joint in between his fingers.
“I swear we didn’t smoke that much?”
Adam was not about to confess to his own private session, not when he’d torn the pillows up off the couch to scrap coins together to afford his half of the bag. Instead he shrugged, letting Scott sit crossed legged opposite him.
“It's pure, it’s not like we need that much anyway.”
Reaching out to light the end, he pretended to focus on the flame and not where Scott’s mouth curled around the filter. His eyes followed the edge of his lips as he leaned back to inhale, dramatic as always. Scott blew smoke up towards the ceiling, taking his second drag before extending the joint to Adam. Right, focus on the task at hand, focus on the inhale, on the second inhale, on the beat of holding it, and then on the exhale. The joint was already practically over, the disappointment on Scott’s face clear.
“We should do that thing where you blow smoke at the other.”
Adam coughed, halfway through his exhale.
“Shotgunning?”
Scott’s expression didn’t change.
“Yeah, so that we can both get a hit at the same time. That’s like double the weed man.”
Adam was almost a hundred percent sure that wasn’t how it worked but he knew better than to argue with Scott. He took the joint from Scott, sitting up on his knees to get a little closer. The weed must be hitting Scott a little harder than it was hitting him if the light dusting of pink across his cheek was anything to go by. Taking a longer drag than normal, Adam focused on his initial inhale. Scott was grinning up at him, his eyes flickering around his face in anticipation causing his head to bob up and down a little. Not wanting to somehow miss Scott’s mouth completely, he reached out to grab his jaw, feeling it jump a little under his fingers.
Scott opened his mouth without having to be signalled to do so, allowing Adam to exhale a slow, steady stream of smoke. For a moment Scott’s eyes flickered shut, he looked almost like he was leaning forward, the weed must have started to affect Adam more than he thought. The other man’s eyes were open again, gazing up softer than Adam had ever seen him. Here in his palm, his best friend, the only person Adam had trusted with his new name, his new life. The beautiful boy who’d followed him to the city, albeit a few years behind when Adam had felt the walls of their hometown closing in. Scott blinked slowly, and the last of the day's soft summer sun hit his eyelashes. Adam pulled away quick, falling onto his butt unceremoniously.
Reaching out with two hands, Scott was taking the joint and pulling on Adam’s arm, pinching slightly. He looked almost pouty as Adam settled back on his knees.
“Come here you did it wrong.” Scott was taking a long drag, competitive as always.
Adam scoffed, he’d done it perfectly fine but of course Scott couldn’t leave it there. Closing his eyes for a moment, Adam was starting to get the familiar heady feeling that came with weed. Scott was gesturing for him to open his mouth and Adam could feel his lips curling up towards his eyes. Leaned close, Scott’s face was a picture of concentration, brow furrowed, focused. A giggle bubbled out of Adams throat and he had to turn away briefly before letting Scott exhale into his mouth. Wobbling a little on his knees, Scott reached out to hold him steady, the hand gentle on his arm. Trying to focus on the inhale, trying to focus on not coughing or laughing, Adam’s eyes practically rolled back when he realised Scott was drawing circles against his bicep with his finger. Scott was running out of smoke, leaning closer to make sure all of it entered Adams mouth, his eyes downcast to focus. Another giggle rolled through Adam’s chest as he realised Scott hadn’t been blowing anything out for a while. Scott’s dark eyes dragged up to meet him, then dropped back to his mouth and suddenly they were kissing.
Adam couldn’t be sure who’d closed the gap but after the initial panic he’d pushed too far had died down he was sure it had been Scott. He went to pull back, only to find Scott’s hand in his hair, holding him in place, leaning up into him. Scott was surprisingly soft, Adam could feel himself melting into the embrace as his other hand found Adam’s hips, pulling him forward. The feeling of falling rolled his stomach and he gently broke the kiss, catching the way Scott chased his lips, eyes half closed. Both of Scott’s hands rested on his hips, giving him a gentle squeeze before leading him into his lap. The joint lay, burnt out and finished to the side of them, Adam’s eyes catching it to check it wasn’t starting a fire. Scott’s finger brushed his chin, tipping his face back towards him. Any doubts Adam had about who had moved first disappeared as Scott kissed him again, the finger on his chin sliding up so his hand could cup his face.
Adam had been kissed before sure, but had never held the body under him to such high regard, never reveled in every place their bodies met, the way Scotts hips sat under his legs, his arms under Adam’s hands. No one had ever held Adam like this either, Scott seemed to worship him, his hold on him set and strong. Scott’s tongue teased Adam’s bottom lip, and he found himself opening himself up without thinking. Someone groaned into the kiss, Adam’s brain fizzing and a hundred miles away, it could have been him and he wouldn’t have known. Scott was kissing him, actually kissing him. The grin was suddenly hard to fight, Scott had to pull back a little, unable to kiss through it. They stayed close, his nose brushing Adam’s cheek, breathing each other's air. Then Scott laughed, a proper laugh, setting Adam off. Clutching his neck, Adam fell forward into his shoulder, unable to hold his neck up still grinning, relishing the feeling of Scott’s chest bouncing against his. Pushing a hand up into Scott’s hair to anchor him to something, he tipped his head to the side to let Scott pepper kisses down his neck between bouts of laughter.
Scotts mouth found the base of his neck and they seemed to settle there, intertwined and pressed into each other's skin. They’d been two halves of a whole they’re whole lives, separated in seating plans, perpetually tweedle dee and tweedle dumb, as a child Adam had been asked if he was going to marry Scott more than he’d been asked to be quiet. Adam inhaled gently, Scott smelled just how he always did, like smoke and cheap deodorant and something deeply homely. Hands slipped under Adam’s thighs, lifting him up off the floor with a small wobble. Adam didn’t even lift his head, sunk so deep into Scotts skin he wasn’t sure he’d feel it if they did fall. Scott dropped him into the bed, flopping down just after him, pulling him close again. It occurred to Adam that every other time someone had touched him so desperately, they’d been pulling him towards something. Scott seemed to just want to hold him and be held in return. His face buried in Adam’s hair, he was mumbling something about beating his ass at mortal kombat again knowing full well neither of them were going to move.
-
Scott was shifting away from him, Adam’s eyes opening slowly adjusting to the dark. He couldn’t remember falling asleep, wriggling his arm as Scott moved off. It had gone numb under his weight, Adam watched the fingers flex like they belonged to someone else. Rubbing his eyes with his other hand, he turned his head to look at Scott who seemed to be gathering a blanket and pillow, glancing back startled at the fact Adam was awake.
“Where are you going?” His voice sounded rough, a thousand miles away, he needn't have asked. Scott looked at him for a moment and Adam knew where he was going.
“It's chill man, no worries.” He was talking like Adam had apologised, like he had something to apologise for. Nodding, he closed his mouth, trying to swallow despite how dry his throat suddenly was. He tipped his head back to look at the ceiling, listening to the familiar click of the bedroom door closing. Scott had kissed him, he had. Adam tried to conjure the moment up in his mind, the memory heavy with smoke, maybe he’d kissed Scott. That seemed more likely. He looked back at the dead arm, attempting to wiggle his fingers again. Only a moment before Scott had been here, on this arm, hadn’t he. The pins and needles began to subside and with it all of Adam's surety.