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I remember when I first saw you, how your grin brightened up my small living room, putting the dizzy lightbulbs into shame.
And it was so easy to fall for it, the charming smile, the soft touches and the pretty words that you threw around like I was the only thing that you saw.
You and your horrible habit of not taking care of yourself.
Me and my love for picking up the pieces you left behind.
Hikaru didn’t know what to expect when he opened the door of his studio apartment. The ad that he placed on the web for a roommate earlier that month wasn’t exactly well-received, so when he heard a knock on his door, his first thought was to grab his pan for self-protection.
He opened the door narrowly, poking a section of his face out to see if he was about to be robbed that afternoon. The person who was knocking on the door slightly leaned down to look at his face when the door opened, his hazel eyes staring into his so intimately for a pair of strangers.
“Hello,” the man said with the smallest of accents. Hikaru was still holding onto the door handle, mouth agape at the sight in front of him. The other man chuckled at his silence and pulled something out of his bag, “I came here for the roommate thing?”
He waved a printout of the apartment listing in front of Hikaru’s face, “Do you already have someone?”
“No,” he denied, slightly surprised at how high his voice went. The guy in front of him was pretty handsome, very handsome, in fact. He wondered if this was a scam, why would someone this nice be willing to share a tiny place with him. Hikaru raised his brow at the other man, “Are you serious?”
“Do you not see my luggage?”
Right, he threw the door open wide so that the handsome stranger could come in. Although in hindsight, Hikaru thought that the luggage was about as big enough to fit his body in if the other man wanted to kill him. He looked up at the stranger uneasily, “What’s your name, by the way?”
“Oh, right.” The stranger sheepishly said, hand letting go of his stuff to extend it towards Hikaru, “I’m Magnus.”
He reached for the hand, and blinked up at him cluelessly, “Hikaru.”
“Yeah, I know. I saw it on the post.” The other man scoffed with a grin. He started to look around the small place, then eventually choose to walk to the sleeping area and looked at his bed questioningly. He glanced back at Hikaru, “There’s only one bed?”
“Yes,” he tried to hold the eye-contact because this was where the convincing was supposed to begin. He heaved a heavy breath, “You can have the bed, I can take the sofa. But this would mean that you pay $60 more for rent.”
Magnus wasn’t actually looking at him, he was staring out the window during the entire time that Hikaru gave his little speech. He stared at his back tensely, thinking about how perhaps dropping to only an extra $50 would be fine. He really needed someone to share the rent with, or else he would die of starvation just to have a place to live in. When Magnus turned around, he had a sly smile on his face, “You’re also going there?”
The other man gestured to his shirt, which had an embed of his college name on the front across his chest. Hikaru had to do a double check before confirming, “Right, yes. I’m starting in a week.”
“So do I,” Magnus brightly said, then made his way to the bed, picking up one of the many pillows and sat down on it. He smiled back up at Hikaru again, “Pretty weird to let me sleep here after you’ve clearly thoroughly used it, don’t you think?”
“Wait, no.” If Magnus were to leave now, Hikaru might just consider the worst possible option to earn money, which, according to Kris, should be the last resort. Actually, it shouldn’t be an option at all, but can anyone blame him for trying to make money?
“I will make sure that the sheet is thoroughly cleaned, I promise.” He added, hoping that the promise of cleaning up could sweeten the deal a bit. Magnus didn’t look like the type of guy who liked cleaning up, handsome guys were always the worst at that. He smiled at him, hoping that he was at least slightly into men so that he could grab at something.
Magnus was holding onto his pillow too tightly for someone who was about to leave, and Hikaru prayed, prayed to whatever god was up there that this wasn’t a serial killer. He was suddenly way too aware of the small place, how the bed was facing the kitchen, separated only by the small dinning table which only sat two people.
What little space the living room had was already filled by Magnus’ luggage, and the two boxes that were apparently moved in when he turned his back towards his potential roommate. He grimaced at the situation, “Please?”
“You’re already begging?” At least one of them were having fun, he watched as Magnus’ eyes drifted to the green sofa facing the TV, which was only two steps away from the bed.
“I’m sure you know how poor the average student is, Magnus.”
“I know. Why else would I be looking to rent a place like this?” Rude, Hikaru should have said something then, maybe if he had snapped back then things would have gone differently. They would have gone their separate ways, and he wouldn’t have to experience whatever it was they had. But at that moment of desperation, he shut up and negotiate.
“So deal?” He asked, hopeful that his wallet could finally get some much-needed relief. Magnus made a show of thinking for a while before shaking his head, “I don’t want to pay the extra $60.”
“Well, you have to sleep on the sofa then.” Hikaru sighed, this was supposed to be a relaxing day. The thought of having to help Magnus settle in was already tiring.
“Why can’t both of us sleep on the bed?”
“What?” Hikaru exclaimed, eyes nearly bugging out of his face. Magnus’ grin widened, “Why? Are you scared that you can’t hold yourself back from touching me?”
“No.”
“Good, then we have a deal.”
Magnus slept with no shirt on. He climbed onto the bed at 11 and tried to snuggled close to Hikaru like they were friends. To which he countered by using two of the many pillows to build a barrier between them, hoping that it wouldn’t result in him climbing up the other man’s body in his sleep because the awake version of him was already considering that.
But he woke up to the barrier gone, and the skin of Magnus chest rubbing against his clothed back. The arms around his waist wouldn’t let go, and Hikaru prayed, prayed to whatever was holy that he could have the patience to deal with his for a few years.
Just a few years.
Magnus was a big socialite. By the time their first year ended, he knew almost everyone that had to do with anything. He would often stumble back into their place in the dark, hands reaching out for Hikaru, smelling like booze and bad decision.
But Hikaru would sleep through it anyway because he would always be so sweet afterwards. He would wake up in the morning to be greeted with the taller man’s sheepish grin and rambling apologies. And Hikaru would eat them all up, he would get up and make greasy food for him because they were broke and that was the best option.
Magnus would say ‘thank you’ and do it again the next weekend because there was free food at the parties. And that was the best option for his limited budget.
“Where are the eggs?” Magnus yelled at him from the kitchen, even though the studio apartment was small enough for the two of them to hear each other at speaking volume. The fridge creaked in protest when Magnus slammed it shut, and Hikaru groaned from his desk.
“We’re clearly out if you can’t find it.” Schoolwork was already killing him, did Magnus want to accelerate the process even more. There was a pause in their conversation as the sound of oil hitting the hot pan rang out through the room. Hikaru reached out to push the window open further to let the upcoming smell out.
“You should have told me that we were out, so I could buy it.”
“If I knew that we were out, then I would have bought it before you did.” He replied mindlessly. The smell of onions and garlic filled his nose, and Hikaru leaned back in his chair to take in the view of the man in front of the stove. Magnus had the silly red apron which he insisted on buying on, although they could have used the shared fund for literally anything else, like lightbulbs.
He hunched over the pan, then looked back up to meet Hikaru’s eyes. “Well, I hope you look forward to having an eggless fried rice then.”
Hikaru didn’t mind that. Most of what Magnus cooked was more than good enough for him to eat anyway, he doubted that the lack of eggs was going to make a difference to the amazing smell that was coming out of the dish.
“I thought you said that this was due earlier today?” He asked Magnus as he stared at the mock-up which he had been working on for the last few weeks. For a moment, said man looked at Hikaru cluelessly, as if he couldn’t understand what came out of his mouth. Then he exclaimed, “Oh fuck!”
Hikaru had to eat dinner alone then, because Magnus had to dash out in the middle of the night to beg his teacher for forgiveness. And even though Hikaru thought that the action was severely unethical, he didn’t say anything about it.
He even had the heart to wait up and reheat the rice for Magnus when he came back.
Magnus was handsome. Hikaru would be lying to himself if he said otherwise, but it still pissed him off when someone else noticed it.
“I’m just saying, bro.” Kris talked to him when he came to visit one day, “I’m surprised that you haven’t jumped him yet.”
Which was weird because he knew that Kris was straight. So really, there wasn’t anything to be concerned about there. But also, Hikaru wasn’t into Magnus. He didn’t even know if Magnus was into guys in the first place.
It was odd because he got surprisingly angry at that, mad at the idea that if Kris could admit that he was attractive, then many other people must feel the same way too. And sure, Hikaru was just a roommate, but the thought of Magnus possibly bringing someone in one day from his parties and telling him to leave them alone for a while irked him.
He recalled frowning throughout dinner, and only speaking again when Kris left.
“What’s up with you today?” Magnus asked when he got into bed that night, quietly squirming closer and closer to pull Hikaru’s head so that he was lying on his arm instead. The other one went around his waist, pulling him flushed against the other man’s chest like they weren’t just roommates.
He kissed the top of Hikaru’s head when he didn’t answer and swung one of his legs over his, essentially covering Hikaru's body with his. His fingers drew circles on Hikaru’s clothed stomach, slightly tickling him.
“Please don’t fuck anyone on our bed,” he whispered when it felt safe enough, when he thought that Magnus had already fallen asleep. He was answered with a chuckle and Magnus pulled him in closer, putting his chin on his shoulder.
“Why would I even think of anyone else when I already have you here?”
“But I hate the outside, Magnus.” Hikaru said for the umpteenth time that day as he mulled around the tiny apartment. Magnus had been trying to coax him into going to some museum with him, saying that it was for one of his projects. He was pulled to a stop when hands landed on his shoulders.
“For me?”
Hikaru was turning into such a weak man. It only took one look and skin contact to make him feel like giving Magnus the world. So he agreed, trudging along with the other man as he wandered around the museum like he was trying to find gold.
Hikaru was never a great appreciator of art. So maybe what he saw in those building structures were minimal compared to what Magnus, who was studying architecture, saw. But he was happy to be there anyway. He was happy to listen as Magnus raved about the design and scoffed at other people who were also doing their research there.
Lust or crush or whatever it was, was making him dumb. He latched on to Magnus’ words attentively, staring into his eyes hazily when they got dinner together afterwards because Hikaru was turning into goo every time Magnus so much as breathed.
Perhaps it was telling that it was Hikaru who hung on to every word from the start like Magnus was preaching gospels to him. And perhaps it was even more telling that it was always Magnus who was always ready to go somewhere, luggage always by the door, ready to dash at any moment.
Sometimes, Hikaru thought that he was too horny for his own good. Like that time when Magnus was coming out of the shower one night, hair soaking wet with nothing but a towel on, despite the fact that Hikaru had begged him again and again to please get dressed in the bathroom.
“Don’t glare at me as if you don’t enjoy the view,” Magnus would say, then Hikaru would make a puking face at him, and they would pretend that nothing was wrong. The other man would take his sweet time finding some shorts or pants, then climbed onto the bed with his arms already extended to take him into his hold.
They never talked about it, of course. Hikaru never really asked Magnus about the times when he woke up to the other man intentionally or unintentionally poking him with his morning wood. And Magnus never really asked Hikaru about all the times that his stares lingered a bit too long or if he touched Magnus a tad too much during their movie nights.
What type of roommates snuggled each other to sleep anyway?
But that night, when Magnus came out of the shower, Hikaru wasn’t in bed. He was at the cooking area making coffee, getting ready to not sleep for the rest of the night. So the moment that Magnus came out of the shower, he was right in Hikaru’s personal bubble.
He could smell the other man’s soap, which smelled like his, because they were sharing most of the toiletries by then. “It saves money,” he could recall Magnus telling him as he reached for Hikaru’s stuff out of Hikaru’s side of their make-shift wardrobe.
“What are you thinking about?” Hikaru must have spaced out for a long time, because when he came to again, there were droplets of water on the shirt that he was wearing, presumably from Magnus’ still dripping hair. Which meant that the guy was mere inches from his face, peering down at him with nothing but a towel on.
“About how you still stink after a shower,” he replied. Hikaru couldn’t even walk away from where he stood because somewhere in between him blanking out, he had been backed against their counter, with Magnus’ hands resting on either sides. He sighed, then tried his best to look annoyed instead of excited.
“You’re getting my shirt wet.”
“It’s my shirt, silly.” The accused smugly replied. Right, no wonder it was particularly big on him. How was it even possible that he grabbed Magnus shirt?
It was a long period of staring, of them standing there with Magnus’ lips hovering right above his, smelling like vanilla and mint. It was bad, and it was wrong. Hikaru knew better than to do anything stupid in college. He swore to himself that studying was going to be the focus, and relationships ended in heartbreaks anyway.
But Magnus was so tempting, and Magnus was right in front of him, lips pursing at him, begging to be kissed. All it took was one small movement, one tilt of the chin, and he fell for it. Magnus’ hands came to hold onto to the side of his waist almost immediately, pulling him in closer like he had been waiting for that moment for a long time.
“What a pretty sight,” Magnus praised from on top of him, lazily trailing kisses down his stomach, then pulling what little clothes he had left on his body off.
By the time that the other man opened him up, Hikaru couldn’t even recall what his project was about anymore. The calls from his group mates went unanswered, and the sound of panting and small grunts filled up their tiny place, occasionally accompanied by Magnus’ praises and Hikaru’s pleas.
That night started their new, undefined relationship.
It was better that there was no label, Hikaru had insisted. That way, neither of them would get hurt if something in their relationship went awry. Magnus accepted the offer like he did regarding their rent deal, with a bright smile and an offer for Hikaru to join him in bed.
Hikaru could follow orders so well. He arched his back just right when Magnus asked, and he learnt to give him kisses as ‘thank you’ and ‘goodbye’ because he knew that the other man liked it.
Magnus also really liked to take things from him, his agency, his sorrows, his worries. So, when Hikaru came home after a long day, he knew that everything was going to be fine the moment his eyes found the familiar brown eyes and unruly hair.
It was so easy, falling into a routine of doing things together. From the sweet little activities that roommates usually do, to the disgusting words that Magnus would whisper into his ear as he thrust into him at night. Hikaru got drunk on it, he hung his hopes onto it, even though he was the one who was so resolute that it should be otherwise.
There was water dripping from their ceiling. A wet patched formed at the corner, and a puddle was starting to accumulate in the living room corner where the problem started. Magnus didn’t know how it started. The people above, a couple in their 60s, didn’t have anything that should leak there, so his first thought when to their pipes.
“That’s silly,” Hikaru said, even though he had no clue of what was going on. The other man was already at school, and since Magnus didn’t have class that morning, he had the pleasure of watching their ceiling leaked for the first time.
“I’m serious,” Magnus slightly yelled to the phone. There was a small splashing sound every time the droplets hit the floor, he tried to bring the phone closer to the impact zone so that Hikaru could hear it too.
“You’re just saying that because you don’t want to go to class.”
Magnus sighed to himself. He faked a cold one time, and Hikaru had started to accuse him of lying every time he told him that he was going to miss class. He stared at the forming puddle in silence, the water was opaque, he didn’t want to know what it was. Magnus pushed his empty luggage aside to shield it from the indoor rain.
“You promise that you would buy me that sandwich for lunch when you come to campus.” Hikaru said through the phone. He genuinely thought that Magnus was trying to get out of it, it would seem.
“Do you really want it that bad?” He asked, although he was already grabbing his stuff to get out of the door. Leaking ceiling be damned, it wasn’t like he could do anything about it at that moment anyway.
They would return that night to a semi-flooded room, where Hikaru cried over his books that were practically swimming in the slimy water. In hindsight, Magnus should have stayed back and called someone to fix it.
During most weekends, Hikaru was in charge of breakfast.
He would twist himself out of bed early in the morning, and took his time to drink in the morning coffee and the view out of one of their small windows. He liked to stare out at the bustling street below as he heated up the pan, then occasionally sneaked glances at the man who was still laying in bed.
One morning, though, when he looked up from the pan to the bed, his gaze was greeted with a pair of narrowed eyes instead of the comforting view of a sleeping Magnus.
“Good morning,” he said, because it was a good morning. The sun was out, and they had no plans for the day. Hikaru could just lazily hang around their place until tomorrow morning when the stress came back again. Magnus pushed himself up by the elbows, “Morning.”
“Do you want to go anywhere today?” Hikaru asked, although his plan was to stay in. Magnus rolled off the bed and walked towards him, dragging their blanket with him. He gave Hikaru a peck on the cheek when he got close, then wrap himself around him like a koala hanging onto a tree. The blanket covered both of them, and Magnus laid his head on his shoulder as if he was trying to fall back to sleep.
“I want to stay in you today,” he mumbled against his neck, and Hikaru felt himself blushing, hands coming up to cover Magnus’ ones that were trailing over his waistband. The other man sighed against his skin at that, “You’re no fun.”
He scoffed at the accusation, but kept quiet anyway. Magnus quickly removed himself from his back after that, choosing to help him set up the table instead. When Hikaru turned away from the stove, Magnus had already left for the bathroom, the sound of water splashing filled their little apartment.
“Are you done with your little tantrum now?” His sister asked from over the phone, her tone tense and tight like it was Magnus’ decision to walk out of the house. He scoffed at the memory of his father shouting, his siblings not doing anything, and him having to compose himself before saying ‘fuck it’ and left Norway behind.
Now there they were, asking him to go back like he was that easy.
He rolled his eyes, although his sister couldn’t see it. She continued her guilt-tripping peaching anyway, “Mum is worried.”
“She already knows that I’m doing my bachelors here.” He said, but his heart was already wavering at the thought of it. It has been wavering for a while now, the truth was that Magnus really had nothing to stay in America for. He did come here as part of his tantrum, and expected himself to go back home after he graduated, just so he could rub it in his parents’ faces that he could do it without them.
“You expect her to go to you at her age?”
Magnus turned back to the person sleeping next to him, dead to the world without a care. He threaded his fingers through Hikaru’s hair, marvelling at the soft, dark curls that spread on their bedsheet like paint. Magnus hung up the phone without answering her question, it wasn’t the type of question which needed an answer anyway.
He leaned forward to press a kiss on Hikaru’s lips, caressing the spot with his thumb when he parted. Magnus mumbled to himself, to the empty room filled with unsaid promises, “You’re such a bad influence, Hikaru.”
The other man couldn’t have heard him, but he shifted on the bed anyway, moving closer to him and rubbed his face against his palm like a kitten asking to be petted. He pulled him even closer when he eventually lied down, dragging the smaller man so that half of his body was lying on him.
The night drew on longer than he thought it would.
“Stay still!” Hikaru scolded him as he slapped his hand away. They were standing in their small bathroom, posing in front of the mirror because apparently Magnus could not be trusted with a razor anymore. He grumbled something under his breath, and continued to drag the blade along Magnus’ cheek.
“It’ll be faster if you let me do it.”
“Well, we tried that,” Hikaru slapped his hand away again, and this time he just let it happen. Magnus trailed his hands to the smaller man’s waist instead. Hikaru looked up at him, and continued his preaching, “You got a warning for being a health hazard last week.”
“It’s not that bad,” Magnus softly said. It really wasn’t that bad, that particular professor just had a thing for making his life miserable. How was a beard going to knock down any mock-up, let alone be a health hazard?
“You look like Santa Claus,” Hikaru said from where he stood.
“Do you not like it?” Magnus asked back. Hikaru was so close to him, one hand holding onto this chin, and the other dragging the razor across his face. Magnus could smell their shampoo on his hair, the coffee on his breath, and the softness of his skin under his shirt. He wished that they were doing something else other than something as boring as shaving.
“Shut up, I hate you.”
It’s funny, the ridiculousness of it all. The angry tone that Hikaru took even though he practically begged Magnus to help him shave, how the shorter man glared at him as he worked, although Magnus knew that his heart swell whenever he saw him.
It’s funny because Magnus was starting to act the same way, illogically go about his day because of one silly man and one silly crush.
Hikaru had a funny look on his face when Magnus came back to their place one evening. He was sitting in front of one of his mock-ups like he was about to destroy the entire thing at any moment. The other man had called him before he left class that day, asking him to buy something for both of them because he didn’t want to cook, even though it was his turn to manoeuvre the stove that night.
“What are you doing there?” He carefully asked, brain rewinding anything he could have possibly done to make Hikaru want to destroy his precious project. The shorter man smiled at him sheepishly, then made grabby hands at him when he got closer, non-verbally asking for the food in his hands.
“I’m just admiring the model,” he said when Magnus sat down next to him. It was a mock-up of a small house, nothing too extravagant. Magnus was just thinking about how it was too simple for one of his last few projects in his university journey earlier. But from the way that Hikaru was admiring the structure, people would have thought that this was the most impressive thing that Magnus had built.
It was far from his best work, but he sat back and watched Hikaru point out the little things in his mock-up anyway. The other man even had the time to add theories about the hypothetical family that was living there along the way.
“I think that it’s more cosy to live in a small house like this,” he said, dark eyes peering at Magnus’ face like he was waiting for him to agree. Hikaru should have known, by then, that Magnus would agree with anything he said. He leaned to observe the mock-up with Hikaru, nodding along with him as if he was considering the statement anyway.
“I think so too,” he replied, and Hikaru shifted closer to him. Shoulder touching him as they ate from the small takeaway boxes in the dark because turning on too many lights was too much on their budget. The lights made it difficult for him to sneak little touches anyway, so who was he to mind that?
It was Hikaru who crawled up the bed last that night, draping his body over Magnus like a layer of blanket. His face found the crock of Magnus’ neck and rested there, breathing in his scent until he fell asleep on him, softly snoring through the night.
It’s funny that after over 3 years of being together, Hikaru could still find a way to make trigger the butterflies in his stomach. He would have thought that he would get tired of him by then.
“Oh my god, Magnus. Why am I still finding toothpicks all over the place?” Hikaru yelled from under the sofa. Magnus was thinking about something lewd related to the position that the smaller man was in, but decided to shut up once he heard what Hikaru said.
“They grew legs, babe.” He said sheepishly.
Their finals were over already, but Magnus still hadn’t found the chance to tell Hikaru about his departure yet. He was actually leaving in a week, but he hadn’t even begun to pack yet. His luggage still rested where it was the first day, by the door near the TV, like he was ready to leave at any moment.
It was Hikaru who insisted on a deep cleaning after their exams, saying that they should clear out their place so they can move on from this part of their journey. Magnus didn’t really want to move on from this part of their journey. He wanted to linger a bit longer, stay in a bit more, perhaps wake up the next day and realise that there was still a year left in his university life.
He had been so unhelpful that morning, taking all the time in the world to do the bare minimum when Hikaru worked through the entire apartment like a tornado, sweeping everything that was in his path up. It felt wrong.
It was as if they were erasing all the evidence that they were there all together. The crumbles from some late night dinners long ago, the dark spots on the counter when Hikaru spilled some sauce and left it there for too long, the prints on the fridge when Magnus slammed the door a little too hard.
When they sat down for dinner that night, Magnus opened the can of worms.
“I’m going back soon.” He said, at the exact moment when Hikaru said, “We should think about where we should go from here.”
There was an uncomfortable pause after that, where Hikaru just sat there and gapped at him for a while. His shoulders visibly dropped and Magnus could make out tears brimming in his eyes before he spoke again, “And you’re telling me now?”
Hikaru didn’t speak a word to him after that. He turned away from him when he climbed into bed that night, and Magnus fell asleep to the sound of Hikaru’s sob, which carried on for the rest of the night.
The other man helped him pack for the rest of his remaining days, and in between their work, Hikaru took him around town, telling him that he should at least know what real America was like before he left him.
At every places that they went to, it felt like Hikaru was trying to convince him to stay, like he was showing him all the things that they could have done if he chose to stay. He would lean on Magnus just a bit more when they sat, and he kissed him more, even when Magnus didn’t ask him too.
It was all so cruel that he did all of it so close to his departure. It was all so cruel that every time they lied in bed together, he could hear Hikaru’s soft cries before he fell asleep, how he knew that him being so close to him only hurt him more, and how he could feel the other man flinching away when he tried to calm him down.
Hikaru didn’t cry the night before he left though, he didn’t sleep at all in fact. The shorter man insisted on holding him that night. Hikaru told him that he will hold him to sleep for the first and the last time, that Magnus always had the advantage of holding him to sleep for the last four years.
So he laid on Hikaru’s chest and tried to sleep, tried to ignore his own weeping heart. He tried to ignore the fact that by the morning after tomorrow, he wouldn’t be waking up to their slightly yellow ceiling anymore, that he wouldn’t be hearing the sound of Hikaru stirring his coffee anymore, that back home, there was no way he could reach the living room with just a few steps anymore.
He woke up on the day of his flight to Hikaru’s puffy eyes and light touches. The fingers in his hair and the familiar sound of construction from the floor below because they were both too lazy to complain about the noise problem.
And when he left that morning, he tried not to think about the thud he heard behind the door, about the creak on the stairs that Hikaru always complained about on their way home. He tried not to look up at the window that Hikaru liked to stare out of as he drank of his morning coffee, he tried not to look back at the street when the taxi drive off.
The street where he stood idly for hours before he mustered up the courage to go up to the tiny apartment to look for a place to stay after coming to town for the first time, the street where Hikaru would wait for him to help carry their groceries up, the same street where he stood by to wait for Hikaru to come back when he forgot his keys at home.
In the small apartment where you and I share what I will never share with anyone else.
In our kitchen, where you tried to impress me with your skill, where I jokingly pretended to not be impressed.
On our sofa, where you curled up to me like I was the safest place in the world.
In our dainty bed, where I drank up your words and hold you to sleep.
And to think that I thought that you were just a pretty distraction,
not knowing that you were going to keep a piece of me with you.