Chapter Text
In honor of the one year anniversary of the war ending, Lance's family decided to host a dinner for the team.
And of course, they all said yes because, duh, free food.
Lance was a nervous wreck the whole week leading up to the dinner. He made sure everything was perfect around the house because he didn't want his friends to come into a messy house hold!
He could barely sleep, nervousness or excitement keeping him up he didn't know. And now here he was, the night before the big day, the one year anniversary of the ten-thousand-year war ending all because of Voltron.
Exciting stuff!
Yeah. But it just so happened to be the date of Allura's death. Which just so happened to be Lance's girlfriend…
The girlfriend of his who gave him these Altean marks…
The same marks that are the reason why he hates looking at his own reflection. The reason why he spent nearly an hour standing in front of his mirror, crying as he desperately tried to scrub the blueness off of his face.
The reason why he didn't want his friends to see him…
He let out a muffled groan as he rolled over in bed, shoving his face into his pillow. He had to get over this. His friends knew that he had Altean marks now. They've seen it a handful of times.
But that doesn't mean they don't stare.
Hell, even his own family still stares at him and they've seen him nearly everyday since he got them.
He thought he liked eyes being on him, but now, he wished nobody would look at him ever again.
☙
The morning before the big dinner was so crazy. To start off the day, he struggled to get out of bed, knowing that his marks would haunt him all fucking day.
After he eventually forced himself to get up, he spent a good hour in the shower, moving like a damn zombie. After, he did his skincare, though he didn't do nearly as much as he did before… well, before everything.
Mainly because he didn't care anymore.
Then he stared at his closet, biting his nail as his other hand was holding the corner of the towel up that was currently wrapped around his waist.
After picking out a simple blue button up shirt with some jeans, he rushed out of his room, avoiding the mirror since he already spent twenty minutes glaring at his reflection while he was in the bathroom.
“Good morning, Cariño.” Lance's Mamà said with a smile as he entered the kitchen. His twin sister, Rachel, was sitting at the kitchen island, sipping on some protein shake while his Papà was sitting at the small breakfast nook that was in the corner of the room, reading the newspaper.
“Good morning, Mamà.” Lance said with a slim smile as he sat down besides his twin.
Well, they weren't really twins anymore. Since while he was in space, he only aged one year…she aged three. So, currently, he is nineteen and she is twenty-one.
If he thinks about it too much he gets sick to the stomach so he tries not to.
“You excited for tonight?” Rachel asked as she wiggled her eyebrows, confusing Lance.
“Yes… “ He said hesitantly before continuing, “but why are you wiggling your eyebrows at me?”
“Because all your friends are gonna be there, so, I get to tell them embarrassing stories about you.” Rachel said with a grin before she took another sip of her shake.
Lance could only half-heartedly glare at her before moving his attention away from her. The team; Keith, Hunk, Pidge, Shiro, and Coran, were all supposed to arrive around five-o'clock. Two hours prior to when they were actually going to be eating dinner.
So, yeah, that gives his siblings plenty of time to mingle with his space family, embarrassing the fuck out of him. Granted, Hunk and Pidge already knew half of the crazy stories of his childhood. But Keith, Shiro, and Coran…
He cringed just thinking about it.
Suddenly Lance stood up, eyes slightly wide. “Oh crap. I forgot to feed Kaltnecker. I'll be back in a dobosh.” He said quickly as he grabbed his farming shoes, attempting to put them on without sitting down.
“A dobosh?” Nancy asked, turning around with raised eyebrows to look at her son.
Lance nearly face palmed himself but luckily didn't because that would cause him to lose his balance and fall flat on his ass.
“Shit- I mean shoot. I meant a minute. God, sorry, my brain is not working today.” Lance said quickly, finally getting his shoes on.
“Wow. News to me. I didn't know your brain ever worked.” Rachel joked. Nancy, on the other hand, just nodded wordlessly as she watched him run out of the house.
To be honest, Lance didn't need to rush out of the house so quickly like that. It wasn't like he hadn't fed Kaltnecker in days, she just got fed yesterday. But, he felt like he was a dobosh… a minute away from suffocating.
He soon entered the barn, making a face at the smell immediately. He grew up on a farm, he was in this barn everyday growing up. But apparently space not only changes you but it changes your senses as well. Exhibit A: he was no longer immune to the smell of farm animals. And Exhibit B: He heard everything now.
Quietly humming to himself, Lance fed Kaltnecker along with some of the other farm animals. It was pretty peaceful until he heard footsteps– loud, noisy footsteps.
Without batting an eye, he turned around, immediately grabbing the nearest sharp object (which just so happened to be a hoof pick) and raising it up defensively.
In front of him was his ten-year-old niece Nadia who's eyes were so wide they were nearly bulging out of her eye sockets.
Putting the makeshift weapon down slowly, Lance took a deep breath. “Nadia.” He began, “You know not to sneak up on me like that.”
“I– yeah I know, but I used to do it when I was younger and I guess I haven't… gotten used to not being able to do it.” She mumbled, just barley meeting Lance's eye
Lance kinda wanted to cry because he also missed when he wasn't so jumpy all the time. Before, he slept with his door wide open. But now, it's shut and locked. His curtains and blinds are also closed and he has a small night light that's beside his dresser to give him just enough light to be able to see if he just so happened to need to defend himself in the middle of the night.
So yeah, he gets where she's coming from.
“I miss those days too.” He said with a small sigh as she finally walked closer to him, tugging at his hand.
“Tìo Lance, why are you so jumpy all the time?” She asked, voice small as she tilted her head up to look at him.
“Nadia… I've told you, I was in the middle of an intergalactic space war.” He hoped that would be the end of the conversation but she just continued to stare at him, eyes slightly wide with curiosity.
“I had to be cautious all the time in space. We were never truly safe. There was always something out there to get us.”
“Do you ever wanna go back to space?” She asked, her wide brown eyes blinking up at him.
He felt his heart sink to his stomach and his mouth suddenly felt very dry. That's the question he's been asking himself for a whole damn deca-phoeb— fuck— a whole year.
She was still looking up at him, her small hand in his, when they each heard Lisa, Lance's sister in law and Nadia’s Mom, yell for them to, and I quote, “Get their skinny asses inside.”
As Lance carried Nadia on his back into the house, he could only thank whatever higher being there was for interrupting that conversation because what the actual fuck.
☙
“But Mamà I can help!”
“Nuh uh, Cariño. You go wait in the living room for your friends.” Nancy said, turning around to lightly whack him on the shoulder with a towel.
Lance grumbled something under his breath before moping into the living room where all the men in his family were currently seated.
“Football? Really?” Lance said, unamused as he walked through the doorway. He stood there with a very bored and dull look on his face.
“Oh come on Leonardo, come sit and watch it with us. You love football!” Lance's Papà, Charles, said as he motioned towards the sofa with his hand which held a beer bottle.
Lance just sighed and shook his head. “Papà, do you really have to be drinking right before everyone arrives?” He then looked to the right and groaned. “Luis. You too?”
“Hey I'm a thirty-three year old man. Let me be.” Luis said in a mock defensive tone before he took another brief sip of his beer.
Lance just stared at him before slumping down on the sofa right next to his eleven-year-old nephew, Silvio.
“Tìo Lance?”
“Hm?” Lance said, blinking before looking down at his nephew.
“Are you dating Keith?”
“W-what??”
Just then there was a knock on the door and Lance could only pray to whatever the fuck that whoever was knocking wasn't Keith.
Because… well, what the fuck kind of question is that? How did Silvio even make assumptions like that? Also, holy shit was his face red?
“Leonardo, go answer the door.” Charles said absentmindedly before yelling at the TV, followed by Luis and Marco.
Taking a deep breath, Lance got up to answer the front door, whipping his sweaty palms on his pants before fixing his hair by simply just running his fingers through it once. Then, he opened the door–
“Lance!” Hunk said with a big smile before wrapping his free hand around his best friend.
Lance felt like crying. Thank God it was Hunk who was here first. He just returned the hug, squeezing his eyes shut so no lousy tears would escape. Before he knew it, Hunk was pulling back from the hug, still grinning before he shoved something in Lance's hands.
“What…”
“It's blueberry brownies!” Hunk exclaimed.
“Oh. Oh!” Lance's whole face lit up as he held the tray closer to his face, sniffing. He nearly melted at the delicious smell. “I'll go ahead and give these to my Mamà. Be right back.” Lance informed before making his way into the kitchen.
“Lance. I told you–”
“No Mamà. I just came in to give you these.” He held the tray up. “Hunk made them.”
“Oh!” Nancy said, sounding almost relieved before she swiftly took the tray out of her son's hands. “Now go hang out with Hunk.” She then proceeded to shoo him out of the room.
When Lance walked back into the living room, he was met with a horrifying site. Luis and Marco talking to Hunk.
“–I mean we all miss her greatly, for sure, but I mean Lance definitely—”
“What are we talking about?” Lance asked with forced cheerfulness as he sat down beside Hunk. He knew what they were talking about. It wasn't difficult to put two and two together that they were talking about Allura.
“Oh Lance, buddy, we were just talking abou—”
ding dong ding dong dingdongdingdong
“Alright, Alright! I'm coming. Jeez…” Lance huffed before sitting back up, yet again. “At least we know for sure that isn't Keith or Shiro.”
He heard Hunk snort as he walked away to go open the door. This time, he was less stressed since he knows damn well Keith would never ring the doorbell that much.
And, as always, he was correct.
“Hey Lancey-Lance.” Said the gremlin herself as she stood at the door, one hand on her hip while the other held a box.
“Hello Pidge.” Lance said with a bored tone despite doing his absolute best to hide the smile threatening to bloom on his face.
“Hey.” She responded quickly before shoving the box right in Lance's face.
He stared at the box, “What is this?”
“Oh my god it's for your mother from my mother.” Pidge rolled her eyes before shaking the box. He finally got the hint and took the box out of her hands. She followed him into the house as he closed the door behind them with his foot.
“Okay but that doesn't answer my question. What is it?”
“Probably some cooking thing, dude. I honestly don't even know.” She said with a sigh before immediately grinning when she saw Hunk sitting on the couch.
“Okaaay…” Lance bit the inside of his cheek as he watched Pidge and Hunk immediately flow right into a conversation. Whatever. It's fine. He doesn't live with them anymore so it shouldn't even bother him. He nodded to himself before walking back into the kitchen.
It was a while later before there was another knock at the door. A while meaning fifteen minutes. This time Nadia was the one who opened the door. She insisted, saying she wanted to greet the guests. Lance knows she actually just wants to see Keith since he accidentally found out that she thinks he's cute.
Though, much to Nadia’s dissapoint, it was Coran who was at the door holding a bouquet of flowers. As Nadia led him into the living room, Lance immediately noticed that they weren't just any flowers. They were Allura's favorite.
“Lance! My boy. Hello. How are you doing?” Coran asked him gently, no doubt still having some of his gleeful tone in there.
Lance simply just shrugged, “Doing as best as I can be.” He then eyed Coran. “You?”
Coran sighed, narrowing his eyes to the floor. “I as well.” He then cleared his throat, holding the flowers out for Lance.
“Are these for my mother?” Lance asked as he took the flowers into his own hands, the sweet smell of them instantly filling his senses.
“No. They're for you.” Coran replied, raising an eyebrow as if he was confused as to why Lance would ask such a thing.
“Oh.”
knock knock knock
It was nearly twenty minutes later now. People were now scattered all around the house. Most of the women were still in the kitchen but this time Hunk was with them. Pidge was sitting next to Coran on the couch as she explained what football was. Most of the men were still in the living room yet Lance's Dad and eldest brother were now in the basement.
“I'll get it!” Nadia yelled before nearly full on jumping out of her seat, sprinting into the hallway. Lance ran after her, fucking panicking because oh god what if it's Keith?!
She did beat him to the door, luckily only by a few seconds. By the time he turned the corner, she was pulling the door open.
Shiro was standing there, the polite smile on his face becoming even more polite when he saw that it was in fact a child who answered and not someone he already knew.
“Hi! I'm Nadia.”
“Hello—”
“Shiro!” Lance picked his niece up, ignoring her huff of protest. “Why don't you come in?”
“Thanks, Lance.” Shiro turned around. “Keith! Are you coming?”
Anddddd— now Lance's face was red.
“Yes! Hold on!” After a few more seconds of silence, the passenger side of the car opened then slammed shut. Keith walked around the car, looking way too fucking hot. His black hair was messy but in a hot way, he wore a red button up shirt with the top two buttons undone, and he of course had some black ripped up jeans that were styled with a chain belt and combat boots.
“Ooohh!!” Nadia gawked, saying exactly what Lance was thinking out loud.
Keith looked up, a hint of confusion in his eyes at the sight of some random child in Lance's arms before he seemingly came up with the answer himself since his eyes returned back to normal.
“Hey, Lance. How are you?” Keith asked, now standing beside Shiro.
“Great. I'm… I’m doing great.”
Keith just raised an eyebrow before he followed his older brother inside, closing the door shut behind him since Lance's hands were full.
“Uh— everyone is already here so just make yourself comfortable. Dinner will be done in like… forty-five or so minutes. Uh…” Lance then trailed off.
Luckily the silence was quickly filled. “Keith. How do you feel about playing dress up with me?” Nadia asked with wide eyes, her arms still remaining wrapped around her uncle's shoulders.
“Wh— wait what?” Keith asked, eyebrows furrowed together in confusion.
Shiro only laughed quietly before walking into the living room, leaving Lance, Keith, and Nadia alone.
“Dress up?” Keith asked.
“Oh my god…” Lance could only mumble under his breath before setting her down. He rubbed his temples, wishing to make him or his niece disappear. He honestly didn't know which one was better at this point.
“Yes! Dress up. I have a nice tiara that would look great on you. And I'm sure you could fit in one of my dresses…”
Lance shook his head. “No way. I can't even fit into your dresses. So if I can't, Keith definitely can't. He has muscle.” He then froze, realizing he yet again spoke before thinking.
If Keith was weirded out by his comment, he didn't show it. “Yeah…I have some muscle I guess?” He shrugged, “But don't have so much doubt in yourself. You're fit too. Unless you somehow lost all of that muscle in a year.”
Lance actually chuckled at that, knowing it was actually quite the opposite. He did farm work a lot and thanks to the muscle he gained as a Paladin, doing the heavy duty stuff on the farm his Papà or older brother could no longer do just enhanced that muscle.
“Oh trust me, it isn't gone.” Lance said in that teasing tone that he always got in his voice whenever he was talking to Keith. Fuck, what did this man do to him? He was never like this around anyone else.
Keith smirked. Actually smirked. “Really? Well look at you go, Lance.”
Oh fuck was he hot.
Yeah, Lance was actually fucked.
☙
When Lance thought he was fucked, he didn't think that would mean one second he'd be sitting on the sofa, watching as Nadia and Silvio asked Keith a million questions to then imagine Keith actually fucking him when the taller man licked his lips before smirking.
He nearly scared himself to death. That alone was enough to make him actually start choking on his own spit out loud. Shiro, who was sitting right beside him, gently patted his back, asking if he was okay.
“Yeah–” Lance wheezed out, “Yeah I'm all good. No need to worry Dad.” He said playfully, glancing to the side to see Shiro huff in mock annoyance before nearly breaking character by smiling.
Just then, his annoying ass brother Luis decided to walk back into the living room, the beer in his hand and a certain sway of his legs showing that he was not very sober.
“Ah. Lance, your space fam is here.” He said as a greeting before sitting down in the chair, taking a sip of beer before looking at Keith.
“Hey dude. I saw something online a few months ago… saying that you were gay or something.” Luis asked, unbothered by the whole situation despite everyone else being clearly uncomfortable. “Is that true?”
Keith lightly bit his teeth together nervously, looking between Shiro, Pidge, and then Lance before finally looking at Luis. “Uh, yeah. It's true.”
Lance kinda wanted to strangle his brother for asking such a stupid question. (That was very obvious by the way. Like seriously, who looked at Keith and thought that man was straight? He had fingerless gloves and a mullet, for fucks sake.)
“Ohhh. Okay cool dude. I support you. I thought Lance was gay when he was a teen for the longest time since he cared so much about his skin and got like…manicures and shit. Oh dude, don't even get me started on the makeup phase he went though—”
“Okayy! That's enough.” Lance said, his face a vibrant red that complimented Keith's signature cropped jacket very well. Of course he was embarrassed. For multiple reasons actually. One being that he had been questioning his sexuality at that time was the main one. Like damn, it was that obvious? Obviously, he isn't gay, he's bisexual, but nobody knows that!
“Okay, jeez. I'm just saying. I mean I'm shocked you don't like d—” Luis paused, now noticing that his two children were in the room. “—men. That you don't like men.”
Lance just huffed and grumbled incoherent words under his breath. Something among the lines of how he did in fact like that. Though nobody could understand it.
“Anyways…” Pidge said in a horrible attempt to ease the tension in the room. Luckily, she soon started up a conversation about a terrible party they all attended back when it was the OG Paladins; Shiro, Keith, Lance, Pidge, and Hunk.
“It smelt like feet there.” Keith said with a face.
“I think that was the scent of the aliens…” Shiro said hesitantly.
Pidge nearly laughed. “What?”
“Like–” Shiro's voice raised at least two octaves, “They all had that terrible smell to them.”
“They really did. And none of them took no for an answer! No wonder they were all stinky.” Lance huffed, crossing his arms.
Keith groaned, also now remembering how the aliens treated them. Pidge frowned deeply and nodded.
“Yeah,” She agreed, “They treated us like we were there just for show.”
“Thank God we had our armor on for that one because I think at least six different aliens touched or at least attempted to touch my ass.” Lance said with a slight shutter, remembering the long skinny hands of all the aliens, grabbing at his body like it was a new toy they just got.
Luis was making a strange face the whole conversation, simply just listening as the former Paladins talked, head moving side to side to look at who was talking.
“Glad I don't have to attend one of those ever again.” Pidge said with a relaxed sigh as she leaned back, her hands on the back of her head as she shut her eyes.
“Yeah, me too.” Shiro mumbled, looking tired just from talking about their adventures in space.
The conversation kept flowing normally. Coran had joined Hunk in the kitchen earlier after only a few minutes of sitting in the living room. Nadia and Silvio were soon bored and headed outside to play for a bit before dinner was ready. Charles and Marco also soon joined them, easing into the conversation.
In the blink of an eye, they were all being called to dinner.
Jusssst great. Lance thought his brothers were bad, but no. His sisters were definitely a lot worse.
☙
Once everyone was settled, they all began to dig in. Lance was seated in between Keith and Hunk because of course he was. The world just loved to watch him suffer. Though, despite the world's hatred for him, so far he hasn't had many bad thoughts during the two or so hours his friends have been at his house. So that's good—
“Those flowers are truly beautiful.” Nancy said softly as she looked at them.
Coran nodded, his smile sad. “Yes, they were Allura's favorite.”
Everyone went quiet. Which was very uncommon for the McClain household to do so. Lance knew it was because Allura was mentioned. He also knew everyone was basically tip-toeing around him, scared he would burst into tears at the mention of her name. Him, not Coran, for some odd and unknown reason.
“Allura was Lance's girlfriend right?” Nadia asked.
“No, that's Keith.” Silvio answered his sister before quickly shaking his head. “Wait he's a boy so he would be his boyfr—”
“Where did you get the idea that Lance and Keith were dating?” Pidge asked, eyes wide in shock but she was also smiling very, very widely.
“Wait. They aren't?” Silvio looked at Pidge from across the table, eyes even wider than hers now.
“Well I don't think so. But I can't really speak for them…”
“No.” Keith said quickly before clearing his throat. “No, we aren't dating.”
Ouch. That hurt a bit. Lance glanced over at Keith before looking back down at his dinner. He knew his feelings weren't at all reciprocated. Keith has way better things to do with his life than waste it on liking some farmer boy who's still ‘hung up’ over his ex.
Despite the fact that Lance has been over her for months anyways but whatever, sure, he'll keep up the heartbroken boyfriend act for a few more months. He knows that Allura didn't actually love him. At least now he knows. He definitely didn't a year or so ago. But, by the end, Lotor still won Allura's heart.
Which is fine! He doesn't really care, if he's being honest. Sure, when he first got that realization two months after she died, he felt sorta numb for a few days. But that was because he thought he was unlovable. But he now knows that he was just being dramatic with that one—
“Lance?”
“Huh?” He cocked his head up, nearly cracking his neck in the process.
“Can you pass the mashed potatoes?” Veronica said, her eyebrows raised with a very unamused look written all over her face.
“Oh yeah. Of course.” Lance then picked the bowel up, handing it to his sister who was across the table from him.
“You've been dazing out a lot.” She said as she scooped the mashed potatoes onto her plate before absolutely soaking them in gravy.
“Uh… ADHD?” He said, though his tone sounded more like a question than a statement.
“Right… blame it on your ADHD.” She teased, rolling her eyes.
“Oh please–!”
“Córtenlo ustedes dos.” Cut it out you two. Nancy said using her native tongue, glaring at her two children.
“Mamà, ni siquiera estábamos peleando.” Mamà, we weren't even fighting. Lance said with a slight eye roll that somehow went unnoticed by his mother.
“Comportarse" Behave. Nancy said lowly, a clear signal that the conversation was over.
Clearing his throat, Marco decided to start up a new conversation. This time about football.
“Marco nobody gives a flying fuck about football.” Rachel deadpanned, ignoring her Mama's warning on the cursing.
“It's the best sport ever!” He said defensively, his jaw dropping as if he took great offense to her comment.
“American Football…?” Keith wondered out loud, mumbling.
“No. Soccer but they call it football.” Shiro answered back, his tone also sort of mumbly.
“Oh.”
“White boy just got confused between the two?” Luis teased.
Lance actually laughed at that, a full on belly laugh. “Ha! You just got called a white boy!” He grinned and slapped Keith's shoulder.
Keith glared at the shorter boy next to him, his mouth formed into a frown. “Shut up…”
“I mean, technically you are from Texas so…” Pidge trailed off, a grin of her own forming on her face.
“I'm Korean too though!” Keith argued back, “My Dad is both!”
“Yeah and your Mom is an alien so…” Pidge said, tone waverly as she continued to smile.
“Yeah, pack it up yee-haw boy.” Lance said with a tilt of his head, his hand now resting on the back of Keith's chair which went unnoticed by both of the boys.
“I don't even have an accent!”
“Oh that's such a damn lie!” Lance gasped as he turned himself to fully face Keith, gearing himself up to go on a rant. “You have an accent for sure! It's mainly noticeable when you're very tired or when you're yelling at someone. Which, I would know because most of that yelling was towards me in the beginning.”
Keith as well as almost everyone else just stared at Lance. But he was not done.
“It also pops up on some words—”
“Okay, yes, that is actually true. I have noticed that.” Hunk chimed in, literally raising his pointing finger as he did so.
“Ya’ll are crazy.” Keith mumbled with a shake of his head before his eyes widened.
“HA! Yes! I told you!” Lance cheered, way too excited over something so small. “Some words, Keith. Some words!!”
Rachel suddenly gasped, leaning her elbow on the table before putting her chin in her palm. “Keith, say darling.”
“What?” Keith squeaked. “No!”
“Oh come on! Say it!”
“Hell no!”
“Oh my god,” Pidge mumbled under her breath, “He does have an accent.”
“Told youuu.” Lance said in a singy sort of tone.
“Keith, please say it. Just– look at Lance while you say it or something so you're at least looking at a man.” Veronica joined in on the pleading.
“Look at Lan– you know what, fine.” Keith took a deep breath, staring into Lance's eyes.
“Why are you looking into my eyes like that…” Lance mumbled, “You hate eye contact.”
“Just trying to make you as uncomfortable as possible.” Keith mumbled back before smirking, getting into character as he leaned his elbow on the table before resting his cheek in his palm. “Hey there darlin’, how's it goin’?”
The room went silent. All Lance could hear was his heartbeat practically beating a hole through his chest and going up his throat. And all he could feel was how red his body was getting.
Clearly his sisters noticed because they immediately started giggling. Keith also seemed to have noticed since his eyes widened ever so slightly, a tint of redness forming on his own cheeks.
“Woah.” Pidge said under her breath, “I think Lance just became gay.”
Clearing his throat, Lance clapped his hands together, “Wow, Keith, that was great. Definitely gonna woo the fellas with that one.” He then let out an awkward chuckle before facing forwards again.
“Thanks…Lance…” Keith replied before also turning back to his plate.
“Guys! Do you wanna see me shove a whole piece of bread in my mouth!?” Silvio shouted before attempting to put the whole roll of bread in his mouth. However, his attempt was cut short since his mother snatched it out of his mouth, whacking him on the head with it before scolding him in Spanish.
❦
After dinner, dessert was served. It was something Coran gave Nancy the recipe for. A common treat from Altea that they “Earthalized” since they didn't have the exact ingredients.
Coran gave a sad smile as the cake-like sweet was handed out around the table. “This was Allura’s favorite dessert back when she was a little girl.”
Most people looked up at him, giving him a sad smile in return or making a short sweet comment as well. There was a beat of silence and Lance couldn't bring himself to look up from his plate as he felt a few eyes not so suitably glance in his direction.
He felt himself grit his teeth together, practically staring a hole into his plate as he gripped the fork in his hand tighter. He hated this. He hated the pitied looks at him instead of Coran. The man who practically raised Allura!
He heard someone clear their throat, most likely his mother, before someone whispered something to another person. He was already fed up but even more so when he heard his name come out of their mouth.
He stood up rather quickly, startling both Keith and Hunk who were right next to him. Everyone else turned back to look at him as he stared at them all.
“I know I dated Allura but I'm not fragile. So stop giving me pity looks as if I'm the one hurting over her death.” He aggressively pointed to Coran before continuing, “He's the one hurting the most. He practically raised her! And Allura never loved me and my love for her wasn't even real.” His voice wobbled a bit. “She loved Lotor. Never me. She used me to get over him. Then she died and put these marks on my face,” he moved the finger that was pointing to Coran to point to his own face, “A permanent reminder of how foolish I was to believe her love was real.”
He took a deep breath, looking at everyone for a second longer before making his way out of the dining room. He headed out the front door, walking out onto the porch. Sighing quietly, he sat himself down on the porch steps, his arms overlapping on his legs as he rested his chin on them. The only thing he could do was just stare out into the vast field of grass, crops, and farm animals.
This was his life now. A farmer.
He refused to cry. He didn't even know what he would be crying over anyways. Certainly not Allura. Maybe because he finally said all of that out loud instead of letting it ring through his head repeatedly until it drove him mad?
Probably.
He heard the front door open and then close. Sighing, he closed his eyes, not prepared to talk to whoever came outside. But after a second, he opened his eyes again. Those footsteps were way too quiet to be anyone but–
Keith.
“If it was anyone else I think I'd scream my head off again.” Lance mumbled, his gaze on Keith as he sat down beside him on the steps.
“You didn't scream your head off.” Keith said gently.
Lance couldn't help but scoff. “Yeah. But I released a year's worth of pent up frustration over pity looks. I mean, that's just ridiculo–”
“Lance–”
Lance stopped and looked at him again. Keith, with his indigo eyes that were currently filled with a look he couldn't quite decipher. Not pity, but… dare he say, something deeper?
Keith took a deep breath before, “I'm really sorry you had to go through all of that alone.”
Lance felt his eyes shy away from looking into the older man's. “I wasn't alone. I had family–”
Keith shook his head, “I'm not talking about that.” He bit his lip as he looked off into the direction Lance was looking out at. Grassy field, pink sunset faded sky. Earth.
“Then what are you…?”
“I'm talking about when I left. For the Blades, I mean.”
Oh. Lance didn't think they'd ever have this conversation. At least not so soon. Not like this.
“You wanted to find out more about your heritage.” Lance shrugged, “Believe me, I get it.”
“No, that wasn't the full reason, though.” Keith said, still not facing Lance. Lance however, was now looking at him and no longer at the grassy field and pink sky.
“What do you mean?”
Keith wet his lips, a nervous habit of his that Lance always, always noticed him do. “I left so you wouldn't.”
Silence filled the air between them which was quickly replaced by the chirping sound of crickets.
It would've been funny if Lance wasn't so confused.
“What?” Lance eventually rasped out. He didn't really know how he felt knowing that information. The only thing he could pinpoint was shock.
“When you told me that you were thinking of stepping down, I knew I had to do something to keep you on the team. Because I knew– I know how much you love piloting. And, how much you loved being a Paladin.”
“I began to hate it after you left.” Lance whispered, still looking at Keith.
Keith finally looked back at him, whispering back. “I know.”
Those indigo eyes kept staring into his deep blue ones. Lance felt so, so confused and frustrated and sad. He just–
“If you knew how much it– how much it killed me, then why did you do it?” Lance asked, eyebrows pinched together as his voice cracked. He knew how quickly this conversation was escalating but he didn't know what to do about that.
“Because I thought it was for the best. That eventually, things would be okay for you.” Keith told him, his eyebrows pinched together as well.
“Keith, I hated it. I was excluded so badly from the team. And Shiro–” Lance stopped himself, “Shiro's clone– was absolutely terrible to me.” He pressed his lips together before continuing, “And then you went MIA for months! Years for you. I mean– seriously Keith, what were you even thinking?”
“I wasn't thinking.” Keith said through gritted teeth as he broke their eye contact. He fucking hated eye contact.
“Why weren't you thinking then?” Lance asked, voice rising.
“Because you were in love with Allura and I was in love with you and it was terrible. So all I knew was that you needed to stay a Paladin and I needed to get the fuck away. Out of your way.” Keith shut his eyes, his body facing forward, away from Lance.
Lance, meanwhile, was stunned, to say the least.
“You– you were in love with me?”
Keith opened his eyes and looked up at the sky. “Yeah.”
A moment of silence before– “Are you still?”
Another moment of silence.
“Yeah.”