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Washington sighed softly as he looked up at the twinkling stars and waning moon, eyes tracing over constellations familiar and foreign. The cold concrete of the roof of Blue base was strangely welcoming. His legs were dangling over the edge.
It was one of those nights where Wash’s thoughts were racing too fast for him to get any meaningful rest. It had been quiet for the past few days, which was allowing the demons in his mind to drag skeletons out of the closet.
Tonight their favorite subject appeared to be Maine and the man he had become.
Washington raised one of his hands to rub at his face as he felt his throat tightening, tears threatening to fall. Of all his fallen comrades, it just had to be Maine.
His free hand went to the dog tags that were resting against his chest. Was there something he could have done to prevent the Meta? That was his partner, for crying out loud. There was something he could have done. His thumb runs over the name etched into the metal of one of the three tags he had. But he knew the moment he laid his eyes on the Meta that the Maine he knew was long gone.
Gone were the surprisingly gentle squeezes of his hand to reassure him. That growly voice that he loved hearing say his name before the throat injury took his ability to speak. The way this harsh, dangerous man melted around him. It always made Wash feel powerful in a way. Knowing that he was Maines’ soft spot. Something he teased him about just to hear him growl and glare.
Washington didn’t even get to say a proper goodbye to the man that had held his heart. That was when the tears finally fell. He missed Maine.
“Hey Wash? Do you — Oh shit.” Tucker’s voice snapped him from his reminiscing. Wash moved his hand to look up at Tucker and his barely concealed concern. “Sorry. Didn’t realize…” He trailed off like he wasn’t even sure what he had walked in on.
“It’s fine. Don’t worry about it.” Washington managed as he wiped away the tears, then pushed himself into a sitting position. Putting his mind back into business as usual, shoving Maine back into the corner his memory occupied. “What did you need?”
“Caboose can’t sleep.” Tucker answered after a few minutes of just staring at him. “Wanted to know if you knew what he did with his stuffed bear.”
Washington thought about it for a moment, then shook his head. “I don’t, but I have a few ideas.” He got to his feet.
“Great.” Tucker said, then paused. “What were you doing up here, anyway?”
“Just… reminiscing about old friends.” Washington answered as he headed towards the stairs into the base. But Tucker stopped him with a hand on his forearm.
“If… you need to, you know, ever talk about it, I’m here.” Tucker offered. “I know how much you cared for them… Especially The Met — Maine.”
“I appreciate it.” Washington offered him a bare smile. “I’ll keep it in mind.”
That seemed to be enough for Tucker as he let go of his arm and they searched for Cabooses bear.
Their teammate already had it and just wanted the other two with him.
Washington may have missed Maine and the others dearly. But where he was now wasn’t so bad. He definitely wouldn’t give it up without a fight. Even if the Blues sometimes annoyed him.
But what friends didn’t from time to time?