Chapter Text
Hal gritted his teeth and strained against the rope binding him in place. The Key, a villain the newly formed Justice League had never seen before, injected his mysterious serum into Batman’s exposed forearm with a crackle. Batman strained against his bonds, but the Key had trussed him up tighter than a turkey on Thanksgiving.
“Now,” he crooned, “I think I’ll start with your greatest weakness.” Hal dredged up all the willpower he could muster in his aching bones, panic jolting through him. Batman was the backbone of their little operation and had been ever since the beginning. He was the master detective and tactician in charge of most of their planning, and Hal was pretty sure Batman knew enough unique information about each of them to figure out all their identities if he wanted. If this Key guy really could force him to tell the truth, the Justice League might be in serious trouble.
“Batman, what do you love most in the world?” The Key said. Hal thought of all they had to lose, the innocents who would suffer, and he felt the power building in his hand.
“D–D–” Batman spasmed violently in his restraints.
“Yes?” said the Key.
“Rrhh…” Blood dribbled down Batman’s chin.
Hal snapped. A wordless scream burst out of him as green power surged from his ring, knocking the Key back and encasing him in something like a superpowered crate before slamming him through the wall. The crashing, scraping sounds as the Key tried to escape echoed behind him and rang in Hal’s ears long after the containment crate skidded out of sight.
“Dick,” Batman gasped out into the resounding silence that followed. Then, apparently having used every last ounce of energy fighting the truth serum, he passed out right there in the interrogation chair.
Hal… it was going to take a minute for Hal to process that.
“Excuse me?” The Flash said, voice approaching a shriek. “I mean. What?”
Hal slowly got to his feet, his ropes having been sliced through by his construct. He dusted himself off and got his butt in gear to help Flash release the others from their restraints. He felt like he was moving through a dream sequence.
“Dick,” the Flash muttered to himself. “Superman has Kryptonite, most of us are susceptible to, like, poison or something. Manhunter has fire. And what does the Bat say? Dick.”
Hal used his ring to make a key and release Aquaman from his cuffs as Flash fiddled with the controls on the strange tube containing Martian Manhunter. Unfortunately, they were all still stunned and clumsy in their shock.
“Perhaps I am more ignorant to the world of man that I previously assumed,” said Wonder Woman thoughtfully, gracefully stepping out of her own containment chamber. “I had thought Dick was a shortened or affectionate term for a man called Richard, but your reactions make me believe that is not the case.”
Hal choked, and tried to come up with anything he could say that was not absolutely mortifying.
Fortunately, Flash recovered faster. “Uh, sorry about that. Ma’am. It’s sort of become a term to mean a man’s… you know…” he trailed off.
Wonder Woman’s brow furrowed. “I’m afraid I do not know.”
Hal spared a moment to be relieved that Superman was still unconscious and couldn’t hear what he was about to say. That guy was too innocent for the world. “It sounded to us like Batman’s greatest weakness is sex. With a man.”
“Ah!” Wonder Woman’s expression cleared. “Well, why did you not just say so?”
“Never mind,” Flash muttered. Hal made mortified eye contact with him, and the two of them had a moment of silent agreement: neither of them would ever willingly talk about this day ever again.
Aquaman clapped his hands, getting their attention. “So!” he said. “How are we going to get everyone back to the Watchtower?”
Hal had never volunteered to leave a crime scene so fast in his life.
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Bat Speculation League
February 19
Flash: so i think robin is probably a dude. in light of recent evidence
GL: Agreed
Aquaman: It does seem likely.
MM: He did not say anything about Robin specifically.
Flash: i dont think he needed to after today
Superman: I really do not want any more mental images, thanks.
GL: But Superman it’s his greatest weakness! We gotta be aware!
MM: Somehow I don’t believe this weakness will become an issue in the field of battle.
Flash: you never know so we better be prepared!!
GL: I wonder if there are any specifics we should be aware of. For battle strategy purposes.
Superman has left the chat.
MM has left the chat.
Aquaman: Are you quite finished?
GL: ok ok, sheesh
Superman has been added to the chat.
MM has been added to the chat.
Superman: Is it safe?
Flash: sorry guys
MM: I do not appreciate a chat which disrespects our teammates in such a manner
GL: sorry
Flash: so… batman and robin? totally an item??
Aquaman: Indeed
GL: definitely
MM: It is possible.
Superman: Most likely.
Flash: man its so crazy to think of batman with a partner. i wonder what his name is
Aquaman: Perhaps someday when we have built up more trust we will be able to learn.