Chapter Text
Reuniting with friends shouldn’t have been this complicated.
And yet here you were: standing in the elevator that led up to Trip and Grace’s apartment. Your fingers hesitated in pressing the buttons – was it the 10th floor? The 11th? You racked your brain trying to remember the details they told you over the phone.
“You should come over!” Trip was so insistent you visit. Something about a trip to Italy, something about trying a new cocktail recipe he learned. You pursed your lips on the other end of the receiver when he spoke to you. It was hard to bite your tongue.
And yet, you agreed to his request, despite how much you wanted to avoid it. You had been avoiding the couple as a whole – in fact, you tried to make your visits as few and far between as possible. It was easier that way.
Your eyes glazed over the buttons as you made a selection. The door closed and you watched as the numbers above slowly ticked up – a tightness in your chest forming as you grew closer to their floor. You inhaled sharply and the stuffy elevator air made everything even more suffocating.
How many years had it been since you genuinely hung out with the two of them? Not in a group – just alone. There had been a number of parties and get-togethers you’d attended, but it was easy to distance yourself the more crowded the event was. And yet, you’d always find your eyes drifting across the bar.
They always returned to her. No matter how hard you tried, your eyes always met Grace’s.
She’d share a glance with you, and you’d see a smile form on her lips, but before she could come to meet you, you’d manage to slip into the crowd. It was easier for you, for her, for everyone.
You’d been keeping up with her life online. It was the only real connection you had left with her. MySpace was still new, and it boomed in popularity. You’d made an account about a year ago and before you knew it all these people from your past were adding you to their friend’s list. You were sorted into top friend spaces by a few of them, and you found yourself perusing your old friend’s blog entries and photo albums.
You didn’t seek Grace out at first, but one day you received a friend request from her newly created profile. You found yourself clicking through anything and everything she posted. It wasn’t much at first, but your heart would skip a beat when you’d see her “online now!” icon flash underneath her profile picture. You’d read her blog, check out her bulletin posts, listen to the music on her profile – it was anything to feel a little bit of closeness to her once more.
The thought of messaging her crossed your mind more times than you could count, but you restrained yourself from doing so. You’d comment on something from time to time, but that was the extent of it. You would maintain a healthy distance between the two of you as much as you could.
One day, you noticed Grace changed her profile picture. You instinctively found yourself clicking on it without a second thought. Your chest tightened as you stared at it.
“Feeling nostalgic! I’ve been missing the old times lately…”
The photo that was once her and her husband had now been replaced by a much older one. It looked like a scan of a disposable camera picture. In it was you and Grace, but you were much younger. You were in college and her arms were wrapped tightly around you, holding you close. There was a smile on both of your faces – it was the brightest smile you’d seen on Grace’s face in years.
You could remember that moment – it was the start of your first year in college together. It was also right after you asked Grace to be your girlfriend.
She’d been so excited about the idea of being official. You’d been casually dating for so long before that point, and there had been a series of hookups and casual intimacy since your senior year in high school. She was the one who actually influenced you to go to the same college as her. She wanted everything and got everything – even you.
That moment was so vivid in your mind. You were cheesy about it, even though she claimed she didn’t like romantic gestures. You brought her a bouquet of flowers and right there in the courtyard of your school you asked her out. The way she practically jumped into your arms almost knocked you down onto the pavement. One of your friends was quick with the camera – capturing the moment of pure joy on both of your faces.
There were more photos from the day. Your friends were in on helping you ask her out. After they were developed, you and Grace each took a handful of them, displaying them in your respective dorm rooms. You were sure you still had your share tucked away in a box somewhere in your closet.
Seeing that photo led you to browse the rest of her profile, checking to see if she’d updated anything else. Her profile wasn’t anything too out of the ordinary, but you could see where she fiddled with the HTML code here and there to make it uniquely her own. The thought of her own artistic touch coming out in it made you smile.
You scrolled through the profile, stopping as you reached her friend's list.
Trip was no longer among her top friends.
He’d held the number one spot for so long. Pretty much since the creation of her profile, she had him there. It led you to investigate more and more, digging into each of their profiles to see how much or how little they continued to post about each other.
“Who the Hell is Maria?” You asked yourself that question as you looked through Trip’s profile. She’d made a lot of comments on a lot of his things. You pursed your lips as you read the exchanges.
As you reached the floor of their apartment, you snapped out of your thoughts. It was easy to admit you agreed to this visit for more reasons than Trip’s insistent request. You were a little selfish about it. You wanted more information on what the Hell had been going on behind closed doors. But more importantly – you wondered if Grace’s feelings still lingered like yours did.